“You have chosen the love ’that
lives sans murmurings,
Sans passion,’ and incuriously endures
The gradual lapse of time. You have
chosen as yours
A level life of little happenings;
And through the long autumnal evenings
Lord Love, no doubt, is of the company,
And hugs your ingleside contentedly,
Smiles at old griefs, and rustles needless
wings.
“And yet I think that sometimes
memories
Of divers trysts, of blood that urged
like wine
On moonlit nights, and of that first long
kiss
Whereby your lips were first made one
with mine,
Awake and trouble you, and loving is
Once more important and perhaps divine.”
ALLEN ROSSITER. Two in October.
I
To those who knew John Charteris only
through the medium of the printed page it must have
appeared that the novelist was stayed in mid-career
by an accident of unrelieved and singular brutality.
And truly, thus extinguished by the unfounded jealousy
of a madman, the force of Charteris’s genius
seemed, and seems to-day, as emphasized by that sinister
caprice of chance which annihilated it.
But people in Lichfield, after the
manner of each prophet’s countrymen, had their
own point of view. The artist always stood between
these people and the artist’s handiwork, in
part obscuring it.
In any event, it was generally agreed
in Lichfield that Anne Charteris’s conduct after
her husband’s death was not all which could be
desired. To begin with, she attended the funeral,
in black, it was true, but wearing only the lightest
of net veils pinned under her chin-“more
as if she were going somewhere on the train, you know,
than as if she were in genuine bereavement.”
“Jack didn’t approve of
mourning. He said it was a heathen survival.”
That was the only explanation she offered.
It seemed inadequate to Lichfield.
It was preferable, as good taste went, for a widow
to be too overcome to attend her husband’s funeral
at all. And Mrs. Charteris had not wept once
during the church ceremony, and had not even had hysterics
during the interment at Cedarwood; and she had capped
a scandalous morning’s work by remaining with
the undertaker and the bricklayers to supervise the
closing of John Charteris’s grave.
“Why, but of course. It
is the last thing I will ever be allowed to do for
him,” she had said, in innocent surprise.
“Why shouldn’t I?”
Her air was such that you were both
to talk to her about appearances.
“Because she isn’t a bit
like a widow,” as Mrs. Ashmeade pointed out.
“Anybody can condole with a widow, and devote
two outer sheets to explaining that you realize nothing
you can say will be of any comfort to her, and begin
at the top of the inside page by telling her how much
better off he is to-day-which I have always
thought a double-edged assertion when advanced to
a man’s widow. But you cannot condole with
a lantern whose light has been blown out. That
is what Anne is.”
Mrs. Ashmeade meditated and appeared
dissatisfied. “And John Charteris of all
people!”
Anne was presently about the Memorial
Edition of her husband’s collected writings.
It was magnificently printed and when marketed achieved
a flattering success. Robert Etheridge Townsend
was commissioned to write the authorized Life of
John Charteris and to arrange the two volumes
of Letters.
Anne was considered an authority on
literature and art in general, through virtue of reflected
glory. And in the interviews she granted various
journalists it was noticeable that she no longer referred
to “Jack” or to “Mr. Charteris,”
but to “my husband.” To have been
his wife was her one claim on estimation. And,
for the rest, it is inadequate to love the memory
of a martyr. Worship is demanded; and so the wife
became the priestess.
II
Into Colonel Musgrave’s mental
processes during this period it will not do to pry
too closely. The man had his white nights and
his battles, in part with real grief and regret, and
in part with sundry emotions which he took on faith
as the emotions he ought to have, and, therefore,
manifestly, suffered under.... “Patricia
was my wife, Jack was my brother,” ran his verdict
in the outcome; and beyond that he did not care to
go.
For death cowed his thoughts.
In the colonel’s explicit theology dead people
were straightway conveyed to either one or the other
of two places. He had very certainly never known
anybody who in his opinion merited the torments of
his orthodox Gehenna; so that in imagination he vaguely
populated its blazing corridors with Nero and Judas
and Cæsar Borgia and Henry VIII, and Spanish Inquisitors
and the aboriginal American Indians-excepting
of course his ancestress Pocahontas-and
with Benedict Arnold and all the “carpet-baggers”
and suchlike other eminent practitioners of depravity.
For no one whom Rudolph Musgrave had ever encountered
in the flesh had been really and profoundly wicked,
Rudolph Musgrave considered; and so, he always gravely
estimated this-or-that acquaintance, after death,
to be “better off, poor fellow”-as
the colonel phrased it, with a tinge of self-contradiction-even
if he actually refrained in fancy from endowing the
deceased with aureate harps and crowns and footgear.
