It was a charmingly mild and balmy
day. The sun shone beyond the orchard, and the
shade was cool inside. A light breeze stirred
the boughs of the old apple tree under which the philosopher
sat.
None of these things did the philosopher
notice, unless it might be when the wind blew about
the leaves of the large volume on his knees, and he
had to find his place again. Then he would exclaim
against the wind, shuffle the leaves till he got the
right page, and settle to his reading. The book
was a treatise on ontology; it was written by another
philosopher, a friend of this philosopher’s;
it bristled with fallacies, and this philosopher was
discovering them all, and noting them on the fly leaf
at the end. He was not going to review the book
(as some might have thought from his behavior), or
even to answer it in a work of his own. It was
just that he found a pleasure in stripping any poor
fallacy naked and crucifying it.
Presently a girl in a white frock
came into the orchard. She picked up an apple,
bit it, and found it ripe. Holding it in her
hand she walked up to where the philosopher sat, and
looked at him. He did not stir. She took
a bite out of the apple, munched it, and swallowed
it. The philosopher crucified a fallacy on the
fly leaf. The girl flung the apple away.
“Mr. Jerningham,” said she, “are
you very busy?”
The philosopher, pencil in hand, looked up.
“No, Miss May,” said he, “not very.”
“Because I want your opinion.”
“In one moment,” said the philosopher
apologetically.
He turned back to the fly leaf and
began to nail the last fallacy a little tighter to
the cross. The girl regarded him, first with
amused impatience, then with a vexed frown, finally
with a wistful regret. He was so very old for
his age, she thought; he could not be much beyond
thirty; his hair was thick and full of waves, his eyes
bright and clear, his complexion not yet divested
of all youth’s relics.
“Now, Miss May, I am at your
service,” said the philosopher, with a lingering
look at his impaled fallacy. And he closed the
book, keeping it, however, on his knee.
The girl sat down just opposite to him.
“It’s a very important
thing I want to ask you,” she began, tugging
at a tuft of grass, “and it’s very difficult,
and you mustn’t tell anyone I asked you; at
least, I’d rather you didn’t.”
“I shall not speak of it; indeed,
I shall probably not remember it,” said the
philosopher.
“And you mustn’t look
at me, please, while I’m asking you.”
“I don’t think I was looking
at you, but if I was I beg your pardon,” said
the philosopher apologetically.
She pulled the tuft of grass right
out of the ground and flung it from her with all her
force.
“Suppose a man ” she
began. “No, that’s not right.”
“You can take any hypothesis
you please,” observed the philosopher, “but
you must verify it afterward, of course.”
“Oh, do let me go on.
Suppose a girl, Mr. Jerningham I wish you
wouldn’t nod.”
“It was only to show that I followed you.”
“Oh, of course you ‘follow
me,’ as you call it. Suppose a girl had
two lovers you’re nodding again or,
I ought to say, suppose there were two men who might
be in love with a girl.”
“Only two?” asked the
philosopher. “You see, any number of men
might be in love with ”
“Oh, we can leave the rest out,”
said Miss May, with a sudden dimple; “they don’t
matter.”
“Very well,” said the
philosopher. “If they are irrelevant, we
will put them aside.”
“Suppose, then, that one of
these men was oh, awfully in love with
the girl and and proposed, you
know ”
“A moment!” said the philosopher,
opening a notebook. “Let me take down
his proposition. What was it?”
“Why, proposed to her asked
her to marry him,” said the girl, with a stare.
“Dear me! How stupid of
me! I forgot that special use of the word.
Yes?”
“The girl likes him pretty well,
and her people approve of him and all that, you know.”
“That simplifies the problem,”
said the philosopher, nodding again.
“But she’s not in in
love with him, you know. She doesn’t really
care for him much. Do you understand?”
“Perfectly. It is a most natural state
of mind.”
“Well, then, suppose that there’s another
man what are you writing?”
“I only put down (B.) like
that,” pleaded the philosopher, meekly exhibiting
his notebook.
She looked at him in a sort of helpless
exasperation, with just a smile somewhere in the background
of it.
“Oh, you really are ”
she exclaimed. “But let me go on.
The other man is a friend of the girl’s; he’s
very clever oh, fearfully clever; and he’s
rather handsome. You needn’t put that down.”
“It is certainly not very material,”
admitted the philosopher, and he crossed out “handsome.”
“Clever” he left.
“And the girl is most awfully she
admires him tremendously; she thinks him just the
greatest man that ever lived, you know. And she she ”
The girl paused.
“I’m following,”
said the philosopher, with pencil poised.
“She’d think it better
than the whole world if if she could be
anything to him, you know.”
“You mean become his wife?”
“Well, of course I do at least suppose
I do.”
