The walls of the big living-room in
the Arrowhead ranch house are tastefully enlivened
here and there with artistic spoils of the owner,
Mrs. Lysander John Pettengill. There are family
portraits in crayon, photo-engravings of noble beasts
clipped from the Breeder’s Gazette, an
etched cathedral or two, a stuffed and varnished trout
of such size that no one would otherwise have believed
in it, a print in three colours of a St. Bernard dog
with a marked facial resemblance to the late William
E. Gladstone, and a triumph of architectural perspective
revealing two sides of the Pettengill block, corner
of Fourth and Main streets, Red Gap, made vivacious
by a bearded fop on horseback who doffs his silk hat
to a couple of overdressed ladies with parasols in
a passing victoria.
And there is the photograph of the
fat man. He is very large both high
and wide. He has filled the lens and now compels
the eye. His broad face beams a friendly interest.
His moustache is a flourishing, uncurbed, riotous
growth above his billowy chin.
The checked coat, held recklessly
aside by a hand on each hip, reveals an incredible
expanse of waistcoat, the pattern of which raves horribly.
From pocket to pocket of this gaudy shield curves a
watch chain of massive links nearly a yard
of it, one guesses.
Often I have glanced at this noisy
thing tacked to the wall, entranced by the simple
width of the man. Now on a late afternoon I loitered
before it while my hostess changed from riding breeches
to the gown of lavender and lace in which she elects
to drink tea after a day’s hard work along the
valleys of the Arrowhead. And for the first time
I observed a line of writing beneath the portrait,
the writing of my hostess, a rough, downright, plain
fashion of script: “Reading from left to
right Mr. Ben Sutton, Popular Society Favourite
of Nome, Alaska.”
“Reading from left to right!”
Here was the intent facetious. And Ma Pettengill
is never idly facetious. Always, as the advertisements
say, “There’s a reason!” And now,
also for the first time, I noticed some printed verses
on a sheet of thickish yellow paper tacked to the wall
close beside the photograph so close that
I somehow divined an intimate relationship between
the two. With difficulty removing my gaze from
the gentleman who should be read from left to right,
I scanned these verses:
Song of the
open road
A child of the road a
gypsy I
My path o’er
the land and sea;
With the fire of youth I warm
my nights
And my days are
wild and free.
Then ho! for the wild, the
open road!
Afar from the
haunts of men.
The woods and the hills for
my spirit untamed
I’m away
to mountain and glen.
If ever I tried to leave my
hills
To abide in the
cramped haunts of men,
The urge of the wild to her
wayward child
Would drag me
to freedom again.
I’m slave to the call
of the open road;
In your cities
I’d stifle and die.
I’m off to the hills
in fancy I see
On the breast
of old earth I’ll lie.
Wilfred Lennox,
the Hobo Poet,
On a Coast-to-Coast Walking
Tour.
These Cards for sale.
I briefly pondered the lyric.
It told its own simple story and could at once have
been dismissed but for its divined and puzzling relationship
to the popular society favourite of Nome, Alaska.
What could there be in this?
Mrs. Lysander John Pettengill bustled
in upon my speculation, but as usual I was compelled
to wait for the talk I wanted. For some moments
she would be only the tired owner of the Arrowhead
Ranch in the tea gown of a debutante and
with too much powder on one side of her nose and
she must have at least one cup of tea so corrosive
that the Scotch whiskey she adds to it is but a merciful
dilution. She now drank eagerly of the fearful
brew, dulled the bite of it with smoke from a hurriedly
built cigarette, and relaxed gratefully into one of
those chairs which are all that most of us remember
William Morris for. Even then she must first
murmur of the day’s annoyances, provided this
time by officials of the United States Forest Reserve.
In the beginning I must always allow her a little
to have her own way.
“The annual spring rumpus with
them rangers,” she wearily boomed. “Every
year they tell me just where to turn my cattle out
on the Reserve, and every year I go ahead and turn
’em out where I want ’em turned out, which
ain’t the same place at all, and then I have
to listen patiently to their kicks and politely answer
all letters from the higher-ups and wait for the official
permit, which always comes and it’s
wearing on a body. Darn it! They’d
ought to know by this time I always get my own way.
If they wasn’t such a decent bunch I’d
have words with ’em, giving me the same trouble
year after year, probably because I’m a weak,
defenceless woman. However!”
The lady rested largely, inert save
for the hand that raised the cigarette automatically
to her lips. My moment had come.
“What did Wilfred Lennox, the
hobo poet, have to do with Mr. Ben Sutton, of Nome,
Alaska?” I gently inquired.
“More than he wanted,”
replied the lady. Her glance warmed with memories;
she hovered musingly on the verge of recital.
But the cigarette was half done and at its best.
I allowed her another moment, a moment in which she
laughed confidentially to herself, a little dry, throaty
laugh. I knew that laugh. She would be marshalling
certain events in their just and diverting order.
But they seemed to be many and of confusing values.
“Some said he not only wasn’t
a hobo but wasn’t even a poet,” she presently
murmured, and smoked again. Then: “That
Ben Sutton, now, he’s a case. Comes from
Alaska and don’t like fresh eggs for breakfast
because he says they ain’t got any kick to ’em
like Alaska eggs have along in March, and he’s
got to have canned milk for his coffee. Say, I
got a three-quarters Jersey down in Red Gap gives milk
so rich that the cream just naturally trembles into
butter if you speak sharply to it or even give it
a cross look; not for Ben though. Had to send
out for canned milk that morning. I drew the
line at hunting up case eggs for him though.
He had to put up with insipid fresh ones. And
fat, that man! My lands! He travels a lot
in the West when he does leave home, and he tells
me it’s the fear of his life he’ll get
wedged into one of them narrow-gauge Pullmans some
time and have to be chopped out. Well, as I was
saying ” She paused.
“But you haven’t begun,”
I protested. I sharply tapped the printed verses
and the photograph reading from left to right.
Now she became animated, speaking as she expertly
rolled a fresh cigarette.
“Say, did you ever think what
aggravating minxes women are after they been married
a few years after the wedding ring gets
worn a little bit thin?”
This was not only brutal; it seemed irrelevant.
“Wilfred Lennox ”
I tried to insist, but she commandingly raised the
new cigarette at me.
