“Have you seen Mrs. Harbert lately, Carol?”
“Yes, she’s better, father. I was
there a few minutes yesterday.”
“Yesterday? You were there Tuesday, weren’t
you?”
Carol looked uncomfortable. “Why, yes,
I was, just for a second.”
“She tells me you’ve been
running in nearly every day since she took sick.”
Carol bent sharply inquiring eyes
upon her father. “What else did she tell
you?”
“She said you were an angel.”
“Y-yes, she seems somehow to think
I do it for kindness.”
“And don’t you?”
“Why, no, father, of course
I don’t. It’s only two blocks out
of my way and it’s such fun to pop in on sick
folks and show them how disgustingly strong and well
I am.”
“Where did you get the money for that basket
of fruit?”
“I borrowed it from Aunt Grace.”
Carol’s face was crimson with mortification.
“But it’ll be a sweet time before Mrs.
Harbert gets anything else from me. She promised
she wouldn’t tell.”
“Did any of the others know about the fruit?”
“Why not exactly.”
“But she thinks it was from the whole family.
She thanked me for it.”
“I I made her think
that,” Carol explained. “I want her
to think we’re the nicest parsonage bunch they’ve
ever had in Mount Mark. Besides, it really was
from the family. Aunt Grace loaned me the money
and I’ll have to borrow it from you to pay her.
And Lark did my dusting so I could go on the errand,
though she did not know what it was. And I er accidentally
took one of Connie’s ribbons to tie it with.
Isn’t that a family gift?”
“Mr. Scott tells me you are
the prime mover in the Junior League now,” he
continued.
“Well, goodness knows our Junior League needs
a mover of some sort.”
“And Mrs. Davies says you are
a whole Mercy and Help Department all by yourself.”
“What I can’t understand,”
said Carol mournfully, “is why folks don’t
keep their mouths shut. I know that sounds very
inelegant, but it expresses my idea perfectly.
Can’t I have a good time in my own way without
the whole church pedaling me from door to door?”
The twinkle in her father’s
eyes deepened. “What do you call it, Carol,
’sowing seeds of kindness’?”
“I should say not,” came
the emphatic retort. “I call it sowing seeds
of fun. It’s a circus to go around and
gloat over folks when they are sick or sorry, or
“But they tell me you don’t
gloat. Mrs. Marling says you cried with Jeanie
half a day when her dog died.”
“Oh, that’s my way of
gloating,” said Carol, nothing daunted, but
plainly glad to get away without further interrogation.
It was a strange thing that of all
the parsonage girls, Carol, light-hearted, whimsical,
mischievous Carol, was the one most dear to the hearts
of her father’s people. Not the gentle Prudence,
nor charming Fairy, not clever Lark nor conscientious
Connie, could rival the “naughty twin”
in Mount Mark’s affections. And in spite
of her odd curt speeches, and her openly-vaunted vanity,
Mount Mark insisted she was “good.”
Certainly she was willing! “Get Carol Starr, she’ll
do it,” was the commonest phrase in Mount Mark’s
vocabulary. Whatever was wanted, whatever the
sacrifice involved, Carol stood ready to fill the bill.
Not for kindness, oh, dear no, Carol
staunchly disclaimed any such niceness as that.
She did it for fun, pure and simple. She said
she liked to show off. She insisted that she
liked to feel that she was the pivot on which little
old Mount Mark turned. But this was only when
she was found out. As far as she could she kept
her little “seeds of fun” carefully up
her sleeve, and it was only when the indiscreet adoration
of her friends brought the budding plants to light,
that she laughingly declared “it was a circus
to go and gloat over folks.”
Once in the early dusk of a summer
evening, she discovered old Ben Peters, half intoxicated,
slumbering noisily on a pile of sacks in a corner
of the parsonage barn. Carol was sorry, but not
at all frightened. The poor, kindly, weak, old
man was as familiar to her as any figure in Mount
Mark. He was always in a more or less helpless
state of intoxication, but also he was always harmless,
kind-hearted and generous. She prodded him vigorously
with the handle of the pitch-fork until he was aroused
to consciousness, and then guided him into the woodshed
with the buggy whip. When he was seated on a chunk
of wood she faced him sternly.