In fine, death cowed the colonel’s thoughts;
beyond the grave they did not care to venture, and
when confronted with that abyss they decorously balked.
Patricia and Jack were as a matter
of course “better off,” then-and,
miraculously purged of faults, with all their defects
somehow remedied, the colonel’s wife and brother,
with Agatha and the colonel’s other interred
relatives, were partaking of dignified joys in bright
supernal iridescent realms, which the colonel resignedly
looked forward to entering, on some comfortably remote
day or another, and thus rejoining his transfigured
kindred.... Such was the colonel’s charitable
decision, in the forming whereof logic was in no way
implicated. For religion, as the colonel would
have told you sedately, was not a thing to be reasoned
about. Attempting to do that, you became in Rudolph
Musgrave’s honest eyes regrettably flippant.
Meanwhile Cousin Lucy Fentnor was
taking care of the colonel and little Roger.
And Lichfield, long before the lettering on Patricia’s
tombstone had time to lose its first light dusty gray,
had accredited Cousin Lucy Fentnor with illimitable
willingness to become Mrs. Rudolph Musgrave, upon
proper solicitation, although such tittle-tattle is
neither here nor there; for at worst, a widowed, childless
and impoverished second-cousin, discreetly advanced
in her forties, was entitled to keep house for the
colonel in his bereavement, as a jointly beneficial
arrangement, without provoking scandal’s tongue
to more than a jocose innuendo or two when people
met for “auction”-that new-fangled
perplexing variant of bridge, just introduced, wherein
you bid on the suits.... And, besides, Cousin
Lucy Fentnor (as befitted any one born an Allardyce)
was to all accounts a notable housekeeper, famed alike
for the perilous glassiness of her hardwood floors,
her dexterous management of servants, her Honiton-braid
fancy-work (familiar to every patron of Lichfield
charity bazaars), and her unparalleled calves-foot
jelly. Under Cousin Lucy Fentnor’s systematized
coddling little Roger grew like the proverbial ill
weed, and the colonel likewise waxed perceptibly in
girth.
Thus it was that accident and a woman’s
intervention seemed once more to combine in shielding
Rudolph Musgrave from discomfort. And in consequence
it was considered improbable that at this late day
the colonel would do the proper thing by Clarice Pendomer,
as, at the first tidings of Patricia’s death,
had been authentically rumored among the imaginative;
and, in fact, Lichfield no longer considered that
necessary. The claim of outraged morality against
these two had been thrown out of court, through some
unworded social statute of limitation, as far as Lichfield
went. Of course it was interesting to note that
the colonel called at Mrs. Pendomer’s rather
frequently nowadays; but, then, Clarice Pendomer had
all sorts of callers now-though not many
in skirts-and she played poker with men
for money until unregenerate hours of the night, and
was reputed with a wealth of corroborative detail
to have even less discussable sources of income:
so that, indeed, Clarice Pendomer was now rather precariously
retained within the social pale through her initial
precaution of having been born a Bellingham....
But all such tittle-tattle, as has been said, is quite
beside the mark, since with the decadence of Clarice
Pendomer this chronicle has, in the outcome, as scant
concern as with the marital aspirations of Cousin
Lucy Fentnor.
And, moreover, the colonel-in
colloquial phrase at least-went everywhere.
After the six months of comparative seclusion which
decency exacted of his widowerhood-and
thereby afforded him ample leisure to complete and
publish his Lichfield Legislative Papers prior to
1800-the colonel, be it repeated, went
everywhere; and people found him no whit the worse
company for his black gloves and the somber band stitched
to his coatsleeve. So Lichfield again received
him gladly, as the social triumph of his generation.
Handsome and trim and affable, no imaginable tourist
could possibly have divined-for everybody
in Lichfield knew, of course-that Rudolph
Musgrave had rounded his half-century; and he stayed,
as ever, invaluable to Lichfield matrons alike against
the entertainment of an “out-of-town” girl,
the management of a cotillon, and the prevention of
unpleasant pauses among incongruous dinner-companies.
But of Anne Charteris he saw very
little nowadays. And, indeed, it was of her own
choice that Anne lived apart from Lichfieldian junketings,
contented with her dreams and her pride therein, and
her remorseful tender memories of the things she might
have done for Jack and had not done-lived
upon exalted levels nowadays, to which the colonel’s
more urbane bereavement did not aspire.
III
“Charteris” was engraved
in large, raised letters upon the granite coping over
which Anne stepped to enter the trim burial-plot wherein
her dead lay.
The place to-day is one of the “points
of interest” in Cedarwood. Tourists, passing
through Lichfield, visit it as inevitably as they do
the graves of the Presidents, the Southern generals
and the many other famous people which the old cemetery
contains; and the negro hackmen of Lichfield are already
profuse in inaccurate information concerning its occupant.