“Yes, sir! Ever know one
of ’em married for as long as ten years that
didn’t in her secret heart have a sort of contempt
for her life partner as being a stuffy, plodding truck
horse? Of course they keep a certain dull respect
for him as a provider, but they can’t see him
as dashing and romantic any more; he ain’t daring
and adventurous. All he ever does is go down
and open up the store or push back the roll-top, and
keep from getting run over on the street. One
day’s like another with him, never having any
wild, lawless instincts or reckless moods that make
a man fascinating about the nearest he
ever comes to adventure is when he opens the bills
the first of the month. And she often seeing him
without any collar on, and needing a shave mebbe,
and cherishing her own secret romantic dreams, while
like as not he’s prosily figuring out how he’s
going to make the next payment on the endowment policy.
“It’s a hard, tiresome
life women lead, chained to these here plodders.
That’s why rich widows generally pick out the
dashing young devils they do for their second, having
buried the man that made it for ’em. Oh,
they like him well enough, call him ‘Father’
real tenderly, and see that he changes to the heavy
flannels on time, but he don’t ever thrill them,
and when they order three hundred and fifty dollars’
worth of duds from the Boston Cash Emporium and dress
up like a foreign countess, they don’t do it
for Father, they do it for the romantic guy in the
magazine serial they’re reading, the handsome,
cynical adventurer that has such an awful power over
women. They know darned well they won’t
ever meet him; still it’s just as well to be
ready in case he ever should make Red Gap or
wherever they live and it’s easy with
the charge account there, and Father never fussing
more than a little about the bills.
“Not that I blame ’em.
We’re all alike innocent enough, with
freaks here and there that ain’t. Why,
I remember about a thousand years ago I was reading
a book called ‘Lillian’s Honour,’
in which the rightful earl didn’t act like an
earl had ought to, but went travelling off over the
moors with a passel of gypsies, with all the she-gypsies
falling in love with him, and no wonder he
was that dashing. Well, I used to think what
might happen if he should come along while Lysander
John was out with the beef round-up or something.
I was well-meaning, understand, but at that I’d
ought to have been laid out with a pick-handle.
Oh, the nicest of us got specks inside us if
ever we did cut loose the best one of us would make
the worst man of you look like nothing worse than a
naughty little boy cutting up in Sunday-school.
What holds us, of course we always dream
of being took off our feet; of being carried off by
main force against our wills while we snuggle up to
the romantic brute and plead with him to spare us and
the most reckless of ’em don’t often get
their nerve up to that. Well, as I was saying ”
But she was not saying. The thing
moved too slowly. And still the woman paltered
with her poisoned tea and made cigarettes and muttered
inconsequently, as when she now broke out after a glance
at the photograph:
“That Ben Sutton certainly runs
amuck when he buys his vests. He must have about
fifty, and the quietest one in the lot would make a
leopard skin look like a piker.” Again
her glance dreamed off to visions.
I seated myself before her with some
emphasis and said firmly: “Now, then!”
It worked.
“Wilfred Lennox,” she
began, “calling himself the hobo poet, gets into
Red Gap one day and makes the rounds with that there
piece of poetry you see; pushes into stores and offices
and hands the piece out, and like as not they crowd
a dime or two bits onto him and send him along.
That’s what I done. I was waiting in Dr.
Percy Hailey Martingale’s office for a little
painless dentistry, and I took Wilfred’s poem
and passed him a two-bit piece, and Doc Martingale
does the same, and Wilfred blew on to the next office.
A dashing and romantic figure he was, though kind of
fat and pasty for a man that was walking from coast
to coast, but a smooth talker with beautiful features
and about nine hundred dollars’ worth of hair
and a soft hat and one of these flowing neckties.
Red it was.
“So I looked over his piece
of poetry about the open road for his untamed
spirit and him being stifled in the cramped haunts
of men and of course I get his number.
All right about the urge of the wild to her wayward
child, but here he was spending a lot of time in the
cramped haunts of men taking their small change away
from ’em and not seeming to stifle one bit.
“Ain’t this new style
of tramp funny? Now instead of coming round to
the back door and asking for a hand-out like any self-respecting
tramp had ought to, they march up to the front door,
and they’re somebody with two or three names
that’s walking round the world on a wager they
made with one of the Vanderbilt boys or John D. Rockefeller.
They’ve walked thirty-eight hundred miles already
and got the papers to prove it a letter
from the mayor of Scranton, Pennsylvania, and the mayor
of Davenport, Iowa, a picture post card of themselves
on the courthouse steps at Denver, and they’ve
bet forty thousand dollars they could start out without
a cent and come back in twenty-two months with money
in their pocket and ain’t it a good
joke? with everybody along the way entering
into the spirit of it and passing them quarters and
such, and thank you very much for your two bits for
the picture post card and they got another
showing ’em in front of the Mormon Tabernacle
at Salt Lake City, if you’d like that, too and
thank you again and now they’ll be
off once more to the open road and the wild, free life.
Not! Yes, two or three good firm Nots. Having
milked the town they’ll be right down to the
dee-po with their silver changed to bills, waiting
for N to come along, and ho! for the open railroad
and another town that will skin pretty. I guess
I’ve seen eight or ten of them boys in the last
five years, with their letters from mayors.
“But this here Wilfred Lennox
had a new graft. He was the first I’d give
up to for mere poetry. He didn’t have a
single letter from a mayor, nor even a picture card
of himself standing with his hat off in front of Pike’s
Peak nothing but poetry. But, as I
said, he was there with a talk about pining for the
open road and despising the cramped haunts of men,
and he had appealing eyes and all this flowing hair
and necktie. So I says to myself: ‘All
right, Wilfred, you win!’ and put my purse back
in my bag and thought no more of it.
“Yet not so was it to be.
Wilfred, working the best he could to make a living
doing nothing, pretty soon got to the office of Alonzo
Price, Choice Improved Real Estate and Price’s
Addition. Lon was out for the moment, but who
should be there waiting for him but his wife, Mrs.
Henrietta Templeton Price, recognized leader of our
literary and artistic set. Or I think they call
it a ‘group’ or a ‘coterie’
or something. Setting at Lon’s desk she
was, toying petulantly with horrid old pens and blotters,
and probably bestowing glances of disrelish from time
to time round the grimy office where her scrubby little
husband toiled his days away in unromantic squalor.
