It was a very ugly bush indeed; that
is, so far as any thing in nature can be really ugly.
It was lopsided-having on the one hand
a stunted stump or two, while on the other a huge
heavy branch swept down to the gravel-walk.
It had a crooked gnarled trunk or stem, hollow enough
to entice any weak-minded bird to build a nest there-only
it was so near to the ground, and also to the garden
gate. Besides, the owners of the garden, evidently
of practical mind, had made use of it to place between
a fork in its branches a sort of letter-box-not
the government regulation one, for twenty years ago
this had not been thought of; but a rough receptacle,
where, the house being a good way off, letters might
be deposited, instead of; as hitherto, in a hole in
the trunk-near the foot of the tree, and
under shelter of its mass of evergreen leaves.
This letter-box; made by the boys
of the family at the instigation and with the assistance
of their tutor, had proved so attractive to some exceedingly
incautious sparrow that during the intervals of the
post she had begun a nest there, which was found by
the boys. Exceedingly wild boys they were, and
a great trouble to their old grandmother, with whom
they were staying the summer, and their young governess-“Misfortune,”
as they called her, her real name being Miss Williams-Fortune
Williams. The nickname was a little too near
the truth, as a keener observer than mischievous boys
would have read in her quiet, sometimes sad, face;
and it had been stopped rather severely by the tutor
of the elder boys, a young man whom the grandmother
had been forced to get, to “keep them in order!”
He was a Mr. Robert Roy, once a student, now a teacher
of the “humanities,” from the neighboring
town-I beg its pardon-city; and
a lovely old city it is!-of St. Andrews.
Thence he was in the habit of coming to them three
and often four days in the week, teaching of mornings
and walking of afternoons. They had expected
him this afternoon, but their grandmother had carried
them off on some pleasure excursion; and being a lady
of inexact habits-one, too, to whom tutors
were tutors and nothing more-she had merely
said to Miss Williams, as the carriage drove away,
“When Mr. Roy comes, tell him he is not wanted
till tomorrow.”
And so Miss Williams had waited at
the gate, not wishing him to have the additional trouble
of walking up to the house, for she knew every minute
of his time was precious. The poor and the hard-working
can understand and sympathize with one another.
Only a tutor and only a governess: Mrs. Dalziel
drove away and never thought of them again. They
were mere machines-servants to whom she
paid their wages, and so that they did sufficient
service to deserve these wages, she never interfered
with them, nor, indeed, wasted a moment’s consideration
upon them or their concerns.
Consequently they were in the somewhat
rare and peculiar position of a young man and young
woman (perhaps Mrs. Dalziel would have taken exception
to the words “young lady and young gentleman”)
thrown together day after day, week after week-nay,
it had now become month after month-to
all intents and purposes quite alone, except for the
children. They taught together, there being but
one school-room; walked out together, for the two
younger boys refused to be separated from their older
brothers; and, in short, spent two-thirds of their
existence together, without let or hindrance, comment
or observation, from any mortal soul.
I do not wish to make any mystery
in this story. A young woman of twenty-five
and a young man of thirty, both perfectly alone in
the world-orphans, without brother or sister-having
to earn their own bread, and earn it hardly, and being
placed in circumstances where they had every opportunity
of intimate friendship, sympathy, whatever you like
to call it: who could doubt what would happen?
The more so, as there was no one to suggest that
it might happen; no one to watch them or warn them,
or waken them with worldly-minded hints; or else to
rise up, after the fashion of so many wise parents
and guardians and well-intentioned friends, and indignantly
shut the stable door after the steed is stolen.
No. That something which was
so sure to happen had happened; you might have seen
it in their eyes, have heard it in the very tone of
their voices, though they still talked in a very commonplace
way, and still called each other “Miss Williams”
and “Mr. Roy.” In fact, their whole
demeanor to one another was characterized by the grave
and even formal decorum which was natural to very
reserved people, just trembling on the verge of that
discovery which will unlock the heart of each to the
other, and annihilate reserve forever between the
two whom Heaven has designed and meant to become one;
a completed existence. If by any mischance this
does not come about, each may lead a very creditable
and not unhappy life; but it will be a locked-up life,
one to which no third person is ever likely to find
the key.
