Mr. Starr was getting ready to go
to conference, and the girls hovered about him with
anxious eyes. This was their fifth conference
since coming to Mount Mark, the time limit
for Methodist ministers was five years. The Starrs,
therefore, would be transferred, and where? Small
wonder that the girls followed him around the house
and spoke in soft voices and looked with tender eyes
at the old parsonage and the wide lawn. They
would be leaving it next week. Already the curtains
were down, and laundered, and packed. The trunks
were filled, the books were boxed. Yes, they
were leaving, but whither were they bound?
“Get your ecclesiastical dander
up, father,” Carol urged, “don’t
let them give us a church fight, or a twenty-thousand-dollar
debt on a thousand-dollar congregation.”
“We don’t care for a big
salary or a stylish congregation,” Lark added,
“but we don’t want to go back to washpans
and kerosene lamps again.”
“If you have to choose between
a bath tub, with a church quarrel, and a wash basin
with peace and harmony, we’ll take the tub and
settle the scrap!”
The conference was held in Fairfield,
and he informed the girls casually that he would be
home on the first train after the assignments were
made. He said it casually, for he did not wish
them to know how perturbed he was over the coming
change. During the conference he tried in many
and devious ways to learn the will of the authorities
regarding his future, but he found no clue. And
at home the girls were discussing the matter very
little, but thinking of nothing else. They were
determined to be pleased about it.
“It really doesn’t make
any difference,” Lark said. “We’ve
had one year in college, we can get along without
any more. Or maybe father would let us borrow
the money and stay at the dorm. And Connie’s
so far along now that she’s all right.
Any good high school will do for her. It doesn’t
make any difference at all.”
“No, we’re so nearly grown
up that one place will do just as well as another,”
agreed Carol unconcernedly.
“I’m rather anxious to
move, myself,” said Connie. “I’m
afraid some of the ladies might carry out their designs
on father. They’ve had five years of practise
now, you know.”
“Don’t be silly, Con.
Isn’t Aunt Grace here on purpose to chaperon
him and keep the ladies off? I’d hate to
go to New London, or Mediapolis, or but
after all it doesn’t make a bit of difference.”
Just the same, on Wednesday evening,
the girls sat silent, with intensely flushed faces
and painfully shining eyes, watching the clock, listening
for the footstep. They had deliberately remained
away from the station. They thought they could
face it better within the friendly walls of the parsonage.
It was all settled now, father knew where they were
going. Oh, why hadn’t he wired? It
must be terribly bad then, he evidently wanted to
break it to them gently.
Maybe it was a circuit! There
was the whistle now! Only a few minutes now.
Suppose his salary were cut down, good-by
to silk stockings and kid gloves, cheap,
but kid, just the same! Suppose the parsonage
would be old-fashioned! Suppose there wasn’t
any parsonage at all, and they would have to pay rent!
Sup Then the door slammed.
Carol and Lark picked up their darning,
and Connie bent earnestly over her magazine.
Aunt Grace covered a yawn with her slender fingers
and looked out of the window.
“Hello!”
“Why, hello, papa! Back already?”
They dropped darning and magazine and flew to welcome
him home.
“Come and sit down!” “My,
it seemed a long time!” “We had lots of
fun, father.” “Was it a nice conference?”
“Mr. James sent us two bushels of potatoes!”
“We’re going to have chicken to-morrow the
Ladies’ Aiders sent it with their farewell love.”
“Wasn’t it a dandy day?”
“Well, it’s all settled.”
“Yes, we supposed it would be.
Was the conference good? We read accounts of
it every day, and acted stuck-up when it said nice
things about you.”
“We are to
“Ju-just a minute, father,”
interrupted Connie anxiously. “We don’t
care a snap where it is, honestly we don’t.
We’re just crazy about it, wherever it is.
We’ve got it all settled. You needn’t
be afraid to tell us.”
“Afraid to tell us!” mocked
the twins indignantly. “What kind of slave-drivers
do you think we are?”
“Of course we don’t care
where we go,” explained Lark. “Haven’t
we been a parsonage bunch long enough to be tickled
to death to be sent any place?”
“Father knows we’re all
right. Go on, daddy, who’s to be our next
flock?”
“We haven’t any, we
The girls’ faces paled. “Haven’t
any? You mean
“I mean we’re to stay in Mount Mark.”
“Stay in What?”
“Mount Mark. They
“They extended the limit,” cried Connie,
springing up.
“No,” he denied, laughing. “They
made me a presiding elder, and we’re
“A presiding elder! Father! Honestly?
They
“They ought to have made you
a bishop,” cried Carol loyally. “I’ve
been expecting it all my life. That’s where
the next jump’ll land you. Presiding elder!
Now we can snub the Ladies’ Aid if we want to.”
“Do you want to?”
“No, of course not, but it’s
lots of fun to know we could if we did want to.”
“I pity the next parsonage bunch,” said
Connie sympathetically.
“Why? There’s nothing the matter
with our church!”
