This is the story of one of the most
far-reaching and influentially naughty things we ever
did in our lives. We did not mean to do such
a deed. And yet we did do it. These things
will happen with the best-regulated consciences.
The story of this rash and fatal act
is intimately involved which means all
mixed up anyhow with a private affair of
Oswald’s, and the one cannot be revealed without
the other. Oswald does not particularly want
his story to be remembered, but he wishes to tell the
truth, and perhaps it is what father calls a wholesome
discipline to lay bare the awful facts.
It was like this.
On Alice’s and Noel’s
birthday we went on the river for a picnic. Before
that we had not known that there was a river so near
us. Afterwards father said he wished we had been
allowed to remain on our pristine ignorance, whatever
that is. And perhaps the dark hour did dawn when
we wished so too. But a truce to vain regrets.
It was rather a fine thing in birthdays.
The uncle sent a box of toys and sweets, things that
were like a vision from another and a brighter world.
Besides that Alice had a knife, a pair of shut-up scissors,
a silk handkerchief, a book it was The
Golden Age and is Ai except where it gets mixed with
grown-up nonsense. Also a work-case lined with
pink plush, a boot-bag, which no one in their senses
would use because it had flowers in wool all over
it. And she had a box of chocolates and a musical
box that played ‘The Man who broke’ and
two other tunes, and two pairs of kid gloves for church,
and a box of writing-paper pink with
‘Alice’ on it in gold writing, and an egg
coloured red that said ’A. Bastable’
in ink on one side. These gifts were the offerings
of Oswald, Dora, Dicky, Albert’s uncle, Daisy,
Mr Foulkes (our own robber), Noel, H. O., father and
Denny. Mrs Pettigrew gave the egg. It was
a kindly housekeeper’s friendly token.
I shall not tell you about the picnic
on the river because the happiest times form but dull
reading when they are written down. I will merely
state that it was prime. Though happy, the day
was uneventful. The only thing exciting enough
to write about was in one of the locks, where there
was a snake a viper. It was asleep
in a warm sunny corner of the lock gate, and when
the gate was shut it fell off into the water.
Alice and Dora screamed hideously.
So did Daisy, but her screams were thinner.
The snake swam round and round all
the time our boat was in the lock. It swam with
four inches of itself the head end reared
up out of the water, exactly like Kaa in the Jungle
Book so we know Kipling is a true author
and no rotter. We were careful to keep our hands
well inside the boat. A snake’s eyes strike
terror into the boldest breast.
When the lock was full father killed
the viper with a boat-hook. I was sorry for it
myself. It was indeed a venomous serpent.
But it was the first we had ever seen, except at the
Zoo. And it did swim most awfully well.
Directly the snake had been killed
H. O. reached out for its corpse, and the next moment
the body of our little brother was seen wriggling
conclusively on the boat’s edge. This exciting
spectacle was not of a lasting nature. He went
right in. Father clawed him out. He is very
unlucky with water.
Being a birthday, but little was said.
H. O. was wrapped in everybody’s coats, and
did not take any cold at all.
This glorious birthday ended with
an iced cake and ginger wine, and drinking healths.
Then we played whatever we liked. There had been
rounders during the afternoon. It was a day to
be for ever marked by memory’s brightest what’s-its-name.
I should not have said anything about
the picnic but for one thing. It was the thin
edge of the wedge. It was the all-powerful lever
that moved but too many events. You see, we
were no longer strangers to
the river.
And we went there whenever we could.
Only we had to take the dogs, and to promise no bathing
without grown-ups. But paddling in back waters
was allowed. I say no more.
I have not numerated Noel’s
birthday presents because I wish to leave something
to the imagination of my young readers. (The best authors
always do this.) If you will take the large, red catalogue
of the Army and Navy Stores, and just make a list
of about fifteen of the things you would like best prices
from 2s. to 25s. you will get a very good
idea of Noel’s presents, and it will help you
to make up your mind in case you are asked just before
your next birthday what you really need.
One of Noel’s birthday presents
was a cricket ball. He cannot bowl for nuts,
and it was a first-rate ball. So some days after
the birthday Oswald offered him to exchange it for
a coconut he had won at the fair, and two pencils
(new), and a brand-new note-book. Oswald thought,
and he still thinks, that this was a fair exchange,
and so did Noel at the time, and he agreed to it,
and was quite pleased till the girls said it wasn’t
fair, and Oswald had the best of it. And then
that young beggar Noel wanted the ball back, but Oswald,
though not angry, was firm.