Whether such natures are to envied
or pitied is more than I can say; but at least they
are more to be respected than the people who wear their
hearts upon their sleeves for daws to peck at, and
very often are all the prouder the more they are pecked
at, and the more elegantly they bleed; which was not
likely to be the case with either of these young folks,
young as they were.
They were young, and youth is always
interesting and even comely; but beyond that there
was nothing remarkable about either. He was Scotch;
she English, or rather Welsh. She had the clear
blue Welsh eye, the funny retrousee Welsh nose;
but with the prettiest little mouth underneath it-firm,
close, and sweet; full of sensitiveness, but a sensitiveness
that was controlled and guided by that best possession
to either man or woman, a good strong will.
No one could doubt that the young governess had, what
was a very useful thing to a governess, “a will
of her own;” but not a domineering or obnoxious
will, which indeed is seldom will at all, but merely
obstinacy.
For the rest, Miss Williams was a
little woman, or gave the impression of being so,
from her slight figure and delicate hands and feet.
I doubt if any one would have called her pretty,
until he or she had learned to love her. For
there are two distinct kinds of love, one in which
the eye instructs the heart, and the other in which
the heart informs and guides the eye. There
have been men who, seeing an unknown beautiful face,
have felt sure it implied the most beautiful soul
in the world, pursued it, worshiped it, wooed and
won it, found the fancy true, and loved the woman
forever. Other men there are who would simply
say, “I don’t know if such a one is handsome
or not; I only know she is herself-and mine.”
Both loves are good; nay, it is difficult to say
which is best. But the latter would be the most
likely to any one who became attached to Fortune Williams.
Also, perhaps to Robert Roy, though
no one expects good looks in his sex; indeed, they
are mostly rather objectionable. Women do not
usually care for a very handsome man; and men are
prone to set him down as conceited. No one could
lay either charge to Mr. Roy. He was only an
honest-looking Scotchman, tall and strong and manly.
Not “red,” in spite of his name, but
dark-skinned and dark-haired; in no way resembling
his great namesake, Rob Roy Macgregor, as the boys
sometimes called him behind his back-never
to his face. Gentle as the young man was, there
was something about him which effectually prevented
any one’s taking the smallest liberty with him.
Though he had been a teacher of boys ever since he
was seventeen-and I have heard one of the
fraternity confess that it is almost impossible to
be a school-master for ten years without becoming
a tyrant-still it was a pleasant and sweet-tempered
face. Very far from a weak face, though; when
Mr. Roy said a thing must be done, every one of his
boys knew it must be done, and there was no
use saying any more about it.
He had unquestionably that rare gift,
the power of authority; though this did not necessarily
imply self-control; for some people can rule every
body except themselves. But Robert Roy’s
clear, calm, rather sad eye, and a certain patient
expression about the mouth, implied that he too had
enough of the hard training of life to be able to govern
himself. And that is more difficult to a man
than to a woman.
“all thy passions, matched
with mine,
Are as moonlight unto sunlight,
and as water unto wine.”
A truth which even Fortune’s
tender heart did not fully take in, deep as was her
sympathy for him; for his toilsome, lonely life, lived
more in shadow than in sunshine, and with every temptation
to the selfishness which is so apt to follow self-dependence,
and the bitterness that to a proud spirit so often
makes the sting of poverty. Yet he was neither
selfish nor bitter; only a little reserved, silent,
and-except with children-rather
grave.
She stood watching him now, for she
could see him a long way off across the level Links,
and noticed that he stopped more than once to look
at the golf-players. He was a capital golfer
himself, but had never any time to play. Between
his own studies and the teaching by which he earned
the money to prosecute them, every hour was filled
up. So he turned his back on the pleasant pastime,
which seems to have such an extraordinary fascination
for those who pursue it, and came on to his daily
work, with that resolute deliberate step, bent on going
direct to his point and turning aside for nothing.
