The place where I first saw him was
a tavern wherein, ensconced in the chimney-corner,
and facing a table, he was exclaiming stutteringly,
“Oh, I know the truth about you all! Yes,
I know the truth about you!” while standing
in a semicircle in front of him, and unconsciously
rendering him more and more excited with their sarcastic
interpolations, were some tradesmen of the superior
sort five in number. One of them remarked
indifferently:
“How should you not know
the truth about us, seeing that you do nothing but
slander us?”
Shabby, in fact in rags, Gubin at
that moment reminded me of a homeless dog which, having
strayed into a strange street, has found itself held
up by a band of dogs of superior strength, and, seized
with nervousness, is sitting back on its haunches
and sweeping the dust with its tail; and, with growls,
and occasional barings of its fangs, and sundry barkings,
attempting now to intimidate its adversaries, and now
to conciliate them. Meanwhile, having perceived
the stranger’s helplessness and insignificance,
the native pack is beginning to moderate its attitude,
in the conviction that, though continued maintenance
of dignity is imperative, it is not worthwhile to pick
a quarrel so long as an occasional yelp be vented
in the stranger’s face.
“To whom are you of any use?”
one of the tradesmen at length inquired.
“Not a man of us but may be of use.”
“To whom, then?"...
I had long since grown familiar with
tavern disputes concerning verities, and not infrequently
seen those disputes develop into open brawls; but
never had I permitted myself to be drawn into their
toils, or to be set wandering amid their tangles like
a blind man negotiating a number of hillocks.
Moreover, just before this encounter with Gubin, I
had arrived at a dim surmise that when such differences
were carried to the point of madness and bloodshed.
Really, they constituted an expression of the unmeaning,
hopeless, melancholy life that is lived in the wilder
and more remote districts of Russia of the
life that is lived on swampy banks of dingy rivers,
and in our smaller and more God-forgotten towns.
For it would seem that in such places men have nothing
to look for, nor any knowledge of how to look for anything;
wherefore, they brawl and shout in vain attempts to
dissipate despondency....
I myself was sitting near Gubin, but
on the other side of the table. Yet, this was
not because his outbursts and the tradesmen’s
retorts thereto were a pleasure to listen to, since
to me both the one and the other seemed about as futile
as beating the air.
“To whom are you of use?”
“To himself every man can be useful.”
“But what good can one do oneself?"...
The windows of the tavern were open,
while in the pendent, undulating cloud of blue smoke
that the flames of the lamps emitted, those lamps
looked like so many yellow pitchers floating amid the
waters of a stagnant pond. Out of doors there
was brooding the quiet of an August night, and not
a rustle, not a whisper was there to be heard.
Hence, as numbed with melancholy, I gazed at the inky
heavens and limpid stars I thought to myself:
“Surely, never were the sky
and the stars meant to look down upon a life like
this, a life like this?”
Suddenly someone said with the subdued
assurance of a person reading aloud from a written
document:
“Unless the peasants of Kubarovo
keep a watch upon their timber lands, the sun will
fire them tomorrow, and then the Birkins’ forest
also will catch alight.”
For a moment the dispute died down.
Then, as it were cleaving the silence, a voice said
stutteringly:
“Who cares about the significance of the word
’truth’?”
And the words heavy, jumbled,
and clumsy filled me with despondent reflections.
Then again the voices rose this time in
louder and more venomous accents, and with their din
recalled to me, by some accident, the foolish lines:
The gods did give men water
To wash in, and to drink;
Yet man has made it but a pool
In which his woes to sink.
Presently I moved outside and, seating
myself on the steps of the veranda, fell to contemplating
the dull, blurred windows of the Archpriest’s
house on the other side of the square, and to watching
how black shadows kept flitting to and fro behind
their panes as the faint, lugubrious notes of a guitar
made themselves heard. And a high-pitched, irritable
voice kept repeating at intervals: “Allow
me. Pray, permit me to speak,” and being
answered by a voice which intermittently shot into
the silence, as into a bottomless sack, the words:
“No, do you wait a moment, do you wait a moment.”
Surrounded by the darkness, the houses
looked stunted like gravestones, with a line of black
trees above their roofs that loomed shadowy and cloud-like.
Only in the furthest corner of the expanse was the
light of a solitary street lamp bearing a resemblance
to the disk of a stationary, resplendent dandelion.
Over everything was melancholy.
Far from inviting was the general outlook. So
much was this the case that, had, at that moment, anyone
stolen upon me from behind the bushes and dealt me
a sudden blow on the head, I should merely have sunk
to earth without attempting to see who my assailant
had been.
Often, in those days, was I in this
mood, for it clave to me as faithfully as a dog never
did it wholly leave me.
“It was for men like those
that this fair earth of ours was bestowed upon us!”
I thought to myself.
Suddenly, with a clatter, someone
ran out of the door of the tavern, slid down the steps,
fell headlong at their foot, quickly regained his
equilibrium, and disappeared in the darkness after
exclaiming in a threatening voice:
“Oh, I’ll pay you out! I’ll
skin you, you damned...!”
