It is a long path which stretches
from forty-five to seventy. A path easy enough
to make, for each day’s journey through life
is a part of it, but very difficult to retrace.
When we turn at that advanced mile-stone and look
back, things seem misty. For there is many a twist
and angle in the highway of a life, and often the things
which we would forget stand out the clearest.
But I would not drive from my brain this quiet afternoon
the visions which enfold it, the blessed
recollections of over a score of years ago. For
the sweet voice which speaks in my ear as I write
I have never ceased to hear; the face which the mirror
of my mind ever reflects before my eyes I have looked
upon with never-tiring eagerness, and the tender hand
which I can imagine betimes creeping into my own,
is the chiefest blessing of a life nearly spent.
There is no haunting memory of past
misdeeds to shadow the quiet rest of my last days.
As I bid my mind go back over the path which my feet
have trod, no ghost uprises to confront it; no voice
cries out for retribution or justice; not even does
a dumb animal whine at a blow inflicted, nor a worm
which my foot has wantonly pressed, appear. I
would show forth no self-praise in this, but rather
a devout thankfulness unto the Creator who made me
as I am, with a heart of mercy for all living things,
and a reverent love for all His wonderful works.
The beauty of tree, and flowering plant, and lowly
creeper abides with me as an everlasting joy, and
the song of the humblest singer the forest shelters
finds a response in my heart. Without my window
now, as I sit down to make a history of part of my
life, a brown-coated English sparrow is chattering
in a strange jargon to his mate on the limb of an
Early Harvest apple tree, and I pause a moment to listen
to his shrill little voice, and to watch the black
patch under his throat puff up and down.
It is the fall of the year, and the
afternoon is gray. At times an arrow of sunlight
breaks through the shields of clouds, and kisses the
brown earth with a quivering spot of light. Across
the sloping, unkept lawn, about midway between the
house and the whitewashed gate leading from the yard,
a rabbit hops, aimlessly, his back humped up, and his
white tail showing plainly amid his sombre surroundings.
I can see the muscles about his nostrils twitching,
as he stops now and again to nibble at a withered
tuft of grass. A lonely jay flits from one tree
to another; a cardinal speeds by my window, a line
of color across a dark background; and one by one
the dry leaves drop noiselessly down, making thicker
the soft covering which Nature is spreading over the
breast of Mother Earth.
It may be that I shall not see the
resurrection of another spring. Each winter that
has passed for the last few years has grown a little
harder for me, and my breathing becomes difficult
in the damp, cold weather. Perhaps my eyes shall
not again behold the glorious flood of light and color
which follows the footsteps of spring; perhaps when
the earth is wrapped once more in its mantle of leaves
they shall lie over my breast as well. For man’s
years upon this earth are measured in Holy Writ as
threescore and ten, and come December fourth next,
I shall have lived my allotted time. My ways
have not all been ways of pleasantness, nor all my
paths peace. But I am glad to have lived; to have
known the hopes of youth and the trials of manhood.
To have felt within my soul that emotion which rules
the earth and the universes, and which is Heaven’s
undefiled gift to Man. From books I have gained
knowledge; from the lessons of life I have learned
wisdom; from love I have found the way which leads
to life eternal.
Old age is treacherous, and it comes
to me now that maybe I have delayed my work too long.
For the mind of age does not move with the nimbleness
of a young colt, but rather with the labored efforts
of a beast of burden whose limbs are stiff from a
life of toil. But this I know, that there is
a period in my existence which the years cannot dim.
I have lived it over again and again, winter and summer,
summer and winter, here in my quiet country home among
the hills. There has been nothing to my life
but that; first, the living of it, and then the memory
of it.
It is my love story.