One Sunday Dr. Blagovo turned up unexpectedly.
He was wearing a military tunic over a silk shirt
and high boots of patent leather.
“I have come to see you,”
he began, shaking my hand heartily like a student.
“I am hearing about you every day, and I have
been meaning to come and have a heart-to-heart talk,
as they say. The boredom in the town is awful,
there is not a living soul, no one to say a word to.
It’s hot, Holy Mother,” he went on, taking
off his tunic and sitting in his silk shirt.
“My dear fellow, let me talk to you.”
I was dull myself, and had for a long
time been craving for the society of someone not a
house painter. I was genuinely glad to see him.
“I’ll begin by saying,”
he said, sitting down on my bed, “that I sympathize
with you from the bottom of my heart, and deeply respect
the life you are leading. They don’t understand
you here in the town, and, indeed, there is no one
to understand, seeing that, as you know, they are
all, with very few exceptions, regular Gogolesque
pig faces here. But I saw what you were at once
that time at the picnic. You are a noble soul,
an honest, high-minded man! I respect you, and
feel it a great honour to shake hands with you!”
he went on enthusiastically. “To have made
such a complete and violent change of life as you
have done, you must have passed through a complicated
spiritual crisis, and to continue this manner of life
now, and to keep up to the high standard of your convictions
continually, must be a strain on your mind and heart
from day to day. Now to begin our talk, tell
me, don’t you consider that if you had spent
your strength of will, this strained activity, all
these powers on something else, for instance, on gradually
becoming a great scientist, or artist, your life would
have been broader and deeper and would have been more
productive?”
We talked, and when we got upon manual
labour I expressed this idea: that what is wanted
is that the strong should not enslave the weak, that
the minority should not be a parasite on the majority,
nor a vampire for ever sucking its vital sap; that
is, all, without exception, strong and weak, rich
and poor, should take part equally in the struggle
for existence, each one on his own account, and that
there was no better means for equalizing things in
that way than manual labour, in the form of universal
service, compulsory for all.
“Then do you think everyone
without exception ought to engage in manual labour?”
asked the doctor.
“Yes.”
“And don’t you think that
if everyone, including the best men, the thinkers
and great scientists, taking part in the struggle for
existence, each on his own account, are going to waste
their time breaking stones and painting roofs, may
not that threaten a grave danger to progress?”
“Where is the danger?”
I asked. “Why, progress is in deeds of love,
in fulfilling the moral law; if you don’t enslave
anyone, if you don’t oppress anyone, what further
progress do you want?”
“But, excuse me,” Blagovo
suddenly fired up, rising to his feet. “But,
excuse me! If a snail in its shell busies itself
over perfecting its own personality and muddles about
with the moral law, do you call that progress?”
“Why muddles?” I said,
offended. “If you don’t force your
neighbour to feed and clothe you, to transport you
from place to place and defend you from your enemies,
surely in the midst of a life entirely resting on
slavery, that is progress, isn’t it? To
my mind it is the most important progress, and perhaps
the only one possible and necessary for man.”
“The limits of universal world
progress are in infinity, and to talk of some ‘possible’
progress limited by our needs and temporary theories
is, excuse my saying so, positively strange.”
“If the limits of progress are
in infinity as you say, it follows that its aims are
not definite,” I said. “To live without
knowing definitely what you are living for!”
“So be it! But that ‘not
knowing’ is not so dull as your ‘knowing.’
I am going up a ladder which is called progress, civilization,
culture; I go on and up without knowing definitely
where I am going, but really it is worth living for
the sake of that delightful ladder; while you know
what you are living for, you live for the sake of
some people’s not enslaving others, that the
artist and the man who rubs his paints may dine equally
well. But you know that’s the petty, bourgeois,
kitchen, grey side of life, and surely it is revolting
to live for that alone? If some insects do enslave
others, bother them, let them devour each other!
We need not think about them. You know they will
die and decay just the same, however zealously you
rescue them from slavery. We must think of that
great millennium which awaits humanity in the remote
future.”
Blagovo argued warmly with me, but
at the same time one could see he was troubled by
some irrelevant idea.
“I suppose your sister is not
coming?” he said, looking at his watch.
“She was at our house yesterday, and said she
would be seeing you to-day. You keep saying slavery,
slavery . . .” he went on. “But you
know that is a special question, and all such questions
are solved by humanity gradually.”
We began talking of doing things gradually.
I said that “the question of doing good or evil
every one settles for himself, without waiting till
humanity settles it by the way of gradual development.
Moreover, this gradual process has more than one aspect.