In a phrase, the post card which pictures “E
9436-Grave of John Charteris” is
among the seven similar misinterpretations of localities
most frequently demanded in Lichfieldian drugstores
and news-stands.
Her victoria had paused a trifle
farther up the hill, where two big sycamores overhung
the roadway. She came into the place alone, walking
quickly, for she was unwarrantably flustered by her
late encounter. And when she found, of all people,
Rudolph Musgrave standing by her husband’s grave,
as in a sort of puzzled and yet reverent meditation,
she was, and somehow as half-guiltily, assuring herself
there was no possible reason for the repugnance-nay,
the rage,-which a mere glimpse of trudging,
painted and flamboyant Clarice Pendomer had kindled.
Yet it must be recorded that Anne had always detested
Clarice.
Now Anne spoke, as the phrase runs,
before she thought. “She came with you!”
And he answered, as from the depths
of an uncalled-for comprehension which was distinctly
irritating:
“Yes. And Harry, too, for
that matter. Only our talk got somehow to be
not quite the sort it would be salutary for him to
take an interest in. So we told Harry to walk
on slowly to the gate, and be sure not to do any number
of things he would never have thought of if we hadn’t
suggested them. You know how people are with children--”
“Harry is-her boy?”
Anne, being vexed, had almost added-“and
yours?”
“Oh--! Say
the fons et origo of the Pendomer divorce case,
poor little chap. Yes, Harry is her boy.”
Anne said, and again, as she perceived
within the moment, a thought too expeditiously:
“I wish you wouldn’t bring them here, Colonel
Musgrave.”
Indeed, it seemed to her flat desecration
that Musgrave should have brought his former mistress
into this hallowed plot of ground. She did not
mind-illogically, perhaps-his
bringing the child.
“Eh--? Oh,
yes,” said Colonel Musgrave. He was sensibly
nettled. “You wish ‘Colonel Musgrave’
wouldn’t bring them here. But then, you
see, we had been to Patricia’s grave. And
we remembered how Jack stood by us both when-when
things bade fair to be even more unpleasant for Clarice
and myself than they actually were. You shouldn’t,
I think, grudge even such moral reprobates the privilege
of being properly appreciative of what he did for
both of us. Besides, you always come on Saturdays,
you know. We couldn’t very well anticipate
that you would be here this afternoon.”
So he had been at pains to spy upon
her! Anne phrased it thus in her soul, being
irritated, and crisply answered:
“I am leaving Lichfield to-morrow.
I had meant this to be my farewell to them until October.”
Colonel Musgrave had glanced toward
the little headstone, with its rather lengthy epitaph,
which marked the resting-place of this woman’s
only child; and then to the tall shaft whereon was
engraved just “John Charteris.” The
latter inscription was very characteristic of her
view-point, he reflected; and yet reasonable, too;
as one might mention a Hector or a Goethe, say, without
being at pains to disclaim allusion to the minor sharers
of either name.
“Yes,” he said. “Well, I shall
not intrude.”
“No-wait,” she dissented.
Her voice was altered now, for there
had come into it a marvelous gentleness.
And Colonel Musgrave remained motionless.
The whole world was motionless, ineffably expectant,
as it seemed to him.
Sunset was at hand. On one side
was the high wooden fence which showed the boundary
of Cedarwood, and through its palings and above it,
was visible the broad, shallow river, comfortably
colored, for the most part, like cafe au lait,
but flecked with many patches of foam and flat iron-colored
rocks and innumerable islets, some no bigger than a
billiard-table, but with even the tiniest boasting
a tree or two. On the other-westward-was
a mounting vista of close-shaven turf, and many copings,
like magnified geometrical problems, and a host of
stunted growing things-with the staid verdancy
of evergreens predominant-and a multitude
of candid shafts and slabs and crosses and dwarfed
lambs and meditant angels.
Some of these thronged memorials were
tinged with violet, and others were a-glitter like
silver, just as the ordered trees shaded them or no
from the low sun. The disposition of all worldly
affairs, the man dimly knew, was very anciently prearranged
by an illimitable and, upon the whole, a kindly wisdom.
She was considering the change in
him. Anne was recollecting that Colonel Musgrave
had somewhat pointedly avoided her since her widowhood.
He seemed almost a stranger nowadays.
And she could not recognize in the
man any resemblance to the boy whom she remembered-so
long ago-excepting just his womanish mouth,
which was as in the old time very full and red and
sensitive. And, illogically enough, both this
great change in him and this one feature that had
never changed annoyed her equally.
