Marlow emerged out of the shadow of
the book-case to get himself a cigar from a box which
stood on a little table by my side. In the full
light of the room I saw in his eyes that slightly
mocking expression with which he habitually covers
up his sympathetic impulses of mirth and pity before
the unreasonable complications the idealism of mankind
puts into the simple but poignant problem of conduct
on this earth.
He selected and lit the cigar with
affected care, then turned upon me, I had been looking
at him silently.
“I suppose,” he said,
the mockery of his eyes giving a pellucid quality
to his tone, “that you think it’s high
time I told you something definite. I mean something
about that psychological cabin mystery of discomfort
(for it’s obvious that it must be psychological)
which affected so profoundly Mr. Franklin the chief
mate, and had even disturbed the serene innocence
of Mr. Powell, the second of the ship Ferndale,
commanded by Roderick Anthony the son of
the poet, you know.”
“You are going to confess now
that you have failed to find it out,” I said
in pretended indignation.
“It would serve you right if
I told you that I have. But I won’t.
I haven’t failed. I own though that for
a time, I was puzzled. However, I have now seen
our Powell many times under the most favourable conditions and
besides I came upon a most unexpected source of information
. . . But never mind that. The means don’t
concern you except in so far as they belong to the
story. I’ll admit that for some time the
old-maiden-lady-like occupation of putting two and
two together failed to procure a coherent theory.
I am speaking now as an investigator a
man of deductions. With what we know of Roderick
Anthony and Flora de Barral I could not deduct an
ordinary marital quarrel beautifully matured in less
than a year could I? If you ask me
what is an ordinary marital quarrel I will tell you,
that it is a difference about nothing; I mean, these
nothings which, as Mr. Powell told us when we first
met him, shore people are so prone to start a row about,
and nurse into hatred from an idle sense of wrong,
from perverted ambition, for spectacular reasons too.
There are on earth no actors too humble and obscure
not to have a gallery; that gallery which envenoms
the play by stealthy jeers, counsels of anger, amused
comments or words of perfidious compassion.
However, the Anthonys were free from all demoralizing
influences. At sea, you know, there is no gallery.
You hear no tormenting echoes of your own littleness
there, where either a great elemental voice roars
defiantly under the sky or else an elemental silence
seems to be part of the infinite stillness of the universe.
Remembering Flora de Barral in the
depths of moral misery, and Roderick Anthony carried
away by a gust of tempestuous tenderness, I asked myself,
Is it all forgotten already? What could they
have found to estrange them from each other with this
rapidity and this thoroughness so far from all temptations,
in the peace of the sea and in an isolation so complete
that if it had not been the jealous devotion of the
sentimental Franklin stimulating the attention of
Powell, there would have been no record, no evidence
of it at all.
I must confess at once that it was
Flora de Barral whom I suspected. In this world
as at present organized women are the suspected half
of the population. There are good reasons for
that. These reasons are so discoverable with
a little reflection that it is not worth my while to
set them out for you. I will only mention this:
that the part falling to women’s share being
all “influence” has an air of occult and
mysterious action, something not altogether trustworthy
like all natural forces which, for us, work in the
dark because of our imperfect comprehension.
If women were not a force of nature,
blind in its strength and capricious in its power,
they would not be mistrusted. As it is one can’t
help it. You will say that this force having
been in the person of Flora de Barral captured by
Anthony . . . Why yes. He had dealt with
her masterfully. But man has captured electricity
too. It lights him on his way, it warms his
home, it will even cook his dinner for him very
much like a woman. But what sort of conquest
would you call it? He knows nothing of it.
He has got to be mighty careful what he is about
with his captive. And the greater the demand
he makes on it in the exultation of his pride the more
likely it is to turn on him and burn him to a cinder
. . . "
“A far-fetched enough parallel,”
I observed coldly to Marlow. He had returned
to the arm-chair in the shadow of the bookcase.
“But accepting the meaning you have in your
mind it reduces itself to the knowledge of how to
use it. And if you mean that this ravenous Anthony ”
“Ravenous is good,” interrupted
Marlow. “He was a-hungering and a-thirsting
for femininity to enter his life in a way no mere feminist
could have the slightest conception of. I reckon
that this accounts for much of Fyne’s disgust
with him. Good little Fyne. You have no
idea what infernal mischief he had worked during his
call at the hotel. But then who could have suspected
Anthony of being a heroic creature. There are
several kinds of heroism and one of them at least is
idiotic. It is the one which wears the aspect
of sublime delicacy. It is apparently the one
of which the son of the delicate poet was capable.
