“I have been imagining you in
Paris,” wrote Marie, “having a delightful,
bohemian time. My ideas of Paris are all derived
from reading Balzac, who has certainly created the
most delightful, gay and mysterious, sad, mystic,
sordid, everything one could wish in a city of dreams
and realities.
“When Terry brought me ‘Evelyn
Innes,’ by George Moore, the other day, I dug
into it with zeal and delight, and was surprised and
pleased with his subtle psychology, during the first
part of the story; but psychology can be carried to
the point where it becomes incomprehensible, stupefying
and monotonous. I finally grew indescribably
weary of the problems of Evelyn’s soul, but I
kept on to the end, and then sank back on my pillow
exhausted. I think I shall stop reading for a
while, lest I have literary indigestion. I’ll
try to be satisfied for the time with Swinburne and
Shelley. Our anarchistic poet lectured on Shelley,
the Poet of Revolution, the other night, and I was
disappointed. He did not do justice to Shelley
either as a revolutionary poet or as a poet of beauty.
I think Shelley should be spoken of with a delicate
passion, which our anarchist poet lacks. He tried
hard to speak with fervour, but there is no fire in
him, and what is a poet without fire? Perhaps
it was as well, for what’s the use in casting
pearls before swine? For the critics in the audience
arose and condemned Shelley because he was a socialist,
or because he was not one. Some of these critics
seized upon the word libidinous. Oh! there was
their clue! The lecturer arose like an outraged
moralist to repudiate the scandalous charge of libidinousness.
I was so disgusted I vowed I would never go to another
meeting.
“I have indeed been going to
so many ‘humanity lectures,’ and clubs,
such as the Shelley Club, where the divine anarchist
B misinterprets the great bard
every week to his flock of female admirers, and had
been reading so much Swinburne and other sublime things
that recently I have had a reaction, and there is
nothing now at the Salon except Nietzsche. He
is a relief, although I feel that if I were to keep
on with him I should go mad. When I feel my brain
begin to turn, I start scrubbing or some other stupid
thing.
“Though Nietzsche says some
very bitter things about women, who have no place
whatever in his scheme of things, except perhaps for
the relaxation of the warriors, yet there is something
dignified in his very denunciation. His attitude
toward our sex is so different from that of Schopenhauer,
and many other philosophers. They usually take
the ’rag and a bone and a hank of hair’
attitude, and are disgusting. But Nietzsche warns
men that women are dangerous, and danger, in Nietzsche’s
philosophy, is a sublime thing. Also, we must
become the mothers of his Overmen.
“Terry, too, is much interested
just now in Nietzsche; quite naturally, for Terry
is one of those ‘men of resolute indolence’
who will not work without delight in his labour.
He talks a great deal just now of a plan to seek some
cave and there try to become an ‘Overman.’
I pointed out to him that that was difficult, for
to become an Overman he must of course ‘keep
holy his highest thought,’ without being disturbed
by the struggle for existence, and that, like Zarathustra,
he must have an eagle and a serpent to minister to
his wants. And I suggested that I might be his
eagle, for Zarathustra says that woman is still either
a cat or a bird or at best a cow. I prefer to
believe that I am a bird, and as such could minister
to my sweet Overman. But Terry wouldn’t
have it so, and replied that of course I was a bird,
in a way, but he would rather have me as a pussy,
or as a combination of cat, bird, and cow. I thought
that too cruel, so now I am determined to be none
of them, but to become an Overwoman, and so be a fitting
relaxation for my warrior, my Overman. ’Tis
but a step from the sublime to the ridiculous, and
I think, in this letter, I have made that step.”
Marie’s moods are many, and
in her next letter she wrote in quite a different
vein:
“I almost wept when reading
your letter about the baby. Perhaps it was because
of the line, ‘A little daughter was born to me.’
It recalled to me this Christmas time many years ago
when I was a little child and I heard the story of
the little Jesus. ‘And unto us a child was
born.’ How those words ring in my ears!
So vividly come back to me the pity I felt when I
heard the story of the poor little infant born to be
crucified. It always made me cry out
of pity, the pity of it all! And I wonder if
we are not all, all of us, born to be crucified.
