“Don’t eat too much marmalade,
Sydney dear. It may make you bilious.”
“Oh, no, auntie dear, I’ll be careful.”
“You have a great deal of butter on your bread,
dear?”
“Yes, auntie; that’s the beauty of it
Miller says ”
“Who is Miller, Syd dear?”
“Our chemistry chap at Loamborough.
He shows us how when you mix acids and alkalis together
they form new combinations which go off in gas.”
“Indeed, dear! Your studies must be very
interesting.”
“Oh, they are, auntie awfly.
That’s how it is with the marmalade and the
fresh butter this is real fresh butter,
isn’t it?”
“Of course, dear. Whatever did you think
it was?”
“Dab, aunt dear. Margarine.
That wouldn’t do, of course; but the marmalade’s
nearly all sugar that’s carbon and
the butters all carbon, too; and then there’s
a lot of acid in the oranges, and it all combines,
and one kills the other and does you good. It
never hurts me. Shall I give you some game pie,
auntie?”
“Thank you, no, my dear, but
you may pass me the dry toast. Thanks.
Pass your cup, my child.”
Sydney Smithers, who, to use his own
term, had been “going in” deeply for the
marmalade, went backwards in his arrangement of the
breakfast comestibles, and helped himself liberally
to the game pie, especially the gelatinous portion,
glancing once at the pale, handsome, sedate-looking
lady presiding at the head of the table ready to meet
his eyes and bestow a smile upon the dear child, her
nephew, who made the Denes his home, when he was not
at Loamborough spending his last terms before commencing
a college career.
“Such a dear, sweet boy,”
Lady Lisle often said to herself, as she beamed upon
him blandly with thirty-five-year-old eyes, and idolised
him, as she had no children of her own, and he was
her own special training.
“At it again,” said the
boy to himself, as he glanced at the lady furtively;
“more letters. Lady doctors, lady barristers.
Blest if I don’t think she means to go in for
a lady parson! More meetings to go to, auntie
dear?” he said aloud.
“Yes, my darling,” replied
the lady, with a sigh and another affectionate beam
upon the plump-looking darling intent upon the game
pie. “The calls made upon my time are rather
heavy. By and by, when you have grown up, I
hope you will be able to help me.”
“Why, of course I will, auntie.
Didn’t I want to write that answer for you
yesterday?”
“Um er yes,
my dear; but we must wait a little first. Your
writing is not quite what I should like to see.”
“No, auntie; it is a bit shaky
yet. We don’t go in for writing much at
Loamborough; we leave that to the Board School cads.”
“And I should like you to be
a little more careful over your spelling.”
“Oh, Mullins, M.A., says that’ll
all come right, auntie, when we’ve quite done
with our classics.”
“I hope so, my darling, and
then you shall be my private secretary. I did
hope at one time that I should win over your uncle
to a love for my pursuits. But alas!”
“Don’t seem in uncle’s
way much, auntie, but he means right, uncle does.
You wait till he’s in the House he’ll
make some of ’em sit up.”
“I hope not, my dear child.
I rather trust to his brother members leading him
into a better way.”
“Ah, I don’t think you
ought to expect that, auntie,” said the “dear
boy,” using his serviette to remove the high-water
mark of coffee from an incipient moustache.
“They go in for all-night sittings, you know.”
“Yes, my dear, but only on emergencies,
and for their country’s good.”
“Walker!” said the “dear boy,”
softly.
“I used to think at one time
that I should be able to wean him from his bad habit
of lying in bed so late. If he would only follow
your example of getting up early enough for a long
walk or ride before breakfast!”
“Nicest part of the day, auntie.”
“Yes, my dear.”
Lady Lisle sighed, and went on eating
crumblets of dry toast and sipping her tea, as she
opened and examined a pile of letters, many of which
had a very charitable-institution-like look about
them; and Sydney Smithers, her nephew, toiled pleasantly
on at taking in stores, till his aunt sighed, glanced
at the door, then at the clock, and then at her nephew.
