“What ho, there!”
At this feudal summons I turned, and
spied the Bashaw elbowing his way towards me through
the Fleet Street crowd, his hat and tie askew and
his big face a red beacon of goodwill. He fell
on my neck, and we embraced.
“Is me recreant child returned?
Is he tired at last av annihilatin’ all
that’s made to a green thought in a green shade?
An’ did he homesickun by the Cornish Coast for
the Street that Niver Sleeps, an’ the whirroo
an’ stink av her, an’ the foomum
et opase strepitumke - to drink delight
av battle with his peers, an’ see the great
Achilles whom he knew - meanin’ meself?”
The Bashaw’s style in conversation, as in print,
bristles with allusion.
I shook my head.
“I go back to-morrow, I hope.
Business brought me up, and as soon as it’s
settled I pack.”
“Too quick despairer - but
I take it ye’ll be bound just now for the Cheese.
Right y’are; and I’ll do meself the honour
to lunch wid ye, at your expense.”
Everyone knows and loves the Bashaw,
alias the O’Driscoll, that genial failure.
Generations of Fleet Street youths have taken advice
and help from him: have prospered, grown reputable,
rich, and even famous: and have left him where
he stood. Nobody can remember the time when O’Driscoll
was not; though, to judge from his appearance, he must
have stepped upon the town from between the covers
of an illustrated keepsake, such as our grandmothers
loved - so closely he resembles the Corsair
of that period, with his ripe cheeks, melting eyes,
and black curls that twist like the young tendrils
of a vine. The curls are dyed now-a-days, and
his waist is not what it used to be in the picture-books;
but time has worn nothing off his temper. He is
perennially enthusiastic, and can still beat any journalist
in London in describing a Lord Mayor’s Show.
“You behould in me,” he
went on, with a large hand on my shoulder, “the
victum av a recent eviction - a penniless
outcast. ’Tis no beggar’s petition
that I’ll be profferin’, however, but a
bargun. Give me a salad, a pint av hock,
an’ fill me pipe wid the Only Mixture, an’
I’ll repay ye across the board wid a narrative - the
sort av God-forsaken, ord’nary thrifle
that you youngsters turn into copy - may
ye find forgiveness! ’Tis no use to me whatever.
Ted O’Driscoll’s instrument was iver the
big drum, and he knows his limuts.”
“Yes, me boy,” he resumed,
five minutes later, as he sat in the Cheshire Cheese,
beneath Dr. Johnson’s portrait, balancing a
black-handled knife between his first and second fingers,
and nodding good-fellowship to every journalist in
the room, “the apartment in Bloomsbury is desolut;
the furnichur’ - what was lift
av ut - disparsed; the leopard
an’ the lizard keep the courts where O’Driscoll
gloried an’ drank deep; an’ the wild ass - meanin’
by that the midical student on the fourth floor - stamps
overhead, but cannot break his sleep. I’ve
been evicted: that’s the long and short
av ut. Lord help me! - I’d
have fared no worse in the ould country - here’s
to her! Think what immortal copy I’d have
made out av the regrettable incident over there!”
His voice broke, but not for self-pity. It always
broke when he mentioned Ireland.
“Is it comfort ye’d be
speakin’?” he began again, filling his
glass. “Me dear fellow, divvle a doubt
I’ll fetch round tight an’ safe. Ould
Mick Sullivan - he that built the Wild
Girl, the fastest vessel that iver put out av
Limerick - ould Mick Sullivan used to
swear he’d make any ship seaworthy that didn’
leak worse than a five-barred gate. An’
that’s me, more or less. I’m an ould
campaigner. But listen to this. Me feelin’s
have been wrung this day, and that sorely. I promised
ye the story, an’ I must out wid ut, whether
or no.”
It was the hour when the benches of
the Cheese begin to empty. My work was over for
the day, and I disposed myself to listen.
“The first half I spent at the
acadimy where they flagellated the rudiments
av polite learnin’ into me small carcuss,
I made a friend. He was the first I iver made,
though not the last, glory be to God! But first
friendship is like first love for the sweet taste it
puts in the mouth. Niver but once in his life
will a man’s heart dance to that chune.
