MORE HELP FROM MR. KEEFER--OFF TO SEE MY GIRL--EMBARKED IN THE
AGRICULTURAL-IMPLEMENT BUSINESS WITHOUT CAPITAL--MARRIED--SOLD OUT--IN
THE GROCERY BUSINESS--COLLAPSED--RUNNING A BILLIARD HALL--COLLAPSED
AGAIN--NEWSPAPER REPORTER FOR A MYSTERIOUS MURDER.
The next day I called Mr. Keefer to
one side, informed him on the quiet about
my shortage of seventy-five dollars and suggested going
to the bank and borrowing about a hundred dollars,
as it would be necessary for me to have a few dollars
to “sort of bridge me over” till I could
get on my feet again. He said he guessed that
would be all right, so we borrowed the money.
The next day I received a very affectionate
letter from my girl and started forthwith for Michigan,
arriving there in time to escort her to the last and
grandest ball of the season, at an expense of more
than half the amount of my last loan.
I was very anxious to get married
at once, but being a little short financially, concluded
to postpone it a few days at least. A couple of
days later I received a letter from my uncle, A. S.
Johnston, who was then living at Three Rivers, Michigan,
and who had previously started me in the fruit business
in Chicago. He informed me that he was general
agent in Southern Michigan for C. H. & L. J. McCormick’s
reapers and mowers, and if I would come there he would
make me their local agent at that place.
Bidding my girl an affectionate farewell
I departed, and arrived at my uncle’s with forty
cents in cash and six dirty shirts.
On my way there I fell in company
with two gentlemen traveling together, one of whom
was selling horse-rakes and the other threshing-machines.
I explained to them that I was on
my way to Three Rivers, where I expected to become
an agent for my uncle. They then remembered having
met him somewhere on the road, and one of them suggested
that I might also be able to sell horse-rakes and
threshing-machines. I told them I had thought
some of putting in a few later on. They then became
anxious to have me take the agency for their implements,
but as I had in my mind the goods of other manufacturers
which I believed had a better reputation, I hesitated
about handling theirs.
They became very much interested and
urged me to let them send on consignment a car-load
of horse-rakes and four threshing-machines. I
finally consented on condition that they prepay the
freight, which they agreed to do.
I informed my uncle of my intentions
of starting in the agricultural-implement business.
He asked how I expected to do so on forty cents capital.
I answered that all I needed was a
sign over some good shed, and a boarding house where
they would be willing to wait till after harvest for
their pay.
Sign-painting had been his trade,
so he said he would furnish the sign, and I could
live with them until I got returns.
That afternoon I arranged to have
the use of a vacant lot which was in a good locality,
and as soon as possible erected a sign as large as
the broad-side of a barn, which read as follows:
“J.
P. JOHNSTON, DEALER IN ALL
KINDS OF AGRICULTURAL IMPLEMENTS.
C. H. & L. J. McCORMICK’S
REAPERS AND MOWERS FOR SALE.”
In less than two months I had several
thousand dollars’ worth of all kinds of implements,
which had been consigned to me, freight prepaid.
I very soon made the acquaintance
of a young man who owned a good horse, which he kindly
offered to loan me to canvass the farmers with.
I then began looking about to find some one who would
loan me a harness and carriage, when my attention
was called to the advertisement of a lot of carriages
to be sold at auction that very day. I called
on the owner and told him I needed a carriage, and
asked what the terms of the sale would be.
He said a note payable in one year,
would be acceptable from responsible parties, and
then asked my name. I said: “I am J.
P. Johnston, the agricultural man.”
“What! the man with the big sign across the
street?”
I replied: “The same.”
“O, well,” he said, “your note is
good.”
I bid in a fine carriage, giving my
note, which, by the way, was paid in less than six
months. I then borrowed a harness and began a
general raid on the farmers, and succeeded fairly
well.
The only unpleasantness I experienced
in the sale of implements was that of a check-row
corn-planter, which was new to the farmers in that
section as well as to myself. I, of course, assumed
to know all about it, when in fact, I was unable to
in the least comprehend the method of operating it,
even after studying the directions carefully, and
committing them to memory so as to give a glowing description
of it and its great advantages.
One day a farmer came driving up to
my “office” in a great hurry and informed
me of his intention to buy a corn-planter, and stated
that he had a piece of ground all prepared, and asked
me to go and show him “how the thing worked.”
Of course there was nothing else for me to do but to
go. So we loaded one on to the wagon and started.
Arriving at the farm we hitched one
of the old mares on and started for the field, when
I very soon learned that the farmer had a much better
idea of the “machine” than I did.
But in order to make him conscious of my importance
it was necessary for me to oppose him in many things,
some of which were no doubt injurious to the job.
After he had set the stakes and drawn
the line across the field, we were ready for a start.
I was to hold the “machine,” and he to
drive the horse. As we were about to start he
suggested that I had better take off my coat, vest,
boots and stockings, and roll up my pants. I did
so.
The wisdom of this move will be seen
later. The old mare started on a gait equal to
that of the “deaf drover” over the rough
roads. I held tight to the handles, making lofty
jumps from one step to another, sinking into the plowed
ground almost to my knees each time. Before we
were half through the field I was in a profuse perspiration,
and had succeeded in knocking one of my great toe-nails
entirely off, which afterwards laid me up for two
weeks. When we reached the other end he looked
solemnly at me and said: “By gosh! you can
run like a racehorse can’t you?”
“Yes,” I replied, almost
out of breath, “and you are no slouch yourself.”
I then took a comfortable seat on
a fence-rail and asked him if that was the fastest
horse he owned. He answered: “No, by
gosh, I own one that can out-trot this one.”
