I do not accuse you of being a liar far
from it; on the contrary, I believe that if truth
and falsehood were distinctly placed before you, and
the opportunity of a deliberate choice afforded you,
you would rather expose yourself to serious injury
than submit to the guilt of falsehood. It is,
therefore, with the more regret that your conscientious
friends observe a daily-growing disregard of absolute
truth in your statement of indifferent things, and,
à plus forte raison, in your statement of your
own side of the question as opposed to that of another.
There are, unfortunately, a thousand opportunities
and temptations to the exaggerated mode of expression
for which I blame you; and these temptations are generally
of so trifling a nature, that the whole energies of
the conscience are never awakened to resist them,
as might be the case were the evil to others and the
disgrace to yourself more strikingly manifest.
Few people seem to be at all aware of the difficulties
that really attend speaking the exact truth,
or they would shrink from indulging in any habits
that immeasurably increase these difficulties, increase
it, indeed, to such a degree, that some minds appear
to have lost the very power of perceiving truth; so
that, even when they are extremely anxious to be correct
in their statement, there is a total incapacity of
transmitting a story to another in the way that they
themselves received it. This is one of the most
striking temporal punishments of sin, one
of those that are the inevitable consequences of the
sin itself, and quite independent of the other punishments
which the revealed will of God attaches to it.
The persons of whom I speak must sooner or later perceive
that no dependence is placed on their statements,
that even when respect and affection for their other
good qualities may prevent a clear recognition of the
falsehood of their character, yet that they are now
never applied to for information on any matters of
importance. Perhaps, to those who have any sensitiveness
of observation, such doubts are even the more painful
the more vaguely they are implied. For myself,
I have long acquired the habit of translating the
assertions and the stories of the persons of whom
I speak into the language in which I judge they originally
existed. By the aid of a small degree of ingenuity,
it is not very difficult to ascertain, from the nature
of the refracting medium, the degree and the direction
of the change that has taken place in the pure ray
of truth.
Yet such people as these often deserve
pity as much as blame: they are, perhaps, unconscious
of the degree in which habit has made them insensible
to the perversion of truth in their statements; and
even now they scarcely believe that what seems to
them so true should appear and really be false to
others. The intellectual effects of such habits
are equally injurious with the moral ones. All
natural clearness and distinctness of intellect becomes
gradually obscured; the memory becomes perplexed;
the very style of writing acquires the taint of the
perverted mind. Truth is impressed upon every
line of Dr. Arnold’s vigorous diction, while
other writers of equal, perhaps, but less respectable
eminence, betray, even in their mode of expression,
the habitual want of honesty in their character and
in their statements.
In your case, none of the habits of
which I have spoken are, as yet, firmly implanted.
A warm temper, ardent feelings, and a vivid imagination
are, as yet, the only causes of your errors. You
have still time and power to struggle against them,
as the chains of habit have not been added to those
of nature. But, before the struggle begins, you
must be convinced of its necessity; and this is probably
the point on which you are entirely incredulous.
Listen to me, then, while I help you to discover the
hidden mysteries of a heart that “is deceitful
above all things,” and let the self-examination
I urge upon you be prompt, be immediate. Let
it be exercised through the day that is coming; watch
the manner in which you express yourself on every
subject; observe, especially those temptations which
will assail you to venture upon greater deviations
from truth than those which you think you may harmlessly
indulge in, under the sanction of vivid imagination,
poetic fancy, &c. This latter part of the examination
may throw great light on the subject: people
are not assailed frequently and strongly by temptations
that have never, at any former time, been yielded to.
I have reason to believe that, as
one of the preparations for such self-examination,
you entertain a deep sense of the exceeding sinfulness
of sin, and feel an anxious desire to approve yourself
as a faithful servant to your heavenly Master.
I do not, therefore, suppose that at present any temptation
would induce you to incur the guilt of a deliberate
falsehood. The perception of moral evil may, however,
be so blunted by habits of mere carelessness, that
I should have no dependence on your adhering for many
future years to even this degree of plain, downright
truth, unless those habits are decidedly broken through.
But do not, from this, imagine that I consider a distinct,
decided falsehood more, but rather less, dangerous
for the future of your character than those lighter
errors of which I have spoken. Though you may
sink so far, in course of time, as to consider even
a direct lie a very small transgression of the law
of God, you will never be able to persuade yourself
that it is entirely free from sin. The injury,
too, to our neighbour, of a direct lie, can be so
much more easily guarded against, that, for the sake
of others, I am far more earnest in warning you against
equivocation than against decided falsehood. It
is sadly difficult for the injured person to ward
off the effects of a deceitful glance, a misleading
action, an artful insinuation. No earthly defence
is of any avail here, as the sorrows of many a wounded
heart can testify; but for such injured ones there
is a sure, though it may be a long-suffering, Defender.
He is the Judge of all the earth; and even in this
world he will visit, with a punishment inevitably involved
in the consequences of their crime, those who have
in any manner deceived their neighbour to his hurt.
I do not, however, accuse you of exaggerating
or equivocating from malice alone: no, more
frequently it is for the sake of mere amusement, or,
at the worst, in cowardly self-defence; that is, you
prefer throwing the blame by insinuation upon an innocent
person to bearing courageously what you deserve yourself.
In most cases, indeed, you can plead in excuse that
the blame is not of any serious nature; that the insinuated
accusation is slight enough to be entirely harmless:
so it may appear to you, but so it frequently happens
not to be. This insinuated accusation, appearing
to you so unimportant, may have some peculiar relations
that make it more injurious to the slandered one than
the original blame could have been to yourself.
