Susan Clegg and Mrs. Lathrop were
next-door neighbors and bosom friends. Their
personalities were extremely congenial, and the theoretical
relation which the younger woman bore to the elder
was a further bond between them. Owing to the
death of her mother some twenty years before, Susan
had fallen into the position of a helpless and timid
young girl whose only key to the problems of life in
general had been the advice of her older and wiser
neighbor. As a matter of fact Mrs. Lathrop was
barely twelve years the senior, but she had married
and as a consequence felt and was felt to be immeasurably
the more ancient of the two.
Susan had never married, for her father-a
bedridden paralytic-had occupied her time
day and night for years. He was a great care and
as she did her duty by him with a thoroughness which
was praiseworthy in the extreme she naturally had
very little leisure for society. Mrs. Lathrop
had more, because her family consisted of but one son,
and she was not given to that species of housekeeping
which sweeps under the beds too often. It therefore
came about that the one and only recreation which
the friends could enjoy together to any great extent
was visiting over the fence. Visiting over the
fence is an occupation in which any woman may indulge
without fear of unkind criticism. If she takes
occasion to run in next door, she is of course leaving
the house which she ought to be keeping, but she can
lean on the fence all day without feeling derelict
as to a single duty. Then, too, there is something
about the situation which produces a species of agreeable
subconsciousness that one is at once at home and abroad.
It followed that Susan and Mrs. Lathrop each wore
a path from her kitchen door to the trysting-spot,
and that all summer long they met there early and
late.
Mrs. Lathrop did the listening while
she chewed clover. Just beyond her woodpile red
clover grew luxuriantly, and when she started for the
place of meeting it was her invariable custom to stop
and pull a number of blossoms so that she might eat
the tender petals while devoting her attention to
the business in hand.
It must be confessed that the business
in hand was nearly always Miss Clegg’s business,
but since Mrs. Lathrop, in her position of experienced
adviser, was deeply interested in Susan’s exposition
of her own affairs, that trifling circumstance appeared
of little moment.
One of the main topics of conversation
was Mr. Clegg. As Mr. Clegg had not quitted his
bed for over a score of years, it might seem that his
novelty as a subject of discussion would have been
long since exhausted. But not so. His daughter
was the most devoted of daughters, and his name was
ever rife on her lips. What he required done for
him and what he required done to him were the main
ends of her existence, and the demands of his comfort,
daily or annual, resulted in numerous phrases of a
startling but thoroughly intelligible order. Of
such a sort was her usual Saturday morning greeting
to Mrs. Lathrop, “I ’m sorry to cut you
off so quick, but this ’s father’s day
to be beat up and got into new pillow-slips,”
or her regular early-June remark, “Well, I thank
Heaven ’t father ’s had his hair picked
over ‘n’ ’t he’s got his new
tick for this year!”
Mrs. Lathrop was always interested,
always sympathetic, and rarely ever startled; yet
one July evening when Susan said suddenly, “I
’ve finished my dress for father’s
funeral,” she did betray a slight shock.
“You ought to see it,”
the younger woman continued, not noticing the other’s
start,-“it’s jus’ ’s
nice. I put it away in camphor balls,
‘n’ Lord knows I don’t look forward
to the gettin’ it out to wear, f’r the
whole carriage load ’ll sneeze their heads off
whenever I move in that dress.”
“Did you put newspaper-”
Mrs. Lathrop began, mastering her earlier emotions.
“In the sleeves? Yes, I
did, ‘n’ I bought a pair o’ black
gloves ‘n’ two handkerchiefs ‘n’
slipped ’em into the pockets. Everythin’
is all fixed, ‘n’ there ‘ll be nothin’
to do when father dies but to shake it out ‘n’
lay it on the bed in his room. I say ‘in
his room,’ ‘cause o’ course that
day he ‘ll be havin’ the guest-room.
I was thinkin’ of it all this afternoon when
I sat there by him hemmin’ the braid on the
skirt, ‘n’ I could n’t but think
’t if I sit ‘n’ wait very much longer
I sh’ll suddenly find myself pretty far advanced
in years afore I know it. This world’s
made f’r the young ’s well’s the
old, ‘n’ you c’n believe me or not
jus’ ’s you please, Mrs. Lathrop, but I
’ve always meant to get married ’s
soon ’s father was off my hands. I was
countin’ up to-day, though, ‘n’ if
he lives to be a hunderd, I ’ll be nigh onto
seventy ‘n’ no man ain’t goin’
to marry me at seventy. Not ’nless he was
eighty, ‘n’ Lord knows I ain’t intendin’
to bury father jus’ to begin on some one else,
‘n’ that’s all it ’d be.”
Mrs. Lathrop chewed her clover.
“I set there thinkin’
f’r a good hour, ‘n’ when I was puttin’
away the dress, I kep’ on thinkin’, ‘n’
the end was ’t now that dress ’s done I
ain’t got nothin’ in especial to sew on
‘n’ so I may jus’ ’s well
begin on my weddin’ things. There’s
no time like the present, ‘n’ ’f
I married this summer he ’d have to pay
f’r half of next winter’s coal. ‘N’
so my mind’s made up, ‘n’ you c’n
talk yourself blind, ’f you feel so inclined,
Mrs. Lathrop, but you can’t change hide or hair
o’ my way o’ thinkin’. I ’ve
made up my mind to get married, ‘n’
I ’m goin’ to set right about it.
Where there’s a will there ’s a way, ‘n’
I ain’t goin’ to leave a stone unturned.
I went down town with the kerosene-can jus’
afore tea, ‘n’ I bought me a new false
front, ‘n’ I met Mrs. Brown’s son,
‘n’ I told him ’t I wanted him to
come up to-morrow ‘n’ take a look at father.”
“Was you thinkin’ o’
marryin’ Mrs. Br -”
Mrs. Lathrop gasped, taking her clover from her lips.
