I-
He went late that evening to the Boulevard
Malesherbes, having his impression that it would be
vain to go early, and having also, more than once
in the course of the day, made enquiries of the concierge.
Chad hadn’t come in and had left no intimation;
he had affairs, apparently, at this juncture as
it occurred to Strether he so well might have that
kept him long abroad. Our friend asked once for
him at the hotel in the Rue de Rivoli, but the only
contribution offered there was the fact that every
one was out. It was with the idea that he would
have to come home to sleep that Strether went up to
his rooms, from which however he was still absent,
though, from the balcony, a few moments later, his
visitor heard eleven o’clock strike. Chad’s
servant had by this time answered for his reappearance;
he had, the visitor learned, come quickly in
to dress for dinner and vanish again. Strether
spent an hour in waiting for him an hour
full of strange suggestions, persuasions, recognitions;
one of those that he was to recall, at the end of
his adventure, as the particular handful that most
had counted. The mellowest lamplight and the
easiest chair had been placed at his disposal by Baptiste,
subtlest of servants; the novel half-uncut, the novel
lemon-coloured and tender, with the ivory knife athwart
it like the dagger in a contadina’s hair, had
been pushed within the soft circle a circle
which, for some reason, affected Strether as softer
still after the same Baptiste had remarked that in
the absence of a further need of anything by Monsieur
he would betake himself to bed. The night was
hot and heavy and the single lamp sufficient; the great
flare of the lighted city, rising high, spending itself
afar, played up from the Boulevard and, through the
vague vista of the successive rooms, brought objects
into view and added to their dignity. Strether
found himself in possession as he never yet had been;
he had been there alone, had turned over books and
prints, had invoked, in Chad’s absence, the
spirit of the place, but never at the witching hour
and never with a relish quite so like a pang.
He spent a long time on the balcony;
he hung over it as he had seen little Bilham hang
the day of his first approach, as he had seen Mamie
hang over her own the day little Bilham himself might
have seen her from below; he passed back into the
rooms, the three that occupied the front and that
communicated by wide doors; and, while he circulated
and rested, tried to recover the impression that they
had made on him three months before, to catch again
the voice in which they had seemed then to speak to
him. That voice, he had to note, failed audibly
to sound; which he took as the proof of all the change
in himself. He had heard, of old, only what
he could then hear; what he could do now was to
think of three months ago as a point in the far past.
All voices had grown thicker and meant more things;
they crowded on him as he moved about it
was the way they sounded together that wouldn’t
let him be still. He felt, strangely, as sad
as if he had come for some wrong, and yet as excited
as if he had come for some freedom. But the freedom
was what was most in the place and the hour, it was
the freedom that most brought him round again to the
youth of his own that he had long ago missed.
He could have explained little enough to-day either
why he had missed it or why, after years and years,
he should care that he had; the main truth of the
actual appeal of everything was none the less that
everything represented the substance of his loss put
it within reach, within touch, made it, to a degree
it had never been, an affair of the senses.
That was what it became for him at this singular time,
the youth he had long ago missed a queer
concrete presence, full of mystery, yet full of reality,
which he could handle, taste, smell, the deep breathing
of which he could positively hear. It was in
the outside air as well as within; it was in the long
watch, from the balcony, in the summer night, of the
wide late life of Paris, the unceasing soft quick
rumble, below, of the little lighted carriages that,
in the press, always suggested the gamblers he had
seen of old at Monte Carlo pushing up to the tables.
This image was before him when he at last became
aware that Chad was behind.
“She tells me you put it all
on me” he had arrived after this
promptly enough at that information; which expressed
the case however quite as the young man appeared willing
for the moment to leave it. Other things, with
this advantage of their virtually having the night
before them, came up for them, and had, as well, the
odd effect of making the occasion, instead of hurried
and feverish, one of the largest, loosest and easiest
to which Strether’s whole adventure was to have
treated him. He had been pursuing Chad from
an early hour and had overtaken him only now; but
now the delay was repaired by their being so exceptionally
confronted. They had foregathered enough of course
in all the various times; they had again and again,
since that first night at the theatre, been face to
face over their question; but they had never been
so alone together as they were actually alone their
talk hadn’t yet been so supremely for themselves.
And if many things moreover passed before them, none
passed more distinctly for Strether than that striking
truth about Chad of which he had been so often moved
to take note: the truth that everything came
happily back with him to his knowing how to live.
It had been seated in his pleased smile a
smile that pleased exactly in the right degree as
his visitor turned round, on the balcony, to greet
his advent; his visitor in fact felt on the spot that
there was nothing their meeting would so much do as
bear witness to that facility. He surrendered
himself accordingly to so approved a gift; for what
was the meaning of the facility but that others did
surrender themselves? He didn’t want, luckily,
to prevent Chad from living; but he was quite aware
that even if he had he would himself have thoroughly
gone to pieces. It was in truth essentially by
bringing down his personal life to a function all subsidiary
to the young man’s own that he held together.
And the great point, above all, the sign of how completely
Chad possessed the knowledge in question, was that
one thus became, not only with a proper cheerfulness,
but with wild native impulses, the feeder of his stream.
Their talk had accordingly not lasted three minutes
without Strether’s feeling basis enough for
the excitement in which he had waited. This overflow
fairly deepened, wastefully abounded, as he observed
the smallness of anything corresponding to it on the
part of his friend. That was exactly this friend’s
happy case; he “put out” his excitement,
or whatever other emotion the matter involved, as
he put out his washing; than which no arrangement
could make more for domestic order. It was quite
for Strether himself in short to feel a personal analogy
with the laundress bringing home the triumphs of the
mangle.
When he had reported on Sarah’s
visit, which he did very fully, Chad answered his
question with perfect candour. “I positively
referred her to you told her she must absolutely
see you. This was last night, and it all took
place in ten minutes. It was our first free talk really
the first time she had tackled me. She knew I
also knew what her line had been with yourself; knew
moreover how little you had been doing to make anything
difficult for her. So I spoke for you frankly assured
her you were all at her service. I assured her
I was too,” the young man continued; “and
I pointed out how she could perfectly, at any time,
have got at me. Her difficulty has been simply
her not finding the moment she fancied.”
“Her difficulty,” Strether
returned, “has been simply that she finds she’s
afraid of you. She’s not afraid of me,
Sarah, one little scrap; and it was just because she
has seen how I can fidget when I give my mind to it
that she has felt her best chance, rightly enough to
be in making me as uneasy as possible. I think
she’s at bottom as pleased to have you
put it on me as you yourself can possibly be to put
it.”
“But what in the world, my dear
man,” Chad enquired in objection to this luminosity,
“have I done to make Sally afraid?”
“You’ve been ‘wonderful,
wonderful,’ as we say we poor people
who watch the play from the pit; and that’s
what has, admirably, made her. Made her all the
more effectually that she could see you didn’t
set about it on purpose I mean set about
affecting her as with fear.”
Chad cast a pleasant backward glance
over his possibilities of motive. “I’ve
only wanted to be kind and friendly, to be decent and
attentive and I still only want to be.”
Strether smiled at his comfortable
clearness. “Well, there can certainly
be no way for it better than by my taking the onus.
It reduces your personal friction and your personal
offence to almost nothing.”
Ah but Chad, with his completer conception
of the friendly, wouldn’t quite have this!
They had remained on the balcony, where, after their
day of great and premature heat, the midnight air was
delicious; and they leaned back in turn against the
balustrade, all in harmony with the chairs and the
flower-pots, the cigarettes and the starlight.
“The onus isn’t really yours after
our agreeing so to wait together and judge together.
That was all my answer to Sally,” Chad pursued “that
we have been, that we are, just judging together.”
“I’m not afraid of the
burden,” Strether explained; “I haven’t
come in the least that you should take it off me.
I’ve come very much, it seems to me, to double
up my fore legs in the manner of the camel when he
gets down on his knees to make his back convenient.
But I’ve supposed you all this while to have
been doing a lot of special and private judging about
which I haven’t troubled you; and I’ve
only wished to have your conclusion first from you.
I don’t ask more than that; I’m quite
ready to take it as it has come.”
Chad turned up his face to the sky
with a slow puff of his smoke. “Well, I’ve
seen.”
Strether waited a little. “I’ve
left you wholly alone; haven’t, I think I may
say, since the first hour or two when I
merely preached patience so much as breathed
on you.”
“Oh you’ve been awfully good!”
“We’ve both been good
then we’ve played the game.
We’ve given them the most liberal conditions.”
“Ah,” said Chad, “splendid
conditions! It was open to them, open to them” he
seemed to make it out, as he smoked, with his eyes
still on the stars. He might in quiet sport
have been reading their horoscope. Strether wondered
meanwhile what had been open to them, and he finally
let him have it. “It was open to them simply
to let me alone; to have made up their minds, on really
seeing me for themselves, that I could go on well
enough as I was.”
Strether assented to this proposition
with full lucidity, his companion’s plural pronoun,
which stood all for Mrs. Newsome and her daughter,
having no ambiguity for him. There was nothing,
apparently, to stand for Mamie and Jim; and this added
to our friend’s sense of Chad’s knowing
what he thought. “But they’ve made
up their minds to the opposite that you
can’t go on as you are.”
