Yet Dr. James Studdiford, walking
down to his club, an hour later, with the memory of
his aunt’s joyous congratulations ringing in
his ears, and of Julia’s last warm little kiss
upon his cheek, was perhaps more miserable than he
had been before in the course of his life. Julia
was his girl — his own girl — and
the thrill of her submission, the enchanting realization
that she loved him, rose over and over again in his
heart, like the rising of deep waters — only
to wash against the firm barrier of that hideous Fact.
Jim could do nothing with the Fact.
It did not seem to belong to him, or to Julia, to
their love and future together, or to her gallant,
all-enduring past. Julia was Julia — that
was the only significant thing, the sweetest, purest,
cleverest woman he knew. And she loved him!
A rush of ecstasy flooded his whole being; how sweet
she was when he made her say she loved him — when
she surrendered her hands, when she raised her gravely
smiling blue eyes! What a little wife she would
be, what a gay little comrade, and some day, perhaps,
what a mother!
Again the Fact. After such a
little interval of radiant peace it seemed to descend
upon him with an ugly violence. It was true; nothing
that they could do now would alter it. And, of
course, the thing was serious. If anything in
life was serious, this was. It was frightful — it
seemed sacrilegious to connect such things for an
instant with Julia. Dear little Julia, with her
crisp little uniforms, her authority in the classroom,
her charming deference to Aunt Sanna! And she
loved him —
“Damn it, the thing either counts
or it doesn’t count!” Jim muttered, striding
down Market Street, past darkened shops and corners
where lights showed behind the swinging doors of saloons.
Either it was all important or it was not important
at all. With most women, all important, of course.
With Julia — Jim let his mind play for a few
minutes with the thought of renunciation. There
would be no trouble with Julia, and Aunt Sanna could
easily be silenced.
He shook the mere vision from him
with an angry shake of the head. She belonged
to him now, his little steadfast, serious girl.
And she had deceived them all these years! Not
that he could blame her for it! Naturally, Aunt
Sanna would never have overlooked that, and presumably
no other woman would have engaged her, knowing it,
even to wash dishes and sweep steps.
“Lord, what a world for women!”
thought Jim, in simple wonder. Hunted down mercilessly,
pushed at the first sign of weakening, they know not
where, and then lost! Hundreds of thousands of
them forever outcast, to pay through all the years
that are left to them for that hour of yielding!
Hundreds of thousands of them, and his Julia only different
because she had made herself so —
It seemed to Jim, in his club now,
and sunk in a deep chair before the wood fire in the
quiet library, that he could never marry her.
It must simply be his sorrow to have loved Julia — God,
how he did love her!
But, through all their years together,
there must not be that shadow upon their happiness;
it was too hideous to be endured. “It must
be endured,” mused Jim wretchedly. “It
is true!
“Anyway,” he went on presently,
rousing himself, “the thing is no more important
than I choose to make it. Ordinarily, yes.
But in this case the thing to be considered is its
effect on Julia’s character, and if ever any
soul was pure, hers is!
“And if we marry, we must simply
make up our minds that the past is dead!” And
suddenly Jim’s heart grew lighter, and the black
mood of the past hour seemed to drop. He stretched
himself luxuriously and folded his arms. “If
Julia isn’t a hundred per cent, sweeter and better
and finer than these friends of Babbie’s, who
go chasing about to bad plays and read all the rottenest
books that are printed,” he said, “then
there’s no such thing as a good woman! My
little girl — I’m not half worthy of
her, that’s the truth!”
“Hello, Jim!” said Gray
Babcock, coming in from the theatre, and stretching
his long cold hands over the dying fire. “We
thought you might come in to-night. Hazzard and
Tom Parley had a little party for Miss Manning, of
the ‘Dainty Duchess’ Company, you know — awfully
pretty girl, straight, too, they say. There were
a couple of other girls, and Roy Grinell — things
were just about starting up when I came away!”
Jim rose, and kicked the scattered
ends of a log toward the flame.
“I’ve not got much use
for Hazzard,” he observed, frowning.
Babcock gave a surprised and vacant laugh.
“Gosh! I thought all you people were good
friends!”
“Hazzard’s an ass,”
observed Jim irritably. “There are some
things that aren’t any too becoming to college
kids — however, you can forgive them!
But when it comes to an ass like Hazzard chasing to
every beauty show, and taking good little girls to
supper — ”
“Alice don’t care a whoop what he does,”
Babcock remarked hastily.
“Yes, so of course that makes
everything all right,” Jim said ironically.
But Mr. Babcock was in no mood to be critical of tones.
“Sure it does!” he agreed
contentedly. And when Jim had disgustedly departed,
he remained still staring into the fire, a pleased
smile upon his face.
Julia spent the next day in bed fighting
a threatened nervous breakdown, and Jim came to see
her at two o’clock, and they had a long and
memorable talk, with Jim’s chair drawn close
to the couch, and the girl’s lax hand in his
own. She had not slept all night, she told him,
and he suspected that she had spent much of the long
vigil in tears. Tears came again as she begged
a hundred times to set him free, but he quieted her
at last, and the old tragedy that had risen to haunt
them was laid. And if Julia felt a rush of blind
gratitude and hope when they sealed their new compact
with a kiss, Jim was no less happy — everything
had come out wonderfully, and he loved Julia not less,
but more than he had ever loved her. The facts
of her life, whatever they had been, had made her
what she was; now let them all be forgotten.