“Marryin’ Mrs. Brown’s
son! Well, ’f your mind don’t run
queer ways! Whatever sh’d put such an idea
into your head? I hope you ’ll excuse my
sayin’ so, Mrs. Lathrop, but I don’t believe
anybody but you would ever ‘a’ asked such
a question, when you know ’s well ’s everybody
else does ‘t he’s runnin’ his legs
off after Amelia Fitch. Any man who wants a little
chit o’ eighteen wouldn’t suit my taste
much, ‘n’ anyhow I never thought of him;
I only asked him to come in in a friendly way ‘n’
tell me how long he thinks ’t father may live.
I don’t see my way to makin’ any sort
o’ plans with father so dreffle indefinite,
‘n’ a man who was fool enough to marry
me, tied up like I am now, would n’t have s’fficient
brains to be worth lookin’ over. Mrs. Brown’s
son ‘s learnin’ docterin’, ‘n’
he’s been at it long enough so ‘s to be
able to see through anythin’ ’s simple
’s father, I sh’d think. ’T
any rate, ‘f he don’t know nothin’
yet, Heaven help Amelia Fitch ‘n’ me,
f’r he’ll take us both in.”
“Who was you thinkin’
o’-” Mrs. Lathrop asked, resuming
her former occupation.
“The minister,” replied
Miss Clegg. “I did n’t stop to consider
very much, but it struck me ’s polite to begin
with him. I c’d marry him without waitin’
for father, too, ’cause a minister could n’t
in reason find fault over another man’s bein’
always to home. O’ course he would n’t
be still like father is, but I ain’t never been
one to look gift-horses in the mouth, ‘n’
I d’n’ know ’s I ’d ought to
expect another man jus’ like father in
one life. Mother often said father’s advantages
was great, for you always knew where he was, ‘n’
’f you drew down the shade you c’d tell
him it was rainin’ ‘n’ he could n’t
never contradick.”
Mrs. Lathrop nodded acquiescently but made no comment.
Miss Clegg withdrew somewhat from
her confidentially inclined attitude.
“I won’t be out in the
mornin’,” she said. “I sh’ll
want to dust father ‘n’ turn him out o’
the window afore Mrs. Brown’s son comes.
After he’s gone I’ll wave my dish-towel,
‘n’ then you come out ‘n’ I
’ll tell you what he says.”
They separated for the night, and
Susan went to sleep with her own version of love’s
young dream.
Mrs. Brown’s son arrived quite
promptly the next morning. He drove up in Mr.
Brown’s buggy, and Amelia Fitch held the horse
while he went inside to inspect Mr. Clegg. The
visit did not consume more than ten minutes, and then
he hurried out to the gate and was off.
The buggy was hardly out of sight
up the road when Miss Clegg emerged from her kitchen
door, her face bearing an imprint of deep and thorough
disgust.
“Well, Mrs. Lathrop, I don’t
think much o’ that young man,” she
announced in a tone of unmitigated disapproval; “’peared
to me like he was in a hurry to get done with father
’s quick ’s he could just so ’s
to be back beside Amelia Fitch. I ’d venture
a guess that ’f you was to ask him this minute
he ’s forgot every word I said to him already.
I asked him to set some sort of a figger on father,
‘n’ he would n’t so much ’s
set down himself. Stood on one leg ‘n’
backed towards the door every other word, ‘n’
me, father’s only child, standin’ there
at his mercy. Said ’t last ’s he
might die to-morrow ‘n’ might
live twenty years. I tell you my patience pretty
near went at that. I don’t call such a
answer no answer a tall. I ’ve
often thought both them things myself, ‘n’
me no doctor. Particularly about the twenty years.
Father’s lived seventy-five years-I
must say ‘t to my order o’ thinkin’
he’s pretty well set a-goin’, ‘n’
that the life he leads ain’t drainin’
his vitality near ’s much ‘s it’s
drainin’ mine.”
Miss Clegg stopped and shook her head impatiently.
“I d’n’ know when
I ’ve felt as put out ’s this.
‘N’ me with so much faith in doctors too.
It’s a pretty sad thing, Mrs. Lathrop, when all
the comfort you c’n get out of a man is the thinkin’
’t perhaps God in his mercy has made him a fool.
I had a good mind to tell that very thing to Mrs.
Brown’s son, but I thought maybe he’d learn
better later. Anyway I ‘m goin’ right
ahead with my marriage. It’ll have to be
the minister now, ‘n’ I can’t see
what I ’ve ever done ’t I sh’d
have two men around the house ’t once like they
’ll be, but that’s all in the hands o’
Fate, ‘n’ so I jus’ took the first
step ‘n’ told Billy when he brought the
milk to tell his father ’t if he ’d come
up here to-night I ’d give him a quarter for
the Mission fund. I know the quarter ’ll
bring him, ‘n’ I can’t help kind
o’ hopin’ ’t to-morrow ’ll
find the whole thing settled ‘n’ off my
mind.”
The next morning Mrs. Lathrop laid
in an unusually large supply of fodder and was very
early at the fence. Her son-a placid
little innocent of nine-and-twenty years-was
still in bed and asleep. Susan was up and washing
her breakfast dishes, but the instant that she spied
her friend she abruptly abandoned her task and hastened
to the rendezvous.
“Are you goin’ t’-”
Mrs. Lathrop called eagerly.
“No, I ain’t,” was the incisive
reply.
Then they both adjusted their elbows
comfortably on the top rail of the fence, and Miss
Clegg began, her voice a trifle higher pitched than
usual.
“Mrs. Lathrop, it’s a
awful thing for a Christian woman to feel forced to
say, ‘n’ Lord knows I would n’t say
it to no one but you, but it’s true ‘n’
beyond a question so, ‘n’ therefore I may
’s well be frank ‘n’ open ‘n’
remark ‘t our minister ain’t no good a
tall.-’N I d’n’
know but I’ll tell any one ’s asks me the
same thing, f’r it certainly ain’t nothin’
f’r me to weep over, ‘n’ the blood
be on his head from now on.”
