Bertram made up his mind at once that,
for the present, at least, he would tell no one what
the surgeon had said to him. He had placed himself
under the man’s care, and there was nothing to
do but to take the prescribed treatment and await
results as patiently as he could. Meanwhile there
was no need to worry Billy, or William, or anybody
else with the matter.
Billy was so busy with her holiday
plans that she was only vaguely aware of what seemed
to be an increase of restlessness on the part of her
husband during those days just before Christmas.
“Poor dear, is the arm feeling
horrid to-day?” she asked one morning, when
the gloom on her husband’s face was deeper than
usual.
Bertram frowned and did not answer directly.
“Lots of good I am these days!”
he exclaimed, his moody eyes on the armful of many-shaped,
many-sized packages she carried. “What are
those for-the tree?”
“Yes; and it’s going to
be so pretty, Bertram,” exulted Billy. “And,
do you know, Baby positively acts as if he suspected
things little as he is,” she went
on eagerly. “He’s as nervous as a
witch. I can’t keep him still a minute!”
“How about his mother?”
hinted Bertram, with a faint smile.
Billy laughed.
“Well, I’m afraid she
isn’t exactly calm herself,” she confessed,
as she hurried out of the room with her parcels.
Bertram looked after her longingly, despondently.
“I wonder what she’d say
if she knew,” he muttered. “But
she sha’n’t know till she just
has to,” he vowed suddenly, under his breath,
striding into the hall for his hat and coat.
Never had the Strata known such a
Christmas as this was planned to be. Cyril, Marie,
and the twins were to be there, also Kate, her husband
and three children, Paul, Egbert, and little Kate,
from the West. On Christmas Day there was to
be a big family dinner, with Aunt Hannah down from
the Annex. Then, in concession to the extreme
youth of the young host and his twin cousins, there
was to be an afternoon tree. The shades were
to be drawn and the candles lighted, however, so that
there might be no loss of effect. In the evening
the tree was to be once more loaded with fascinating
packages and candy-bags, and this time the Greggorys,
Tommy Dunn, and all the rest from the Annex were to
have the fun all over again.
From garret to basement the Strata
was aflame with holly, and aglitter with tinsel.
Nowhere did there seem to be a spot that did not have
its bit of tissue paper or its trail of red ribbon.
And everything holly, ribbon, tissue, and
tinsel led to the mysteriously closed doors
of the great front drawing-room, past which none but
Billy and her accredited messengers might venture.
No wonder, indeed, that even Baby scented excitement,
and that Baby’s mother was not exactly calm.
No wonder, too, that Bertram, with his helpless right
arm, and his heavy heart, felt peculiarly forlorn
and “out of it.” No wonder, also,
that he took himself literally out of it with growing
frequency.
Mr. and Mrs. Hartwell and little Kate
were to stay at the Strata. The boys, Paul and
Egbert, were to go to Cyril’s. Promptly
at the appointed time, two days before Christmas,
they arrived. And from that hour until two days
after Christmas, when the last bit of holly, ribbon,
tissue, and tinsel disappeared from the floor, Billy
moved in a whirl of anxious responsibility that was
yet filled with fun, frolic, and laughter.
It was a great success, the whole
affair. Everybody seemed pleased and happy that
is, everybody but Bertram; and he very plainly tried
to seem pleased and happy. Even Cyril unbent
to the extent of not appearing to mind the noise one
bit; and Sister Kate (Bertram said) found only the
extraordinarily small number of four details to change
in the arrangements. Baby obligingly let his
teeth-getting go, for the occasion, and he and the
twins, Franz and Felix, were the admiration and delight
of all. Little Kate, to be sure, was a trifle
disconcerting once or twice, but everybody was too
absorbed to pay much attention to her. Billy
did, however, remember her opening remarks.
“Well, little Kate, do you remember
me?” Billy had greeted her pleasantly.
“Oh, yes,” little Kate
had answered, with a winning smile. “You’re
my Aunt Billy what married my Uncle Bertram instead
of Uncle William as you said you would first.”