“No,” Chad continued in
the same way; “they won’t have it for a
minute.”
Strether on his side also reflectively
smoked. It was as if their high place really
represented some moral elevation from which they could
look down on their recent past. “There
never was the smallest chance, do you know, that they
would have it for a moment.”
“Of course not no
real chance. But if they were willing to think
there was !”
“They weren’t willing.”
Strether had worked it all out. “It wasn’t
for you they came out, but for me. It wasn’t
to see for themselves what you’re doing, but
what I’m doing. The first branch of their
curiosity was inevitably destined, under my culpable
delay, to give way to the second; and it’s on
the second that, if I may use the expression and you
don’t mind my marking the invidious fact, they’ve
been of late exclusively perched. When Sarah
sailed it was me, in other words, they were after.”
Chad took it in both with intelligence
and with indulgence. “It is rather
a business then what I’ve let you
in for!”
Strether had again a brief pause;
which ended in a reply that seemed to dispose once
for all of this element of compunction. Chad was
to treat it, at any rate, so far as they were again
together, as having done so. “I was ‘in’
when you found me.”
“Ah but it was you,” the
young man laughed, “who found me.”
“I only found you out.
It was you who found me in. It was all in the
day’s work for them, at all events, that they
should come. And they’ve greatly enjoyed
it,” Strether declared.
“Well, I’ve tried to make them,”
said Chad.
His companion did himself presently
the same justice. “So have I. I tried
even this very morning while Mrs. Pocock
was with me. She enjoys for instance, almost
as much as anything else, not being, as I’ve
said, afraid of me; and I think I gave her help in
that.”
Chad took a deeper interest. “Was she
very very nasty?”
Strether debated. “Well,
she was the most important thing she was
definite. She was at last crystalline.
And I felt no remorse. I saw that they must
have come.”
“Oh I wanted to see them for
myself; so that if it were only for that !”
Chad’s own remorse was as small.
This appeared almost all Strether
wanted. “Isn’t your having seen them
for yourself then the thing, beyond all others,
that has come of their visit?”
Chad looked as if he thought it nice
of his old friend to put it so. “Don’t
you count it as anything that you’re dished if
you are dished? Are you, my dear man, dished?”
It sounded as if he were asking if
he had caught cold or hurt his foot, and Strether
for a minute but smoked and smoked. “I
want to see her again. I must see her.”
“Of course you must.”
Then Chad hesitated. “Do you mean a Mother
herself?”
“Oh your mother that will depend.”
It was as if Mrs. Newsome had somehow
been placed by the words very far off. Chad
however endeavoured in spite of this to reach the place.
“What do you mean it will depend on?”
Strether, for all answer, gave him
a longish look. “I was speaking of Sarah.
I must positively though she quite cast
me off see her again. I can’t
part with her that way.”
“Then she was awfully unpleasant?”
Again Strether exhaled. “She
was what she had to be. I mean that from the
moment they’re not delighted they can only be well
what I admit she was. We gave them,” he
went on, “their chance to be delighted, and
they’ve walked up to it, and looked all round
it, and not taken it.”
“You can bring a horse to water !”
Chad suggested.
“Precisely. And the tune
to which this morning Sarah wasn’t delighted the
tune to which, to adopt your metaphor, she refused
to drink leaves us on that side nothing
more to hope.”
Chad had a pause, and then as if consolingly:
“It was never of course really the least on
the cards that they would be ‘delighted.’”
“Well, I don’t know, after
all,” Strether mused. “I’ve
had to come as far round. However” he
shook it off “it’s doubtless
my performance that’s absurd.”
“There are certainly moments,”
said Chad, “when you seem to me too good to
be true. Yet if you are true,” he added,
“that seems to be all that need concern me.”
“I’m true, but I’m
incredible. I’m fantastic and ridiculous I
don’t explain myself even to myself.
How can they then,” Strether asked, “understand
me? So I don’t quarrel with them.”
“I see. They quarrel,”
said Chad rather comfortably, “with us.”
Strether noted once more the comfort, but his young
friend had already gone on. “I should
feel greatly ashamed, all the same, if I didn’t
put it before you again that you ought to think, after
all, tremendously well. I mean before giving
up beyond recall ” With which insistence,
as from a certain delicacy, dropped.
Ah but Strether wanted it. “Say it all,
say it all.”
“Well, at your age, and with
what when all’s said and done Mother
might do for you and be for you.”
Chad had said it all, from his natural
scruple, only to that extent; so that Strether after
an instant himself took a hand. “My absence
of an assured future. The little I have to show
toward the power to take care of myself. The
way, the wonderful way, she would certainly take care
of me. Her fortune, her kindness, and the constant
miracle of her having been disposed to go even so
far. Of course, of course” he
summed it up. “There are those sharp facts.”
Chad had meanwhile thought of another
still. “And don’t you really care ?”
His friend slowly turned round to him. “Will
you go?”
“I’ll go if you’ll
say you now consider I should. You know,”
he went on, “I was ready six weeks ago.”
“Ah,” said Strether, “that
was when you didn’t know I wasn’t!
You’re ready at present because you do know
it.”
“That may be,” Chad returned;
“but all the same I’m sincere. You
talk about taking the whole thing on your shoulders,
but in what light do you regard me that you think
me capable of letting you pay?” Strether patted
his arm, as they stood together against the parapet,
reassuringly seeming to wish to contend
that he had the wherewithal; but it was again
round this question of purchase and price that the
young man’s sense of fairness continued to hover.
“What it literally comes to for you, if you’ll
pardon my putting it so, is that you give up money.
Possibly a good deal of money.”
“Oh,” Strether laughed,
“if it were only just enough you’d still
be justified in putting it so! But I’ve
on my side to remind you too that you give up
money; and more than ’possibly’ quite
certainly, as I should suppose a good deal.”
“True enough; but I’ve
got a certain quantity,” Chad returned after
a moment. “Whereas you, my dear man, you ”
“I can’t be at all said” Strether
took him up “to have a ‘quantity’
certain or uncertain? Very true. Still,
I shan’t starve.”
“Oh you mustn’t starve!”
Chad pacifically emphasised; and so, in the pleasant
conditions, they continued to talk; though there was,
for that matter, a pause in which the younger companion
might have been taken as weighing again the delicacy
of his then and there promising the elder some provision
against the possibility just mentioned. This,
however, he presumably thought best not to do, for
at the end of another minute they had moved in quite
a different direction. Strether had broken in
by returning to the subject of Chad’s passage
with Sarah and enquiring if they had arrived, in the
event, at anything in the nature of a “scene.”
To this Chad replied that they had on the contrary
kept tremendously polite; adding moreover that Sally
was after all not the woman to have made the mistake
of not being. “Her hands are a good deal
tied, you see. I got so, from the first,”
he sagaciously observed, “the start of her.”
“You mean she has taken so much from you?”
“Well, I couldn’t of course
in common decency give less: only she hadn’t
expected, I think, that I’d give her nearly so
much. And she began to take it before she knew
it.”
“And she began to like it,”
said Strether, “as soon as she began to take
it!”
“Yes, she has liked it also
more than she expected.” After which Chad
observed: “But she doesn’t like me.
In fact she hates me.”
Strether’s interest grew.
“Then why does she want you at home?”
“Because when you hate you want
to triumph, and if she should get me neatly stuck
there she would triumph.”
Strether followed afresh, but looking
as he went. “Certainly in a
manner. But it would scarce be a triumph worth
having if, once entangled, feeling her dislike and
possibly conscious in time of a certain quantity of
your own, you should on the spot make yourself unpleasant
to her.”
“Ah,” said Chad, “she
can bear me could bear me at least
at home. It’s my being there that would
be her triumph. She hates me in Paris.”
“She hates in other words ”
“Yes, that’s it!” Chad
had quickly understood this understanding; which formed
on the part of each as near an approach as they had
yet made to naming Madame de Vionnet. The limitations
of their distinctness didn’t, however, prevent
its fairly lingering in the air that it was this lady
Mrs. Pocock hated. It added one more touch moreover
to their established recognition of the rare intimacy
of Chad’s association with her. He had
never yet more twitched away the last light veil from
this phenomenon than in presenting himself as confounded
and submerged in the feeling she had created at Woollett.
“And I’ll tell you who hates me too,”
he immediately went on.
Strether knew as immediately whom
he meant, but with as prompt a protest. “Ah
no! Mamie doesn’t hate well,”
he caught himself in time “anybody
at all. Mamie’s beautiful.”
Chad shook his head. “That’s
just why I mind it. She certainly doesn’t
like me.”
“How much do you mind it? What would you
do for her?”
“Well, I’d like her if she’d like
me. Really, really,” Chad declared.
It gave his companion a moment’s
pause. “You asked me just now if I don’t,
as you said, ‘care’ about a certain person.
You rather tempt me therefore to put the question
in my turn. Don’t you care about a
certain other person?”
Chad looked at him hard in the lamplight
of the window. “The difference is that
I don’t want to.”
Strether wondered. “‘Don’t want’
to?”
“I try not to that
is I have tried. I’ve done my best.
You can’t be surprised,” the young man
easily went on, “when you yourself set me on
it. I was indeed,” he added, “already
on it a little; but you set me harder. It was
six weeks ago that I thought I had come out.”