“Oh, no, that isn’t what
I mean. But the next minister’s family can’t
possibly come up to us, and so
The others broke her sentence with their laughter.
“Talk about me and my complexion!”
gasped Carol, wiping her eyes. “I’m
nothing to Connie and her family pride. Where
will we live now, father?”
“We’ll rent a house any house
we like and live like white folks.”
“Rent! Mercy, father, doesn’t
the conference furnish the elders with houses?
We can never afford to pay rent! Never!”
“Oh, we have a salary of twenty-five
hundred a year now,” he said, with apparent
complacence, but careful to watch closely for the effect
of this statement. It gratified him, too, much
as he had expected. The girls stood stock-still
and gazed at him, and then, with a violent struggle
for self-composure Carol asked:
“Did you get any of it in advance?
I need some new slippers.”
So the packing was finished, a suitable
house was found modern, with reasonable
rent on Maple Avenue where the oaks were
most magnificent, and the parsonage family became
just ordinary “folks,” a parsonage household
no longer.
“You must be very patient with
us if we still try to run things,” Carol said
apologetically to the president of the Ladies’
Aid. “We’ve been a parsonage bunch
all our lives, you know, and it’s got to be a
habit. But we’ll be as easy on you as we
can. We know what it would mean to leave two
ministers’ families down on you at once.”
Mr. Starr’s new position necessitated
long and frequent absences from home, and that was
a drawback to the family comradeship. But the
girls’ pride in his advancement was so colossal,
and their determination to live up to the dignity
of the eldership was so deep-seated, that affairs
ran on quite serenely in the new home.
“Aren’t we getting sensible?”
Carol frequently asked her sisters, and they agreed
enthusiastically that they certainly were.
“I don’t think we ever
were so bad as we thought we were,” Lark said.
“Even Prudence says now that we were always pretty
good. Prudence ought to think so. She got
most of our spending money for a good many years,
didn’t she?”
“Prudence didn’t get it. She gave
it to the heathen.”
“Well, she got credit for it
on the Lord’s accounts, I suppose. But she
deserved it. It was no joke collecting allowances
from us.”
One day this beautiful serenity was
broken in upon in a most unpleasant way. Carol
looked up from De Senectute and flung out her
arms in an all-relieving yawn. Then she looked
at her aunt, asleep on the couch. She looked
at Lark, who was aimlessly drawing feathers on the
skeletons of birds in her biology text. She looked
at Connie, sitting upright in her chair, a small book
close to her face, alert, absorbed, oblivious to the
world. Connie was wide awake, and Carol resented
it.
“What are you reading, Con?” she asked
reproachfully.
Connie looked up, startled, and colored
a little. “Oh, poetry,”
she stammered.
Carol was surprised. “Poetry,”
she echoed. “Poetry? What kind of poetry?
There are many poetries in this world of ours.
’Life is real, life is earnest.’
‘There was a young lady from Bangor.’
’A man and a maiden decided to wed.’
’Sunset and, evening star,’ oh,
there are lots of poetries. What’s yours?”
Her senseless dissertation had put her in good humor
again.
Connie answered evasively. “It
is by an old Oriental writer. I don’t suppose
you’ve ever read it. Khayyam is his name.”
“Some name,” said Carol
suspiciously. “What’s the poem?”
Her eyes had narrowed and darkened. By this time
Carol had firmly convinced herself that she was bringing
Connie up, a belief which afforded lively
amusement to self-conducting Connie.
“Why, it’s The Rubaiyat. It’s
“The Rubaiyat!”
Carol frowned. Lark looked up from the skeletons
with sudden interest. “The Rubaiyat?
By Khayyam? Isn’t that the old fellow who
didn’t believe in God, and Heaven, and such things you
know what I mean, the man who didn’t
believe anything, and wrote about it? Let me
see it. I’ve never read it myself, but I’ve
heard about it.” Carol turned the pages
with critical disapproving eyes. “Hum, yes,
I know about this.” She faced Connie sternly.
“I suppose you think, Connie, that since we’re
out of a parsonage we can do anything we like.
Haven’t we any standards? Haven’t
we any ideals? Are we are we well,
anyhow, what business has a minister’s daughter
reading trash like this?”
“I don’t believe it, you
know,” Connie said coolly. “I’m
only reading it. How can I know whether it’s
trash or not, unless I read it? I
“Ministers’ daughters
are supposed to keep their fingers clear of the burning
ends of matches,” said Carol neatly. “We
can’t handle them without getting scorched,
or blackened, at least. We have to steer clear
of things folks aren’t sure about. Prudence
says so.”
“Prudence,” said Connie
gravely, “is a dear sweet thing, but she’s
awfully old-fashioned, Carol; you know that.”
Carol and Lark were speechless.
They would as soon have dreamed of questioning the
catechism as Prudence’s perfection.
“She’s narrow. She’s
a darling, of course, but she isn’t up-to-date.
I want to know what folks are talking about.