He certainly resembled his father,
who, by the way, wore out two women without any satisfaction
to himself, because they did not come up to his supra-refined
standard of the delicacy which is so perceptible in
his verses. That’s your poet. He
demands too much from others. The inarticulate
son had set up a standard for himself with that need
for embodying in his conduct the dreams, the passion,
the impulses the poet puts into arrangements of verses,
which are dearer to him than his own self and
may make his own self appear sublime in the eyes of
other people, and even in his own eyes.
Did Anthony wish to appear sublime
in his own eyes? I should not like to make that
charge; though indeed there are other, less noble,
ambitions at which the world does not dare to smile.
But I don’t think so; I do not even think that
there was in what he did a conscious and lofty confidence
in himself, a particularly pronounced sense of power
which leads men so often into impossible or equivocal
situations. Looked at abstractedly (the way
in which truth is often seen in its real shape) his
life had been a life of solitude and silence and
desire.
Chance had thrown that girl in his
way; and if we may smile at his violent conquest of
Flora de Barral we must admit also that this eager
appropriation was truly the act of a man of solitude
and desire; a man also, who, unless a complete imbecile,
must have been a man of long and ardent reveries wherein
the faculty of sincere passion matures slowly in the
unexplored recesses of the heart. And I know
also that a passion, dominating or tyrannical, invading
the whole man and subjugating all his faculties to
its own unique end, may conduct him whom it spurs and
drives, into all sorts of adventures, to the brink
of unfathomable dangers, to the limits of folly, and
madness, and death.
To the man then of a silence made
only more impressive by the inarticulate thunders
and mutters of the great seas, an utter stranger to
the clatter of tongues, there comes the muscular little
Fyne, the most marked representative of that mankind
whose voice is so strange to him, the husband of his
sister, a personality standing out from the misty and
remote multitude. He comes and throws at him
more talk than he had ever heard boomed out in an
hour, and certainly touching the deepest things Anthony
had ever discovered in himself, and flings words like
“unfair” whose very sound is abhorrent
to him. Unfair! Undue advantage!
He! Unfair to that girl? Cruel to her!
No scorn could stand against the impression
of such charges advanced with heat and conviction.
They shook him. They were yet vibrating in the
air of that stuffy hotel-room, terrific, disturbing,
impossible to get rid of, when the door opened and
Flora de Barral entered.
He did not even notice that she was
late. He was sitting on a sofa plunged in gloom.
Was it true? Having himself always said exactly
what he meant he imagined that people (unless they
were liars, which of course his brother-in-law could
not be) never said more than they meant. The
deep chest voice of little Fyne was still in his ear.
“He knows,” Anthony said to himself.
He thought he had better go away and never see her
again. But she stood there before him accusing
and appealing. How could he abandon her?
That was out of the question. She had no one.
Or rather she had someone. That father.
Anthony was willing to take him at her valuation.
This father may have been the victim of the most
atrocious injustice. But what could a man coming
out of jail do? An old man too. And then what
sort of man? What would become of them both?
Anthony shuddered slightly and the faint smile with
which Flora had entered the room faded on her lips.
She was used to his impetuous tenderness. She
was no longer afraid of it. But she had never
seen him look like this before, and she suspected
at once some new cruelty of life. He got up
with his usual ardour but as if sobered by a momentous
resolve and said:
“No. I can’t let
you out of my sight. I have seen you. You
have told me your story. You are honest.
You have never told me you loved me.”
She waited, saying to herself that
he had never given her time, that he had never asked
her! And that, in truth, she did not know!
I am inclined to believe that she
did not. As abundance of experience is not precisely
her lot in life, a woman is seldom an expert in matters
of sentiment. It is the man who can and generally
does “see himself” pretty well inside
and out. Women’s self-possession is an
outward thing; inwardly they flutter, perhaps because
they are, or they feel themselves to be, engaged.
