AN EVENING RIDE

As they rode home in the evening Diana, more nettled with Carew’s impassivity than she would have cared to own, contrived to get a little apart from the others with her uncle, and in her frank, engaging way explained to him the rapaciousness of certain mining companies and her own promise on behalf of the donkeys. Mr. Pym regretted that he could not immediately grant her request without consulting his co-directors, but Diana knew perfectly, by the friendly gleam in his eye, that he meant to look into the question; and because he was impressed by the sturdy, plucky fight of the two brothers he would probably do a good deal more for them in the end.

After which she prattled to him gaily, until Stanley was clever enough to distract her attention and remanipulate the party. He had been riding with Carew, and the engineer with Meryl; but on the party being disarranged the engineer joined Mr. Pym to discuss the mining properties they had been visiting, and Carew found himself unavoidably partnered with Meryl, while Stanley and Diana went gaily on ahead. It was the first time, what he was pleased to term “his luck” had deserted him. Heretofore there had been no single tete-a-tete between him and either of the cousins since Diana surprised him in the temple ruins. It was his fixed intention that there should be none. He argued in himself that he had no “small talk” in his vocabulary, and would only reciprocate the boredom he would himself suffer, and rather than either should be inflicted he steered a resolute course which partnered him with a man. In vain Diana, spurred by pique, had once or twice laid a trap for him; and Meryl, with growing interest, had sought to draw him into conversation. With masterly art he had steered clear of both, and continued his serene, impassive way.

But on that homeward ride Fate, for once, got the better of him. Stanley and Diana were cantering gaily ahead along the narrow path, that meant smooth-going for one horse and a stumbling amid small rocks or long, dry grass for the other; while Mr. Pym and his engineer conversed with a solemnity no one could lightly disturb between the two front horsemen and the two back.

At first Carew rode along with his eyes fixed rigidly on the horizon, and, except for its innate strength, an almost expressionless face. Meryl was a little amused. She realised thoroughly that the situation was none of his seeking, and she was in two minds whether to give him expressionless rigidity in return, or purposely tease him with questions. At first she chose silence, and looked around her with eyes of growing tenderness at the kopje-strewn country.

And so, instead of being irritated with the “small talk” he dreaded, Carew found himself left entirely to his own cogitations; while, judging from her rapt expression, she scarcely realised his presence. And then, just because human nature is stronger, after all, than most things, memory, for the sake of a dream-face he would treasure while he had breath, made him look at her covertly with seeing eyes. He noted first that she was a perfect horsewoman slim and upright and easy, almost like a part of her horse. Both girls rode astride, wearing long holland coats and specially made light top-boots, with large shady sun helmets; and because for a long time he had not seen anything much but slipshod garments among women riders, or exceedingly warm-looking correct home attire, he appreciated their cool smartness.

Unconsciously it took him back to the old buried days, when the Devonshire moors and Devonshire lanes knew no hotter rider than Peter Carew. To the steeplechases, when he was so slim and wiry that, in spite of his height, he had ridden many a horse to victory. To the polo matches, when his matchless horsemanship had scored goal after goal for his regiment of picked riders. She recalled to his mind the stag-hunting in Devon and Somerset, where the first women had ridden astride to the meet, realising mercifully how the steep ascents and descents were eased for their horses, without the tightly girthed side-saddle, and for themselves without the side-seat strain. Almost as if it were a carefully permitted luxury, he saw the wide, wind-swept moors, heard the cheery shouts and the excited hounds, felt his thoroughbred sweeping gloriously along, as if its soul and his soul were both one in feeling the joy and exhilaration of the chase. What glories there were in those wind-swept, sun-bathed mornings in Devon! What joy of life! What lust of manhood! What splendid, whole-hearted young inconsequence! In his heart he smiled a little grimly. Peter Carew of the Blues had been no shunner of women in those days; no taciturn, silent, unappreciative onlooker. Rather he had loved too many, kissed too freely, ridden away too light-heartedly.

Until the blue-grey eyes, so like Meryl’s, looked shyly up, and then in their turn ran away from him. Of course, he had followed blindly like the hot-headed, hard-riding sportsman he was followed blindly, wooed irresistibly, and won gloriously.

And then ...