Everybody laughed, and Billy colored,
of course; but little Kate went on eagerly:
“And I’ve been wanting
just awfully to see you,” she announced.
“Have you? I’m glad,
I’m sure. I feel highly flattered,”
smiled Billy.
“Well, I have. You see,
I wanted to ask you something. Have you ever
wished that you had married Uncle William instead
of Uncle Bertram, or that you’d tried for Uncle
Cyril before Aunty Marie got him?”
“Kate!” gasped her horrified
mother. “I told you You see,”
she broke off, turning to Billy despairingly.
“She’s been pestering me with questions
like that ever since she knew she was coming.
She never has forgotten the way you changed from one
uncle to the other. You may remember; it made
a great impression on her at the time.”
“Yes, I I remember,”
stammered Billy, trying to laugh off her embarrassment.
“But you haven’t told
me yet whether you did wish you’d married Uncle
William, or Uncle Cyril,” interposed little Kate,
persistently.
“No, no, of course not!”
exclaimed Billy, with a vivid blush, casting her eyes
about for a door of escape, and rejoicing greatly when
she spied Delia with the baby coming toward them.
“There, look, my dear, here’s your new
cousin, little Bertram!” she exclaimed.
“Don’t you want to see him?”
Little Kate turned dutifully.
“Yes’m, Aunt Billy, but
I’d rather see the twins. Mother says they’re
real pretty and cunning.”
“Er y-yes, they are,”
murmured Billy, on whom the emphasis of the “they’re”
had not been lost.
Naturally, as may be supposed, therefore,
Billy had not forgotten little Kate’s opening
remarks.
Immediately after Christmas Mr. Hartwell
and the boys went back to their Western home, leaving
Mrs. Hartwell and her daughter to make a round of
visits to friends in the East. For almost a week
after Christmas they remained at the Strata; and it
was on the last day of their stay that little Kate
asked the question that proved so momentous in results.
Billy, almost unconsciously, had avoided
tete-a-têtes with her small guest. But to-day
they were alone together.
“Aunt Billy,” began the
little girl, after a meditative gaze into the other’s
face, “you are married to Uncle Bertram,
aren’t you?”
“I certainly am, my dear,”
smiled Billy, trying to speak unconcernedly.
“Well, then, what makes you forget it?”
“What makes me forget Why,
child, what a question! What do you mean?
I don’t forget it!” exclaimed Billy, indignantly.
“Then what did mother
mean? I heard her tell Uncle William myself she
didn’t know I heard, though that she
did wish you’d remember you were Uncle Bertram’s
wife as well as Cousin Bertram’s mother.”
Billy flushed scarlet, then grew very
white. At that moment Mrs. Hartwell came into
the room. Little Kate turned triumphantly.
“There, she hasn’t forgotten,
and I knew she hadn’t, mother! I asked her
just now, and she said she hadn’t.”
“Hadn’t what?” questioned
Mrs. Hartwell, looking a little apprehensively at
her sister-in-law’s white face and angry eyes.
“Hadn’t forgotten that she was Uncle Bertram’s
wife.”
“Kate,” interposed Billy,
steadily meeting her sister-in-law’s gaze, “will
you be good enough to tell me what this child is talking
about?”
Mrs. Hartwell sighed, and gave an impatient gesture.
“Kate, I’ve a mind to
take you home on the next train,” she said to
her daughter. “Run away, now, down-stairs.
Your Aunt Billy and I want to talk. Come, come,
hurry! I mean what I say,” she added warningly,
as she saw unmistakable signs of rebellion on the
small young face.
“I wish,” pouted little
Kate, rising reluctantly, and moving toward the door,
“that you didn’t always send me away just
when I wanted most to stay!”
“Well, Kate?” prompted
Billy, as the door closed behind the little girl.
“Yes, I suppose I’ll have
to say it now, as long as that child has put her finger
in the pie. But I hadn’t intended to speak,
no matter what I saw. I promised myself I wouldn’t,
before I came. I know, of course, how Bertram
and Cyril, and William, too, say that I’m always
interfering in affairs that don’t concern me though,
for that matter, if my own brother’s affairs
don’t concern me, I don’t know whose should!