Whereafter two figures that also appeared
in the doorway said as they stood talking to one another:
“You heard him threaten to fire the place, did
you not?”
“Yes, I did. But why should he want to
fire it?”
“Because he is a dangerous rascal.”
Presently, slinging my wallet upon
my back, I pursued my onward way along a street that
was fenced on either side with a tall palisade.
As I proceeded, long grasses kept catching at my feet
and rustling drily. And so warm was the night
as to render the payment of a lodging fee superfluous;
and the more so since in the neighbourhood of the
cemetery, where an advanced guard of young pines had
pushed forward to the cemetery wall and littered the
sandy ground, with a carpet of red, dry cones, there
were sleeping-places prepared in advance.
Suddenly from the darkness there emerged,
to recoil again, a man’s tall figure.
“Who is that? Who is it?”
asked the hoarse, nervous voice of Gubin in dissipation
of the deathlike stillness.
Which said, he and I fell into step
with one another. As we proceeded he inquired
whence I had come, and why I was still abroad.
Whereafter he extended to me, as to an old acquaintance,
the invitation:
“Will you come and sleep at
my place? My house is near here, and as for work,
I will find you a job tomorrow. In fact, as it
happens, I am needing a man to help me clean out a
well at the Birkins’ place. Will the job
suit you? Very well, then. Always I like
to settle things overnight, as it is at night that
I can best see through people.”
The “house” turned out
to be nothing more than an old one-eyed, hunchbacked
washhouse or shanty which, bulging of wall, stood wedged
against the clayey slope of a ravine as though it would
fain bury itself amid the boughs of the neighbouring
arbutus trees and elders.
Without striking a light, Gubin flung
himself upon some mouldy hay that littered a threshold
as narrow as the threshold of a dog-kennel, and said
to me with an air of authority as he did so:
“I will sleep with my head towards
the door, for the atmosphere here is a trifle confined.”
And, true enough, the place reeked
of elderberries, soap, burnt stuff, and decayed leaves.
I could not conceive why I had come to such a spot.
The twisted branches of the neighbouring
trees hung motionless athwart the sky, and concealed
from view the golden dust of the Milky Way, while
across the Oka an owl kept screeching, and the strange,
arresting remarks of my companion pelted me like showers
of peas.
“Do not be surprised that I
should live in a remote ravine,” he said.
“I, whose hand is against every man, can at least
feel lord of what I survey here.”
Too dark was it for me to see my host’s
face, but my memory recalled his bald cranium, and
the yellow light of the lamps falling upon a nose
as long as a woodpecker’s beak, a pair of grey
and stubbly cheeks, a pair of thin lips covered by
a bristling moustache, a mouth sharp-cut as with a
knife, and full of black, evil-looking stumps, a pair
of pointed, sensitive, mouse-like ears, and a clean-shaven
chin. The last feature in no way consorted with
his visage, or with his whole appearance; but at least
it rendered him worthy of remark, and enabled one
to realise that one had to deal with neither a peasant
nor a soldier nor a tradesman, but with a man peculiar
to himself. Also, his frame was lanky, with long
arms and legs, and pointed knees and elbows.
In fact, so like a piece of string was his body that
to twist it round and round, or even to tie it into
a knot, would, seemingly, have been easy enough.
For awhile I found his speech difficult
to follow; wherefore, silently I gazed at the sky,
where the stars appeared to be playing at follow-my-leader.
“Are you asleep?” at length he inquired.
“No, I am not. Why do you shave your beard?”
“Why do you ask?”
“Because, if you will pardon
me, I think your face would look better bearded.”
With a short laugh he exclaimed:
“Bearded? Ah, sloven! Bearded, indeed!”
To which he added more gravely:
“Both Peter the Great and Nicholas
I were wiser than you, for they ordained that whosoever
should be bearded should have his nose slit, and be
fined a hundred roubles. Did you ever hear of
that?”
“No.”
“And from the same source, from the beard, arose
also the Great Schism.”
His manner of speaking was too rapid
to be articulate, and, in leaving his mouth, his words
caused his lips to bare stumps and gums amid which
they lost their way, became disintegrated, and issued,
as it were, in an incomplete state.
“Everyone,” he continued,
“knows that life is lived more easily with a
beard than without one, since with a beard lies are
more easily told they can be told, and
then hidden in the masses of hair. Hence we ought
to go through life with our faces naked, since such
faces render untruthfulness more difficult, and prevent
their owners from prevaricating without the fact becoming
plain to all.”
“But what about women?”
“What about women? Well,
women can always lie to their husbands successfully,
but not to all the town, to all the world, to folk
in general. Moreover, since a woman’s real
business in life is the same as that of the hen, to
rear young, what can it matter if she does cackle
a few falsehoods, provided that she be neither a priest
nor a mayor nor a tchinovnik, and does not possess
any authority, and cannot establish laws? For
the really important point is that the law itself should
not lie, but ever uphold truth pure and simple.
Long has the prevalent illegality disgusted me.”