“But I suppose I must congratulate
you on assuming the responsibility of fatherhood for
the third time. You might long ago have studied
pre-natal influences and the rights of the unborn.
I hope you have not neglected these sacred duties.
It surprised me that you wished for a girl, for not
long ago you expressed the opinion that women were
soulless creatures without memory! Suppose your
daughter should not be an exception, how would you
feel then?... You have been very active.
As for me, I fear my only activity will be that of
a dreamer. I differ from the dreaming class only
in one respect and that is, in making confidences,
which dreamers never do. They shrivel up into
themselves. They usually create their own sorrows,
which have no remedy except the joys they also invent.
They are natural only when alone, and talk well only
to themselves.”
In the same letter she plunges into
the gossip of the Salon:
“I don’t blame Scott for
his carelessness. The poor fellow has been suffering
terribly because of his wife, who has left him and
gone off with a new love to a new home. Scott
has been quite heroic about it, but he suffers.
You know how in our radical society men and women try
to deny that they are jealous, try to give freedom
to each other. But whatever our ideas may be,
we cannot control our fundamental instincts, and poor
Scott is now a wounded thing, I can assure you.
But he speaks beautifully of his wife even
packed up her things for her and escorted her to the
new place.
“Scott came here the other night
with your friend the journalist, Fiske, who has become
quite a part of our little society. I am sorry
to say that he is quite sad, too, but for a different
reason. The poor fellow seems to be suffering
from lack of literary inspirations. He has a habit
of asking people what shall he write about. He
asks Terry, and even me, and in pity I am trying to
write up the old women in our tenement for him....
“I see a good deal of Thompson
and his wife Minna. Now that Thompson, who was
a famous radical, is more prosperous, he is growing
careful and conservative. The glory of her husband
is reflected in Minna. I don’t call at
their home so much as I did, because I made what they
call a break there the other day. I thoughtlessly
introduced myself as Miss L
to someone of his relatives or relatives’ friends,
after she had already introduced me as Mrs. C .
And Thompson informed me next day that it was inconvenient
to explain such things to conservative people, and
that I ought to be more careful in dealing with the
unenlightened ones. I suppose I ought to think
more of the reputation of my friends.”
Marie likes the Jews of the Salon,
many of them, very much, but there are some she doesn’t,
as the following shows:
“Things are rather dead in the
‘movement,’ just now. But there is
something doing among the Jewish radicals, who, you
know, are very important in any radical movement here
in Chicago. No wonder things are lively when
the Jews have such a leader as Mr. Kohen, whom one
might believe to be the long wanted Messiah, destined
to lead his race into the promised land, which is
evidently Chicago. There was a hot time about
three weeks ago in the Masonic Temple meeting when
this modern prophet demonstrated to us who were not
Jews that they (he and his friends) were the chosen
people who would not only liberate themselves but
also us from the yoke of capitalist oppression; and
contrary to all previous rules, they would do this
without any consideration of moneys; all that Mr.
Kohen expected in return was due appreciation.
I suppose I ought to be grateful to Mr. Kohen, but
somehow I am not. I ought, too, to be grateful
to our Jewish Madonna, Esther, but there again I am
not. Poor girl! she is really the Madonna of
the Chicago movement. All the sorrows and troubles
of the Salon rest upon her poor shoulders, and she
silently suffers, sacrifices and redeems. Then
there is little Sara, another chosen one. It
is she who is chosen to make men miserable for the
good of their souls. She has been very pensive
since the great poet B left, for
now she has no one to worry about. I suggested
to her that she might worry about Terry, if she liked,
and she said she would try, with a weary little sigh.
It was she who one day explained to me at great length
that all love except sensual love was of a transient
character. If, she said, man swears he loves you,
but does not show any physical interest in you, you
can bet that his passion is of that intangible sort
that has the radiant tints but also the evanescence
of dew!...
“I am going to a ball next Sunday
night. It’s on the Jewish holiday in memory
of the time when poor Moses led the Jews from Egypt
and they had to eat unleavened bread. All the
orthodox Jews will spend the day praying in the synagogue,
without tasting food or drink. They make up for
it the next day, though, you bet. The ball is
given every year by the radical Jews, usually right
in the Ghetto, and nearly always the followers of
holy Moses jump on those who no longer follow, and
there’s a hot time. Last year the radical
Jews, mostly anarchists, had to have police protection!