Strether took it well in. “But you haven’t
come out!”
“I don’t know it’s
what I want to know,” said Chad. “And
if I could have sufficiently wanted by
myself to go back, I think I might have
found out.”
“Possibly” Strether
considered. “But all you were able to achieve
was to want to want to! And even then,”
he pursued, “only till our friends there came.
Do you want to want to still?” As with a sound
half-dolorous, half-droll and all vague and equivocal,
Chad buried his face for a little in his hands, rubbing
it in a whimsical way that amounted to an evasion,
he brought it out more sharply: “Do
you?”
Chad kept for a time his attitude,
but at last he looked up, and then abruptly, “Jim
is a damned dose!” he declared.
“Oh I don’t ask you to
abuse or describe or in any way pronounce on your
relatives; I simply put it to you once more whether
you’re now ready. You say you’ve
‘seen.’ Is what you’ve seen
that you can’t resist?”
Chad gave him a strange smile the
nearest approach he had ever shown to a troubled one.
“Can’t you make me not resist?”
“What it comes to,” Strether
went on very gravely now and as if he hadn’t
heard him, “what it comes to is that more has
been done for you, I think, than I’ve ever seen
done attempted perhaps, but never so successfully
done by one human being for another.”
“Oh an immense deal certainly” Chad
did it full justice. “And you yourself
are adding to it.”
It was without heeding this either
that his visitor continued. “And our friends
there won’t have it.”
“No, they simply won’t.”
“They demand you on the basis,
as it were, of repudiation and ingratitude; and what
has been the matter with me,” Strether went on,
“is that I haven’t seen my way to working
with you for repudiation.”
Chad appreciated this. “Then
as you haven’t seen yours you naturally haven’t
seen mine. There it is.” After which
he proceeded, with a certain abruptness, to a sharp
interrogation. “Now do you say she
doesn’t hate me?”
Strether hesitated. “’She’ ?”
“Yes Mother. We called it Sarah,
but it comes to the same thing.”
“Ah,” Strether objected, “not to
the same thing as her hating you.”
On which though as if for
an instant it had hung fire Chad remarkably
replied: “Well, if they hate my good friend,
that comes to the same thing.” It
had a note of inevitable truth that made Strether take
it as enough, feel he wanted nothing more. The
young man spoke in it for his “good friend”
more than he had ever yet directly spoken, confessed
to such deep identities between them as he might play
with the idea of working free from, but which at a
given moment could still draw him down like a whirlpool.
And meanwhile he had gone on. “Their hating
you too moreover that also comes to a good
deal.”
“Ah,” said Strether, “your mother
doesn’t.”
Chad, however, loyally stuck to it loyally,
that is, to Strether. “She will if you
don’t look out.”
“Well, I do look out.
I am, after all, looking out. That’s just
why,” our friend explained, “I want to
see her again.”
It drew from Chad again the same question.
“To see Mother?”
“To see for the present Sarah.”
“Ah then there you are!
And what I don’t for the life of me make out,”
Chad pursued with resigned perplexity, “is what
you gain by it.”
Oh it would have taken his companion
too long to say! “That’s because
you have, I verily believe, no imagination. You’ve
other qualities. But no imagination, don’t
you see? at all.”
“I dare say. I do see.”
It was an idea in which Chad showed interest.
“But haven’t you yourself rather too much?”
“Oh rather !”
So that after an instant, under this reproach and
as if it were at last a fact really to escape from,
Strether made his move for departure.
II-
One of the features of the restless
afternoon passed by him after Mrs. Pocock’s
visit was an hour spent, shortly before dinner, with
Maria Gostrey, whom of late, in spite of so sustained
a call on his attention from other quarters, he had
by no means neglected. And that he was still
not neglecting her will appear from the fact that he
was with her again at the same hour on the very morrow with
no less fine a consciousness moreover of being able
to hold her ear. It continued inveterately to
occur, for that matter, that whenever he had taken
one of his greater turns he came back to where she
so faithfully awaited him. None of these excursions
had on the whole been livelier than the pair of incidents the
fruit of the short interval since his previous visit on
which he had now to report to her. He had seen
Chad Newsome late the night before, and he had had
that morning, as a sequel to this conversation, a
second interview with Sarah. “But they’re
all off,” he said, “at last.”
It puzzled her a moment. “All? Mr.
Newsome with them?”
“Ah not yet! Sarah and
Jim and Mamie. But Waymarsh with them for
Sarah. It’s too beautiful,” Strether
continued; “I find I don’t get over that it’s
always a fresh joy. But it’s a fresh joy
too,” he added, “that well,
what do you think? Little Bilham also goes.
But he of course goes for Mamie.”
Miss Gostrey wondered. “‘For’
her? Do you mean they’re already engaged?”
“Well,” said Strether,
“say then for me. He’ll do anything
for me; just as I will, for that matter anything
I can for him. Or for Mamie either.
She’ll do anything for me.”
Miss Gostrey gave a comprehensive
sigh. “The way you reduce people to subjection!”
“It’s certainly, on one
side, wonderful. But it’s quite equalled,
on another, by the way I don’t. I haven’t
reduced Sarah, since yesterday; though I’ve
succeeded in seeing her again, as I’ll presently
tell you. The others however are really all right.
Mamie, by that blessed law of ours, absolutely must
have a young man.”
“But what must poor Mr. Bilham
have? Do you mean they’ll marry for
you?”
“I mean that, by the same blessed
law, it won’t matter a grain if they don’t I
shan’t have in the least to worry.”
She saw as usual what he meant.
“And Mr. Jim? who goes for him?”
“Oh,” Strether had to
admit, “I couldn’t manage that.
He’s thrown, as usual, on the world; the world
which, after all, by his account for he
has prodigious adventures seems very good
to him. He fortunately ’over
here,’ as he says finds the world
everywhere; and his most prodigious adventure of all,”
he went on, “has been of course of the last
few days.”
Miss Gostrey, already knowing, instantly
made the connexion. “He has seen Marie
de Vionnet again?”
“He went, all by himself, the
day after Chad’s party didn’t
I tell you? to tea with her. By her
invitation all alone.”
“Quite like yourself!” Maria smiled.
“Oh but he’s more wonderful
about her than I am!” And then as his friend
showed how she could believe it, filling it out, fitting
it on to old memories of the wonderful woman:
“What I should have liked to manage would have
been her going.”
“To Switzerland with the party?”
“For Jim and for
symmetry. If it had been workable moreover for
a fortnight she’d have gone. She’s
ready” he followed up his renewed
vision of her “for anything.”
Miss Gostrey went with him a minute.
“She’s too perfect!”
“She will, I think,”
he pursued, “go to-night to the station.”
“To see him off?”
“With Chad marvellously as
part of their general attention. And she does
it” it kept before him “with
a light, light grace, a free, free gaiety, that may
well softly bewilder Mr. Pocock.”
It kept her so before him that his
companion had after an instant a friendly comment.
“As in short it has softly bewildered a saner
man. Are you really in love with her?”
Maria threw off.
“It’s of no importance
I should know,” he replied. “It matters
so little has nothing to do, practically,
with either of us.”
“All the same” Maria
continued to smile “they go, the five,
as I understand you, and you and Madame de Vionnet
stay.”
“Oh and Chad.” To which Strether
added: “And you.”
“Ah ’me’!” she
gave a small impatient wail again, in which something
of the unreconciled seemed suddenly to break out.
“I don’t stay, it somehow seems to me,
much to my advantage. In the presence of all
you cause to pass before me I’ve a tremendous
sense of privation.”
Strether hesitated. “But
your privation, your keeping out of everything, has
been hasn’t it? by your
own choice.”
“Oh yes; it has been necessary that
is it has been better for you. What I mean is
only that I seem to have ceased to serve you.”
“How can you tell that?”
he asked. “You don’t know how you
serve me. When you cease ”
“Well?” she said as he dropped.
“Well, I’ll let you know. Be
quiet till then.”
She thought a moment. “Then you positively
like me to stay?”
“Don’t I treat you as if I did?”
“You’re certainly very
kind to me. But that,” said Maria, “is
for myself. It’s getting late, as you
see, and Paris turning rather hot and dusty.
People are scattering, and some of them, in other
places want me. But if you want me here !”
She had spoken as resigned to his
word, but he had of a sudden a still sharper sense
than he would have expected of desiring not to lose
her. “I want you here.”
She took it as if the words were all
she had wished; as if they brought her, gave her something
that was the compensation of her case. “Thank
you,” she simply answered. And then as
he looked at her a little harder, “Thank you
very much,” she repeated.
It had broken as with a slight arrest
into the current of their talk, and it held him a
moment longer. “Why, two months, or whatever
the time was, ago, did you so suddenly dash off?
The reason you afterwards gave me for having kept
away three weeks wasn’t the real one.”
She recalled. “I never
supposed you believed it was. Yet,” she
continued, “if you didn’t guess it that
was just what helped you.”
He looked away from her on this; he
indulged, so far as space permitted, in one of his
slow absences. “I’ve often thought
of it, but never to feel that I could guess it.
And you see the consideration with which I’ve
treated you in never asking till now.”
“Now then why do you ask?”