It may be the means of separating her from her chief
friend, or shaking her influence in quarters where
perhaps it was of great importance to her that it should
be preserved unimpaired. When we lay sinful hands
on the complicated machinery of God’s providence,
it is impossible for us to see how far the derangement
may extend.
You may, during the course of this
coming day, have an opportunity of giving your own
version of a matter in which another was concerned
with you, and in which, if the blame is thrown on
her, she will have no opportunity of defending herself.
Be on your guard, then; have a noble courage; fear
nothing but the meanness and the wickedness of accusing
the absent and the defenceless. The opportunity
offered you to-day of speaking conscientiously, however
trifling it may in itself appear, may possibly be
the turning point of your life; may lead you on to
future habits of cowardice and deceit, or may impart
to you new vigilance and energy for future victories
over temptation.
You may, also, during the course of
this day, be strongly tempted as to the mode of repeating
what another has said in conversation: the slightest
turn in the expression of the sentence, the insertion
or omission of one little word, the change of a weaker
to a stronger expression, may exactly adapt to your
purpose the sentence you are tempted to repeat.
You may also often be able to say to yourself that
you are giving the impression of the real meaning of
the speaker, only withheld by herself because she
had not courage to express it. Opportunities
such as these are continually offering themselves to
you, and you have ingenuity enough to make the desired
change in the repeated sentence so effectual, that
there will be no danger of contradiction, even if
the betrayed person should discover that she is called
upon to defend herself. I have heard this so
cleverly done, that the success was complete, and
the poor slandered one lost, in consequence, her admirer
or her friend, or at least much of her influence over
them. You, too, may in like manner succeed:
but what is the loss of others in comparison of the
penalty of your success? The punishment of successful
sin is not to be escaped.
In any of the cases I here bring forward
as illustrations, as helps to your self-examination,
I am not supposing that there is any tangible, positive,
wilful deceit in your heart, or that you deliberately
contemplate any very serious injury being inflicted
on the persons whose conversations and actions you
misrepresent. On the contrary, I know that you
are not thus hardened in sin. With regard, however,
to the deceit not assuming any tangible form in your
own eyes, you ought to remember the solemn words,
“Thou, O God I seest me;” and what is sin
in his eyes can only fail to be so in ours from the
neglect of strict self-examination and prayer that
the Spirit of the Lord may search the very depths
of the heart. Sins of ignorance seem to assume
even a deeper dye than others, when the ignorance
only arises from wilful neglect of the means of knowledge
so abundantly and freely bestowed. When you once
begin in right earnest to try to speak the truth from
your heart, in the smallest as well as in the greatest
things, you will be surprised to find how difficult
it is. Carelessness, false shame, a desire for
admiration, a vanity that leads you to disclaim any
interest in that which you cannot obtain, these
are all temptations that beset your path, and ought
to terrify you against adding the chains of habit to
so many other difficulties.
There is one more point of view in
which I wish you to consider this subject; that, namely,
of “honesty being the best policy.”
There is no falsehood that is not found out in the
end, and so turned to the shame of the person who
is guilty of it. You may perpetually dread, even
at present, the eye of the discriminating observer;
she can see through you, even at the very moment of
your committal of sin; she quickly discovers that
it is your habit to depreciate people or things, only
because you are not in your turn valued by them, or
because you cannot obtain them; she can see, in a
few minutes’ conversation, that it is your habit
to say that you are admired and loved, that your society
is eagerly sought for by such and such people, whether
it be the case or not. Quick observers discover
in a first interview what others will not fail to
discover after a time. They will then cease to
depend upon you for information on any subject in
which your own interest or your vanity is concerned.
They will turn up their eyes in wonder, from habit
and politeness, not from belief. They will always
suspect some hidden motive for your words, instead
of the one you put forward; nay, your giving one reason
for your actions will, by itself alone, set them on
the search to discover a different one. All this,
perhaps, will in many cases take place without their
accusing you, even in their secret thoughts, of being
a liar. They have only a vague consciousness that
you are, it may be involuntarily, quite incapable
of giving correct information.
The habitual, the known truth-speaker,
occupies a proud position. Alas! that it should
be so rare. Alas! that, even among professedly
religious people, there should be so few who speak
the truth from the heart; so few to whom one can turn
with a fearless confidence to ask for information
on any points of personal interest. I need not
to be told that it is during childhood that the formation
of strict habits of truthfulness is at once most sure
and most easy. The difficulty is indeed increased
ten thousandfold, when the neglect of parents has
suffered even careless habits on this point to be contracted.
The difficulties, however, though great, are not insuperable
to those who seek the freely-offered grace of God
to help them in the conflict. The resistance
to temptation, the self-control, will indeed be more
difficult when the effort begins later in life; but
the victory will be also the more glorious, and the
general effects on the character more permanent and
beneficial. Not that this serves as any excuse
for the cruel neglect of parents, for they can have
no certainty that future repentance will be granted
for those habits of sin, the formation of which they
might have prevented.
Dwelling, however, even in thought,
on the neglect of our parents can only lead to vain
murmurings and complainings, and prevent the concentration
of all our energies and interest upon the extirpation
of the dangerous root of evil.
In this case, as in all others, though
the sin of the parent is surely visited on the children,
the very visitation is turned into a blessing for
those who love God. To such blessed ones it becomes
the means of imparting greater strength and vigour
to the character, from the perpetual conflicts to
which it is exposed in its efforts to overcome early
habits of evil.
Thus even sin itself is not excepted from the all things that work
together for good to them that love God."