‘You said it was a bargain,
and you shook hands on it,’ he said, and he
said it quite kindly and calmly.
Noel said he didn’t care.
He wanted his cricket ball back. And the girls
said it was a horrid shame.
If they had not said that, Oswald
might yet have consented to let Noel have the beastly
ball, but now, of course, he was not going to.
He said
’Oh, yes, I daresay. And
then you would be wanting the coconut and things again
the next minute.’
‘No, I shouldn’t,’
Noel said. It turned out afterwards he and H.
O. had eaten the coconut, which only made it worse.
And it made them worse too which is what
the book calls poetic justice.
Dora said, ‘I don’t think
it was fair,’ and even Alice said
‘Do let him have it back, Oswald.’
I wish to be just to Alice. She
did not know then about the coconut having been secretly
wolfed up.
We were in the garden. Oswald
felt all the feelings of the hero when the opposing
forces gathered about him are opposing as hard as ever
they can. He knew he was not unfair, and he did
not like to be jawed at just because Noel had eaten
the coconut and wanted the ball back. Though
Oswald did not know then about the eating of the coconut,
but he felt the injustice in his soul all the same.
Noel said afterwards he meant to offer
Oswald something else to make up for the coconut,
but he said nothing about this at the time.
‘Give it me, I say,’ Noel said.
And Oswald said, ‘Shan’t!’
Then Noel called Oswald names, and
Oswald did not answer back but just kept smiling pleasantly,
and carelessly throwing up the ball and catching it
again with an air of studied indifference.
It was Martha’s fault that what
happened happened. She is the bull-dog, and very
stout and heavy. She had just been let loose and
she came bounding along in her clumsy way, and jumped
up on Oswald, who is beloved by all dumb animals.
(You know how sagacious they are.) Well, Martha knocked
the ball out of Oswald’s hands, and it fell on
the grass, and Noel pounced on it like a hooded falcon
on its prey. Oswald would scorn to deny that
he was not going to stand this, and the next moment
the two were rolling over on the grass, and very soon
Noel was made to bite the dust. And serve him
right. He is old enough to know his own mind.
Then Oswald walked slowly away with
the ball, and the others picked Noel up, and consoled
the beaten, but Dicky would not take either side.
And Oswald went up into his own room
and lay on his bed, and reflected gloomy reflections
about unfairness.
Presently he thought he would like
to see what the others were doing without their knowing
he cared. So he went into the linen-room and
looked out of its window, and he saw they were playing
Kings and Queens and Noel had the biggest
paper crown and the longest stick sceptre.
Oswald turned away without a word,
for it really was sickening.
Then suddenly his weary eyes fell
upon something they had not before beheld. It
was a square trap-door in the ceiling of the linen-room.
Oswald never hesitated. He crammed
the cricket ball into his pocket and climbed up the
shelves and unbolted the trap-door, and shoved it up,
and pulled himself up through it. Though above
all was dark and smelt of spiders, Oswald fearlessly
shut the trap-door down again before he struck a match.
He always carries matches. He is a boy fertile
in every subtle expedient. Then he saw he was
in the wonderful, mysterious place between the ceiling
and the roof of the house. The roof is beams
and tiles. Slits of light show through the tiles
here and there. The ceiling, on its other and
top side, is made of rough plaster and beams.
If you walk on the beams it is all right if
you walk on the plaster you go through with your feet.
Oswald found this out later, but some fine instinct
now taught the young explorer where he ought to tread
and where not. It was splendid. He was still
very angry with the others and he was glad he had
found out a secret they jolly well didn’t know.
He walked along a dark, narrow passage.
Every now and then cross-beams barred his way, and
he had to creep under them. At last a small door
loomed before him with cracks of light under and over.
He drew back the rusty bolts and opened it. It
opened straight on to the leads, a flat place between
two steep red roofs, with a parapet two feet high back
and front, so that no one could see you. It was
a place no one could have invented better than, if
they had tried, for hiding in.
Oswald spent the whole afternoon there.