“To show you how I miss you
when you’re not here, and what it does for me.”
“It doesn’t seem to have
done,” she laughed, “all it might!
However,” she added, “if you’ve
really never guessed the truth I’ll tell it you.”
“I’ve never guessed it,” Strether
declared.
“Never?”
“Never.”
“Well then I dashed off, as
you say, so as not to have the confusion of being
there if Marie de Vionnet should tell you anything
to my detriment.”
He looked as if he considerably doubted.
“You even then would have had to face it on
your return.”
“Oh if I had found reason to
believe it something very bad I’d have left
you altogether.”
“So then,” he continued,
“it was only on guessing she had been on the
whole merciful that you ventured back?”
Maria kept it together. “I
owe her thanks. Whatever her temptation she
didn’t separate us. That’s one of
my reasons,” she went on “for admiring
her so.”
“Let it pass then,” said
Strether, “for one of mine as well. But
what would have been her temptation?”
“What are ever the temptations of women?”
He thought but hadn’t, naturally,
to think too long. “Men?”
“She would have had you, with
it, more for herself. But she saw she could
have you without it.”
“Oh ‘have’ me!”
Strether a trifle ambiguously sighed. “You,”
he handsomely declared, “would have had me at
any rate with it.”
“Oh ‘have’ you!” she
echoed it as he had done. “I do have you,
however,” she less ironically said, “from
the moment you express a wish.”
He stopped before her, full of the
disposition. “I’ll express fifty.”
Which indeed begot in her, with a
certain inconsequence, a return of her small wail.
“Ah there you are!”
There, if it were so, he continued
for the rest of the time to be, and it was as if to
show her how she could still serve him that, coming
back to the departure of the Pococks, he gave her the
view, vivid with a hundred more touches than we can
reproduce, of what had happened for him that morning.
He had had ten minutes with Sarah at her hotel, ten
minutes reconquered, by irresistible pressure, from
the time over which he had already described her to
Miss Gostrey as having, at the end of their interview
on his own premises, passed the great sponge of the
future. He had caught her by not announcing himself,
had found her in her sitting-room with a dressmaker
and a lingère whose accounts she appeared to
have been more or less ingenuously settling and who
soon withdrew. Then he had explained to her
how he had succeeded, late the night before, in keeping
his promise of seeing Chad. “I told her
I’d take it all.”
“You’d ‘take’ it?”
“Why if he doesn’t go.”
Maria waited. “And who
takes it if he does?” she enquired with a certain
grimness of gaiety.
“Well,” said Strether, “I think
I take, in any event, everything.”
“By which I suppose you mean,”
his companion brought out after a moment, “that
you definitely understand you now lose everything.”
He stood before her again. “It does come
perhaps to the same thing.
But Chad, now that he has seen, doesn’t really
want it.”
She could believe that, but she made,
as always, for clearness. “Still, what,
after all, has he seen?”
“What they want of him. And it’s
enough.”
“It contrasts so unfavourably with what Madame
de Vionnet wants?”
“It contrasts just so; all round,
and tremendously.”
“Therefore, perhaps, most of all with what you
want?”
“Oh,” said Strether, “what
I want is a thing I’ve ceased to measure or
even to understand.”
But his friend none the less went
on. “Do you want Mrs. Newsome after
such a way of treating you?”
It was a straighter mode of dealing
with this lady than they had as yet such
was their high form permitted themselves;
but it seemed not wholly for this that he delayed
a moment. “I dare say it has been, after
all, the only way she could have imagined.”
“And does that make you want her any more?”
“I’ve tremendously disappointed
her,” Strether thought it worth while to mention.
“Of course you have. That’s
rudimentary; that was plain to us long ago.
But isn’t it almost as plain,” Maria went
on, “that you’ve even yet your straight
remedy? Really drag him away, as I believe you
still can, and you’d cease to have to count
with her disappointment.”
“Ah then,” he laughed,
“I should have to count with yours!”
But this barely struck her now.
“What, in that case, should you call counting?
You haven’t come out where you are, I think,
to please me.”
“Oh,” he insisted, “that
too, you know, has been part of it. I can’t
separate it’s all one; and that’s
perhaps why, as I say, I don’t understand.”
But he was ready to declare again that this didn’t
in the least matter; all the more that, as he affirmed,
he HADn’t really as yet “come out.”
“She gives me after all, on its coming to the
pinch, a last mercy, another chance. They don’t
sail, you see, for five or six weeks more, and they
haven’t she admits that expected
Chad would take part in their tour. It’s
still open to him to join them, at the last, at Liverpool.”
Miss Gostrey considered. “How
in the world is it ‘open’ unless you open
it? How can he join them at Liverpool if he but
sinks deeper into his situation here?”
“He has given her as
I explained to you that she let me know yesterday his
word of honour to do as I say.”
Maria stared. “But if you say nothing!”
Well, he as usual walked about on
it. “I did say something this morning.
I gave her my answer the word I had promised
her after hearing from himself what he had promised.
What she demanded of me yesterday, you’ll remember,
was the engagement then and there to make him take
up this vow.”
“Well then,” Miss Gostrey
enquired, “was the purpose of your visit to
her only to decline?”
“No; it was to ask, odd as that
may seem to you, for another delay.”
“Ah that’s weak!”
“Precisely!” She had
spoken with impatience, but, so far as that at least,
he knew where he was. “If I am weak
I want to find it out. If I don’t find
it out I shall have the comfort, the little glory,
of thinking I’m strong.”
“It’s all the comfort,
I judge,” she returned, “that you will
have!”
“At any rate,” he said,
“it will have been a month more. Paris
may grow, from day to day, hot and dusty, as you say;
but there are other things that are hotter and dustier.
I’m not afraid to stay on; the summer here
must be amusing in a wild if it isn’t
a tame way of its own; the place at no
time more picturesque. I think I shall like it.
And then,” he benevolently smiled for her, “there
will be always you.”
“Oh,” she objected, “it
won’t be as a part of the picturesqueness that
I shall stay, for I shall be the plainest thing about
you. You may, you see, at any rate,” she
pursued, “have nobody else. Madame de Vionnet
may very well be going off, mayn’t she? and
Mr. Newsome by the same stroke: unless indeed
you’ve had an assurance from them to the contrary.
So that if your idea’s to stay for them” it
was her duty to suggest it “you may
be left in the lurch. Of course if they do stay” she
kept it up “they would be part of
the picturesqueness. Or else indeed you might
join them somewhere.”
Strether seemed to face it as if it
were a happy thought; but the next moment he spoke
more critically. “Do you mean that they’ll
probably go off together?”
She just considered. “I
think it will be treating you quite without ceremony
if they do; though after all,” she added, “it
would be difficult to see now quite what degree of
ceremony properly meets your case.”
“Of course,” Strether
conceded, “my attitude toward them is extraordinary.”
“Just so; so that one may ask
one’s self what style of proceeding on their
own part can altogether match it. The attitude
of their own that won’t pale in its light they’ve
doubtless still to work out. The really handsome
thing perhaps,” she presently threw off, “Would
be for them to withdraw into more secluded conditions,
offering at the same time to share them with you.”
He looked at her, on this, as if some generous irritation all
in his interest had suddenly again flickered
in her; and what she next said indeed half-explained
it. “Don’t really be afraid to tell
me if what now holds you is the pleasant prospect
of the empty town, with plenty of seats in the shade,
cool drinks, deserted museums, drives to the Bois
in the evening, and our wonderful woman all to yourself.”
And she kept it up still more. “The handsomest
thing of all, when one makes it out, would, I
dare say, be that Mr. Chad should for a while go off
by himself. It’s a pity, from that point
of view,” she wound up, “that he doesn’t
pay his mother a visit. It would at least occupy
your interval.” The thought in fact held
her a moment. “Why doesn’t he pay
his mother a visit? Even a week, at this good
moment, would do.”
“My dear lady,” Strether
replied and he had it even to himself surprisingly
ready “my dear lady, his mother has
paid him a visit. Mrs. Newsome has been
with him, this month, with an intensity that I’m
sure he has thoroughly felt; he has lavishly entertained
her, and she has let him have her thanks. Do
you suggest he shall go back for more of them?”
Well, she succeeded after a little
in shaking it off. “I see. It’s
what you don’t suggest what you haven’t
suggested. And you know.”
“So would you, my dear,”
he kindly said, “if you had so much as seen
her.”
“As seen Mrs. Newsome?”
“No, Sarah which,
both for Chad and for myself, has served all the purpose.”
“And served it in a manner,”
she responsively mused, “so extraordinary!”
“Well, you see,” he partly
explained, “what it comes to is that she’s
all cold thought which Sarah could serve
to us cold without its really losing anything.
So it is that we know what she thinks of us.”
Maria had followed, but she had an
arrest. “What I’ve never made out,
if you come to that, is what you think I
mean you personally of her. Don’t
you so much, when all’s said, as care a little?”
“That,” he answered with
no loss of promptness, “is what even Chad himself
asked me last night. He asked me if I don’t
mind the loss well, the loss of an opulent
future. Which moreover,” he hastened to
add, “was a perfectly natural question.”
“I call your attention, all
the same,” said Miss Gostrey, “to the fact
that I don’t ask it. What I venture to
ask is whether it’s to Mrs. Newsome herself
that you’re indifferent.”
