CHAPTER I
Among the many fatalities attending
the bloom of young desire, that of blindly taking
to the confectionery line has not, perhaps, been sufficiently
considered. How is the son of a British yeoman,
who has been fed principally on salt pork and yeast
dumplings, to know that there is satiety for the human
stomach even in a paradise of glass jars full of sugared
almonds and pink lozenges, and that the tedium of life
can reach a pitch where plum-buns at discretion cease
to offer the slightest excitement? Or how, at
the tender age when a confectioner seems to him a
very prince whom all the world must envy who
breakfasts on macaroons, dines on meringues, sups
on twelfth-cake, and fills up the intermediate hours
with sugar-candy or peppermint how is he
to foresee the day of sad wisdom, when he will discern
that the confectioner’s calling is not socially
influential, or favourable to a soaring ambition?
I have known a man who turned out to have a metaphysical
genius, incautiously, in the period of youthful buoyancy,
commence his career as a dancing-master; and you may
imagine the use that was made of this initial mistake
by opponents who felt themselves bound to warn the
public against his doctrine of the Inconceivable.
He could not give up his dancing-lessons, because
he made his bread by them, and metaphysics would not
have found him in so much as salt to his bread.
It was really the same with Mr. David Faux and the
confectionery business. His uncle, the butler
at the great house close by Brigford, had made a pet
of him in his early boyhood, and it was on a visit
to this uncle that the confectioners’ shops
in that brilliant town had, on a single day, fired
his tender imagination. He carried home the
pleasing illusion that a confectioner must be at once
the happiest and the foremost of men, since the things
he made were not only the most beautiful to behold,
but the very best eating, and such as the Lord Mayor
must always order largely for his private recreation;
so that when his father declared he must be put to
a trade, David chose his line without a moment’s
hesitation; and, with a rashness inspired by a sweet
tooth, wedded himself irrevocably to confectionery.
Soon, however, the tooth lost its relish and fell
into blank indifference; and all the while, his mind
expanded, his ambition took new shapes, which could
hardly be satisfied within the sphere his youthful
ardour had chosen. But what was he to do?
He was a young man of much mental activity, and,
above all, gifted with a spirit of contrivance; but
then, his faculties would not tell with great effect
in any other medium than that of candied sugars, conserves,
and pastry. Say what you will about the identity
of the reasoning process in all branches of thought,
or about the advantage of coming to subjects with a
fresh mind, the adjustment of butter to flour, and
of heat to pastry, is not the best preparation
for the office of prime minister; besides, in the
present imperfectly-organized state of society, there
are social barriers. David could invent delightful
things in the way of drop-cakes, and he had the widest
views of the sugar department; but in other directions
he certainly felt hampered by the want of knowledge
and practical skill; and the world is so inconveniently
constituted, that the vague consciousness of being
a fine fellow is no guarantee of success in any line
of business.
This difficulty pressed with some
severity on Mr. David Faux, even before his apprenticeship
was ended. His soul swelled with an impatient
sense that he ought to become something very remarkable that
it was quite out of the question for him to put up
with a narrow lot as other men did: he scorned
the idea that he could accept an average. He
was sure there was nothing average about him:
even such a person as Mrs. Tibbits, the washer-woman,
perceived it, and probably had a preference for his
linen. At that particular period he was weighing
out gingerbread nuts; but such an anomaly could not
continue. No position could be suited to Mr.
David Faux that was not in the highest degree easy
to the flesh and flattering to the spirit. If
he had fallen on the present times, and enjoyed the
advantages of a Mechanic’s Institute, he would
certainly have taken to literature and have written
reviews; but his education had not been liberal.
He had read some novels from the adjoining circulating
library, and had even bought the story of Inkle
and Yarico, which had made him feel very sorry
for poor Mr. Inkle; so that his ideas might not have
been below a certain mark of the literary calling;
but his spelling and diction were too unconventional.
When a man is not adequately appreciated
or comfortably placed in his own country, his thoughts
naturally turn towards foreign climes; and David’s
imagination circled round and round the utmost limits
of his geographical knowledge, in search of a country
where a young gentleman of pasty visage, lipless mouth,
and stumpy hair, would be likely to be received with
the hospitable enthusiasm which he had a right to expect.
Having a general idea of America as a country where
the population was chiefly black, it appeared to him
the most propitious destination for an emigrant who,
to begin with, had the broad and easily recognizable
merit of whiteness; and this idea gradually took such
strong possession of him that Satan seized the opportunity
of suggesting to him that he might emigrate under
easier circumstances, if he supplied himself with a
little money from his master’s till. But
that evil spirit, whose understanding, I am convinced,
has been much overrated, quite wasted his time on this
occasion. David would certainly have liked well
to have some of his master’s money in his pocket,
if he had been sure his master would have been the
only man to suffer for it; but he was a cautious youth,
and quite determined to run no risks on his own account.
So he stayed out his apprenticeship, and committed
no act of dishonesty that was at all likely to be
discovered, reserving his plan of emigration for a
future opportunity. And the circumstances under
which he carried it out were in this wise. Having
been at home a week or two partaking of the family
beans, he had used his leisure in ascertaining a fact
which was of considerable importance to him, namely,
that his mother had a small sum in guineas painfully
saved from her maiden perquisites, and kept in the
corner of a drawer where her baby-linen had reposed
for the last twenty years ever since her
son David had taken to his feet, with a slight promise
of bow-legs which had not been altogether unfulfilled.
Mr. Faux, senior, had told his son very frankly,
that he must not look to being set up in business
by him: with seven sons, and one of them
a very healthy and well-developed idiot, who consumed
a dumpling about eight inches in diameter every day,
it was pretty well if they got a hundred apiece at
his death. Under these circumstances, what was
David to do? It was certainly hard that he should
take his mother’s money; but he saw no other
ready means of getting any, and it was not to be expected
that a young man of his merit should put up with inconveniences
that could be avoided. Besides, it is not robbery
to take property belonging to your mother: she
doesn’t prosecute you. And David was very
well behaved to his mother; he comforted her by speaking
highly of himself to her, and assuring her that he
never fell into the vices he saw practised by other
youths of his own age, and that he was particularly
fond of honesty. If his mother would have given
him her twenty guineas as a reward of this noble disposition,
he really would not have stolen them from her, and
it would have been more agreeable to his feelings.
Nevertheless, to an active mind like David’s,
ingenuity is not without its pleasures: it was
rather an interesting occupation to become stealthily
acquainted with the wards of his mother’s simple
key (not in the least like Chubb’s patent),
and to get one that would do its work equally well;
and also to arrange a little drama by which he would
escape suspicion, and run no risk of forfeiting the
prospective hundred at his father’s death, which
would be convenient in the improbable case of his
not making a large fortune in the “Indies.”
First, he spoke freely of his intention
to start shortly for Liverpool and take ship for America;
a resolution which cost his good mother some pain,
for, after Jacob the idiot, there was not one of her
sons to whom her heart clung more than to her youngest-born,
David. Next, it appeared to him that Sunday
afternoon, when everybody was gone to church except
Jacob and the cowboy, was so singularly favourable
an opportunity for sons who wanted to appropriate
their mothers’ guineas, that he half thought
it must have been kindly intended by Providence for
such purposes. Especially the third Sunday in
Lent; because Jacob had been out on one of his occasional
wanderings for the last two days; and David, being
a timid young man, had a considerable dread and hatred
of Jacob, as of a large personage who went about habitually
with a pitchfork in his hand.
Nothing could be easier, then, than
for David on this Sunday afternoon to decline going
to church, on the ground that he was going to tea at
Mr. Lunn’s, whose pretty daughter Sally had
been an early flame of his, and, when the church-goers
were at a safe distance, to abstract the guineas from
their wooden box and slip them into a small canvas
bag nothing easier than to call to the
cowboy that he was going, and tell him to keep an
eye on the house for fear of Sunday tramps. David
thought it would be easy, too, to get to a small thicket
and bury his bag in a hole he had already made and
covered up under the roots of an old hollow ash, and
he had, in fact, found the hole without a moment’s
difficulty, had uncovered it, and was about gently
to drop the bag into it, when the sound of a large
body rustling towards him with something like a bellow
was such a surprise to David, who, as a gentleman
gifted with much contrivance, was naturally only prepared
for what he expected, that instead of dropping the
bag gently he let it fall so as to make it untwist
and vomit forth the shining guineas. In the
same moment he looked up and saw his dear brother
Jacob close upon him, holding the pitchfork so that
the bright smooth prongs were a yard in advance of
his own body, and about a foot off David’s.
(A learned friend, to whom I once narrated this history,
observed that it was David’s guilt which made
these prongs formidable, and that the “mens
nil conscia sibi” strips a pitchfork
of all terrors. I thought this idea so valuable,
that I obtained his leave to use it on condition of
suppressing his name.) Nevertheless, David did not
entirely lose his presence of mind; for in that case
he would have sunk on the earth or started backward;
whereas he kept his ground and smiled at Jacob, who
nodded his head up and down, and said, “Hoich,
Zavy!” in a painfully equivocal manner.
David’s heart was beating audibly, and if he
had had any lips they would have been pale; but his
mental activity, instead of being paralysed, was stimulated.
While he was inwardly praying (he always prayed when
he was much frightened) “Oh, save
me this once, and I’ll never get into danger
again!” he was thrusting his hand
into his pocket in search of a box of yellow lozenges,
which he had brought with him from Brigford among
other delicacies of the same portable kind, as a means
of conciliating proud beauty, and more particularly
the beauty of Miss Sarah Lunn. Not one of these
delicacies had he ever offered to poor Jacob, for
David was not a young man to waste his jujubes
and barley-sugar in giving pleasure to people from
whom he expected nothing. But an idiot with
equivocal intentions and a pitchfork is as well worth
flattering and cajoling as if he were Louis Napoleon.