She was also worried by his odd tone
of flippancy. It jarred, it vaguely-for
the phrase has no equivalent-“rubbed
her the wrong way.” Here at a martyr’s
tomb it was hideously out-of-place, and yet she did
not see her way clear to rebuke. So she remained
silent.
But Rudolph Musgrave was uncanny in
some respects. For he said within the moment,
“I am not a bit like John Charteris, am I?”
“No,” she answered, quietly.
It had been her actual thought.
Anne stayed a tiny while quite motionless.
Her eyes saw nothing physical. It was the attitude,
Colonel Musgrave reflected, of one who listens to
a far-off music and, incommunicably, you knew that
the music was of a martial sort. She was all
in black, of course, very slim and pure and beautiful.
The great cluster of red roses, loosely held, was
like blood against the somber gown.
The widow of John Charteris, in fine,
was a very different person from that Anne Willoughby
whom Rudolph Musgrave had loved so long and long ago.
This woman had tasted of tonic sorrows unknown to Rudolph
Musgrave, and had got consolation too, somehow, in
far half-credible uplands unvisited by him. But,
he knew, she lived, and was so exquisite, mainly by
virtue of that delusion which he, of all men, had preserved;
Anne Charteris was of his creation, his masterpiece;
and viewing her, he was aware of great reverence and
joy.
Anne was happy. It was for that he had played.
But aloud, “I am envious,”
Rudolph Musgrave declared. “He is the single
solitary man I ever knew whose widow was contented
to be simply his relict for ever and ever, amen.
For you will always be just the woman John Charteris
loved, won’t you? Yes, if you lived to be
thirty-seven years older than Methuselah, and every
genius and potentate in the world should come a-wooing
in the meantime, it never would occur to you that
you could possibly be anything, even to an insane person,
except his relict. And he has been dead now all
of three whole years! So I am envious, just as
we ordinary mortals can’t help being of you both;
and-may I say it?-I am glad.”
IV
They were standing thus when a boy
of ten or eleven came unhurriedly into the “section.”
He assumed possession of Colonel Musgrave’s hand
as though the action were a matter of course.
“I got lost, Colonel Musgrave,”
the child composedly announced. “I walked
ever so far, and the gate wasn’t where we left
it. And the roads kept turning and twisting so,
it seemed I’d never get anywhere. I don’t
like being lost when it’s getting dark and there’s
so many dead people ’round, do you?”
The colonel was moved to disapproval.
“Young man, I suppose your poor deserted mother
is looking for you everywhere, and has probably torn
out every solitary strand of hair she possesses by
this time.”
“I reckon she is,” the
boy assented. The topic did not appear to be in
his eyes of preeminent importance.
Then Anne Charteris said, “Harry,”
and her voice was such that Rudolph Musgrave wheeled
with amazement in his face.
The boy had gone to her complaisantly,
and she stood now with one hand on either of his shoulders,
regarding him. Her lips were parted, but they
did not move at all.
“You are Mrs. Pendomer’s
boy, aren’t you?” said Anne Charteris,
in a while. She had some difficulty in articulation.
“Yes’m,” Harry assented,
“and we come here ’most every Wednesday,
and, please, ma’am, you’re hurtin’
me.”
“I didn’t mean to-dear,”
the woman added, painfully. “Don’t
interfere with me, Rudolph Musgrave! Your mother
must be very fond of you, Harry. I had a little
boy once. I was fond of him. He would have
been eleven years old last February.”
“Please, ma’am, I wasn’t
eleven till April, and I ain’t tall for my age,
but Tubby Parsons says--”
The woman gave an odd, unhuman sound. “Not
until April!”
“Harry,” said Colonel
Musgrave then, “an enormous whale is coming down
the river in precisely two minutes. Perhaps if
you were to look through the palings of that fence
you might see him. I don’t suppose you would
care to, though?”
And Harry strolled resignedly toward
the fence. Harry Pendomer did not like this funny
lady who had hurt, frightened eyes. He did not
believe in the whale, of course, any more than he
did in Santa Claus. But like most children, he
patiently accepted the fact that grown people are
unaccountable overlords appointed by some vast bêtise,
whom, if only through prudential motives, it is preferable
to humor.
V
Colonel Musgrave stood now upon the
other side of John Charteris’s grave-just
in the spot that was reserved for her own occupancy
some day.
“You are ill, Anne. You are not fit to
be out. Go home.”
“I had a little boy once,”
she said. “’But that’s all past and
gone, and good times and bad times and all times pass
over.’ There’s an odd simple music
in the sentence, isn’t there? Yet I remember
it chiefly because I used to read that book to him
and he loved it. And it was my child that died.
Why is this other child so like him?”
