But Lucy had developed since the spring.
That is to say, she was now better able to stifle
the emotions of which the conventions and the world
disapprove. Though the danger was greater, she
was not shaken by deep sobs. She said to Cecil,
“I am not coming in to tea-tell mother-I
must write some letters,” and went up to her
room. Then she prepared for action. Love
felt and returned, love which our bodies exact and
our hearts have transfigured, love which is the most
real thing that we shall ever meet, reappeared now
as the world’s enemy, and she must stifle it.
She sent for Miss Bartlett.
The contest lay not between love and
duty. Perhaps there never is such a contest.
It lay between the real and the pretended, and Lucy’s
first aim was to defeat herself. As her brain
clouded over, as the memory of the views grew dim
and the words of the book died away, she returned to
her old shibboleth of nerves. She “conquered
her breakdown.” Tampering with the truth,
she forgot that the truth had ever been. Remembering
that she was engaged to Cecil, she compelled herself
to confused remembrances of George; he was nothing
to her; he never had been anything; he had behaved
abominably; she had never encouraged him. The
armour of falsehood is subtly wrought out of darkness,
and hides a man not only from others, but from his
own soul. In a few moments Lucy was equipped
for battle.
“Something too awful has happened,”
she began, as soon as her cousin arrived. “Do
you know anything about Miss Lavish’s novel?”
Miss Bartlett looked surprised, and
said that she had not read the book, nor known that
it was published; Eleanor was a reticent woman at heart.
“There is a scene in it.
The hero and heroine make love. Do you know about
that?”
“Dear ?”
“Do you know about it, please?”
she repeated. “They are on a hillside,
and Florence is in the distance.”
“My good Lucia, I am all at
sea. I know nothing about it whatever.”
“There are violets. I cannot
believe it is a coincidence. Charlotte, Charlotte,
how could you have told her? I have thought before
speaking; it must be you.”
“Told her what?” she asked, with growing
agitation.
“About that dreadful afternoon in February.”
Miss Bartlett was genuinely moved.
“Oh, Lucy, dearest girl-she hasn’t
put that in her book?”
Lucy nodded.
“Not so that one could recognize it. Yes.”
“Then never-never-never
more shall Eleanor Lavish be a friend of mine.”
“So you did tell?”
“I did just happen-when
I had tea with her at Rome-in the course
of conversation-
“But Charlotte-what
about the promise you gave me when we were packing?
Why did you tell Miss Lavish, when you wouldn’t
even let me tell mother?”
“I will never forgive Eleanor.
She has betrayed my confidence.”
“Why did you tell her, though?
This is a most serious thing.”
Why does any one tell anything?
The question is eternal, and it was not surprising
that Miss Bartlett should only sigh faintly in response.
She had done wrong-she admitted it, she
only hoped that she had not done harm; she had told
Eleanor in the strictest confidence.
Lucy stamped with irritation.
“Cecil happened to read out
the passage aloud to me and to Mr. Emerson; it upset
Mr. Emerson and he insulted me again. Behind Cecil’s
back. Ugh! Is it possible that men are such
brutes? Behind Cecil’s back as we were
walking up the garden.”
Miss Bartlett burst into self-accusations and regrets.
“What is to be done now? Can you tell me?”
“Oh, Lucy-I shall
never forgive myself, never to my dying day. Fancy
if your prospects-
“I know,” said Lucy, wincing
at the word. “I see now why you wanted me
to tell Cecil, and what you meant by ‘some other
source.’ You knew that you had told Miss
Lavish, and that she was not reliable.”
It was Miss Bartlett’s turn
to wince. “However,” said the girl,
despising her cousin’s shiftiness, “What’s
done’s done. You have put me in a most
awkward position. How am I to get out of it?”
Miss Bartlett could not think.
The days of her energy were over. She was a visitor,
not a chaperon, and a discredited visitor at that.
She stood with clasped hands while the girl worked
herself into the necessary rage.
“He must-that man
must have such a setting down that he won’t forget.
And who’s to give it him? I can’t
tell mother now-owing to you. Nor
Cecil, Charlotte, owing to you. I am caught up
every way. I think I shall go mad. I have
no one to help me. That’s why I’ve
sent for you. What’s wanted is a man with
a whip.”
Miss Bartlett agreed - one wanted a man with a
whip.
“Yes-but it’s
no good agreeing. What’s to be done.
We women go maundering on. What does a girl
do when she comes across a cad?”
“I always said he was a cad,
dear. Give me credit for that, at all events.
From the very first moment-when he said
his father was having a bath.”