So David, with a promptitude equal to the occasion,
drew out his box of yellow lozenges, lifted the lid,
and performed a pantomime with his mouth and fingers,
which was meant to imply that he was delighted to see
his dear brother Jacob, and seized the opportunity
of making him a small present, which he would find
particularly agreeable to the taste. Jacob,
you understand, was not an intense idiot, but within
a certain limited range knew how to choose the good
and reject the evil: he took one lozenge, by
way of test, and sucked it as if he had been a philosopher;
then, in as great an ecstacy at its new and complex
savour as Caliban at the taste of Trinculo’s
wine, chuckled and stroked this suddenly beneficent
brother, and held out his hand for more; for, except
in fits of anger, Jacob was not ferocious or needlessly
predatory. David’s courage half returned,
and he left off praying; pouring a dozen lozenges
into Jacob’s palm, and trying to look very fond
of him. He congratulated himself that he had
formed the plan of going to see Miss Sally Lunn this
afternoon, and that, as a consequence, he had brought
with him these propitiatory delicacies: he was
certainly a lucky fellow; indeed, it was always likely
Providence should be fonder of him than of other apprentices,
and since he was to be interrupted, why, an
idiot was preferable to any other sort of witness.
For the first time in his life, David thought he
saw the advantage of idiots.
As for Jacob, he had thrust his pitchfork
into the ground, and had thrown himself down beside
it, in thorough abandonment to the unprecedented pleasure
of having five lozenges in his mouth at once, blinking
meanwhile, and making inarticulate sounds of gustative
content. He had not yet given any sign of noticing
the guineas, but in seating himself he had laid his
broad right hand on them, and unconsciously kept it
in that position, absorbed in the sensations of his
palate. If he could only be kept so occupied
with the lozenges as not to see the guineas before
David could manage to cover them! That was David’s
best hope of safety; for Jacob knew his mother’s
guineas; it had been part of their common experience
as boys to be allowed to look at these handsome coins,
and rattle them in their box on high days and holidays,
and among all Jacob’s narrow experiences as
to money, this was likely to be the most memorable.
“Here, Jacob,” said David,
in an insinuating tone, handing the box to him, “I’ll
give ’em all to you. Run! make
haste! else somebody’ll come and
take ’em.”
David, not having studied the psychology
of idiots, was not aware that they are not to be wrought
upon by imaginative fears. Jacob took the box
with his left hand, but saw no necessity for running
away. Was ever a promising young man wishing
to lay the foundation of his fortune by appropriating
his mother’s guineas obstructed by such a day-mare
as this? But the moment must come when Jacob
would move his right hand to draw off the lid of the
tin box, and then David would sweep the guineas into
the hole with the utmost address and swiftness, and
immediately seat himself upon them. Ah, no!
It’s of no use to have foresight when you are
dealing with an idiot: he is not to be calculated
upon. Jacob’s right hand was given to
vague clutching and throwing; it suddenly clutched
the guineas as if they had been so many pebbles, and
was raised in an attitude which promised to scatter
them like seed over a distant bramble, when, from
some prompting or other probably of an unwonted
sensation it paused, descended to Jacob’s
knee, and opened slowly under the inspection of Jacob’s
dull eyes. David began to pray again, but immediately
desisted another resource having occurred
to him.
“Mother! zinnies!” exclaimed
the innocent Jacob. Then, looking at David,
he said, interrogatively, “Box?”
“Hush! hush!” said David,
summoning all his ingenuity in this severe strait.
“See, Jacob!” He took the tin box from
his brother’s hand, and emptied it of the lozenges,
returning half of them to Jacob, but secretly keeping
the rest in his own hand. Then he held out the
empty box, and said, “Here’s the box,
Jacob! The box for the guineas!” gently
sweeping them from Jacob’s palm into the box.
This procedure was not objectionable
to Jacob; on the contrary, the guineas clinked so
pleasantly as they fell, that he wished for a repetition
of the sound, and seizing the box, began to rattle
it very gleefully. David, seizing the opportunity,
deposited his reserve of lozenges in the ground and
hastily swept some earth over them. “Look,
Jacob!” he said, at last. Jacob paused
from his clinking, and looked into the hole, while
David began to scratch away the earth, as if in doubtful
expectation. When the lozenges were laid bare,
he took them out one by one, and gave them to Jacob.
“Hush!” he said, in a loud whisper, “Tell
nobody all for Jacob hush sh sh!
Put guineas in the hole they’ll
come out like this!” To make the lesson more
complete, he took a guinea, and lowering it into the
hole, said, “Put in so.” Then,
as he took the last lozenge out, he said, “Come
out so,” and put the lozenge into Jacob’s
hospitable mouth.
Jacob turned his head on one side,
looked first at his brother and then at the hole,
like a reflective monkey, and, finally, laid the box
of guineas in the hole with much decision. David
made haste to add every one of the stray coins, put
on the lid, and covered it well with earth, saying
in his meet coaxing tone
“Take ’m out to-morrow,
Jacob; all for Jacob! Hush sh sh!”
Jacob, to whom this once indifferent
brother had all at once become a sort of sweet-tasted
fetish, stroked David’s best coat with his adhesive
fingers, and then hugged him with an accompaniment
of that mingled chuckling and gurgling by which he
was accustomed to express the milder passions.
But if he had chosen to bite a small morsel out of
his beneficent brother’s cheek, David would
have been obliged to bear it.
And here I must pause, to point out
to you the short-sightedness of human contrivance.
This ingenious young man, Mr. David Faux, thought
he had achieved a triumph of cunning when he had associated
himself in his brother’s rudimentary mind with
the flavour of yellow lozenges. But he had yet
to learn that it is a dreadful thing to make an idiot
fond of you, when you yourself are not of an affectionate
disposition: especially an idiot with a pitchfork obviously
a difficult friend to shake off by rough usage.
It may seem to you rather a blundering
contrivance for a clever young man to bury the guineas.
But, if everything had turned out as David had calculated,
you would have seen that his plan was worthy of his
talents. The guineas would have lain safely in
the earth while the theft was discovered, and David,
with the calm of conscious innocence, would have lingered
at home, reluctant to say good-bye to his dear mother
while she was in grief about her guineas; till at
length, on the eve of his departure, he would have
disinterred them in the strictest privacy, and carried
them on his own person without inconvenience.
But David, you perceive, had reckoned without his
host, or, to speak more precisely, without his idiot
brother an item of so uncertain and fluctuating
a character, that I doubt whether he would not have
puzzled the astute heroes of M. de Balzac, whose foresight
is so remarkably at home in the future.
It was clear to David now that he
had only one alternative before him: he must
either renounce the guineas, by quietly putting them
back in his mother’s drawer (a course not unattended
with difficulty); or he must leave more than a suspicion
behind him, by departing early the next morning without
giving notice, and with the guineas in his pocket.
For if he gave notice that he was going, his mother,
he knew, would insist on fetching from her box of
guineas the three she had always promised him as his
share; indeed, in his original plan, he had counted
on this as a means by which the theft would be discovered
under circumstances that would themselves speak for
his innocence; but now, as I need hardly explain,
that well-combined plan was completely frustrated.
Even if David could have bribed Jacob with perpetual
lozenges, an idiot’s secrecy is itself betrayal.
He dared not even go to tea at Mr. Lunn’s, for
in that case he would have lost sight of Jacob, who,
in his impatience for the crop of lozenges, might
scratch up the box again while he was absent, and
carry it home depriving him at once of reputation
and guineas. No! he must think of nothing all
the rest of this day, but of coaxing Jacob and keeping
him out of mischief. It was a fatiguing and anxious
evening to David; nevertheless, he dared not go to
sleep without tying a piece of string to his thumb
and great toe, to secure his frequent waking; for he
meant to be up with the first peep of dawn, and be
far out of reach before breakfast-time. His
father, he thought, would certainly cut him off with
a shilling; but what then? Such a striking young
man as he would be sure to be well received in the
West Indies: in foreign countries there are always
openings even for cats. It was probable
that some Princess Yarico would want him to marry
her, and make him presents of very large jewels beforehand;
after which, he needn’t marry her unless he
liked. David had made up his mind not to steal
any more, even from people who were fond of him:
it was an unpleasant way of making your fortune in
a world where you were likely to surprised in the act
by brothers. Such alarms did not agree with
David’s constitution, and he had felt so much
nausea this evening that no doubt his liver was affected.
Besides, he would have been greatly hurt not to be
thought well of in the world: he always meant
to make a figure, and be thought worthy of the best
seats and the best morsels.
Ruminating to this effect on the brilliant
future in reserve for him, David by the help of his
check-string kept himself on the alert to seize the
time of earliest dawn for his rising and departure.
His brothers, of course, were early risers, but he
should anticipate them by at least an hour and a half,
and the little room which he had to himself as only
an occasional visitor, had its window over the horse-block,
so that he could slip out through the window without
the least difficulty. Jacob, the horrible Jacob,
had an awkward trick of getting up before everybody
else, to stem his hunger by emptying the milk-bowl
that was “duly set” for him; but of late
he had taken to sleeping in the hay-loft, and if he
came into the house, it would be on the opposite side
to that from which David was making his exit.
There was no need to think of Jacob; yet David was
liberal enough to bestow a curse on him it
was the only thing he ever did bestow gratuitously.
His small bundle of clothes was ready packed, and
he was soon treading lightly on the steps of the horse-block,
soon walking at a smart pace across the fields towards
the thicket. It would take him no more than
two minutes to get out the box; he could make out
the tree it was under by the pale strip where the bark
was off, although the dawning light was rather dimmer
in the thicket. But what, in the name of burnt
pastry was that large body with a staff
planted beside it, close at the foot of the ash-tree?
David paused, not to make up his mind as to the nature
of the apparition he had not the happiness
of doubting for a moment that the staff was Jacob’s
pitchfork but to gather the self-command
necessary for addressing his brother with a sufficiently
honeyed accent. Jacob was absorbed in scratching
up the earth, and had not heard David’s approach.
“I say, Jacob,” said David
in a loud whisper, just as the tin box was lifted
out of the hole.
Jacob looked up, and discerning his
sweet-flavoured brother, nodded and grinned in the
dim light in a way that made him seem to David like
a triumphant demon. If he had been of an impetuous
disposition, he would have snatched the pitchfork
from the ground and impaled this fraternal demon.
