At length, after a long pause, he began to talk.
“Queer thing,” he added
in a hurried sort of voice, as though he wanted to
say something and get it over. “Queer thing.
I mean, about that otter last night.”
I had expected something so totally
different that he caught me with surprise, and I looked
up sharply.
“Shows how lonely this place
is. Otters are awfully shy things ”
“I don’t mean that, of
course,” he interrupted. “I mean do
you think did you think it really was an
otter?”
“What else, in the name of Heaven, what else?”
“You know, I saw it before you
did, and at first it seemed so much bigger
than an otter.”
“The sunset as you looked up-stream
magnified it, or something,” I replied.
He looked at me absently a moment,
as though his mind were busy with other thoughts.
“It had such extraordinary yellow
eyes,” he went on half to himself.
“That was the sun too,”
I laughed, a trifle boisterously. “I suppose
you’ll wonder next if that fellow in the boat ”
I suddenly decided not to finish the
sentence. He was in the act again of listening,
turning his head to the wind, and something in the
expression of his face made me halt. The subject
dropped, and we went on with our caulking. Apparently
he had not noticed my unfinished sentence. Five
minutes later, however, he looked at me across the
canoe, the smoking pitch in his hand, his face exceedingly
grave.
“I did rather wonder, if you
want to know,” he said slowly, “what that
thing in the boat was. I remember thinking at
the time it was not a man. The whole business
seemed to rise quite suddenly out of the water.”
I laughed again boisterously in his
face, but this time there was impatience, and a strain
of anger too, in my feeling.
“Look here now,” I cried,
“this place is quite queer enough without going
out of our way to imagine things! That boat was
an ordinary boat, and the man in it was an ordinary
man, and they were both going down-stream as fast
as they could lick. And that otter was an otter,
so don’t let’s play the fool about it!”
He looked steadily at me with the
same grave expression. He was not in the least
annoyed. I took courage from his silence.
“And, for Heaven’s sake,”
I went on, “don’t keep pretending you hear
things, because it only gives me the jumps, and there’s
nothing to hear but the river and this cursed old
thundering wind.”
“You fool!” he answered
in a low, shocked voice, “you utter fool.
That’s just the way all victims talk. As
if you didn’t understand just as well as I do!”
he sneered with scorn in his voice, and a sort of resignation.
“The best thing you can do is to keep quiet
and try to hold your mind as firm as possible.
This feeble attempt at self-deception only makes the
truth harder when you’re forced to meet it.”
My little effort was over, and I found
nothing more to say, for I knew quite well his words
were true, and that I was the fool, not he. Up
to a certain stage in the adventure he kept ahead
of me easily, and I think I felt annoyed to be out
of it, to be thus proved less psychic, less sensitive
than himself to these extraordinary happenings, and
half ignorant all the time of what was going on under
my very nose. He knew from the very beginning,
apparently. But at the moment I wholly missed
the point of his words about the necessity of there
being a victim, and that we ourselves were destined
to satisfy the want. I dropped all pretence thenceforward,
but thenceforward likewise my fear increased steadily
to the climax.
“But you’re quite right
about one thing,” he added, before the subject
passed, “and that is that we’re wiser not
to talk about it, or even to think about it, because
what one thinks finds expression in words, and what
one says, happens.”
That afternoon, while the canoe dried
and hardened, we spent trying to fish, testing the
leak, collecting wood, and watching the enormous flood
of rising water. Masses of driftwood swept near
our shores sometimes, and we fished for them with
long willow branches. The island grew perceptibly
smaller as the banks were torn away with great gulps
and splashes. The weather kept brilliantly fine
till about four o’clock, and then for the first
time for three days the wind showed signs of abating.
Clouds began to gather in the south-west, spreading
thence slowly over the sky.
This lessening of the wind came as
a great relief, for the incessant roaring, banging,
and thundering had irritated our nerves. Yet the
silence that came about five o’clock with its
sudden cessation was in a manner quite as oppressive.
The booming of the river had everything in its own
way then; it filled the air with deep murmurs, more
musical than the wind noises, but infinitely more
monotonous. The wind held many notes, rising,
falling always beating out some sort of great elemental
tune; whereas the river’s song lay between three
notes at most dull pedal notes, that held
a lugubrious quality foreign to the wind, and somehow
seemed to me, in my then nervous state, to sound wonderfully
well the music of doom.
It was extraordinary, too, how the
withdrawal suddenly of bright sunlight took everything
out of the landscape that made for cheerfulness; and
since this particular landscape had already managed
to convey the suggestion of something sinister, the
change of course was all the more unwelcome and noticeable.