“Have you finished, Syd, my dear?”
“Yes, auntie, quite.”
“Ha!” sighed the lady,
gathering up her letters, the boy springing up to
assist her in carrying them to the side-table in the
embayed window of the handsome room. “You
will, I know, take advantage of your being with us,
my dear, to avoid those of your poor dear uncle’s
habits which your own good sense will teach you are
not right.”
“Oh, of course, auntie dear.”
“And to follow those which are estimable.”
“To be sure, auntie dear.”
“For your uncle is at heart a noble and generous
gentleman.”
“Regular brick in some things,
auntie,” said the “dear boy,” and
Lady Lisle winced.
“Try not to make use of more
of those scholastic words, Syd dear, than you can
help.”
“All right, auntie, I won’t;
but brick is right enough. Mullins, M.A., says
it’s so suggestive of solidity and square firmness.”
“Yes, my dear, of course, and
I wish you to be firm; but, above all, be a gentleman,
and er careful in your selection
of your friends.”
“Oh, yes, auntie; I am.”
“You see, my dear, it is our
misfortune that the Denes is situated here.”
“But, auntie, it’s a jolly place.”
“Yes, my dear; but it was quite
a wreck from neglect till your uncle married me, and
he er we restored the place his
ancestral home to what it is.”
“You did it up beautifully, auntie.”
“Well, I hope I did, my dear
child, but I have often regretted the money that was
spent over a place situated as it is.”
“Situated, auntie? Why, it’s lovely.”
“Lovely by nature, my dear,
but tainted and made ugly by the surroundings of the
society which affects the district.”
“Is it, auntie?”
“Yes, my dear. I never
could understand why it should be selected by those
dreadful people for their sports and pastimes.”
“You mean the racing, auntie?”
“Yes, my dear” with
a shudder. “Tilborough has become a den
of infamy a place which attracts, so many
times a year, all the ruffiandom of London, to leave
its trail behind. The late Lord Tilborough used
to encourage it with his stablings and horses, and yes,
it’s a great pity: the sweet innocency
of the neighbourhood is destroyed.”
“Yes, auntie.”
“Of course, Lady Tilborough
calls occasionally, and I am compelled to be civil
to her; but I wish you to avoid all communication with
her and her friends as much as possible.”
“Oh, I never see her, auntie,
except when she’s driving. I’ve met
her sometimes when I’ve been out with uncle.”
Lady Lisle winced. “Not
lately, Sydney dear?” she said after a pause.
“Not very lately, auntie.
Last time it was when Dr Granton ”
“That person who comes and stays at Tilborough?”
“Yes, auntie; uncle’s old friend.”
Lady Lisle winced again.
“He’s an awfully jolly chap. You
like him, auntie?”
“No, my child, I do not.
Your uncle’s old friends of his bachelor days
belong to quite a different world from mine.”
“But he’s a clever doctor,
auntie. Done uncle no end of good. Proper
sort of chap to know.”
“How can you judge as to that, my dear?”
said the lady, sternly.
“Well, you see, auntie, one
does get a bit queer sometimes. I had such a
headache the other day when he called to see uncle,
and he laughed at me, and took me over to the hotel
and gave me a dose of stuff that cured it in half
an hour.”
“Sydney, my dear, I beg that
you will never go to that hotel again. Avoid
Tilborough as much as you would any other evil place.
The next time you have a headache either go and see
Dr Linnett or come to me, and I will give you something
out of the medicine-chest. Dr Granton cannot
be an experienced practitioner.”
“Why, they say, auntie, he’s
wonderfully clever over accidents in the hunting field.”
“Yes, in the hunting field,”
said the lady, sarcastically; “but a medical
man’s practice should be at home, and in his
own neighbourhood. A man who attends grooms at
racing stables is to my mind more of what is, I believe,
called a veter ”
“That’s right, auntie a vet.”
“Than a family practitioner,”
continued the lady, sternly; “and it is a source
of great trouble to me that your uncle does not give
up his society. I desire that you avoid him.”