But David was by no means impetuous; he was a young
man greatly given to calculate consequences, a habit
which has been held to be the foundation of virtue.
But somehow it had not precisely that effect in David:
he calculated whether an action would harm himself,
or whether it would only harm other people.
In the former case he was very timid about satisfying
his immediate desires, but in the latter he would risk
the result with much courage.
“Give it me, Jacob,” he
said, stooping down and patting his brother.
“Let us see.”
Jacob, finding the lid rather tight,
gave the box to his brother in perfect faith.
David raised the lids and shook his head, while Jacob
put his finger in and took out a guinea to taste whether
the metamorphosis into lozenges was complete and satisfactory.
“No, Jacob; too soon, too soon,”
said David, when the guinea had been tasted.
“Give it me; we’ll go and bury it somewhere
else; we’ll put it in yonder,” he added,
pointing vaguely toward the distance.
David screwed on the lid, while Jacob,
looking grave, rose and grasped his pitchfork.
Then, seeing David’s bundle, he snatched it,
like a too officious Newfoundland, stuck his pitchfork
into it and carried it over his shoulder in triumph
as he accompanied David and the box out of the thicket.
What on earth was David to do?
It would have been easy to frown at Jacob, and kick
him, and order him to get away; but David dared as
soon have kicked the bull. Jacob was quiet as
long as he was treated indulgently; but on the slightest
show of anger, he became unmanageable, and was liable
to fits of fury which would have made him formidable
even without his pitchfork. There was no mastery
to be obtained over him except by kindness or guile.
David tried guile.
“Go, Jacob,” he said,
when they were out of the thicket pointing
towards the house as he spoke; “go and fetch
me a spade a spade. But give me
the bundle,” he added, trying to reach it from
the fork, where it hung high above Jacob’s tall
shoulder.
But Jacob showed as much alacrity
in obeying as a wasp shows in leaving a sugar-basin.
Near David, he felt himself in the vicinity of lozenges:
he chuckled and rubbed his brother’s back, brandishing
the bundle higher out of reach. David, with
an inward groan, changed his tactics, and walked on
as fast as he could. It was not safe to linger.
Jacob would get tired of following him, or, at all
events, could be eluded. If they could once
get to the distant highroad, a coach would overtake
them, David would mount it, having previously by some
ingenious means secured his bundle, and then Jacob
might howl and flourish his pitchfork as much as he
liked. Meanwhile he was under the fatal necessity
of being very kind to this ogre, and of providing
a large breakfast for him when they stopped at a roadside
inn. It was already three hours since they had
started, and David was tired. Would no coach
be coming up soon? he inquired. No coach for
the next two hours. But there was a carrier’s
cart to come immediately, on its way to the next town.
If he could slip out, even leaving his bundle behind,
and get into the cart without Jacob! But there
was a new obstacle. Jacob had recently discovered
a remnant of sugar-candy in one of his brother’s
tail-pockets; and, since then, had cautiously kept
his hold on that limb of the garment, perhaps with
an expectation that there would be a further development
of sugar-candy after a longer or shorter interval.
Now every one who has worn a coat will understand
the sensibilities that must keep a man from starting
away in a hurry when there is a grasp on his coat-tail.
David looked forward to being well received among
strangers, but it might make a difference if he had
only one tail to his coat.
He felt himself in a cold perspiration.
He could walk no more: he must get into the
cart and let Jacob get in with him. Presently
a cheering idea occurred to him: after so large
a breakfast, Jacob would be sure to go to sleep in
the cart; you see at once that David meant to seize
his bundle, jump out, and be free. His expectation
was partly fulfilled: Jacob did go to sleep in
the cart, but it was in a peculiar attitude it
was with his arms tightly fastened round his dear brother’s
body; and if ever David attempted to move, the grasp
tightened with the force of an affectionate boa-constrictor.
“Th’ innicent’s
fond on you,” observed the carrier, thinking
that David was probably an amiable brother, and wishing
to pay him a compliment.
David groaned. The ways of thieving
were not ways of pleasantness. Oh, why had he
an idiot brother? Oh, why, in general, was the
world so constituted that a man could not take his
mother’s guineas comfortably? David became
grimly speculative.
Copious dinner at noon for Jacob;
but little dinner, because little appetite, for David.
Instead of eating, he plied Jacob with beer; for
through this liberality he descried a hope. Jacob
fell into a dead sleep, at last, without having his
arms round David, who paid the reckoning, took his
bundle, and walked off. In another half-hour
he was on the coach on his way to Liverpool, smiling
the smile of the triumphant wicked. He was rid
of Jacob he was bound for the Indies, where
a gullible princess awaited him. He would never
steal any more, but there would be no need; he would
show himself so deserving, that people would make
him presents freely. He must give up the notion
of his father’s legacy; but it was not likely
he would ever want that trifle; and even if he did why,
it was a compensation to think that in being for ever
divided from his family he was divided from Jacob,
more terrible than Gorgon or Demogorgon to David’s
timid green eyes. Thank heaven, he should never
see Jacob any more!
CHAPTER II
It was nearly six years after the
departure of Mr. David Faux for the West Indies, that
the vacant shop in the market-place at Grimworth was
understood to have been let to the stranger with a
sallow complexion and a buff cravat, whose first appearance
had caused some excitement in the bar of the Woolpack,
where he had called to wait for the coach.
Grimworth, to a discerning eye, was
a good place to set up shopkeeping in. There
was no competition in it at present; the Church-people
had their own grocer and draper; the Dissenters had
theirs; and the two or three butchers found a ready
market for their joints without strict reference to
religious persuasion except that the rector’s
wife had given a general order for the veal sweet-breads
and the mutton kidneys, while Mr. Rodd, the Baptist
minister, had requested that, so far as was compatible
with the fair accommodation of other customers, the
sheep’s trotters might be reserved for him.
And it was likely to be a growing place, for the
trustees of Mr. Zephaniah Crypt’s Charity, under
the stimulus of a late visitation by commissioners,
were beginning to apply long-accumulating funds to
the rebuilding of the Yellow Coat School, which was
henceforth to be carried forward on a greatly-extended
scale, the testator having left no restrictions concerning
the curriculum, but only concerning the coat.
The shopkeepers at Grimworth were
by no means unanimous as to the advantages promised
by this prospect of increased population and trading,
being substantial men, who liked doing a quiet business
in which they were sure of their customers, and could
calculate their returns to a nicety. Hitherto,
it had been held a point of honour by the families
in Grimworth parish, to buy their sugar and their
flannel at the shop where their fathers and mothers
had bought before them; but, if newcomers were to
bring in the system of neck-and-neck trading, and solicit
feminine eyes by gown-pieces laid in fan-like folds,
and surmounted by artificial flowers, giving them
a factitious charm (for on what human figure would
a gown sit like a fan, or what female head was like
a bunch of China-asters?), or, if new grocers were
to fill their windows with mountains of currants and
sugar, made seductive by contrast and tickets, what
security was there for Grimworth, that a vagrant spirit
in shopping, once introduced, would not in the end
carry the most important families to the larger market
town of Cattleton, where, business being done on a
system of small profits and quick returns, the fashions
were of the freshest, and goods of all kinds might
be bought at an advantage?
With this view of the times predominant
among the tradespeople at Grimworth, their uncertainty
concerning the nature of the business which the sallow-complexioned
stranger was about to set up in the vacant shop, naturally
gave some additional strength to the fears of the less
sanguine. If he was going to sell drapery, it
was probable that a pale-faced fellow like that would
deal in showy and inferior articles printed
cottons and muslins which would leave their dye in
the wash-tub, jobbed linen full of knots, and flannel
that would soon look like gauze. If grocery,
then it was to be hoped that no mother of a family
would trust the teas of an untried grocer. Such
things had been known in some parishes as tradesmen
going about canvassing for custom with cards in their
pockets: when people came from nobody knew where,
there was no knowing what they might do. It
was a thousand pities that Mr. Moffat, the auctioneer
and broker, had died without leaving anybody to follow
him in the business, and Mrs. Cleve’s trustee
ought to have known better than to let a shop to a
stranger. Even the discovery that ovens were
being put up on the premises, and that the shop was,
in fact, being fitted up for a confectioner and pastry-cook’s
business, hitherto unknown in Grimworth, did not quite
suffice to turn the scale in the newcomer’s
favour, though the landlady at the Woolpack defended
him warmly, said he seemed to be a very clever young
man, and from what she could make out, came of a very
good family; indeed, was most likely a good many people’s
betters.
It certainly made a blaze of light
and colour, almost as if a rainbow had suddenly descended
into the market-place, when, one fine morning, the
shutters were taken down from the new shop, and the
two windows displayed their decorations. On
one side, there were the variegated tints of collared
and marbled meats, set off by bright green leaves,
the pale brown of glazed pies, the rich tones of sauces
and bottled fruits enclosed in their veil of glass altogether
a sight to bring tears into the eyes of a Dutch painter;
and on the other, there was a predominance of the
more delicate hues of pink, and white, and yellow,
and buff, in the abundant lozenges, candies, sweet
biscuits and icings, which to the eyes of a bilious
person might easily have been blended into a faery
landscape in Turner’s latest style. What
a sight to dawn upon the eyes of Grimworth children!
They almost forgot to go to their dinner that day,
their appetites being preoccupied with imaginary sugar-plums;
and I think even Punch, setting up his tabernacle
in the market-place, would not have succeeded in drawing
them away from those shop-windows, where they stood
according to gradations of size and strength, the biggest
and strongest being nearest the window, and the little
ones in the outermost rows lifting wide-open eyes
and mouths towards the upper tier of jars, like small
birds at meal-time.
The elder inhabitants pished and pshawed
a little at the folly of the new shopkeeper in venturing
on such an outlay in goods that would not keep; to
be sure, Christmas was coming, but what housewife in
Grimworth would not think shame to furnish forth her
table with articles that were not home-cooked?