“Oh, bother the credit and who’s
been right or wrong! We’ve both made a
muddle of it. George Emerson is still down the
garden there, and is he to be left unpunished, or
isn’t he? I want to know.”
Miss Bartlett was absolutely helpless.
Her own exposure had unnerved her, and thoughts were
colliding painfully in her brain. She moved feebly
to the window, and tried to detect the cad’s
white flannels among the laurels.
“You were ready enough at the
Bertolini when you rushed me off to Rome. Can’t
you speak again to him now?”
“Willingly would I move heaven and earth-
“I want something more definite,”
said Lucy contemptuously. “Will you speak
to him? It is the least you can do, surely, considering
it all happened because you broke your word.”
“Never again shall Eleanor Lavish be a friend
of mine.”
Really, Charlotte was outdoing herself.
“Yes or no, please; yes or no.”
“It is the kind of thing that
only a gentleman can settle.” George Emerson
was coming up the garden with a tennis ball in his
hand.
“Very well,” said Lucy,
with an angry gesture. “No one will help
me. I will speak to him myself.” And
immediately she realized that this was what her cousin
had intended all along.
“Hullo, Emerson!” called
Freddy from below. “Found the lost ball?
Good man! Want any tea?” And there was
an irruption from the house on to the terrace.
“Oh, Lucy, but that is brave of you! I
admire you-
They had gathered round George, who
beckoned, she felt, over the rubbish, the sloppy thoughts,
the furtive yearnings that were beginning to cumber
her soul. Her anger faded at the sight of him.
Ah! The Emersons were fine people in their way.
She had to subdue a rush in her blood before saying:
“Freddy has taken him into the
dining-room. The others are going down the garden.
Come. Let us get this over quickly. Come.
I want you in the room, of course.”
“Lucy, do you mind doing it?”
“How can you ask such a ridiculous question?”
“Poor Lucy-”
She stretched out her hand. “I seem to bring
nothing but misfortune wherever I go.”
Lucy nodded. She remembered their last evening
at Florence-the packing, the candle, the
shadow of Miss Bartlett’s toque on the door.
She was not to be trapped by pathos a second time.
Eluding her cousin’s caress, she led the way
downstairs.
“Try the jam,” Freddy was saying.
“The jam’s jolly good.”
George, looking big and dishevelled,
was pacing up and down the dining-room. As she
entered he stopped, and said:
“No-nothing to eat.”
“You go down to the others,”
said Lucy; “Charlotte and I will give Mr. Emerson
all he wants. Where’s mother?”
“She’s started on her Sunday writing.
She’s in the drawing-room.”
“That’s all right. You go away.”
He went off singing.
Lucy sat down at the table. Miss
Bartlett, who was thoroughly frightened, took up a
book and pretended to read.
She would not be drawn into an elaborate
speech. She just said - “I can’t
have it, Mr. Emerson. I cannot even talk to you.
Go out of this house, and never come into it again
as long as I live here-” flushing
as she spoke and pointing to the door. “I
hate a row. Go please.”
“What-
“No discussion.”
“But I can’t-
She shook her head. “Go, please. I
do not want to call in Mr. Vyse.”
“You don’t mean,”
he said, absolutely ignoring Miss Bartlett-“you
don’t mean that you are going to marry that
man?”
The line was unexpected.
She shrugged her shoulders, as if
his vulgarity wearied her. “You are merely
ridiculous,” she said quietly.
Then his words rose gravely over hers:
“You cannot live with Vyse. He’s
only for an acquaintance. He is for society and
cultivated talk. He should know no one intimately,
least of all a woman.”
It was a new light on Cecil’s character.
“Have you ever talked to Vyse without feeling
tired?”
“I can scarcely discuss-
“No, but have you ever?
He is the sort who are all right so long as they keep
to things-books, pictures-but
kill when they come to people. That’s why
I’ll speak out through all this muddle even now.
It’s shocking enough to lose you in any case,
but generally a man must deny himself joy, and I would
have held back if your Cecil had been a different
person. I would never have let myself go.
But I saw him first in the National Gallery, when
he winced because my father mispronounced the names
of great painters. Then he brings us here, and
we find it is to play some silly trick on a kind neighbour.
That is the man all over-playing tricks
on people, on the most sacred form of life that he
can find. Next, I meet you together, and find
him protecting and teaching you and your mother to
be shocked, when it was for you to settle whether
you were shocked or no. Cecil all over again.