“I got to tell you about Henrietta.
She’s one of them like I just said the harsh
things about, with the secret cry in her heart for
romance and adventure and other forbidden things and
with a kindly contempt for peaceful Alonzo. She
admits to being thirty-six, so you can figure it out
for yourself. Of course she gets her husband wrong
at that, as women so often do. Alonzo has probably
the last pair of side whiskers outside of a steel
engraving and stands five feet two, weighing a hundred
and twenty-six pounds at the ring side, but he’s
game as a swordfish, and as for being romantic in
the true sense of the word well, no one
that ever heard him sell a lot in Price’s Addition three
miles and a half up on the mesa, with only the smoke
of the canning factory to tell a body they was still
near the busy haunts of men, that and a mile of concrete
sidewalk leading a life of complete idleness I
say no one that ever listened to Lon sell a lot up
there, pointing out on a blue print the proposed site
of the Carnegie Library, would accuse him of not being
romantic.
“But of course Henrietta never
sees Lon’s romance and he ain’t always
had the greatest patience with hers like
the time she got up the Art Loan Exhibit to get new
books for the M.E. Sabbath-school library and
got Spud Mulkins of the El Adobe to lend ’em
the big gold-framed oil painting that hangs over his
bar. Some of the other ladies objected to this the
picture was a big pink hussy lying down beside the
ocean but Henrietta says art for art’s
sake is pure to them that are pure, or something,
and they’re doing such things constantly in the
East; and I’m darned if Spud didn’t have
his oil painting down and the mosquito netting ripped
off it before Alonzo heard about it and put the Not-at-All
on it. He wouldn’t reason with Henrietta
either. He just said his objection was that every
man that saw it would put one foot up groping for
the brass railing, which would be undignified for a
Sabbath-school scheme, and that she’d better
hunt out something with clothes on like Whistler’s
portrait of his mother, or, if she wanted the nude
in art, to get the Horse Fair or something with animals.
“I tell you that to show you
how they don’t hit it off sometimes. Then
Henrietta sulks. Kind of pinched and hungry looking
she is, drapes her black hair down over one side of
her high forehead, wears daring gowns that’s
what she calls ’em anyway and reads
the most outrageous kinds of poetry out loud to them
that will listen. Likes this Omar Something stuff
about your path being beset with pitfalls and gin fizzes
and getting soused out under a tree with your girl.
“I’m just telling you
so you’ll get Henrietta when Wilfred Lennox drips
gracefully in with his piece of poetry in one hand.
Of course she must have looked long and nervously
at Wilfred, then read his poetry, then looked again.
There before her was Romance against a background of
Alonzo Price, who never had an adventurous or evil
thought in his life, and wore rubbers! Oh, sure!
He must have palsied her at once, this wild, free
creature of the woods who couldn’t stand the
cramped haunts of men. And I have said that Wilfred
was there with the wild, free words about himself,
and the hat and tie and the waving brown hair that
give him so much trouble. Shucks! I don’t
blame the woman. It’s only a few years
since we been let out from under lock and key.
Give us a little time to get our bearings, say I.
Wilfred was just one big red splash before her yearning
eyes; he blinded her. And he stood there telling
how this here life in the marts of trade would sure
twist and blacken some of the very finest chords in
his being. Something like that it must have been.
“Anyway, about a quarter to
six a procession went up Fourth Street, consisting
of Wilfred Lennox, Henrietta, and Alonzo. The
latter was tripping along about three steps back of
the other two and every once in a while he would stop
for a minute and simply look puzzled. I saw him.
It’s really a great pity Lon insists on wearing
a derby hat with his side whiskers. To my mind
the two never seem meant for each other.
“The procession went to the
Price mansion up on Ophir Avenue. And that evening
Henrietta had in a few friends to listen to the poet
recite his verses and tell anecdotes about himself.
About five or six ladies in the parlour and their
menfolks smoking out on the front porch. The men
didn’t seem to fall for Wilfred’s open-road
stuff the way the ladies did. Wilfred was a good
reciter and held the ladies with his voice and his
melting blue eyes with the long lashes, and Henrietta
was envied for having nailed him. That is, the
women envied her. The men sort of slouched off
down to the front gate and then went down to the Temperance
Billiard Parlour, where several of ’em got stewed.
Most of ’em, like old Judge Ballard, who come
to the country in ’62, and Jeff Tuttle, who’s
always had more than he wanted of the open road, were
very cold indeed to Wilfred’s main proposition.
It is probable that low mutterings might have been
heard among ’em, especially after a travelling
man that was playing pool said the hobo poet had come
in on the Pullman of N.
“But I must say that Alonzo
didn’t seem to mutter any, from all I could
hear. Pathetic, the way that little man will believe
right up to the bitter end. He said that for
a hobo Wilfred wrote very good poetry, better than
most hobos could write, he thought, and that Henrietta
always knew what she was doing. So the evening
come to a peaceful end, most of the men getting back
for their wives and Alonzo showing up in fair shape
and plumb eager for the comfort of his guest.
It was Alonzo’s notion that the guest would
of course want to sleep out in the front yard on the
breast of old earth where he could look up at the pretty
stars and feel at home, and he was getting out a roll
of blankets when the guest said he didn’t want
to make the least bit of trouble and for one night
he’d manage to sleep inside four stifling walls
in a regular bed, like common people do. So Lon
bedded him down in the guest chamber, but opened up
the four windows in it and propped the door wide open
so the poor fellow could have a breeze and not smother.
He told this downtown the next morning, and he was
beginning to look right puzzled indeed. He said
the wayward child of Nature had got up after about
half an hour and shut all the windows and the door.
Lon thought first he was intending to commit suicide,
but he didn’t like to interfere. He was
telling Jeff Tuttle and me about it when we happened
to pass his office.
“‘And there’s another
funny thing,’” he says. ’This
chap was telling us all the way up home last night
that he never ate meat simply fruits and
nuts with a mug of spring water. He said eating
the carcasses of murdered beasts was abhorrent to
him. But when we got down to the table he consented
to partake of the roast beef and he did so repeatedly.
We usually have cold meat for lunch the day after
a rib roast, but there will be something else to-day;
and along with the meat he drank two bottles of beer,
though with mutterings of disgust. He said spring
water in the hills was pure, but that water out of
pipes was full of typhoid germs. He admitted
that there were times when the grosser appetites assailed
him. And they assailed him this morning, too.