“You spoke rather vaguely, you know.”
The girl cast one glance at the philosopher as she
replied:
“Well, yes. I did mean, become his wife.”
“Yes. Well?”
“But,” continued the girl,
starting on another tuft of grass, “he doesn’t
think much about those things. He likes her.
I think he likes her ”
“Well, doesn’t dislike
her?” suggested the philosopher. “Shall
we call him indifferent?”
“I don’t know. Yes,
rather indifferent. I don’t think he thinks
about it, you know. But she she’s
pretty. You needn’t put that down.”
“I was not about to do so,” observed the
philosopher.
“She thinks life with him would
be just heaven; and and she thinks she
would make him awfully happy. She would would
be so proud of him, you see.”
“I see. Yes!”
“And I don’t
know how to put it, quite she thinks that,
if he ever thought about it all, he might care for
her; because he doesn’t care for anybody else;
and she’s pretty ”
“You said that before.”
“Oh, dear! I dare say
I did. And most men care for somebody, don’t
they? Some girl, I mean.”
“Most men, no doubt,” conceded the philosopher.
“Well, then, what ought she
to do? It’s not a real thing, you know,
Mr. Jerningham. It’s in in a
novel I was reading.” She said this hastily,
and blushed as she spoke.
“Dear me! And it’s
quite an interesting case! Yes, I see.
The question is, Will she act most wisely in accepting
the offer of the man who loves her exceedingly, but
for whom she entertains only a moderate affection ”
“Yes. Just a liking. He’s
just a friend.”
“Exactly. Or in marrying the other, whom
she loves ex ”
“That’s not it.
How can she marry him? He hasn’t he
hasn’t asked her, you see.”
“True. I forgot.
Let us assume, though, for the moment, that he has
asked her. She would then have to consider which
marriage would probably be productive of the greater
sum total of ”
“Oh, but you needn’t consider that.”
“But it seems the best logical
order. We can afterward make allowance for the
element of uncertainty caused by ”
“Oh, no! I don’t
want it like that. I know perfectly well which
she’d do if he the other man, you
know asked her.”
“You apprehend that ”
“Never mind what I ‘apprehend.’
Take it just as I told you.”
“Very good. A has asked her hand, B has
not.”
“Yes.”
“May I take it that, but for
the disturbing influence of B, A would be a satisfactory er candidate?”
“Ye es. I think so.”
“She, therefore, enjoys a certainty
of considerable happiness if she marries A?”
“Ye es. Not perfect, because
of B, you know.”
“Quite so, quite so; but still
a fair amount of happiness. Is it not so?”
“I don’t well, perhaps.”
“On the other hand, if B did
ask her, we are to postulate a higher degree of happiness
for her?”
“Yes, please, Mr. Jerningham much
higher.”
“For both of them?”
“For her. Never mind him.”
“Very well. That again
simplifies the problem. But his asking her is
a contingency only?”
“Yes, that’s all.”
The philosopher spread out his hands.
“My dear young lady,”
he said, “it becomes a question of degree.
How probable or improbable is it?”
“I don’t know. Not very probable unless unless ”
“Well?”
“Unless he did happen to notice, you know.”
“Ah, yes. We supposed
that, if he thought of it, he would probably take
the desired step at least that he might
be led to do so. Could she not er indicate
her preference?”
“She might try no,
she couldn’t do much. You see, he he
doesn’t think about such things.”
“I understand precisely.
And it seems to me, Miss May, that in that very fact
we find our solution.”
“Do we?” she asked.
“I think so. He has evidently
no natural inclination toward her perhaps
not toward marriage at all. Any feeling aroused
in him would be necessarily shallow and in a measure
artificial and in all likelihood purely
temporary. Moreover, if she took steps to arouse
his attention, one of two things would be likely to
happen. Are you following me?”
“Yes, Mr. Jerningham.”
“Either he would be repelled
by her overtures which you must admit is
not improbable and then the position would
be unpleasant, and even degrading, for her.
Or, on the other hand, he might, through a misplaced
feeling of gallantry ”
“Through what?”
“Through a mistaken idea of
politeness, or a mistaken view of what was kind, allow
himself to be drawn into a connection for which he
had no genuine liking. You agree with me that
one or other of these things would be likely?”
“Yes, I suppose they would,
unless he did come to care for her.”
“Ah, you return to that hypothesis.
I think it’s an extremely fanciful one.
No. She needn’t marry A, but she must
let B alone.”
The philosopher closed his book, took
off his glasses, wiped them, replaced them, and leaned
back against the trunk of the apple tree. The
girl picked a dandelion in pieces. After a long
pause she asked:
“You think B’s feelings
wouldn’t be at all likely to to change?”