The police are good for something, after all!
What should we do without them? We would exterminate
each other without delay!”
Perhaps Marie’s temporary “grouch”
against the Jews was partly due to the irruption into
her Society of three new and attractive Israelites
of her own sex an event happening about
that time. In one of these newcomers, Terry,
it appears, was somewhat interested, and Marie has
often admitted that her philosophy of freedom is powerless
to overcome her “fundamental emotions.”
Writing of Miss B she said:
“She is a regular little Becky Sharp, very demure
and quiet, and proper and distinguished. All
the women hate her, and the men flock about her, for
she is pretty and a free lover, of course. She
comes once or twice a week to our salon, and then
Terry is always present, and they get along famously.
She talks of ‘the realm of physics,’ or
‘of biology,’ and I admit it bores me,
her voice is so monotonous. She takes evident
pleasure in Terry’s society. Perhaps I am
a little jealous, but it does not make me feel any
different toward him, and that is the main thing,
the only thing I really care about....
“I must admit that I grow tired
at times of the ‘movement.’ Kate says
she has cut it out altogether, and Terry goes to the
meetings very seldom. I dutifully attend the
lectures, where they talk about the same old things
in the same old way, and also the socials and
visit the comrades once in a while. But they
do get on my nerves sometimes. I prefer to stay
at home, in the inner circle of the salon, reading
and sucking at my cigarette when I have one.
I scrub the floor once in a while, just because of
sheer weariness from not doing anything.
“Terry has been writing an article
on ‘the general strike,’ but did not finish
it. He is like me in lacking energy enough to
carry out any plan or purpose unless great pressure
is brought to bear upon him either from within or
without. I am sure that if he continued to feel
strongly about the general strike he would go on to
finish it. But he has a great distrust, really,
of the ‘labour’ movement and of labour
leaders. He believes that all social improvement
must come from the workers, but how many difficulties
there are! One of the greatest is the lack of
good leaders. I myself have not much hope for
the workers as long as they remain sheep who are lost
without leaders, are dependent and led either by honest
men who know not clearly how, where, or why, or by
intelligent men, whose intelligence usually takes
the form of trickery and self-interest. The intelligent
honest ones seem not to be cut out to be leaders,
or successful in any way. Sheep are led or driven
most easily by those who can make the most noise,
and they follow as readily over the precipice as over
the road. The slightest thing serves to frighten
and scatter them in all directions, in outward confusion
and helplessness, unless the burly insistent watchers
are for ever at their heels. Leaders of such
a herd must often be unscrupulous to have any success,
must use their intelligence for all sorts of devices,
often cruel and unjust, to keep their flocks from
wandering: any means justifies the end, which
is the good of the cause.
“Perhaps it is a good sign that
people from the higher walks of life are beginning
to take notice of the workingman’s problem, and
maybe the ideal leader will come from above, but even
so I doubt if that will help much. I have a feeling
that all movements dependent on leaders must necessarily
fail. Of course, I know that the people of the
‘higher life’ fear the stupidity and brutality
of the mass of workers, and argue that leaders are
necessary to guide and restrain them. This is
only partly true; there is hardly any doubt about
the stupidity of the mob, but they are not at all
so brutal. True, during times of strike they will
throw stones and slug strike-breakers, but they are
not nearly as brutal as the ‘scabs,’ who
are incited, aided, and protected by the employers
and police, and who lack the emotional exaltation
which often inspires the workers to this violence.
“During the teamsters’
strike I witnessed a scene where the strikers hustled
the scabs, overturned several huge wagons loaded with
beef, in the centre of one of the poorest districts
of Chicago, where the people were suffering from want
of meat, but the wretches did not even have sense
enough to help themselves from this plentiful store
which was left on the street guarded only by one or
two policemen. And there would have been no danger
of arrest, for the policemen could easily have been
swept aside by the rest of the mob. It made me
mad. I felt like shouting at them, ‘you
fools, why don’t you help yourselves?’
How differently a hungry bunch of kids would have
acted!”