Fortune knew it well by this time;
had learned to distinguish it from all others in the
world. There are some footsteps which, by a pardonable
poetical license, we say “we should hear in our
graves,” and though this girl did not think
of that, for death looked far off, and she was scarcely
a poetical person, still, many a morning, when, sitting
at her school-room window, she heard Mr. Roy coming
steadily down the gravel-walk, she was conscious of-something
that people can not feel twice in a life-time.
And now, when he approached with that
kind smile of his, which brightened into double pleasure
when he saw who was waiting for him, she was aware
of a wild heartbeat, a sense of exceeding joy, and
then of relief and rest. He was “comfortable”
to her. She could express it in no other way.
At sight of his face and at sound of his voice all
worldly cares and troubles, of which she had a good
many, seemed to fall off. To be with him was
like having an arm to lean on, a light to walk by;
and she had walked alone so long.
“Good-afternoon, Miss Williams.”
“Good-afternoon, Mr. Roy.”
They said no more than that, but the
stupidest person in the world might have seen that
they were glad to meet, glad to be together.
Though neither they nor any one else could have explained
the mysterious fact, the foundation of all love stories
in books or in life-and which the present
author owns, after having written many books and seen
a great deal of life, is to her also as great a mystery
as ever-Why do certain people like to be
together? What is the inexplicable attraction
which makes them seek one another, suit one another,
put up with one another’s weaknesses, condone
one another’s faults (when neither are too great
to lessen love), and to the last day of life find
a charm in one another’s society which extends
to no other human being. Happy love or lost love,
a full world or an empty world, life with joy or life
without it-that is all the difference.
Which some people think very small, and that does
not matter; and perhaps it does not-to many
people. But it does to some, and I incline to
put in that category Miss Williams and Mr. Roy.
They stood by the laurel bush, having
just shaken hands more hastily than they usually did;
but the absence of the children, and the very unusual
fact of their being quite alone, gave to both a certain
shyness, and she had drawn her hand away, saying,
with a slight blush:
“Mrs. Dalziel desired me to
meet you and tell you that you might have a holiday
today. She has taken her boys with her to Elie.
I dare say you will not be sorry to gain an hour
or two for yourself; though I am sorry you should
have the trouble of the walk for nothing.”
“For nothing?”-with
the least shadow of a smile, not of annoyance, certainly.
“Indeed, I would have let you
know if I could, but she decided at the very last
minute; and if I had proposed that a messenger should
have been sent to stop you, I am afraid-it
would not have been answered.”
“Of course not;” and they
interchanged an amused look-these fellow-victims
to the well-known ways of the household-which,
however, neither grumbled at; it was merely an outside
thing, this treatment of both as mere tutor and governess.
After all (as he sometimes said, when some special
rudeness-not himself, but to her-vexed
him), they were tutor and governess; but they were
something else besides; something which, the instant
their chains were lifted off, made them feel free and
young and strong, and comforted them with comfort unspeakable.
“She bade me apologize.
No, I am afraid, if I tell the absolute truth, she
did not bid me, but I do apologize.”
“What for, Miss Williams?”
“For your having been brought out all this way
just to go back again.”
“I do not mind it, I assure you.”
“And as for the lost lesson-”
“The boys will not mourn over
it, I dare say. In fact, their term with me
is so soon coming to an end that it does not signify
much. They told me they are going back to England
to school next week. Do you go back too?”
“Not just yet-not
till next Christmas. Mrs. Dalziel talks of wintering
in London; but she is so vague in her plans that I
am never sure from one week to another what she will
do.”
“And what are your plans? You always
know what you intend to do.”
“Yes, I think so,” answered
Miss Williams, smiling. “One of the few
things I remember of my mother was hearing her say
of me, that ’her little girl was a little girl
who always knew her own mind.’ I think
I do. I may not be always able to carry it out,
but I think I know it.”
“Of course,” said Mr.