He said he might bring himself to eat some chops,
and he did it without scarcely a struggle. He
ate six. He said living the nauseous artificial
life even for one night brought back the hateful meat
craving. I don’t know. He is undeniably
peculiar. And of course you’ve heard about
Pettikin’s affair for this evening?’
“We had. Just before leaving
the house I had received Henrietta’s card inviting
me to the country club that evening ’to meet
Mr. Wilfred Lennox, Poet and Nature Lover, who will
recite his original verses and give a brief talk on
“The World’s Debt to Poetry."’ And
there you have the whole trouble. Henrietta should
have known better. But I’ve let out what
women really are. I told Alonzo I would sure be
among those present, I said it sounded good.
And then Alonzo pipes up about Ben Sutton coming to
town on the eleven forty-two from the West. Ben
makes a trip out of Alaska every summer and never
fails to stop off a day or two with Lon, they having
been partners up North in ’98.
“‘Good old Ben will enjoy
it, too,’ says Alonzo; ’and, furthermore,
Ben will straighten out one or two little things that
have puzzled me about this poet. He will understand
his complex nature in a way that I confess I have
been unequal to. What I mean is,’ he says,
’there was talk when I left this morning of
the poet consenting to take a class in poetry for
several weeks in our thriving little city, and Henrietta
was urging him to make our house his home. I
have a sort of feeling that Ben will be able to make
several suggestions of prime value. I have never
known him to fail at making suggestions.’
“Funny, the way the little man
tried to put it over on us, letting on he was just
puzzled not really bothered, as he plainly
was. You knew Henrietta was still seeing the
big red splash of Romance, behind which the figure
of her husband was totally obscured. Jeff Tuttle
saw the facts, and he up and spoke in a very common
way about what would quickly happen to any tramp that
tried to camp in his house, poet or no poet, but that’s
neither here nor there. We left Alonzo looking
cheerily forward to Ben Sutton on the eleven forty-two,
and I went on to do some errands.
“In the course of these I discovered
that others besides Henrietta had fell hard for the
poet of Nature. I met Mrs. Dr. Percy Hailey Martingale
and she just bubbles about him, she having been at
the Prices’ the night before.
“‘Isn’t he a glorious
thing!’ she says; ’and how grateful we
should be for the dazzling bit of colour he brings
into our drab existence!’ She is a good deal
like that herself at times. And I met Beryl Mae
Macomber, a well known young society girl of seventeen,
and Beryl Mae says: ’He’s awfully
good looking, but do you think he’s sincere?’
And even Mrs. Judge Ballard comes along and says:
’What a stimulus he should be to us in our dull
lives! How he shows us the big, vital bits!’
and her at that very minute going into Bullitt & Fleishacker’s
to buy shoes for her nine year old twin grandsons!
And the Reverend Mrs. Wiley Knapp in at the Racquet
Store wanting to know if the poet didn’t make
me think of some wild, free creature of the woods a
deer or an antelope poised for instant flight while
for one moment he timidly overlooked man in his hideous
commercialism. But, of course, she was a minister’s
wife. I said he made me feel just like that.
I said so to all of ’em. What else could
I say? If I’d said what I thought there
on the street I’d of been pinched. So I
beat it home in self-protection. I was sympathizing
good and hearty with Lon Price by that time and looking
forward to Ben Sutton myself. I had a notion
Ben would see the right of it where these poor dubs
of husbands wouldn’t or wouldn’t
dast say it if they did.
“About five o’clock I
took another run downtown for some things I’d
forgot, with an eye out to see how Alonzo and Ben might
be coming on. The fact is, seeing each other
only once a year that way they’re apt to kind
of loosen up if you know what I mean.
“No sign of ’em at first.
Nothing but ladies young and old even some
of us older ranching set making final purchases
of ribbons and such for the sole benefit of Wilfred
Lennox, and talking in a flushed manner about him
whenever they met. Almost every darned one of
’em had made it a point to stroll past the Price
mansion that afternoon where Wilfred was setting out
on the lawn, in a wicker chair with some bottles of
beer surveying Nature with a look of lofty approval
and chatting with Henrietta about the real things
of life.
“Beryl Mae Macomber had traipsed
past four times, changing her clothes twice with a
different shade of ribbon across her forehead and all
her college pins on, and at last she’d simply
walked right in and asked if she hadn’t left
her tennis racquet there last Tuesday. She says
to Mrs. Judge Ballard and Mrs. Martingale and me in
the Cut-Rate Pharmacy, she says: ’Oh, he’s
just awfully magnetic but do you really
think he’s sincere?’ Then she bought an
ounce of Breath of Orient perfume and kind of two-stepped
out. These other ladies spoke very sharply about
the freedom Beryl Mae’s aunt allowed her.
Mrs. Martingale said the poet, it was true, had a
compelling personality, but what was our young girls
coming to? And if that child was hers
“So I left these two lady highbinders
and went on into the retail side of the Family Liquor
Store to order up some cooking sherry, and there over
the partition from the bar side what do I hear but
Alonzo Price and Ben Sutton! Right off I could
tell they’d been pinning a few on. In fact,
Alonzo was calling the bartender Mister. You don’t
know about Lon, but when he calls the bartender Mister
the ship has sailed. Ten minutes after that he’ll
be crying over his operation. So I thought quick,
remembering that we had now established a grillroom
at the country club, consisting of a bar and three
tables with bells on them, and a Chinaman, and that
if Alonzo and Ben Sutton come there at all they had
better come right at least to start with.
When I’d given my order I sent Louis Meyer in
to tell the two gentlemen a lady wished to speak to
them outside.
“In a minute Ben comes out alone.
He was awful glad to see me and I said how well he
looked, and he did look well, sort of cordial and
bulging his forehead bulges and his eyes
bulge and his moustache and his chin, and he has cushions
on his face. He beamed on me in a wide and hearty
manner and explained that Alonzo refused to come out
to meet a lady until he knew who she was, because
you got to be careful in a small town like this where
every one talks. ‘And besides,’ says
Ben, ’he’s just broke down and begun to
cry about his appendicitis that was three years ago.
He’s leaning his head on his arms down by the
end of the bar and sobbing bitterly over it.
He seems to grieve about it as a personal loss.