Miss Clegg paused briefly, and her
eyes became particularly wide open. Mrs. Lathrop
was all attention.
“Mrs. Lathrop, you ain’t
lived next to me ‘n’ known me in ‘n’
out ‘n’ hind ‘n’ front all
these years not to know ’t I ’m pretty
sharp. I ain’t been cheated mor’
’n twice ’n my life, ‘n’ one
o’ them times was n’t my fault, for it
was printed on the band ’t it would wash.
Such bein’ the case, ‘n’ takin’
the minister into consideration, I do consider ’t
no man would ‘a’ supposed ‘t
he could get the better o’ me. It’s
a sad thing to have to own to, ‘n’ if I
was anybody else in kingdom come I ’d never
own to it till I got there; but my way is to live
open ‘n’ aboveboard, ‘n’ so
to my shame be ’t told ’t the minister-with
all ’t he’s got eight children ‘n’
I ain’t even married-is certainly
as sharp as me. Last night when I see him comin’
up the walk I never ’d ‘a’ believed
’s he c’d get away again so easy, but
it just goes to show what a world o’ deceit this
is, ‘n’ seein’ ’s I have father
to clean from his windows aroun’ to-day, I ’ll
ask you to excuse me ‘f I don’t draw the
subjeck out none, but jus’ remark flat ‘n’
plain ‘t there ain’t no chance o’
my ever marryin’ the minister. You
may consider that a pretty strong statement, Mrs.
Lathrop, ‘n’ I don’t say myself but
’t with any other man there might be a hereafter,
but it was me ‘n’ not anybody else as see
his face last night, ‘n’ seein’
his face ‘n’ bein’ a woman o’
more brains ’n falls to the lot of yourself
‘n’ the majority, I may just as well say
once for all that, ’s far ’s the minister’s
concerned, I sh’ll never be married to him.”
“What did he-” began Mrs. Lathrop.
“All ’t was necessary
‘n’ more too. He did n’t give
me hardly time to state ’t I was single afore
he come out strong ’t we ’d both better
stay so. I spoke right out to his face then, ‘n’
told him ’t my shingles was new last year ‘n’
it was a open question whether his ’d ever be,
but he piped up f’r all the world like some o’
the talkin’ was his to do, ‘n’ said
’t he had a cistern ‘n’ I ’d
only got a sunk hogshead under the spout. I did
n’t see no way to denyin’ that,
but I went right on ‘n’ asked him ’f
he could in his conscience deny ’t them eight
children stood in vital need of a good mother, ‘n’
he spoke up ’s quick ’s scat ‘n’
said ’t no child stood in absolute vital need
of a mother after it was born. ‘N’
then he branched out ‘n’ give me to understand
’t he had a wife till them eight children all
got themselves launched ‘n’ ‘t it
was n’t his fault her dyin’ o’ Rachel
Rebecca. When he said ‘dyin’,’
I broke in ‘n’ said ’t it was Bible-true
’s there was ’s good fish in the sea ’s
ever was caught out of it, ‘n’ he was
impolite enough to interrupt ‘n’ tell me
to my face ’Yes, but when a man had been caught
once he was n’t easy caught again.’
I will own ’t I was more ’n put out ‘t
that, for o’ course when I said fish
I meant his wife ‘n’ me, but when he pretended
to think ’t I meant him I begin to doubt ’s
it was worth while to tackle him further. One
man can lead a horse to water, but a thousand can’t
get him to stick his nose in ’f he don’t
want to, ‘n’ I thank my stars ‘t
I ain’t got nothin’ ’n me as craves
to marry a man ’s appears dead-set ag’in’
the idea. I asked him ’f he did n’t
think ‘s comin’ into property was always
a agreeable feelin’, ‘n’ he said,
’Yes, but not when with riches come a secret
thorn in the flesh,’ ‘n’ at that
I clean give up, ‘n’ I hope it was n’t
to my discredit, for no one on the face of the earth
could ‘a’ felt ’t there ’d
be any good in keepin’ on. But it was no
use, ‘n’ you know ’s well as I do
’t I never was give to wastin’ my breath,
so I out ‘n’ told him ‘t I was n’t
giv’ to wastin’ my time either, ‘n’
then I stood up ‘n’ he did too. ‘N’
then I got even with him, ‘n’ I
c’n assure you ’t I enjoyed it, f’r
I out ‘n’ told him ’t I ’d
changed my mind about the quarter. So he had
all that long walk for nothin’, ‘n’
I can’t in conscience deny ’t I was more
’n rejoiced, for Lord knows I did n’t consider
’t he’d acted very obligin’.”
Mrs. Lathrop ceased to chew and looked
deeply sympathetic.
There was a brief silence, and then
she asked, “Was you thinkin’ o’
tryin’ any-”
Miss Clegg stared at her in amazement.
“Mrs. Lathrop! Do you think
I’d give up now, ‘n’ let the minister
see ‘t my marryin’ depended on his
say-so? Well, I guess not! I’m more
dead-set ‘n’ ever, ‘n’ I vow
‘n’ declare ’t I’ll never draw
breath till after I’ve stood up right in the
face o’ the minister ‘n’ the whole
congregation ‘n’ had ‘n’ held
some man, no matter who nor when nor where. Marryin’
was goin’ to have been a pleasure, now it’s
a business. I’m goin’ to get a horse
‘n’ buggy this afternoon ‘n’
drive out to Farmer Sperrit’s. I’ve
thought it all over, ‘n’ I c’n tell
father ‘t I’ll be choppin’ wood;
then ’f he says afterwards ’t he called
‘n’ called, I c’n say ‘t I
was makin’ so much noise ’t I did n’t
hear him.”
“You’ll have to hire-”
suggested Mrs. Lathrop.
