EMBARRAS DE RICHESSES
Ventimore had so thoroughly convinced
himself that the released Jinnee was purely a creature
of his own imagination, that he rubbed his eyes with
a start, hoping that they had deceived him.
“Stroke thy head, O merciful
and meritorious one,” said his visitor, “and
recover thy faculties to receive good tidings.
For it is indeed I Fakrash-el-Aamash whom
thou beholdest.”
“I I’m delighted
to see you,” said Horace, as cordially as he
could. “Is there anything I can do for
you?”
“Nay, for hast thou not done
me the greatest of all services by setting me free?
To escape out of a bottle is pleasant. And to
thee I owe my deliverance.”
It was all true, then: he had
really let an imprisoned Genius or Jinnee, or whatever
it was, out of that bottle! He knew he could not
be dreaming now he only wished he were.
However, since it was done, his best course seemed
to be to put a good face on it, and persuade this uncanny
being somehow to go away and leave him in peace for
the future.
“Oh, that’s all right,
my dear sir,” he said, “don’t think
any more about it. I I rather understood
you to say that you were starting on a journey in
search of Solomon?”
“I have been, and returned.
For I visited sundry cities in his dominions, hoping
that by chance I might hear news of him, but I refrained
from asking directly lest thereby I should engender
suspicion, and so Suleyman should learn of my escape
before I could obtain an audience of him and implore
justice.”
“Oh, I shouldn’t think
that was likely,” said Horace. “If
I were you, I should go straight back and go on travelling
till I did find Suleyman.”
“Well was it said: ’Pass
not any door without knocking, lest haply that which
thou seekest should be behind it.’”
“Exactly,” said Horace.
“Do each city thoroughly, house by house, and
don’t neglect the smallest clue. ’If
at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try, again!’
as one of our own poets teaches.”
“‘Try, try, try again,’”
echoed the Jinnee, with an admiration that was almost
fatuous. “Divinely gifted truly was he who
composed such a verse!”
“He has a great reputation as
a sage,” said Horace, “and the maxim is
considered one of his happiest efforts. Don’t
you think that, as the East is rather thickly populated,
the less time you lose in following the poet’s
recommendation the better?”
“It may be as thou sayest.
But know this, O my son, that wheresoever I may wander,
I shall never cease to study how I may most fitly reward
thee for thy kindness towards me. For nobly it
was said: ’If I be possessed of wealth
and be not liberal, may my head never be extended!’”
“My good sir,” said Horace,
“do please understand that if you were to offer
me any reward for for a very ordinary act
of courtesy, I should be obliged to decline it.”
“But didst thou not say that
thou wast sorely in need of a client?”
“That was so at the time,”
said Horace; “but since I last had the pleasure
of seeing you, I have met with one who is all I could
possibly wish for.”
“I am indeed rejoiced to hear
it,” returned the Jinnee, “for thou showest
me that I have succeeded in performing the first service
which thou hast demanded of me.”
Horace staggered under this severe
blow to his pride; for the moment he could only gasp:
“You you sent him to me?”
“I, and no other,” said
the Jinnee, beaming with satisfaction; “for
while, unseen of men, I was circling in air, resolved
to attend to thy affair before beginning my search
for Suleyman (on whom be peace!), it chanced that
I overheard a human being of prosperous appearance
say aloud upon a bridge that he desired to erect for
himself a palace if he could but find an architect.
So, perceiving thee afar off seated at an open casement,
I immediately transported him to the place and delivered
him into thy hands.”
“But he knew my name he
had my card in his pocket,” said Horace.
“I furnished him with the paper
containing thy names and abode, lest he should be
ignorant of them.”
“Well, look here, Mr. Fakrash,”
said the unfortunate Horace, “I know you meant
well but never do a thing like that
again! If my brother-architects came to know
of it I should be accused of most unprofessional behaviour.
I’d no idea you would take that way of introducing
a client to me, or I should have stopped it at once!”
“It was an error,” said
Fakrash. “No matter. I will undo this
affair, and devise some other and better means of
serving thee.”
“No, no,” he said, “for
Heaven’s sake, leave things alone you’ll
only make them worse. Forgive me, my dear Mr.
Fakrash, I’m afraid I must seem most ungrateful;
but but I was so taken by surprise.
And really, I am extremely obliged to you. For,
though the means you took were were
a little irregular, you have done me a very great
service.”
“It is naught,” said the
Jinnee, “compared to those I hope to render so
great a benefactor.”