No, no. Mr. Edward Freely, as he called himself,
was deceived, if he thought Grimworth money was to
flow into his pockets on such terms.
Edward Freely was the name that shone
in gilt letters on a mazarine ground over the doorplace
of the new shop a generous-sounding name,
that might have belonged to the open-hearted, improvident
hero of an old comedy, who would have delighted in
raining sugared almonds, like a new manna-gift, among
that small generation outside the windows. But
Mr. Edward Freely was a man whose impulses were kept
in due subordination: he held that the desire
for sweets and pastry must only be satisfied in a
direct ratio with the power of paying for them.
If the smallest child in Grimworth would go to him
with a halfpenny in its tiny fist, he would, after
ringing the halfpenny, deliver a just equivalent in
“rock.” He was not a man to cheat
even the smallest child he often said so,
observing at the same time that he loved honesty,
and also that he was very tender-hearted, though
he didn’t show his feelings as some people did.
Either in reward of such virtue, or
according to some more hidden law of sequence, Mr.
Freely’s business, in spite of prejudice, started
under favourable auspices. For Mrs. Chaloner,
the rector’s wife, was among the earliest customers
at the shop, thinking it only right to encourage a
new parishioner who had made a decorous appearance
at church; and she found Mr. Freely a most civil,
obliging young man, and intelligent to a surprising
degree for a confectioner; well-principled, too, for
in giving her useful hints about choosing sugars he
had thrown much light on the dishonesty of other tradesmen.
Moreover, he had been in the West Indies, and had
seen the very estate which had been her poor grandfather’s
property; and he said the missionaries were the only
cause of the negro’s discontent an
observing young man, evidently. Mrs. Chaloner
ordered wine-biscuits and olives, and gave Mr. Freely
to understand that she should find his shop a great
convenience. So did the doctor’s wife,
and so did Mrs. Gate, at the large carding-mill, who,
having high connexions frequently visiting her, might
be expected to have a large consumption of ratafias
and macaroons.
The less aristocratic matrons of Grimworth
seemed likely at first to justify their husbands’
confidence that they would never pay a percentage
of profits on drop-cakes, instead of making their own,
or get up a hollow show of liberal housekeeping by
purchasing slices of collared meat when a neighbour
came in for supper. But it is my task to narrate
the gradual corruption of Grimworth manners from their
primitive simplicity a melancholy task,
if it were not cheered by the prospect of the fine
peripateia or downfall by which the progress of the
corruption was ultimately checked.
It was young Mrs. Steene, the veterinary
surgeons wife, who first gave way to temptation.
I fear she had been rather over-educated for her
station in life, for she knew by heart many passages
in Lalla Rookh, the Corsair, and the
Siege of Corinth, which had given her a distaste
for domestic occupations, and caused her a withering
disappointment at the discovery that Mr. Steene, since
his marriage, had lost all interest in the “bulbul,”
openly preferred discussing the nature of spavin with
a coarse neighbour, and was angry if the pudding turned
out watery indeed, was simply a top-booted
“vet.”, who came in hungry at dinner-time;
and not in the least like a nobleman turned Corsair
out of pure scorn for his race, or like a renegade
with a turban and crescent, unless it were in the
irritability of his temper. And scorn is such
a very different thing in top-boots!
This brutal man had invited a supper-party
for Christmas eve, when he would expect to see mince-pies
on the table. Mrs. Steene had prepared her mince-meat,
and had devoted much butter, fine flour, and labour,
to the making of a batch of pies in the morning; but
they proved to be so very heavy when they came out
of the oven, that she could only think with trembling
of the moment when her husband should catch sight of
them on the supper-table. He would storm at
her, she was certain; and before all the company;
and then she should never help crying: it was
so dreadful to think she had come to that, after the
bulbul and everything! Suddenly the thought
darted through her mind that this once she might
send for a dish of mince-pies from Freely’s:
she knew he had some. But what was to become
of the eighteen heavy mince-pies? Oh, it was
of no use thinking about that; it was very expensive indeed,
making mince-pies at all was a great expense, when
they were not sure to turn out well: it would
be much better to buy them ready-made. You paid
a little more for them, but there was no risk of waste.
Such was the sophistry with which
this misguided young woman enough.
Mrs. Steene sent for the mince-pies, and, I am grieved
to add, garbled her household accounts in order to
conceal the fact from her husband. This was the
second step in a downward course, all owing to a young
woman’s being out of harmony with her circumstances,
yearning after renegades and bulbuls, and being subject
to claims from a veterinary surgeon fond of mince-pies.
The third step was to harden herself by telling the
fact of the bought mince-pies to her intimate friend
Mrs. Mole, who had already guessed it, and who subsequently
encouraged herself in buying a mould of jelly, instead
of exerting her own skill, by the reflection that
“other people” did the same sort of thing.
The infection spread; soon there was a party or clique
in Grimworth on the side of “buying at Freely’s”;
and many husbands, kept for some time in the dark
on this point, innocently swallowed at two mouthfuls
a tart on which they were paying a profit of a hundred
per cent., and as innocently encouraged a fatal disingenuousness
in the partners of their bosoms by praising the pastry.
Others, more keen-sighted, winked at the too frequent
presentation on washing-days, and at impromptu suppers,
of superior spiced-beef, which flattered their palates
more than the cold remnants they had formerly been
contented with. Every housewife who had once
“bought at Freely’s” felt a secret
joy when she detected a similar perversion in her
neighbour’s practice, and soon only two or three
old-fashioned mistresses of families held out in
the protest against the growing demoralization, saying
to their neighbours who came to sup with them, “I
can’t offer you Freely’s beef, or Freely’s
cheesecakes; everything in our house is home-made;
I’m afraid you’ll hardly have any appetite
for our plain pastry.” The doctor, whose
cook was not satisfactory, the curate, who kept no
cook, and the mining agent, who was a great bon
vivant, even began to rely on Freely for the greater
part of their dinner, when they wished to give an
entertainment of some brilliancy. In short,
the business of manufacturing the more fanciful viands
was fast passing out of the hinds of maids and matrons
in private families, and was becoming the work of
a special commercial organ.
I am not ignorant that this sort of
thing is called the inevitable course of civilization,
division of labour, and so forth, and that the maids
and matrons may be said to have had their hands set
free from cookery to add to the wealth of society
in some other way. Only it happened at Grimworth,
which, to be sure, was a low place, that the maids
and matrons could do nothing with their hands at all
better than cooking: not even those who had always
made heavy cakes and leathery pastry. And so
it came to pass, that the progress of civilization
at Grimworth was not otherwise apparent than in the
impoverishment of men, the gossiping idleness of women,
and the heightening prosperity of Mr. Edward Freely.
The Yellow Coat School was a double
source of profit to the calculating confectioner;
for he opened an eating-room for the superior workmen
employed on the new school, and he accommodated the
pupils at the old school by giving great attention
to the fancy-sugar department. When I think
of the sweet-tasted swans and other ingenious white
shapes crunched by the small teeth of that rising
generation, I am glad to remember that a certain amount
of calcareous food has been held good for young creatures
whose bones are not quite formed; for I have observed
these delicacies to have an inorganic flavour which
would have recommended them greatly to that young
lady of the Spectator’s acquaintance who
habitually made her dessert on the stems of tobacco-pipes.
As for the confectioner himself, he
made his way gradually into Grimworth homes, as his
commodities did, in spite of some initial repugnance.
Somehow or other, his reception as a guest seemed a
thing that required justifying, like the purchasing
of his pastry. In the first place, he was a
stranger, and therefore open to suspicion; secondly,
the confectionery business was so entirely new at
Grimworth, that its place in the scale of rank had
not been distinctly ascertained. There was no
doubt about drapers and grocers, when they came of
good old Grimworth families, like Mr. Luff and Mr.
Prettyman: they visited with the Palfreys, who
farmed their own land, played many a game at whist
with the doctor, and condescended a little towards
the timber-merchant, who had lately taken to the coal-trade
also, and had got new furniture; but whether a confectioner
should be admitted to this higher level of respectability,
or should be understood to find his associates among
butchers and bakers, was a new question on which tradition
threw no light. His being a bachelor was in
his favour, and would perhaps have been enough to
turn the scale, even if Mr. Edward Freely’s other
personal pretensions had been of an entirely insignificant
cast. But so far from this, it very soon appeared
that he was a remarkable young man, who had been in
the West Indies, and had seen many wonders by sea and
land, so that he could charm the ears of Grimworth
Desdemonas with stories of strange fishes, especially
sharks, which he had stabbed in the nick of time by
bravely plunging overboard just as the monster was
turning on his side to devour the cook’s mate;
of terrible fevers which he had undergone in a land
where the wind blows from all quarters at once; of
rounds of toast cut straight from the breadfruit trees;
of toes bitten off by land-crabs; of large honours
that had been offered to him as a man who knew what
was what, and was therefore particularly needed in
a tropical climate; and of a Creole heiress who had
wept bitterly at his departure. Such conversational
talents as these, we know, will overcome disadvantages
of complexion; and young Towers, whose cheeks were
of the finest pink, set off by a fringe of dark whisker,
was quite eclipsed by the presence of the sallow Mr.
Freely. So exceptional a confectioner elevated
the business, and might well begin to make disengaged
hearts flutter a little.
Fathers and mothers were naturally
more slow and cautious in their recognition of the
newcomer’s merits.
“He’s an amusing fellow,”
said Mr. Prettyman, the highly respectable grocer.
(Mrs. Prettyman was a Miss Fothergill, and her sister
had married a London mercer.) “He’s an
amusing fellow; and I’ve no objection to his
making one at the Oyster Club; but he’s a bit
too fond of riding the high horse. He’s
uncommonly knowing, I’ll allow; but how came
he to go to the Indies? I should like that answered.
It’s unnatural in a confectioner. I’m
not fond of people that have been beyond seas, if they
can’t give a good account how they happened to
go. When folks go so far off, it’s because
they’ve got little credit nearer home that’s
my opinion. However, he’s got some good
rum; but I don’t want to be hand and glove with
him, for all that.”