Over the kopjes, over the vleis, over the veldt a black cloud came down, and suddenly all the picture was blotted out. An expression that was momentarily almost wistful left the fine mouth; the far-away softness left the keen blue eyes, and his face hardened strangely. Then he looked up at Meryl, riding beside him, and saw all the questioning interest in her face.

“I’m afraid you have a very dull companion,” he said; but it was in the voice that Diana usually called his snarl.

Meryl smiled. “I did not for a moment suppose that you would talk.”

She could hardly say that his face relaxed, but at least there was that in it which suggested he liked her answer far better than any conventional politeness.

Suddenly a wholly unlooked-for twinkle lurked somewhere in his eyes.

“Bears don’t usually,” he said.

Meryl laughed. “Diana is too fond of nicknaming her friends and acquaintances; but on the whole I think she has let you off lightly. A bear is a magnificent animal.”

“Not given to much amiability. No Prince Charming, for instance,” and he smiled a little grimly.

“But strong and well dangerous, which is better.”

“You think so?” He looked at her rather curiously.

“Decidedly.”

They rode on in silence, and, for a little way, the road being rough, he reined in his horse to the narrow path behind her. Then, when it grew smoother again, she waited for him to come alongside.

“You haven’t always been in this part of Rhodesia?”

“No; only recently.”

“Long enough to get very attached to it.”

“More or less,” and suddenly his voice hardened a little, as if scenting a discussion and wishful to ward it off.

“I wonder why Rhodesia is so fascinating?” And her eyes roved with love in them from far horizon to far horizon. “I suppose you do not attempt to analyse it? You are content to care unquestioningly.”

“Yes” with an effort “after a time, one just cares.”

“And at first?...”

“At first one has to find one’s footing, so to speak. She is somewhat the bewildering, uncomfortable stranger to the new-comer.”

She marvelled that he should say so much, but hid her pleasure lest she should unwittingly change his mood.

“She has never seemed that to me. Something has attracted me from the very first. I came, I saw, I loved.”

“You must remember that you came under exceptional circumstances.”

“And you?”

“I was among the early pioneers.”

“How splendid! I wish I could say the same.”

“It was extremely uncomfortable.”

“But you didn’t mind. I don’t need to be told that. There was so much to make up for it. How good it must be to be a man!”

“Yet the women are the true heroes out here.”

“Why?”

“We get what we came for. Interest, excitement of a kind, freedom....”

“And the women?”

“There is not much for the women, but the plucky ones are often heroines.”

“Only no one tells them so?”

“No one tells them so; therein lies the heroism.”

“I see. They put up a good fight, and no one says, ‘Well done!’ Isn’t it the same with the men?”

“The men get many compensations.”

“Compensations that make it worth while?”

“Distinctly.”

They rode on in silence, both looking ahead to the blue mountain that guards the north of Zimbabwe. The peaceful loveliness soothed his spirit because he loved it, but in her it awakened a vague, swift ache. She felt somehow that he had a right to love the country, because he had made it his and given it of his best; that, for all his presumable poverty in many things, he was yet so rich in what he had achieved, and in what he had won for himself of interest and usefulness. While for her?... She was an alien, a mere tourist, a looker-on; the daughter of a millionaire who came to Rhodesia for wealth, and gave how little in return!

He might look at the tender outline of the lovely mountain with the glad, restful consciousness of work well done. She could only look at it with that ache of divine discontent: unplumbed, wordless longing. Even the heroism of the settler’s wife was not for her. The women who were plucky enough to put up that good fight, although no one ever said “Well done!” Compared with them, in his eyes she was probably a mere cumberer of the earth; an ornament, intended only to be admired by the leisured classes. The young splendid country had no use for her, no place for her. She was an alien, an interloper; child of a man who came only for gain, and took his gain elsewhere, recognising no claim from a land that was no home to him, only an investment.

Her soul cried out it was no wish of hers that it should be so; but only silent condemnation seemed to echo back to her from the far blue hills.

She glanced at the strong, serene face of her companion, and because somehow he seemed a little less stern and uncompromising to-day she said to him simply, leaning a little to his side:

“I envy you so, the sense that you have won the right to love her. I envy the plucky settlers’ wives who are the mothers of her future. I feel myself so utterly an alien. Has Rhodesia any use for ... for such as I?”