The door of the shanty was standing
open, and amid the outer darkness, as in a church,
the trees looked like pillars, and the white stems
of the birches like silver candelabra tipped with
a thousand lights, or dimly-seen choristers with faces
showing pale above sacramental vestments of black.
All my soul was full of a sort of painful restlessness.
It was a feeling as though I should live to rise and
go forth into the darkness, and offer battle to the
terrors of the night; yet ever, as my companion’s
torrential speech caught and held my attention, it
detained me where I was.
“My father was a man of no little
originality and character,” he went on.
“Wherefore, none of the townsfolk liked him.
By the age of twenty he had risen to be an alderman,
yet never to the end could get the better of folk’s
stubbornness and stupidity, even though he made it
his custom to treat all and sundry to food and drink,
and to reason with them. No, not even at the
last did he attain his due. People feared him
because he revolutionised everything, revolutionised
it down to the very roots; the truth being that he
had grasped the one essential fact that law and order
must be driven, like nails, into the people’s
very vitals.”
Mice squeaked under the floor, and
on the further side of the Oka an owl screeched, while
amid the pitch-black heavens I could see a number
of blotches intermittently lightening to an elusive
red and blurring the faint glitter of the stars.
“It was one o’clock in
the morning when my father died,” Gubin continued.
“And upon myself, who was seventeen and had just
finished my course at the municipal school of Riazan,
there devolved, naturally enough, all the enmity that
my father had incurred during his lifetime. ‘He
is just like his sire,’ folk said. Also,
I was alone, absolutely alone, in the world, since
my mother had lost her reason two years before my
father’s death, and passed away in a frenzy.
However, I had an uncle, a retired unter-officier
who was both a sluggard, a tippler, and a hero (a
hero because he had had his eyes shot out at Plevna,
and his left arm injured in a manner which had induced
paralysis, and his breast adorned with the military
cross and a set of medals). And sometimes, this
uncle of mine would rally me on my learning. For
instance, ‘Scholar,’ he would say, ‘what
does “tiversia” mean?’ ’No
such word exists,’ would be my reply, and thereupon
he would seize me by the hair, for he was rather an
awkward person to deal with. Another factor as
concerned making me ashamed of my scholarship was the
ignorance of the townspeople in general, and in the
end I became the common butt, a sort of ‘holy
idiot.’”
So greatly did these recollections
move Gubin that he rose and transferred his position
to the door of the hut, where, a dark blur against
the square of blue, he lit a gurgling pipe, and puffed
thereat until his long, conical nose glowed.
Presently the surging stream of words began again:
“At twenty I married an orphan,
and when she fell ill and died childless I found myself
alone once more, and without an adviser or a friend.
However, still I continued both to live and to look
about me. And in time, I perceived that life
is not lived wholly as it should be.”
“What in life is ’not lived wholly as
it should be’?”
“Everything in life. For
life is mere folly, mere fatuous nonsense. The
truth is that our dogs do not bark always at the right
moment. For instance, when I said to folk, ’How
would it be if we were to open a technical school
for girls?’ They merely laughed and replied,
’Trade workers are hopeless drunkards.
Already have we enough of them. Besides, hitherto
women have contrived to get on without education.’
And when next I conceived a scheme for instituting
a match factory, it befell that the factory was burnt
down during its first year of existence, and I found
myself once more at a loose end. Next a certain
woman got hold of me, and I flitted about her like
a martin around a belfry, and so lost my head as to
live life as though I were not on earth at all for
three years I did not know even what I was doing, and
only when I recovered my senses did I perceive myself
to be a pauper, and my all, every single thing that
I had possessed, to have passed into her white
hands. Yes, at twenty-eight I found myself a beggar.
Yet I have never wholly regretted the fact, for certainly
for a time I lived life as few men ever live it.
‘Take my all take it!’ I used
to say to her. And, truly enough, I should never
have done much good with my father’s fortune,
whereas she well, so it befell. Somehow
I think that in those days my opinions must have been
different from now now that I have lost
everything.... Yet the woman used to say, ’You
have not lost everything,’ and she had
wit enough to fit out a whole townful of people.”
“This woman who was she?”
“The wife of a merchant.
Whenever she unrobed and said, ’Come! What
is this body of mine worth?’ I used to make
reply, ’A price that is beyond compute.’...
So within three years everything that I possessed
vanished like smoke. Sometimes, of course, folk
laughed at and jibed at me; nor did I ever refute
them. But now that I have come to have a better
understanding of life’s affairs, I see that life
is not wholly lived as it should be. For that
matter, too, I do not hold my tongue on the subject,
for that is not my way still left to me
I have a tongue and my soul. The same reason
accounts for the fact that no one likes me, and that
by everyone I am looked upon as a fool.”
“How, in your opinion, ought life to be lived?”
Without answering me at once, Gubin
sucked at his pipe until his nose made a glowing red
blur in the darkness. Then he muttered slowly:
“How life ought to be lived
no one could say exactly. And this though I have
given much thought to the subject, and still am doing
so.”