I’ve tried to cheer him up and told him it was
probably all for the best, but he says when it comes
over him this way he simply can’t stand it.
And what shall I do?’
“Well, of course I seen the
worst had happened with Alonzo. So I says to
Ben: ’You know there’s a party to-night
and if that man ain’t seen to he will certainly
sink the ship. Now you get him out of that swamp
and I’ll think of something.’ ‘I’ll
do it,’ says Ben, turning sideways so he could
go through the doorway again. ‘I’ll
do it,’ he says, ’if I have to use force
on the little scoundrel.’
“And sure enough, in a minute
he edged out again with Alonzo firmly fastened to
him in some way. Lon hadn’t wanted to come
and didn’t want to stay now, but he simply couldn’t
move. Say, that Ben Sutton would make an awful
grand anchor for a captive balloon. Alonzo wiped
his eyes until he could see who I was. Then I
rebuked him, reminding him of his sacred duties as
a prominent citizen, a husband, and the secretary of
the Red Gap Chamber of Commerce. ’Of course
it’s all right to take a drink now and then,’
I says.
“Alonzo brightened at this.
‘Good!’ says he; ’now it’s
now and pretty soon it will be then. Let’s
go into a saloon or something like that!’
“‘You’ll come with
me,’ I says firmly. And I marched ’em
down to the United States Grill, where I ordered tea
and toast for ’em. Ben was sensible enough,
but Alonzo was horrified at the thought of tea.
’It’s tea or nice cold water for yours,’
I says, and that set him off again. ‘Water!’
he sobs. ’Water! Water! Maybe
you don’t know that some dear cousins of mine
have just lost their all in the Dayton flood twenty
years’ gathering went in a minute, just like
that!’ and he tried to snap his fingers.
All the same I got some hot tea into him and sent for
Eddie Pierce to be out in front with his hack.
While we was waiting for Eddie it occurs to Alonzo
to telephone his wife. He come back very solemn
and says: ’I told her I wouldn’t
be home to dinner because I was hungry and there probably
wouldn’t be enough meat, what with a vegetarian
poet in the house. I told her I should sink to
the level of a brute in the night life of our gay
little city. I said I was a wayward child of Nature
myself if you come right down to it.’
“‘Good for you,’
I says, having got word that Eddie is outside with
his hack. ‘And now for the open road!’
‘Fine!’ says Alonzo. ’My spirit
is certainly feeling very untamed, like some poet’s!’
So I hustled ’em out and into the four wheeler.
Then I give Eddie Pierce private instructions.
’Get ’em out into the hills about four
miles,’ I says, ’out past the Catholic
burying ground, then make an excuse that your hack
has broke down, and as soon as they set foot to the
ground have them skates of yours run away. Pay
no attention whatever to their pleadings or their
profane threats, only yelling to ’em that you’ll
be back as soon as possible. But don’t
go back. They’ll wait an hour or so, then
walk. And they need to walk.’
“‘You said something there,’
says Eddie, glancing back at ’em. Ben Sutton
was trying to cheer Alonzo up by reminding him of the
Christmas night they went to sleep in the steam room
of the Turkish bath at Nome, and the man forgot ’em
and shut off the steam and they froze to the benches
and had to be chiselled off. And Eddie trotted
off with his load. You’d ought to seen
the way the hack sagged down on Ben’s side.
And I felt that I had done a good work, so I hurried
home to get a bite to eat and dress and make the party,
which I still felt would be a good party even if the
husband of our hostess was among the killed or missing.
“I reached the clubhouse at
eight o’clock of that beautiful June evening,
to find the party already well assembled on the piazza
and the front steps or strolling about the lawn, about
eight or ten of our prominent society matrons and
near as many husbands. And mebbe those dames
hadn’t lingered before their mirrors for final
touches! Mrs. Martingale had on all her rings
and the jade bracelet and the art-craft necklace with
amethysts, and Mrs. Judge Ballard had done her hair
a new way, and Beryl Mae Macomber, there with her
aunt, not only had a new scarf with silver stars over
her frail young shoulders and a band of cherry coloured
velvet across her forehead, but she was wearing the
first ankle watch ever seen in Red Gap. I couldn’t
begin to tell you the fussy improvements them ladies
had made in themselves and all, mind you,
for the passing child of Nature who had never paid
a bill for ’em in his life.
“Oh, it was a gay, careless
throng with the mad light of pleasure in its eyes,
and all of ’em milling round Wilfred Lennox,
who was eating it up. Some bantered him roguishly
and some spoke in chest tones of what was the real
inner meaning of life after all. Henrietta Templeton
Price hovered near with the glad light of capture
in her eyes. Silent but proud Henrietta was,
careless but superior, reminding me of the hunter
that has his picture taken over in Africa with one
negligent foot on the head of a two-horned rhinoceros
he’s just killed.
“But again the husbands was
kind of lurking in the background, bunched up together.
They seemed abashed by this strange frenzy of their
womenfolks. How’d they know, the poor dubs,
that a poet wasn’t something a business man
had ought to be polite and grovelling to? They
affected an easy manner, but it was poor work.
Even Judge Ballard, who seems nine feet tall in his
Prince Albert, and usually looks quite dignified and
hostile with his long dark face and his moustache and
goatee even the good old judge was rattled
after a brief and unhappy effort to hold a bit of
converse with the guest of honour. Him and Jeff
Tuttle went to the grillroom twice in ten minutes.
The judge always takes his with a dash of pepper sauce
in it, but now it only seemed to make him more gloomy.
“Well, I was listening along,
feeling elated that I’d put Alonzo and Ben Sutton
out of the way and wondering when the show would begin Beryl
Mae in her high, innocent voice had just said to the
poet: ’But seriously now, are you sincere?’
and I was getting some plenty of that, when up the
road in the dusk I seen Bush Jones driving a dray-load
of furniture. I wondered where in time any family
could be moving out that way. I didn’t
know any houses beyond the club and I was pondering
about this, idly as you might say, when Bush Jones
pulls his team up right in front of the clubhouse,
and there on the load is the two I had tried to lose.
In a big armchair beside a varnished centre table sits
Ben Sutton reading something that I recognized as
the yellow card with Wilfred’s verses on it.
And across the dray from him on a red-plush sofa is
Alonzo Price singing ‘My Wild Irish Rose’
in a very noisy tenor.