It was this kind of dim suspicion
which beclouded the view of Mr. Freely’s qualities
in the maturer minds of Grimworth through the early
months of his residence there. But when the confectioner
ceased to be a novelty, the suspicions also ceased
to be novel, and people got tired of hinting at them,
especially as they seemed to be refuted by his advancing
prosperity and importance. Mr. Freely was becoming
a person of influence in the parish; he was found
useful as an overseer of the poor, having great firmness
in enduring other people’s pain, which firmness,
he said, was due to his great benevolence; he always
did what was good for people in the end. Mr.
Chaloner had even selected him as clergyman’s
churchwarden, for he was a very handy man, and much
more of Mr. Chaloner’s opinion in everything
about church business than the older parishioners.
Mr. Freely was a very regular churchman, but at the
Oyster Club he was sometimes a little free in his
conversation, more than hinting at a life of Sultanic
self-indulgence which he had passed in the West Indies,
shaking his head now and then and smiling rather bitterly,
as men are wont to do when they intimate that they
have become a little too wise to be instructed about
a world which has long been flat and stale to them.
For some time he was quite general
in his attentions to the fair sex, combining the gallantries
of a lady’s man with a severity of criticism
on the person and manners of absent belles, which
tended rather to stimulate in the feminine breast
the desire to conquer the approval of so fastidious
a judge. Nothing short of the very best in the
department of female charms and virtues could suffice
to kindle the ardour of Mr. Edward Freely, who had
become familiar with the most luxuriant and dazzling
beauty in the West Indies. It may seem incredible
that a confectioner should have ideas and conversation
so much resembling those to be met with in a higher
walk of life, but it must be remembered that he had
not merely travelled, he had also bow-legs and a sallow,
small-featured visage, so that nature herself had
stamped him for a fastidious connoisseur of the fair
sex.
At last, however, it seemed clear
that Cupid had found a sharper arrow than usual, and
that Mr. Freely’s heart was pierced. It
was the general talk among the young people at Grimworth.
But was it really love, and not rather ambition?
Miss Fullilove, the timber-merchant’s daughter,
was quite sure that if she were Miss Penny
Palfrey, she would be cautious; it was not a good
sign when men looked so much above themselves for a
wife. For it was no less a person than Miss Penelope
Palfrey, second daughter of the Mr. Palfrey who farmed
his own land, that had attracted Mr. Freely’s
peculiar regard, and conquered his fastidiousness;
and no wonder, for the Ideal, as exhibited in the
finest waxwork, was perhaps never so closely approached
by the Real as in the person of the pretty Penelope.
Her yellowish flaxen hair did not curl naturally,
I admit, but its bright crisp ringlets were such smooth,
perfect miniature tubes, that you would have longed
to pass your little finger through them, and feel
their soft elasticity. She wore them in a crop,
for in those days, when society was in a healthier
state, young ladies wore crops long after they were
twenty, and Penelope was not yet nineteen. Like
the waxen ideal, she had round blue eyes, and round
nostrils in her little nose, and teeth such as the
ideal would be seen to have, if it ever showed them.
Altogether, she was a small, round thing, as neat as
a pink and white double daisy, and as guileless; for
I hope it does not argue guile in a pretty damsel
of nineteen, to think that she should like to have
a beau and be “engaged,” when her elder
sister had already been in that position a year and
a half. To be sure, there was young Towers always
coming to the house; but Penny felt convinced he only
came to see her brother, for he never had anything
to say to her, and never offered her his arm, and
was as awkward and silent as possible.
It is not unlikely that Mr. Freely
had early been smitten by Penny’s charms, as
brought under his observation at church, but he had
to make his way in society a little before he could
come into nearer contact with them; and even after
he was well received in Grimworth families, it was
a long while before he could converse with Penny otherwise
than in an incidental meeting at Mr. Luff’s.
It was not so easy to get invited to Long Meadows,
the residence of the Palfreys; for though Mr. Palfrey
had been losing money of late years, not being able
quite to recover his feet after the terrible murrain
which forced him to borrow, his family were far from
considering themselves on the same level even as the
old-established tradespeople with whom they visited.
The greatest people, even kings and queens, must
visit with somebody, and the equals of the great are
scarce. They were especially scarce at Grimworth,
which, as I have before observed, was a low parish,
mentioned with the most scornful brevity in gazetteers.
Even the great people there were far behind those
of their own standing in other parts of this realm.
Mr. Palfrey’s farmyard doors had the paint
all worn off them, and the front garden walks had
long been merged in a general weediness. Still,
his father had been called Squire Palfrey, and had
been respected by the last Grimworth generation as
a man who could afford to drink too much in his own
house.
Pretty Penny was not blind to the
fact that Mr. Freely admired her, and she felt sure
that it was he who had sent her a beautiful valentine;
but her sister seemed to think so lightly of him (all
young ladies think lightly of the gentlemen to whom
they are not engaged), that Penny never dared mention
him, and trembled and blushed whenever they met him,
thinking of the valentine, which was very strong in
its expressions, and which she felt guilty of knowing
by heart. A man who had been to the Indies,
and knew the sea so well, seemed to her a sort of public
character, almost like Robinson Crusoe or Captain Cook;
and Penny had always wished her husband to be a remarkable
personage, likely to be put in Mangnall’s Questions,
with which register of the immortals she had become
acquainted during her one year at a boarding-school.
Only it seemed strange that a remarkable man should
be a confectioner and pastry-cook, and this anomaly
quite disturbed Penny’s dreams. Her brothers,
she knew, laughed at men who couldn’t sit on
horseback well, and called them tailors; but her brothers
were very rough, and were quite without that power
of anecdote which made Mr. Freely such a delightful
companion. He was a very good man, she thought,
for she had heard him say at Mr. Luff’s, one
day, that he always wished to do his duty in whatever
state of life he might be placed; and he knew a great
deal of poetry, for one day he had repeated a verse
of a song. She wondered if he had made the words
of the valentine! it ended in this way:
“Without thee, it is pain
to live,
But with thee, it were sweet to
die.”
Poor Mr. Freely! her father would
very likely object she felt sure he would,
for he always called Mr. Freely “that sugar-plum
fellow.” Oh, it was very cruel, when true
love was crossed in that way, and all because Mr.
Freely was a confectioner: well, Penny would be
true to him, for all that, and since his being a confectioner
gave her an opportunity of showing her faithfulness,
she was glad of it. Edward Freely was a pretty
name, much better than John Towers. Young Towers
had offered her a rose out of his button-hole the
other day, blushing very much; but she refused it,
and thought with delight how much Mr. Freely would
be comforted if he knew her firmness of mind.
Poor little Penny! the days were so
very long among the daisies on a grazing farm, and
thought is so active how was it possible
that the inward drama should not get the start of
the outward? I have known young ladies, much
better educated, and with an outward world diversified
by instructive lectures, to say nothing of literature
and highly-developed fancy-work, who have spun a cocoon
of visionary joys and sorrows for themselves, just
as Penny did. Her elder sister Letitia, who had
a prouder style of beauty, and a more worldly ambition,
was engaged to a wool-factor, who came all the way
from Cattelton to see her; and everybody knows that
a wool-factor takes a very high rank, sometimes driving
a double-bodied gig. Letty’s notions got
higher every day, and Penny never dared to speak of
her cherished griefs to her lofty sister never
dared to propose that they should call at Mr. Freely’s
to buy liquorice, though she had prepared for such
an incident by mentioning a slight sore throat.
So she had to pass the shop on the other side of
the market-place, and reflect, with a suppressed sigh,
that behind those pink and white jars somebody was
thinking of her tenderly, unconscious of the small
space that divided her from him.
And it was quite true that, when business
permitted, Mr. Freely thought a great deal of Penny.
He thought her prettiness comparable to the loveliest
things in confectionery; he judged her to be of submissive
temper likely to wait upon him as well as
if she had been a negress, and to be silently terrified
when his liver made him irritable; and he considered
the Palfrey family quite the best in the parish, possessing
marriageable daughters. On the whole, he thought
her worthy to become Mrs. Edward Freely, and all the
more so, because it would probably require some ingenuity
to win her. Mr. Palfrey was capable of horse-whipping
a too rash pretender to his daughter’s hand;
and, moreover, he had three tall sons: it was
clear that a suitor would be at a disadvantage with
such a family, unless travel and natural acumen had
given him a countervailing power of contrivance.
And the first idea that occurred to him in the matter
was, that Mr. Palfrey would object less if he knew
that the Freelys were a much higher family than his
own. It had been foolish modesty in him hitherto
to conceal the fact that a branch of the Freelys held
a manor in Yorkshire, and to shut up the portrait of
his great uncle the admiral, instead of hanging it
up where a family portrait should be hung over
the mantelpiece in the parlour. Admiral Freely,
K.C.B., once placed in this conspicuous position, was
seen to have had one arm only, and one eye in
these points resembling the heroic Nelson while
a certain pallid insignificance of feature confirmed
the relationship between himself and his grand-nephew.
Next, Mr. Freely was seized with an
irrepressible ambition to posses Mrs. Palfrey’s
receipt for brawn, hers being pronounced on all hands
to be superior to his own as he informed
her in a very flattering letter carried by his errand-boy.
Now Mrs. Palfrey, like other geniuses, wrought by
instinct rather than by rule, and possessed no receipts indeed,
despised all people who used them, observing that
people who pickled by book, must pickle by weights
and measures, and such nonsense; as for herself, her
weights and measures were the tip of her finger and
the tip of her tongue, and if you went nearer, why,
of course, for dry goods like flour and spice, you
went by handfuls and pinches, and for wet, there was
a middle-sized jug quite the best thing
whether for much or little, because you might know
how much a teacupful was if you’d got any use
of your senses, and you might be sure it would take
five middle-sized jugs to make a gallon. Knowledge
of this kind is like Titian’s colouring, difficult
to communicate; and as Mrs. Palfrey, once remarkably
handsome, had now become rather stout and asthmatical,
and scarcely ever left home, her oral teaching could
hardly be given anywhere except at Long Meadows.