“But, indeed, you mustn’t
think of trying to do any more for me,” urged
Horace, who felt the absolute necessity of expelling
any scheme of further benevolence from the Jinnee’s
head once and for all. “You have done enough.
Why, thanks to you, I am engaged to build a palace
that will keep me hard at work and happy for ever
so long.”
“Are human beings, then, so
enamoured of hard labour?” asked Fakrash, in
wonder. “It is not thus with the Jinn.”
“I love my work for its own
sake,” said Horace, “and then, when I have
finished it, I shall have earned a very fair amount
of money which is particularly important
to me just now.”
“And why, my son, art thou so
desirous of obtaining riches?”
“Because,” said Horace,
“unless a man is tolerably well off in these
days he cannot hope to marry.”
Fakrash smiled with indulgent compassion.
“How excellent is the saying of one of old:
’He that adventureth upon matrimony is like unto
one who thrusteth his hand into a sack containing
many thousands of serpents and one eel. Yet,
if Fate so decree, he may draw forth the eel.’
And thou art comely, and of an age when it is natural
to desire the love of a maiden. Therefore be
of good heart and a cheerful eye, and it may be that,
when I am more at leisure, I shall find thee a helpmate
who shall rejoice thy soul.”
“Please don’t trouble
to find me anything of the sort!” said Horace,
hastily, with a mental vision of some helpless and
scandalised stranger being shot into his dwelling
like coals. “I assure you I would much
rather win a wife for myself in the ordinary way as,
thanks to your kindness, I have every hope of doing
before long.”
“Is there already some damsel
for whom thy heart pineth? If so, fear not to
tell me her names and dwelling place, and I will assuredly
obtain her for thee.”
But Ventimore had seen enough of the
Jinnee’s Oriental methods to doubt his tact
and discretion where Sylvia was concerned. “No,
no; of course not. I spoke generally,”
he said. “It’s exceedingly kind of
you but I do wish I could make you
understand that I am overpaid as it is. You have
put me in the way to make a name and fortune for myself.
If I fail, it will be my own fault. And, at all
events, I want nothing more from you. If you
mean to find Suleyman (on whom be peace!) you must
go and live in the East altogether for
he certainly isn’t over here; you must give
up your whole time to it, keep as quiet as possible,
and don’t be discouraged by any reports you
may hear. Above all, never trouble your head
about me or my affairs again!”
“O thou of wisdom and eloquence,”
said Fakrash, “this is most excellent advice.
I will go, then; but may I drink the cup of perdition
If I become unmindful of thy benevolence!”
And, raising his joined hands above
his head as he spoke, he sank, feet foremost, through
the carpet and was gone.
“Thank Heaven,” thought
Ventimore, “he’s taken the hint at last.
I don’t think I’m likely to see any more
of him. I feel an ungrateful brute for saying
so, but I can’t help it. I can not
stand being under any obligation to a Jinnee who’s
been shut up in a beastly brass bottle ever since
the days of Solomon, who probably had very good reasons
for putting him there.”
Horace next asked himself whether
he was bound in honour to disclose the facts to Mr.
Wackerbath, and give him the opportunity of withdrawing
from the agreement if he thought fit.
On the whole, he saw no necessity
for telling him anything; the only possible result
would be to make his client suspect his sanity; and
who would care to employ an insane architect?
Then, if he retired from the undertaking without any
explanations, what could he say to Sylvia? What
would Sylvia’s father say to him?
There would certainly be an end to his engagement.
After all, he had not been to blame;
the Wackerbaths were quite satisfied. He felt
perfectly sure that he could justify their selection
of him; he would wrong nobody by accepting the commission,
while he would only offend them, injure himself irretrievably,
and lose all hope of gaining Sylvia if he made any
attempt to undeceive them.
And Fakrash was gone, never to return.
So, on all these considerations, Horace decided that
silence was his only possible policy, and, though
some moralists may condemn his conduct as disingenuous
and wanting in true moral courage, I venture to doubt
whether any reader, however independent, straightforward,
and indifferent to notoriety and ridicule, would have
behaved otherwise in Ventimore’s extremely delicate
and difficult position.
Some days passed, every working hour
of which was spent by Horace in the rapture of creation.
To every man with the soul of an artist in him there
comes at times only too seldom in most cases a
revelation of latent power that he had not dared to
hope for. And now with Ventimore years of study
and theorising which he had often been tempted to think
wasted began to bear golden fruit. He designed
and drew with a rapidity and originality, a sense
of perfect mastery of the various problems to be dealt
with, and a delight in the working out of mass and
detail, so intoxicating that he almost dreaded lest
he should be the victim of some self-delusion.