“I know, but it won’t
cost but fifty cents, ‘n’ I saved a quarter
on the minister, you know. I’d like to
ask you to drive out with me, Mrs. Lathrop, but if
Mr. Sperrit’s got it in him to talk like the
minister did, I’m free to confess ’t,
I’d rather be alone to listen. ‘N’
really, Mrs. Lathrop, I must go in now. I’ve
got bread a-risin’ ‘n’ dishes to
do, ‘n’, as I told you before, this is
father’s day to be all but scraped ‘n’
varnished.”
Mrs. Lathrop withdrew her support
from the fence, and Miss Clegg did likewise.
Each returned up her own path to her own domicile,
and it was long after that day’s tea-time before
the cord of friendship got knotted up again.
“Did you go to the farm?”
Mrs. Lathrop asked. “I was to the Sewin’
So-”
“Yes, I went,” said Miss
Clegg, her air decidedly weary; “oh, yes, I
went. I had a nice ride too, ‘n’ I
do believe I saw the whole farm, from the pigs to
the punkins.”
There was a pause, and Mrs. Lathrop
filled it to the brim with expectancy until she could
wait no longer.
“Are you-” she finally asked.
“No,” said her friend,
sharply, “I ain’t. He wasn’t
a bit spry to hop at the chance, ‘n’ Lord
knows there wa’n’t no great urgin’
on my part. I asked him why he ain’t never
married, ‘n’ he laughed like it was a
funny subjeck, ‘n’ said ’s long ’s
he never did it ’t that was the least o’
his troubles. I didn’t call that
a very encouragin’ beginnin’, but my mind
was made up not to let it be my fault ’f
the horse was a dead waste o’ fifty cents, ‘n’
so I said to him ’t if he’d marry any
woman with a little money he could easy buy the little
Jones farm right next him, ‘n’ then ’t
’d be ’s clear ’s day that it ’d
be his own fault if he didn’t soon stretch right
from the brook to the road. He laughed some more
’t that, ‘n’ said ’t I didn’t
seem to be aware ’t he owned a mortgage on the
Jones farm ‘n’ got all ’t it raised
now ‘n’ would get the whole thing in less
’n two years.”
Mrs. Lathrop stopped chewing.
“They was sayin’ in the
Sewin’ Society ‘s he’s goin’
to marry Eliza Gr-” she said
mildly.
Miss Clegg almost screamed.
“Eliza Gringer, as keeps house for him?”
Her friend nodded.
Miss Clegg drew in a sudden breath.
“Well! ’f I’d knowed
that, I’d never ‘a’ paid fifty
cents for that horse ‘n’ buggy! Eliza
Gringer! why, she’s older ‘n’ I am,-she
was to ‘Cat’ when I was only to ‘M.’
‘N’ he’s goin’ to marry her!
Oh, well, I d’n’ know ’s it makes
any difference to me. In my opinion a man as ’d
be fool enough to be willin’ to marry a woman
‘s ain’t got nothin’ but herself
to give him, ‘s likelier to be happier bein’
her fool ’n he ever would be bein’ mine.”
There was a pause.
“Your father’s just the-”
Mrs. Lathrop said at last.
“Same? Oh yes, he’s
just the same. Seems ’t I can’t remember
when he wasn’t just the same.”
Then there was another pause.
“I ain’t discouraged,”
Susan announced suddenly, almost aggressively,-“I
ain’t discouraged ‘n’ I won’t
give up. I’m goin’ to see Mr. Weskin,
the lawyer, to-morrow. They say-’n’
I never see nothin’ to lead me to doubt ’em-’t
he’s stingy ‘n’ mean for all he’s
forever makin’ so merry at other folks’
expense; but I believe ’t there’s good
in everythin’ ‘f you’re willin’
to hunt for it ‘n’ Lord knows ’t
if this game keeps up much longer I ’ll get so
used to huntin’ ‘t huntin’ the good
in Lawyer Weskin ‘ll jus’ be child’s
play to me.”
“I was thinkin’-” began
Mrs. Lathrop.
“It ain’t no use if you
are,” said her neighbor; “the mosquitoes
is gettin’ too thick. We ’d better
in.”
And so they parted for the night.
The following evening was hot and
breathless, the approach of Fourth of July appearing
to hang heavily over all. Susan brought a palm-leaf
fan with her to the fence and fanned vigorously.
“It ain’t goin’
to be the lawyer, either,” she informed the expectant
Mrs. Lathrop, “‘n’ I hav’ n’t
no tears to shed over that. I went there
the first thing after dinner, ‘n’ he give
me a solid chair ‘n’ whirled aroun’
in one ’t twisted, ‘n’ I did n’t
fancy such manners under such circumstances a tall.
I’d say suthin’ real serious ‘n’
he’d brace himself ag’in his desk ‘n’
take a spin ’s if I did n’t count for
sixpence. I could n’t seem to bring him
around to the seriousness of the thing nohow.
‘N’ I come right out square ‘n’
open in the very beginnin’ too, for Lord knows
I ‘m dead sick o’ beatin’ around
the bush o’ men’s natural shyness.
He whirled himself clean around two times ‘n’
then said ’s long ’s I was so frank with
him ’t it ‘d be nothin’ but a joy
for him to be equally frank with me ‘n’
jus’ say ’s he’d rather not.
I told him he ’d ought to remember ’s he
‘d have a lot o’ business when father died
’f he kept my good will, but he was lookin’
over ‘n’ under himself to see how near
to unscrewed he was ‘n’ if it was safe
to keep on turnin’ the same way any longer,
‘n’ upon my honor, Mrs. Lathrop, I was
nigh to mad afore he got ready to remark ’s
father ’d left him a legacy on condition ’t
he did n’t charge nothin’ for probatin’.”
Mrs. Lathrop chewed her clover.
“So I come away, ‘n’
I declare my patience is nigh to gin out. This
gettin’ married is harder ‘n’ house-paintin’
in fly-time. I d’n’ know when I ’ve
felt so tired. Here’s three nights ’t
I ’ve had to make my ideas all over new
to suit a different husband each night. It made
my very bones ache to think o’ pilin’
them eight children ‘n’ the minister on
top o’ father, ‘n’ then the next
night it was a good jump out to that farm, f’r
I never was one to know any species o’ fellow-feelin’
with pigs ‘n’ milkin’. ‘N’
last night!-well, you know I never liked
Mr. Weskin anyhow. But I d’n’ know
who I can get now. There’s Mrs.