“I haven’t been so” he
spoke with all assurance. “I’ve been
the very opposite. I’ve been, from the
first moment, preoccupied with the impression everything
might be making on her quite oppressed,
haunted, tormented by it. I’ve been interested
only in her seeing what I’ve seen.
And I’ve been as disappointed in her refusal
to see it as she has been in what has appeared to
her the perversity of my insistence.”
“Do you mean that she has shocked
you as you’ve shocked her?”
Strether weighed it. “I’m
probably not so shockable. But on the other
hand I’ve gone much further to meet her.
She, on her side, hasn’t budged an inch.”
“So that you’re now at
last” Maria pointed the moral “in
the sad stage of recriminations.”
“No it’s only
to you I speak. I’ve been like a lamb to
Sarah. I’ve only put my back to the wall.
It’s to that one naturally staggers when
one has been violently pushed there.”
She watched him a moment. “Thrown over?”
“Well, as I feel I’ve landed somewhere
I think I must have been thrown.”
She turned it over, but as hoping
to clarify much rather than to harmonise. “The
thing is that I suppose you’ve been disappointing ”
“Quite from the very first of
my arrival? I dare say. I admit I was
surprising even to myself.”
“And then of course,”
Maria went on, “I had much to do with it.”
“With my being surprising ?”
“That will do,” she laughed,
“if you’re too delicate to call it my
being! Naturally,” she added, “you
came over more or less for surprises.”
“Naturally!” he valued the
reminder.
“But they were to have been
all for you” she continued to piece
it out “and none of them for her.”
Once more he stopped before her as
if she had touched the point. “That’s
just her difficulty that she doesn’t
admit surprises. It’s a fact that, I think,
describes and represents her; and it falls in with
what I tell you that she’s all, as
I’ve called it, fine cold thought. She
had, to her own mind, worked the whole thing out in
advance, and worked it out for me as well as for herself.
Whenever she has done that, you see, there’s
no room left; no margin, as it were, for any alteration.
She’s filled as full, packed as tight, as she’ll
hold and if you wish to get anything more or different
either out or in ”
“You’ve got to make over altogether the
woman herself?”
“What it comes to,” said
Strether, “is that you’ve got morally and
intellectually to get rid of her.”
“Which would appear,”
Maria returned, “to be practically what you’ve
done.”
But her friend threw back his head.
“I haven’t touched her. She won’t
be touched. I see it now as I’ve never
done; and she hangs together with a perfection of
her own,” he went on, “that does suggest
a kind of wrong in any change of her composition.
It was at any rate,” he wound up, “the
woman herself, as you call her the whole moral and
intellectual being or block, that Sarah brought me
over to take or to leave.”
It turned Miss Gostrey to deeper thought.
“Fancy having to take at the point of the bayonet
a whole moral and intellectual being or block!”
“It was in fact,” said
Strether, “what, at home, I had done.
But somehow over there I didn’t quite know it.”
“One never does, I suppose,”
Miss Gostrey concurred, “realise in advance,
in such a case, the size, as you may say, of the block.
Little by little it looms up. It has been looming
for you more and more till at last you see it all.”
“I see it all,” he absently
echoed, while his eyes might have been fixing some
particularly large iceberg in a cool blue northern
sea. “It’s magnificent!” he
then rather oddly exclaimed.
But his friend, who was used to this
kind of inconsequence in him, kept the thread.
“There’s nothing so magnificent for
making others feel you as to have no imagination.”
It brought him straight round.
“Ah there you are! It’s what I said
last night to Chad. That he himself, I mean,
has none.”
“Then it would appear,”
Maria suggested, “that he has, after all, something
in common with his mother.”
“He has in common that he makes
one, as you say, ‘feel’ him. And
yet,” he added, as if the question were interesting,
“one feels others too, even when they have plenty.”
Miss Gostrey continued suggestive. “Madame
de Vionnet?”
“She has plenty.”
“Certainly she had
quantities of old. But there are different ways
of making one’s self felt.”
“Yes, it comes, no doubt, to that. You
now ”
He was benevolently going on, but
she wouldn’t have it. “Oh I don’t
make myself felt; so my quantity needn’t be settled.
Yours, you know,” she said, “is monstrous.
No one has ever had so much.”
It struck him for a moment. “That’s
what Chad also thinks.”
“There you are then though it
isn’t for him to complain of it!”
“Oh he doesn’t complain of it,”
said Strether.
“That’s all that would
be wanting! But apropos of what,” Maria
went on, “did the question come up?”
“Well, of his asking me what it is I gain.”
She had a pause. “Then
as I’ve asked you too it settles my case.
Oh you have,” she repeated, “treasures
of imagination.”
But he had been for an instant thinking
away from this, and he came up in another place.
“And yet Mrs. Newsome it’s
a thing to remember has imagined,
did, that is, imagine, and apparently still does, horrors
about what I should have found. I was booked,
by her vision extraordinarily intense,
after all to find them; and that I didn’t,
that I couldn’t, that, as she evidently felt,
I wouldn’t this evidently didn’t
at all, as they say, ‘suit’ her book.
It was more than she could bear. That was her
disappointment.”
“You mean you were to have found Chad himself
horrible?”
“I was to have found the woman.”
“Horrible?”
“Found her as she imagined her.”
And Strether paused as if for his own expression
of it he could add no touch to that picture.
His companion had meanwhile thought.
“She imagined stupidly so it comes
to the same thing.”
“Stupidly? Oh!” said Strether.
But she insisted. “She imagined meanly.”
He had it, however, better. “It couldn’t
but be ignorantly.”
“Well, intensity with ignorance what
do you want worse?”
This question might have held him,
but he let it pass. “Sarah isn’t
ignorant now; she keeps up the theory of
the horrible.”
“Ah but she’s intense and
that by itself will do sometimes as well. If
it doesn’t do, in this case, at any rate, to
deny that Marie’s charming, it will do at least
to deny that she’s good.”
“What I claim is that she’s good for Chad.”
“You don’t claim” she
seemed to like it clear “that she’s
good for you.”
But he continued without heeding.
“That’s what I wanted them to come out
for to see for themselves if she’s
bad for him.”
“And now that they’ve
done so they won’t admit that she’s good
even for anything?”
“They do think,” Strether
presently admitted, “that she’s on the
whole about as bad for me. But they’re
consistent of course, inasmuch as they’ve their
clear view of what’s good for both of us.”
“For you, to begin with” Maria,
all responsive, confined the question for the moment “to
eliminate from your existence and if possible even
from your memory the dreadful creature that I must
gruesomely shadow forth for them, even more than to
eliminate the distincter evil thereby a
little less portentous of the person whose
confederate you’ve suffered yourself to become.
However, that’s comparatively simple.
You can easily, at the worst, after all, give me up.”
“I can easily at the worst,
after all, give you up.” The irony was so
obvious that it needed no care. “I can
easily at the worst, after all, even forget you.”
“Call that then workable.
But Mr. Newsome has much more to forget. How
can he do it?”
“Ah there again we are!
That’s just what I was to have made him do;
just where I was to have worked with him and helped.”
She took it in silence and without
attenuation as if perhaps from very familiarity
with the facts; and her thought made a connexion without
showing the links. “Do you remember how
we used to talk at Chester and in London about my
seeing you through?” She spoke as of far-off
things and as if they had spent weeks at the places
she named.
“It’s just what you are doing.”
“Ah but the worst since
you’ve left such a margin may be still
to come. You may yet break down.”
“Yes, I may yet break down. But will you
take me ?”
He had hesitated, and she waited. “Take
you?”
“For as long as I can bear it.”
She also debated “Mr. Newsome
and Madame de Vionnet may, as we were saying, leave
town. How long do you think you can bear it without
them?”
Strether’s reply to this was
at first another question. “Do you mean
in order to get away from me?”
Her answer had an abruptness.
“Don’t find me rude if I say I should
think they’d want to!”
He looked at her hard again seemed
even for an instant to have an intensity of thought
under which his colour changed. But he smiled.
“You mean after what they’ve done to me?”
“After what she has.”
At this, however, with a laugh, he
was all right again. “Ah but she hasn’t
done it yet!”
III-
He had taken the train a few days
after this from a station as well as to
a station selected almost at random; such
days, whatever should happen, were numbered, and he
had gone forth under the impulse artless
enough, no doubt to give the whole of one
of them to that French ruralism, with its cool special
green, into which he had hitherto looked only through
the little oblong window of the picture-frame.