“Oh, then, that’s it,
is it?” said Rudolph Musgrave, as in relief.
“Bless me, I suppose all these little shavers
are pretty much alike. I can only tell Roger
from the other boys by his red head. Humanity
in the raw, you know. Still, it is no wonder
it gave you a turn. You had much better go home,
however, and not take any foolish risks, and put your
feet in hot water, and rub cologne on your temples,
and do all the other suitable things--”
“I remember now,” she
continued, without any apparent emotion, and as though
he had not spoken. “When I came into the
room you were saying that the child must be considered.
You were both very angry, and I was alarmed-foolishly
alarmed, perhaps. And my-and John Charteris
said, ’Let him tell, then’-and
you told me-”
“The truth, Anne.”
“And he sat quietly by.
Oh, if he’d had the grace, the common manliness-!”
She shivered here. “But he never interrupted
you. I-I was not looking at him.
I was thinking how vile you were. And when you
had ended, he said, ’My dear, I am sorry you
should have been involved in this. But since
you are, I think we can assure Rudolph that both of
us will regard his confidence as sacred.’
Then I remembered him, and thought how noble he was!
And all those years that were so happy, hour by hour,
he was letting you-meet his bills!”
She seemed to wrench out the inadequate metaphor.
You could hear the far-off river,
now, faint as the sound of boiling water.
After a few pacings Colonel Musgrave
turned upon her. He spoke with a curious simplicity.
“There isn’t any use in
lying to you. You wouldn’t believe.
You would only go to some one else-some
woman probably,-who would jump at the chance
of telling you everything and a deal more. Yes,
there are a great many ‘they do say’s’
floating about. This was the only one that came
near being-serious. The man was very
clever.-Oh, he wasn’t vulgarly lecherous.
He was simply-Jack Charteris. He always
irritated Lichfield, though, by not taking Lichfield
very seriously. You would hear every by-end of
retaliative and sniggered-over mythology, and in your
present state of mind you would believe all of them.
I happen to know that a great many of these stories
are not true.”
“A great many of these stories,”
Anne repeated, “aren’t true! A great
many aren’t! That ought to be consoling,
oughtn’t it?” She spoke without a trace
of bitterness.
“I express myself very badly.
What I really mean, what I am aiming at, is that I
wish you would let me answer any questions you might
like to ask, because I will answer them truthfully.
Very few people would. You see, you go about
the world so like a gray-stone saint who has just
stepped down from her niche for the fraction of a second,”
he added, as with venom, “that it is only human
nature to dislike you.”
Anne was not angry. It had come
to her, quite as though she were considering some
other woman, that what the man said was, in a fashion,
true.
“There is sunlight and fresh
air in the street,” John Charteris had been
wont to declare, “and there is a culvert at the
corner. I think it is a mistake for us to emphasize
the culvert.”
So he had trained her to disbelieve
in its existence. She saw this now. It did
not matter. It seemed to her that nothing mattered
any more.
“I’ve only one question,
I think. Why did you do it?” She spoke with
bright amazement in her eyes.
“Oh, my dear, my dear!”
he seriocomically deplored. “Why, because
it was such a noble thing to do. It was so like
the estimable young man in a play, you know, who acknowledges
the crime he never committed and takes a curtain-call
immediately afterwards. In fine, I simply observed
to myself, with the late Monsieur de Bergerac, ‘But
what a gesture!’” And he parodied an actor’s
motion in this rôle.
She stayed unsmiling and patiently
awaiting veracity. Anne did not understand that
Colonel Musgrave was telling the absolute truth.
And so,
“You haven’t any
sense of humor,” he lamented. “You
used to have a deal, too, before you took to being
conscientiously cheerful, and diffusing sweetness
and light among your cowering associates. Well,
it was because it helped him a little. Oh, I
am being truthful now. I had some reason to dislike
Jack Charteris, but odd as it is, I know to-day I
never did. I ought to have, perhaps. But
I didn’t.”
“My friend, you are being almost
truthful. But I want the truth entire.”
“It isn’t polite to disbelieve
people,” he reproved her; “or at the very
least, according to the best books on etiquette, you
ought not to do it audibly. Would you mind if
I smoked? I could be more veracious then.
There is something in tobacco that makes frankness
a matter of course. I thank you.”
He produced an amber holder, fitted
a cigarette into it, and presently inhaled twice.
He said, with a curt voice:
“The reason, naturally, was
you. You may remember certain things that happened
just before John Charteris came and took you.