Even a matron is not insusceptible to flattery, and
the prospect of a visitor whose great object would
be to listen to her conversation, was not without
its charms to Mrs. Palfrey. Since there was
no receipt to be sent in reply to Mr. Freely’s
humble request, she called on her more docile daughter,
Penny, to write a note, telling him that her mother
would be glad to see him and talk with him on brawn,
any day that he could call at Long Meadows. Penny
obeyed with a trembling hand, thinking how wonderfully
things came about in this world.
In this way, Mr. Freely got himself
introduced into the home of the Palfreys, and notwithstanding
a tendency in the male part of the family to jeer
at him a little as “peaky” and bow-legged,
he presently established his position as an accepted
and frequent guest. Young Towers looked at him
with increasing disgust when they met at the house
on a Sunday, and secretly longed to try his ferret
upon him, as a piece of vermin which that valuable
animal would be likely to tackle with unhesitating
vigour. But so blind sometimes are
parents neither Mr. nor Mrs. Palfrey suspected
that Penny would have anything to say to a tradesman
of questionable rank whose youthful bloom was much
withered. Young Towers, they thought, had an
eye to her, and that was likely enough to be
a match some day; but Penny was a child at present.
And all the while Penny was imagining the circumstances
under which Mr. Freely would make her an offer:
perhaps down by the row of damson-trees, when they
were in the garden before tea; perhaps by letter in
which case, how would the letter begin? “Dearest
Penelope?” or “My dear Miss Penelope?”
or straight off, without dear anything, as seemed the
most natural when people were embarrassed? But,
however he might make the offer, she would not accept
it without her father’s consent: she would
always be true to Mr. Freely, but she would not disobey
her father. For Penny was a good girl, though
some of her female friends were afterwards of opinion
that it spoke ill for her not to have felt an instinctive
repugnance to Mr. Freely.
But he was cautious, and wished to
be quite sure of the ground he trod on. His
views on marriage were not entirely sentimental, but
were as duly mingled with considerations of what would
be advantageous to a man in his position, as if he
had had a very large amount of money spent on his
education. He was not a man to fall in love in
the wrong place; and so, he applied himself quite
as much to conciliate the favour of the parents, as
to secure the attachment of Penny. Mrs. Palfrey
had not been inaccessible to flattery, and her husband,
being also of mortal mould, would not, it might be
hoped, be proof against rum that very fine
Jamaica rum of which Mr. Freely expected
always to have a supply sent him from Jamaica.
It was not easy to get Mr. Palfrey into the parlour
behind the shop, where a mild back-street light fell
on the features of the heroic admiral; but by getting
hold of him rather late one evening as he was about
to return home from Grimworth, the aspiring lover succeeded
in persuading him to sup on some collared beef which,
after Mrs. Palfrey’s brawn, he would find the
very best of cold eating.
From that hour Mr. Freely felt sure
of success: being in privacy with an estimable
man old enough to be his father, and being rather lonely
in the world, it was natural he should unbosom himself
a little on subjects which he could not speak of in
a mixed circle especially concerning his
expectations from his uncle in Jamaica, who had no
children, and loved his nephew Edward better than
any one else in the world, though he had been so hurt
at his leaving Jamaica, that he had threatened to cut
him off with a shilling. However, he had since
written to state his full forgiveness, and though
he was an eccentric old gentleman and could not bear
to give away money during his life, Mr. Edward Freely
could show Mr. Palfrey the letter which declared,
plainly enough, who would be the affectionate uncle’s
heir. Mr. Palfrey actually saw the letter, and
could not help admiring the spirit of the nephew who
declared that such brilliant hopes as these made no
difference to his conduct; he should work at his humble
business and make his modest fortune at it all the
same. If the Jamaica estate was to come to him well
and good. It was nothing very surprising for
one of the Freely family to have an estate left him,
considering the lands that family had possessed in
time gone by nay, still possessed in the
Northumberland branch. Would not Mr. Palfrey
take another glass of rum? and also look at the last
year’s balance of the accounts? Mr. Freely
was a man who cared to possess personal virtues, and
did not pique himself on his family, though some men
would.
We know how easily the great Leviathan
may be led, when once there is a hook in his nose
or a bridle in his jaws. Mr. Palfrey was a large
man, but, like Leviathan’s, his bulk went against
him when once he had taken a turning. He was
not a mercurial man, who easily changed his point of
view. Enough. Before two months were over,
he had given his consent to Mr. Freely’s marriage
with his daughter Penny, and having hit on a formula
by which he could justify it, fenced off all doubts
and objections, his own included. The formula
was this: “I’m not a man to put my
head up an entry before I know where it leads.”
Little Penny was very proud and fluttering,
but hardly so happy as she expected to be in an engagement.
She wondered if young Towers cared much about it,
for he had not been to the house lately, and her sister
and brothers were rather inclined to sneer than to
sympathize. Grimworth rang with the news.
All men extolled Mr. Freely’s good fortune;
while the women, with the tender solicitude characteristic
of the sex, wished the marriage might turn out well.
While affairs were at this triumphant
juncture, Mr. Freely one morning observed that a stone-carver
who had been breakfasting in the eating-room had left
a newspaper behind. It was the X-shire Gazette,
and X-shire being a county not unknown to Mr. Freely,
he felt some curiosity to glance over it, and especially
over the advertisements. A slight flush came
over his face as he read. It was produced by
the following announcement: “If David
Faux, son of Jonathan Faux, late of Gilsbrook, will
apply at the office of Mr. Strutt, attorney, of Rodham,
he will hear of something to his advantage.”
“Father’s dead!”
exclaimed Mr. Freely, involuntarily. “Can
he have left me a legacy?”
CHAPTER III
Perhaps it was a result quite different
from your expectations, that Mr. David Faux should
have returned from the West Indies only a few years
after his arrival there, and have set up in his old
business, like any plain man who has never travelled.
But these cases do occur in life. Since, as
we know, men change their skies and see new constellations
without changing their souls, it will follow sometimes
that they don’t change their business under
those novel circumstances.
Certainly, this result was contrary
to David’s own expectations. He had looked
forward, you are aware, to a brilliant career among
“the blacks”; but, either because they
had already seen too many white men, or for some other
reason, they did not at once recognize him as a superior
order of human being; besides, there were no princesses
among them. Nobody in Jamaica was anxious to
maintain David for the mere pleasure of his society;
and those hidden merits of a man which are so well
known to himself were as little recognized there as
they notoriously are in the effete society of the
Old World. So that in the dark hints that David
threw out at the Oyster Club about that life of Sultanic
self-indulgence spent by him in the luxurious Indies,
I really think he was doing himself a wrong; I believe
he worked for his bread, and, in fact, took to cooking
as, after all, the only department in which he could
offer skilled labour. He had formed several
ingenious plans by which he meant to circumvent people
of large fortune and small faculty; but then he never
met with exactly the right circumstances. David’s
devices for getting rich without work had apparently
no direct relation with the world outside him, as
his confectionery receipts had. It is possible
to pass a great many bad half pennies and bad half-crowns,
but I believe there has no instance been known of
passing a halfpenny or a half-crown as a sovereign.
A sharper can drive a brisk trade in this world:
it is undeniable that there may be a fine career for
him, if he will dare consequences; but David was too
timid to be a sharper, or venture in any way among
the mantraps of the law. He dared rob nobody
but his mother. And so he had to fall back on
the genuine value there was in him to be
content to pass as a good halfpenny, or, to speak more
accurately, as a good confectioner. For in spite
of some additional reading and observation, there
was nothing else he could make so much money by; nay,
he found in himself even a capability of extending
his skill in this direction, and embracing all forms
of cookery; while, in other branches of human labour,
he began to see that it was not possible for him to
shine. Fate was too strong for him; he had thought
to master her inclination and had fled over the seas
to that end; but she caught him, tied an apron round
him, and snatching him from all other devices, made
him devise cakes and patties in a kitchen at Kingstown.
He was getting submissive to her, since she paid
him with tolerable gains; but fevers and prickly heat,
and other evils incidental to cooks in ardent climates,
made him long for his native land; so he took ship
once more, carrying his six years’ savings,
and seeing distinctly, this time, what were Fate’s
intentions as to his career. If you question
me closely as to whether all the money with which
he set up at Grimworth consisted of pure and simple
earnings, I am obliged to confess that he got a sum
or two for charitably abstaining from mentioning some
other people’s misdemeanours. Altogether,
since no prospects were attached to his family name,
and since a new christening seemed a suitable commencement
of a new life, Mr. David Faux thought it as well to
call himself Mr. Edward Freely.
But lo! now, in opposition to all
calculable probability, some benefit appeared to be
attached to the name of David Faux. Should he
neglect it, as beneath the attention of a prosperous
tradesman? It might bring him into contact with
his family again, and he felt no yearnings in that
direction: moreover, he had small belief that
the “something to his advantage” could
be anything considerable. On the other hand,
even a small gain is pleasant, and the promise of
it in this instance was so surprising, that David
felt his curiosity awakened. The scale dipped
at last on the side of writing to the lawyer, and,
to be brief, the correspondence ended in an appointment
for a meeting between David and his eldest brother
at Mr. Strutt’s, the vague “something”
having been defined as a legacy from his father of
eighty-two pounds, three shillings.
David, you know, had expected to be
disinherited; and so he would have been, if he had
not, like some other indifferent sons, come of excellent
parents, whose conscience made them scrupulous where
much more highly-instructed people often feel themselves
warranted in following the bent of their indignation.
Good Mrs. Faux could never forget that she had brought
this ill-conditioned son into the world when he was
in that entirely helpless state which excluded the
smallest choice on his part; and, somehow or other,
she felt that his going wrong would be his father’s
and mother’s fault, if they failed in one tittle
of their parental duty. Her notion of parental
duty was not of a high and subtle kind, but it included
giving him his due share of the family property; for
when a man had got a little honest money of his own,
was he so likely to steal? To cut the delinquent
son off with a shilling, was like delivering him over
to his evil propensities. No; let the sum of
twenty guineas which he had stolen be deducted from
his share, and then let the sum of three guineas be
put back from it, seeing that his mother had always
considered three of the twenty guineas as his; and,
though he had run away, and was, perhaps, gone across
the sea, let the money be left to him all the same,
and be kept in reserve for his possible return.