“Still, you are not sorry I told you, Jim?”
Julia asked.
“No, oh, no, dearest! If
only because you would have been sure to want to do
it sooner or later — it would have worried
you. But now I do know, Julie, you little Spartan!
And this ends it. We’ll never speak of it
again, and we’ll never think of it again.
You and I are the only two who know — And
we love each other. When all’s said and
done, it’s I that am not good enough for you,
darling, not worthy to tie your little shoe laces!”
“Oh, you!” Julia said, in great
content.
The rest followed, as Julia herself
said, like “a house-maid’s dream.”
Jim went home to tell his own people that night, and
the very next morning Julia, surprised and smiling,
took in at the door a trim little package that proved
to be a blue-and-white Copenhagen teacup, with a card
that bore only the words “Miss Barbara Lowe Toland.”
Julia twisted it in her fingers with a curious little
thrill at the heart. The “nicest”
people sent cups to engaged girls, the “nicest”
people sent their cards innocent of scribbled messages.
She, Julia Page, was one of the “nicest”
people now, and these were the first tentacles of her
new estate reaching out to meet her.
Notes and flowers from the Tolands
and the warm-hearted Tolands themselves followed thick
and fast, and in a day or two notes and cups — cups — cups — were
coming from other people as well. The Misses
Saunders, the Harvey Brocks, the George Chickerings,
Mr. Peter Coleman, Mr. Jerome Phillips, Mrs. Arnold
Keith, and Miss Mary Peacock — all had found
time to go into Nathan Dohrmann’s, or Gump’s,
or the White House, and pick out a beautiful cup to
send Miss Julia Page.
Six weeks — five weeks — three
weeks to the wedding, sang Julia’s heart; the
time ran away. She had dreaded having to meet
Jim’s friends, and had dreaded some possible
embarrassment from an unexpected move on the part
of her own family, but the days fled by, and the miracle
of their happiness only expanded and grew sweeter,
like a great opening rose. Their hours together,
with so much to tell each other and so much to discuss,
no matter how short the parting had been, were hours
of exquisite delight. And as Julia’s beauty
and charm were praised on all sides, Jim beamed like
a proud boy. As for Julia, every day brought to
her notice something new to admire in this wonderful
lover of hers: his scowl as he fixed his engine,
the smile that always met hers, the instant soberness
and attention with which he answered any question as
to his work from the older doctor — all this
was delightful to her. And when he took her to
luncheon, his careless big fingers on the ready gold
pieces and his easy nod to the waiter were not lost
upon Julia. She had loved him for himself, but
it was additionally endearing to learn that other
people loved him, too, to be stopped by elderly women
who smiled and praised him, to have young people affectionately
interested in his plans.
“You know you are nothing but
a small boy, Jim,” Julia said one day, “just
a sweet, happy kid! You were a spoiled and pitied
little boy, with your big eyes and your velvet suits
and your patent leathers; you loved every one — every
one loved you; you had your allowance, you were born
to be a surgeon, and chance made your guardian a doctor — ”
“I fell down on my exams,”
Jim submitted meekly. “And there was a fellow
at college who said I bored him!”
“Oh, dearest,” Julia said,
beginning to laugh at his rueful face, “and
are those the worst things that ever happened to you?”
“About,” said Jim, enjoying
the consolatory little kiss she gave him.
“And your youngness baffles
me,” pursued Julia thoughtfully. “You’re
ten years older than I am, you’ve been able
to do a thousand things I never did, you’re
a rising young surgeon, and yet — and yet
sometimes there’s a sort of level — level
isn’t the word! — a sort of positive
youth about you that makes me feel eighty! It’s
just as if you had been born everything you are, ready
made! When you have to straighten a child’s
hip, you push your hair back like a nice little kid,
and say to yourself, ’Sure — I can
do that!’ You seem as pleased and surprised as
any one else when everything comes out right!”
“Well, gosh! I never can
put on any lugs!” said James, rumpling his hair
in penitential enjoyment.
“I have to learn things so hard,”
Julia mused, “they dig down right into the very
soul of me — ”
“You’re implying that
I’m shallow,” said the doctor sternly.
“You think I’m a pampered child of luxury,
but I’m not! I just think I’m a pretty
ordinary fellow who came in for an extraordinary line
of luck. I would have made a pretty good bluff
at supporting myself in any sort of life; as it was,
when I was a youngster, growing up, I used to say to
myself, ’You think you’re going to be
rich, but half the poor men in the world are born
rich, anything may happen!’ However, I enjoyed
things just the same, and I went to medical college
just because Dad said every man ought to be able to
support himself. Then I got interested in the
thing, and old Fox was a king to me, and told me I
ought to go in for surgery. My own father was
a surgeon, you know. Some hands are just naturally
better for it than others, and his were, and mine are.
And at twenty-five I came of age, and found that my
money was pretty safely fixed, and that Dad was kind
of counting on my going in with him. So there
you are! Things just come my way; as I say, I’d
have been satisfied with less, but I’ve got
in the habit of taking my luck for granted.”
“And some people, like — well,
like my grandmother, for instance, just get in the
habit of bad luck,” Julia said, with a sigh.
“And some, like myself,” she added, brightening,
“are born in the bad belt, and push into the
good! And we’re the really lucky ones!