Oh, that is precisely what he did! You are rather
a narrow-minded woman now, in consequence-or
in my humble opinion, at least-and deplorably
superior. It pleased the man to have in his house-if
you will overlook my venturing into metaphor,-one
cool room very sparsely furnished where he could come
when the mood seized him. He took the raw material
from me, wherewith to build that room, because he
wanted that room. I acquiesced, because I had
not the skill wherewith to fight him.”
Anne understood him now, as with a
great drench of surprise. And fear was what she
felt in chief when she saw for just this moment as
though it had lightened, the man’s face transfigured,
and tender, and strange to her.
“I tried to buy your happiness,
to-yes, just to keep you blind indefinitely.
Had the price been heavier, I would have paid it the
more gladly. Fate has played a sorry trick. You
would never have seen through him. My dear, I
have wanted very often to shake you,” he said.
And she knew, in a glorious terror,
that she desired him to shake her, and as she had
never desired anything else in life.
“Oh, well, I am just a common,
ordinary, garden-sort of fool. The Musgraves
always are, in one fashion or another,” he sulkily
concluded. And now the demigod was merely Rudolph
Musgrave again, and she was not afraid any longer,
but only inexpressibly fordone.
“Isn’t that like a woman?”
he presently demanded of the June heavens. “To
drag something out of a man with inflexibility, monomania
and moral grappling-irons, and then not like
it! Oh, very well! I am disgusted by your
sex’s axiomatic variability. I shall take
Harry to his fond mamma at once.”
She did not say anything. A certain
new discovery obsessed her like a piece of piercing
music.
Then Rudolph Musgrave gave the tiniest
of gestures downward. “And I have told
you this, in chief, because we two remember him.
He wanted you. He took you. You are his.
You will always be. He gave you just a fragment
of himself. That fragment was worth more than
everything I had to offer.”
Anne very carefully arranged her roses
on the ivy-covered grave. “I do not know-meanwhile,
I give these to our master. And my real widowhood
begins to-day.”
And as she rose he looked at her across
the colorful mound, and smiled, half as with embarrassment.
A lie, he thought, might ameliorate the situation,
and he bravely hazarded a prodigious one. “Is
it necessary to tell you that Jack loved you?
And that the others never really counted?”
He rejoiced to see that Anne believed
him. “No,” she assented, “no,
not with him. Oddly enough, I am proud of that,
even now. But-don’t you see?-I
never loved him. I was just his priestess-the
priestess of a stucco god! Otherwise, I would
know it wasn’t his fault, but altogether that
of-the others.”
He grimaced and gave a bantering flirt
of his head. He said, with quizzing eyes:
“Would it do any good to quote
Lombroso, and Maudsley, and Gall, and Krafft-Ebing,
and Flechsig, and so on? and to tell you that the
excessive use of one brain faculty must necessarily
cause a lack of nutriment to all the other brain-cells?
It would be rather up-to-date. There is a deal
I could tell you also as to what poisonous blood he
inherited; but to do this I have not the right.”
And then Rudolph Musgrave said in all sincerity:
“’A wild, impetuous whirlwind of passion
and faculty slumbered quiet there; such heavenly melody
dwelling in the heart of it.’”
She had put aside alike the drolling
and the palliative suggestion, like flimsy veils.
“I think it wouldn’t do any good whatever.
When growing things are broken by the whirlwind, they
don’t, as a rule, discuss the theory of air-currents
as a consolation. Men such as he was take what
they desire. It isn’t fair-to
us others. But it’s true, for all that-”
Their eyes met warily; and for no
reason which they shared in common they smiled together.
“Poor little Lady of Shalott,”
said Rudolph Musgrave, “the mirror is cracked
from side to side, isn’t it? I am sorry.
For life is not so easily disposed of. And there
is only life to look at now, and life is a bewilderingly
complex business, you will find, because the laws of
it are so childishly simple-and implacable.
And one of these laws seems to be that in our little
planet, might makes right-”
He stayed to puff his cigarette.
“Oh, Rudolph dear, don’t-don’t
be just a merry-Andrew!” she cried impulsively,
before he had time to continue, which she perceived
he meant to do, as if it did not matter.
And he took her full meaning, quite
as he had been used in the old times to discourse
upon a half-sentence. “I am afraid I am
that, rather,” he said, reflectively. “But
then Clarice and I could hardly have weathered scandal
except by making ourselves particularly agreeable to
everybody. And somehow I got into the habit of
making people laugh. It isn’t very difficult.
I am rather an adept at telling stories which just
graze impropriety, for instance. You know, they
call me the social triumph of my generation.
And people are glad to see me because I am ’so
awfully funny’ and ‘simply killing’
and so on. And I suppose it tells in the long
run-like the dyer’s hand, you know.”
“It does tell.” Anne
was thinking it would always tell. And that, too,
would be John Charteris’s handiwork.