He happened to have a volume of Percy’s Anecdotes
in his pocket, the one about lawyers, as well as a
few apples. While he read he fingered the cricket
ball, and presently it rolled away, and he thought
he would get it by-and-by.
When the tea-bell rang he forgot the
ball and went hurriedly down, for apples do not keep
the inside from the pangs of hunger.
Noel met him on the landing, got red
in the face, and said
’It wasn’t quite
fair about the ball, because H. O. and I had eaten
the coconut. You can have it.’
‘I don’t want your beastly
ball,’ Oswald said, ’only I hate unfairness.
However, I don’t know where it is just now.
When I find it you shall have it to bowl with as often
as you want.’
‘Then you’re not waxy?’
And Oswald said ‘No’ and
they went in to tea together. So that was all
right. There were raisin cakes for tea.
Next day we happened to want to go
down to the river quite early. I don’t
know why; this is called Fate, or Destiny. We
dropped in at the ‘Rose and Crown’ for
some ginger-beer on our way. The landlady is a
friend of ours and lets us drink it in her back parlour,
instead of in the bar, which would be improper for
girls.
We found her awfully busy, making
pies and jellies, and her two sisters were hurrying
about with great hams, and pairs of chickens, and rounds
of cold beef and lettuces, and pickled salmon and trays
of crockery and glasses.
‘It’s for the angling competition,’
she said.
We said, ‘What’s that?’
‘Why,’ she said, slicing
cucumber like beautiful machinery while she said it,
’a lot of anglers come down some particular day
and fish one particular bit of the river. And
the one that catches most fish gets the prize.
They’re fishing the pen above Stoneham Lock.
And they all come here to dinner. So I’ve
got my hands full and a trifle over.’
We said, ‘Couldn’t we help?’
But she said, ’Oh, no, thank
you. Indeed not, please. I really am so I
don’t know which way to turn. Do run along,
like dears.’
So we ran along like these timid but graceful animals.
Need I tell the intellectual reader
that we went straight off to the pen above Stoneham
Lock to see the anglers competing? Angling is
the same thing as fishing.
I am not going to try and explain
locks to you. If you’ve never seen a lock
you could never understand even if I wrote it in words
of one syllable and pages and pages long. And
if you have, you’ll understand without my telling
you. It is harder than Euclid if you don’t
know beforehand. But you might get a grown-up
person to explain it to you with books or wooden bricks.
I will tell you what a pen is because
that is easy. It is the bit of river between
one lock and the next. In some rivers ‘pens’
are called ‘reaches’, but pen is the proper
word.
We went along the towing-path; it
is shady with willows, aspens, alders, elders, oaks
and other trees. On the banks are flowers yarrow,
meadow-sweet, willow herb, loosestrife, and lady’s
bed-straw. Oswald learned the names of all these
trees and plants on the day of the picnic. The
others didn’t remember them, but Oswald did.
He is a boy of what they call relenting memory.
The anglers were sitting here and
there on the shady bank among the grass and the different
flowers I have named. Some had dogs with them,
and some umbrellas, and some had only their wives and
families.
We should have liked to talk to them
and ask how they liked their lot, and what kinds of
fish there were, and whether they were nice to eat,
but we did not like to.
Denny had seen anglers before and
he knew they liked to be talked to, but though he
spoke to them quite like to equals he did not ask the
things we wanted to know. He just asked whether
they’d had any luck, and what bait they used.
And they answered him back politely.
I am glad I am not an angler.
It is an immovable amusement, and,
as often as not, no fish to speak of after all.
Daisy and Dora had stayed at home:
Dora’s foot was nearly well but they seem really
to like sitting still. I think Dora likes to have
a little girl to order about. Alice never would
stand it. When we got to Stoneham Lock Denny
said he should go home and fetch his fishing-rod.
H. O. went with him. This left four of us Oswald,
Alice, Dicky, and Noel. We went on down the towing-path.
The lock shuts up (that sounds as if it was like the
lock on a door, but it is very otherwise) between one
pen of the river and the next; the pen where the anglers
were was full right up over the roots of the grass
and flowers. But the pen below was nearly empty.
‘You can see the poor river’s bones,’
Noel said.
And so you could.