Healy’s husband, o’ course; but when a
woman looks happier in her coffin ’n she ever
looked out of it it’s more’n a hint to
them’s stays behind to fight shy o’ her
husband. They say he used to throw dishes at
her, ‘n’ I never could stand that-I’m
too careful o’ my china to risk any such goin’s
on.”
Mrs. Lathrop started to speak, but got no further.
“There’s a new clerk in
the drug-store,-I see him through the window
when I was comin’ home to-day. He looked
to be a nice kind o’ man, but I can’t
help feelin’ ’t it ‘d be kind o’
awkward to go up to him ‘n’ have to begin
by askin’ him what my name ’d be ’f
I married him. Maybe there’s them ’s
could do such a thing, but I ‘ve never had
nothin’ about me ’s ‘d lead me to
throw myself at the head o’ any man, ‘n’
it’s too late in the day f’r me to start
in now.”
Mrs. Lathrop again attempted to get
in a word and was again unsuccessful.
“I don’t believe ’t
there’s another free man in the town. I’ve
thought ‘n’ thought ‘n’ I
can’t think o’ one.” She stopped
and sighed.
“There’s Jathrop!”
said Mrs. Lathrop, with sudden and complete success.
Jathrop was her son, so baptized through a fearful
slip of the tongue at a critical moment. He was
meant to have been John.
Miss Clegg gave such a start that
she dropped her fan over the fence.
“Well, Heaven forgive me!”
she cried,-“‘n’ me ’t
never thought of him once, ‘n’ him so
handy right on the other side of the fence! Did
I ever!”
“He ain’t thir-” said
Mrs. Lathrop, picking up the fan.
“I don’t care. What’s
twelve years or so when it’s the woman ’s
’as got the property? Well, Mrs. Lathrop,
I certainly am obliged to you for mentionin’
him, for I don’t believe he ever would ‘a’
occurred to me in kingdom come. ‘N’
here I’ve been worryin’ my head off ever
since supper-time ‘n’ all for suthin’
’s close ’s Jathrop Lathrop. But I
had good cause to worry, ‘n’ now ‘t
it’s over I don’t mind mentionin’
the reason ‘n’ tellin’ you frank
‘n’ plain ’t I’d begun on my
things. I cut out a pink nightgown last night,
a real fussy one, ‘n’ I felt sick all
over ’t the thought ’t perhaps I’d
wasted all that cloth. There wasn’t nothin’
foolish about cuttin’ out the nightgown, for
I’d made up my mind ’t if it looked too
awful fancy on ’t I’d just put it away
for the oldest girl when she gets married, but o’
course ’f I can’t get a husband stands
to reason there’ll be no oldest girl, ‘n’
all that ten cent gingham ‘t Shores is sellin’
off’t five ’d be a dead waste o’
good stuff.”
Mrs. Lathrop chewed her clover.
“Do you suppose there’ll
be any trouble with Jathrop? Do you suppose it’ll
matter any to him which side o’ the fence he
lives on?”
Mrs. Lathrop shook her head slowly.
“I sh’d think he ought
to be only too pleased to marry me ’f I want
him to, all the days ’t I tended him when he
was a baby! My, but he was a cute little
fellow! Everybody was lookin’ for him to
grow up a real credit to you then. Well,
’s far ’s that goes, it’s a ill wind
’t blows no good, ‘n’ no one c’n
deny ’t he’s been easy for you to manage,
‘n’ what’s sauce f’r the goose
is sauce f’r the gander, so I sh’ll look
to be equally lucky.”
Mrs. Lathrop looked proud and pleased.
“Why can’t you ask him
to-night ‘n’ let me know the first thing
in the mornin’? That’ll save me havin’
to come ‘way aroun’ by the gate, you know.”
Mrs. Lathrop assented to the obvious
good sense of this proposition with one emphatic nod
of her head.
“‘N’ I’ll
come out jus’ ’s quick ‘s I can in
the mornin’ ‘n’ hear what he said;
I’ll come ’s soon ’s ever I can get
father ‘n’ the dishes washed up.
I hope to Heaven father’ll sleep more this night
’n he did last. He was awful restless last
night. He kept callin’ f’r things
till finally I had to take a pillow and go down on
the dinin’-room lounge to keep from bein’
woke up any more.”
“Do you think he’s-”
“No, I don’t think he’s
worse; not ‘nless wakin’ up ‘n’
askin’ f’r things jus’ to be aggravatin’
is worse. If it is, then he is too. But,
lor, there ain’t no manner o’ use in talkin’
o’ father! A watched pot never boils!
Jathrop’s more to the point right now.”
Upon this hint Mrs. Lathrop de-fenced
herself, so to speak, and the friendly chat ended
for that time.
The morning after, Miss Clegg was
slow to appear at the summons of her neighbor.
When she did approach the spot where the other stood
waiting, her whole face and figure bore a weary and
fretful air.
“Father jus’ about kept
me up this whole blessed night,” she began as
soon as she was within easy hearing. “I
d’n’ know what I want to get married f’r,
when I’m bound to be man-free in twenty-five
years ’f I c’n jus’ make out to
live that long.”
Mrs. Lathrop chewed and listened.
“If there was anythin’
in the house ’t father didn’t ask f’r
‘n’ ’t I didn’t get him last
night, it must ‘a’ been the cook-stove
in the kitchen. I come nigh to losin’ a
toe in the rat-trap the third time I was down cellar,
‘n’ I clum that ladder to the garret so
many times ’t I do believe I dusted all overhead
with my hair afore mornin’. My ears is
full o’ cobwebs too, ‘n’ you know
’s well ’s I do ’t I never was one
to fancy cobwebs about me. They say ’t every
cloud has a silver linin’, but I can’t
see no silver linin’ to a night like last night.