I found it no difficult matter to
form a mental picture of the desolate existence which
this man must be leading this man whom all
his fellows both derided and shunned. For at
that time I too was bidding fair to fail in life,
and had my heart in the grip of ceaseless despondency.
The truth is that of futile people
Russia is over-full. Many such I myself have
known, and always they have attracted me as strongly
and mysteriously as a magnet. Always they have
struck me more favourably than the provincial-minded
majority who live for food and work alone, and put
away from them all that could conceivably render their
bread-winning difficult, or prevent them from snatching
bread out of the hands of their weaker neighbours.
For most such folk are gloomy and self-contained,
with hearts that have turned to wood, and an outlook
that ever reverts to the past; unless, indeed, they
be folk of spurious good nature, an addition to talkativeness,
and an apparent bonhomie which veils a frigid, grey
interior, and conveys an impression of cruelty and
greed of all that life contains.
Always, in the end, I have detected
in such folk something wintry, something that makes
them seem, as it were, to be spending spring and summer
in expectation solely of the winter season, with its
long nights, and its cold of an austerity which forces
one for ever to be consuming food.
Yet seldom among this distasteful
and wearisome crowd of wintry folk is there to be
encountered a man who has altogether proved a failure.
But if he has done so, he will be found to be a man
whose nature is of a more thoughtful, a more truly
existent, a more clear-sighted cast than that of his
fellows a man who at least can look beyond
the boundaries of the trite and commonplace, and whose
mentality has a greater capacity for attaining spiritual
fulfilment, and is more desirous of doing so, than
the mentality of his compeers. That is to say,
in such a man one can always detect a striving for
space, as a man who, loving light, carries light in
himself.
Unfortunately, all too often is that
light only the fugitive phosphorescence of putrefaction;
wherefore as one contemplates him one soon begins
to realise with bitterness and vexation and disappointment
that he is but a sluggard, but a braggart, but one
who is petty and weak and blinded with conceit and
distorted with envy, but one between whose word and
whose deed there gapes a disparity even wider and deeper
than the disparity which divides the word from the
deed of the man of winter, of the man who, though
he be as tardy as a snail, at least is making some
way in the world, in contradistinction from the failure
who revolves ever in a single spot, like some barren
old maid before the reflection in her looking-glass.
Hence, as I listened to Gubin, there
recurred to me more than one instance of his type.
“Yes, I have succeeded in observing
life throughout,” he muttered drowsily as his
head sank slowly upon his breast.
And sleep overtook myself with similar
suddenness. Apparently that slumber was of a
few minutes’ duration only, yet what aroused
me was Gubin pulling at my leg.
“Get up now,” he said. “It
is time that we were off.”
And as his bluish-grey eyes peered
into my face, somehow I derived from their mournful
expression a sense of intellectuality. Beneath
the hair on his hollow cheeks were reddish veins,
while similar veins, bluish in tint, covered with
a network his temples, and his bare arms had the appearance
of being made of tanned leather.
Dawn had not yet broken when we rose
and proceeded through the slumbering streets beneath
a sky that was of a dull yellow, and amid an atmosphere
that was full of the smell of burning.
“Five days now has the forest
been on fire,” observed Gubin. “Yet
the fools cannot succeed in putting it out.”
Presently the establishment of the
merchants Birkin lay before us, an establishment of
curious aspect, since it constituted, rather, a conglomeration
of appendages to a main building of ground floor and
attics, with four windows facing on to the street,
and a series of underpropping annexes. That series
extended to the wing, and was solid and permanent,
and bade fair to overflow into the courtyard, and
through the entrance-gates, and across the street,
and to the very kitchen-garden and flower-garden themselves.
Also, it seemed to have been stolen piecemeal from
somewhere, and at different periods, and from different
localities, and tacked at haphazard on to the walls
of the parent erection. Moreover, all the windows
of the latter were small, and in their green panes,
as they confronted the world, there was a timid and
suspicious air, while, in particular, the three windows
which faced upon the courtyard had iron bars to them.
Lastly, there were posted, sentinel-like on the entrance-steps,
two water-butts as a precaution against fire.
“What think you of the place?”
Gubin muttered as he peered into the well. “Isn’t
it a barbarous hole? The right thing would be
to pull it down wholesale, and then rebuild it on
larger and less restricted lines. Yet these fools
merely go tacking new additions on to the old.”
For awhile his lips moved as in an
incantation. Then he frowned, glanced shrewdly
at the structures in question, and continued softly:
“I may say in passing that the place is mine.”
“Yours?”
“Yes, mine. At all events, so it used to
be.”
And he pulled a grimace as though
he had got the toothache before adding with an air
of command:
“Come! I will pump out
the water, and you shall carry it to the entrance-steps
and fill the water-butts. Here is a pail, and
here a ladder.”
Whereafter, with a considerable display
of strength, he set about his portion of the task,
whilst I myself took pail in hand and advanced towards
the steps to find that the water-butts were so rotten
that, instead of retaining the water, they let it
leak out into the courtyard. Gubin said with
an oath:
“Fine masters these masters
who grudge one a groat, and squander a rouble!