For me, I know, the darkening outlook became distinctly
more alarming, and I found myself more than once calculating
how soon after sunset the full moon would get up in
the east, and whether the gathering clouds would greatly
interfere with her lighting of the little island.
With this general hush of the wind though
it still indulged in occasional brief gusts the
river seemed to me to grow blacker, the willows to
stand more densely together. The latter, too,
kept up a sort of independent movement of their own,
rustling among themselves when no wind stirred, and
shaking oddly from the roots upwards. When common
objects in this way be come charged with the suggestion
of horror, they stimulate the imagination far more
than things of unusual appearance; and these bushes,
crowding huddled about us, assumed for me in the darkness
a bizarre grotesquerie of appearance that lent to
them somehow the aspect of purposeful and living creatures.
Their very ordinariness, I felt, masked what was malignant
and hostile to us. The forces of the region drew
nearer with the coming of night. They were focusing
upon our island, and more particularly upon ourselves.
For thus, somehow, in the terms of the imagination,
did my really indescribable sensations in this extraordinary
place present themselves.
I had slept a good deal in the early
afternoon, and had thus recovered somewhat from the
exhaustion of a disturbed night, but this only served
apparently to render me more susceptible than before
to the obsessing spell of the haunting. I fought
against it, laughing at my feelings as absurd and
childish, with very obvious physiological explanations,
yet, in spite of every effort, they gained in strength
upon me so that I dreaded the night as a child lost
in a forest must dread the approach of darkness.
The canoe we had carefully covered
with a waterproof sheet during the day, and the one
remaining paddle had been securely tied by the Swede
to the base of a tree, lest the wind should rob us
of that too. From five o’clock onwards
I busied myself with the stew-pot and preparations
for dinner, it being my turn to cook that night.
We had potatoes, onions, bits of bacon fat to add
flavor, and a general thick residue from former stews
at the bottom of the pot; with black bread broken
up into it the result was most excellent, and it was
followed by a stew of plums with sugar and a brew of
strong tea with dried milk. A good pile of wood
lay close at hand, and the absence of wind made my
duties easy. My companion sat lazily watching
me, dividing his attentions between cleaning his pipe
and giving useless advice an admitted privilege
of the off-duty man. He had been very quiet all
the afternoon, engaged in re-caulking the canoe, strengthening
the tent ropes, and fishing for driftwood while I
slept. No more talk about undesirable things
had passed between us, and I think his only remarks
had to do with the gradual destruction of the island,
which he declared was not fully a third smaller than
when we first landed.
The pot had just begun to bubble when
I heard his voice calling to me from the bank, where
he had wandered away without my noticing. I ran
up.
“Come and listen,” he
said, “and see what you make of it.”
He held his hand cupwise to his ear, as so often before.
“Now do you hear anything?” he asked,
watching me curiously.
We stood there, listening attentively
together. At first I heard only the deep note
of the water and the hissings rising from its turbulent
surface. The willows, for once, were motionless
and silent. Then a sound began to reach my ears
faintly, a peculiar sound something like
the humming of a distant gong. It seemed to come
across to us in the darkness from the waste of swamps
and willows opposite. It was repeated at regular
intervals, but it was certainly neither the sound
of a bell nor the hooting of a distant steamer.
I can liken it to nothing so much as to the sound of
an immense gong, suspended far up in the sky, repeating
incessantly its muffled metallic note, soft and musical,
as it was repeatedly struck. My heart quickened
as I listened.
“I’ve heard it all day,”
said my companion. “While you slept this
afternoon it came all round the island. I hunted
it down, but could never get near enough to see to
localize it correctly. Sometimes it was overhead,
and sometimes it seemed under the water. Once
or twice, too, I could have sworn it was not outside
at all, but within myself you know the
way a sound in the fourth dimension is supposed to
come.”
I was too much puzzled to pay much
attention to his words. I listened carefully,
striving to associate it with any known familiar sound
I could think of, but without success. It changed
in the direction, too, coming nearer, and then sinking
utterly away into remote distance. I cannot say
that it was ominous in quality, because to me it seemed
distinctly musical, yet I must admit it set going
a distressing feeling that made me wish I had never
heard it.
“The wind blowing in those sand-funnels,”
I said determined to find an explanation, “or
the bushes rubbing together after the storm perhaps.”
“It comes off the whole swamp,”
my friend answered. “It comes from everywhere
at once.” He ignored my explanations.
“It comes from the willow bushes somehow ”
“But now the wind has dropped,”
I objected. “The willows can hardly make
a noise by themselves, can they?”