“Well, you are a dandy,”
she said. “Going into a parsonage barn,
of all places in the world, to sleep off an odor like
yours! Why didn’t you go down to Fred Greer’s
harness shop, that’s where you got it. We’re
such an awfully temperance town, you know! But
the parsonage! Why, if the trustees had happened
into the barn and caught a whiff of that smell, father’d
have lost his job. Now you just take warning from
me, and keep away from this parsonage until you can
develop a good Methodist odor. Oh, don’t
cry about it! Your very tears smell rummy.
Just you hang on to that chunk of wood, and I’ll
bring you some coffee.”
Like a thief in the night she sneaked
into the house, and presently returned with a huge
tin of coffee, steaming hot. He drank it eagerly,
but kept a wary eye on the haughty twin, who stood
above him with the whip in her hand.
“That’s better. Now,
sit down and listen to me. If you would come to
the parsonage, you have to take your medicine.
Silver and gold have we none, but such as we have
we give to you. And religion’s all we’ve
got. You’re here, and I’m here.
We haven’t any choir or any Bible, but parsonage
folks have to be adaptable. Now then, Ben Peters,
you’ve got to get converted.”
The poor doddering old fellow, sobered
by this awful announcement, looked helplessly at the
window. It was too small. And slender active
Carol, with the buggy whip, stood between him and the
door.
“No, you can’t escape.
You’re done for this time, it’s
the straight and narrow from this on. Now listen, it’s
really very simple. And you need it pretty badly,
Ben. Of course you don’t realize it when
you’re drunk, you can’t see how terribly
disgusting you are, but honestly, Ben, a pig is a
ray of sunshine compared to a drunk man. You’re
a blot on the landscape. You’re a you’re
a ” She fished vainly for words, longing
for Lark’s literary flow of language.
“I’m not drunk,” he stammered.
“No, you’re not, thanks
to the buggy whip and that strong coffee, but you’re
no beauty even yet. Well now, to come down to
religion again. You can’t stop drinking
“I could,” he blustered feebly, “I
could if I wanted to.”
“Oh, no, you couldn’t.
You haven’t backbone enough. You couldn’t
stop to save your life. But,” Carol’s
voice lowered a little, and she grew shy, but very
earnest, “but God can stop you, because He has
enough backbone for a hundred thousand er,
jellyfishes. And you see, it’s
like this. God made the world, and put the people
in it. Now listen carefully, Ben, and I’ll
make it just as simple as possible so it can sink through
the smell and get at you. God made the world,
and put the people in it. And the people sinned,
worshiped idols and went back on God, and did
a lot of other mean things. So God was in honor
bound to punish them, for that’s the law, and
God’s the judge that can’t be bought.
He had to inflict punishment. But God and Jesus
talked it over, and they felt awfully bad about it,
for they kind of liked the people anyhow.”
She stared at the disreputable figure slouching on
the chunk of wood. “It’s very hard
to understand, very. I should think they would
despise us, some of us,” she added
significantly. “I’m sure I should.
But anyhow they didn’t. Are you getting
me?”
The bleary eyes were really fastened
intently on the girl’s bright face, and he hung
upon her words.
“Well, they decided that Jesus
should come down here and live, and be perfectly good,
so He would not deserve any punishment, and then God
would allow Him to receive the punishment anyhow, and
the rest of us could go free. That would cover
the law. See? Punishing Him when He deserved
no punishment. Then they could forgive us heathens
that didn’t deserve it. Do you get that?”
She looked at him anxiously. “It all hinges
on that, you know. I’m not a preacher myself,
but that’s the idea. So Jesus was crucified,
and then God said, ’There He is! Look on
Him, believe in Him, worship Him, and in His name you
stand O. K.’ See? That means, if we
give Him the chance, God’ll let Jesus take our
share of the punishment. So we’ve just
got to let go, and say, ’All right, here I am.
I believe it, I give up, I know I don’t amount
to a hill of beans and you can say it very
honestly but if you want me, and will call
it square, God knows I’m willing.’
And there you are.”
“Won’t I drink any more?”
“No, not if you let go hard
enough. I mean,” she caught herself up
quickly, “I mean if you let clear go and turn
the job over to God. But you’re not to
think you can keep decent by yourself, for you can’t it’s
not born in you, and something else is just
let go, and stay let go. After that, it’s
God’s job, and unless you stick in and try to
manage yourself, He’ll see you through.”