Stones and mud and dried branches,
and here and there an old kettle or a tin pail with
no bottom to it, that some bargee had chucked in.
From walking so much along the river
we knew many of the bargees. Bargees are the
captains and crews of the big barges that are pulled
up and down the river by slow horses. The horses
do not swim. They walk on the towing-path, with
a rope tied to them, and the other end to the barge.
So it gets pulled along. The bargees we knew were
a good friendly sort, and used to let us go all over
the barges when they were in a good temper. They
were not at all the sort of bullying, cowardly fiends
in human form that the young hero at Oxford fights
a crowd of, single-handed, in books.
The river does not smell nice when
its bones are showing. But we went along down,
because Oswald wanted to get some cobbler’s wax
in Falding village for a bird-net he was making.
But just above Falding Lock, where
the river is narrow and straight, we saw a sad and
gloomy sight a big barge sitting flat on
the mud because there was not water enough to float
her.
There was no one on board, but we
knew by a red flannel waistcoat that was spread out
to dry on top that the barge belonged to friends of
ours.
Then Alice said, ’They have
gone to find the man who turns on the water to fill
the pen. I daresay they won’t find him.
He’s gone to his dinner, I shouldn’t wonder.
What a lovely surprise it would be if they came back
to find their barge floating high and dry on a lot
of water! Do let’s do it. It’s
a long time since any of us did a kind action deserving
of being put in the Book of Golden Deeds.’
We had given that name to the minute-book
of that beastly ’Society of the Wouldbegoods’.
Then you could think of the book if you wanted to
without remembering the Society. I always tried
to forget both of them.
Oswald said, ’But how?
You don’t know how. And if you did
we haven’t got a crowbar.’
I cannot help telling you that locks
are opened with crowbars. You push and push till
a thing goes up and the water runs through. It
is rather like the little sliding door in the big
door of a hen-house.
‘I know where the crowbar is,’
Alice said. ’Dicky and I were down here
yesterday when you were su ’
She was going to say sulking, I know, but she remembered
manners ere too late so Oswald bears her no malice.
She went on: ’Yesterday, when you were
upstairs. And we saw the water-tender open the
lock and the weir sluices. It’s quite easy,
isn’t it, Dicky?’
‘As easy as kiss your hand,’
said Dicky; ’and what’s more, I know where
he keeps the other thing he opens the sluices with.
I votes we do.’
‘Do let’s, if we can,’
Noel said, ’and the bargees will bless the names
of their unknown benefactors. They might make
a song about us, and sing it on winter nights as they
pass round the wassail bowl in front of the cabin
fire.’
Noel wanted to very much; but I don’t
think it was altogether for generousness, but because
he wanted to see how the sluices opened. Yet
perhaps I do but wrong the boy.
We sat and looked at the barge a bit
longer, and then Oswald said, well, he didn’t
mind going back to the lock and having a look at the
crowbars. You see Oswald did not propose this;
he did not even care very much about it when Alice
suggested it.
But when we got to Stoneham Lock,
and Dicky dragged the two heavy crowbars from among
the elder bushes behind a fallen tree, and began to
pound away at the sluice of the lock, Oswald felt it
would not be manly to stand idly apart. So he
took his turn.
It was very hard work but we opened
the lock sluices, and we did not drop the crowbar
into the lock either, as I have heard of being done
by older and sillier people.
The water poured through the sluices
all green and solid, as if it had been cut with a
knife, and where it fell on the water underneath the
white foam spread like a moving counterpane. When
we had finished the lock we did the weir which
is wheels and chains and the water pours
through over the stones in a magnificent waterfall
and sweeps out all round the weir-pool.
The sight of the foaming waterfalls
was quite enough reward for our heavy labours, even
without the thought of the unspeakable gratitude that
the bargees would feel to us when they got back to
their barge and found her no longer a stick-in-the-mud,
but bounding on the free bosom of the river.
When we had opened all the sluices
we gazed awhile on the beauties of Nature, and then
went home, because we thought it would be more truly
noble and good not to wait to be thanked for our kind
and devoted action and besides, it was
nearly dinner-time and Oswald thought it was going
to rain.
On the way home we agreed not to tell
the others, because it would be like boasting of our
good acts.