“Well, sir, I could have basted
that fool Bush Jones with one of his own dray stakes.
That man’s got an intellect just powerful enough
to take furniture from one house to another if the
new address ain’t too hard for him to commit
to memory. That’s Bush Jones all right!
He has the machinery for thinking, but it all glitters
as new as the day it was put in. So he’d
come a mile out of his way with these two riots and
people off somewhere wondering where that last load
of things was!
“The ladies all affected to
ignore this disgraceful spectacle, with Henrietta
sinking her nails into her bloodless palms, but the
men broke out and cheered a little in a half-scared
manner and some of ’em went down to help the
newcomers climb out. Then Ben had words with Bush
Jones because he wanted him to wait there and take
’em back to town when the party was over and
Bush refused to wait. After suffering about twenty
seconds in the throes of mental effort I reckon he
discovered that he had business to attend to or was
hungry or something. Anyway, Ben paid him some
money finally and he drove off after calling out ’Good-night,
all!’ just as if nothing had happened.
“Alonzo and Ben Sutton joined
the party without further formality. They didn’t
look so bad, either, so I saw my crooked work had done
some good. Lon quit singing almost at once and
walked good and his eyes didn’t wabble, and
he looked kind of desperate and respectable, and Ben
was first-class, except he was slightly oratorical
and his collar had melted the way fat men’s
do. And it was funny to see how every husband
there bucked up when Ben came forward, as if all they
had wanted was some one to make medicine for ’em
before they begun the war dance. They mooched
right up round Ben when he trampled a way into the
flushed group about Wilfred.
“‘At last the well-known
stranger!’ says Ben cordially, seizing one of
Wilfred’s pale, beautiful hands. ’I’ve
been hearing so much of you, wayward child of the
open road that you are, and I’ve just been reading
your wonderful verses as I sat in my library.
The woods and the hills for your spirit untamed and
the fire of youth to warm your nights that’s
the talk.’ He paused and waved Wilfred’s
verses in a fat, freckled hand. Then he looked
at him hard and peculiar and says: ’When
you going to pull some of it for us?’
“Wilfred had looked slightly
rattled from the beginning. Now he smiled, but
only with his lips he made it seem like
a mere Swedish exercise or something, and the next
second his face looked as if it had been sewed up
for the winter.
“’Little starry-eyed gypsy,
I say, when are you going to pull some of that open-road
stuff?’ says Ben again, all cordial and sinister.
“Wilfred gulped and tried to
be jaunty. ’Oh, as to that, I’m here
to-day and there to-morrow,’ he murmurs, and
nervously fixes his necktie.
“‘Oh, my, and isn’t
that nice!’ says Ben heartily ’the
urge of the wild to her wayward child’ I
know you’re a slave to it. And now you’re
going to tell us all about the open road, and then
you and I are going to have an intimate chat and I’ll
tell you about it about some of the dearest
little open roads you ever saw, right round in these
parts. I’ve just counted nine, all leading
out of town to the cunningest mountains and glens
that would make you write poetry hours at a time, with
Nature’s glad fruits and nuts and a mug of spring
water and some bottled beer and a ham and some rump
steak ’
“The stillness of that group
had become darned painful, I want to tell you.
There was a horrid fear that Ben Sutton might go too
far, even for a country club. Every woman was
shuddering and smiling in a painful manner, and the
men regarding Ben with glistening eyes. And Ben
felt it himself all at once. So he says:
‘But I fear I am detaining you,’ and let
go of the end of Wilfred’s tie that he had been
toying with in a somewhat firm manner. ’Let
us be on with your part of the evening’s entertainment,’
he says, ’but don’t forget, gypsy wilding
that you are, that you and I must have a chat about
open roads the moment you have finished. I know
we are cramping you. By that time you will be
feeling the old, restless urge and you might take
a road that wasn’t open if I didn’t direct
you.’
“He patted Wilfred loudly on
the back a couple of times and Wilfred ducked the
third pat and got out of the group, and the ladies
all began to flurry their voices about the lovely
June evening but wouldn’t it be pleasanter inside,
and Henrietta tragically called from the doorway to
come at once, for God’s sake, so they all went
at once, with the men only half trailing, and inside
we could hear ’em fixing chairs round and putting
out a table for the poet to stand by, and so forth.
“Alonzo, however, had not trailed.
He was over on the steps holding Beryl Mae Macomber
by her new scarf and telling her how flowerlike her
beauty was. And old Judge Ballard was holding
about half the men, including Ben Sutton, while he
made a speech. I hung back to listen. ‘Sir,’
he was saying to Ben, ’Secretary Seward some
years since purchased your territory from Russia for
seven million dollars despite the protests of a clamorous
and purblind opposition. How niggardly seems
that purchase price at this moment! For Alaska
has perfected you, sir, if it did not produce you.
Gentlemen, I feel that we dealt unfairly by Russia.
But that is in the dead past. It is not too late,
however, to tiptoe to the grillroom and offer a toast
to our young sister of the snows.’
“There was subdued cheers and
they tiptoed. Ben Sutton was telling the judge
that he felt highly complimented, but it was a mistake
to ring in that snow stuff on Alaska. She’d
suffered from it too long. He was going on to
paint Alaska as something like Alabama cooler
nights, of course, but bracing. Alonzo still
had Beryl Mae by the scarf, telling her how flowerlike
her beauty was.
“I went into the big room, picking
a chair over by the door so I could keep tabs on that
grillroom. Only three or four of the meekest husbands
had come with us. And Wilfred started. I’ll
do him the justice to say he was game. The ladies
thought anything bordering on roughness was all over,
but Wilfred didn’t. When he’d try
to get a far-away look in his eyes while he was reciting
his poetry he couldn’t get it any farther away
than the grillroom door. He was nervous but determined,
for there had been notice given of a silver offering
for him. He recited the verses on the card and
the ladies all thrilled up at once, including Beryl
Mae, who’d come in without her scarf. They
just clenched their hands and hung on Wilfred’s
wild, free words.