“All right, auntie; I will.”
“Always bear in mind, my dear,
that it is easier to make acquaintances than to end
them.”
“Yes, auntie; I found that out
in Loamborough. Some of the fellows will stick
to you.”
“Say adhere, my child.”
“Yes, auntie.”
“Always bear in mind what a
great future you have before you. Some day I
sincerely hope that day is far distant your
dear grandfather must pass away, and then think of
your future and the position you must hold.
A title and a princely income.”
“Oh, yes; I often think of it
all, auntie. I say, though, I wish the chaps
wouldn’t be quite so fond of chaffing a fellow
about the old guv’nor buying his title.”
“He did not buy it, Sydney,
my dear,” said Lady Lisle, with a faint colour
coming into her cheeks.
“Didn’t he, auntie? They say so.”
“The truth of the matter is, my dear, that the
party ”
“Good old party!” said the “dear
boy” to himself.
“The party was pressed for money
to carry on the Parliamentary warfare, and, with your
dear grandpapa’s noble generosity, he placed
his purse at the party’s disposal.”
“Keeps it pretty close when
I want a few dibs,” said the “dear boy”
to himself.
“And the baronetcy was the very
least return that the retiring Prime Minister could
make him.”
“Oh, that’s it, is it, auntie?”
“Yes, my dear,” said the
lady, laying down one of her secretarial appeals she
had that morning received from the enterprising dun
of the Society for the Propagation of Moral Maxims.
“Yes,” she said, with some show of animation,
“the title was honourably earned and bestowed,
and some day, Syd, my dear boy, you will be very proud
of it. New? Yes, of course it is new.”
“And it’ll grow old, won’t it, auntie?”
“Of course, my dear. And
the Lisles, your dear uncle’s people, need not
be so proud of their old family title. The Lisle,
your uncle’s ancestor, was only a wealthy country
gentleman, who bought his baronetcy of King James
the First.”
“For a thousand quid, auntie?”
“A thousand pounds, my
dear,” said the lady, looking at him wonderingly.
“Yes, auntie; but he was a gentleman.”
“And so is your grandfather,
Sydney, my child,” said the lady, rather austerely.
“Oh, I don’t know about
that,” said the “dear boy,” rather
sulkily. “The fellows at Loamborough are
always chucking the `Devil’ in my face.”
“Syd!”
“They do, auntie it’s
the machine that tears up the old shreds at the mills and
saying grandpa ought to have been made Baron Shoddy.”
“My dear Syd!”
“And do you know what they call me?”
“No, no; and I don’t want to know, sir.”
“Young Devil’s Dust,” snarled the
boy.
“Indeed!” said the lady,
indignantly. “Loamborough was selected
for your education because the pupils were supposed
to be young gentlemen aristocrats.”
“So they are,” grumbled
the boy, “and that’s the worst of them.
Stink with pride.”
“From envious poverty, Sydney, my child.”
“Oh, yes, they’re poor
enough, some of ’em, and glad enough to borrow
my tin.”
“Of course,” said the
lady, bitterly. “The Lisles, too, have
shown me a good deal of haughtiness, but they were
not too proud to see the representative of their family
form an alliance with the Smitherses.”
“When uncle had been sold up two or three times.”
“Don’t allude to such
matters, Sydney, my child,” said the lady, sternly.
“Can’t help it,”
grumbled the boy, sourly, as if his breakfast had not
agreed with him, consequent upon his making improper
combinations of carbon, acid, and alkali “it
stings a bit. The fellows say uncle wouldn’t
have married you if it hadn’t been for the dibs.”
“Sydney, my dear boy, you can
afford to look down with contempt upon such evil,
envious remarks. Your dear uncle fell deeply
in Jove with me, and I with him, and we are extremely
happy. The only trouble I have is to combat er er certain
little weaknesses of his, and yearnings for the er er the ”
“Turf, auntie. Yes, I know.”
“The racing and the gambling
into which he had been led by dissolute companions.