Roy, absently and somewhat vaguely, as he stood beside
the laurel bush, pulling one of its shiny leaves to
pieces, and looking right ahead, across the sunshiny
Links, the long shore of yellow sands, where the mermaids
might well delight to come and “take hands”-to
the smooth, dazzling, far-away sea. No sea is
more beautiful than that at St. Andrews.
Its sleepy glitter seemed to have
lulled Robert Roy into a sudden meditation, of which
no word of his companion came to rouse him. In
truth, she, never given much to talking, simply stood,
as she often did, silently beside him, quite satisfied
with the mere comfort of his presence.
I am afraid that this Fortune Williams
will be considered a very weak-minded young woman.
She was not a bit a coquette, she had not the slightest
wish to flirt with any man. Nor was she a proud
beauty desirous to subjugate the other sex; and drag
them triumphantly at her chariot wheels. She
did not see the credit, or the use, or the pleasure
of any such proceeding. She was a self-contained,
self-dependent woman. Thoroughly a woman; not
indifferent at all to womanhood’s best blessing;
still she could live without it if necessary, as she
could have lived without anything which it had pleased
God to deny her. She was not a creature likely
to die for love, or do wrong for love, which some people
think the only test of love’s strength, instead
of its utmost weakness; but that she was capable of
love, for all her composure and quietness, capable
of it, and ready for it, in its intensest, most passionate,
and most enduring form, the God who made her knew,
if no one else did.
Her time would come; indeed, had come
already. She had too much self-respect to let
him guess it, but I am afraid she was very fond of-or,
if that is a foolish phrase, deeply attached to-Robert
Roy. He had been so good to her, at once strong
and tender, chivalrous, respectful, and kind; and
she had no father, no brother, no other man at all
to judge him by, except the accidental men whom she
had met in society, creatures on two legs who wore
coats and trousers, who had been civil to her, as
she to them, but who had never interested her in the
smallest degree, perhaps because she knew so little
of them. But no; it would have been just the
same had she known them a thousand years. She
was not “a man’s woman,” that is,
one of those women who feel interested in any thing
in the shape of a man, and make men interested in them
accordingly, for the root of much masculine affection
is pure vanity. That celebrated Scottish song,
“Come deaf, or come blind,
or come cripple,
O come, ony ane o’ them a’!
Far better be married to something,
Than no to be married ava,”
was a rhyme that would never have
touched the stony heart of Fortune Williams.
And yet, let me own it once more, she was very, very
fond of Robert Roy. He had never spoken to her
one word of love, actual love, no more than he spoke
now, as they stood side by side, looking with the same
eyes on the same scene. I say the same eyes,
for they were exceedingly alike in their tastes.
There was no need ever to go into long explanations
about this or that; a glance sufficed, or a word, to
show each what the other enjoyed; and both had the
quiet conviction that they were enjoying it together.
Now as that sweet, still, sunshiny view met their
mutual gaze, they fell into no poetical raptures, but
just stood and looked, taking it all in with exceeding
pleasure, as they had done many and many a time, but
never, it seemed, so perfectly as now.
“What a lovely afternoon!” she said at
last.
“Yes. It is a pity to
waste it. Have you any thing special to do?
What did you mean to employ yourself with, now your
birds are flown?”
“Oh, I can always find something to do.”
“But need you find it?
We both work so hard. If we could only now and
then have a little bit of pleasure!”
He put it so simply, yet almost with
a sigh. This poor girl’s heart responded
to it suddenly, wildly. She was only twenty-five,
yet sometimes she felt quite old, or rather as if
she had never been young. The constant teaching,
teaching of rough boys too-for she had had
the whole four till Mr. Roy took the two elder off
her hands-the necessity of grinding hard
out of school hours to keep herself up in Latin, Euclid,
and other branches which do not usually form a part
of a feminine education, only having a great natural
love of work, she had taught herself-all
these things combined to make her life a dull life,
a hard life, till Robert Roy came into it. And
sometimes even now the desperate craving to enjoy-not
only to endure, but to enjoy-to take a little
of the natural pleasures of her age-came
to the poor governess very sorely, especially on days
such as this, when all the outward world looked so
gay, so idle, and she worked so hard.