“That depends on the sort of
man he is. But if he is an able man, with intellectual
interests which engross him a man who has
chosen his path in life a man to whom women’s
society is not a necessity ”
“He’s just like that,”
said the girl, and she bit the head off a daisy.
“Then,” said the philosopher,
“I see not the least reason for supposing that
his feelings will change.”
“And would you advise her to marry the other A?”
“Well, on the whole, I should.
A is a good fellow (I think we made A a good fellow);
he is a suitable match; his love for her is true and
genuine ”
“It’s tremendous!”
“Yes and er extreme.
She likes him. There is every reason to hope
that her liking will develop into a sufficiently deep
and stable affection. She will get rid of her
folly about B and make A a good wife. Yes, Miss
May, if I were the author of your novel, I should make
her marry A, and I should call that a happy ending.”
A silence followed. It was broken by the philosopher.
“Is that all you wanted my opinion
about, Miss May?” he asked, with his finger
between the leaves of the treatise on ontology.
“Yes, I think so. I hope I haven’t
bored you?”
“I’ve enjoyed the discussion
extremely. I had no idea that novels raised
points of such psychological interest. I must
find time to read one.”
The girl had shifted her position
till, instead of her full face, her profile was turned
toward him. Looking away toward the paddock that
lay brilliant in sunshine on the skirts of the apple
orchard, she asked, in low, slow tones, twisting her
hands in her lap:
“Don’t you think that
perhaps, if B found out afterward when she
had married A, you know that she had cared
for him so very, very much, he might be a little sorry?”
“If he were a gentleman, he would regret it
deeply.”
“I mean sorry on
his own account; that that he had thrown
away all that, you know?”
The professor looked meditative.
“I think,” he pronounced,
“that it is very possible he would. I can
well imagine it.”
“He might never find anybody
to love him like that again,” she said, gazing
on the gleaming paddock.
“He probably would not,” agreed the philosopher.
“And and most people like being loved,
don’t they?”
“To crave for love is an almost universal instinct,
Miss May.”
“Yes, almost,” she said,
with a dreary little smile. “You see, he’ll
get old and and have no one to look after
him.”
“He will.”
“And no home.”
“Well, in a sense none,”
corrected the philosopher, smiling. “But
really, you’ll frighten me. I’m a
bachelor myself, you know, Miss May.”
“Yes,” she whispered just audibly.
“And all your terrors are before me.”
“Well, unless ”
“Oh, we needn’t have that
‘unless,’” laughed the philosopher
cheerfully. “There’s no ‘unless’
about it, Miss May.”
The girl jumped to her feet; for an
instant she looked at the philosopher. She opened
her lips as if to speak, and, at the thought of what
lay at her tongue’s tip, her face grew red.
But the philosopher was gazing past her, and his
eyes rested in calm contemplation on the gleaming
paddock.
“A beautiful thing, sunshine, to be sure,”
said he.
Her blush faded away into paleness;
her lips closed. Without speaking she turned
and walked slowly away, her head drooping. The
philosopher heard the rustle of her skirt in the long
grass of the orchard; he watched her for a few moments.
“A pretty, graceful creature,”
said he, with a smile. Then he opened his book,
took his pencil in his hand, and slipped in a careful
forefinger to mark the fly leaf.
The sun had passed mid-heaven, and
began to decline westward before he finished the book.
Then he stretched himself and looked at his watch.
“Good gracious, two o’clock!
I shall be late for lunch!” and he hurried
to his feet.
He was very late for lunch.
“Everything’s cold,”
wailed his hostess. “Where have you been,
Mr. Jerningham?”
“Only in the orchard reading.”
“And you’ve missed May!”
“Missed Miss May? How
do you mean? I had a long talk with her this
morning a most interesting talk.”
“But you weren’t here
to say goodby. Now, you don’t mean to say
that you forgot that she was leaving by the two o’clock
train? What a man you are!”
“Dear me! To think of
my forgetting it!” said the philosopher shamefacedly.
“She told me to say good-by to you for her.”
“She’s very kind. I can’t
forgive myself.”
His hostess looked at him for a moment;
then she sighed, and smiled, and sighed again.
“Have you everything you want?” she asked.
“Everything, thank you,”
said he, sitting down opposite the cheese, and propping
his book (he thought he would just run through the
last chapter again) against the loaf; “everything
in the world that I want, thanks.”
His hostess did not tell him that
the girl had come in from the apple orchard, and run
hastily upstairs lest her friend should see what her
friend did see in her eyes. So that he had no
suspicion at all that he had received an offer of
marriage and refused it. And he did
not refer to anything of that sort when he paused
once in his reading and exclaimed:
“I’m really sorry I missed
Miss May. That was an interesting case of hers.
But I gave the right answer. The girl ought
to marry A.”
And so the girl did.