All this speaking generally. In Flora de Barral’s
particular case ever since Anthony had suddenly broken
his way into her hopeless and cruel existence she
lived like a person liberated from a condemned cell
by a natural cataclysm, a tempest, an earthquake; not
absolutely terrified, because nothing can be worse
than the eve of execution, but stunned, bewildered abandoning
herself passively. She did not want to make
a sound, to move a limb. She hadn’t the
strength. What was the good? And deep down,
almost unconsciously she was seduced by the feeling
of being supported by this violence. A sensation
she had never experienced before in her life.
She felt as if this whirlwind were
calming down somehow! As if this feeling of
support, which was tempting her to close her eyes deliciously
and let herself be carried on and on into the unknown
undefiled by vile experiences, were less certain,
had wavered threateningly. She tried to read
something in his face, in that energetic kindly face
to which she had become accustomed so soon.
But she was not yet capable of understanding its expression.
Scared, discouraged on the threshold of adolescence,
plunged in moral misery of the bitterest kind, she
had not learned to read not that sort of
language.
If Anthony’s love had been as
egoistic as love generally is, it would have been
greater than the egoism of his vanity or
of his generosity, if you like and all
this could not have happened. He would not have
hit upon that renunciation at which one does not know
whether to grin or shudder. It is true too that
then his love would not have fastened itself upon
the unhappy daughter of de Barral. But it was
a love born of that rare pity which is not akin to
contempt because rooted in an overwhelmingly strong
capacity for tenderness the tenderness of
the fiery kind the tenderness of silent
solitary men, the voluntary, passionate outcasts of
their kind. At the time I am forced to think
that his vanity must have been enormous.
“What big eyes she has,”
he said to himself amazed. No wonder. She
was staring at him with all the might of her soul
awakening slowly from a poisoned sleep, in which it
could only quiver with pain but could neither expand
nor move. He plunged into them breathless and
tense, deep, deep, like a mad sailor taking a desperate
dive from the masthead into the blue unfathomable
sea so many men have execrated and loved at the same
time. And his vanity was immense. It had
been touched to the quick by that muscular little
feminist, Fyne. “I! I! Take
advantage of her helplessness. I! Unfair
to that creature that wisp of mist, that
white shadow homeless in an ugly dirty world.
I could blow her away with a breath,” he was
saying to himself with horror. “Never!”
All the supremely refined delicacy of tenderness,
expressed in so many fine lines of verse by Carleon
Anthony, grew to the size of a passion filling with
inward sobs the big frame of the man who had never
in his life read a single one of those famous sonnets
singing of the most highly civilized, chivalrous love,
of those sonnets which . . . You know there’s
a volume of them. My edition has the portrait
of the author at thirty, and when I showed it to Mr.
Powell the other day he exclaimed: “Wonderful!
One would think this the portrait of Captain Anthony
himself if . . .” I wanted to know what
that if was. But Powell could not say.
There was something a difference.
No doubt there was in fineness perhaps.
The father, fastidious, cerebral, morbidly shrinking
from all contacts, could only sing in harmonious numbers
of what the son felt with a dumb and reckless sincerity.
Possessed by most strong men’s
touching illusion as to the frailness of women and
their spiritual fragility, it seemed to Anthony that
he would be destroying, breaking something very precious
inside that being. In fact nothing less than
partly murdering her. This seems a very extreme
effect to flow from Fyne’s words. But Anthony,
unaccustomed to the chatter of the firm earth, never
stayed to ask himself what value these words could
have in Fyne’s mouth. And indeed the mere
dark sound of them was utterly abhorrent to his native
rectitude, sea-salted, hardened in the winds of wide
horizons, open as the day.
He wished to blurt out his indignation
but she regarded him with an expectant air which checked
him. His visible discomfort made her uneasy.
He could only repeat “Oh yes. You are perfectly
honest. You might have, but I dare say you are
right. At any rate you have never said anything
to me which you didn’t mean.”
“Never,” she whispered after a pause.
He seemed distracted, choking with
an emotion she could not understand because it resembled
embarrassment, a state of mind inconceivable in that
man.
She wondered what it was she had said;
remembering that in very truth she had hardly spoken
to him except when giving him the bare outline of her
story which he seemed to have hardly had the patience
to hear, waving it perpetually aside with exclamations
of horror and anger, with fiercely sombre mutters
“Enough! Enough!” and with alarming
starts from a forced stillness, as though he meant
to rush out at once and take vengeance on somebody.