‘They will know all about it,’
Noel said, ’when they hear us being blessed
by the grateful bargees, and the tale of the Unknown
Helpers is being told by every village fireside.
And then they can write it in the Golden Deed book.’
So we went home. Denny and H.
O. had thought better of it, and they were fishing
in the moat. They did not catch anything.
Oswald is very weather-wise at
least, so I have heard it said, and he had thought
there would be rain. There was. It came on
while we were at dinner a great, strong,
thundering rain, coming down in sheets the
first rain we had had since we came to the Moat House.
We went to bed as usual. No presentiment
of the coming awfulness clouded our young mirth.
I remember Dicky and Oswald had a wrestling match,
and Oswald won.
In the middle of the night Oswald
was awakened by a hand on his face. It was a
wet hand and very cold. Oswald hit out, of course,
but a voice said, in a hoarse, hollow whisper
’Don’t be a young ass!
Have you got any matches? My bed’s full
of water; it’s pouring down from the ceiling.’
Oswald’s first thoughts was
that perhaps by opening those sluices we had flooded
some secret passage which communicated with the top
of Moat House, but when he was properly awake he saw
that this could not be, on account of the river being
so low.
He had matches. He is, as I said
before, a boy full of resources. He struck one
and lit a candle, and Dicky, for it was indeed he,
gazed with Oswald at the amazing spectacle.
Our bedroom floor was all wet in patches.
Dicky’s bed stood in a pond, and from the ceiling
water was dripping in rich profusion at a dozen different
places. There was a great wet patch in the ceiling,
and that was blue, instead of white like the dry part,
and the water dripped from different parts of it.
In a moment Oswald was quite unmanned.
‘Krikey!’ he said, in
a heart-broken tone, and remained an instant plunged
in thought.
‘What on earth are we to do?’ Dicky said.
And really for a short time even Oswald
did not know. It was a blood-curdling event,
a regular facer. Albert’s uncle had gone
to London that day to stay till the next. Yet
something must be done.
The first thing was to rouse the unconscious
others from their deep sleep, because the water was
beginning to drip on to their beds, and though as
yet they knew it not, there was quite a pool on Noel’s
bed, just in the hollow behind where his knees were
doubled up, and one of H. O.’s boots was full
of water, that surged wildly out when Oswald happened
to kick it over.
We woke them a difficult
task, but we did not shrink from it.
Then we said, ’Get up, there
is a flood! Wake up, or you will be drowned in
your beds! And it’s half past two by Oswald’s
watch.’
They awoke slowly and very stupidly.
H. O. was the slowest and stupidest.
The water poured faster and faster from the ceiling.
We looked at each other and turned pale, and Noel
said
‘Hadn’t we better call Mrs Pettigrew?’
But Oswald simply couldn’t consent
to this. He could not get rid of the feeling
that this was our fault somehow for meddling with the
river, though of course the clear star of reason told
him it could not possibly be the case.
We all devoted ourselves, heart and
soul, to the work before us. We put the bath
under the worst and wettest place, and the jugs and
basins under lesser streams, and we moved the beds
away to the dry end of the room. Ours is a long
attic that runs right across the house.
But the water kept coming in worse
and worse. Our nightshirts were wet through,
so we got into our other shirts and knickerbockers,
but preserved bareness in our feet. And the floor
kept on being half an inch deep in water, however
much we mopped it up.
We emptied the basins out of the window
as fast as they filled, and we baled the bath with
a jug without pausing to complain how hard the work
was. All the same, it was more exciting than you
can think. But in Oswald’s dauntless breast
he began to see that they would have to call
Mrs Pettigrew.
A new waterfall broke out between
the fire-grate and the mantelpiece, and spread in
devastating floods. Oswald is full of ingenious
devices. I think I have said this before, but
it is quite true; and perhaps even truer this time
than it was last time I said it.
He got a board out of the box-room
next door, and rested one end in the chink between
the fireplace and the mantelpiece, and laid the other
end on the back of a chair, then we stuffed the rest
of the chink with our nightgowns, and laid a towel
along the plank, and behold, a noble stream poured
over the end of the board right into the bath we put
there ready. It was like Niagara, only not so
round in shape. The first lot of water that came
down the chimney was very dirty. The wind whistled
outside. Noel said, ’If it’s pipes
burst, and not the rain, it will be nice for the water-rates.’