What if a fire were to break out? Oh, the
blockheads!”
Presently, the proprietors in person
issued into the courtyard the stout, bald
Peter Birkin, a man whose face was flushed even to
the whites of his shifty eyes, and, close behind him,
eke his shadow, Jonah Birkin a person of
sandy, sullen mien, and overhanging brows, and dull,
heavy eyes.
“Good day, dear sir,”
said Peter Birkin thinly, as with a puffy hand he
raised from his head a cloth cap, while Jonah nodded.
And then, with a sidelong glance at myself, asked
in a deep bass voice:
“Who is this young man?”
Large and important like peacocks,
the pair then shuffled across the wet yard, and in
so doing, went to much trouble to avoid soiling their
polished shoes. Next Peter said to his brother:
“Have you noticed that the water-butts
are rotted? Oh, that fine Yakinika! He ought
long ago to have been dismissed.”
“Who is that young man over
there?” Jonah repeated with an air of asperity.
“The son of his father and mother,”
Gubin replied quietly, and without so much as a glance
at the brothers.
“Well, come along,” snuffled
Peter with a drawling of his vowels. “It
is high time that we were moving. It doesn’t
matter who the young man may be.”
And with that they slip-slopped across
to the entrance gates, while Gubin gazed after them
with knitted brows, and as the brothers were disappearing
through the wicket said carelessly:
“The old sheep! They live
solely by the wits of their stepmother, and if it
were not for her, they would long ago have come to
grief. Yes, she is a woman beyond words clever.
Once upon a time there were three brothers Peter,
Alexis, and Jonah; but, unfortunately, Alexis got
killed in a brawl. A fine, tall fellow he
was, whereas these two are a pair of gluttons, like
everyone else in this town. Not for nothing do
three loaves figure on the municipal arms! Now,
to work again! Or shall we take a rest?”
Here there stepped on to the veranda
a tall, well-grown young woman in an open pink bodice
and a blue skirt who, shading blue eyes with her hand,
scanned the courtyard and the steps, and said with
some diffidence:
“Good day, Yakov Vasilitch.”
With a good-humoured glance in response,
and his mouth open, Gubin waved a hand in greeting:
“Good day to you, Nadezhda
Ivanovna,” he replied. “How are you
this morning?”
Somehow this made her blush, and cross
her arms upon her ample bosom, while her kindly, rounded,
eminently Russian face evinced the ghost of a shy
smile. At the same time, it was a face wherein
not a single feature was of a kind to remain fixed
in the memory, a face as vacant as though nature had
forgotten to stamp thereon a single wish. Hence,
even when the woman smiled there seemed to remain a
doubt whether the smile had really materialised.
“How is Natalia Vasilievna?” continued
Gubin.
“Much as usual,” the woman answered softly.
Whereafter hesitantly, and with downcast
eyes, she essayed to cross the courtyard. As
she passed me I caught a whiff of raspberries and
currants.
Disappearing into the grey mist through
a small door with iron staples, she soon reissued
thence with a hencoop, and, seating herself on the
steps of the doorway, and setting the coop on her knees,
took between her two large palms some fluttering,
chirping, downy, golden chicks, and raised them to
her ruddy lips and cheeks with a murmur of:
“Oh my little darlings! Oh my little darlings!”
And in her voice, somehow, there was
a note as of intoxication, of abandonment. Meanwhile
dull, reddish sunbeams were beginning to peer through
the fence, and to warm the long, pointed staples with
which it was fastened together. While in a stream
of water that was dripping from the eaves, and trickling
over the floor of the court, and around the woman’s
feet, a single beam was bathing and quivering as though
it would fain effect an advance to the woman’s
lap and the hencoop, and, with the soft, downy chicks,
enjoy the caresses of the woman’s bare white
arms.
“Ah, little things!” again
she murmured. “Ah, little children of mine!”
Upon that Gubin suddenly desisted
from his task of hauling up the bucket, and, as he
steadied the rope with his arms raised above his head,
said quickly:
“Nadezhda Ivanovna, you ought
indeed to have had some children six at
the least!”
Yet no reply came, nor did the woman even look at
him.
The rays of the sun were now spreading,
smokelike and greyish-yellow, over the silver river.
Above the river’s calm bed a muslin texture of
mist was coiling. Against the nebulous heavens
the blue of the forest was rearing itself amid the
fragrant, pungent fumes from the burning timber.
Yet still asleep amid its sheltering
half-circle of forest was the quiet little town of
Miamlin, while behind it, and encompassing it as with
a pair of dark wings, the forest in question looked
as though it were ruffling its feathers in preparation
for further flight beyond the point where, the peaceful
Oka reached, the trees stood darkening, overshadowing
the water’s clear depths, and looking at themselves
therein.
Yet, though the hour was so early,
everything seemed to have about it an air of sadness,
a mien as though the day lacked promise, as though
its face were veiled and mournful, as though, not yet
come to birth, it nevertheless were feeling weary
in advance.