When the rooster crowed f’r the first time this
mornin’, I had it in my heart to march right
out there ‘n’ hack off his head. If
it ’d ‘a’ been Saturday, I’d
‘a’ done ’t too, ‘n’
relished him good at Sunday dinner!”
Miss Clegg paused and compressed her
lips firmly for a few seconds; then she gave herself
a little shake and descended to the main question
of the day.
“Well, what did Jathrop say?”
Mrs. Lathrop looked very uncomfortable
indeed, and in lieu of an answer swallowed her clover.
“You asked him, didn’t you?”
“Yes, I-”
“Well, what ’d he say?”
“He ain’t very-”
“My soul ‘n’ body! What reason
did he give?”
“He’s afraid your father’s livin’
on a annu-”
“Well, he ain’t.”
Susan’s tone was more than a little displeased.
“Whatever else father may ‘a’ done,
he never played no annuity tricks. He ‘s
livin’ on his own property, ‘n’ I’ll
take it very kindly o’ you, Mrs. Lathrop, to
make that piece o’ news clear to your son.
My father’s got bank-stock, ‘n’
he owns them two cottages across the bridge, ‘n’
the blacksmith-shop belongs to him too. There!
I declare I never thought o’ the blacksmith,-his
wife died last winter.”
“Jathrop asked me what I th-”
“Well, what ’d you tell him?”
“I said ’t if your father was some older-”
Miss Clegg’s eyebrows moved understandingly.
“How long is it since you’ve
seen father?” she asked without waiting for
the other to end her sentence.
“Not since your mother died, I guess; I was-”
“I wish you c’d come over
‘n’ take a look at him now ‘n’
tell me your opinion. Why can’t you?”
Mrs. Lathrop reflected.
“I don’t see why I can’t. I’ll
go in ‘n’ take off-”
“All right, ‘n’
when you’ve got it off, come right over ‘n’
you’ll find me in the kitchen waitin’
for you.”
Mrs. Lathrop returned to her own house
to shed her apron and wash her hands, and then sallied
over to view Mr. Clegg. The two friends mounted
the stair together, and entered the old man’s
room.
It was a scrupulously clean and bright
and orderly room, and the invalid in the big white
bed bore evidence to the care and attention so dutifully
lavished on him. He was a very wizened little
old man, and his features had been crossed and recrossed
by the finger of Time until their original characteristics
were nearly obliterated. The expression upon
his face resembled nothing so much as a sketch which
has been done over so many times that its first design
is altogether lost, and if there was any answer to
the riddle, it was not the mental perception of Mrs.
Lathrop that was about to seize upon it.
Instead, that kindly visitor stood
lost in a species of helpless contemplation, until
at last a motion of Susan’s, directed towards
the ordering of an unsightly fold in the wide smoothness
of the counterpane, led to her bending herself to
do a similar kindness upon her side of the bed.
The action resulted in a slight change in her expression
which Susan’s watchfulness at once perceived.
“Was it a needle?” she
asked quickly. “Sometimes I stick ’em
in while I’m sewin’. You see, his
havin’ been paralyzed so many years has got
me where I’m awful careless about leavin’
needles in his bed.”
“No,” said Mrs. Lathrop; “it wasn’t
a-”
“Come on downstairs again,” said the hostess;
“we c’n talk there.”
They went down into the kitchen, and
there Mrs. Lathrop seated herself and coughed solemnly.
“What is it, anyhow?” the younger woman
demanded.
Mrs. Lathrop coughed again.
“Susan, did I feel a feather-”
“Yes,” said Susan, in great surprise;
“he likes one.”
“I sh’d think it was too hot this-”
“He don’t never complain
o’ the heat, ‘n’ he hates the chill
o’ rainy days.”
Mrs. Lathrop coughed again.
Miss Clegg’s interest bordered on impatience.
“Now, Susan, I ain’t sayin’
as it’s noways true, but I have heard
as there’s them ’s can’t die on-”
“On feathers?” cried the daughter.
“Yes; they say they hold the life right in ’n’-”
Miss Clegg’s eyes opened widely.
“But I couldn’t take it
away from him, anyhow,” she said, with a species
of determined resignation in her voice. “I’d
have to wait ’till he wanted it took.”
Mrs. Lathrop was silent. Then
she rose to go. Susan rose too. They went
out the kitchen door together, and down the steps.
There they paused to part.
“Do you believe ’t it
‘d be any use me thinkin’ o’ Jathrop
any more?” the maiden asked the matron.
“I believe I’d try the
blacksmith if I was you; he looks mighty nice Sundays.”
Miss Clegg sighed heavily and turned
to re-enter the house.
Mrs. Lathrop went “round by
the gate” and became again an inmate of her
own kitchen. There the thought occurred to her
that it was an excellent morning to clean the high-shelf
over the sink. For years past whenever she had
had occasion to put anything up there, showers of
dust and rolls of lint had come tumbling down upon
her head. Under such circumstances it was but
natural that a determination to some day clean the
shelf should have slowly but surely been developed.
Accordingly she climbed up on the edge of the sink
and undertook the initiatory proceedings. The
lowest stratum of dirt was found to rest upon a newspaper
containing an account of one day of Guiteau’s
trial. Upon the discovery of the paper Mrs. Lathrop
suddenly abandoned her original plan, got down from
the sink, ensconced herself in her kitchen rocker,
and plunged into bliss forthwith.
An hour passed pleasantly and placidly
by. Bees buzzed outside the window, the kettle
sizzled sweetly on the stove, the newspaper rustled
less and less, Mrs. Lathrop’s head sank sideways,
and the calm of perfect peace reigned in her immediate
vicinity.
This state of things endured not long.