“Yes,” I said, “but
trotters won’t do here. We must have a running
horse to do this right.”
After skimming over a couple of acres
which took but a few minutes, we concluded to make
an investigation to see how evenly the kernels were
being distributed.
Although it seemed to us that we were
using up a large quantity of corn we found but few
hills containing more than the average number of kernels.
Of course we only examined along the
line opposite each check, having no thought of finding
any corn between them.
I then suggested that he finish it
alone, as I must return to town to attend to important
business.
This he agreed to and I left at once.
In about ten days he drove up in front of the office
and beckoned me out, when he said:
“Get in here young man, I want to show you something.”
I climbed in the wagon and he started for home.
On the way he asked me how long I
had been in that business, adding that he “didn’t
suppose I had ever worked in a shop where they made
corn-planters.”
I assured him that my time had always been too valuable
for that.
He said he “supposed so.”
When we arrived at the corn-field he drew a long breath
and said:
“Now sir, you have done a deal
of blowing about your old check-row corn-planters.
As you see, this corn is high enough to judge, and
if you can find a single row in this whole field,
I’ll buy you out.”
I admitted that there were no rows,
and said to him in a confidential way: “My
dear sir, I supposed you understood that this machine
was intended to sow broadcast.”
“Broadcast the dl!”
he replied, and flew into a rage, declaring he would
sue me for damages. I then said to him as I motioned
towards the house: “Come inside, I want
to show you something.”
He followed me in, and I took an old
slipper and a woolen sock off my foot, and without
unwrapping the toe, said, pointing to it: “Sir,
if I have that toe taken off, I shall be obliged to
compel you to pay for it.”
His wife, a silly-looking mortal,
stared vacantly for a moment and then said: “I
can’t see what use he would have for the toe,
if you did have it taken off.”
We then compromised, he agreeing to
stand the results of the corn crop, and I the consequences
of the sore toe. As soon as a new nail grew out,
I made a trip through the country, and brought up one
Saturday evening at Bronson, where “my girl”
lived.
I couldn’t give up the idea
of getting married, and as my prospective mother-in-law
quite agreed with me that it would be the best thing
to do, we lost no time in arranging matters.
The marriage took place the following week, and I
immediately returned to Three Rivers with my bride.
We remained but a short time, until
my uncle expressed a desire to become interested in
the business. I then turned it all over to him,
as I felt it was too slow to suit me. I had been
there six months, and left with about that many hundred
dollars.
We proceeded to Ohio, and explained
to my folks “just how it all happened.”
My mother said “she couldn’t see how I
had managed to live so long without a wife.”
Mr. Keefer said “he’d bet it was the best
thing that ever happened to me.”
My mother wanted to know what next,
and how I expected to support a wife and pay my debts,
when I had never yet shown enough ability to support
myself?
I frankly confessed that during my
courtship I absolutely forgot that I owed any one,
and that it seemed to have been a secondary consideration
with me.
However, I called on all my creditors,
and, after showing them a nice roll of money as evidence
that I had been “hus’ling,” I received
their sanction to my investing the money in jewelry,
and going on the road as a wholesaler. I then
opened correspondence with a firm in Chicago who had
been recommended to me as headquarters on jewelry,
arranging to call on them in a few days. They
informed me that five hundred dollars would buy a
fair stock, to start with.
We returned to the home of my wife’s
parents; and the day before I was to start for Chicago,
her father, who was engaged in the grocery business,
called me one side and explained that he had become
involved, and that the money I had would bridge him
over; and if I would put it in his business and help
him run it he would give me half the profits and board
myself and wife.
This I consented to do, and had no
sooner settled down to business than his creditors
began crowding him, and in a very short time the business
“collapsed.” The only thing I had
from the wreck was an old billiard-table which he
turned over to me. As I had had quite a sad experience
in the billiard business only a year before, I now
thought I saw my only chance to get even. I therefore
rented a room and opened a billiard hall.
This was a regular bonanza, for about
three weeks. Indeed, too much so, for then, to
my regret, the “City dads” passed an ordinance
prohibiting the running of billiard rooms. As
I had commenced housekeeping about the time I opened
the billiard room, and had gone in debt for my furniture,
I found myself in a sad plight. The sale of the
outfit enabled me to pay but a small portion of my
indebtedness.
I was now stranded, and ready for
something else, but was completely non-plussed to
know what to do next. Of course I realized by
this time that I had a wife, and a “mother-in-law,”
and it began to look as though there must be some
genuine “hus’ling” done.
About this time the whole country
thereabouts was thrown into the wildest excitement
over the supposed mysterious murder of Almeda Davis,
for which a young man named Bunnell was arrested, tried
and acquitted. Deputy-sheriff Dennis, who made
the arrest, came to me the next day after the young
lady’s death, and asked me to write it up for
some of the leading City Dailies. I agreed to
do so, and to always give him a good “send off,”
if he would furnish me with the minutest facts during
the whole case. He did so, and I guess would be
surprised to learn that I made more money out of that
trial than he did, if it was a new business to me.
But it made us a comfortable living until about the
middle of winter, when I decided to move back to Ohio.
Before arranging to leave, I called on my creditors
at Bronson there were five of them and
explained my position. They each agreed that I
could do nothing there, and might better make a change,
and that they would gladly wait till I could make
a raise before asking or expecting me to pay.
We then proceeded to Ohio, arriving
home “broke,” where I explained to my
folks “just how it all happened.”
My mother said she thought I had done
splendidly “for a married man.”
Mr. Keefer said “It did beat the dl!”