She was saying to herself that he caught her words
in the air, never letting her finish her thought.
Honest. Honest. Yes certainly she had
been that. Her letter to Mrs. Fyne had been prompted
by honesty. But she reflected sadly that she
had never known what to say to him. That perhaps
she had nothing to say.
“But you’ll find out that
I can be honest too,” he burst out in a menacing
tone, she had learned to appreciate with an amused
thrill.
She waited for what was coming.
But he hung in the wind. He looked round the
room with disgust as if he could see traces on the
walls of all the casual tenants that had ever passed
through it. People had quarrelled in that room;
they had been ill in it, there had been misery in
that room, wickedness, crime perhaps death
most likely. This was not a fit place.
He snatched up his hat. He had made up his mind.
The ship the ship he had known ever since
she came off the stocks, his home her shelter the
uncontaminated, honest ship, was the place.
“Let us go on board. We’ll
talk there,” he said. “And you will
have to listen to me. For whatever happens,
no matter what they say, I cannot let you go.”
You can’t say that (misgivings
or no misgivings) she could have done anything else
but go on board. It was the appointed business
of that morning. During the drive he was silent.
Anthony was the last man to condemn conventionally
any human being, to scorn and despise even deserved
misfortune. He was ready to take old de Barral the
convict on his daughter’s valuation
without the slightest reserve. But love like
his, though it may drive one into risky folly by the
proud consciousness of its own strength, has a sagacity
of its own. And now, as if lifted up into a
higher and serene region by its purpose of renunciation,
it gave him leisure to reflect for the first time
in these last few days. He said to himself:
“I don’t know that man. She does
not know him either. She was barely sixteen when
they locked him up. She was a child. What
will he say? What will he do? No, he concluded,
I cannot leave her behind with that man who would
come into the world as if out of a grave.
They went on board in silence, and
it was after showing her round and when they had returned
to the saloon that he assailed her in his fiery, masterful
fashion. At first she did not understand.
Then when she understood that he was giving her her
liberty she went stiff all over, her hand resting
on the edge of the table, her face set like a carving
of white marble. It was all over. It was
as that abominable governess had said. She was
insignificant, contemptible. Nobody could love
her. Humiliation clung to her like a cold shroud never
to be shaken off, unwarmed by this madness of generosity.
“Yes. Here. Your
home. I can’t give it to you and go away,
but it is big enough for us two. You need not
be afraid. If you say so I shall not even look
at you. Remember that grey head of which you
have been thinking night and day. Where is it
going to rest? Where else if not here, where
nothing evil can touch it. Don’t you understand
that I won’t let you buy shelter from me at
the cost of your very soul. I won’t.
You are too much part of me. I have found myself
since I came upon you and I would rather sell my own
soul to the devil than let you go out of my keeping.
But I must have the right.”
He went away brusquely to shut the
door leading on deck and came back the whole length
of the cabin repeating:
“I must have the legal right.
Are you ashamed of letting people think you are my
wife?”
He opened his arms as if to clasp
her to his breast but mastered the impulse and shook
his clenched hands at her, repeating: “I
must have the right if only for your father’s
sake. I must have the right. Where would
you take him? To that infernal cardboard box-maker.
I don’t know what keeps me from hunting him
up in his virtuous home and bashing his head in.
I can’t bear the thought. Listen to me,
Flora! Do you hear what I am saying to you?
You are not so proud that you can’t understand
that I as a man have my pride too?”
He saw a tear glide down her white
cheek from under each lowered eyelid. Then, abruptly,
she walked out of the cabin. He stood for a moment,
concentrated, reckoning his own strength, interrogating
his heart, before he followed her hastily. Already
she had reached the wharf.
At the sound of his pursuing footsteps
her strength failed her. Where could she escape
from this? From this new perfidy of life taking
upon itself the form of magnanimity. His very
voice was changed. The sustaining whirlwind
had let her down, to stumble on again, weakened by
the fresh stab, bereft of moral support which is wanted
in life more than all the charities of material help.
She had never had it. Never. Not from
the Fynes. But where to go? Oh yes, this
dock a placid sheet of water close at hand.