Its gentle Paradise was suddenly broken
in upon and rent apart by a succession of the most
piercing shrieks that ever originated in the throat
of a human being. Mrs. Lathrop came to herself
with a violent start, sprang to her feet, ran to the
door, and then stood still, completely dazed and at
first unable to discern from which direction the ear-splitting
screams proceeded. Then, in a second, her senses
returned to her, and she ran as fast as she could to
the fence. As she approached the boundary, she
saw Susan standing in one of her upstairs windows
and yelling at the top of her voice. Mrs. Lathrop
paused for no conventionalities of civilization.
She hoisted herself over the fence in a fashion worthy
a man or a monkey, ran across the Clegg yard, entered
the kitchen door, stumbled breathlessly up the dark
back stairs, and gasped, grabbing Susan hard by the
elbow,-
“What is it, for pity’s-”
Susan was all colors and shaking as if with the ague.
“You never told me ’s it ’d work
so quick,” she cried out.
“What would-”
“The feathers!”
“Whose feathers?”
“Father’s feathers.”
“Lord have mercy, Susan, you don’t mean-”
“Yes, I do.”
“He ain’t never-”
“Yes, he is.”
Mrs. Lathrop stood stricken.
Susan wiped her eyes with her apron and choked.
After a while the older woman spoke feebly.
“What did hap-”
Miss Clegg cut the question off in its prime.
“I don’t know as I c’n
ever tell you; it’s too awful even to think
of.”
“But you-”
“I know, ‘n’ I’m
goin’ to. But I tell you once for all, Mrs.
Lathrop, ’t this’ll be a lesson to me
forever after ‘s to takin’ the say-so o’
other folks unto myself. ‘N’ I didn’t
really consider ‘t I was doin’ so this
time, f’r if I had, Lord knows I’d ‘a’
landed three beds atop o’ him afore I’d
‘a’ ever-” She stopped
and shook convulsively.
“Go on,” said Mrs. Lathrop,
her curiosity getting the better of her sympathy,
and her impatience ranking both.
Susan ceased sobbing, and essayed explanation.
“You see, after you was gone,
he said ’t he was pretty hot these last
nights, ‘n’ ’t that was maybe what
kept him so awfully awake. I asked him if-if-maybe
the feather-bed ’n’-well, Mrs.
Lathrop, to put the whole in a nut-shell, we settled
to move him, ‘n’ I moved him. I know
I didn’t hurt him one bit, for I’m ’s
handy with-at least, I was’s
handy with him ’s I am with a broom. ‘N’
I laid him on the lounge, ‘n’ dumped that
bed out into the back hall. I thought I ’d
sun it ‘n’ put it away this afternoon,
f’r you know ’s I’m never
no hand to leave nothin’ lyin’ aroun’.
Well, I come back ‘n’ got out some fresh
sheets, ‘n’ jus’ ’s I was-”
The speaker halted, and there was a dramatic pause.
“Where is-” Mrs. Lathrop asked
at last.
“Back in the feathers.
My heaven alive! When I see what I’d done,
I was that upset ’t I just run ’s quick
’s ever I could, ‘n’ got the bed,
‘n’ dumped it right atop of him!”
There was another dramatic silence,
finally broken by Mrs. Lathrop’s saying slowly
and gravely,-
“Susan, ’f I was you I wouldn’t
never say-”
“I ain’t goin’ to.
I made up my mind to never tell a livin’ soul
the very first thing. To think o’ me doin’
it! To think o’ all these years ’t
I’ve tended father night ‘n’ day,
‘n’ then to accidentally go ‘n’
do a thing like that! I declare, it fairly makes
me sick all over!”
“Well, Susan, you know what a good daughter
you’ve-”
“I know, ‘n’ I ‘ve
been thinkin’ of it. But somehow nothin’
don’t seem to comfort me none. Perhaps
you’d better make me some tea, ‘n’
while I’m drinkin’ it, Jathrop c’n
go down town ’n’-”
“Yes,” said Mrs. Lathrop, “‘n’
I’ll go right ’n’-”
“That’s right,” said the bereaved,
“‘n’ hurry.”
It was a week later-a calm
and lovely evening-and the two friends
stood by the fence. The orphan girl was talking,
while Mrs. Lathrop chewed her clover.
“It don’t seem like only
a week!-seems more like a month or even
a year. Well, they say sometimes, folks live
a long ways ahead in a very short time, ‘n’
I must say ’t, as far ’s my observation
’s extended, comin’ into property always
leads to experience, so I couldn’t in reason
complain ‘t not bein’ no exception.
This ’s been the liveliest week o’ my
life, ‘n’ I’m free to confess ’t
I haven’t cried anywhere near ’s much
’s I looked to. My feelin’s have been
pretty agreeable, take it all in all, ‘n’
I’d be a born fool ’f I didn’t take
solid comfort sleepin’ nights, ‘n’
I never was a fool-never was ‘n’
never will be. The havin’ somebody to sleep
in the house ’s been hard, ‘n’ Mrs.
Macy’s fallin’ through the cellar-flap
giv’ me a bad turn, but she’s doin’
nicely, ‘n’ the minister makes up f’r
anythin’. I do wish ’t you’d
seen him that afternoon, Mrs. Lathrop; he did look
so most awful sheepish, ‘n’ his
clean collar give him dead away afore he ever opened
his mouth. He set out by sayin’ ’t
the consolations of religion was mine f’r the
askin’, but I didn’t take the hint, ‘n’
so he had to jus’ come out flat ‘n’
say ‘t he’d been thinkin’ it over
‘n’ he’d changed his mind.