His answer frightened me, first because
I had dreaded it, and secondly, because I knew intuitively
it was true.
“It is because the wind has
dropped we now hear it. It was drowned before.
It is the cry, I believe, of the ”
I dashed back to my fire, warned by
the sound of bubbling that the stew was in danger,
but determined at the same time to escape further conversation.
I was resolute, if possible, to avoid the exchanging
of views. I dreaded, too, that he would begin
about the gods, or the elemental forces, or something
else disquieting, and I wanted to keep myself well
in hand for what might happen later. There was
another night to be faced before we escaped from this
distressing place, and there was no knowing yet what
it might bring forth.
“Come and cut up bread for the
pot,” I called to him, vigorously stirring the
appetizing mixture. That stew-pot held sanity
for us both, and the thought made me laugh.
He came over slowly and took the provision
sack from the tree, fumbling in its mysterious depths,
and then emptying the entire contents upon the ground-sheet
at his feet.
“Hurry up!” I cried; “it’s
boiling.”
The Swede burst out into a roar of
laughter that startled me. It was forced laughter,
not artificial exactly, but mirthless.
“There’s nothing here!” he shouted,
holding his sides.
“Bread, I mean.”
“It’s gone. There is no bread.
They’ve taken it!”
I dropped the long spoon and ran up.
Everything the sack had contained lay upon the ground-sheet,
but there was no loaf.
The whole dead weight of my growing
fear fell upon me and shook me. Then I burst
out laughing too. It was the only thing to do:
and the sound of my laughter also made me understand
his. The stain of psychical pressure caused it this
explosion of unnatural laughter in both of us; it was
an effort of repressed forces to seek relief; it was
a temporary safety-valve. And with both of us
it ceased quite suddenly.
“How criminally stupid of me!”
I cried, still determined to be consistent and find
an explanation. “I clean forgot to buy a
loaf at Pressburg. That chattering woman put
everything out of my head, and I must have left it
lying on the counter or ”
“The oatmeal, too, is much less
than it was this morning,” the Swede interrupted.
Why in the world need he draw attention
to it? I thought angrily.
“There’s enough for tomorrow,”
I said, stirring vigorously, “and we can get
lots more at Komorn or Gran. In twenty-four hours
we shall be miles from here.”
“I hope so to God,”
he muttered, putting the things back into the sack,
“unless we’re claimed first as victims
for the sacrifice,” he added with a foolish
laugh. He dragged the sack into the tent, for
safety’s sake, I suppose, and I heard him mumbling
to himself, but so indistinctly that it seemed quite
natural for me to ignore his words.
Our meal was beyond question a gloomy
one, and we ate it almost in silence, avoiding one
another’s eyes, and keeping the fire bright.
Then we washed up and prepared for the night, and,
once smoking, our minds unoccupied with any definite
duties, the apprehension I had felt all day long became
more and more acute. It was not then active fear,
I think, but the very vagueness of its origin distressed
me far more that if I had been able to ticket and
face it squarely. The curious sound I have likened
to the note of a gong became now almost incessant,
and filled the stillness of the night with a faint,
continuous ringing rather than a series of distinct
notes. At one time it was behind and at another
time in front of us. Sometimes I fancied it came
from the bushes on our left, and then again from the
clumps on our right. More often it hovered directly
overhead like the whirring of wings. It was really
everywhere at once, behind, in front, at our sides
and over our heads, completely surrounding us.
The sound really defies description. But nothing
within my knowledge is like that ceaseless muffled
humming rising off the deserted world of swamps and
willows.
We sat smoking in comparative silence,
the strain growing every minute greater. The
worst feature of the situation seemed to me that we
did not know what to expect, and could therefore make
no sort of preparation by way of defense. We
could anticipate nothing. My explanations made
in the sunshine, moreover, now came to haunt me with
their foolish and wholly unsatisfactory nature, and
it was more and more clear to us that some kind of
plain talk with my companion was inevitable, whether
I liked it or not. After all, we had to spend
the night together, and to sleep in the same tent
side by side. I saw that I could not get along
much longer without the support of his mind, and for
that, of course, plain talk was imperative. As
long as possible, however, I postponed this little
climax, and tried to ignore or laugh at the occasional
sentences he flung into the emptiness.
Some of these sentences, moreover,
were confoundedly disquieting to me, coming as they
did to corroborate much that I felt myself; corroboration,
too which made it so much more convincing from
a totally different point of view. He composed
such curious sentences, and hurled them at me in such
an inconsequential sort of way, as though his main
line of thought was secret to himself, and these fragments
were mere bits he found it impossible to digest.