“But, as I said, I wasn’t
going to speak this time, no matter what I saw.
And I haven’t except to William, and
Cyril, and Aunt Hannah; but I suppose somewhere little
Kate got hold of it. It’s simply this, Billy.
It seems to me it’s high time you began to realize
that you’re Bertram’s wife as well as
the baby’s mother.”
“That, I am I don’t
think I quite understand,” said Billy, unsteadily.
“No, I suppose you don’t,”
sighed Kate, “though where your eyes are, I
don’t see or, rather, I do see:
they’re on the baby, always. It’s
all very well and lovely, Billy, to be a devoted mother,
and you certainly are that. I’ll say that
much for you, and I’ll admit I never thought
you would be. But can’t you see
what you’re doing to Bertram?”
“Doing to Bertram! by
being a devoted mother to his son!”
“Yes, doing to Bertram.
Can’t you see what a change there is in the
boy? He doesn’t act like himself at all.
He’s restless and gloomy and entirely out of
sorts.”
“Yes, I know; but that’s
his arm,” pleaded Billy. “Poor boy he’s
so tired of it!”
Kate shook her head decisively.
“It’s more than his arm,
Billy. You’d see it yourself if you weren’t
blinded by your absorption in that baby. Where
is Bertram every evening? Where is he daytimes?
Do you realize that he’s been at home scarcely
one evening since I came? And as for the days he’s
almost never here.”
“But, Kate, he can’t paint
now, you know, so of course he doesn’t need
to stay so closely at home,” defended Billy.
“He goes out to find distraction from himself.”
“Yes, ‘distraction,’
indeed,” sniffed Kate. “And where
do you suppose he finds it? Do you know
where he finds it? I tell you, Billy, Bertram
Henshaw is not the sort of man that should find too
much ‘distraction’ outside his home.
His tastes and his temperament are altogether too
Bohemian, and ”
Billy interrupted with a peremptorily upraised hand.
“Please remember, Kate, you
are speaking of my husband to his wife; and his wife
has perfect confidence in him, and is just a little
particular as to what you say.”
“Yes; well, I’m speaking
of my brother, too, whom I know very well,”
shrugged Kate. “All is, you may remember
sometime that I warned you that’s
all. This trusting business is all very pretty;
but I think ’twould be a lot prettier, and a
vast deal more sensible, if you’d give him a
little attention as well as trust, and see if you can’t
keep him at home a bit more. At least you’ll
know whom he’s with, then. Cyril says he
saw him last week with Bob Seaver.”
“With Bob Seaver?”
faltered Billy, changing color.
“Yes. I see you remember
him,” smiled Kate, not quite agreeably.
“Perhaps now you’ll take some stock in
what I’ve said, and remember it.”
“I’ll remember it, certainly,”
returned Billy, a little proudly. “You’ve
said a good many things to me, in the past, Mrs. Hartwell,
and I’ve remembered them all every
one.”
It was Kate’s turn to flush, and she did it.
“Yes, I know. And I presume
very likely sometimes there hasn’t been
much foundation for what I’ve said. I think
this time, however, you’ll find there is,”
she finished, with an air of hurt dignity.
Billy made no reply, perhaps because
Delia, at that moment, brought in the baby.
Mrs. Hartwell and little Kate left
the Strata the next morning. Until then Billy
contrived to keep, before them, a countenance serene,
and a manner free from unrest. Even when, after
dinner that evening, Bertram put on his hat and coat
and went out, Billy refused to meet her sister-in-law’s
meaning gaze. But in the morning, after they had
left the house, Billy did not attempt to deceive herself.