Mr. Faux agreed to his wife’s views, and made
a codicil to his will accordingly, in time to die
with a clear conscience. But for some time his
family thought it likely that David would never reappear;
and the eldest son, who had the charge of Jacob on
his hands, often thought it a little hard that David
might perhaps be dead, and yet, for want of certitude
on that point, his legacy could not fall to his legal
heir. But in this state of things the opposite
certitude namely, that David was still
alive and in England seemed to be brought
by the testimony of a neighbour, who, having been
on a journey to Cattelton, was pretty sure he had
seen David in a gig, with a stout man driving by his
side. He could “swear it was David,”
though he could “give no account why, for he
had no marks on him; but no more had a white dog,
and that didn’t hinder folks from knowing a
white dog.” It was this incident which
had led to the advertisement.
The legacy was paid, of course, after
a few preliminary disclosures as to Mr. David’s
actual position. He begged to send his love to
his mother, and to say that he hoped to pay her a
dutiful visit by and by; but, at present, his business
and near prospect of marriage made it difficult for
him to leave home. His brother replied with much
frankness.
“My mother may do as she likes
about having you to see her, but, for my part, I don’t
want to catch sight of you on the premises again.
When folks have taken a new name, they’d better
keep to their new ’quinetance.”
David pocketed the insult along with
the eighty-two pounds three, and travelled home again
in some triumph at the ease of a transaction which
had enriched him to this extent. He had no intention
of offending his brother by further claims on his
fraternal recognition, and relapsed with full contentment
into the character of Mr. Edward Freely, the orphan,
scion of a great but reduced family, with an eccentric
uncle in the West Indies. (I have already hinted
that he had some acquaintance with imaginative literature;
and being of a practical turn, he had, you perceive,
applied even this form of knowledge to practical purposes.)
It was little more than a week after
the return from his fruitful journey, that the day
of his marriage with Penny having been fixed, it was
agreed that Mrs. Palfrey should overcome her reluctance
to move from home, and that she and her husband should
bring their two daughters to inspect little Penny’s
future abode and decide on the new arrangements to
be made for the reception of the bride. Mr. Freely
meant her to have a house so pretty and comfortable
that she need not envy even a wool-factor’s
wife. Of course, the upper room over the shop
was to be the best sitting-room; but also the parlour
behind the shop was to be made a suitable bower for
the lovely Penny, who would naturally wish to be near
her husband, though Mr. Freely declared his resolution
never to allow his wife to wait in the shop.
The decisions about the parlour furniture were left
till last, because the party was to take tea there;
and, about five o’clock, they were all seated
there with the best muffins and buttered buns before
them, little Penny blushing and smiling, with her
“crop” in the best order, and a blue frock
showing her little white shoulders, while her opinion
was being always asked and never given. She
secretly wished to have a particular sort of chimney
ornaments, but she could not have brought herself
to mention it. Seated by the side of her yellow
and rather withered lover, who, though he had not reached
his thirtieth year, had already crow’s-feet
about his eyes, she was quite tremulous at the greatness
of her lot in being married to a man who had travelled
so much and before her sister Letty!
The handsome Letitia looked rather proud and contemptuous,
thought her nature brother-in-law an odious person,
and was vexed with her father and mother for letting
Penny marry him. Dear little Penny! She
certainly did look like a fresh white-heart cherry
going to be bitten off the stem by that lipless mouth.
Would no deliverer come to make a slip between that
cherry and that mouth without a lip?
“Quite a family likeness between
the admiral and you, Mr. Freely,” observed Mrs.
Palfrey, who was looking at the family portrait for
the first time. “It’s wonderful!
and only a grand-uncle. Do you feature the rest
of your family, as you know of?”
“I can’t say,” said
Mr. Freely, with a sigh. “My family have
mostly thought themselves too high to take any notice
of me.”
At this moment an extraordinary disturbance
was heard in the shop, as of a heavy animal stamping
about and making angry noises, and then of a glass
vessel falling in shivers, while the voice of the apprentice
was heard calling “Master” in great alarm.
Mr. Freely rose in anxious astonishment,
and hastened into the shop, followed by the four Palfreys,
who made a group at the parlour-door, transfixed with
wonder at seeing a large man in a smock-frock, with
a pitchfork in his hand, rush up to Mr. Freely and
hug him, crying out, “Zavy, Zavy,
b’other Zavy!”
It was Jacob, and for some moments
David lost all presence of mind. He felt arrested
for having stolen his mother’s guineas.
He turned cold, and trembled in his brother’s
grasp.
“Why, how’s this?”
said Mr. Palfrey, advancing from the door. “Who
is he?”
Jacob supplied the answer by saying over and over
again
“I’se Zacob, b’other
Zacob. Come ’o zee Zavy” till
hunger prompted him to relax his grasp, and to seize
a large raised pie, which he lifted to his mouth.
By this time David’s power of
device had begun to return, but it was a very hard
task for his prudence to master his rage and hatred
towards poor Jacob.
“I don’t know who he is;
he must be drunk,” he said, in a low tone to
Mr. Palfrey. “But he’s dangerous
with that pitchfork. He’ll never let it
go.” Then checking himself on the point
of betraying too great an intimacy with Jacob’s
habits, he added “You watch him, while I run
for the constable.” And he hurried out
of the shop.
“Why, where do you come from,
my man?” said Mr. Palfrey, speaking to Jacob
in a conciliatory tone. Jacob was eating his
pie by large mouthfuls, and looking round at the other
good things in the shop, while he embraced his pitchfork
with his left arm, and laid his left hand on some
Bath buns. He was in the rare position of a person
who recovers a long absent friend and finds him richer
than ever in the characteristics that won his heart.
“I’s Zacob b’other
Zacob ’t home. I love Zavy b’other
Zavy,” he said, as soon as Mr. Palfrey had drawn
his attention. “Zavy come back from z’
Indies got mother’s zinnies.
Where’s Zavy?” he added, looking round
and then turning to the others with a questioning
air, puzzled by David’s disappearance.
“It’s very odd,”
observed Mr. Palfrey to his wife and daughters.
“He seems to say Freely’s his brother
come back from th’ Indies.”
“What a pleasant relation for
us!” said Letitia, sarcastically. “I
think he’s a good deal like Mr. Freely.
He’s got just the same sort of nose, and his
eyes are the same colour.”
Poor Penny was ready to cry.
But now Mr. Freely re-entered the
shop without the constable. During his walk
of a few yards he had had time and calmness enough
to widen his view of consequences, and he saw that
to get Jacob taken to the workhouse or to the lock-up
house as an offensive stranger might have awkward effects
if his family took the trouble of inquiring after him.
He must resign himself to more patient measures.
“On second thoughts,”
he said, beckoning to Mr. Palfrey and whispering to
him while Jacob’s back was turned, “he’s
a poor half-witted fellow. Perhaps his friends
will come after him. I don’t mind giving
him something to eat, and letting him lie down for
the night. He’s got it into his head that
he knows me they do get these fancies, idiots
do. He’ll perhaps go away again in an hour
or two, and make no more ado. I’m a kind-hearted
man myself I shouldn’t like
to have the poor fellow ill-used.”
“Why, he’ll eat a sovereign’s
worth in no time,” said Mr. Palfrey, thinking
Mr. Freely a little too magnificent in his generosity.
“Eh, Zavy, come back?”
exclaimed Jacob, giving his dear brother another hug,
which crushed Mr. Freely’s features inconveniently
against the stale of the pitchfork.
“Aye, aye,” said Mr. Freely,
smiling, with every capability of murder in his mind,
except the courage to commit it. He wished the
Bath buns might by chance have arsenic in them.
“Mother’s zinnies?”
said Jacob, pointing to a glass jar of yellow lozenges
that stood in the window. “Zive ’em
me.”
David dared not do otherwise than
reach down the glass jar and give Jacob a handful.
He received them in his smock-frock, which he held
out for more.
“They’ll keep him quiet
a bit, at any rate,” thought David, and emptied
the jar. Jacob grinned and mowed with delight.
“You’re very good to this
stranger, Mr. Freely,” said Letitia; and then
spitefully, as David joined the party at the parlour-door,
“I think you could hardly treat him better,
if he was really your brother.”
“I’ve always thought it
a duty to be good to idiots,” said Mr. Freely,
striving after the most moral view of the subject.
“We might have been idiots ourselves everybody
might have been born idiots, instead of having their
right senses.”
“I don’t know where there’d
ha’ been victual for us all then,” observed
Mrs. Palfrey, regarding the matter in a housewifely
light.
“But let us sit down again and
finish our tea,” said Mr. Freely. “Let
us leave the poor creature to himself.”
They walked into the parlour again;
but Jacob, not apparently appreciating the kindness
of leaving him to himself, immediately followed his
brother, and seated himself, pitchfork grounded, at
the table.
“Well,” said Miss Letitia,
rising, “I don’t know whether you
mean to stay, mother; but I shall go home.”
“Oh, me too,” said Penny,
frightened to death at Jacob, who had begun to nod
and grin at her.
“Well, I think we had
better be going, Mr. Palfrey,” said the mother,
rising more slowly.
Mr. Freely, whose complexion had become
decidedly yellower during the last half-hour, did
not resist this proposition. He hoped they should
meet again “under happier circumstances.”
“It’s my belief the man
is his brother,” said Letitia, when they were
all on their way home.
“Nonsense!” said Mr. Palfrey.
“Freely’s got no brother he’s
said so many and many a time; he’s an orphan;
he’s got nothing but uncles leastwise,
one. What’s it matter what an idiot says?
What call had Freely to tell lies?”
Letitia tossed her head and was silent.