It had been as yet for the most part but a land of
fancy for him the background of fiction,
the medium of art, the nursery of letters; practically
as distant as Greece, but practically also well-nigh
as consecrated. Romance could weave itself,
for Strether’s sense, out of elements mild enough;
and even after what he had, as he felt, lately “been
through,” he could thrill a little at the chance
of seeing something somewhere that would remind him
of a certain small Lambinet that had charmed him,
long years before, at a Boston dealer’s and that
he had quite absurdly never forgotten. It had
been offered, he remembered, at a price he had been
instructed to believe the lowest ever named for a
Lambinet, a price he had never felt so poor as on
having to recognise, all the same, as beyond a dream
of possibility. He had dreamed had
turned and twisted possibilities for an hour:
it had been the only adventure of his life in connexion
with the purchase of a work of art. The adventure,
it will be perceived, was modest; but the memory,
beyond all reason and by some accident of association,
was sweet. The little Lambinet abode with him
as the picture he would have bought the
particular production that had made him for the moment
overstep the modesty of nature. He was quite
aware that if he were to see it again he should perhaps
have a drop or a shock, and he never found himself
wishing that the wheel of time would turn it up again,
just as he had seen it in the maroon-coloured, sky-lighted
inner shrine of Tremont Street. It would be a
different thing, however, to see the remembered mixture
resolved back into its elements to assist
at the restoration to nature of the whole far-away
hour: the dusty day in Boston, the background
of the Fitchburg Depot, of the maroon-coloured sanctum,
the special-green vision, the ridiculous price, the
poplars, the willows, the rushes, the river, the sunny
silvery sky, the shady woody horizon.
He observed in respect to his train
almost no condition save that it should stop a few
times after getting out of the banlieue; he threw
himself on the general amiability of the day for the
hint of where to alight. His theory of his excursion
was that he could alight anywhere not nearer
Paris than an hour’s run on catching
a suggestion of the particular note required.
It made its sign, the suggestion weather,
air, light, colour and his mood all favouring at
the end of some eighty minutes; the train pulled up
just at the right spot, and he found himself getting
out as securely as if to keep an appointment.
It will be felt of him that he could amuse himself,
at his age, with very small things if it be again
noted that his appointment was only with a superseded
Boston fashion. He hadn’t gone far without
the quick confidence that it would be quite sufficiently
kept. The oblong gilt frame disposed its enclosing
lines; the poplars and willows, the reeds and river a
river of which he didn’t know, and didn’t
want to know, the name fell into a composition,
full of felicity, within them; the sky was silver
and turquoise and varnish; the village on the left
was white and the church on the right was grey; it
was all there, in short it was what he wanted:
it was Tremont Street, it was France, it was Lambinet.
Moreover he was freely walking about in it.
He did this last, for an hour, to his heart’s
content, making for the shady woody horizon and boring
so deep into his impression and his idleness that
he might fairly have got through them again and reached
the maroon-coloured wall. It was a wonder, no
doubt, that the taste of idleness for him shouldn’t
need more time to sweeten; but it had in fact taken
the few previous days; it had been sweetening in truth
ever since the retreat of the Pococks. He walked
and walked as if to show himself how little he had
now to do; he had nothing to do but turn off to some
hillside where he might stretch himself and hear the
poplars rustle, and whence in the course
of an afternoon so spent, an afternoon richly suffused
too with the sense of a book in his pocket he
should sufficiently command the scene to be able to
pick out just the right little rustic inn for an experiment
in respect to dinner. There was a train back
to Paris at 9.20, and he saw himself partaking, at
the close of the day, with the enhancements of a coarse
white cloth and a sanded door, of something fried and
felicitous, washed down with authentic wine; after
which he might, as he liked, either stroll back to
his station in the gloaming or propose for the local
carriole and converse with his driver, a driver who
naturally wouldn’t fail of a stiff clean blouse,
of a knitted nightcap and of the genius of response who,
in fine, would sit on the shafts, tell him what the
French people were thinking, and remind him, as indeed
the whole episode would incidentally do, of Maupassant.
Strether heard his lips, for the first time in French
air, as this vision assumed consistency, emit sounds
of expressive intention without fear of his company.
He had been afraid of Chad and of Maria and of Madame
de Vionnet; he had been most of all afraid of Waymarsh,
in whose presence, so far as they had mixed together
in the light of the town, he had never without somehow
paying for it aired either his vocabulary or his accent.
He usually paid for it by meeting immediately afterwards
Waymarsh’s eye.
Such were the liberties with which
his fancy played after he had turned off to the hillside
that did really and truly, as well as most amiably,
await him beneath the poplars, the hillside that made
him feel, for a murmurous couple of hours, how happy
had been his thought. He had the sense of success,
of a finer harmony in things; nothing but what had
turned out as yet according to his plan. It most
of all came home to him, as he lay on his back on
the grass, that Sarah had really gone, that his tension
was really relaxed; the peace diffused in these ideas
might be delusive, but it hung about him none the less
for the time. It fairly, for half an hour, sent
him to sleep; he pulled his straw hat over his eyes he
had bought it the day before with a reminiscence of
Waymarsh’s and lost himself anew in
Lambinet. It was as if he had found out he was
tired tired not from his walk, but from
that inward exercise which had known, on the whole,
for three months, so little intermission. That
was it when once they were off he had dropped;
this moreover was what he had dropped to, and now he
was touching bottom. He was kept luxuriously
quiet, soothed and amused by the consciousness of
what he had found at the end of his descent.
It was very much what he had told Maria Gostrey he
should like to stay on for, the hugely-distributed
Paris of summer, alternately dazzling and dusky, with
a weight lifted for him off its columns and cornices
and with shade and air in the flutter of awnings as
wide as avenues. It was present to him without
attenuation that, reaching out, the day after making
the remark, for some proof of his freedom, he had gone
that very afternoon to see Madame de Vionnet.
He had gone again the next day but one, and the effect
of the two visits, the after-sense of the couple of
hours spent with her, was almost that of fulness and
frequency. The brave intention of frequency,
so great with him from the moment of his finding himself
unjustly suspected at Woollett, had remained rather
theoretic, and one of the things he could muse about
under his poplars was the source of the special shyness
that had still made him careful. He had surely
got rid of it now, this special shyness; what had become
of it if it hadn’t precisely, within the week,
rubbed off?
It struck him now in fact as sufficiently
plain that if he had still been careful he had been
so for a reason. He had really feared, in his
behaviour, a lapse from good faith; if there was a
danger of one’s liking such a woman too much
one’s best safety was in waiting at least till
one had the right to do so. In the light of the
last few days the danger was fairly vivid; so that
it was proportionately fortunate that the right was
likewise established. It seemed to our friend
that he had on each occasion profited to the utmost
by the latter: how could he have done so more,
he at all events asked himself, than in having immediately
let her know that, if it was all the same to her, he
preferred not to talk about anything tiresome?
He had never in his life so sacrificed an armful
of high interests as in that remark; he had never
so prepared the way for the comparatively frivolous
as in addressing it to Madame de Vionnet’s intelligence.
It hadn’t been till later that he quite recalled
how in conjuring away everything but the pleasant
he had conjured away almost all they had hitherto talked
about; it was not till later even that he remembered
how, with their new tone, they hadn’t so much
as mentioned the name of Chad himself. One of
the things that most lingered with him on his hillside
was this delightful facility, with such a woman, of
arriving at a new tone; he thought, as he lay on his
back, of all the tones she might make possible if
one were to try her, and at any rate of the probability
that one could trust her to fit them to occasions.
He had wanted her to feel that, as he was disinterested
now, so she herself should be, and she had showed
she felt it, and he had showed he was grateful, and
it had been for all the world as if he were calling
for the first time. They had had other, but irrelevant,
meetings; it was quite as if, had they sooner known
how much they really had in common, there were
quantities of comparatively dull matters they might
have skipped. Well, they were skipping them now,
even to graceful gratitude, even to handsome “Don’t
mention it!” and it was amazing what
could still come up without reference to what had
been going on between them. It might have been,
on analysis, nothing more than Shakespeare and the
musical glasses; but it had served all the purpose
of his appearing to have said to her: “Don’t
like me, if it’s a question of liking me, for
anything obvious and clumsy that I’ve, as they
call it, ‘done’ for you: like me well,
like me, hang it, for anything else you choose.
So, by the same propriety, don’t be for me
simply the person I’ve come to know through
my awkward connexion with Chad was ever
anything, by the way, more awkward? Be
for me, please, with all your admirable tact and trust,
just whatever I may show you it’s a present pleasure
to me to think you.” It had been a large
indication to meet; but if she hadn’t met it
what had she done, and how had their time together
slipped along so smoothly, mild but not slow, and
melting, liquefying, into his happy illusion of idleness?
He could recognise on the other hand that he had
probably not been without reason, in his prior, his
restricted state, for keeping an eye on his liability
to lapse from good faith.
He really continued in the picture that
being for himself his situation all the
rest of this rambling day; so that the charm was still,
was indeed more than ever upon him when, toward six
o’clock he found himself amicably engaged with
a stout white-capped deep-voiced woman at the door
of the auberge of the biggest village, a village
that affected him as a thing of whiteness, blueness
and crookedness, set in coppery green, and that had
the river flowing behind or before it one
couldn’t say which; at the bottom, in particular,
of the inn-garden. He had had other adventures
before this; had kept along the height, after shaking
off slumber; had admired, had almost coveted, another
small old church, all steep roof and dim slate-colour
without and all whitewash and paper flowers within;
had lost his way and had found it again; had conversed
with rustics who struck him perhaps a little more as
men of the world than he had expected; had acquired
at a bound a fearless facility in French; had had,
as the afternoon waned, a watery bock, all pale and
Parisian, in the cafe of the furthest village, which
was not the biggest; and had meanwhile not once overstepped
the oblong gilt frame. The frame had drawn itself
out for him, as much as you please; but that was just
his luck. He had finally come down again to the
valley, to keep within touch of stations and trains,
turning his face to the quarter from which he had
started; and thus it was that he had at last pulled
up before the hostess of the Cheval Blanc, who met
him, with a rough readiness that was like the clatter
of sabots over stones, on their common ground
of a côtelette de veau a l’oseille
and a subsequent lift. He had walked many miles
and didn’t know he was tired; but he still knew
he was amused, and even that, though he had been alone
all day, he had never yet so struck himself as engaged
with others and in midstream of his drama. It
might have passed for finished his drama, with its
catastrophe all but reached: it had, however,
none the less been vivid again for him as he thus gave
it its fuller chance. He had only had to be
at last well out of it to feel it, oddly enough, still
going on.