Perhaps it was only natural after this for Denny to
begin with his everlasting poetry. He stopped
mopping up the water to say:
’By this the storm
grew loud apace,
The water-rats were
shrieking,
And in the howl of Heaven
each face
Grew black as they were
speaking.’
Our faces were black, and our hands
too, but we did not take any notice; we only told
him not to gas but to go on mopping. And he did.
And we all did.
But more and more water came pouring
down. You would not believe so much could come
off one roof.
When at last it was agreed that Mrs
Pettigrew must be awakened at all hazards, we went
and woke Alice to do the fatal errand.
When she came back, with Mrs Pettigrew
in a nightcap and red flannel petticoat, we held our
breath.
But Mrs Pettigrew did not even say,
’What on earth have you children been up to
now?’ as Oswald had feared.
She simply sat down on my bed and said
‘Oh, dear! oh, dear! oh, dear!’ ever so
many times.
Then Denny said, ’I once saw
holes in a cottage roof. The man told me it was
done when the water came through the thatch. He
said if the water lies all about on the top of the
ceiling, it breaks it down, but if you make holes
the water will only come through the holes and you
can put pails under the holes to catch it.’
So we made nine holes in the ceiling
with the poker, and put pails, baths and tubs under,
and now there was not so much water on the floor.
But we had to keep on working like niggers, and Mrs
Pettigrew and Alice worked the same.
About five in the morning the rain
stopped; about seven the water did not come in so
fast, and presently it only dripped slowly. Our
task was done.
This is the only time I was ever up
all night. I wish it happened oftener. We
did not go back to bed then, but dressed and went down.
We all went to sleep in the afternoon, though.
Quite without meaning to.
Oswald went up on the roof, before
breakfast, to see if he could find the hole where
the rain had come in. He did not find any hole,
but he found the cricket ball jammed in the top of
a gutter pipe which he afterwards knew ran down inside
the wall of the house and ran into the moat below.
It seems a silly dodge, but so it was.
When the men went up after breakfast
to see what had caused the flood they said there must
have been a good half-foot of water on the leads the
night before for it to have risen high enough to go
above the edge of the lead, and of course when it
got above the lead there was nothing to stop it running
down under it, and soaking through the ceiling.
The parapet and the roofs kept it from tumbling off
down the sides of the house in the natural way.
They said there must have been some obstruction in
the pipe which ran down into the house, but whatever
it was the water had washed it away, for they put
wires down, and the pipe was quite clear.
While we were being told this Oswald’s
trembling fingers felt at the wet cricket ball in
his pocket. And he knew, but he could
not tell. He heard them wondering what the obstruction
could have been, and all the time he had the obstruction
in his pocket, and never said a single word.
I do not seek to defend him.
But it really was an awful thing to have been the
cause of; and Mrs Pettigrew is but harsh and hasty.
But this, as Oswald knows too well, is no excuse for
his silent conduct.
That night at tea Albert’s uncle
was rather silent too. At last he looked upon
us with a glance full of intelligence, and said
’There was a queer thing happened
yesterday. You know there was an angling competition.
The pen was kept full on purpose. Some mischievous
busybody went and opened the sluices and let all the
water out. The anglers’ holiday was spoiled.
No, the rain wouldn’t have spoiled it anyhow,
Alice; anglers LIKEe rain. The ‘Rose and
Crown’ dinner was half of it wasted because
the anglers were so furious that a lot of them took
the next train to town. And this is the worst
of all a barge, that was on the mud in
the pen below, was lifted and jammed across the river
and the water tilted her over, and her cargo is on
the river bottom. It was coals.’
During this speech there were four
of us who knew not where to turn our agitated glances.
Some of us tried bread-and-butter, but it seemed dry
and difficult, and those who tried tea choked and spluttered
and were sorry they had not let it alone. When
the speech stopped Alice said, ’It was us.’
And with deepest feelings she and
the rest of us told all about it.
Oswald did not say much. He was
turning the obstruction round and round in his pocket,
and wishing with all his sentiments that he had owned
up like a man when Albert’s uncle asked him before
tea to tell him all about what had happened during
the night.