Mr. Freely, left alone with his affectionate
brother Jacob, brooded over the possibility of luring
him out of the town early the next morning, and getting
him conveyed to Gilsbrook without further betrayals.
But the thing was difficult. He saw clearly
that if he took Jacob himself, his absence, conjoined
with the disappearance of the stranger, would either
cause the conviction that he was really a relative,
or would oblige him to the dangerous course of inventing
a story to account for his disappearance, and his
own absence at the same time. David groaned.
There come occasions when falsehood is felt to be inconvenient.
It would, perhaps, have been a longer-headed device,
if he had never told any of those clever fibs about
his uncles, grand and otherwise; for the Palfreys
were simple people, and shared the popular prejudice
against lying. Even if he could get Jacob away
this time, what security was there that he would not
come again, having once found the way? O guineas!
O lozenges! what enviable people those were who had
never robbed their mothers, and had never told fibs!
David spent a sleepless night, while Jacob was snoring
close by. Was this the upshot of travelling
to the Indies, and acquiring experience combined with
anecdote?
He rose at break of day, as he had
once before done when he was in fear of Jacob, and
took all gentle means to rouse this fatal brother from
his deep sleep; he dared not be loud, because his
apprentice was in the house, and would report everything.
But Jacob was not to be roused. He fought out
with his fist at the unknown cause of disturbance,
turned over, and snored again. He must be left
to wake as he would. David, with a cold perspiration
on his brow, confessed to himself that Jacob could
not be got away that day.
Mr. Palfrey came over to Grimworth
before noon, with a natural curiosity to see how his
future son-in-law got on with the stranger to whom
he was so benevolently inclined. He found a
crowd round the shop. All Grimworth by this
time had heard how Freely had been fastened on by an
idiot, who called him “Brother Zavy”; and
the younger population seemed to find the singular
stranger an unwearying source of fascination, while
the householders dropped in one by one to inquire into
the incident.
“Why don’t you send him
to the workhouse?” said Mr. Prettyman.
“You’ll have a row with him and the children
presently, and he’ll eat you up. The workhouse
is the proper place for him; let his kin claim him,
if he’s got any.”
“Those may be your feelings,
Mr. Prettyman,” said David, his mind quite enfeebled
by the torture of his position.
“What! is he your brother,
then?” said Mr. Prettyman, looking at his neighbour
Freely rather sharply.
“All men are our brothers, and
idiots particular so,” said Mr. Freely, who,
like many other travelled men, was not master of the
English language.
“Come, come, if he’s your
brother, tell the truth, man,” said Mr. Prettyman,
with growing suspicion. “Don’t be
ashamed of your own flesh and blood.”
Mr. Palfrey was present, and also
had his eye on Freely. It is difficult for a
man to believe in the advantage of a truth which will
disclose him to have been a liar. In this critical
moment, David shrank from this immediate disgrace
in the eyes of his future father-in-law.
“Mr. Prettyman,” he said,
“I take your observations as an insult.
I’ve no reason to be otherwise than proud of
my own flesh and blood. If this poor man was
my brother more than all men are, I should say so.”
A tall figure darkened the door, and
David, lifting his eyes in that direction, saw his
eldest brother, Jonathan, on the door-sill.
“I’ll stay wi’ Zavy,”
shouted Jacob, as he, too, caught sight of his eldest
brother; and, running behind the counter, he clutched
David hard.
“What, he is here?”
said Jonathan Faux, coming forward. “My
mother would have no nay, as he’d been away
so long, but I must see after him. And it struck
me he was very like come after you, because we’d
been talking of you o’ late, and where you lived.”
David saw there was no escape; he smiled a ghastly
smile.
“What! is this a relation of yours, sir?”
said Mr. Palfrey to Jonathan.
“Aye, it’s my innicent
of a brother, sure enough,” said honest Jonathan.
“A fine trouble and cost he is to us, in th’
eating and other things, but we must bear what’s
laid on us.”
“And your name’s Freely, is it?”
said Mr. Prettyman.
“Nay, nay, my name’s Faux,
I know nothing o’ Freelys,” said Jonathan,
curtly. “Come,” he added, turning
to David, “I must take some news to mother about
Jacob. Shall I take him with me, or will you
undertake to send him back?”
“Take him, if you can make him loose his hold
of me,” said David, feebly.
“Is this gentleman here in the
confectionery line your brother, then, sir?”
said Mr. Prettyman, feeling that it was an occasion
on which format language must be used.
“I don’t want to
own him,” said Jonathan, unable to resist a movement
of indignation that had never been allowed to satisfy
itself. “He ran away from home with good
reasons in his pocket years ago: he didn’t
want to be owned again, I reckon.”
Mr. Palfrey left the shop; he felt
his own pride too severely wounded by the sense that
he had let himself be fooled, to feel curiosity for
further details. The most pressing business was
to go home and tell his daughter that Freely was a
poor sneak, probably a rascal, and that her engagement
was broken off.
Mr. Prettyman stayed, with some internal
self-gratulation that he had never given in
to Freely, and that Mr. Chaloner would see now what
sort of fellow it was that he had put over the heads
of older parishioners. He considered it due
from him (Mr. Prettyman) that, for the interests of
the parish, he should know all that was to be known
about this “interloper.” Grimworth
would have people coming from Botany Bay to settle
in it, if things went on in this way.
It soon appeared that Jacob could
not be made to quit his dear brother David except
by force. He understood, with a clearness equal
to that of the most intelligent mind, that Jonathan
would take him back to skimmed milk, apple-dumpling,
broad beans, and pork. And he had found a paradise
in his brother’s shop. It was a difficult
matter to use force with Jacob, for he wore heavy
nailed boots; and if his pitchfork had been mastered,
he would have resorted without hesitation to kicks.
Nothing short of using guile to bind him hand and
foot would have made all parties safe.
“Let him stay,” said David,
with desperate resignation, frightened above all things
at the idea of further disturbances in his shop, which
would make his exposure all the more conspicuous.
“You go away again, and to-morrow I
can, perhaps, get him to go to Gilsbrook with me.
He’ll follow me fast enough, I daresay,”
he added, with a half-groan.
“Very well,” said Jonathan,
gruffly. “I don’t see why you
shouldn’t have some trouble and expense with
him as well as the rest of us. But mind you
bring him back safe and soon, else mother’ll
never rest.”
On this arrangement being concluded,
Mr. Prettyman begged Mr. Jonathan Faux to go and take
a snack with him, an invitation which was quite acceptable;
and as honest Jonathan had nothing to be ashamed of,
it is probable that he was very frank in his communications
to the civil draper, who, pursuing the benefit of
the parish, hastened to make all the information he
could gather about Freely common parochial property.
You may imagine that the meeting of the Club at the
Woolpack that evening was unusually lively.
Every member was anxious to prove that he had never
liked Freely, as he called himself. Faux was
his name, was it? Fox would have been more suitable.
The majority expressed a desire to see him hooted
out of the town.
Mr. Freely did not venture over his
door-sill that day, for he knew Jacob would keep at
his side, and there was every probability that they
would have a train of juvenile followers. He
sent to engage the Woolpack gig for an early hour
the next morning; but this order was not kept religiously
a secret by the landlord. Mr. Freely was informed
that he could not have the gig till seven; and the
Grimworth people were early risers. Perhaps
they were more alert than usual on this particular
morning; for when Jacob, with a bag of sweets in his
hand, was induced to mount the gig with his brother
David, the inhabitants of the market-place were looking
out of their doors and windows, and at the turning
of the street there was even a muster of apprentices
and schoolboys, who shouted as they passed in what
Jacob took to be a very merry and friendly way, nodding
and grinning in return. “Huzzay, David
Faux! how’s your uncle?” was their morning’s
greeting. Like other pointed things, it was not
altogether impromptu.
Even this public derision was not
so crushing to David as the horrible thought that
though he might succeed now in getting Jacob home again
there would never be any security against his coming
back, like a wasp to the honey-pot. As long
as David lived at Grimworth, Jacob’s return would
be hanging over him. But could he go on living
at Grimworth an object of ridicule, discarded
by the Palfreys, after having revelled in the consciousness
that he was an envied and prosperous confectioner?
David liked to be envied; he minded less about being
loved.
His doubts on this point were soon
settled. The mind of Grimworth became obstinately
set against him and his viands, and the new school
being finished, the eating-room was closed.
If there had been no other reason, sympathy with the
Palfreys, that respectable family who had lived in
the parish time out of mind, would have determined
all well-to-do people to decline Freely’s goods.
Besides, he had absconded with his mother’s
guineas: who knew what else he had done, in Jamaica
or elsewhere, before he came to Grimworth, worming
himself into families under false pretences?
Females shuddered. Dreadful suspicions gathered
round him: his green eyes, his bow-legs had a
criminal aspect. The rector disliked the sight
of a man who had imposed upon him; and all boys who
could not afford to purchase, hooted “David
Faux” as they passed his shop. Certainly
no man now would pay anything for the “goodwill”
of Mr. Freely’s business, and he would be obliged
to quit it without a peculium so desirable towards
defraying the expense of moving.
In a few months the shop in the market-place
was again to let, and Mr. David Faux, alias Mr. Edward
Freely, had gone nobody at Grimworth knew
whither. In this way the demoralization of Grimworth
women was checked. Young Mrs. Steene renewed
her efforts to make light mince-pies, and having at
last made a batch so excellent that Mr. Steene looked
at her with complacency as he ate them, and said they
were the best he had ever eaten in his life, she thought
less of bulbuls and renegades ever after. The
secrets of the finer cookery were revived in the breasts
of matronly house-wives, and daughters were again
anxious to be initiated in them.
You will further, I hope, be glad
to bear, that some purchases of drapery made by pretty
Penny, in preparation for her marriage with Mr. Freely,
came in quite as well for her wedding with young Towers
as if they had been made expressly for the latter
occasion. For Penny’s complexion had not
altered, and blue always became it best.
Here ends the story of Mr. David Faux,
confectioner, and his brother Jacob. And we
see in it, I think, an admirable instance of the unexpected
forms in which the great Nemesis hides herself.
(1860)