But there was that old man with whom she had walked
hand in hand on the parade by the sea. She seemed
to see him coming to meet her, pitiful, a little greyer,
with an appealing look and an extended, tremulous
arm. It was for her now to take the hand of that
wronged man more helpless than a child. But where
could she lead him? Where? And what was
she to say to him? What words of cheer, of courage
and of hope? There were none. Heaven and
earth were mute, unconcerned at their meeting.
But this other man was coming up behind her.
He was very close now. His fiery person seemed
to radiate heat, a tingling vibration into the atmosphere.
She was exhausted, careless, afraid to stumble, ready
to fall. She fancied she could hear his breathing.
A wave of languid warmth overtook her, she seemed
to lose touch with the ground under her feet; and
when she felt him slip his hand under her arm she
made no attempt to disengage herself from that grasp
which closed upon her limb, insinuating and firm.
He conducted her through the dangers
of the quayside. Her sight was dim. A moving
truck was like a mountain gliding by. Men passed
by as if in a mist; and the buildings, the sheds,
the unexpected open spaces, the ships, had strange,
distorted, dangerous shapes. She said to herself
that it was good not to be bothered with what all these
things meant in the scheme of creation (if indeed
anything had a meaning), or were just piled-up matter
without any sense. She felt how she had always
been unrelated to this world. She was hanging
on to it merely by that one arm grasped firmly just
above the elbow. It was a captivity. So
be it. Till they got out into the street and
saw the hansom waiting outside the gates Anthony spoke
only once, beginning brusquely but in a much gentler
tone than she had ever heard from his lips.
“Of course I ought to have known
that you could not care for a man like me, a stranger.
Silence gives consent. Yes? Eh?
I don’t want any of that sort of consent.
And unless some day you find you can speak . . .
No! No! I shall never ask you. For
all the sign I will give you you may go to your grave
with sealed lips. But what I have said you must
do!”
He bent his head over her with tender
care. At the same time she felt her arm pressed
and shaken inconspicuously, but in an undeniable manner.
“You must do it.” A little shake
that no passer-by could notice; and this was going
on in a deserted part of the dock. “It
must be done. You are listening to me eh?
or would you go again to my sister?”
His ironic tone, perhaps from want
of use, had an awful grating ferocity.
“Would you go to her?”
he pursued in the same strange voice. “Your
best friend! And say nicely I am
sorry. Would you? No! You couldn’t.
There are things that even you, poor dear lost girl,
couldn’t stand. Eh? Die rather.
That’s it. Of course. Or can you
be thinking of taking your father to that infernal
cousin’s house. No! Don’t speak.
I can’t bear to think of it. I would
follow you there and smash the door!”
The catch in his voice astonished
her by its resemblance to a sob. It frightened
her too. The thought that came to her head was:
“He mustn’t.” He was putting
her into the hansom. “Oh! He mustn’t,
he mustn’t.” She was still more
frightened by the discovery that he was shaking all
over. Bewildered, shrinking into the far off
corner, avoiding his eyes, she yet saw the quivering
of his mouth and made a wild attempt at a smile, which
broke the rigidity of her lips and set her teeth chattering
suddenly.
“I am not coming with you,”
he was saying. “I’ll tell the man
. . . I can’t. Better not.
What is it? Are you cold? Come! What
is it? Only to go to a confounded stuffy room,
a hole of an office. Not a quarter of an hour.
I’ll come for you in ten days.
Don’t think of it too much. Think of no
man, woman or child of all that silly crowd cumbering
the ground. Don’t think of me either.
Think of yourself. Ha! Nothing will be
able to touch you then at last. Say
nothing. Don’t move. I’ll have
everything arranged; and as long as you don’t
hate the sight of me and you don’t there’s
nothing to be frightened about. One of their
silly offices with a couple of ink-slingers of no
consequence; poor, scribbling devils.”
The hansom drove away with Flora de
Barral inside, without movement, without thought,
only too glad to rest, to be alone and still moving
away without effort, in solitude and silence.
Anthony roamed the streets for hours
without being able to remember in the evening where
he had been in the manner of a happy and
exulting lover. But nobody could have thought
so from his face, which bore no signs of blissful
anticipation. Exulting indeed he was but it was
a special sort of exultation which seemed to take
him by the throat like an enemy.