He daren’t let a woman decide. He’s
the type who’s kept Europe back for a thousand
years. Every moment of his life he’s forming
you, telling you what’s charming or amusing
or ladylike, telling you what a man thinks womanly;
and you, you of all women, listen to his voice instead
of to your own. So it was at the Rectory, when
I met you both again; so it has been the whole of
this afternoon. Therefore-not ‘therefore
I kissed you,’ because the book made me do that,
and I wish to goodness I had more self-control.
I’m not ashamed. I don’t apologize.
But it has frightened you, and you may not have noticed
that I love you. Or would you have told me to
go, and dealt with a tremendous thing so lightly?
But therefore-therefore I settled to fight
him.”
Lucy thought of a very good remark.
“You say Mr. Vyse wants me to
listen to him, Mr. Emerson. Pardon me for suggesting
that you have caught the habit.”
And he took the shoddy reproof and touched it into
immortality. He said:
“Yes, I have,” and sank
down as if suddenly weary. “I’m the
same kind of brute at bottom. This desire to
govern a woman-it lies very deep, and men
and women must fight it together before they shall
enter the garden. But I do love you surely in
a better way than he does.” He thought.
“Yes-really in a better way.
I want you to have your own thoughts even when I hold
you in my arms,” He stretched them towards her.
“Lucy, be quick-there’s no
time for us to talk now-come to me as you
came in the spring, and afterwards I will be gentle
and explain. I have cared for you since that
man died. I cannot live without you, ‘No
good,’ I thought; ‘she is marrying some
one else’; but I meet you again when all the
world is glorious water and sun. As you came through
the wood I saw that nothing else mattered. I
called. I wanted to live and have my chance of
joy.”
“And Mr. Vyse?” said Lucy,
who kept commendably calm. “Does he not
matter? That I love Cecil and shall be his wife
shortly? A detail of no importance, I suppose?”
But he stretched his arms over the table towards her.
“May I ask what you intend to gain by this exhibition?”
He said - “It is our last
chance. I shall do all that I can.”
And as if he had done all else, he turned to Miss
Bartlett, who sat like some portent against the skies
of the evening. “You wouldn’t stop
us this second time if you understood,” he said.
“I have been into the dark, and I am going back
into it, unless you will try to understand.”
Her long, narrow head drove backwards
and forwards, as though demolishing some invisible
obstacle. She did not answer.
“It is being young,” he
said quietly, picking up his racquet from the floor
and preparing to go. “It is being certain
that Lucy cares for me really. It is that love
and youth matter intellectually.”
In silence the two women watched him.
His last remark, they knew, was nonsense, but was
he going after it or not? Would not he, the cad,
the charlatan, attempt a more dramatic finish?
No. He was apparently content. He left them,
carefully closing the front door; and when they looked
through the hall window, they saw him go up the drive
and begin to climb the slopes of withered fern behind
the house. Their tongues were loosed, and they
burst into stealthy rejoicings.
“Oh, Lucia-come back here-oh,
what an awful man!”
Lucy had no reaction-at
least, not yet. “Well, he amuses me,”
she said. “Either I’m mad, or else
he is, and I’m inclined to think it’s the
latter. One more fuss through with you, Charlotte.
Many thanks. I think, though, that this is the
last. My admirer will hardly trouble me again.”
And Miss Bartlett, too, essayed the roguish:
“Well, it isn’t every
one who could boast such a conquest, dearest, is it?
Oh, one oughtn’t to laugh, really. It might
have been very serious. But you were so sensible
and brave-so unlike the girls of my day.”
“Let’s go down to them.”
But, once in the open air, she paused.
Some emotion-pity, terror, love, but the
emotion was strong-seized her, and she was
aware of autumn. Summer was ending, and the evening
brought her odours of decay, the more pathetic because
they were reminiscent of spring. That something
or other mattered intellectually? A leaf, violently
agitated, danced past her, while other leaves lay
motionless. That the earth was hastening to re-enter
darkness, and the shadows of those trees over Windy
Corner?
“Hullo, Lucy! There’s
still light enough for another set, if you two’ll
hurry.”
“Mr. Emerson has had to go.”
“What a nuisance! That
spoils the four. I say, Cecil, do play, do, there’s
a good chap. It’s Floyd’s last day.
Do play tennis with us, just this once.”
Cecil’s voice came - “My
dear Freddy, I am no athlete. As you well remarked
this very morning, ’There are some chaps who
are no good for anything but books’; I plead
guilty to being such a chap, and will not inflict
myself on you.”
The scales fell from Lucy’s
eyes. How had she stood Cecil for a moment?
He was absolutely intolerable, and the same evening
she broke off her engagement.