For this had been all day at bottom
the spell of the picture that it was essentially
more than anything else a scene and a stage, that the
very air of the play was in the rustle of the willows
and the tone of the sky. The play and the characters
had, without his knowing it till now, peopled all
his space for him, and it seemed somehow quite happy
that they should offer themselves, in the conditions
so supplied, with a kind of inevitability. It
was as if the conditions made them not only inevitable,
but so much more nearly natural and right as that they
were at least easier, pleasanter, to put up with.
The conditions had nowhere so asserted their difference
from those of Woollett as they appeared to him to
assert it in the little court of the Cheval Blanc
while he arranged with his hostess for a comfortable
climax. They were few and simple, scant and
humble, but they were the thing, as he would
have called it, even to a greater degree than Madame
de Vionnet’s old high salon where the ghost
of the Empire walked. “The” thing
was the thing that implied the greatest number of
other things of the sort he had had to tackle; and
it was queer of course, but so it was the
implication here was complete. Not a single one
of his observations but somehow fell into a place
in it; not a breath of the cooler evening that wasn’t
somehow a syllable of the text. The text was simply,
when condensed, that in these places such things
were, and that if it was in them one elected to move
about one had to make one’s account with what
one lighted on. Meanwhile at all events it was
enough that they did affect one so far
as the village aspect was concerned as whiteness,
crookedness and blueness set in coppery green; there
being positively, for that matter, an outer wall of
the White Horse that was painted the most improbable
shade. That was part of the amusement as
if to show that the fun was harmless; just as it was
enough, further, that the picture and the play seemed
supremely to melt together in the good woman’s
broad sketch of what she could do for her visitor’s
appetite. He felt in short a confidence, and
it was general, and it was all he wanted to feel.
It suffered no shock even on her mentioning that she
had in fact just laid the cloth for two persons who,
unlike Monsieur, had arrived by the river in
a boat of their own; who had asked her, half an hour
before, what she could do for them, and had then paddled
away to look at something a little further up from
which promenade they would presently return.
Monsieur might meanwhile, if he liked, pass into the
garden, such as it was, where she would serve him,
should he wish it for there were tables
and benches in plenty a “bitter”
before his repast. Here she would also report
to him on the possibility of a conveyance to his station,
and here at any rate he would have the agrément
of the river.
It may be mentioned without delay
that Monsieur had the agrément of everything,
and in particular, for the next twenty minutes, of
a small and primitive pavilion that, at the garden’s
edge, almost overhung the water, testifying, in its
somewhat battered state, to much fond frequentation.
It consisted of little more than a platform, slightly
raised, with a couple of benches and a table, a protecting
rail and a projecting roof; but it raked the full
grey-blue stream, which, taking a turn a short distance
above, passed out of sight to reappear much higher
up; and it was clearly in esteemed requisition for
Sundays and other feasts. Strether sat there
and, though hungry, felt at peace; the confidence
that had so gathered for him deepened with the lap
of the water, the ripple of the surface, the rustle
of the reeds on the opposite bank, the faint diffused
coolness and the slight rock of a couple of small
boats attached to a rough landing-place hard by.
The valley on the further side was all copper-green
level and glazed pearly sky, a sky hatched across
with screens of trimmed trees, which looked flat,
like espaliers; and though the rest of the village
straggled away in the near quarter the view had an
emptiness that made one of the boats suggestive.
Such a river set one afloat almost before one could
take up the oars the idle play of which
would be moreover the aid to the full impression.
This perception went so far as to bring him to his
feet; but that movement, in turn, made him feel afresh
that he was tired, and while he leaned against a post
and continued to look out he saw something that gave
him a sharper arrest.
IV-
What he saw was exactly the right
thing a boat advancing round the bend and
containing a man who held the paddles and a lady, at
the stern, with a pink parasol. It was suddenly
as if these figures, or something like them, had been
wanted in the picture, had been wanted more or less
all day, and had now drifted into sight, with the slow
current, on purpose to fill up the measure. They
came slowly, floating down, evidently directed to
the landing-place near their spectator and presenting
themselves to him not less clearly as the two persons
for whom his hostess was already preparing a meal.
For two very happy persons he found himself straightway
taking them a young man in shirt-sleeves,
a young woman easy and fair, who had pulled pleasantly
up from some other place and, being acquainted with
the neighbourhood, had known what this particular
retreat could offer them. The air quite thickened,
at their approach, with further intimations; the intimation
that they were expert, familiar, frequent that
this wouldn’t at all events be the first time.
They knew how to do it, he vaguely felt and
it made them but the more idyllic, though at the very
moment of the impression, as happened, their boat
seemed to have begun to drift wide, the oarsman letting
it go. It had by this time none the less come
much nearer near enough for Strether to
dream the lady in the stern had for some reason taken
account of his being there to watch them. She
had remarked on it sharply, yet her companion hadn’t
turned round; it was in fact almost as if our friend
had felt her bid him keep still. She had taken
in something as a result of which their course had
wavered, and it continued to waver while they just
stood off. This little effect was sudden and
rapid, so rapid that Strether’s sense of it
was separate only for an instant from a sharp start
of his own. He too had within the minute taken
in something, taken in that he knew the lady whose
parasol, shifting as if to hide her face, made so fine
a pink point in the shining scene. It was too
prodigious, a chance in a million, but, if he knew
the lady, the gentleman, who still presented his back
and kept off, the gentleman, the coatless hero of the
idyll, who had responded to her start, was, to match
the marvel, none other than Chad.
Chad and Madame de Vionnet were then
like himself taking a day in the country though
it was as queer as fiction, as farce, that their country
could happen to be exactly his; and she had been the
first at recognition, the first to feel, across the
water, the shock for it appeared to come
to that of their wonderful accident.
Strether became aware, with this, of what was taking
place that her recognition had been even
stranger for the pair in the boat, that her immediate
impulse had been to control it, and that she was quickly
and intensely debating with Chad the risk of betrayal.
He saw they would show nothing if they could feel
sure he hadn’t made them out; so that he had
before him for a few seconds his own hesitation.
It was a sharp fantastic crisis that had popped up
as if in a dream, and it had had only to last the few
seconds to make him feel it as quite horrible.
They were thus, on either side, trying the other
side, and all for some reason that broke the stillness
like some unprovoked harsh note. It seemed to
him again, within the limit, that he had but one thing
to do to settle their common question by
some sign of surprise and joy. He hereupon gave
large play to these things, agitating his hat and his
stick and loudly calling out a demonstration
that brought him relief as soon as he had seen it
answered. The boat, in mid-stream, still went
a little wild which seemed natural, however,
while Chad turned round, half springing up; and his
good friend, after blankness and wonder, began gaily
to wave her parasol. Chad dropped afresh to his
paddles and the boat headed round, amazement and pleasantry
filling the air meanwhile, and relief, as Strether
continued to fancy, superseding mere violence.
Our friend went down to the water under this odd impression
as of violence averted the violence of
their having “cut” him, out there in the
eye of nature, on the assumption that he wouldn’t
know it. He awaited them with a face from which
he was conscious of not being able quite to banish
this idea that they would have gone on, not seeing
and not knowing, missing their dinner and disappointing
their hostess, had he himself taken a line to match.
That at least was what darkened his vision for the
moment. Afterwards, after they had bumped at
the landing-place and he had assisted their getting
ashore, everything found itself sponged over by the
mere miracle of the encounter.
They could so much better at last,
on either side, treat it as a wild extravagance of
hazard, that the situation was made elastic by the
amount of explanation called into play. Why indeed apart
from oddity the situation should have been
really stiff was a question naturally not practical
at the moment, and in fact, so far as we are concerned,
a question tackled, later on and in private, only by
Strether himself. He was to reflect later on
and in private that it was mainly he who had
explained as he had had moreover comparatively
little difficulty in doing. He was to have at
all events meanwhile the worrying thought of their
perhaps secretly suspecting him of having plotted
this coincidence, taking such pains as might be to
give it the semblance of an accident. That possibility as
their imputation didn’t of course
bear looking into for an instant; yet the whole incident
was so manifestly, arrange it as they would, an awkward
one, that he could scarce keep disclaimers in respect
to his own presence from rising to his lips.
