Harold told me the main facts of this
episode some time later, in bits, and with
reluctance. It was not a recollection he cared
to talk about. The crude blank misery of a moment
is apt to leave a dull bruise which is slow to depart,
if it ever does so entirely; and Harold confesses
to a twinge or two, still, at times, like the veteran
who brings home a bullet inside him from martial plains
over sea.
He knew he was a brute the moment
he had done it; Selina had not meant to worry, only
to comfort and assist. But his soul was one raw
sore within him, when he found himself shut up in
the schoolroom after hours, merely for insisting that
7 times 7 amounted to 47. The injustice of it
seemed so flagrant. Why not 47 as much as 49?
One number was no prettier than the other to look
at, and it was evidently only a matter of arbitrary
taste and preference, and, anyhow, it had always been
47 to him, and would be to the end of time. So
when Selina came in out of the sun, leaving the Trappers
or the Far West behind her, and putting off the glory
of being an Apache squaw in order to hear him his tables
and win his release, Harold turned on her venomously,
rejected her kindly overtures, and ever drove his
elbow into her sympathetic ribs, in his determination
to be left alone in the glory of sulks. The fit
passed directly, his eyes were opened, and his soul
sat in the dust as he sorrowfully began to cast about
for some atonement heroic enough to salve the wrong.
Of course poor Selina looked for no
sacrifice nor heroics whatever: she didn’t
even want him to say he was sorry. If he would
only make it up, she would have done the apologising
part herself. But that was not a boy’s
way. Something solid, Harold felt, was due from
him; and until that was achieved, making-up must not
be thought of, in order that the final effect might
not be spoilt. Accordingly, when his release came,
and poor Selina hung about, trying to catch his eye,
Harold, possessed by the demon of a distorted motive,
avoided her steadily though he was bleeding
inwardly at every minute of delay and came
to me instead. Needless to say, I approved his
plan highly; it was so much more high-toned than just
going and making-up tamely, which any one could do;
and a girl who had been jobbed in the ribs by a hostile
elbow could not be expected for a moment to overlook
it, without the liniment of an offering to soothe
her injured feelings.
“I know what she wants most,”
said Harold. “She wants that set of tea-things
in the toy-shop window, with the red and blue flowers
on ’em; she’s wanted it for months, ’cos
her dolls are getting big enough to have real afternoon
tea; and she wants it so badly that she won’t
walk that side of the street when we go into the town.
But it costs five shillings!”
Then we set to work seriously, and
devoted the afternoon to a realisation of assets and
the composition of a Budget that might have been dated
without shame from Whitehall. The result worked
out as follows:
s.
d.
By one uncle, unspent through having been
lost for nearly a week turned
up at last
in the straw of the dog-kennel . . . .
2 6
Carry forward,
2 6
s.
d.
Brought forward,
2
By advance from me on security of next
uncle, and failing that, to be called in
at
Christmas . . . . . . . . . . .
. 1
By shaken out of missionary-box with the
help of a knife-blade. (They were our
own pennies and a forced levy) . . . .
. 0
By bet due from Edward, for walking across
the field where Farmer Larkin’s bull
was,
and Edward bet him twopence he wouldn’t
called in with difficulty .
. . . . . 0
By advance from Martha, on no security at
all, only you mustn’t tell your aunt
. . . 1 0
Total
5 0
and at last we breathed again.
The rest promised to be easy.
Selina had a tea-party at five on the morrow, with
the chipped old wooden tea-things that had served her
successive dolls from babyhood. Harold would slip
off directly after dinner, going alone, so as not
to arouse suspicion, as we were not allowed to go
into the town by ourselves. It was nearly two
miles to our small metropolis, but there would be
plenty of time for him to go and return, even laden
with the olive-branch neatly packed in shavings; besides,
he might meet the butcher, who was his friend and would
give him a lift. Then, finally, at five, the
rapture of the new tea-service, descended from the
skies; and, retribution made, making-up at last, without
loss of dignity. With the event before us, we
thought it a small thing that twenty-four hours more
of alienation and pretended sulks must be kept up
on Harold’s part; but Selina, who naturally knew
nothing of the treat in store for her, moped for the
rest of the evening, and took a very heavy heart to
bed.
When next day the hour for action
arrived, Harold evaded Olympian attention with an
easy modesty born of long practice, and made off for
the front gate. Selina, who had been keeping her
eye upon him, thought he was going down to the pond
to catch frogs, a joy they had planned to share together,
and made after him; but Harold, though he heard her
footsteps, continued sternly on his high mission, without
even looking back; and Selina was left to wander disconsolately
among flower-beds that had lost for her all
scent and colour. I saw it all, and although
cold reason approved our line of action, instinct told
me we were brutes.