Terry, in his very different way,
wrote on the same subject:
“I never knew a sincere, not
to say honest, labour leader, from business agent
up. Poor prolétaire! forever crucified between
two sets of thieves one rioting on his
rights, the other carousing on his wrongs. Labour
plods while plunder plays, thus runs the world away.
But if he should take it into his thick head to be
his own walking delegate some day!”
This strange master of the “salon,”
this poetic interpreter of the philosophy of the man
who has nothing, has, in spite of his pessimisms,
a profound mystic hope. He wrote:
“That toiling humanity the
labour movement to me is a thing so vast,
that whatever other movements try to exclude themselves
from it, they must be swallowed up in it. All
other things are but the shadows cast behind or before
the ever-marching phalanx of the unconquerable, the
imperishable prolétaire. This is the hope
which sends its thrill through us when nothing else
can. At the bottom of my heart I know I am living
but for one thing, and my life has been nothing but
a preparation for this. Of and for myself I have
accomplished nothing: for to be ever ready and
alert is not accomplishment.... I see a profound
hope in the prolétaire, for to him is granted
that intense, wistful awareness of his common lot
and life with his fellows. His very crowding in
factories and tenements, salons, unions, and brothels,
brings it home to him. Yes, this very lack of
space must remorselessly rub it in, even by dumb,
physical close contact. The friction resulting
from ten living in one room must make one of them
phosphorescent and capable of giving light
to humanity. The tenement houses are harmless
boxes of lucifers as long as none is ignited.
The inhabitants are wofully benighted, but they possess
wonderfully the quality of brotherhood, of oneness,
hence arises their wonderful psychology and their
aesthetics, so full and overflowing with pathos, so
piercing, it carries one to that borderland where comic
and tragic make marriage.
“This strange crowding in our
consciousness of things that do not seem to come from
us and yet are of us this clamouring consciousness
is what drives me to despair and makes me feel I have
not the form or shadow of things, though I may have
the substance. Yet I am determined to strain
my self-consciousness even to the breaking point; for
though I know madness lies that way, there stands
my Ideal, beckoning. I must grasp this great
common thing which comes from all of us, from us crowded
proletarians, and yet is not in any one of us.
Together we enjoy and suffer more than any one of
us alone. There is, I believe, something deeper
than the deepest woe: our racial consciousness
is there and we must find it. At moments of great
insight we are suddenly made aware of this, the mysterious
unity of the Race, but it is flashed and gone and
we must await another crisis. It is only in moments
of sublime sorrow that the depths of the racial consciousness
is heaved up to us. Joy cannot do this, for joy
is narrow and wants us to do away with sorrow; but
sorrow never wants us to do away with joy. Keats
always beheld joy in an external attitude of farewell
and this is profoundly and perfectly mystical and
real: joy is swallowed up in something deeper,
away down in the common racial consciousness.
We must all strive to be men beyond essential harm;
else, standing blindly before the meaning and destiny
of the race, we should go mad. Most of us try
to think, intellectuals; fear to abandon ourselves
to alarming states of feeling where reason is crowded
to the wall. And yet I feel that by abandoning
ourselves completely to mere feeling lies our only
hope to find the logic of the race that no individual
reason can master.
“Let me tell you of something
that recently happened to me which shows how strong
this race feeling is, as opposed to merely individual
or family feeling. I heard that my mother was
dying. I had become reconciled long ago, had
seen many things more clearly; for if joy is of the
heart, sorrow is of the soul, by which we see.
I wonder if woman has a ‘lake’ in her
heart. I used to think my mother had, and when
I called to see her once more, the old love-longing
caught me by the throat. My presence seemed to
help her some, but, though moved, I had passed beyond
the family boundary-line, and was engaged in stripping
myself of everything not belonging to the soul.
If I wish to be something more than myself, I must
be prepared to lose all, even myself. And what
is my family and my mother?”
Terry does not like to use the word
“religion.” But he certainly belongs
to the type of the religious man. One of the most
marked characteristics of the religious temperament
is this abandonment of personal and family ties, this
indifference and often hostility to social law, “this
emotional devotion to something intangible.”
All the anarchists and social rebels I have known
have, more or less, the religious temperament, although
a large part of their activity is employed in scoffing
at and reviling religion as they think the
God of theology has been largely responsible for the
organisation of social and political injustice.