He got rid of them by uttering them. Speech relieved
him. It was like being sick.
“There are things about us,
I’m sure, that make for disorder, disintegration,
destruction, our destruction,” he said once,
while the fire blazed between us. “We’ve
strayed out of a safe line somewhere.”
And, another time, when the gong sounds
had come nearer, ringing much louder than before,
and directly over our heads, he said as though talking
to himself:
“I don’t think a gramophone
would show any record of that. The sound doesn’t
come to me by the ears at all. The vibrations
reach me in another manner altogether, and seem to
be within me, which is precisely how a fourth dimensional
sound might be supposed to make itself heard.”
I purposely made no reply to this,
but I sat up a little closer to the fire and peered
about me into the darkness. The clouds were massed
all over the sky, and no trace of moonlight came through.
Very still, too, everything was, so that the river
and the frogs had things all their own way.
“It has that about it,”
he went on, “which is utterly out of common
experience. It is unknown. Only one thing
describes it really; it is a non-human sound; I mean
a sound outside humanity.”
Having rid himself of this indigestible
morsel, he lay quiet for a time, but he had so admirably
expressed my own feeling that it was a relief to have
the thought out, and to have confined it by the limitation
of words from dangerous wandering to and fro in the
mind.
The solitude of that Danube camping-place,
can I ever forget it? The feeling of being utterly
alone on an empty planet! My thoughts ran incessantly
upon cities and the haunts of men. I would have
given my soul, as the saying is, for the “feel”
of those Bavarian villages we had passed through by
the score; for the normal, human commonplaces; peasants
drinking beer, tables beneath the trees, hot sunshine,
and a ruined castle on the rocks behind the red-roofed
church. Even the tourists would have been welcome.
Yet what I felt of dread was no ordinary
ghostly fear. It was infinitely greater, stranger,
and seemed to arise from some dim ancestral sense of
terror more profoundly disturbing than anything I had
known or dreamed of. We had “strayed,”
as the Swede put it, into some region or some set of
conditions where the risks were great, yet unintelligible
to us; where the frontiers of some unknown world lay
close about us. It was a spot held by the dwellers
in some outer space, a sort of peep-hole whence they
could spy upon the earth, themselves unseen, a point
where the veil between had worn a little thin.
As the final result of too long a sojourn here, we
should be carried over the border and deprived of
what we called “our lives,” yet by mental,
not physical, processes. In that sense, as he
said, we should be the victims of our adventure a
sacrifice.
It took us in different fashion, each
according to the measure of his sensitiveness and
powers of resistance. I translated it vaguely
into a personification of the mightily disturbed elements,
investing them with the horror of a deliberate and
malefic purpose, resentful of our audacious intrusion
into their breeding-place; whereas my friend threw
it into the unoriginal form at first of a trespass
on some ancient shrine, some place where the old gods
still held sway, where the emotional forces of former
worshippers still clung, and the ancestral portion
of him yielded to the old pagan spell.
At any rate, here was a place unpolluted
by men, kept clean by the winds from coarsening human
influences, a place where spiritual agencies were
within reach and aggressive. Never, before or
since, have I been so attacked by indescribable suggestions
of a “beyond region,” of another scheme
of life, another revolution not parallel to the human.
And in the end our minds would succumb under the weight
of the awful spell, and we should be drawn across
the frontier into their world.
Small things testified to the amazing
influence of the place, and now in the silence round
the fire they allowed themselves to be noted by the
mind. The very atmosphere had proved itself a
magnifying medium to distort every indication:
the otter rolling in the current, the hurrying boatman
making signs, the shifting willows, one and all had
been robbed of its natural character, and revealed
in something of its other aspect as it existed
across the border to that other region. And this
changed aspect I felt was now not merely to me, but
to the race. The whole experience whose verge
we touched was unknown to humanity at all. It
was a new order of experience, and in the true sense
of the word unearthly.
“It’s the deliberate,
calculating purpose that reduces one’s courage
to zero,” the Swede said suddenly, as if he
had been actually following my thoughts. “Otherwise
imagination might count for much. But the paddle,
the canoe, the lessening food ”
“Haven’t I explained all
that once?” I interrupted viciously.
“You have,” he answered dryly; “you
have indeed.”
He made other remarks too, as usual,
about what he called the “plain determination
to provide a victim”; but, having now arranged
my thoughts better, I recognized that this was simply
the cry of his frightened soul against the knowledge
that he was being attacked in a vital part, and that
he would be somehow taken or destroyed. The situation
called for a courage and calmness of reasoning that
neither of us could compass, and I have never before
been so clearly conscious of two persons in me the
one that explained everything, and the other that
laughed at such foolish explanations, yet was horribly
afraid.