He looked at her strangely, and as he looked she saw an expression almost like hungry longing come into his eyes; then as suddenly vanish again, leaving him utterly amazingly stony. He turned his head sharply, and his gaze became fixed and rigid.

“Millionaires’ daughters can usually be pretty useful if they like,” he said almost brutally; and she felt as if he had struck her. In sudden anger and bewilderment she touched her horse with her whip and darted ahead. It was not the words, but the way in which he had said them. What did he mean?... What did he not mean?... She bit her lips to keep back the smarting tears that blinded her eyes. She felt as if she hated him. For a little space he had been so different to the cold, callous soldier, and in quiet response she had spoken from her heart; and in return he had said this cutting thing with cold intent, making her feel that he despised her. Did he see in her only a willing accomplice to her father’s money-making schemes? The one perhaps who spent the gains heartlessly and carelessly elsewhere? Beside those settlers’ wives he had said were heroines, was she but an idle, contemptible, useless heiress? She spurred her horse on, letting her thoughts run away with her, unwilling that he should overtake her until she had got herself well in hand; and Carew followed behind, feeling again that sense of a black, rayless abyss all about him. Why had he looked full and deep into her eyes like that?... Why had he not gazed only upon the mountains that soothed and refreshed him?... The mere discovery that the past he thought to have outlived slept so lightly was a shock to him. Had he not then outlived anything? Had he only put his memories lightly to sleep, and dreamt all the life he had lived since? He was scarcely conscious that he had said anything inconsiderate; he hardly knew what he had said. He only remembered he had looked full and deep into beautiful eyes, and suddenly it was as though his dead love Joan had come back to him.

Presently she slowed down so that he came up to her, and it was noticeable that something in her whole attitude had changed. She was as upright as he now, and her eyes also looked rigidly ahead. He saw the change without understanding it and wondered a little, without troubling to probe.

“Your friends, Mr. and Mrs. Grenville,” she said coldly, “would they care to see us if we called, or would they think it perhaps just vulgar curiosity?”

“They would be delighted; visitors are a very rare treat to them.” He was puzzled a little at her manner, but let it pass. Meryl had it on the tip of her tongue to add, “They don’t mind even millionaires’ daughters?” but her own good taste saved her from a momentary satisfaction that a man of his breeding could only have considered bourgeoise.

“Perhaps Mr. Stanley would take us,” was all she suffered herself; and added, “From his account Mrs. Grenville is evidently one of Rhodesia’s heroines.”

“She is,” he answered so simply that Meryl felt a little nonplussed.

When they reached the camp Diana had already dismounted and gone into their tent, whither Meryl followed her.

“Well,” she said, “how did you get on with The Bear? Did he chore you up over anything?”

Meryl considered a moment before replying. “One moment I thought him the rudest man I have ever met, and the next ...” she seemed puzzled how to explain.

“And the next I suppose he didn’t seem a man at all, only a pillar of stone!...”

For answer, she said thoughtfully, “I wonder if something hurt him very badly some time or other?”

“If it did, it doesn’t exempt him from the ordinary amenities of human intercourse. He isn’t the only man who has been hurt.” And Diana kicked off her boots impatiently.

“No,” said Meryl; “but it makes it a little easier to forgive him.”

“Don’t do anything so foolish. You’ll end by thinking him interesting and falling in love with him; which would be too utterly silly when you are as good as engaged to Dutch Willy, and when he, The Bear, would care about as much as my foot,” with which dictum she put her head out through the tent flap, and called to Stanley and Carew, “Hey! Mr. Stanley! don’t go away. Stay and keep us company in my uncle’s absence. I believe he is venturing into The Bear’s den to-night.”

Carew smiled quite frankly for him.

“Can’t I tempt you to come also? I daren’t promise you a decent dinner, but I’ve some fresh Abdullah cigarettes out from home, if you care to come down afterwards.”

Diana was disarmed in spite of herself. “And will you promise to growl very prettily?” with an arch expression.

“I’ll try not to frighten you away too quickly.”

Diana withdrew into the tent.

“O!” she said, “he’s a bear with two faces; and that’s the most difficult to cope with of all.”