But the deeply religious spirits have often been hostile
to theology, as well as to all other complicated forms
of society. Here are some religious words:
“There must be some meaning,”
wrote Terry, “for all this ancient agony.
Oh, that I might expand my written words into an Epic
of the Slums, into an Iliad of the Prolétaire!
If an oyster can turn its pain into a pearl, then,
verily, when we have suffered enough, something must
arise out of our torture else the world
has no meaning. On this theory, all my pangs
are still to come. I too will arise out of my
sacrificial self and look back on my former bondage
in amaze, even as I now look down on the dizzy slums
where I am and yet am not! It cannot be that I
came up out of the depths for nothing. If I could
pierce my heart and write red lines, I might perhaps
tell the truth. But only a High Silence meets
me, and I do not understand. In letting myself
down to the bottomless, I discovered I could not stand
it long enough. I am dumbly dissatisfied.
I feel like a diver who has nigh strangled himself
to bring up a handful of seaweed, and so feels he
must down again and again until
he attains somewhere the holy meaning of Life.”
Terry feels that somehow deep in his
life he has been crucified, that society has nailed
him to the cross:
“I was alone on the cross and
with bloodshot, beseeching eyes beheld the world objectively.
Yet I was aware of a harmony beyond me, though not
in me or around me.”
It is this “harmony beyond,”
this religious sense of “something far more
deeply interfused” which, ever conscious in the
idealist’s mind, makes the concrete vision of
everyday fact so ugly, leads to anarchism of feeling
profound and constant.
But in this world, which as a whole
the heart rejects “my heart,”
said Terry, “is the last analysis of all things” the
idealist sees things of beauty which constitute for
him the elements of perfection, elements which in
some future state he dreams may be fully realised in
a social whole.
“I saw a fine thing from the
window to-day,” Terry wrote, “a thing of
sheer delight, the complete transfiguration of a human
being. An Italian street labourer came into the
yard and sprawled on the grass to eat his own lunch.
He was bandy-legged from being coaxed to stand alone
too soon. But he had a most wonderful face; all
the mobility which toil had banished from his form
must have sought refuge in his eyes and his caressing
countenance. Catching sight of some children playing
‘house,’ he jumped up and in a most charming
way offered them all of his cakes and went back to
his luncheon. The children instinctively brought
him back some of the cakes, which he not only refused,
but offered them the rest of his food. They gathered
in a semicircle while he spoke to them. There
came something in his face and attitude which I have
seen many ‘cultured’ people vainly attempt.
He absolutely was one of them; the children stood
spell-bound, dazed at the sudden transformation of
a man into a child. The imagination that can
become one with its object is a high form of unconscious
art and rests upon the heart and the mass feeling
of the race. The ancient folk-lore and ballads
must have arisen from some such fusion as this.
How unfair, at least unwise, it is to judge the individual
action of the prolétaire, when he is made for
action in the mass.”
This vague philosophy and transcendental
ethics pass naturally enough, at times, into the feeling
of violent revolution, where bomb-throwing, if not
advocated, is emotionally sympathetic.
“Just now,” wrote Terry,
“there is strong predisposition among the ‘reds’
to resort to Russian methods. It needs only the
occasion, which must be waited for, and cannot be
created. When the ‘error’ is great
enough, the ‘Terror’ will surely rise to
the occasion. Were it not for my faith in this,
I should be glad to see Humanity lapse back to whence
it came.”
In the idealist there is a growing
impatience with the world; in his attempt to react
even against Nature and some of the necessary qualities
of men there is such inevitable failure that no moral
revolutionist or anarchist can indefinitely endure
the struggle. He is destroyed by his fundamental
opposition to the world which he seeks to destroy.
Therefore, impatiently, weakly, he sometimes breaks
out with a bomb even against
his philosophy and his temperament.
He is led into contradictions.
One of them touches upon his feeling of “class
consciousness.” Terry at times, as a transcendental
moralist, rises above this feeling, but his special
instinct as a “labour” man often asserts
itself against and in contradiction to his passion
for the oneness of the race. In my intimate association
with him I sometimes saw that, much as he liked me,
he felt that I was of another “class.”