I shall never put on a fresh frock, or go downtown
with you to the theatre, without a special separate
joy!”
Jim said, “You angel!”
and as she jumped up — they had been sitting
side by side in the hall at The Alexander — he
caught her around the waist, and Julia set a little
kiss on the top of his hair.
“But you do love me, Ju?” Jim asked.
“But I do indeed!” she
answered. “Why do you always ask me in that
argumentative sort of way? But me no buts!”
“Ah, well, it’s because
I’m always afraid you’ll stop!” Jim
pleaded. “And I do so want you to begin
to love me as much as I do you!”
“You must have had thousands
of girls!” Julia remarked, idly rumpling his
hair.
“I never was engaged before!”
he assured her promptly. “Except to that
Delaware girl, as I told you, and after five years
she threw me over for a boy named Gregory Biddle,
with several millions, but no chin, Julia, and had
the gall to ask me to the wedding!”
“Jim, and you went?”
“Sure I went!” Jim declared.
“Oh, Jim!” and Julia gave
him another kiss, through a gale of laughter, and
ran off to change her gown and put on her hat.
It was a Saturday afternoon, and they
were going to Sausalito. But first they went
downtown in the lazy soft spring afternoon, to buy
gloves for Julia and a scarf pin for Richie, who was
to be Jim’s best man, and to go into the big
railroad office to get tickets for the use of Dr. and
Mrs. James Studdiford three days later.
“Where are we going?”
Julia asked idly, her eyes moving about the bright
pigeonholed office, and to the window, and the street
beyond. Jim for answer put his thumb upon the
magic word that stared up at her from the long ticket.
“New York!” she whispered;
her radiant look flashed suddenly to him. “Oh,
Jim!” And as they went out he heard a little
sigh of utter content beside him. “It’s
too much!” said Julia. “To go to New
York — with you!”
“Wherever you go, you go with
me,” he reminded her, with a glance that brought
the swift colour to her face.
Then they went down to the boat.
It was the first hot afternoon of the season; there
was a general carrying of coats, and people were using
the deck seats; there was even some grumbling at the
heat. But Sausalito was at its loveliest, and
Julia felt almost oppressed by the exquisite promise
of summer that came with the sudden sound of laughter
and voices in lanes that had long been silent, and
with the odour of dying grass and drooping buttercups
beside the road. The Toland garden was full of
roses, bright in level sunshine, windows and doors
were all wide open, and the odours from bowls of flowers
drifted about the house. Barbara, lovely in white,
came to meet them.
“Come in, you poor things, you
must be roasted! Jim, you’re as red as a
beet; go take a bath!” said Barbara. “And
Julia, Aunt Sanna is here, and she says that you’re
to lie down for not less than an hour. And there
are some packages for you, so come up and lie down
on my bed, and we’ll open them!”
“Barbara, I am so happy I think
my heart will burst!” said Julia, ten minutes
later, from Barbara’s pillows.
“Well, you ought to be, my good
woman! Jim Studdiford — when he’s
sober — is as good a husband as you’re
likely to get!” said Barbara, laughing.
“Now, look, Julia, here’s a jam pot from
the Fowlers — Frederic Fowlers — I
call that decent of them! Janey, come in here
and put this jam pot down on Julia’s list!
And this heavy thing from the Penroses. I hope
to goodness it isn’t more carvers!”
It was Barbara who said later to Julia,
in a confidential undertone:
“You know you’ve got to
write personal notes for every bit of this stuff,
Julia, right away? Lots of girls do it on their
honeymoons.”
“Well, I wanted to ask you,
Barbara: how do I sign myself to these people
I’ve never seen: ’Yours truly’?”
“Oh, heavens, no! ‘Sincerely
yours’ or ‘Yours cordially’ and make
’em short. The shorter they are the smarter
they are, remember that.”
“And if I sign J. P. Studdiford,
or Julia P. Studdiford — then oughtn’t
‘Mrs. J. N.’ go in one corner?”
“Oh, no, you poor webfoot!
No. Just write a good splashy ’Julia Page
Studdiford’ all over the page; they’ll
know who you are fast enough!”
“Thanks,” said Julia shyly.
“You’re welcome,” Barbara said,
smiling. “Are you ready to go down?”
After dinner the young Tolands, augmented
by several young men, and by Julia and the doctor,
all wandered out into the thick darkness, rejoicing
in the return of summer. Sausalito’s lanes
were sweet with roses, lights shone out across the
deep fresh green of gardens, and lights moved on the
gently moving waters of the bay. A ferryboat,
a mass of checkered brightness, plowed its way from
Alcatraz — far off the city lay like a many-stranded
chain of glittering gems upon the water. Julia
and Doctor Studdiford let the others go on without
them, and sat together in the dim curve of the O’Connell
seat, and the heartbreaking beauty of the night wrapped
them both in a happiness so deep as to touch the borderland
of pain.
“Was there ever such a night?”
said little Julia. “Shall we ever be so
happy again?”
Jim could not see her clearly, but
he saw her bright, soft eyes in the gloom, the shimmer
of her loosened hair, the little white-clad figure
in the seat’s wide curve, and the crossed slim
ankles. He put his arm about her, and she rested
her head on his shoulder.
“Don’t say that, darling!”
said Jim. “This is great, of course.
But it’s nothing to all the happy months and
years that we’ll belong to each other.
Nothing but death will ever come between you and me,
Julie!”