Anthony’s last words to Flora
referred to the registry office where they were married
ten days later. During that time Anthony saw
no one or anything, though he went about restlessly,
here and there, amongst men and things. This
special state is peculiar to common lovers, who are
known to have no eyes for anything except for the contemplation,
actual or inward, of one human form which for them
contains the soul of the whole world in all its beauty,
perfection, variety and infinity. It must be
extremely pleasant. But felicity was denied to
Roderick Anthony’s contemplation. He was
not a common sort of lover; and he was punished for
it as if Nature (which it is said abhors a vacuum)
were so very conventional as to abhor every sort of
exceptional conduct. Roderick Anthony had begun
already to suffer. That is why perhaps he was
so industrious in going about amongst his fellowmen
who would have been surprised and humiliated, had
they known how little solidity and even existence
they had in his eyes. But they could not suspect
anything so queer. They saw nothing extraordinary
in him during that fortnight. The proof of this
is that they were willing to transact business with
him. Obviously they were; since it is then that
the offer of chartering his ship for the special purpose
of proceeding to the Western Islands was put in his
way by a firm of shipbrokers who had no doubt of his
sanity.
He probably looked sane enough for
all the practical purposes of commercial life.
But I am not so certain that he really was quite sane
at that time.
However, he jumped at the offer.
Providence itself was offering him this opportunity
to accustom the girl to sea-life by a comparatively
short trip. This was the time when everything
that happened, everything he heard, casual words,
unrelated phrases, seemed a provocation or an encouragement,
confirmed him in his resolution. And indeed to
be busy with material affairs is the best preservative
against reflection, fears, doubts all these
things which stand in the way of achievement.
I suppose a fellow proposing to cut his throat would
experience a sort of relief while occupied in stropping
his razor carefully.
And Anthony was extremely careful
in preparing for himself and for the luckless Flora,
an impossible existence. He went about it with
no more tremors than if he had been stuffed with rags
or made of iron instead of flesh and blood.
An existence, mind you, which, on shore, in the thick
of mankind, of varied interests, of distractions, of
infinite opportunities to preserve your distance from
each other, is hardly conceivable; but on board ship,
at sea, en tete-a-tete for days and weeks and
months together, could mean nothing but mental torture,
an exquisite absurdity of torment. He was a
simple soul. His hopelessly masculine ingenuousness
is displayed in a touching way by his care to procure
some woman to attend on Flora. The condition
of guaranteed perfect respectability gave him moments
of anxious thought. When he remembered suddenly
his steward’s wife he must have exclaimed eureka
with particular exultation. One does not like
to call Anthony an ass. But really to put any
woman within scenting distance of such a secret and
suppose that she would not track it out!
No woman, however simple, could be
as ingenuous as that. I don’t know how
Flora de Barral qualified him in her thoughts when
he told her of having done this amongst other things
intended to make her comfortable. I should think
that, for all her simplicity, she must have
been appalled. He stood before her on the appointed
day outwardly calmer than she had ever seen him before.
And this very calmness, that scrupulous attitude
which he felt bound in honour to assume then and for
ever, unless she would condescend to make a sign at
some future time, added to the heaviness of her heart
innocent of the most pardonable guile.
The night before she had slept better
than she had done for the past ten nights. Both
youth and weariness will assert themselves in the end
against the tyranny of nerve-racking stress.
She had slept but she woke up with her eyes full of
tears. There were no traces of them when she
met him in the shabby little parlour downstairs.
She had swallowed them up. She was not going
to let him see. She felt bound in honour to
accept the situation for ever and ever unless . . .
Ah, unless . . . She dissembled all her sentiments
but it was not duplicity on her part. All she
wanted was to get at the truth; to see what would come
of it.
She beat him at his own honourable
game and the thoroughness of her serenity disconcerted
Anthony a bit. It was he who stammered when it
came to talking. The suppressed fierceness of
his character carried him on after the first word
or two masterfully enough. But it was as if they
both had taken a bite of the same bitter fruit.
He was thinking with mournful regret not unmixed
with surprise: “That fellow Fyne has been
telling me the truth. She does not care for me
a bit.” It humiliated him and also increased
his compassion for the girl who in this darkness of
life, buffeted and despairing, had fallen into the
grip of his stronger will, abandoning herself to his
arms as on a night of shipwreck. Flora on her
side with partial insight (for women are never blind
with the complete masculine blindness) looked on him
with some pity; and she felt pity for herself too.