Ensued a silence. Rudolph Musgrave
was painstakingly intent upon his cigarette.
A nestward-plunging bird called to his mate impatiently.
Then Anne shook her head impatiently.
“Come, while I’m thinking,
I will drive you back to Lichfield.”
“Oh, no; that wouldn’t
do at all,” he said, with absolute decision.
“No, you see I have to return the boy.
And I can’t quite imagine your carriage waiting
at the doors of ‘that Mrs. Pendomer.’”
“Oh,” Anne fleetingly
thought, “he would have understood.”
But aloud she only said: “And do you think
I hate her any longer? Yes, it is true I hated
her until to-day, and now I’m just sincerely
sorry for her. For she and I-and you
and even the child yonder-and all that any
of us is to-day-are just so many relics
of John Charteris. Yet he has done with us-at
last!”
She said this with an inhalation of
the breath; but she did not look at him.
“Take care!” he said,
with an unreasonable harshness. “For I forewarn
you I am imagining vain things.”
“I’m not afraid, somehow.”
But Anne did not look at him.
He saw as with a rending shock how
like the widow of John Charteris was to Anne Willoughby;
and unforgotten pulses, very strange and irrational
and dear, perplexed him sorely. He debated, and
flung aside the cigarette as an out-moded detail of
his hobbling part.
“You say I did a noble thing
for you. I tried to. But quixotism has its
price. To-day I am not quite the man who did that
thing. John Charteris has set his imprint too
deep upon us. We served his pleasure. We
are not any longer the boy and girl who loved each
other.”
She waited in the rising twilight
with a yet averted face. The world was motionless,
ineffably expectant, as it seemed to him. And
the disposition of all worldly affairs, the man dimly
knew, was very anciently prearranged by an illimitable
and, upon the whole, a kindly wisdom.
So that, “My dear, my dear!”
he swiftly said: “I don’t think I
can word just what my feeling is for you. Always
my view of the world has been that you existed, and
that some other people existed-as accessories-”
Then he was silent for a heart-beat,
appraising her. His hands lifted toward her and
fell within the moment, as if it were in impotence.
Anne spoke at last, and the sweet
voice of her was very glad and proud and confident.
“My friend, remember that I
have not thanked you. You have done the most
foolish and-the manliest thing I ever knew
a man to do, just for my sake. And I have accepted
it as if it were a matter of course. And I shall
always do so. Because it was your right to do
this very brave and foolish thing for me. I know
you joyed in doing it. Rudolph ... you cannot
understand how glad I am you joyed in doing it.”
Their eyes met. It is not possible
to tell you all they were aware of through that moment,
because it is a knowledge so rarely apprehended, and
even then for such a little while, that no man who
has sensed it can remember afterward aught save the
splendor and perfection of it.
And yet Anne looked back once.
There was just the tall, stark shaft, and on it “John
Charteris.” The thing was ominous and vast,
all colored like wet gravel, save where the sunlight
tipped it with clean silver very high above their
reach.
“Come,” she quickly said
to Rudolph Musgrave; “come, for I am afraid.”
VI
And are we then to leave them with
glad faces turned to that new day wherein, above the
ashes of old errors and follies and mischances and
miseries, they were to raise the structure of such
a happiness as earth rarely witnesses? Would
it not be, instead, a grateful task more fully to
depicture how Rudolph Musgrave’s love of Anne
won finally to its reward, and these two shared the
evening of their lives in tranquil service of unswerving
love come to its own at last?
Undoubtedly, since the espousal of
one’s first love-by oneself-is
a phenomenon rarely encountered outside of popular
fiction, it would be a very gratifying task to record
that Anne and Rudolph Musgrave were married that autumn;
that subsequently Lichfield was astounded by the fervor
of their life-long bliss; that Colonel and (the second)
Mrs. Musgrave were universally respected, in a word,
and their dinner-parties were always prominently chronicled
by the Lichfield Courier-Herald; and that Anne
took excellent care of little Roger, and that she and
her second husband proved eminently suited to each
other.
But, as a matter of fact, not one
of these things ever happened....
“I have been thinking it over,”
Anne deplored. “Oh, Rudolph dear, I perfectly
realize you are the best and noblest man I ever knew.
And I have always loved you very much, my dear; that
is why I could never abide poor Mrs. Pendomer.
And yet-it is a feeling I simply can’t
explain--”
“That you belong to Jack in
spite of everything?” the colonel said.
“Why, but of course! I might have known
that Jack would never have allowed any simple incidental
happening such as his death to cause his missing a
possible trick.”
Anne would have comforted Rudolph
Musgrave; but, to her discomfiture, the colonel was
grinning, however ruefully.