“And I shouldn’t be afraid
of death,” murmured Julia, staring up at the
stars. “Strange — strange — strange
that we all must go that way some day!” she
mused.
“Well, please God, we’ll
do some living first,” Jim said, with healthy
anticipation. “We’ll go to New York,
and gad about, and go to Washington and Boston, and
pick up things here and there for the house, do you
see? Then we’ll come back here and go to
a hotel, and find a house and fix it up!”
“That’ll be fun,” said Julia.
“You bet your life it’ll
be fun! And then, my dear, we’ll give some
corking dinners, and my beautiful wife will wear blue
velvet, or white lace, or peachy silk — ”
“Or all three together,”
the prospective wife suggested, “with the flags
of all nations in my hair!”
“Then next year we’ll
visit old Gilchrist, at Monterey, and go up to Tahoe,”
continued Jim, unruffled. “Or we could take
some place in Ross — ”
“And then I will give a small
and select party for one guest,” said Julia
whimsically, “and board him, free, for fifteen
or twenty years — ”
“Julia, you little duck!”
Jim bent his head over her in the starlight, and felt
her soft hair brush his face, and caught the glint
of her laughing eyes close to his own, and the vague
delicious little perfume of youth and beauty and radiant
health that hung about her. “Do you know
that you are as cunning as a sassy kid?” he demanded.
“Now, kiss me once and for all, and no nonsense
about it, for I can hear the others coming back!”
Two days later they were married,
very quietly, in the little Church of Saint Charles
Borromeo, where Julia’s father and mother had
been married a quarter of a century ago. They
had “taken advantage,” as Julia said,
of her old grandfather’s death, and announced
that because the bride’s family was in mourning
the ceremony would be a very quiet one. Even the
press was not notified; the Tolands filled two pews,
and two more were filled by Julia’s mother,
her grandmother, and cousins. Kennedy Scott Marbury
and her husband were there, and sturdy two-year-old
Scott Marbury, who was much interested in this extraordinary
edifice and impressive proceeding, but there were
no other witnesses. Julia wore a dark-blue gown,
and a wide black hat whose lacy brim cast a most becoming
shadow over her lovely, serious face. She and
Miss Toland drove from the settlement house, and stopped
to pick up Mrs. Page, who was awed by Julia’s
dignity, and a little resentful of the way in which
others had usurped her place with her daughter.
However, Emeline had very wisely decided to make the
best of the situation, and treated Miss Toland with
stiff politeness. Julia was in a smiling dream,
out of which she roused herself, at intervals, for
only a gentle, absent-minded “Yes” or
“No.”
“I tried to persuade her to
be married at the Cathedral, by His Grace,”
said Miss Toland to Mrs. Page. “But she
wanted it this way!”
“Well, I’m sure she feels
you’ve done too much for her as it is,”
Emeline said mincingly. “Now she must turn
around and return some of it!”
To this Miss Toland made no answer
except an outraged snort, and a closer pressure of
her fine, bony hand upon Julia’s warm little
fingers. They presently reached the church, and
Julia was in Barbara’s hands.
“You look lovely, darling, and
your hat is a dream!” said Barbara, who looked
very handsome herself, in her brown suit and flower-trimmed
hat. “We go upstairs, I think. Jim’s
here, nervous as a fish. You’re
wonderful — as calm! I’d simply
be in spasms. Ted was awful; you’d think
she had been married every day, but Robert — his
collar was wilted!”
They had reached the upper church
now, and Miss Toland and Mrs. Page followed the girls
down the long aisle to the altar. Julia saw her
little old grandmother, in an outrageous flowered bonnet,
and Evelyn who was a most successful modiste now,
and Marguerite, looking flushed and excited, with
her fat, apple-faced young husband, and three lumpy
little children. Also her Aunt May was there,
and some young people: Muriel, who was what Evelyn
had been at fifteen, and a toothless nine-year-old
Regina, in pink, and some boys. On the other side
were the elegant Tolands, the dear old doctor in an
aisle seat, with his hands, holding his eye-glasses
and his handkerchief, fallen on either knee; Ted lovely
in blue, Constance and Jane with Ned and Mrs. Ned,
frankly staring.
As Julia came down the aisle, with
a sudden nervous jump of her heart, she saw Jim and
Richie, who was limping badly, but without his crutch,
come toward her. The old priest came down the
altar steps at the same time. She and Jim listened
respectfully to a short address without hearing a
word of it, and found themselves saying the familiar
words without in the least sensing them. Julia
battled through the prayer with a vague idea that
she was losing a valuable opportunity to invoke the
blessing of God, but unable to think of anything but
the fact that the bride usually walked out of church
on the groom’s arm, and that St. Charles’s
aisle was long and rather dismal in the waning afternoon
light.
“Here, darling, in the vestry!”
Jim was whispering, smiling his dear, easy, reassuring
smile as he guided her to the nearby door. And
in a second they were all about her, her first kiss
on the wet cheek of Aunt Sanna, the second to her
mother — “Evelyn, you were a darling
to come way across the city, and Marguerite, you were
a darling to bring those precious angels” — and
then the old doctor’s kiss, and Richie’s
kiss, and a pressure from his big bony fingers.
Julia half knelt to embrace little Scott Marbury.
“He’s beautiful, Kennedy; no wonder you’re
proud!” And she tore her beautiful bunch of
roses apart, that each girl might have a few.