But enough of this, my dear. I find I am being
unconsciously led into details of a very unsavoury
nature. Your uncle is now completely weaned
from his old pursuits, and happy as a model country
gentleman.”
The “dear boy” winked
solemnly at the bronze bust of a great Parliamentary
leader on the chimney-piece, and the lady continued
“In a few days he will address
his constituents at the head of the poll as member
for Deeploamshire.”
“What price Watcombe?” said the “dear
boy,” sharply.
“I do not understand your metaphor,
Sydney, my child,” said the lady, coldly.
“I mean, suppose Watcombe romps in at the race.”
“Race! Oh, my dear boy,
pray do not use that word. If you mean suppose
his adversary should be at the head, pray dismiss the
thought. Your dear uncle must win and take his
seat in the House. Some day I shall see his
nephew, my dear child, following his example the
second baronet of our family. Think of this,
Sydney, and learn to feel proud of descending from
one of the manufacturing commercial princes of the
Midlands, whose clever ingenuity resulted in the invention
of a complicated instrument ”
“Improved devil,” said the “dear
boy” to himself.
“For tearing up old and waste woollen fragments
into fibre and dust.”
“Devils dust,” said Sydney, silently.
“The former being worked up again into cloth ”
“Shoddy,” muttered Sydney.
“And the latter utilised for
fertilising the earth and making it return a hundredfold.”
“Gammon,” said Syd.
“The whole resulting in a colossal fortune.”
“Which the old hunks sticks to like wax,”
said Syd to himself.
“And of which you ought to be very proud, my
dear.”
“Oh, I am, auntie. But
I say, how was it pa and ma went off to Australia?”
“Pray do not revive old troubles,
my dear. My brother never agreed with your grandfather.
I grieve to say he was very wild, and given to horse-racing.
Then he grievously offended your grandfather in the
marriage he made clandestinely. Let it rest,
my dear boy. Papa behaved very handsomely to
John, and gave him ample funds to start a fresh career
at the Antipodes, leaving you to my care to
be my own darling boy to make you a true
English gentleman; and I feel that I have done my
duty by you.”
“Oh, auntie, you are good,”
said the “dear boy.” “I’m
sure I try to do what you wish.”
“Always, my darling, with a
few exceptions. I have found out that.”
“What, auntie?” said the “dear boy,”
changing colour.
“That my darling is a leetle disposed to be
vulgar sometimes.”
“Ha!” sighed the lad, with a look of relief.
“But he is going to be as good
as gold, and grow into a noble gentleman, of whom
his country will be proud. There, now we understand
each other. Mr Trimmer is late this morning.”
“Scissors! How she made
me squirm!” muttered the boy, who had risen and
walked to the window as if to hide his emotion with
the scented white handkerchief he drew from his pocket.
“He isn’t late, auntie just
his usual time.”
“Dear, dear, and your uncle not yet down!”
“Shall I go and rout him out, auntie?”
“No, my dear,” said the
lady, sternly, “I will speak to him when he
comes down.”
“Do, auntie. Tell him
he loses all the fresh morning air,” said the
boy, demurely, feeling in the breast-pocket of his
jacket the while, and causing a faint crackling sound
as of writing-paper, while he noted that the lady
was resuming her perusal of the morning’s letters.
Just then the breakfast-room door
opened and a pretty little dark-eyed parlourmaid entered
the room.
“Mr Trimmer is in the libery, my lady.”
“Show him in here, Jane,”
said Lady Lisle, without raising her eyes, “and
tell Mark to have the pony-carriage round in half an
hour.”
“Yes, my lady.”
The girl turned to go, her eyes meeting
those of the “dear boy,” who favoured
her with a meaning wink, receiving by way of reply
a telegraphic wrinkling up of the skin about a saucy
little retrousse nose.
“Little minx,” said the “dear boy”
to himself.
“Young impudence,” said
the girl, and she closed the door, to return in a
few minutes to show in Mr Trimmer, her ladyship’s
confidential bailiff and steward of the estate.