Determinedly, then, she set herself to going over
in her mind the past months since the baby came; and
she was appalled at what she found. Ever in her
ears, too, was that feared name, “Bob Seaver”;
and ever before her eyes was that night years ago
when, as an eighteen-year-old girl, she had followed
Bertram and Bob Seaver into a glittering cafe at eleven
o’clock at night, because Bertram had been drinking
and was not himself. She remembered Bertram’s
face when he had seen her, and what he had said when
she begged him to come home. She remembered,
too, what the family had said afterward. But
she remembered, also, that years later Bertram had
told her what that escapade of hers had really done
for him, and that he believed he had actually loved
her from that moment. After that night, at all
events, he had had little to do with Bob Seaver.
And now Seaver was back again, it
seemed and with Bertram. They had
been seen together. But if they had, what could
she do? Surely she could hardly now follow them
into a public cafe and demand that Seaver let her
husband come home! But she could keep him at home,
perhaps. (Billy quite brightened at this thought.)
Kate had said that she was so absorbed in Baby that
her husband received no attention at all. Billy
did not believe this was true; but if it were true,
she could at least rectify that mistake. If it
were attention that he wanted he should
want no more. Poor Bertram! No wonder that
he had sought distraction outside! When one had
a horrid broken arm that would not let one do anything,
what else could one do?
Just here Billy suddenly remembered
the book, “A Talk to Young Wives.”
If she recollected rightly, there was a chapter that
covered the very claim Kate had been making.
Billy had not thought of the book for months, but
she went at once to get it now. There might be,
after all, something in it that would help her.
“The Coming of the First Baby.”
Billy found the chapter without difficulty and settled
herself to read, her countenance alight with interest.
In a surprisingly short time, however, a new expression
came to her face; and at last a little gasp of dismay
fell from her lips. She looked up then, with
a startled gaze.
Had her walls possessed eyes
and ears all these past months, only to give instructions
to an unseen hand that it might write what the eyes
and ears had learned? For it was such sentences
as these that the conscience-smitten Billy read:
“Maternity is apt to work a
miracle in a woman’s life, but sometimes it
spells disaster so far as domestic bliss is concerned.
The young mother, wrapped up in the delights and duties
of motherhood, utterly forgets that she has a husband.
She lives and moves and has her being in the nursery.
She thinks baby, talks baby, knows only baby.
She refuses to dress up, because it is easier to take
care of baby in a frowzy wrapper. She will not
go out with her husband for fear something might happen
to the baby. She gives up her music because baby
won’t let her practice. In vain her husband
tries to interest her in his own affairs. She
has neither eyes nor ears for him, only for baby.
“Now no man enjoys having his
nose put out of joint, even by his own child.
He loves his child devotedly, and is proud of him,
of course; but that does not keep him from wanting
the society of his wife occasionally, nor from longing
for her old-time love and sympathetic interest.
It is an admirable thing, certainly, for a woman to
be a devoted mother; but maternal affection can be
carried too far. Husbands have some rights as
well as offspring; and the wife who neglects her husband
for her babies does so at her peril. Home, with
the wife eternally in the nursery, is apt to be a
dull and lonely thing to the average husband, so he
starts out to find amusement for himself and
he finds it. Then is the time when the new little
life that is so precious, and that should have bound
the two more closely together, becomes the wedge that
drives them apart.”
Billy did not read any more.
With a little sobbing cry she flung the book back
into her desk, and began to pull off her wrapper.
Her fingers shook. Already she saw herself a
Monster, a Wicked Destroyer of Domestic Bliss with
her thoughtless absorption in Baby, until he had become
that Awful Thing a Wedge. And
Bertram poor Bertram, with his broken arm!
She had not played to him, nor sung to him, nor gone
out with him. And when had they had one of their
good long talks about Bertram’s work and plans?
But it should all be changed now.
She would play, and sing, and go out with him.
She would dress up, too. He should see no more
wrappers. She would ask about his work, and seem
interested. She was interested. She
remembered now, that just before he was hurt, he had
told her of a new portrait, and of a new “Face
of a Girl” that he had planned to do. Lately
he had said nothing about these. He had seemed
discouraged and no wonder, with his broken
arm! But she would change all that. He should
see! And forthwith Billy hurried to her closet
to pick out her prettiest house frock.