“I’ve got to get her to
the train!” Jim protested presently, trying
patiently to disengage his wife’s hands, eyes,
and attention. “Julia! Julia Studdiford!”
“Yes, I know!” Julia laughed,
and was snatched away, half laughing and half in tears,
and hurried down to the side street, where a carriage
was waiting. And here there was one more delay:
Chester Cox, a thin shambling figure, came forward
from a shadowy doorway, and rather timidly held out
his hand.
“I couldn’t get away until
jest now,” said Chester. “But of course
I wish you luck, Julia!”
“Why, it’s my uncle!”
Julia said, cordially clasping his hand. “Mr.
Cox — Doctor Studdiford. I’m so
glad you came, Chess!”
“Glad to know you, Mr. Cox,” Jim said
heartily.
“And I brought you a little
present; it ain’t much, but maybe you can use
it!” mumbled Chester, terribly embarrassed, and
with a nervous laugh handing Julia a rather large
package somewhat flimsily wrapped and tied.
“Oh, thank you!” Julia
said gratefully. And before she got in the carriage
she put her hand on Chester’s arm, and raised
her fresh, exquisite little face for a kiss.
“Now, about this — ”
Doctor Studdiford began delicately, glancing at Chester’s
gift, which Julia had given him to hold. “I
wonder if it wouldn’t be wise to ask your uncle
to send this to my mother’s until we get back,
Ju. You see, dear — ”
“Oh, no-no!” Julia said
eagerly, leaning out of the carriage, and taking the
package again. She sent Chester a last bright
smile, as Jim jumped in and slammed the door, but
it was an April face that she turned a second later
to her husband.
“They’re all so good to
me, and it just breaks my heart!” she said.
“At last — it’s
all over — and you belong to me!” exulted
Jim. “I have been longing and longing
for this, just to be alone with you, and have you
to myself. Are you tired, sweetheart?”
“No-o. Just a little — perhaps.”
“But you do love me?”
“Oh, Jim — you idiot!”
Julia slipped her hand into his, as he put one arm
about her, and rested against his shoulder. “When
I think that I will often ride in carriages,”
she mused, half smiling, “and that, besides
being my Jim, you are a rich man, it makes me feel
as if I were Cinderella!”
“You shall have your own carriage if you want
it, Pussy!” he smiled.
“Oh, don’t — don’t
give me anything more,” begged Julia, “or
a clock somewhere will strike twelve, and I’ll
wake up in The Alexander, with the Girls’ Club
rehearsing a play!”
When she had examined every inch of
her Pullman drawing-room, and commented upon one hundred
of its surprising conveniences, and when her smart
little travelling case, the groom’s gift, had
been partly unpacked, and when her blue eyes had refreshed
themselves with a long look at the rolling miles of
lovely San Mateo hills, then young Mrs. Studdiford
looked at her Uncle Chester’s wedding gift.
She found a brush and comb and mirror in pink celluloid,
with roses painted on them, locked with little brass
hasps into a case lined with yellow silk.
“Look, Jim!” said Julia
pitifully, not knowing whether to laugh or to cry.
“Gosh!” said the doctor
thoughtfully, looking over the coat he was neatly
arranging on a hanger. “I’ve often
wondered who buys those things!”
“I’ll give it to the porter,”
Julia decided. “He may like it. Dear
old Chess!” And Jim grinned indulgently a few
minutes later at the picture of his beautiful little
wife enslaving the old coloured porter, and gravely
discussing with him the advantages and disadvantages
of his work.
“You know, we could have our
meals in here, Ju,” Jim suggested. “Claude
here” — all porters were “Claude”
to Jim — “would take care of us, wouldn’t
you, Claude?”
“Dat I would!” said Claude
with husky fervour. But Julia’s face fell.
“Oh, Jim! But it would
be such fun to go out to the dining-car!” she
pleaded.
Jim shouted. “All right,
you baby!” he said. “You see, my wife’s
only a little girl,” he explained. “She’s — are
you eight or nine, Julia?”
“She sho’ don’t
look more’n dat,” Claude gallantly assured
them, as he departed.
“I’ll be twenty-four on
my next birthday,” Julia said thoughtfully, a
few moments later.
“Well, at that, you may live
three or four years more!” Jim consoled her.
“Do you know what time it is, Loveliness?
It’s twenty minutes past six. We’ve
been married exactly two hours and twenty minutes.
How do you like it?”
“I love it!” said Julia
boldly. “Do I have to change my dress for
dinner?”
“You do not.”
“But I ought to fix my hair,
it’s all mashed!” Julia did wonders to
it with one of the ivory-backed brushes that had come
with the new travelling case, fluffing the thick braids
and tucking the loose golden strands about her temples
trimly into place. Then she rubbed her face with
a towel, and jumped up to straighten her belt, and
run an investigating finger about the embroidered
“turn-down” collar that finished her blue
silk blouse. Finally she handed Jim her new whisk-broom
with a capable air, and presented straight little shoulders
to be brushed.
Jim turned her round and round, whisking
and straightening, and occasionally kissing the tip
of a pink ear, or the straight white line where her
hair parted.
“Here, you can’t keep
that up all night!” Julia suddenly protested,
grabbing the brush. “I’ll do you!”
But Jim stopped the performance by suddenly imprisoning
girl and whiskbroom in his arms.