Seating myself by Gubin on some trampled
straw in the hut ordinarily used by the watchman of
the Birkins’ extensive orchard, I found that,
owing to the orchard being set on a hillside, I could
see over the tops of the apple and pear and fig trees,
where their tops hung bespangled with dew as with
quicksilver, and view the whole town and its multicoloured
churches, yellow, newly-painted prison, and yellow-painted
bank.
And while in the town’s lurid,
four-square buildings I could trace a certain resemblance
to the aces of clubs stamped upon convicts’ backs,
in the grey strips of the streets I could trace a certain
resemblance to a number of rents in an old, ragged,
faded, dusty coat. Indeed, that morning all comparisons
seemed to take on a tinge of melancholy; the reason
being that throughout the previous evening there had
been moaning in my soul a mournful dirge on the future
life.
With nothing, however, were the churches
of the town of which I am speaking exactly comparable,
for many of them had attained a degree of beauty the
contemplation of which caused the town to assume throughout a
different, a more pleasing and seductive, aspect.
Thought I to myself: “Would that men had
fashioned all other buildings in the town as the churches
have been fashioned!”
One of the latter, an old, squat edifice
the blank windows of which were deeply sunken in the
stuccoed walls, was known as the “Prince’s
Church,” for the reason that it enshrined the
remains of a local Prince and his wife, persons of
whom it stood recorded that “they did pass all
their lives in kindly, unchanging love."...
The following night Gubin and I chanced
to see Peter Birkin’s tall, pale, timid young
wife traverse the garden on her way to a tryst in the
washhouse with her lover, the precentor of the Prince’s
Church. And as clad in a simple gown, and barefooted,
and having her ample shoulders swathed in an old,
gold jacket or shawl of some sort, she crossed the
orchard by a path running between two lines of apple
trees; she walked with the unhasting gait of a cat
which is crossing a yard after a shower of rain, and
from time to time, whenever a puddle is encountered,
lifts and shakes fastidiously one of its soft paws.
Probably, in the woman’s case, this came of the
fact that things kept pricking and tickling her soles
as she proceeded. Also, her knees, I could see,
were trembling, and her step had in it a certain hesitancy,
a certain lack of assurance.
Meanwhile, bending over the garden
from the warm night sky, the moon’s kindly visage,
though on the wane, was shining brightly; and when
the woman emerged from the shadow of the trees I could
discern the dark patches of her eyes, her rounded,
half-parted lips, and the thick plait of hair which
lay across her bosom. Also, in the moonlight her
bodice had assumed a bluish tinge, so that she looked
almost phantasmal; and when soundlessly, moving as
though on air, she stepped back into the shadow of
the trees, that shadow seemed to lighten.
All this happened at midnight, or
thereabouts, but neither of us was yet asleep, owing
to the fact that Gubin had been telling me some interesting
stories concerning the town and its families and inhabitants.
However, as soon as he descried the woman looming like
a ghost, he leapt to his feet in comical terror, then
subsided on to the straw again, contracted his body
as though he were in convulsions, and hurriedly made
the sign of the cross.
“Oh Jesus our Lord!” he
gasped. “Tell me what that is, tell me what
that is!”
“Keep quiet, you,” I urged.
Instead, lurching in my direction, he nudged me with
his arm,
“Is it Nadezhda, think you?” he whispered.
“It is.”
“Phew! The scene seems
like a dream. Just in the same way, and in the
very same place, did her mother-in-law, Petrushka’s
stepmother, use to come and walk. Yes, it was
just like this.”
Then, rolling over, face downwards,
he broke into subdued, malicious chuckles; whereafter,
seizing my hand and sawing it up and down, he whispered
amid his exultant pants:
“I expect Petrushka is asleep,
for probably he has taken too much liquor at the Bassanov’s
smotrini. [A festival at which a fiance pays his first
visit to the house of the parents of his betrothed.]
Aye, he will be asleep. And as for Jonah, he
will have gone to Vaska Klochi. So tonight, until
morning, Nadezhda will be able to kick up her heels
to her heart’s content.”
I too had begun to surmise that the
woman was come thither for purposes of her own.
Yet the scene was almost dreamlike in its beauty.
It thrilled me to the soul to watch how the woman’s
blue eyes gazed about her gazed as though
she were ardently, caressingly whispering to all living
creatures, asleep or awake:
“Oh my darlings! Oh my darlings!”
Beside me the uncouth, broken-down Gubin went on in
hoarse accents:
“You must know that she is Petrushka’s
third wife, a woman whom he took to himself from
the family of a merchant of Murom. Yet the town
has it that not only Petrushka, but also Jonah, makes
use of her that she acts as wife to both
brothers, and therefore lacks children. Also has
it been said of her that one Trinity Sunday she was
seen by a party of women to misconduct herself in
this garden with a police sergeant, and then to sit
on his lap and weep. Yet this last I do not wholly
believe, for the sergeant in question is a veteran
scarcely able to put one foot before the other.
Also, Jonah, though a brute, lives in abject fear of
his stepmother.”