His evenings were of course spent
with the Futvoyes, in discovering Sylvia in some new
and yet more adorable aspect. Altogether, he was
very much in love, very happy, and very busy three
states not invariably found in combination.
And, as he had foreseen, he had effectually
got rid of Fakrash, who was evidently too engrossed
in the pursuit of Solomon to think of anything else.
And there seemed no reason why he should abandon his
search for a generation or two, for it would probably
take all that time to convince him that that mighty
monarch was no longer on the throne.
“It would have been too brutal
to tell him myself,” thought Horace, “when
he was so keen on having his case reheard. And
it gives him an object, poor old buffer, and keeps
him from interfering in my affairs, so it’s
best for both of us.”
Horace’s little dinner-party
had been twice postponed, till he had begun to have
a superstitious fear that it would never come off;
but at length the Professor had been induced to give
an absolute promise for a certain evening.
On the day before, after breakfast,
Horace had summoned his landlady to a consultation
on the menu. “Nothing elaborate,
you know, Mrs. Rapkin,” said Horace, who, though
he would have liked to provide a feast of all procurable
delicacies for Sylvia’s refection, was obliged
to respect her father’s prejudices. “Just
a simple dinner, thoroughly well cooked, and nicely
served as you know so well how to do it.”
“I suppose, sir, you would require Rapkin to
wait?”
As the ex-butler was liable to trances
on these occasions during which he could do nothing
but smile and bow with speechless politeness as he
dropped sauce-boats and plates, Horace replied that
he thought of having someone in to avoid troubling
Mr. Rapkin; but his wife expressed such confidence
in her husband’s proving equal to all emergencies,
that Ventimore waived the point, and left it to her
to hire extra help if she thought fit.
“Now, what soup can you give
us?” he inquired, as Mrs. Rapkin stood at attention
and quite unmollified.
After protracted mental conflict,
she grudgingly suggested gravy soup which
Horace thought too unenterprising, and rejected in
favour of mock turtle. “Well then, fish?”
he continued; “how about fish?”
Mrs. Rapkin dragged the depths of
her culinary resources for several seconds, and finally
brought to the surface what she called “a nice
fried sole.” Horace would not hear of it,
and urged her to aspire to salmon; she substituted
smelts, which he opposed by a happy inspiration of
turbot and lobster sauce. The sauce, however,
presented insuperable difficulties to her mind, and
she offered a compromise in the form of cod which
he finally accepted as a fish which the Professor could
hardly censure for ostentation.
Next came the no less difficult questions
of entree or no entree, of joint and
bird. “What’s in season just now?”
said Horace; “let me see” and
glanced out of the window as he spoke, as though in
search of some outside suggestion.... “Camels,
by Jove!” he suddenly exclaimed.
“Camels, Mr. Ventimore,
sir?” repeated Mrs. Rapkin, in some bewilderment;
and then, remembering that he was given to untimely
flippancy, she gave a tolerant little cough.
“I’ll be shot if they
aren’t camels!” said Horace.
“What do you make of ’em, Mrs.
Rapkin?”
Out of the faint mist which hung over
the farther end of the square advanced a procession
of tall, dust-coloured animals, with long, delicately
poised necks and a mincing gait. Even Mrs. Rapkin
could not succeed in making anything of them except
camels.
“What the deuce does a caravan
of camels want in Vincent Square?” said Horace,
with a sudden qualm for which he could not account.
“Most likely they belong to
the Barnum Show, sir,” suggested his landlady.
“I did hear they were coming to Olympia again
this year.”
“Why, of course,” cried
Horace, intensely relieved. “It’s
on their way from the Docks at least, it
isn’t out of their way. Or probably
the main road’s up for repairs. That’s
it they’ll turn off to the left at
the corner. See, they’ve got Arab drivers
with them. Wonderful how the fellows manage them.”
“It seems to me, sir,”
said Mrs. Rapkin, “that they’re coming
our way they seem to be stopping
outside.”
“Don’t talk such infernal
I beg your pardon, Mrs. Rapkin; but why on earth should
Barnum and Bailey’s camels come out of their
way to call on me? It’s ridiculous,
you know!” said Horace, irritably.
“Ridicklous it may be,
sir,” she retorted, “but they’re
all layin’ down on the road opposite our door,
as you can see and them niggers is making
signs to you to come out and speak to ’em.”