I don’t believe this poem. I’m a
Christian. But I want to know what other folks
think about me and what I believe. That’s
all. Prudence is fine, but I know a good deal
more about some things than Prudence will know when
she’s a thousand years old.”
The twins still sat silent.
“Of course, some folks wouldn’t
approve of parsonage girls reading things like this.
But I approve of it. I want to know why I disagree
with this poetry, and I can’t until I know where
we disagree. It’s beautiful, Carol, really.
It’s kind of sad. It makes me want to cry.
It’s
“I’ve a big notion to
tell papa on you,” said Carol soberly and sadly.
Connie rose at once.
“What’s the matter?”
“I’m going to tell papa myself.”
Carol moved uneasily in her chair.
“Oh, let it go this time. I I
just mentioned it to relieve my feelings. I won’t
tell him yet. I’ll talk it over with you
again. I’ll have to think it over first.”
“I think I’d rather tell him,” insisted
Connie.
Carol looked worried, but she knew
Connie would do as she said. So she got up nervously
and went with her. She would have to see it through
now, of course. Connie walked silently up the
stairs, with Carol following meekly behind, and rapped
at her father’s door. Then she entered,
and Carol, in a hushed sort of way, closed the door
behind them.
“I’m reading this, father.
Any objections?” Connie faced him calmly, and
handed him the little book.
He examined it gravely, his brows
contracting, a sudden wrinkling at the corners of
his lips that might have meant laughter, or disapproval,
or anything.
“I thought a parsonage girl
should not read it,” Carol said bravely.
“I’ve never read it myself, but I’ve
heard about it, and parsonage girls ought to read
parsonage things. Prudence says so. But
“But I want to know what other
folks think about what I believe,” said Connie.
“So I’m reading it.”
“What do you think of, it?”
he asked quietly, and he looked very strangely at
his baby daughter. It was suddenly borne in on
him that this was one crisis in her growth to womanhood,
and he felt a great yearning tenderness for her, in
her innocence, in her dauntless courage, in her reaching
ahead, always ahead! It was a crisis, and he must
be very careful.
“I think it is beautiful,”
Connie said softly, and her lips drooped a little,
and a wistful pathos crept into her voice. “It
seems so sad. I keep wishing I could cry about
it. There’s nothing really sad in it, I
think it is supposed to be rather jovial, but it
seems terrible to me, even when it is the most beautiful.
Part of it I don’t understand very well.”
He held out a hand to Connie, and
she put her own in it confidently. Carol, too,
came and stood close beside him.
“Yes,” he said, “it
is beautiful, Connie, and it is very terrible.
We can’t understand it fully because we can’t
feel what he felt. It is a groping poem, a struggling
for light when one is stumbling in darkness.”
He looked thoughtfully at the girls. “He
was a marvelous man, that Khayyam, years
ahead of his people, and his time. He was big
enough to see the idiocy of the heathen ideas of God,
he was beyond them, he spurned them. But he was
not quite big enough to reach out, alone, and get
hold of our kind of a God. He was reaching out,
he was struggling, but he couldn’t quite catch
hold. It is a wonderful poem. It shows the
weakness, the helplessness of a gifted man who has
nothing to cling to. I think it will do you good
to read it, Connie. Read it again and again,
and thank God, my child, that though you are only a
girl, you have the very thing this man, this genius,
was craving. We admire his talent, but we pity
his weakness. You will feel sorry for him.
You read it, too, Carol. You’ll like it.
We can’t understand it, as I say, because we
are so sure of our God, that we can’t feel what
he felt, having nothing. But we can feel the
heart-break, the fear, the shrinking back from the
Providence that he called Fate, of course
it makes you want to cry, Connie. It is the saddest
poem in the world.”
Connie’s eyes were very bright.
She winked hard a few times, choking back the rush
of tears. Then with an impulsiveness she did not
often show, she lifted her father’s hand and
kissed it passionately.
“Oh, father,” she whispered,
“I was so afraid you wouldn’t
quite see.” She kissed his hand again.
Carol looked at her sister respectfully.
“Connie,” she said, “I certainly
beg your pardon. I just wanted to be clever, and
didn’t know what I was talking about. When
you have finished it, give it to me, will you?
I want to read it, too; I think it must be wonderful.”
She held out a slender shapely hand
and Connie took it quickly, chummily, and the two
girls turned toward the door.
“The danger in reading things,”
said Mr. Starr, and they paused to listen, “the
danger is that we may find arguments we can not answer;
we may feel that we have been in the wrong, that what
we read is right. There’s the danger.
Whenever you find anything like that, Connie, will
you bring it to me? I think I can find the answer
for you. If I don’t know it, I will look
until I come upon it. For we have been given an
answer to every argument. You’ll come to
me, won’t you?”
“Yes, father, I will I know you’ll
find the answers.”
After the door had closed behind them,
Mr. Starr sat for a long time staring straight before
him into space.
“The Connie problem,”
he said at last. And then, “I’ll have
to be better pals with her. Connie’s going
to be pretty fine, I believe.”