Kate had been kept awake during the
dark hours with a sound in her ears that was like
the measured ringing of far-off bells. When the
daylight came she slept a troubled sleep, and when
she awoke she had a sense of stupefaction, as if she
had taken a drug, and was not yet recovered from the
effects of it. Nancy came bouncing into her room
and crying, “It’s your wedding-day, Kitty!”
She answered by repeating mechanically, “It’s
your wedding day, Kitty.”
There was an expression of serenity
on her face; she even smiled a little. A sort
of vague gaiety came over her, such as comes to one
who has watched long in agony and suspense by the
bed of a sick person and the person is dead.
Nancy drew the little window curtain aside, stooped
down, and looked out and said, “‘Happy
the bride the sun shines on’ they’re saying,
and look! the sun is shining.”
“Oh, but the sun is an old sly-boots,”
she answered.
They came up to dress her. She
kept stumbling against things, and then laughing in
a faint way. The dress was the new one, and when
they had put it on they stood back from her and shouted
with delight. She took up the little broken hand-glass
to look at herself. Her great eyes sparkled piteously.
The church bells began to ring her
wedding-peal. She had to listen hard to hear
it. All sounds seemed to be very far away; everything
looked a long way off. She was living in a sort
of dead white dawn of thought and feeling.
At last they came to say the coach
was ready and everything was waiting for the bride.
She repeated their message like a machine, made a slow
gesture, and followed them downstairs. When she
got near to the bottom, she looked around on the faces
below as if expecting to see somebody. Just then
her father was saying, “Mr. Christian is to meet
us at the church.”
She smiled faintly and answered the
people’s greetings in an indistinct tone.
There was some indulgent whispering at sight of her
pale face. “Pale but genteel,” said
some one, and then Nancy reached over and drew the
bride’s veil down over her face.
At the next minute she was outside
the house, standing at the back of the wagonette.
The coachman, with his white rosette, was holding the
door open on one side, and her father was elevating
her hand on the other.
“Am I to go, then?” she asked in a helpless
voice.
“Well, what do you think?”
said Caesar. “Shall the man slip off and
get married to himself, think you?”
There was laughter among the people
standing round, and she laughed also and stepped into
the coach. Her mother followed her, crinkling
in noisy old silk, and Nancy Joe came next, smelling
of lavender and hair-oil. Then her father got
in, and then Pete, with his great warm presence.
A salute of six guns was fired straight
up by the coach-windows. The horses pranced,
Nancy screamed, and Grannie started, but Kate gave
no sign. People were closing round the coach-door
and shouting altogether as at a fair. “Good
luck to you, boy. Good luck! Good luck!”
Pete was answering in a rolling voice that seemed
to be lifting the low roof off, and at the same time
flinging money out in handfuls as the horses moved
away.
They were going slowly down the road.
From somewhere in front came the sound of a clarionet.
It was playing “the Black and the Grey.”
Immediately behind there was the tramp of people walking
with an even step, and on either side the rustle of
an irregular crowd. The morning was warm and
beautiful. Here and there the last of the golden
cushag glistened on the hedges with the first of the
autumn gorse. They passed two or three houses
that had been made roofless by the recent storm, and
once or twice they came on a fallen tree-trunk with
its thin leaves yellowing on the fading grass.
Kate was floating vaguely through
these sights and sounds. It was all like a dream
to her a waking dream in shadow-land.
She knew where she was and where she was going.
Some glimmering of hope was left yet. She was
half expecting a miracle of some sort. Philip
would be at the church. Something supernatural
would occur.
They drew up sharply, the glass of
the windows rattled, and the talk that had been going
on in the carriage ceased. “Here we are,”
cried Caesar; there were voices outside, and then
the others inside stepped down. She saw a hand
held out to her and knew whose it was before her eyes
had risen to the face. Philip was there.
He was helping her to alight.
“Am I to get down too?” she asked in a
helpless way.
Caesar said something that made the
people laugh again, and then she smiled like faded
sunshine and took the hand of Philip. She held
it a moment as if expecting him to say something,
but he only raised his hat. His face was white
as marble. He will speak yet, she thought.
Over the gateway to the churchyard
there was an arch of flowers and evergreens, with
an inscription in coloured letters: “God
bless the happy pair.” The sloping path
going down as to a dell was strewn with gilvers and
slips of fuchsia.
At the bottom stood the old church
mantled in ivy, like a rock of the sea covered by
green moss.
Leaning on her father’s arm
she walked in at the porch. The church was full
of people. As they passed under the gallery there
was a twittering as of birds. The Sunday-school
girls were up there, looking down and talking eagerly.
Then the coughing and hemming ceased; there was a sort
of deep inspiration; the church seemed to hold its
breath for a moment. After that there were broken
exclamations, and the coughing and hemming began again.
“How pale!” “Not fit,
poor thing.” Everybody was pitying her
starved features.
“Stand here,” said somebody in a soft
voice.
“Must I?” she said quite loudly.
All at once she was aware that she
was alone before the communion rail, with the parson old
ruddy-faced Parson Quiggin in his white
surplice facing her. Some one came and stood
beside her. It was Pete. She did not look
at him, but she felt his warm presence again, and was
relieved. It was like shelter from the eyes around.
After a moment she turned about Philip was one step
behind Pete. His head was bent.
Then the service began. The voice
of the parson muttered words in a low voice, but she
did not listen. She found herself trying to spell
out the Manx text printed over the chancel arch:
“Bannet T’eshyn Ta Cheet ayns Ennyn y
Chearn” ("Blessed is he that cometh in the name
of the Lord").