Here a worm-eaten apple fell to the
ground, and the woman paused; whereafter, with head
a little raised, she resumed her way with greater
speed.
As for Gubin, he continued, unchecked,
though with a trifle less animosity, rather as though
he were reading aloud a manuscript which he found
wearisome:
“See how a man like Peter Birkin
may pride himself upon his wealth, and receive honour
during his lifetime, yet all the while have the devil
grinning over his shoulder!”
Then he, Gubin, kept silent awhile,
and merely breathed heavily, and twisted his body
about. But suddenly, he resumed in a strange whisper:
“Fifteen years ago no,
surely it was longer ago than that? Madame
Nadkin, Nadezhda’s mother-in-law, made it her
practice to come to this spot to meet her lover.
And a fine gallant he was!”
Somehow, as I watched the woman creeping
along, and looking as though she were intending to
commit a theft, or as though she fancied that at any
moment she might see the plump brothers Birkin issue
from the courtyard into the garden and come shuffling
ponderously over the darkened ground, with ropes and
cudgels grasped in coarse, red hands which knew no
pity; somehow, as I watched her, I felt saddened, and
paid little heed to Gubin’s whispered remarks,
so intently were my eyes fixed upon the granary wall
as, after gliding along it awhile, the woman bent
her head and disappeared through the dark blue of the
washhouse door. As for Gubin, he went to sleep
with a last drowsy remark of:
“Life is all falsity. Husbands,
wives, fathers, children all of them practise
deceit.”
In the east, portions of the sky were
turning to light purple, and other portions to a darker
hue, while from time to time I could see, looming
black against those portions, coils of smoke the density
of which kept being stabbed with fiery spikes of flame,
so that the vague, towering forest looked like a hill
on the top of which a fiery dragon was crawling about,
and writhing, and intermittently raising tremulous,
scarlet wings, and as often relapsing into, becoming
submerged in, the bank of vapour. And, in contemplating
the spectacle, I seemed actually to be able to hear
the cruel, hissing din of combat between red and black,
and to see pale, frightened rabbits scudding from underneath
the roots of trees amid showers of sparks, and panting,
half-suffocated birds fluttering wildly amid the branches
as further and further afield, and more and more triumphantly,
the scarlet dragon unfurled its wings, and consumed
the darkness, and devoured the rain-soaked timber.
Presently from the dark, blurred doorway
in the wall of the washhouse there emerged a dark
figure which went flitting away among the trees, while
after it someone called in a sharp, incisive whisper:
“Do not forget. You must come.”
“Oh, I shall be only too glad!”
“Very well. In the morning
the lame woman shall call upon you. Do you hear?”
And as the woman disappeared from
view the other person sauntered across the garden,
and scaled the fence with a clatter.
That night I could not sleep, but,
until dawn, lay watching the burning forest as gradually
the weary moon declined, and the lamp of Venus, cold
and green as an emerald, came into view over the crosses
on the Prince’s Church. Indeed was the
latter a fitting place for Venus to illumine if really
it had been the case that the Prince and Princess
had “passed their lives in kindly, unchanging
love”!
Gradually, the dew cleared the trees
of the night darkness, and caused the damp, grey foliage
to smile once more with aniseed and red raspberry,
and to sparkle with the gold of their mildew.
Also, there came hovering about us goldfinches with
their little red-hooded crests, and fussy tomtits
in their cravats of yellow, while a nimble, dark,
blue woodpecker scaled the stem of an apple tree.
And everywhere, yellow leaves fluttered to earth,
and, in doing so, so closely resembled birds as to
make it not always easy to distinguish whether a leaf
or a tomtit had glimmered for a moment in the air.
Gubin awoke, sighed, and with his
gnarled knuckles gave his puffy eyes a rub. Then
he raised himself upon all-fours, and, crawling, much
dishevelled with sleep, out of the watchman’s
hut, snuffed the air (a process in which his movements
approximated comically to those of a keen-nosed watch-dog).
Finally he rose to his feet, and, in the act, shook
one of the trees so violently as to cause a bough to
shed its burden of ripe fruit, and disperse the apples
hither and thither over the dry surface of the ground,
or cause them to bury themselves among the long grass.
Three of the juiciest apples he duly recovered, and,
after examination of their exterior, probed with his
teeth, while kicking away from him as many of the
remainder as he could descry.
“Why spoil those apples?” I queried
“Oh, so you are not asleep?”
he countered with a nod of his melon-shaped cranium.
“As a matter of fact, a few apples won’t
be missed, for there are too many of them about.
My own father it was that planted the trees which
have grown them.”
Then, turning upon me a keen, good-humoured
eye, and chuckling, he added:
“What about that Nadezhda?
Ah, she is a clever woman indeed! Yet I have
a surprise in store for her and her lover.”
“Why should you have?”
“Because I desire to benefit
mankind at large” (this was said didactically,
and with a frown). “For, no matter where
I detect evil or underhandedness, it is my duty I
feel it to be my duty to expose that evil,
and to lay it bare. There exist people who need
to be taught a lesson, and to whom I long to cry:
’Sinners that you are, do you lead more righteous
lives!’”