“And after the poetry he kind
of lectured about how man had ought to break away
from the vile cities and seek the solace of great Mother
Nature, where his bruised spirit could be healed and
the veneer of civilization cast aside and the soul
come into its own, and things like that. And
he went on to say that out in the open the perspective
of life is broadened and one is a laughing philosopher
as long as the blue sky is overhead and the green
grass underfoot. ‘To lie,’ says he,
’with relaxed muscles on the carpet of pine
needles and look up through the gently swaying branches
of majestic trees at the fleecy white clouds, dreaming
away the hours far from the sordid activities of the
market place, is one of the best nerve tonics in all
the world.’ It was an unfortunate phrase
for Wilfred, because some of the husbands had tiptoed
out of the grillroom to listen, and there was a hearty
cheer at this, led by Jeff Tuttle. ‘Sure!
Some nerve tonic!’ they called out, and laughed
coarsely. Then they rushed back to the grillroom
without tiptoeing.
“The disgraceful interruption
was tactfully covered by Wilfred and his audience.
He took a sip from the glass of water and went on to
talk about the world’s debt to poetry.
Then I sneaked out to the grillroom myself. By
this time the Chinaman had got tangled up with the
orders and was putting out drinks every which way.
And they was being taken willingly. Judge Ballard
and Ben Sutton was now planting cotton in Alaska and
getting good crops every year, and Ben was also promising
to send the judge a lovely spotted fawnskin vest that
an Indian had made for him, but made too small not
having more than six or eight fawns, I judged.
And Alonzo had got a second start. Still he wasn’t
so bad yet, with Beryl Mae’s scarf over his
arm, and talking of the unparalleled beauties of Price’s
Addition to Red Gap, which he said he wouldn’t
trade even for the whole of Alaska if it was offered
to him to-morrow not that Ben Sutton wasn’t
the whitest soul God ever made and he’d like
to hear some one say different and so on.
“I mixed in with ’em and
took a friendly drink myself, with the aim of smoothing
things down, but I saw it would be delicate work.
About all I could do was keep ’em reminded there
was ladies present and it wasn’t a barroom where
anything could be rightly started. Doc Martingale’s
feelings was running high, too, account, I suppose,
of certain full-hearted things his wife had blurted
out to him about the hypnotic eyes of this here Nature
lover. He was quiet enough, but vicious, acting
like he’d love to do some dental work on the
poet that might or might not be painless for all he
cared a hoot. He was taking his own drinks all
alone, like clockwork moody but systematic.
“Then we hear chairs pushed
round in the other room and the chink of silver to
be offered to the poet, and Henrietta come out to give
word for the refreshments to be served. She found
Alonzo in the hallway telling Beryl Mae how flowerlike
her beauty was and giving her the elk’s tooth
charm off his watch chain. Beryl Mae was giggling
heartily until she caught Henrietta’s eye like
a cobra’s.
“The refreshments was handed
round peaceful enough, with the ladies pressing sardine
sandwiches and chocolate cake and cups of coffee on
to Wilfred and asking him interesting questions about
his adventurous life in the open. And the plans
was all made for his class in poetry to be held at
Henrietta’s house, where the lady subscribers
for a few weeks could come into contact with the higher
realities of life, at eight dollars for the course,
and Wilfred was beginning to cheer up again, though
still subject to dismay when one of the husbands would
glare in at him from the hall, and especially when
Ben Sutton would look in with his bulging and expressive
eyes and kind of bark at him.
“Then Ben Sutton come and stood
in the doorway till he caught Wilfred’s eye
and beckoned to him. Wilfred pretended not to
notice the first time, but Ben beckoned a little harder,
so Wilfred excused himself to the six or eight ladies
and went out. It seemed to me he first looked
quick round him to make sure there wasn’t any
other way out. I was standing in the hall when
Ben led him tenderly into the grillroom with two fingers.
“‘Here is our well-known
poet and bon vivant,’ says Ben to Alonzo,
who had followed ’em in. So Alonzo bristles
up to Wilfred and glares at him and says: ’All
joking aside, is that one of my new shirts you’re
wearing or is it not?’
“Wilfred gasped a couple times
and says: ’Why, as to that, you see, the
madam insisted ’
“Alonzo shut him off. ’How
dare you drag a lady’s name into a barroom brawl?’
says he.
“‘Don’t shoot in
here,’ says Ben. ‘You’d scare
the ladies.’
“Wilfred went pasty, indeed,
thinking his host was going to gun him.
“‘Oh, very well, I won’t
then,’ says Alonzo. ’I guess I can
be a gentleman when necessary. But all joking
aside, I want to ask him this: Does he consider
poetry to be an accomplishment or a vice?’
“’I was going to put something
like that to him myself, only I couldn’t think
of it,’ says Doc Martingale, edging up and looking
quite restrained and nervous in the arms. I was
afraid of the doc. I was afraid he was going
to blemish Wilfred a couple of times right there.
“‘An accomplishment or
a vice? Answer yes or no!’ orders the judge
in a hard voice.
“The poet looks round at ’em
and attempts to laugh merrily, but he only does it
from the teeth out.
“‘Laugh on, my proud beauty!’
says Ben Button. Then he turns to the bunch.
‘What we really ought to do,’ he says,
’we ought to make a believer of him right here
and now.’
“Even then, mind you, the husbands
would have lost their nerve if Ben hadn’t took
the lead. Ben didn’t have to live with their
wives so what cared he? Wilfred Lennox sort of
shuffled his feet and smiled a smile of pure anxiety.
He knew some way that this was nothing to cheer about.
“‘I got it,’ says
Jeff Tuttle with the air of a thinker. ’We’re
cramping the poor cuss here. What he wants is
the open road.’
“‘What he really wants,’
says Alonzo, ’is about six bottles of my pure,
sparkling beer, but maybe he’ll take the open
road if we show him a good one.’
“‘He wants the open road show
him a good one!’ yells the other husbands in
chorus. It was kind of like a song.
“‘I had meant to be on
my way,’ says Wilfred very cold and lofty.
“‘You’re here to-day
and there to-morrow,’ says Ben; ’but how
can you be there to-morrow if you don’t start
from here now? for the way is long and
lonely.’
“‘I was about to start,’
says Wilfred, getting in a couple of steps toward
the door.
“‘’Tis better so,’
says Ben. ’This is no place for a county
recorder’s son, and there’s a bully road
out here open at both ends.’
“They made way for the poet,
and a sickening silence reigned. Even the women
gathered about the door of the other room was silent.
They knew the thing had got out of their hands.