In the work which resulted in my book, The Spirit
of Labour, I frequently came in discouraging contact
with this “class” distrust of me in
him and in others. Marie alone seemed free of
it, in her relation to me, and yet she wrote:
“I think we have a peculiar
sympathy for each other, and yet I realise that in
some subtle way there is not that perfect understanding
there ought to be. Just think of what extremes
we two come from how different our social
environment! I know you understand as nearly as
is possible for one of your class, and yet I doubt
if you can really sympathise with the ideas of anarchism
which springs naturally from only one class the
labour class. Do you not hesitate sometimes and
doubt that all men are worthy of the better things
of life, the coalheaver as well as the banker and
artist? Even I hesitate sometimes, when I see
the coarseness and ignorance of these poor plodders
of earth, and when I think of all the really great
things that slavery has accomplished. But who
knows how much greater things might be, if done freely
by free men? When I remember that these poor
plodders have never had a chance, I relent and feel
so sorry and so hopeless. How often Terry and
I have walked along the boulevards, admiring the beautiful
homes of the rich. Oh, it used to make me wild!
I felt that I belonged to humanity, and yet I could
only enter these beautiful homes as a servant, an object
of contempt an object of contempt supposed,
moreover, to have morals, and religion, too!”
Of “class consciousness,”
Terry wrote: “Class feeling has always been
a deep problem to me: it emanates from profound
depths. This reflection concerns you. Many
of your ‘labour’ friends here seem to regret
that there were many things they could not tell you;
not that they had any conscious lack of faith in you
as an individual; indeed, they had great faith in
you as a person. Their distrust of you was a class
distrust; they dreaded to betray the interests of
their class. They felt a fundamental antagonism,
not to you as an individual, but to you as a member
of your class. From their Social Sinai they enunciate
the eleventh commandment, ‘Thou shalt not be
a Scab!’, and the other ten commandments do
not seem to them so important. But you, they think,
cannot feel this commandment as they do, so passionately,
so fully. To them, it is the keynote of solidarity;
to you, partly at least, a principle of division,
of separation.
“No wonder our class the
thinkers among them rejects the morality
of your class property morality, and the
rest meant only to make property morality as strong
as a law of God. I made at one time the fatal
mistake of the many simple labourers who are organically
honest. I spent most of my best life in seeking
a solution of our hard lot from those above me.
After a loss of many feathers and some brave plumage,
but no down, I must in all humility beat my way back
to the traditional lost ideals of our organically
incorporated class.... Perhaps the most conscienceless
class who seek to solve the insoluble is the ‘cultured’
class. But most of them seem to me like artistic
undertakers officiating at the ‘wake’
of Life. With their platitudes, their prudery,
and their chastity, they make for death. These
languid ones desire to have life served up to them
in many courses. Greed lies at the bottom of their
being, and so they preach content to the masses, though
for the workers they have nothing in their shallow
souls but contempt. This cultured leisure class
has had the time and cunning to perpetrate one great
and tragic trick. They have made social falsehoods
so complicated that they themselves neither understand
nor wish to understand.... Why is it that in all
the great authors I detect an air of condescension,
marking their contempt for those who make and keep
them what they are? With what fine contempt the
‘rube’ is surveyed by the faker who has
plucked him! Must I put these classic souls of
art in the same category? The art for art’s
sake people these make me sick. It
is at best an argumentative confusion springing from
the fact that in the perfect work of art there is such
a fusion of form and substance as to resist dissociation
and defy analysis. Perhaps this fact accounts
for Tolstoi’s contempt for some of the classic
art. It seems to me that most classic art is one
of two things: either it smacks of smug content
and over-fed geniality or it is permeated with a profound
pessimism. The philosophers are worse than the
artists; they are the ringleaders of the betrayers
of humanity. Art at least makes the atonement
of beauty for its mistakes, but this cannot be said
of philosophy.
“Herbert Spencer, for instance,
who represents the high-water mark of a philosophy
that will not hold water, pours out the vials of his
bottled-up wrath on the poor unfortunates of London
who are compelled ‘to make a living’ by
tips in opening the carriage doors or holding the
horses of the wealthy. He had nothing but loathing
for the pregnant girl who tries to break her ‘fall’
by taking advantage of the ‘poor laws.’