“Do you know I think we are
going to have great fun!” said he. “You’re
such a good little sport, Ju! No nerves and no
nonsense about you! It’s such fun to do
things with a person who isn’t eternally fussing
about heat and cold, and whether she ought to wear
her gloves into the dining-car, and whether any one
will guess that she’s just married!”
“Oh, I have my nervous moments,”
Julia confessed, her eyes looking honestly up into
his. “It seems awfully strange and queer,
rushing farther and farther away from home, alone
with you!” Her voice sank a little; she put
up her arms and locked them about his neck. “I
have to keep reminding myself that you are just you,
Jim,” she said bravely, “who gave me my
Browning, and took me to tea at the Pheasant — and
then it all seems right again! And then — such
lots of nice people have got married, and gone
away on honeymoons,” she ended, argumentatively.
The laughter had gone from Jim’s
eyes; a look almost shy, almost ashamed, had taken
its place. He kept her as she was for a moment,
then gave her a serious kiss, and they went laughing
through the rocking cars to eat their first dinner
together as man and wife. And Jim watched her
as she radiantly settled herself at table, and watched
the frown of childish gravity with which she studied
her menu, with some new and tender emotion stirring
at his heart. Life had greater joys in it than
he had ever dreamed, and greater potentialities for
sorrow, too. What was bright in life was altogether
more gloriously bright, and what was dark seemed to
touch him more closely; he felt the sorrow of age in
the trembling old man at the table across the aisle,
the pathos of youth in the two young travelling salesmen
who chattered so self-confidently over their meal.
Several weeks later young Mrs. Studdiford
wrote to Barbara that New York was “a captured
dream.” “I seem to belong to it,”
wrote Julia, “and it seems to belong to me!
I can’t tell you how it satisfies me;
it is good just to look down from my window at Fifth
Avenue, every morning, and say to myself, ‘I’m
still in New York!’ For the first two weeks Jim
and I did everything alone, like two children:
the new Hippodrome, and Coney Island, and the Liberty
Statue, and the Bronx Zoo. I never had
such a good time! We went to the theatres, and
the museums, and had breakfast at the Casino, and
lived on top of the green ’busses!
But now Jim has let some of his old college friends
know we are here, and we are spinning like tops.
One is an artist, and has the most fascinating studio
I ever saw, down on Washington Square, and another
is an editor, and gave us a tea in his rooms, overlooking
Stuyvesant Square, and Barbara, everybody there was
a celebrity (except us) and all so sweet and friendly — it
was a hot spring day, and the trees in the square were
all such a fresh, bright green.
“They make a great fuss about
the spring here, and you can hardly blame them.
The whole city turns itself inside out; people simply
stream to the parks, and the streets swarm with children.
Some of the poorer women go bareheaded or with shawls,
even in the cars — did you ever see a bareheaded
woman in a car at home? But they are all much
nearer the peasant here. And after clean San
Francisco, you wouldn’t believe how dirty this
place is; all the smaller stores have shops in the
basements, and enough dirt and old rags and wet paper
lying around to send Doctor Blue into a convulsion!
And they use pennies here, which seems so petty, and
paper dollars instead of silver, which I hate.
And you say ‘L’ or ‘sub’ for
the trains, and always ‘surface cars’ for
the regular cars — it’s all so different
and so interesting.
“Tell Richie Jim is going to
assist the great Doctor Cassell in some demonstrations
of bone transplanting, at Bellevue, next week — oh,
and Barbara, did I write Aunt Sanna that we met the
President! My dear, we did. We were at the
theatre with the Cassells, and saw him in a box, and
Doctor Cassell, the old darling, knows him, and went
to the President’s box to ask if we might be
brought in and presented, and, my dear, he got up
and came back with Doctor Cassell to our box, and was
simply sweet, and asked me if I wasn’t
from the South, and I nearly said, ’Yes, south
of Market Street,’ but refrained in time.
I had on the new apricot crepe, and a black hat, and
felt very Lily-like-a-princess, as Jane says.
“But we’re both getting
homesick; it will seem good to see the old ferry building
again — and Sausalito, and all of you.”
Early in July they did start homeward,
but by so circuitous a route, and with such prolonged
stops at the famous hotels of Canada, that it was on
a September afternoon that they found themselves taking
the Toland household by storm. And Julia thought
no experience in her travels so sweet as this one:
to be received into the heart of the family, and to
settle down to a review of the past five months.
Richie was so brotherly and kind, the girls so admiring
of her furs and her diamonds, so full of gay chatter,
the old doctor so gallant and so affectionate!
Mrs. Toland chirped and twittered like the happy mother
of a cageful of canaries; and Julia, when they gathered
about the fire after dinner, took a low stool next
to Miss Toland’s chair and rested a shoulder,
little-girl fashion, against the older woman’s
knee.
“It was simply a tour of triumph
for Ju,” said Doctor Jim, packing his pipe at
the fireplace, with satisfied eyes on his wife.
“She has friends in the Ghetto and friends in
the White House. We went down to the Duponts’,
on Long Island, and Dupont said she — ”
“Oh, please, Jim!” Julia said seriously.
“Dupont said she was one of
the most interesting women he ever talked to,”
Jim continued inexorably, “and John Mandrake
wanted to paint her!”
“Tell me the news!” begged
Julia. “How’s The Alexander, Aunt
Sanna — how is Miss Striker turning out?”