When they had told all, Albert’s
uncle told us four still more plainly, and exactly,
what we had done, and how much pleasure we had spoiled,
and how much of my father’s money we had wasted because
he would have to pay for the coals being got up from
the bottom of the river, if they could be, and if
not, for the price of the coals. And we saw it
all.
And when he had done Alice burst out
crying over her plate and said
’It’s no use! We
have tried to be good since we’ve been down
here.
You don’t know how we’ve
tried! And it’s all no use. I believe
we are the wickedest children in the whole world,
and I wish we were all dead!’
This was a dreadful thing to say,
and of course the rest of us were all very shocked.
But Oswald could not help looking at Albert’s
uncle to see how he would take it.
He said very gravely, ’My dear
kiddie, you ought to be sorry, and I wish you to be
sorry for what you’ve done. And you will
be punished for it.’ (We were; our pocket-money
was stopped and we were forbidden to go near the river,
besides impositions miles long.) ‘But,’
he went on, ’you mustn’t give up trying
to be good. You are extremely naughty and tiresome,
as you know very well.’
Alice, Dicky, and Noel began to cry at about this
time.
‘But you are not the wickedest children in the
world by any means.’
Then he stood up and straightened
his collar, and put his hands in his pockets.
‘You’re very unhappy now,’
he said, ’and you deserve to be. But I will
say one thing to you.’
Then he said a thing which Oswald
at least will never forget (though but little he deserved
it, with the obstruction in his pocket, unowned up
to all the time).
He said, ’I have known you all
for four years and you know as well as
I do how many scrapes I’ve seen you in and out
of but I’ve never known one of you
tell a lie, and I’ve never known one of you do
a mean or dishonourable action. And when you
have done wrong you are always sorry. Now this
is something to stand firm on. You’ll learn
to be good in the other ways some day.’
He took his hands out of his pockets,
and his face looked different, so that three of the
four guilty creatures knew he was no longer adamant,
and they threw themselves into his arms. Dora,
Denny, Daisy, and H. O., of course, were not in it,
and I think they thanked their stars.
Oswald did not embrace Albert’s
uncle. He stood there and made up his mind he
would go for a soldier. He gave the wet ball one
last squeeze, and took his hand out of his pocket,
and said a few words before going to enlist.
He said
’The others may deserve what
you say. I hope they do, I’m sure.
But I don’t, because it was my rotten cricket
ball that stopped up the pipe and caused the midnight
flood in our bedroom. And I knew it quite early
this morning. And I didn’t own up.’
Oswald stood there covered with shame,
and he could feel the hateful cricket ball heavy and
cold against the top of his leg, through the pocket.
Albert’s uncle said and
his voice made Oswald hot all over, but not with shame he
said
I shall not tell you what he said.
It is no one’s business but Oswald’s;
only I will own it made Oswald not quite so anxious
to run away for a soldier as he had been before.
That owning up was the hardest thing
I ever did. They did put that in the Book of
Golden Deeds, though it was not a kind or generous
act, and did no good to anyone or anything except
Oswald’s own inside feelings. I must say
I think they might have let it alone. Oswald would
rather forget it. Especially as Dicky wrote it
in and put this:
’Oswald acted a lie, which,
he knows, is as bad as telling one. But he owned
up when he needn’t have, and this condones his
sin. We think he was a thorough brick to do it.’
Alice scratched this out afterwards
and wrote the record of the incident in more flattering
terms. But Dicky had used Father’s ink,
and she used Mrs Pettigrew’s, so anyone can
read his underneath the scratching outs.
The others were awfully friendly to
Oswald, to show they agreed with Albert’s uncle
in thinking I deserved as much share as anyone in any
praise there might be going.
It was Dora who said it all came from
my quarrelling with Noel about that rotten cricket
ball; but Alice, gently yet firmly, made her shut
up.
I let Noel have the ball. It
had been thoroughly soaked, but it dried all right.
But it could never be the same to me after what it
had done and what I had done.
I hope you will try to agree with
Albert’s uncle and not think foul scorn of Oswald
because of this story. Perhaps you have done things
nearly as bad yourself sometimes. If you have,
you will know how ’owning up’ soothes
the savage breast and alleviates the gnawings of remorse.
If you have never done naughty acts
I expect it is only because you never had the sense
to think of anything.