Disclaimers of intention would have been as tactless
as his presence was practically gross; and the narrowest
escape they either of them had was his lucky escape,
in the event, from making any. Nothing of the
sort, so far as surface and sound were involved, was
even in question; surface and sound all made for their
common ridiculous good fortune, for the general invraisemblance
of the occasion, for the charming chance that they
had, the others, in passing, ordered some food to
be ready, the charming chance that he had himself
not eaten, the charming chance, even more, that their
little plans, their hours, their train, in short, from
la-bas, would all match for their return together to
Paris. The chance that was most charming of
all, the chance that drew from Madame de Vionnet her
clearest, gayest “Comme cela se
trouve!” was the announcement made to Strether
after they were seated at table, the word given him
by their hostess in respect to his carriage for the
station, on which he might now count. It settled
the matter for his friends as well; the conveyance it
was all too lucky! would serve for
them; and nothing was more delightful than his being
in a position to make the train so definite.
It might have been, for themselves to hear
Madame de Vionnet almost unnaturally vague,
a detail left to be fixed; though Strether indeed
was afterwards to remember that Chad had promptly
enough intervened to forestall this appearance, laughing
at his companion’s flightiness and making the
point that he had after all, in spite of the bedazzlement
of a day out with her, known what he was about.
Strether was to remember afterwards
further that this had had for him the effect of forming
Chad’s almost sole intervention; and indeed he
was to remember further still, in subsequent meditation,
many things that, as it were, fitted together.
Another of them was for instance that the wonderful
woman’s overflow of surprise and amusement was
wholly into French, which she struck him as speaking
with an unprecedented command of idiomatic turns,
but in which she got, as he might have said, somewhat
away from him, taking all at once little brilliant
jumps that he could but lamely match. The question
of his own French had never come up for them; it was
the one thing she wouldn’t have permitted it
belonged, for a person who had been through much,
to mere boredom; but the present result was odd, fairly
veiling her identity, shifting her back into a mere
voluble class or race to the intense audibility of
which he was by this time inured. When she spoke
the charming slightly strange English he best knew
her by he seemed to feel her as a creature, among
all the millions, with a language quite to herself,
the real monopoly of a special shade of speech, beautifully
easy for her, yet of a colour and a cadence that were
both inimitable and matters of accident. She
came back to these things after they had shaken down
in the inn-parlour and knew, as it were, what was
to become of them; it was inevitable that loud ejaculation
over the prodigy of their convergence should at last
wear itself out. Then it was that his impression
took fuller form the impression, destined
only to deepen, to complete itself, that they had
something to put a face upon, to carry off and make
the best of, and that it was she who, admirably on
the whole, was doing this. It was familiar to
him of course that they had something to put a face
upon; their friendship, their connexion, took any
amount of explaining that would have been
made familiar by his twenty minutes with Mrs. Pocock
if it hadn’t already been so. Yet his
theory, as we know, had bountifully been that the
facts were specifically none of his business, and were,
over and above, so far as one had to do with them,
intrinsically beautiful; and this might have prepared
him for anything, as well as rendered him proof against
mystification. When he reached home that night,
however, he knew he had been, at bottom, neither prepared
nor proof; and since we have spoken of what he was,
after his return, to recall and interpret, it may
as well immediately be said that his real experience
of these few hours put on, in that belated vision for
he scarce went to bed till morning the
aspect that is most to our purpose.
He then knew more or less how he had
been affected he but half knew at the time.
There had been plenty to affect him even after, as
has been said, they had shaken down; for his consciousness,
though muffled, had its sharpest moments during this
passage, a marked drop into innocent friendly Bohemia.
They then had put their elbows on the table, deploring
the premature end of their two or three dishes; which
they had tried to make up with another bottle while
Chad joked a little spasmodically, perhaps even a
little irrelevantly, with the hostess. What it
all came to had been that fiction and fable were,
inevitably, in the air, and not as a simple term of
comparison, but as a result of things said; also that
they were blinking it, all round, and that they yet
needn’t, so much as that, have blinked it though
indeed if they hadn’t Strether didn’t
quite see what else they could have done. Strether
didn’t quite see that even at an hour or
two past midnight, even when he had, at his hotel,
for a long time, without a light and without undressing,
sat back on his bedroom sofa and stared straight before
him. He was, at that point of vantage, in full
possession, to make of it all what he could.
He kept making of it that there had been simply a
lie in the charming affair a lie on
which one could now, detached and deliberate, perfectly
put one’s finger. It was with the lie
that they had eaten and drunk and talked and laughed,
that they had waited for their carriole rather impatiently,
and had then got into the vehicle and, sensibly subsiding,
driven their three or four miles through the darkening
summer night. The eating and drinking, which
had been a resource, had had the effect of having
served its turn; the talk and laughter had done as
much; and it was during their somewhat tedious progress
to the station, during the waits there, the further
delays, their submission to fatigue, their silences
in the dim compartment of the much-stopping train,
that he prepared himself for réflexions to come.
It had been a performance, Madame de Vionnet’s
manner, and though it had to that degree faltered
toward the end, as through her ceasing to believe
in it, as if she had asked herself, or Chad had found
a moment surreptitiously to ask her, what after all
was the use, a performance it had none the less quite
handsomely remained, with the final fact about it
that it was on the whole easier to keep up than to
abandon.
From the point of view of presence
of mind it had been very wonderful indeed, wonderful
for readiness, for beautiful assurance, for the way
her decision was taken on the spot, without time to
confer with Chad, without time for anything.
Their only conference could have been the brief instants
in the boat before they confessed to recognising the
spectator on the bank, for they hadn’t been alone
together a moment since and must have communicated
all in silence. It was a part of the deep impression
for Strether, and not the least of the deep interest,
that they could so communicate that
Chad in particular could let her know he left it to
her. He habitually left things to others, as
Strether was so well aware, and it in fact came over
our friend in these meditations that there had been
as yet no such vivid illustration of his famous knowing
how to live. It was as if he had humoured her
to the extent of letting her lie without correction almost
as if, really, he would be coming round in the morning
to set the matter, as between Strether and himself,
right. Of course he couldn’t quite come;
it was a case in which a man was obliged to accept
the woman’s version, even when fantastic; if
she had, with more flurry than she cared to show,
elected, as the phrase was, to represent that they
had left Paris that morning, and with no design but
of getting back within the day if she had
so sized-up, in the Woollett phrase, their necessity,
she knew best her own measure. There were things,
all the same, it was impossible to blink and which
made this measure an odd one the too evident
fact for instance that she hadn’t started out
for the day dressed and hatted and shod, and even,
for that matter, pink parasol’d, as she had been
in the boat. From what did the drop in her assurance
proceed as the tension increased from what
did this slightly baffled ingenuity spring but from
her consciousness of not presenting, as night closed
in, with not so much as a shawl to wrap her round,
an appearance that matched her story? She admitted
that she was cold, but only to blame her imprudence
which Chad suffered her to give such account of as
she might. Her shawl and Chad’s overcoat
and her other garments, and his, those they had each
worn the day before, were at the place, best known
to themselves a quiet retreat enough, no
doubt at which they had been spending the
twenty-four hours, to which they had fully meant to
return that evening, from which they had so remarkably
swum into Strether’s ken, and the tacit repudiation
of which had been thus the essence of her comedy.
Strether saw how she had perceived in a flash that
they couldn’t quite look to going back there
under his nose; though, honestly, as he gouged deeper
into the matter, he was somewhat surprised, as Chad
likewise had perhaps been, at the uprising of this
scruple. He seemed even to divine that she had
entertained it rather for Chad than for herself, and
that, as the young man had lacked the chance to enlighten
her, she had had to go on with it, he meanwhile mistaking
her motive.
He was rather glad, none the less,
that they had in point of fact not parted at the Cheval
Blanc, that he hadn’t been reduced to giving
them his blessing for an idyllic retreat down the
river. He had had in the actual case to make-believe
more than he liked, but this was nothing, it struck
him, to what the other event would have required.
Could he, literally, quite have faced the other event?
Would he have been capable of making the best of
it with them? This was what he was trying to
do now; but with the advantage of his being able to
give more time to it a good deal counteracted by his
sense of what, over and above the central fact itself,
he had to swallow. It was the quantity of make-believe
involved and so vividly exemplified that most disagreed
with his spiritual stomach. He moved, however,
from the consideration of that quantity to
say nothing of the consciousness of that organ back
to the other feature of the show, the deep, deep truth
of the intimacy revealed. That was what, in
his vain vigil, he oftenest reverted to: intimacy,
at such a point, was like that and
what in the world else would one have wished it to
be like? It was all very well for him to feel
the pity of its being so much like lying; he almost
blushed, in the dark, for the way he had dressed the
possibility in vagueness, as a little girl might have
dressed her doll. He had made them and
by no fault of their own momentarily pull
it for him, the possibility, out of this vagueness;
and must he not therefore take it now as they had
had simply, with whatever thin atténuations, to
give it to him? The very question, it may be
added, made him feel lonely and cold. There
was the element of the awkward all round, but Chad
and Madame de Vionnet had at least the comfort that
they could talk it over together. With whom
could he talk of such things? unless
indeed always, at almost any stage, with Maria?
He foresaw that Miss Gostrey would come again into
requisition on the morrow; though it wasn’t to
be denied that he was already a little afraid of her
“What on earth that’s what
I want to know now had you then supposed?”
He recognised at last that he had really been trying
all along to suppose nothing. Verily, verily,
his labour had been lost. He found himself supposing
innumerable and wonderful things.