“She’s turned out,”
said Miss Toland grimly, her knitting needles flashing
steadily. “She came to me with her charts
and rules, and oh, she couldn’t lie in bed after
half-past six in the morning, and she couldn’t
put off the sewing class, and she would like to ask
me not to eat my breakfast after nine o’clock!
A girl who never cared what she ate — sardines
and tea! — and she wouldn’t come in
with me to dinner at the Colonial because she was
afraid they used coal tar and formaldehyde — ha!
Finally she asked me if I wouldn’t please keep
the expenditures of the house and my own expenditures
separate, and that was the end!”
Jim’s great laugh burst out,
and Julia dimpled as she asked demurely:
“What on earth did you say?”
“Say? I asked her if she
knew I built The Alexander, and sent her packing!
And now” — Miss Toland rubbed her nose
with the gesture Julia knew so well — “now
Miss Pierce is temporarily in charge, but she won’t
stay there nights, so the clubs are given up,”
she observed discontentedly.
“And what’s the news from Sally?”
Julia pursued.
“Just the loveliest in the world,”
Mrs. Toland said. “Keith is working like
a little Trojan; and Sally sent us a perfectly charming
description of the pension, and their walks — ”
“Yes, and how she couldn’t
go out because she hadn’t shoes,” Jane
added, half in malice, half in fun. “Don’t
look so shocked, Mother dear, you know it’s
true. And the landlady cheating them out of a
whole week’s board — ”
“Gracious me!” said Mrs.
Toland, in a low undertone full of annoyance.
“Did any one ever hear such nonsense! All
that is past history now, Janey,” she reminded
her young daughter, in her usual hopeful voice.
“Dad sent a cheque, like the dear, helpful daddy
he is, and now everything’s lovely again!”
Julia did not ask for Ted until she
saw Barbara alone for a moment the next day.
It was about ten o’clock on a matchless autumn
morning, and Julia, stepping from her bedroom’s
French window to the wide sunny porch that ran the
width of the house, saw Barbara some forty feet away
sitting just outside her own window, with a mass of
hair spread to the sun.
Julia joined her, dragged out a low,
light chair from Barbara’s room, and settled
herself for a gossip.
“Had breakfast?” Barbara smiled.
“Jim downstairs?”
“Oh, hours ago!” Julia
said to the first question, and to the second, with
the young wife’s conscious blush, “Jim’s
dressing. He’s the most impossible person
to get started in the morning!”
Barbara did not blush but she felt
a little tug at her heart.
“Come,” she said, “I thought Jim
had no faults?”
“Well, he hasn’t,”
Julia laughed. And then, a little confused by
her own fervent tone, she changed the subject, and
asked about Ted.
“Why, Ted’s happy, and
rich, and simply adored by Bob Carleton,” Barbara
summarized briefly, in a rather dry voice, “but
Mother and Dad never will get over it, and I suppose
Ted herself doesn’t like the idea of that other
wife — she lives at The Palace, and she’s
got a seven-year-old girl! It’s done,
you know, Julie, and of course Ted’s accepted
everywhere; she’ll go to the Brownings’
this year, and Mrs. Morton has asked her to receive
with her at some sort of dinner reception next month,
you’ll meet her everywhere. But I do think
it’s terribly hard on Mother and Dad!”
“But how could she, that great big black
creature?”
“Oh, she loves him fast enough!
It was perfectly legal, of course. I think Dad
was at the wedding, and I think Richie was, but we
girls never knew anything until it was all over.
Mother simply announced to us one night that Ted was
married, and that there was to be no open break, but
that she and Dad were just about sick!
I never saw Mother give way so! She said — and
it’s true — that if ever there was a
mother who deserved her children’s confidence,
and so on! All the newspapers blazed about it — Ted’s
picture, Bob’s picture — and, as I say,
society welcomed her with open arms. They’ve
got a gorgeous suite at the St. Francis, and Ted really
looks stunning, and acts as if she’d done something
very smart. Con says that when she called, it
reminded her of the second act of a bad play.
Ted came here with Bob, one Saturday afternoon, but
Mother hasn’t been near her!”
“It seems too bad,” Julia
said thoughtfully, “when your father and mother
are always so sweet!”
“There must be some reason for
it,” Barbara observed, “I suppose we were
all spoiled as kids, with our dancing schools and our
dresses from Paris, and so now when we want things
we oughtn’t have, we just take ’em, from
habit! I remember a governess once, a nice enough
little Danish woman, but Ned and I got together and
decided we wouldn’t stand her, and Mother let
her go. It seems funny now. Mother used to
say that never in her life did she allow her children
to want anything she could give them; but I’m
not at all sure that’s a very wise ideal!”
“Nor I,” said Julia earnestly.
Barbara had parted and brushed her dark hair now,
and as she gathered it back, the ruthless morning sunlight
showed lines on her pretty face and faint circles about
her eyes.
“Because life gets in and gives
you whacks,” Barbara presently pursued, “you’re
going to want a lot of things you can’t have
before you get through, and it only makes it harder!
Sally’s paying for her jump in the dark, poor
old Ned is condemned to Yolo City and Eva for the rest
of his life, and somehow Ted’s the saddest of
all — so confident and noisy and rich, boasting
about Bob’s affection, buying everything she
sees — and so young, somehow!