Harold reached the town so
he recounted afterwards in record time,
having run most of the way for fear the tea-things,
which had reposed six months in the window, should
be snapped up by some other conscience-stricken lacerator
of a sister’s feelings; and it seemed hardly
credible to find them still there, and their owner
willing to part with them for the price marked on
the ticket. He paid his money down at once, that
there should be no drawing back from the bargain; and
then, as the things had to be taken out of the window
and packed, and the afternoon was yet young, he thought
he might treat himself to a taste of urban joys and
la vie de Bohême. Shops came first, of course,
and he flattened his nose successively against the
window with the india-rubber balls in it, and the
clock-work locomotive; and against the barber’s
window, with wigs on blocks, reminding him of uncles,
and shaving-cream that looked so good to eat; and the
grocer’s window, displaying more currants than
the whole British population could possibly consume
without a special effort; and the window of the bank,
wherein gold was thought so little of that it was dealt
about in shovels. Next there was the market-place,
with all its clamorous joys; and when a runaway calf
came down the street like a cannon-ball, Harold felt
that he had not lived in vain. The whole place
was so brimful of excitement that he had quite forgotten
the why and the wherefore of his being there, when
a sight of the church clock recalled him to his better
self, and sent him flying out of the town, as he realised
he had only just time enough left to get back in.
If he were after his appointed hour, he would not
only miss his high triumph, but probably would be
detected as a transgressor of bounds, a
crime before which a private opinion on multiplication
sank to nothingness. So he jogged along on his
homeward way, thinking of many things, and probably
talking to himself a good deal, as his habit was,
and had covered nearly half the distance, when suddenly a
deadly sinking in the pit of his stomach a
paralysis of every limb around him a world
extinct of light and music a black sun
and a reeling sky he had forgotten the tea-things!
It was useless, it was hopeless, all
was over, and nothing could now be done; nevertheless
he turned and ran back wildly, blindly, choking with
the big sobs that evoked neither pity nor comfort from
a merciless mocking world around; a stitch in his
side, dust in his eyes, and black despair clutching
at his heart. So he stumbled on, with leaden legs
and bursting sides, till as if Fate had
not yet dealt him her last worst buffet on
turning a corner in the road he almost ran under the
wheels of a dog-cart, in which, as it pulled up, was
apparent the portly form of Farmer Larkin, the arch-enemy,
whose ducks he had been shying stones at that very
morning!
Had Harold been in his right and unclouded
senses, he would have vanished through the hedge some
seconds earlier, rather than pain the farmer by any
unpleasant reminiscences which his appearance might
call up; but as things were, he could only stand and
blubber hopelessly, caring, indeed, little now what
further ill might befall him. The farmer, for
his part, surveyed the desolate figure with some astonishment,
calling out in no unfriendly accents, “Why, Master
Harold! whatever be the matter? Baint runnin’
away, be ee?”
Then Harold, with the unnatural courage
born of desperation, flung himself on the step, and
climbing into the cart, fell in the straw at the bottom
of it, sobbing out that he wanted to go back, go back!
The situation had a vagueness; but the farmer, a man
of action rather than words, swung his horse round
smartly, and they were in the town again by the time
Harold had recovered himself sufficiently to furnish
some details. As they drove up to the shop, the
woman was waiting at the door with the parcel; and
hardly a minute seemed to have elapsed since the black
crisis, ere they were bowling along swiftly home, the
precious parcel hugged in a close embrace.
And now the farmer came out in quite
a new and unexpected light. Never a word did
he say of broken fences and hurdles, of trampled crops
and harried flocks and herds. One would have
thought the man had never possessed a head of live
stock in his life. Instead, he was deeply interested
in the whole dolorous quest of the tea-things, and
sympathised with Harold on the disputed point in mathematics
as if he had been himself at the same stage of education.
As they neared home, Harold found himself, to his
surprise, sitting up and chatting to his new friend
like man to man; and before he was dropped at a convenient
gap in the garden hedge, he had promised that when
Selina gave her first public tea-party, little Miss
Larkin should be invited to come and bring ha whole
sawdust family along with her; and the farmer appeared
as pleased and proud as if he hat been asked to a garden-party
at Marlborough House. Really, those Olympians
have certain good points, far down in them. I
shall have to leave off abusing them some day.
At the hour of five, Selina, having
spent the afternoon searching for Harold in all his
accustomed haunts, sat down disconsolately to tea with
her dolls, who ungenerously refused to wait beyond
the appointed hour. The wooden tea-things seemed
more chipped than usual; and the dolls themselves
had more of wax and sawdust, and less of human colour
and intelligence about them, than she ever remembered
before. It was then that Harold burst in, very
dusty, his stockings at his heels, and the channels
ploughed by tears still showing on his grimy cheeks;
and Selina was at last permitted to know that he had
been thinking of her ever since his ill-judged exhibition
of temper, and that his sulks had not been the genuine
article, nor had he gone frogging by himself.
It was a very happy hostess who dispensed hospitality
that evening to a glassy-eyed stiff-kneed circle;
and many a dollish gaucherie, that would have been
severely checked on ordinary occasions, was as much
overlooked as if it had been a birthday.
But Harold and I, in our stupid masculine
way, thought all her happiness sprang from possession
of the long-coveted tea-service.