For the workingman, who sincerely tries, at least,
to settle the ‘affairs of State’ in the
pot-house over a mug of ale, Spencer had nothing but
contempt; but to the parliamentary people who settle
the same ‘affairs’ over champagne and
prostitutes, he played the lick-spittle.... The
recantation of his ‘Social Statics’ is
the worst case of intellectual cowardice on record....
He went down with final contempt for the workers who
served him, gave him his daily bread, made his ink,
pen, and paper and bound the twenty volumes of his
philosophy of falsehood! May his ‘works’
rest in oblivion!...
“In dismissing Spencer, it is
worthy of note that the very thing which made him
pause in the righting of social wrongs is the thing
which will cause the Revolution, namely, the complicated
nature of social falsehoods. In recanting his
published truth on the land question, he admitted
that, although the legal title to land was obtained
by murder and dispossession of original occupants,
the matter was now too complicated to be dealt with.
If this be so, if justice cannot be done because of
the difficulties in the way, then all hail to the simplicity
and elemental justice of a Red Revolution!...
“Yes, sometimes I feel like
the crudest of the revolutionists, although I call
myself a philosophical anarchist. Sometimes the
jails seem to yearn for my reception, and I question
my right to be at large. Nothing but a decreasing
cowardice leaves me at liberty. And if I could
not do more for my soul behind the bars than I have
done in front of them, then I am fit only for durance
vile. I, who have out-fasted the very flies till
they fled my room, dread but one thing in the life
of a prison that I should have no time
for reflection and repose! but out of a born anarchist
it would make of me a compulsory Socialist, condemned
to work for the State a veritable dungeon
of disgrace.
“It is not so much that I love
life, though as a rule the poor, who are so close
to life, worship it in a way that puts all other things
to scorn. I know nothing that reaches farther
up or deeper down than this. It is only in the
gutter that life is truly worshipped. And that
is why I search for my last faith there in
the gutter, whence all faith really springs.
“And yet to have faith even
in the gutter is an act of deep imagination.
In the rotting rooms beneath me lives a worker with
a family of six girls and one boy. Capitalism
has crucified his carcass for fifty years and now
‘laid him off.’ He has been looking
for work for the last month. I watch the insanity
in his restless, aimless movements, and I feel desperate
enough to try to get him a job. Unfortunately,
he does not drink; so his pipe, ever in his mouth,
is the only obstacle between him and the mad-house,
or the poor-house. Every morning at six o’clock,
his sandwich dinner concealed in his pocket, he makes
a brave show of walking away briskly in his hopeless
search for work; for there are too many younger men.
His assumed activity is only put on till he turns the
first corner, for he tries to conceal his lameness
and decrepitude, especially from his wife, who strains
her gaze after him. Just before starting off
he takes the superfluous precaution to put some shoe-blacking
on his hair which shows white about the temples.
He comes back after a six hours’ search, about
noon, his neglected dinner still in his pocket.
He has tramped ten or twelve miles with no open shop
for him. He does not blame anyone, but regards
it all as an accident that has happened to him in
some unfortunate way. He broods over this till
I can see it in his eyes; but I don’t dare say
anything to him. He is too old, and I might only
make his trouble worse. If I were a sculptor I
would put him before the world in a material almost
as hard and I hope more enduring than itself.
His arms never hang down by his side, but seem to
be set in the position required by his last job, shovelling.
It reminds me of the time, thirty years ago, when
I was laid off, and the madness first got in and crouched
behind my eyes....
“Yes, I suppose I am mad.
It is true that if I cannot have the intellectual
red that heralds the approach of Dawn, then I want
the red light of Terror that ushers in the Night.
My feelings have been clamouring for many years against
my cowardly better judgment. I believe some day
they will break loose and throw me, as from a catapult,
even up against the stone wall of atrocity we call
Society.”
Thus the idealist becomes frenzied
at times at the incredible difficulties in the way
of a total revolt against society, even against nature.
We shall see how the absolute nature of his anarchism
led Terry further and further along the path of rejection,
“passing up” one thing after another,
even letting anarchism as a social enthusiasm go by
the board and making his continued relation with a
human being, even with Marie, a practical impossibility.