So did Robert Roy. Life was
not easier to him than to herself; she knew that;
and when he said, half joking, as if he wanted to feel
his way, “Let us imitate our boys, and take
a half holiday,” she only laughed, but did not
refuse.
How could she refuse? There
were the long smooth sands on either side the Eden,
stretching away into indefinite distance, with not
a human being upon them to break their loneliness,
or, if there was, he or she looked a mere dot, not
human at all. Even if these two had been afraid
of being seen walking together-which they
hardly were, being too unimportant for any one to
care whether they were friends or lovers, or what
not-there was nobody to see them, except
in the character of two black dots on the yellow sands.
“It is low water; suppose we
go and look for sea-anémones. One of my
pupils wants some, and I promised to try and find one
the first spare hour I had.”
“But we shall not find anémones on the
sands.”
“Shells, then, you practical
woman! We’ll gather shells. It will
be all the same to that poor invalid boy-and
to me,” added he, with that involuntary sigh
which she had noticed more than once, and which had
begun to strike on her ears not quite painfully.
Sighs, when we are young, mean differently to what
they do in after-years. “I don’t
care very much where I go, or what I do; I only want-well,
to be happy for an hour, if Providence will let me.”
“Why should not Providence let
you?” said Fortune, gently. “Few
people deserve it more.”
“You are kind to think so; but
you are always kind to every body.”
By this time they had left their position
by the laurel bush, and were walking along side by
side, according as he had suggested. This silent,
instinctive acquiescence in what he wished done-it
had happened once or twice before, startling her a
little at herself; for, as I have said, Miss Williams
was not at all the kind of person to do every thing
that every body asked her, without considering whether
it was right or wrong. She could obey, but it
would depend entirely upon whom she had to obey, which,
indeed, makes the sole difference between loving disciples
and slavish fools.
It was a lovely day, one of those
serene autumn days peculiar to Scotland-I
was going to say Saint Andrews; and any one who knows
the ancient city will know exactly how it looks in
the still, strongly spiritualized light of such an
afternoon, with the ruins, the castle, cathedral,
and St. Regulus’s tower standing out sharply
against the intensely blue sky, and on the other side-on
both sides-the yellow sweep of sand curving
away into the distance, and melting into the sunshiny
sea.
Many a time, in their prescribed walks
with their young tribe, Miss Williams and Mr. Roy
had taken this stroll across the Links and round by
the sands to the mouth of the Eden, leaving behind
them a long and sinuous track of many footsteps, little
and large, but now there were only two lines-“foot-prints
on the sands of Time,” as he jestingly called
them, turning round and pointing to the marks of the
dainty feet that walked so steadily and straightly
beside his own.
“They seem made to go together,
those two tracks,” said he.
Why did he say it? Was he the
kind of man to talk thus without meaning it?
If so, alas! she was not exactly the woman to be thus
talked to. Nothing fell on her lightly.
Perhaps it was her misfortune, perhaps even her fault,
but so it was.
Robert Roy did not “make love;”
not at all. Possibly he never could have done
it in the ordinary way. Sweet things, polite
things were very difficult to him either to do or
to say. Even the tenderness that was in him
came out as if by accident; but, oh! how infinitely
tender he could be! Enough to make any one who
loved him die easily, quietly, if only just holding
his hand.
There is an incident in Dickens’s
touching Tale of two Cities, where a young
man going innocent to the guillotine, and riding on
the death-cart with a young girl whom he had never
before seen, is able to sustain and comfort her, even
to the last awful moment, by the look of his face and
the clasp of his hand. That man, I have often
thought, must have been something not unlike Robert
Roy.
Such men are rare, but they do exist;
and it was Fortune’s lot, or she believed it
was, to have found one. That was enough.
She went along the shining sands in a dream of perfect
content, perfect happiness, thinking-and
was it strange or wrong that she should so think?-that
if it were God’s will she should thus walk through
life, the thorniest path would seem smooth, the hardest
road easy. She had no fear of life, if lived
beside him; or of death-love is stronger
than death; at least this sort of love, of which only
strong natures are capable, and out of which are made,
not the lyrics, perhaps, but the epics, the psalms,
or the tragedies of our mortal existence.