Long before dinner Billy was ready,
waiting in the drawing-room. She had on a pretty
little blue silk gown that she knew Bertram liked,
and she watched very anxiously for Bertram to come
up the steps. She remembered now, with a pang,
that he had long since given up his peculiar ring;
but she meant to meet him at the door just the same.
Bertram, however, did not come.
At a quarter before six he telephoned that he had
met some friends, and would dine at the club.
“My, my, how pretty we are!”
exclaimed Uncle William, when they went down to dinner
together. “New frock?”
“Why, no, Uncle William,”
laughed Billy, a little tremulously. “You’ve
seen it dozens of times!”
“Have I?” murmured the
man. “I don’t seem to remember it.
Too bad Bertram isn’t here to see you.
Somehow, you look unusually pretty to-night.”
And Billy’s heart ached anew.
Billy spent the evening practicing softly,
to be sure, so as not to wake Baby but
practicing.
As the days passed Billy discovered
that it was much easier to say she would “change
things” than it was really to change them.
She changed herself, it is true her clothes,
her habits, her words, and her thoughts; but it was
more difficult to change Bertram. In the first
place, he was there so little. She was dismayed
when she saw how very little, indeed, he was at home and
she did not like to ask him outright to stay.
That was not in accordance with her plans. Besides,
the “Talk to Young Wives” said that indirect
influence was much to be preferred, always, to direct
persuasion which last, indeed, usually failed
to produce results.
So Billy “dressed up,”
and practiced, and talked (of anything but the baby),
and even hinted shamelessly once or twice that she
would like to go to the theater; but all to little
avail. True, Bertram brightened up, for a minute,
when he came home and found her in a new or a favorite
dress, and he told her how pretty she looked.
He appeared to like to have her play to him, too,
even declaring once or twice that it was quite like
old times, yes, it was. But he never noticed her
hints about the theater, and he did not seem to like
to talk about his work, even a little bit.
Billy laid this last fact to his injured
arm. She decided that he had become blue and
discouraged, and that he needed cheering up, especially
about his work; so she determinedly and systematically
set herself to doing it.
She talked of the fine work he had
done, and of the still finer work he would yet do,
when his arm was well. She told him how proud
she was of him, and she let him see how dear his Art
was to her, and how badly she would feel if she thought
he had really lost all his interest in his work and
would never paint again. She questioned him about
the new portrait he was to begin as soon as his arm
would let him; and she tried to arouse his enthusiasm
in the picture he had planned to show in the March
Exhibition of the Bohemian Ten, telling him that she
was sure his arm would allow him to complete at least
one canvas to hang.
In none of this, however, did Bertram
appear in the least interested. The one thing,
indeed, which he seemed not to want to talk about,
was his work; and he responded to her overtures on
the subject with only moody silence, or else with
almost irritable monosyllables; all of which not only
grieved but surprised Billy very much. For, according
to the “Talk to Young Wives,” she was
doing exactly what the ideal, sympathetic, interested-in-her-husband’s-work
wife should do.
When February came, bringing with
it no change for the better, Billy was thoroughly
frightened. Bertram’s arm plainly was not
improving. He was more gloomy and restless than
ever. He seemed not to want to stay at home at
all; and Billy knew now for a certainty that he was
spending more and more time with Bob Seaver and “the
boys.”
Poor Billy! Nowhere could she
look these days and see happiness. Even the adored
baby seemed, at times, almost to give an added pang.
Had he not become, according to the “Talk to
Young Wives” that awful thing, a Wedge?
The Annex, too, carried its sting; for where was the
need of an overflow house for happiness now, when
there was no happiness to overflow? Even the
little jade idol on Billy’s mantel Billy could
not bear to see these days, for its once bland smile
had become a hideous grin, demanding, “Where,
now, is your heap plenty velly good luckee?”
But, before Bertram, Billy still carried
a bravely smiling face, and to him still she talked
earnestly and enthusiastically of his work which
last, as it happened, was the worst course she could
have pursued; for the one thing poor Bertram wished
to forget, just now, was his work.