“I was thinking,” he stated,
“of the only time that I ever, to my knowledge,
talked face to face with the devil. It is rather
odd how obstinately life clings to the most hackneyed
trick of ballad-makers; and still naively pretends
to enrich her productions by the stale device of introducing
a refrain-so that the idlest remarks of
as much as three years ago keep cropping up as the
actual gist of the present!... However, were
it within my power, I would evoke Amaimon straightway
now to come up yonder, through your hearthrug, and
to answer me quite honestly if I did not tell him
on the beach at Matocton that this, precisely this,
would be the outcome of your knowing everything!”
“I told you that I couldn’t,
quite, explain--” Anne
said.
“Eh, but I can, my dear,”
he informed her. “The explanation is that
Lichfield bore us, shaped us, and made us what we are.
We may not enjoy a monopoly of the virtues here in
Lichfield, but there is one trait at least which the
children of Lichfield share in common. We are
loyal. We give but once; and when we give, we
give all that we have; and when we have once given
it, neither common-sense, nor a concourse of expostulating
seraphim, nor anything else in the universe, can induce
us to believe that a retraction, or even a qualification,
of the gift would be quite worthy of us.”
“But that-that’s
foolish. Why, it’s unreasonable,”
Anne pointed out.
“Of course it is. And that
is why I am proud of Lichfield. And that is why
you are to-day Jack’s wife and always will be
just Jack’s wife-and why to-day I
am Patricia’s husband-and why Lichfield
to-day is Lichfield. There is something braver
in life than to be just reasonable, thank God!
And so, we keep the faith, my dear, however obsolete
we find fidelity to be. We keep to the old faith-we
of Lichfield, who have given hostages to the past.
We remember even now that we gave freely in an old
time, and did not haggle.... And so, we are proud-yes!
we are consumedly proud, and we know that we have
earned the right to be proud.”
A little later Colonel Musgrave said:
“And yet-it takes
a monstrous while to dispose of our universe’s
subtleties. I have loved you my whole life long,
as accurately as we can phrase these matters.
There is no-no reasonable reason
why you should not marry me now; and you would marry
me if I pressed it. And I do not press it.
Perhaps it all comes of our both having been reared
in Lichfield. Perhaps that is why I, too, have
been ‘thinking it over.’ You see,”
he added, with a smile, “the rivet in grandfather’s
neck is not lightly to be ignored, after all.
No, you do not know what I am talking about, my dear.
And-well, anyhow, I belong to Patricia.
Upon the whole, I am glad that I belong to Patricia;
for Patricia and what Patricia meant to me was the
one vital thing in a certain person’s rather
hand-to-mouth existence-oh, yes, in spite
of everything! I know it now. Anne Charteris,”
the colonel cried, “I wouldn’t marry you
or any other woman breathing, even though you were
to kneel and implore me upon the knees of a centipede.
For I belong to Patricia; and the rivet stays unbroken,
after all.”
“Oh, and am I being very foolish
again?” Anne asked. “For I have been
remembering that when-when Jack was not
quite truthful about some things, you know,-the
truth he hid was always one which would have hurt
me. And I like to believe that was, at least in
part, the reason he hid it, Rudolph. So he purchased
my happiness-well, at ugly prices perhaps.
But he purchased it, none the less; and I had it through
all those years. So why shouldn’t I-after
all-be very grateful to him? And,
besides”-her voice broke-“besides,
he was Jack, you know. He belonged to me.
What does it matter what he did? He belonged to
me, and I loved him.”
And to the colonel’s discomfort Anne began to
cry.
“There, there!” he said,
“so the real truth is out at last. And tears
don’t help very much. It does seem a bit
unfair, my dear, I know. But that is simply because
you and I are living in a universe which has never
actually committed itself, under any penalizing bond,
to be entirely candid as to the laws by which it is
conducted.”
But it may be that Rudolph Musgrave
voiced quite obsolete views. For he said this
at a very remote period-when the Beef Trust
was being “investigated” in Washington;
when an excited Iberian constabulary was still hunting
the anarchists who had attempted to assassinate the
young King and Queen of Spain upon their wedding-day;
when the rebuilding of an earthquake-shattered San
Francisco was just beginning to be talked of as a
possibility; and when editorials were mostly devoted
to discussion of what Mr. Bryan would have to say
about bi-metallism when he returned from his foreign
tour.
And, besides, it was Rudolph Musgrave’s
besetting infirmity always to shrink-under
shelter of whatever grandiloquent excuse-from
making changes. One may permissibly estimate
this foible to have weighed with him a little, even
now, just as in all things it had always weighed in
Lichfield with all his generation. An old custom
is not lightly broken.