I have explained thus much about these
two friends-lovers that may be, or might
have been-because they never would have
done it themselves. Neither was given to much
speaking. Indeed, I fear their conversation
this day, if recorded, would have been of the most
feeble kind-brief, fragmentary, mere comments
on the things about them, or abstract remarks not
particularly clever or brilliant. They were neither
of them what you would call brilliant people; yet
they were happy, and the hours flew by like a few
minutes, until they found themselves back again beside
the laurel bush at the gate, when Mr. Roy suddenly
said:
“Do not go in yet. I mean,
need you go in? It is scarcely past sunset;
the boys will not be home for an hour yet; they don’t
want you, and I-I want you so. In
your English sense,” he added, with a laugh,
referring to one of their many arguments, scholastic
or otherwise, wherein she had insisted that to want
meant Anglice, to wish or to crave, whereas
in Scotland it was always used like the French manquer,
to miss or to need.
“Shall we begin that fight over
again?” asked she, smiling; for every thing,
even fighting, seemed pleasant today.
“No, I have no wish to fight;
I want to consult you seriously on a purely personal
matter, if you would not mind taking that trouble.”
Fortune looked sorry. That was
one of the bad things in him (the best man alive have
their bad things), the pride which apes humility, the
self-distrust which often wounds another so keenly.
Her answer was given with a grave and simple sincerity
that ought to have been reproach enough.
“Mr. Roy, I would not mind any
amount of trouble if I could be of use to you; you
know that.”
“Forgive me! Yes, I do
know it. I believe in you and your goodness to
the very bottom of my heart.”
She tried to say “Thank you,”
but her lips refused to utter a word. It was
so difficult to go on talking like ordinary friends,
when she knew, and he must know she knew, that one
more word would make them-not friends at
all-something infinitely better, closer,
dearer; but that word was his to speak, not hers.
There are women who will “help a man on”-propose
to him, marry him indeed-while he is under
the pleasing delusion that he does it all himself;
but Fortune Williams was not one of these. She
remained silent and passive, waiting for the next thing
he should say. It came: something the shock
of which she never forgot as long as she lived; and
he said it with his eyes on her face, so that, if
it killed her, she must keep quiet and composed, as
she did.
“You know the boys’ lessons
end next week. The week after I go-that
is, I have almost decided to go-to India.”
“To India!”
“Yes, For which, no doubt,
you think me very changeable, having said so often
that I meant to keep to a scholar’s life, and
be a professor one day, perhaps, if by any means I
could get salt to my porridge. Well, now I am
not satisfied with salt to my porridge; I wish to get
rich.”
She did not say, “Why?”
She thought she had not looked it; but he answered:
“Never mind why. I do wish it, and I will
be rich yet, if I can. Are you very much surprised?”
Surprised she certainly was; but she
answered, honestly, “Indeed, you are the last
person I should suspect of being worldly-minded.”
“Thank you; that is kind.
No, just; merely just. One ought to have faith
in people; I am afraid my own deficiency is want of
faith. It takes so much to make me believe for
a moment that any one cares for me.”
How hard it was to be silent-harder
still to speak! But she did not speak.
“I can understand that; I have
often felt the same. It is the natural consequence
of a very lonely life. If you and I had had fathers
and mothers and brothers and sisters, we might have
been different.”
“Perhaps so. But about
India. For a long time-that is, for
many weeks-I have been casting about in
my mind how to change my way of life, to look out
for something that would help me to earn money, and
quickly, but there seemed no chance whatever.
Until suddenly one has opened.”
And then he explained how the father
of one of one of his pupils, grateful for certain
benefits, which Mr. Roy did not specify, and noticing
certain business qualities in him-“which
I suppose I have, though I didn’t know it,”
added he, with a smile-had offered him a
situation in a merchant’s office at Calcutta:
a position of great trust and responsibility, for
three years certain, with the option of then giving
it up or continuing it.