Meanwhile, in the pitchy night the
fire died down and the wood pile grew small.
Neither of us moved to replenish the stock, and the
darkness consequently came up very close to our faces.
A few feet beyond the circle of firelight it was inky
black. Occasionally a stray puff of wind set the
willows shivering about us, but apart from this not
very welcome sound a deep and depressing silence reigned,
broken only by the gurgling of the river and the humming
in the air overhead.
We both missed, I think, the shouting company of the
winds.
At length, at a moment when a stray
puff prolonged itself as though the wind were about
to rise again, I reached the point for me of saturation,
the point where it was absolutely necessary to find
relief in plain speech, or else to betray myself by
some hysterical extravagance that must have been far
worse in its effect upon both of us. I kicked
the fire into a blaze, and turned to my companion
abruptly. He looked up with a start.
“I can’t disguise it any
longer,” I said; “I don’t like this
place, and the darkness, and the noises, and the awful
feelings I get. There’s something here
that beats me utterly. I’m in a blue funk,
and that’s the plain truth. If the other
shore was different, I swear I’d be
inclined to swim for it!”
The Swede’s face turned very
white beneath the deep tan of sun and wind. He
stared straight at me and answered quietly, but his
voice betrayed his huge excitement by its unnatural
calmness. For the moment, at any rate, he was
the strong man of the two. He was more phlegmatic,
for one thing.
“It’s not a physical condition
we can escape from by running away,” he replied,
in the tone of a doctor diagnosing some grave disease;
“we must sit tight and wait. There are
forces close here that could kill a herd of elephants
in a second as easily as you or I could squash a fly.
Our only chance is to keep perfectly still. Our
insignificance perhaps may save us.”
I put a dozen questions into my expression
of face, but found no words. It was precisely
like listening to an accurate description of a disease
whose symptoms had puzzled me.
“I mean that so far, although
aware of our disturbing presence, they have not found
us not ‘located’ us, as the
Americans say,” he went on. “They’re
blundering about like men hunting for a leak of gas.
The paddle and canoe and provisions prove that.
I think they feel us, but cannot actually see us.
We must keep our minds quiet it’s
our minds they feel. We must control our thoughts,
or it’s all up with us.”
“Death, you mean?” I stammered,
icy with the horror of his suggestion.
“Worse by far,”
he said. “Death, according to one’s
belief, means either annihilation or release from
the limitations of the senses, but it involves no
change of character. You don’t suddenly
alter just because the body’s gone. But
this means a radical alteration, a complete change,
a horrible loss of oneself by substitution far
worse than death, and not even annihilation.
We happen to have camped in a spot where their region
touches ours, where the veil between has worn thin” horrors!
he was using my very own phrase, my actual words “so
that they are aware of our being in their neighborhood.”
“But who are aware?” I asked.
I forgot the shaking of the willows
in the windless calm, the humming overhead, everything
except that I was waiting for an answer that I dreaded
more than I can possibly explain.
He lowered his voice at once to reply,
leaning forward a little over the fire, an indefinable
change in his face that made me avoid his eyes and
look down upon the ground.
“All my life,” he said,
“I have been strangely, vividly conscious of
another region not far removed from our
own world in one sense, yet wholly different in kind where
great things go on unceasingly, where immense and
terrible personalities hurry by, intent on vast purposes
compared to which earthly affairs, the rise and fall
of nations, the destinies of empires, the fate of
armies and continents, are all as dust in the balance;
vast purposes, I mean, that deal directly with the
soul, and not indirectly with more expressions of
the soul ”
“I suggest just now ”
I began, seeking to stop him, feeling as though I
was face to face with a madman. But he instantly
overbore me with his torrent that had to come.
“You think,” he said,
“it is the spirit of the elements, and I thought
perhaps it was the old gods. But I tell you now
it is neither. These would be comprehensible
entities, for they have relations with men, depending
upon them for worship or sacrifice, whereas these beings
who are now about us have absolutely nothing to do
with mankind, and it is mere chance that their space
happens just at this spot to touch our own.”
The mere conception, which his words
somehow made so convincing, as I listened to them
there in the dark stillness of that lonely island,
set me shaking a little all over. I found it
impossible to control my movements.
“And what do you propose?” I began again.
“A sacrifice, a victim, might
save us by distracting them until we could get away,”
he went on, “just as the wolves stop to devour
the dogs and give the sleigh another start. But I
see no chance of any other victim now.”
I stared blankly at him. The
gleam in his eye was dreadful. Presently he continued.