Why most important of
all.
Politeness to parents.
Politeness between brothers and sisters.
Politeness to servants. Illustrated
by story.
Treatment of company: -
Grown-up company, callers
and
visitors, young company.
MANNERS AT HOME.
OUR manners at home are of more importance
than our manners anywhere else, for several reasons:
we spend more time at home than elsewhere; our own
family have stronger claims upon us than strangers;
they love us best and do most for us, and they are
entitled not only to our love but to every courtesy
and attention from us. It is a sad thing to see
a boy or girl polite and kind away from home and to
strangers only, while at home he is rude, selfish,
and heedless of every law of good behavior. If
we are always polite in our own homes, we shall be
sure to be polite in other people’s homes.
If we do not forget to say “Good morning”
and “Good evening” to each member of our
family, we shall not forget to say them to others.
If a child has fruit or candy, he
ought not to sit down by himself to eat it, without
offering some to his companions.
In olden times it was quite common
for a young man in writing to his father to address
him as “Honored Sir.” While these
formal modes of speech may be out of place in our
time, we should so keep the commandment to honor our
parents that its spirit shall be seen in our every-day
conduct.
Children should in all things make
parents first and themselves last. A boy ought
to show his mother every attention that he would to
any lady. He should remove his hat when coming
to speak to her, let her pass through a door before
him, pick up any article she may drop, give her the
inside of the walk, help her into a carriage, show
her into the pew at church, and wait upon her everywhere.
He has similar duties to his sisters; but girls cannot
expect politeness from, unless they give it to, their
brothers.
We should say “Please”
when asking a favor from our own family. Children
should say “Please” and “Thank you”
to servants, and should never laugh at their mistakes
or hurt their feelings.
Here is an illustration of two ways
of treating a mistake. A servant-girl who had
been but a little while in this country had never
seen any radishes. When the dinner was sent home
from market one day, a bunch of radishes came with
the other vegetables. She supposed they were
to be cooked like the rest, so she carefully cut off
the tops and boiled them, then dished them up on a
small white platter, and placed them on the table
with a satisfied look. A boy in the family burst
into a loud laugh and exclaimed, “I guess you
never saw any radishes before, Mary; you’ve
spoilt them.” It was necessary then to explain
the mistake, which had better been done quietly after
dinner; and the poor girl retired in confusion to
shed tears of mortification over her ignorance.
After dinner this boy’s little sister said to
a visitor, “The radishes did look so funny and
small on the dish that I thought I should laugh, but
I knew Mary would feel bad if I did, so I looked at
my plate and tried to think of something else.”
It is easy to decide which of these
children illustrated politeness to servants.
If our parents are away when visitors
come, or too busy to see them at once, it is our place
to show them in politely, take a gentleman’s
hat, or a lady’s wrappings if she wishes to
remove them, offer a comfortable chair, show them
anything that we think will interest them, and entertain
them as well as we can until older people are at liberty.
When they are busy with company we should not trouble
them with any request that can wait.
If friends of our parents are visiting
them, we should do all we can to make the visit pleasant,
and should help our mothers even more than usual,
that they may have more time for the visitors.
If we can take care of younger brothers or sisters,
it will often be a great relief to them and the company
besides.
A lady once went to visit a friend
whom she had not seen for years. There was much
to talk about, and both felt that the afternoon would
be all too short. Think how surprised and pleased
the visitor was when her friend’s little daughter,
instead of staying in the room and teasing her mother
with all manner of questions, as children often do
in such cases, took her baby brother upstairs and
amused him until tea-time, so that her mother might
have a quiet afternoon with her friend. You may
be sure the lady will never forget that little girl’s
thoughtful politeness.
We should not enter visitors’
rooms without knocking, or sit down without being
invited; neither should we take up anything belonging
to them, or ask questions about it. We should
try not to be tiresome or disagreeable.
When young people come to visit us
we should remember that their entertainment is our
affair. We should treat them precisely as we would
want to be treated at their houses. It is rude
to criticise their dress or anything belonging to
them, or to ask inquisitive questions about their
homes. We should talk about the things they are
interested in, play the games they like, show them
our toys and books, and have regard to their preferences
in every occupation and amusement.
Home ought to be the happiest place
in the world, and the daily practice of genuine politeness
toward each other will do much to make it so.
Every little seed of courtesy, kindness, and consideration
for others sown in the home circle will spring up
and bear many more after its own kind, which shall
be scattered, like the seeds in nature, by winds and
waters, and shall be a blessing to the world wherever
they may fall.