Side by side with the gradual development of human
ideas the gradual growth of ideas of another order
is observed. Serfdom is no more, but the capitalist
system is growing. And in the very heyday of emancipating
ideas, just as in the days of Baty, the majority feeds,
clothes, and defends the minority while remaining
hungry, inadequately clad, and defenceless. Such
an order of things can be made to fit in finely with
any tendencies and currents of thought you like, because
the art of enslaving is also gradually being cultivated.
We no longer flog our servants in the stable, but
we give to slavery refined forms, at least, we succeed
in finding a justification for it in each particular
case. Ideas are ideas with us, but if now, at
the end of the nineteenth century, it were possible
to lay the burden of the most unpleasant of our physiological
functions upon the working class, we should certainly
do so, and afterwards, of course, justify ourselves
by saying that if the best people, the thinkers and
great scientists, were to waste their precious time
on these functions, progress might be menaced with
great danger.”
But at this point my sister arrived.
Seeing the doctor she was fluttered and troubled,
and began saying immediately that it was time for
her to go home to her father.
“Kleopatra Alexyevna,”
said Blagovo earnestly, pressing both hands to his
heart, “what will happen to your father if you
spend half an hour or so with your brother and me?”
He was frank, and knew how to communicate
his liveliness to others. After a moment’s
thought, my sister laughed, and all at once became
suddenly gay as she had been at the picnic. We
went out into the country, and lying in the grass
went on with our talk, and looked towards the town
where all the windows facing west were like glittering
gold because the sun was setting.
After that, whenever my sister was
coming to see me Blagovo turned up too, and they always
greeted each other as though their meeting in my room
was accidental. My sister listened while the doctor
and I argued, and at such times her expression was
joyfully enthusiastic, full of tenderness and curiosity,
and it seemed to me that a new world she had never
dreamed of before, and which she was now striving
to fathom, was gradually opening before her eyes.
When the doctor was not there she was quiet and sad,
and now if she sometimes shed tears as she sat on
my bed it was for reasons of which she did not speak.
In August Radish ordered us to be
ready to go to the railway-line. Two days before
we were “banished” from the town my father
came to see me. He sat down and in a leisurely
way, without looking at me, wiped his red face, then
took out of his pocket our town Messenger,
and deliberately, with emphasis on each word, read
out the news that the son of the branch manager of
the State Bank, a young man of my age, had been appointed
head of a Department in the Exchequer.
“And now look at you,”
he said, folding up the newspaper, “a beggar,
in rags, good for nothing! Even working-class
people and peasants obtain education in order to become
men, while you, a Poloznev, with ancestors of rank
and distinction, aspire to the gutter! But I
have not come here to talk to you; I have washed my
hands of you ” he added in a stifled
voice, getting up. “I have come to find
out where your sister is, you worthless fellow.
She left home after dinner, and here it is nearly
eight and she is not back. She has taken to going
out frequently without telling me; she is less dutiful
and I see in it your evil and degrading
influence. Where is she?”
In his hand he had the umbrella I
knew so well, and I was already flustered and drew
myself up like a schoolboy, expecting my father to
begin hitting me with it, but he noticed my glance
at the umbrella and most likely that restrained him.
“Live as you please!”
he said. “I shall not give you my blessing!”
“Holy Saints!” my nurse
muttered behind the door. “You poor, unlucky
child! Ah, my heart bodes ill!”
I worked on the railway-line.
It rained without stopping all August; it was damp
and cold; they had not carried the corn in the fields,
and on big farms where the wheat had been cut by machines
it lay not in sheaves but in heaps, and I remember
how those luckless heaps of wheat turned blacker every
day and the grain was sprouting in them. It was
hard to work; the pouring rain spoiled everything we
managed to do. We were not allowed to live or
to sleep in the railway buildings, and we took refuge
in the damp and filthy mud huts in which the navvies
had lived during the summer, and I could not sleep
at night for the cold and the woodlice crawling on
my face and hands. And when we worked near the
bridges the navvies used to come in the evenings in
a gang, simply in order to beat the painters
it was a form of sport to them. They used to beat
us, to steal our brushes. And to annoy us and
rouse us to fight they used to spoil our work; they
would, for instance, smear over the signal boxes with
green paint. To complete our troubles, Radish
took to paying us very irregularly. All the painting
work on the line was given out to a contractor; he
gave it out to another; and this subcontractor gave
it to Radish after subtracting twenty per cent. for
himself. The job was not a profitable one in
itself, and the rain made it worse; time was wasted;
we could not work while Radish was obliged to pay
the fellows by the day. The hungry painters almost
came to beating him, called him a cheat, a blood-sucker,
a Judas, while he, poor fellow, sighed, lifted up
his hand to Heaven in despair, and was continually
going to Madame Tcheprakov for money.