It was true enough. One by one
the camels, which were apparently of the purest breed,
folded themselves up in a row like campstools at a
sign from their attendants, who were now making profound
salaams towards the window where Ventimore was standing.
“I suppose I’d better
go down and see what they want,” he said, with
rather a sickly smile. “They may have lost
the way to Olympia.... I only hope Fakrash isn’t
at the bottom of this,” he thought, as he went
downstairs. “But he’d come himself at
all events, he wouldn’t send me a message on
such a lot of camels!” As he appeared on the
doorstep, all the drivers flopped down and rubbed
their flat, black noses on the curbstone.
“For Heaven’s sake get
up!” said Horace angrily. “This isn’t
Hammersmith. Turn to the left, into the Vauxhall
Bridge Road, and ask a policeman the nearest way to
Olympia.”
“Be not angry with thy slaves!”
said the head driver, in excellent English. “We
are here by command of Fakrash-el-Aamash, our lord,
whom we are bound to obey. And we have brought
thee these as gifts.”
“My compliments to your master,”
said Horace, between his teeth, “and tell him
that a London architect has no sort of occasion for
camels. Say that I am extremely obliged but
am compelled to decline them.”
“O highly born one,” explained
the driver, “the camels are not a gift but
the loads which are upon the camels. Suffer us,
therefore, since we dare not disobey our lord’s
commands, to carry these trifling tokens of his good
will into thy dwelling and depart in peace.”
Horace had not noticed till then that
every camel bore a heavy burden, which the attendants
were now unloading. “Oh, if you must!”
he said, not too graciously; “only do look sharp
about it there’s a crowd collecting
already, and I don’t want to have a constable
here.”
He returned to his rooms, where he
found Mrs. Rapkin paralysed with amazement. “It’s it’s
all right,” he said; “I’d forgotten it’s
only a few Oriental things from the place where that
brass bottle came from, you know. They’ve
left them here on approval.”
“Seems funny their sending their
goods ’ome on camels, sir, doesn’t it?”
said Mrs. Rapkin.
“Not at all funny!” said
Horace; “they they’re an enterprising
firm their way of advertising.”
One after another, a train of dusky
attendants entered, each of whom deposited his load
on the floor with a guttural grunt and returned backward,
until the sitting-room was blocked with piles of sacks,
and bales, and chests, whereupon the head driver appeared
and intimated that the tale of gifts was complete.
“I wonder what sort of tip this
fellow expects,” thought Horace; “a sovereign
seems shabby but it’s all I can run
to. I’ll try him with that.”
But the overseer repudiated all idea
of a gratuity with stately dignity, and as Horace
saw him to the gate, he found a stolid constable by
the railings.
“This won’t do,
you know,” said the constable; “these ’ere
camels must move on or I shall ’ave
to interfere.”
“It’s all right, constable,”
said Horace, pressing into his hand the sovereign
the head driver had rejected; “they’re
going to move on now. They’ve brought me
a few presents from from a friend of mine
in the East.”
By this time the attendants had mounted
the kneeling camels, which rose with them, and swung
off round the square in a long, swaying trot that
soon left the crowd far behind, staring blankly after
the caravan as camel after camel disappeared into
the haze.
“I shouldn’t mind knowin’
that friend o’ yours, sir,” said the constable;
“open-hearted sort o’ gentleman, I should
think?”
“Very!” said Horace, savagely,
and returned to his room, which Mrs. Rapkin had now
left.
His hands shook, though not with joy,
as he untied some of the sacks and bales and forced
open the outlandish-looking chests, the contents of
which almost took away his breath.
For in the bales were carpets and
tissues which he saw at a glance must be of fabulous
antiquity and beyond all price; the sacks held golden
ewers and vessels of strange workmanship and pantomimic
proportions; the chests were full of jewels ropes
of creamy-pink pearls as large as average onions,
strings of uncut rubies and emeralds, the smallest
of which would have been a tight fit in an ordinary
collar-box, and diamonds, roughly facetted and polished,
each the size of a coconut, in whose hearts quivered
a liquid and prismatic radiance.
On the most moderate computation,
the total value of these gifts could hardly be less
than several hundred millions; never probably in the
world’s history had any treasury contained so
rich a store.
It would have been difficult for anybody,
on suddenly finding himself the possessor of this
immense incalculable wealth, to make any comment quite
worthy of the situation, but, surely, none could have
been more inadequate and indeed inappropriate than
Horace’s which, heartfelt as it was,
was couched in the simple monosyllable “Damn!”