’Twas a small slip of a Saxon lad that it danced
for then: a son av a cursed agint,
that I should say it. But sorra a thought
had I for the small boccawn’s nationality nor
for his own father’s trade. I only knew
the friendship in his pretty eyes an’ the sweetness
that knit our two sowls togither, like David’s
an’ Jonathan’s. Pretty it was to
walk togither, an’ discourse, an’ get the
strap togither for heaven knows what mischief, an’
consowl each other for our broken skins. He’d
a wonderful gift at his books, for which I reverenced
um, and at the single-stick, for which I loved
um. Niver to this day did I call up the
ould play-ground widout behowldin’ that one boy,
though all the rest av the faces (the master’s
included) were vague as wather - wather in
which that one pair av eyes was reflected.
“The school was a great four-square
stone buildin’ beside a windy road, and niver
a tree in sight; but pastures where the grass would
cut your boot, an’ stone walls, an’ brown
hills around, like the rim av a saucer.
All belonged to the estate that Jemmy Nichol’s
father managed - a bankrupt property, or
next door to that. It’s done better since
he gave up the place; but when I’ve taken a glance
at the landscape since (as I have, once or twice)
I see no difference. To me ’tis the naked
land I looked upon the last day av the summer
half, when I said good-bye to Jemmy; for he was lavin’
the school that same afternoon for Dublin, to cross
over to England wid his father.
“Sick at heart was I, an’
filled already wid the heavy sense of solitariness,
as we stood by the great iron gate wishin’ one
another fare-ye-well.
“‘Jemmy avick,’
says I, ’dull, dull will it be widout ye here.
And, Jemmy - send some av my heart back
to me when ye write, as ye promise to do.’
“‘Wheniver I lay me down,
Ned,’ he answered me (though by nature a close-hearted
English boy), ‘I’ll think o’ ye;
an’ wheniver I rise up I’ll think o’
ye. May the Lord do so to me, an’ more also,
if I cease from lovin’ ye till my life’s
end.’
“So we kissed like a pair av
girls, and off he was driven, leavin’ a
great hollow inside the rim av the hills.
An’ I ran up to the windy dormitory, stumblin’
at ivery third step for the blindin’ tears, and
watched um from the window there growin’
small along the road. ’Ye Mountains av
Gilboa,’ said I, shakin’ my fist at the
hills, ’let there be no dew, neither let there
be rain upon ye;’ for I hated the place now
that Jemmy was gone.
“Well, ’twas the ould
story - letters at first in plenty, then fewer,
then none at all. Long before I came over to try
my luck I’d lost all news of Jem: didn’t
know his address, even. Nor till to-day have I
set eyes on um. He’s bald-headed,
me boy, and crooked-faytured, to-day; but I knew him
for Jemmy in the first kick av surprise.
“I was evicted this mornin’,
as I’ve towld ye. Six years I’ve hung
me hat up in those same apartments in Bloomsbury;
and, till last year, aisy enough I found me landlord
over a quarter’s rent or two overjue. But
last midsummer year the house changed hands; and bedad
it began to be ‘pay or quit.’ This
day it was ‘quit.’ The new landlord
came up the stairs at the head av the ejectin’
army: I got up from breakfast to open the door
to um. I’d never set eyes on um
since I’d been his tenant. Bedad, it was
Jemmy!”
O’Driscoll paused, and poured
himself another glass of hock.
“So I suppose,” I said,
“you ran into each other’s arms, and kissed
again with tears?”
Then you suppose wrong, said he, and sat for a moment or
two silent, fingering the stem of his glass. Then he added, more gently -
“I looked in the face av
um, and said to meself, ’Jemmy doesn’t
remember me. If I introduce meself, I wonder what’ll
he do? Will he love me still, or will he turn
me out?’ An’ by the Lord I didn’t
care to risk ut! I couldn’t dare to
lose that last illusion; an’ so I put on me
hat an’ walked out, tellin’ him nothing
at all.”