As for me,” said Barbara, “my only consolation
is that nearly every family has one of me, and some
have more — a nice-looking, well-liked, well-dressed
young woman, who has cost her parents an enormous
amount of money, to get — nowhere!”
“Why, Lady Babbie!” Julie
protested. “It’s not like you to talk
so!”
Barbara patted the hand that had been
laid upon her knee, and laughed.
“And the moral of that is, Ju,”
she said, “if you have children, don’t
spoil them! You’ve had horribly hard times,
but they’ve given you some sense. As for
Jim, he’s an exception. It’s a miracle
he wasn’t ruined — but he wasn’t!”
And she gathered up her towels and brushes to go back
into her room. “But I needn’t tell
you that, Julie!” said she.
“Ah, well, Jim!” Julia conceded, smiling.
Jim had no faults, of course.
Yet the five-months wife sighed unconsciously as she
went back to her room. Jim had qualities that
had now and then caused a faint little cloud to drift
across Julia’s life, but that sheer loyalty
had kept her from defining, even in her inmost heart.
Now this talk with Barbara had suddenly seemed to make
them clear. Jim was — spoiled was too
harsh a word. But Jim wanted his own way, in
little things and big — all the time.
The world just now for Jim held only Julia. What
she wanted he wanted, and, at any cost, he would have.
If her gown was not right for the special occasion,
she should have a new gown; if the motor car was out
of order, telephone for another; if the steward assured
them that there was not another table in the dining-room — tip
him, tip everybody, make a scene, but see that the
“Reserved” card comes off somebody’s
table, and that the Studdifords are seated there in
triumph.
At first Julia had only laughed at
her lord’s masterful progress. It was very
funny to her to see how quickly his money and his determination
won him his way. A great deal of money was wasted,
of course, but then, this was their honeymoon, and
some day they would settle down and spend rationally.
Jim, like all rich men, had an absolute faith in the
power of gold. The hall maid must come in and
hook Mrs. Studdiford’s gown; oh, and would she
be here at, say, one o’clock, when Mrs. Studdiford
came home? She went off at twelve, eh? Well,
what was it worth to her to stay on to-night, until
one? Good. And by the way, Mrs. Studdiford
had torn a lace gown and wanted it to-morrow; could
the maid mend it and press it? She didn’t
think so? Well, come, there must be somebody who
would rush it through for Mrs. Studdiford? Ah,
that was fine, thank you very much, that would do
very nicely. Or perhaps it was a question of theatre
tickets, and Jim would stop his taxicab on Broadway
at the theatre’s door. Here, boy!
Boy, come here! Go up and ask him what his best
for to-night are? There’s a line of people
waiting, eh? — well, go up and ask some fellow
at the top of the line what it’s worth to him
to get two seats for me. Oh, fine. Much
obliged to you, sir. Thank you. And here — boy!
“Do you think the entire world
circles about your convenience, Jim?” Julia
asked amusedly one day, after some such episode.
“Sure,” he answered, grinning.
“Jim, you don’t think
you can go through life walking over people this way?”
“Why not, my good lady?”
“Well,” said Julia gravely,
“some day you may find you want something you
can’t buy!”
“There ain’t no such animal,” Jim
assured her cheerfully.
Only a trifling cloud, after all,
Julia assured herself hardily. But there was
a constant little sensation of uneasiness in her heart.
She tried to convince herself that the sweetness of
his nature had not been undermined by this ability
to indulge himself however fast his fancies shifted;
she reasoned that because so many good things were
his, he need not necessarily hold them in light esteem.
Yet the thought persisted that he knew neither his
own mind nor his own heart; there had been no discipline
there, no hard-won battles — there were no
reserves.
“I call that simply borrowing
trouble!” said Kennedy Scott Marbury healthily,
one day when she and the tiny Scott were lunching with
Julia at the hotel. Kennedy was close to her
second confinement, and the ladies had lunched in
Julia’s handsome sitting-room. “Lord,
Julie dear! It seems sometimes as if you have
to have something in this world,” Kennedy
went on cheerfully; “either actual trouble or
mental worries! Anthony and I were talking finances
half last night: we decided that we can’t
move to a larger house, just now, and so on — and
we both said what would it be like to be free
from money worries for ten minutes — ”
“But, Ken, don’t you see
how necessary you are to each other!” said Julia,
kneeling before the chair in which her fat godson was
seated, and displaying a number of gold chains and
bracelets for his amusement. “You have
to take a turn at everything — cooking and
sewing and caring for old Sweetum here — Anthony
couldn’t get on without you!”
“And I suppose you think Doctor
Studdiford could find twenty wives as pretty and clever
and charming as you are, Ju?”
“Fifty!” Julia answered.
“Well, now, that just shows
what a little idiot you are!” Mrs. Marbury scolded.
“Not but what most women feel that way sooner
or later,” she added, less severely. “I
remember that phase very well, myself! But the
thing for you to do, Julie, is to remember that you’re
exactly the same woman he fell in love with, d’you
see? Just mind your own affairs, and be happy
and busy, and try not to fancy things!”
“What a sensible old thing you
are, Ken!” said Julia gratefully. And as
Kennedy came over to stand near her, Julia gave her
a little rub with her head, like an affectionate pony.
“I think it’s partly this hotel that’s
demoralizing me,” Julia went on, a little shamed.
“I feel so useless — getting up, eating,
dressing, idling about, and going to bed again.
Jim has his work, and I’ll be glad when I have
mine again!”