“And continuing means making
a fortune. Even three years means making something,
with my ‘stingy’ habits. Only I must
go at once. Nor is there any time left me for
my decision; it must be yes or no. Which shall
it be?”
The sudden appeal-made,
too, as if though it was nothing-that terrible
yes or no, which to her made all the difference of
living or only half living, of feeling the sun in
or out of the world. What could she answer?
What could she answer? Trembling violently, she
yet answered, in a steady voice, “You must decide
for yourself. A woman can not understand a man.”
“Nor a man a woman, thoroughly.
There is only one thing which helps both to comprehend
one another.”
One thing! she knew what it was.
Surely so did he. But that strange distrustfulness
of which he had spoken, or the hesitation which the
strongest and bravest men have at times, came between.
“Oh, the little more, and
how much it is!
Oh, the little less, and what worlds
away!”
If, instead of looking vaguely out
upon the sea, he had looked into this poor girl’s
face; if, instead of keeping silence, he had only spoken
one word! But he neither looked nor spoke, and
the moment passed by. And there are some moments
which people would sometimes give a whole lifetime
to recall and use differently; but in vain.
“My engagement is only for three
years,” he resumed; “and, if alive, I
mean to come back. Dead or alive, I was going
to say, but you would not care to see my ghost, I
presume? I beg your pardon: I ought not
to make a joke of such serious things.”
“No, you ought not.”
She felt herself almost speechless,
that in another minute she might burst into sobs.
He saw it-at least he saw a very little
of it, and misinterpreted the rest.
“I have tired you. Take
my arm. You will soon be at home now.”
Then, after a pause, “You will not be displeased
at any thing I have said? We part friends?
No, we do not part; I shall see you every day for
a week, and be able to tell you all particulars of
my journey, if you care to hear.”
“Thank you, yes-I do care.”
They stood together, arm in arm.
The dews were falling; a sweet, soft lilac haze had
begun to creep over the sea-the solemn;
far-away sea that he was so soon to cross. Involuntarily
she clung to his arm. So near, yet so apart!
Why must it be? She could have borne his going
away, if it was for his good, if he wished it; and
something whispered to her that this sudden desire
to get rich was not for himself alone. But, oh!
If he would only speak! One word-one
little word! After that, any thing might come-the
separation of life, the bitterness of death.
To the two hearts that had once opened each to each,
in the full recognition of mutual love, there could
never more be any real parting.
But that one word he did not say.
He only took the little hand that lay on his arm
and pressed it, and held it-years after,
the feeling of that clasp was as fresh on her fingers
as yesterday-the hearing the foot of some
accidental passer-by, he let it go, and did not take
it again.
Just at this moment the sound of distant
carriage wheels was heard.
“That must be Mrs. Dalziel and the boys.”
“Then I had better go. Good-by”
The daydream was over. It had
all come back again-the forlorn, dreary,
hard-working world.
“Good-by, Mr. Roy.” And they shook
hands.
“One word,” he said hastily.
“I shall write to you-you will allow
me?-and I shall see you several times, a
good many times before I go?”
“I hope so.”
“Then, for the present, good-by.
That means,” he added, earnestly, “‘God
be with you!’ And I know he always will.”
In another minute Fortune found herself
standing beside the laurel bush, alone, listening
to the sound of Mr. Roy’s footsteps down the
road-listening, listening, as if, with the
exceeding tension, her brain would burst.
The carriage came, passed by; it was
not Mrs. Dalziel’s after all. She thought
he might discover this, and come back again; so she
waited a little-five minutes, ten-beside
the laurel bush. But he did not come. No
footstep, no voice; nothing but the faint, far-away
sound of the long waves washing in upon the sands.
It was not the brain that felt like
to burst now, but the heart. She clasped her
hands above her head. It did not matter; there
was no creature to see or hear that appeal-was
it to man or God?-that wild, broken sob,
so contrary to her usual self-controlled and self-contained
nature. And then she learned her forehead against
the gate, just where Robert Roy had accidentally laid
his hand in opening it, and wept bitterly.