I held my head good ‘n’ high ’t that,
I c’n assure you, ‘n’ it was a pretty
sorry look he give me when I said ’t I’d
been thinkin’ it over too, ‘n’ I’d
changed my mind too. He could ‘a’
talked to me till doomsday about his bein’ a
consolation, I’d know it was nothin’ ‘t
changed him but me comin’ into them government
bonds. No man alive could help wantin’
me after them bonds was found, ‘n’ I had
the great pleasure o’ learnin’ that fact
out o’ Lawyer Weskin himself. All his species
o’ fun-makin’ ’t nobody but hisself
ever sees any fun in, jus’ died right out when
we unlocked father’s old desk ‘n’
come on that bundle o’ papers. He give
one look ‘n’ then all his gay spinniness
oozed right out o’ him, ‘n’ he told
me ’s serious ’s a judge ’t a woman
’s rich ’s I be needed a good lawyer to
look out f’r her ‘n’ her property
right straight along. Well, I was ’s quick
to reply ’s he was to speak. ‘N’
I was to the point too. I jus’ up ‘n’
said, Yes, I thought so myself, ‘n’ jus’
’s soon ’s I got things to rights I was
goin’ to the city ‘n’ get me one.”
Miss Clegg paused to frown reminiscently;
Mrs. Lathrop’s eyes never quitted the other’s
face.
“There was Mr. Sperrit too.
Come with a big basket o’ fresh vegetables ’t
he said he thought ‘d maybe tempt my appetite.
I d’n’ know ’s I ever enjoyed rappin’
no one over the knuckles more ’n I did him.
I jus’ stopped to take in plenty o’ breath
‘n’ then I let myself out, ‘n’
I says to him flat ‘n’ plain, I says, ’Thank
you kindly, but I guess no woman in these parts ’s
better able to tempt her own appetite ‘n’
I be now, ‘n’ you’ll be doin’
me the only kindness ’t it’s in you to
do me now if you’ll jus’ take your garden
stuff ‘n’ give it to some one ’s
is poor ‘n’ needin’.’
He looked so crestfallen ’t I made up my mind
’t it was then or never to settle my whole score
with him, so I up ‘n’ looked him right
in the eye ‘n’ I says to him, I says, ’Mr.
Sperrit, you didn’t seem to jus’ realize
what it meant to me that day ’t I took that
horse ‘n’ buggy ‘n’ drove ’way
out to your farm to see you; you didn’t seem
to think what it meant to me to take that trip:
but I c’n tell you ‘t it costs suthin’
for a woman to do a thing like that; it cost me a
good deal-it cost me fifty cents.’
He went away then, ‘n’ he can marry Eliza
Gringer if he likes, ‘n’ I’ll wish
’em both joy ‘n’ consider myself
the luckiest o’ the three.”
Mrs. Lathrop chewed her clover.
“‘N’ then there’s
Jathrop!” continued the speaker, suddenly transfixing
her friend with a piercing glance,-“there’s
even Jathrop! under my feet night ‘n’
day. I declare to you ’t upon my honor I
ain’t turned around four times out o’
five this week without almost fallin’ over Jathrop
wantin’ me to give him a chance to explain his
feelin’s, I don’t wish to hurt your feelin’s,
Mrs. Lathrop, ‘n’ it’s natural ’t,
seein’ you can’t help yourself, you look
upon him ’s better ‘n’ nothin’,
but still I will remark ‘t Jathrop’s the
last straw on top o’ my hump, ‘n’
this mornin’ when I throwed out the dish-water
‘n’ hit him by accident jus’ comin’
in, my patience clean gin out. I didn’t
feel no manner o’ sympathy over his soapy wetness,
‘n’ I spoke my mind right then ‘n’
there. ‘Jathrop Lathrop,’ I says to
him, all forgettin’ how big he’d got ‘n’
only rememberin’ what a bother he’s always
been, ‘Jathrop Lathrop, you let that soakin’
be a lesson to you ‘n’ march right straight
home this instant, ‘n’ ’f you want
to think of me, think ‘t if I hear any more
about your feelin’s the feelin’ you’ll
have best cause to talk about ‘ll be the feelin’
o’ gettin’ spanked.’”
Mrs. Lathrop sighed slightly.
Miss Clegg echoed the sigh.
“There never was a truer sayin’
‘n’ the one ’t things goes by contraries,”
she continued presently. “Here I’ve
been figgerin’ on bein’ so happy married,
‘n’ instid o’ that I find myself
missin’ father every few minutes. There
was lots o’ good about father, particular when
he was asleep. I’d got so used to his stayin’
where I put him ’t I don’t know ’s
I c’d ever get used to a man ’s could get
about. ’F I wanted to talk, father was always
there to listen, ‘n’ ’f he wanted
to talk I c’d always go downstairs. He didn’t
never have but one button to keep sewed on ‘n’
no stockings to darn a tall. ‘N’
all the time there was all them nice gover’ment
bonds savin’ up for me in his desk! No,
I sha’n’t consider no more as to gettin’
married. While it looked discouragin’ I
hung on ‘n’ never give up hope, but I sh’d
be showin’ very little o’ my natural share
o’ brains ’f I didn’t know ’s
plain ’s the moon above ’t ’f I get
to be eighty ‘n’ the fancy takes me I
c’n easy get a husband any day with those bonds.
While I couldn’t seem to lay hands on no man
I was wild to have one-now ’t I know
I c’n have any man ’t I fancy, I don’t
want no man a tall. It’ll always
be a pleasure to look back on my love-makin’,
‘n’ I wouldn’t be no woman ’f
down in the bottom of my heart I wasn’t some
pleased over havin’ ’s good ‘s had
four offers inside o’ the same week. But
I might o’ married, Mrs. Lathrop, ‘n’
Heaven might o’ seen fit to give me such a son
’s he give you, ‘n’ ‘f I hadn’t
no other reason for remainin’ single that alone
’d be s’fficient. After all, the Lord
said ’It is not good for man to be alone,’
but He left a woman free to use her common sense ‘n’
I sh’ll use mine right now. I’ve folded
up the pink nightgown, ‘n’ I’m thinkin’
very seriously o’ givin’ it to Amelia
Fitch, ‘n’ I’ll speak out frank ‘n’
open ‘n’ tell her ‘n’ everybody
else ’t I don’t envy no woman-not
now ‘n’ not never.”
Mrs. Lathrop chewed her clover.