Either we have been indulging in an
expensive mistake, or a great foreign novelist who
preaches the gospel of despair is locoed.
This word, which may be new to most
of our readers, has long been current in the Far West,
and is likely to be adopted into the language, and
become as indispensable as the typic words taboo and
tabooed, which Herman Melville gave us some forty
years ago. There grows upon the deserts and the
cattle ranges of the Rockies a plant of the leguminosae
family, with a purple blossom, which is called the
‘loco’. It is sweet to the taste;
horses and cattle are fond of it, and when they have
once eaten it they prefer it to anything else, and
often refuse other food. But the plant is poisonous,
or, rather, to speak exactly, it is a weed of insanity.
Its effect upon the horse seems to be mental quite
as much as physical. He behaves queerly, he is
full of whims; one would say he was “possessed.”
He takes freaks, he trembles, he will not go in certain
places, he will not pull straight, his mind is evidently
affected, he is mildly insane. In point of fact,
he is ruined; that is to say, he is ‘locoed’.
Further indulgence in the plant results in death, but
rarely does an animal recover from even one eating
of the insane weed.
The shepherd on the great sheep ranges
leads an absolutely isolated life. For weeks,
sometimes for months together, he does not see a human
being. His only companions are his dogs and the
three or four thousand sheep he is herding. All
day long, under the burning sun, he follows the herd
over the rainless prairie, as it nibbles here and
there the short grass and slowly gathers its food.
At night he drives the sheep back to the corral, and
lies down alone in his hut. He speaks to no one;
he almost forgets how to speak. Day and night
he hears no sound except the melancholy, monotonous
bleat, bleat of the sheep. It becomes intolerable.
The animal stupidity of the herd enters into him.
Gradually he loses his mind. They say that he
is locoed. The insane asylums of California contain
many shepherds.
But the word locoed has come to have
a wider application than to the poor shepherds or
the horses and cattle that have eaten the loco.
Any one who acts queerly, talks strangely, is visionary
without being actually a lunatic, who is what would
be called elsewhere a “crank,” is said
to be locoed. It is a term describing a shade
of mental obliquity and queerness something short
of irresponsible madness, and something more than
temporarily “rattled” or bewildered for
the moment. It is a good word, and needed to
apply to many people who have gone off into strange
ways, and behave as if they had eaten some insane
plant the insane plant being probably a
theory in the mazes of which they have wandered until
they are lost.
Perhaps the loco does not grow in
Russia, and the Prophet of Discouragement may never
have eaten of it; perhaps he is only like the shepherd,
mainly withdrawn from human intercourse and sympathy
in a morbid mental isolation, hearing only the bleat,
bleat, bleat of the ‘muxhiks’ in the dullness
of the steppes, wandering round in his own sated mind
until he has lost all clew to life. Whatever the
cause may be, clearly he is ‘locoed’.
All his theories have worked out to the conclusion
that the world is a gigantic mistake, love is nothing
but animality, marriage is immorality; according to
astronomical calculations this teeming globe and all
its life must end some time; and why not now?
There shall be no more marriage, no more children;
the present population shall wind up its affairs with
decent haste, and one by one quit the scene of their
failure, and avoid all the worry of a useless struggle.
This gospel of the blessedness of
extinction has come too late to enable us to profit
by it in our decennial enumeration. How different
the census would have been if taken in the spirit
of this new light! How much bitterness, how much
hateful rivalry would have been spared! We should
then have desired a reduction of the population, not
an increase of it. There would have been a pious
rivalry among all the towns and cities on the way
to the millennium of extinction to show the least number
of inhabitants; and those towns would have been happiest
which could exhibit not only a marked decline in numbers,
but the greater number of old people. Beautiful
St. Paul would have held a thanksgiving service, and
invited the Minneapolis enumerators to the feast, Kansas
City and St. Louis and San Francisco, and a hundred
other places, would not have desired a recount, except,
perhaps, for overestimate; they would not have said
that thousands were away at the sea or in the mountains,
but, on the contrary, that thousands who did not belong
there, attracted by the salubrity of the climate,
and the desire to injure the town’s reputation,
had crowded in there in census time. The newspapers,
instead of calling on people to send in the names
of the unenumerated, would have rejoiced at the small
returns, as they would have done if the census had
been for the purpose of levying the federal tax upon
each place according to its population. Chicago well,
perhaps the Prophet of the Steppes would have made
an exception of Chicago, and been cynically delighted
to push it on its way of increase, aggregation, and
ruin.
But instead of this, the strain of
anxiety was universal and heart-rending. So much
depended upon swelling the figures. The tension
would have been relieved if our faces were all set
towards extinction, and the speedy evacuation of this
unsatisfactory globe. The writer met recently,
in the Colorado desert of Arizona, a forlorn census-taker
who had been six weeks in the saddle, roaming over
the alkali plains in order to gratify the vanity of
Uncle Sam. He had lost his reckoning, and did
not know the day of the week or of the month.
In all the vast territory, away up to the Utah line,
over which he had wandered, he met human beings (excluding
“Indians and others not taxed “) so rarely
that he was in danger of being locoed. He was
almost in despair when, two days before, he had a
windfall, which raised his general average in the form
of a woman with twenty-six children, and he was rejoicing
that he should be able to turn in one hundred and
fifty people. Alas, the revenue the government
will derive from these half-nomads will never pay the
cost of enumerating them.
And, alas again, whatever good showing
we may make, we shall wish it were larger; the more
people we have the more we shall want. In this
direction there is no end, any more than there is
to life. If extinction, and not life and growth,
is the better rule, what a costly mistake we have been
making!