Suddenly the words the parson was
speaking leapt into meaning and made her quiver.
“.... is commended of Saint
Paul to be honourable among all men, and therefore
not by any to be enterprised, nor taken in hand unadvisedly,
lightly, or wantonly ”
She seemed to know that Philip’s
eyes were on her. They were on the back of her
head, and the veil over her face began to shake.
The voice of the parson was going on again
“Therefore if any man can show
just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together,
let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold
his peace.”
She turned half around. Her eyes
fell on Philip. His face was colourless, almost
fierce; his forehead was deathly white. She was
sure that something was about to happen.
Now was the moment for the miracle.
It seemed to her as if the whole congregation were
beginning to divine what tie there was between him
and her. She did not care, for he would soon
declare it. He was going to do so now; he had
raised his head, he was about to speak.
No, there was no miracle. Philip’s
eyes fell before her eyes, and his head went down.
He was only digging at the red baize with one of his
feet. She felt tired, so very tired, and oh! so
cold. The parson had gone on with his reading.
When she caught up with him he was saying
“ as ye shall, answer
at the great day of judgment, when the secrets of
all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you
know any impediment why ye may not be lawfully joined
together in matrimony, ye do now confess it.”
The parson paused. He had always
paused at that point. The pause had no meaning
for him, but for Kate how much! Impediment!
There was indeed an impediment. Confess?
How could she ever confess? The warning terrified
her. It seemed to have been made for her alone.
She had heard it before, and thought nothing of it.
Now it seemed to scorch her very soul. She began
to tremble violently.
There was an indistinct murmur which
she did not catch. The parson seemed to be speaking
to Pete
“ love her, comfort
her, honour and keep her... so long as ye both shall
live.”
And then came Pete’s voice,
full and strong from his great chest, but far off,
and going by her ear like a voice in a shell “I
will.”
After that the parson’s words
seemed to be falling on her face.
“Wilt thou have this man to
thy wedded husband, to live together after God’s
ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony? Wilt
thou obey him and serve him, love, honour, and keep
him in sickness and in health; and forsaking all other,
keep thee unto him, so long as ye both shall live?”
Kate was far away. She was spelling
out the Manx text, “Bannet T’eshyn Ta
Cheet,” but the letters were dancing in and out
of each other, and yellow lights were darting from
her eyes. Suddenly she was aware that the parson’s
voice had stopped. There was blank silence, then
an uneasy rustle, and then somebody was saying something
in a soft tone.
“Eh?” she said aloud.
The parson’s voice came now in a whisper at
her breast “Say, ‘I will.’”
“Ah I,” she murmured.
“I-will! That’s all, my dear.
Say it with me, ‘I will.’”
She framed her lips to speak, but
the words were half uttered by the parson. The
next thing she knew was that a stray hand was holding
her hand. She felt more safe now that her poor
cold fingers lay in that big warm palm.
It was Pete, and he was speaking again.
She did not so much hear him as feel his voice tingling
through her veins.
“I, Peter Quilliam, take thee, Katherine Cregeen ’”
But it was all a vague murmur, fraying
off into nothing, ending like a wave with a long upward
plash of low sound.
The parson was speaking to her again,
softly, gently, caressingly, almost as if she were
a frightened child. “Don’t be afraid,
my dear! try to speak after me. Take your time.”
Then, aloud, “‘I, Katherine Cregeen.’”
Her throat gurgled; she faltered,
but she spoke at length in the toneless voice of one
who speaks in sleep.
“‘I, Katherine Cregeen –’”
“‘Take thee, Peter Quilliam ’”
And then all came in a rush, with
some of the words distinctly repeated, and some of
them droned and dropped
The last word fell like a broken echo,
and then there was a rustle in the church, and much
audible breathing. Some of the school-girls in
the gallery were reaching over the pews with parted
lips and dancing eyes.
Pete had taken her left hand, and
was putting the ring on her finger. She was conscious
of his warm breath and of the words
“With this ring I thee wed,
with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly
goods I thee endow, Amen.”
Again she left her cold hand in Pete’s
warm hand. He was stroking it on the outside
with his other one.
It was all a dream. She seemed
to rally from it as she moved down the aisle.
Ghostly faces were smiling at her out of the air on
either side, and the choir in the gallery behind the
school-girls were singing the psalm, with John the
Clerk’s husky voice drawling out the first word
of each new verse as his companions were singing the
last word of the preceding one
“Thy wife shall be as the fruitful
vine upon the walls of thine house;
Thy children like the olive branches round
about thy table.
As it was in the beginning, is now, and
ever shall be;
World without end, A men.”
They were all in the vestry now, standing
together in a group. Her mother was wiping her
eyes, Pete was laughing, and Nancy Joe was nudging
him and saying in an audible whisper, “Kiss her,
man it’s only respectable.”
The parson was leaning over the table.
He spoke to Pete, and then said, “A substantial
mark, too. The lady’s turn next.”
The open book was before her, and
the pen was put into her hand. When she laid
it down, the parson returned his spectacles to their
sheath, and a nervous voice, which thrilled and frightened
her, said from behind, “Let me be the first
to wish you happiness, Mrs. Quilliam.”
It was Philip. She turned towards
him, and their eyes met for a moment. But she
was only conscious of his prominent nose, his clear-cut
chin, his rapid smile like sunshine, disappearing
as before a cloud. He said something else something
about a new life and a new beginning but
she could not gather its meaning, her mind would not
take it in. At the next moment they were all
in the open air.