It was a rejection, a casting out; nothing new to
her. But she who supposed all her sensibility
dead by this time, discovered in herself a resentment
of this ultimate betrayal. She had no resignation
for this one. With a sort of mental sullenness
she said to herself: “Well, I am here.
I am here without any nonsense. It is not my
fault that I am a mere worthless object of pity.”
And these things which she could tell
herself with a clear conscience served her better
than the passionate obstinacy of purpose could serve
Roderick Anthony. She was much more sure of herself
than he was. Such are the advantages of mere
rectitude over the most exalted generosity.
And so they went out to get married,
the people of the house where she lodged having no
suspicion of anything of the sort. They were
only excited at a “gentleman friend” (a
very fine man too) calling on Miss Smith for the first
time since she had come to live in the house.
When she returned, for she did come back alone, there
were allusions made to that outing. She had
to take her meals with these rather vulgar people.
The woman of the house, a scraggy, genteel person,
tried even to provoke confidences. Flora’s
white face with the deep blue eyes did not strike
their hearts as it did the heart of Captain Anthony,
as the very face of the suffering world. Her
pained reserve had no power to awe them into decency.
Well, she returned alone as
in fact might have been expected. After leaving
the Registry Office Flora de Barral and Roderick Anthony
had gone for a walk in a park. It must have
been an East-End park but I am not sure. Anyway
that’s what they did. It was a sunny day.
He said to her: “Everything I have in
the world belongs to you. I have seen to that
without troubling my brother-in-law. They have
no call to interfere.”
She walked with her hand resting lightly
on his arm. He had offered it to her on coming
out of the Registry Office, and she had accepted it
silently. Her head drooped, she seemed to be
turning matters over in her mind. She said,
alluding to the Fynes: “They have been very
good to me.” At that he exclaimed:
“They have never understood
you. Well, not properly. My sister is not
a bad woman, but . . . "
Flora didn’t protest; asking
herself whether he imagined that he himself understood
her so much better. Anthony dismissing his family
out of his thoughts went on: “Yes.
Everything is yours. I have kept nothing back.
As to the piece of paper we have just got from that
miserable quill-driver if it wasn’t for the
law, I wouldn’t mind if you tore it up here,
now, on this spot. But don’t you do it.
Unless you should some day feel that ”
He choked, unexpectedly. She,
reflective, hesitated a moment then making up her
mind bravely.
“Neither am I keeping anything back from you.”
She had said it! But he in his
blind generosity assumed that she was alluding to
her deplorable history and hastened to mutter:
“Of course! Of course!
Say no more. I have been lying awake thinking
of it all no end of times.”
He made a movement with his other
arm as if restraining himself from shaking an indignant
fist at the universe; and she never even attempted
to look at him. His voice sounded strangely,
incredibly lifeless in comparison with these tempestuous
accents that in the broad fields, in the dark garden
had seemed to shake the very earth under her weary
and hopeless feet.
She regretted them. Hearing
the sigh which escaped her Anthony instead of shaking
his fist at the universe began to pat her hand resting
on his arm and then desisted, suddenly, as though
he had burnt himself. Then after a silence:
“You will have to go by yourself
to-morrow. I . . . No, I think I mustn’t
come. Better not. What you two will have
to say to each other ”
She interrupted him quickly:
“Father is an innocent man. He was cruelly
wronged.”
“Yes. That’s why,”
Anthony insisted earnestly. “And you are
the only human being that can make it up to him.
You alone must reconcile him with the world if anything
can. But of course you shall. You’ll
have to find words. Oh you’ll know.
And then the sight of you, alone, would soothe ”
“He’s the gentlest of men,” she
interrupted again.
Anthony shook his head. “It
would take no end of generosity, no end of gentleness
to forgive such a dead set. For my part I would
have liked better to have been killed and done with
at once. It could not have been worse for you and
I suppose it was of you that he was thinking most
while those infernal lawyers were badgering him in
court. Of you. And now I think of it perhaps
the sight of you may bring it all back to him.
All these years, all these years and you
his child left alone in the world. I would have
gone crazy. For even if he had done wrong ”
“But he hasn’t,”
insisted Flora de Barral with a quite unexpected fierceness.
“You mustn’t even suppose it. Haven’t
you read the accounts of the trial?”