The men closed in after Wilfred as he reached the
steps. He there took his soft hat out from under
his coat where he’d cached it. He went
cautiously down the steps. Beryl Mae broke the
silence.
“‘Oh, Mr. Price,’
says she, catching Alonzo by the sleeve, ’do
you think he’s really sincere?’
“‘He is at this moment,’
says Alonzo. ’He’s behaving as sincerely
as ever I saw a man behave.’ And just then
at the foot of the steps Wilfred made a tactical error.
He started to run. The husbands and Ben Sutton
gave the long yell and went in pursuit. Wilfred
would have left them all if he hadn’t run into
the tennis net. He come down like a sack of meal.
“‘There!’ says Ben
Sutton. ’Now he’s done it broke
his neck or something. That’s the way with
some men they’ll try anything to get
a laugh.’
“They went and picked the poet
up. He was all right, only dazed.
“‘But that’s one
of the roads that ain’t open,’ says Ben.
’And besides, you was going right toward the
nasty old railroad that runs into the cramped haunts
of men. You must have got turned round. Here’ he
pointed out over the golf links ’it’s
off that way that Mother Nature awaits her wayward
child. Miles and miles of her all open.
Doesn’t your gypsy soul hear the call?
This way for the hills and glens, thou star-eyed woodling!’
and he gently led Wilfred off over the links, the rest
of the men trailing after and making some word racket,
believe me. They was all good conversationalists
at the moment. Doc Martingale was wanting the
poet to run into the tennis net again, just for fun,
and Jeff Tuttle says make him climb a tree like the
monkeys do in their native glades, but Ben says just
keep him away from the railroad, that’s all.
Good Mother Nature will attend to the rest.
“The wives by now was huddled
round the side of the clubhouse, too scared to talk
much, just muttering incoherently and wringing their
hands, and Beryl Mae pipes up and says: ’Oh,
perhaps I wronged him after all; perhaps deep down
in his heart he was sincere.’
“The moon had come up now and
we could see the mob with its victim starting off
toward the Canadian Rockies. Then all at once
they began to run, and I knew Wilfred had made another
dash for liberty. Pretty soon they scattered
out and seemed to be beating up the shrubbery down
by the creek. And after a bit some of ’em
straggled back. They paid no attention to us
ladies, but made for the grillroom.
“‘We lost him in that
brush beyond the fifth hole,’ says Alonzo.
’None of us is any match for him on level ground,
but we got some good trackers and we’re guarding
the line to keep him headed off from the railroad
and into his beloved hills.’
“‘We should hurry back
with refreshment for the faithful watchers,’
says Judge Ballard. ’The fellow will surely
try to double back to the railroad.’
“‘Got to keep him away
from the cramped haunts of business men,’ says
Alonzo brightly.
“‘I wish Clay, my faithful
old hound, were still alive,’ says the judge
wistfully.
“‘Say, I got a peach of
a terrier down to the house right now,’ says
Jeff Tuttle, ’but he’s only trained for
bear I never tried him on poets.’
“‘He might tree him at that,’ says
Doc Martingale.
“‘Percy,’ cries his wife, ‘have
you forgotten your manhood?’
“‘Yes,’ says Percy.
“‘Darling,’ calls Henrietta, ‘will
you listen to reason a moment?’
“‘No,’ says Alonzo.
“‘It’s that creature
from Alaska leading them on,’ says Mrs. Judge
Ballard ’that overdressed drunken
rowdy!’
“Ben Sutton looked right hurt
at this. He buttoned his coat over his checked
vest and says: ’I take that unkindly, madam calling
me overdressed. I selected this suiting with
great care. It ain’t nice to call me overdressed.
I feel it deeply.’
“But they was off again before
one thing could lead to another, taking bottles of
hard liquor they had uncorked. ’The open
road! The open road!’ they yelled as they
went.
“Well, that’s about all.
Some of the wives begun to straggle off home, mostly
in tears, and some hung round till later. I was
one of these, not wishing to miss anything of an absorbing
character. Edgar Tomlinson went early, too.
Edgar writes ‘The Lounger in the Lobby’
column for the Recorder, and he’d come
out to report the entertainment; but at one o’clock
he said it was a case for the sporting editor and he’d
try to get him out before the kill.
“At different times one or two
of the hunters would straggle back for more drink.
They said the quarry was making a long detour round
their left flank, trying his darndest to get to the
railroad, but they had hopes. And they scattered
out. Ever and anon you would hear the long howl
of some lone drunkard that had got lost from the pack.
“About sunup they all found
themselves at the railroad track about a mile beyond
the clubhouse, just at the head of Stender’s
grade. There they was voting to picket the track
for a mile each way when along come the four-thirty-two
way freight. It had slowed up some making the
grade, and while they watched it what should dart
out from a bunch of scrub oak but the active figure
of Wilfred Lennox. He made one of them iron ladders
all right and was on top of a car when the train come
by, but none of ’em dast jump it because it
had picked up speed again.
“They said Wilfred stood up
and shook both fists at ’em and called ’em
every name he could lay his tongue to using
language so coarse you’d never think it could
have come from a poet’s lips. They could
see his handsome face working violently long after
they couldn’t hear him. Just my luck!
I’m always missing something.
“So they come grouching back
to the clubhouse and I took ’em home to breakfast.
When we got down to the table old Judge Ballard says:
’What might have been an evening of rare enjoyment
was converted into a detestable failure by that cur.
I saw from the very beginning that he was determined
to spoil our fun.’
“‘The joke is sure on
us,’ says Ben Sutton, ’but I bear him no
grudge. In fact, I did him an injustice I knew
he wasn’t a poet, but I didn’t believe
he was even a hobo till he jumped that freight.’
“Alonzo was out in the hall
telephoning Henrietta. We could hear his cheerful
voice: ’No, Pettikins, no! It doesn’t
ache a bit. What’s that? Of course
I still do! You are the only woman that ever meant
anything to me. What? What’s that?
Oh, I may have errant fancies now and again, like
the best of men you know yourself how sensitive
I am to a certain type of flowerlike beauty but
it never touches my deeper nature. Yes, certainly,
I shall be right up the very minute good old Ben leaves to-morrow
or next day. What’s that? Now, now!
Don’t do that! Just the minute he leaves G’ by.’
“And the little brute hung up on her!”