“All right, I’ll do it.”
Carol gasped. She opened her
lips a few times, and swallowed hard. She didn’t
know what to do next. Wildly she racked her brain
for the next step in this vital performance.
“I think we ought to pray,”
she said feebly.
“All right, we’ll pray.”
He rolled curiously off the stick of wood, and fell,
as if by instinct, into the attitude of prayer.
Carol gazed about her helplessly.
But true to her training, she knelt beside him.
Then came silence.
“I well, I’ll
pray,” she said with grim determination.
“Dear Father in Heaven,” she began weakly,
and then she forgot her timidity and her fear, and
realized only that this was a crisis in the life of
the drunken man.
“Oh, God, he’ll do it.
He’ll let go, and turn it over to you. He
isn’t worth anything, God, none of us are, but
You can handle him, for You’ve had worse jobs
than this, though it doesn’t seem possible.
You’ll help him, God, and love him, and show
him how, for he hasn’t the faintest idea what
to do next, and neither have I. But You brought him
into our barn to-night, and You’ll see him through.
Oh, God, for Jesus’ sake, help Ben Peters.
Amen.
“Now, what shall I do?” she wondered.
“What’s your father for?”
She looked quickly at Ben Peters. He had not
spoken, but something certainly had asked, “What’s
your father for?”
“You stay here, Ben, and pray
for yourself, and I’ll send father out.
I’m not just sure what to say next, and father’ll
finish you up. You pray for all you’re
worth.”
She was gone in a flash, through the
kitchen, through the hall, up the stairs two at a
time, and her arm thrown closely about her father’s
shoulder.
“Oh, father, I got stuck,”
she wailed. “I’m so ashamed of myself.
But you can finish him off, can’t you?
I honestly believe he’s started.”
He took her firmly by the arms and
squared her around on his lap. “One, two,
three, ready, go. Now, what?”
“Ben Peters. He was drunk
in the barn and I took him into the woodshed and gave
him some hot coffee, and some religion,
but not enough to hurt him. I told him he had
to get converted, and he said he would. So I told
him about it, but you’d better tell him again,
for I’m afraid I made quite a mess of it.
And then we prayed, and I was stuck for fair, father,
for I couldn’t think what to do next. But
I do believe it was God who said, ‘What’s
your father for?’ And so I left him praying for
himself, and you’d better hurry, or
he may get cold feet and run away. Be easy with
him, father, but don’t let him off. This
is the first chance we’ve ever had at Ben Peters,
and God’ll never forgive us if we let him slip
through our fingers.”
Carol was dumped off on to the floor
and her father was half-way down the stairs before
she caught her breath. Then she smiled. Then
she blushed.
“That was one bad job,”
she said to herself sadly. “I’m a
disgrace to the Methodist church. Thank goodness
the trustees’ll never hear of it. I’ll
bribe Ben Peters to eternal silence if I have to do
it with kisses.” Then her face grew very
soft. “Poor old man! Oh, the poor old
man!” A quick rush of tears blinded her eyes,
and her throat throbbed. “Oh, why do they, what
makes men like that? Can’t they see, can’t
they know, how awful they are, how ”
She shuddered. “I can’t see for the
life of me what makes God treat us decently at all.”
Her face brightened again. “I was a bad
job, all right, but I feel kind of pleased about it.
I hope father won’t mention it to the girls.”
And Ben Peters truly had a start,
incredible as it seemed. Yes, as Carol had warned
him, he forgot sometimes and tried to steer for himself,
and always crashed into the rocks. Then Carol,
with angry eyes and scornful voice, berated him for
trying to get hold of God’s job, and cautioned
him anew about “sticking in when it was not his
affair any more.” It took time, a long
time, and hard work, and many, many prayers went up
from Carol’s bedside, and from the library at
the head of the stairs, but there came a time when
Ben Peters let go for good and all, and turned to
Carol, standing beside the bed with sorry frightened
eyes, and said quietly:
“It’s all right, Carol.
I’ve let go. You’re a mighty nice
little girl. I’ve let go for good this
time. I’m just slipping along where He sends
me, it’s all right,” he finished
drowsily. And fell asleep.