“I am not supposing anything,”
Anthony defended himself. He just remembered
hearing of the trial. He assured her that he
was away from England, the second voyage of the Ferndale.
He was crossing the Pacific from Australia at the
time and didn’t see any papers for weeks and
weeks. He interrupted himself to suggest:
“You had better tell him at once that you are
happy.”
He had stammered a little, and Flora
de Barral uttered a deliberate and concise “Yes.”
A short silence ensued. She
withdrew her hand from his arm. They stopped.
Anthony looked as if a totally unexpected catastrophe
had happened.
“Ah,” he said. “You mind .
. . "
“No! I think I had better,” she
murmured.
“I dare say. I dare say.
Bring him along straight on board to-morrow.
Stop nowhere.”
She had a movement of vague gratitude,
a momentary feeling of peace which she referred to
the man before her. She looked up at Anthony.
His face was sombre. He was miles away and
muttered as if to himself:
“Where could he want to stop though?”
“There’s not a single
being on earth that I would want to look at his dear
face now, to whom I would willingly take him,”
she said extending her hand frankly and with a slight
break in her voice, “but you Roderick.”
He took that hand, felt it very small
and delicate in his broad palm.
“That’s right. That’s
right,” he said with a conscious and hasty heartiness
and, as if suddenly ashamed of the sound of his voice,
turned half round and absolutely walked away from
the motionless girl. He even resisted the temptation
to look back till it was too late. The gravel
path lay empty to the very gate of the park.
She was gone vanished. He had an
impression that he had missed some sort of chance.
He felt sad. That excited sense of his own conduct
which had kept him up for the last ten days buoyed
him no more. He had succeeded!
He strolled on aimlessly a prey to
gentle melancholy. He walked and walked.
There were but few people about in this breathing
space of a poor neighbourhood. Under certain
conditions of life there is precious little time left
for mere breathing. But still a few here and
there were indulging in that luxury; yet few as they
were Captain Anthony, though the least exclusive of
men, resented their presence. Solitude had been
his best friend. He wanted some place where he
could sit down and be alone. And in his need
his thoughts turned to the sea which had given him
so much of that congenial solitude. There, if
always with his ship (but that was an integral part
of him) he could always be as solitary as he chose.
Yes. Get out to sea!
The night of the town with its strings
of lights, rigid, and crossed like a net of flames,
thrown over the sombre immensity of walls, closed round
him, with its artificial brilliance overhung by an
emphatic blackness, its unnatural animation of a restless,
overdriven humanity. His thoughts which somehow
were inclined to pity every passing figure, every single
person glimpsed under a street lamp, fixed themselves
at last upon a figure which certainly could not have
been seen under the lamps on that particular night.
A figure unknown to him. A figure shut up within
high unscaleable walls of stone or bricks till next
morning . . . The figure of Flora de Barral’s
father. De Barral the financier the
convict.
There is something in that word with
its suggestions of guilt and retribution which arrests
the thought. We feel ourselves in the presence
of the power of organized society a thing
mysterious in itself and still more mysterious in
its effect. Whether guilty or innocent, it was
as if old de Barral had been down to the Nether Regions.
Impossible to imagine what he would bring out from
there to the light of this world of uncondemned men.
What would he think? What would he have to say?
And what was one to say to him?
Anthony, a little awed, as one is
by a range of feelings stretching beyond one’s
grasp, comforted himself by the thought that probably
the old fellow would have little to say. He
wouldn’t want to talk about it. No man
would. It must have been a real hell to him.
And then Anthony, at the end of the
day in which he had gone through a marriage ceremony
with Flora de Barral, ceased to think of Flora’s
father except, as in some sort, the captive of his
triumph. He turned to the mental contemplation
of the white, delicate and appealing face with great
blue eyes which he had seen weep and wonder and look
profoundly at him, sometimes with incredulity, sometimes
with doubt and pain, but always irresistible in the
power to find their way right into his breast, to
stir there a deep response which was something more
than love he said to himself, as
men understand it. More? Or was it only
something other? Yes. It was something
other. More or less. Something as incredible
as the fulfilment of an amazing and startling dream
in which he could take the world in his arms all
the suffering world not to possess its
pathetic fairness but to console and cherish its sorrow.
Anthony walked slowly to the ship
and that night slept without dreams.