From behind some clouds the sun was
rising with a disk as murky and mournful as the face
of an ailing child. It was as though he were
feeling conscious that he had done amiss in so long
delaying to shed light upon the world, in so long
dallying on his bed of soft clouds amid the smoke
of the forest fire. But gradually the cheering
beams suffused the garden throughout, and evoked from
the ripening fruit an intoxicating wave of scent in
which there could be distinguished also the bracing
breath of autumn.
Simultaneously there rose into the
sky, in the wake of the sun, a dense stratum of cloud
which, blue and snow-white in colour, lay with its
soft hummocks reflected in the calm Oka, and so wrought
therein a secondary firmament as profound and impalpable
as its original.
“Now then, Makar!” was
Gubin’s command, and once more I posted myself
at the bottom of the well. About three sazheni
in depth, and lined with cold, damp mud to above the
level of my middle, the orifice was charged with a
stifling odour both of rotten wood and of something
more intolerable still. Also, whenever I had
filled the pail with mud, and then emptied it into
the bucket and shouted “Right away!” the
bucket would start swinging against my person and
bumping it, as unwillingly it went aloft, and thereafter
discharge upon my head and shoulders clots of filth
and drippings of water meanwhile screening,
with its circular bottom, the glowing sun and now
scarce visible stars. In passing, the spectacle
of those stars’ waning both pained and cheered
me, for it meant that for a companion in the firmament
they now had the sun. Hence it was until my neck
felt almost fractured, and my spine and the nape of
my neck were aching as though clamped in a cast of
plaster of paris, that I kept my eyes turned
aloft. Yes, anything to gain a sight of the stars!
From them I could not remove my vision, for they seemed
to exhibit the heavens in a new guise, and to convey
to me the joyful tidings that in the sky there was
present also the sun.
Yet though, meanwhile, I tried to
ponder on something great, I never failed to find
myself cherishing the absurd, obstinate apprehension
that soon the Birkins would leave their beds, enter
the courtyard, and have Nadezhda betrayed to them
by Gubin.
And throughout there kept descending
to me from above the latter’s inarticulate,
as it were damp-sodden, observations.
“Another rat!” I heard
him exclaim. “To think that those two fellows,
men of money, should neglect for two whole years to
clean out their well! Why, what can the brutes
have been drinking meanwhile? Look out below,
you!”
And once more, with a creaking of
the pulley, the bucket would descend bumping
and thudding against the lining of the well as it did
so, and bespattering afresh my head and shoulders with
its filth. Rightly speaking, the Birkins ought
to have cleared out the well themselves!
“Let us exchange places,” I cried at length.
“What is wrong?” inquired Gubin in response
“Down here it is cold I can’t
stand it any longer.”
“Gee up!” exclaimed Gubin
to the old horse which supplied the leverage power
for the bucket; whereupon I seated myself upon the
edge of the receptacle and went aloft, where everything
was looking so bright and warm as to bear a new and
unwontedly pleasing appearance.
So now it was Gubin’s turn to
stand at the bottom of the well. And soon, in
addition to the odour of decay, and a subdued sound
of splashing, and the rumblings and bumpings of the
iron bucket against its chain, there began to come
up from the damp, black cavity a perfect stream of
curses.
“The infernal skinflints!” I heard my
companion exclaim.
“Hullo, here is something!
A dog or a baby, eh? The damned old barbarians!”
And the bucket ascended with, among
its contents, a sodden and most ancient hat.
With the passage of time Gubin’s temper grew
worse and worse.
“If I should find a baby
here,” next he exclaimed, “I shall report
the matter to the police, and get those blessed old
brothers into trouble.”
Each movement of the leathern-hided,
wall-eyed steed which did our bidding was accompanied
by a swishing of a sandy tail which had for its object
the brushing away of autumn’s harbingers, the
bluebottles. Almost with the tranquil gait of
a religious did the animal accomplish its periodical
journeys from the wall to the entrance gates and back
again; after which it always heaved a profound sigh,
and stood with its bony crest lowered.
Presently, from a corner of the yard
that lay screened behind some rank, pale, withered,
trampled herbage a door screeched. Into the yard
there issued Nadezhda Birkin, carrying a bunch of keys,
and followed by a lady who, elderly and rotund of
figure, had a few dark hairs growing on her full and
rather haughty upper lip. As the two walked towards
the cellar (Nadezhda being clad only in an under-petticoat,
with a chemise half-covering her shoulders, and slippers
thrust on to bare feet), I perceived from the languor
of the younger woman’s gait that she was feeling
weary indeed.
“Why do you look at us like
that?” her senior inquired of me as she drew
level. And as she did so the eyes that peered
at me from above the full and, somehow, displaced-looking
cheeks bid in them a dim, misty, half-blind expression.
“That must be Peter Birkin’s
mother-in-law,” was my unspoken reflection.
At the door of the cellar Nadezhda
handed the keys to her companion, and with a slow
step which set her ample bosom swaying, and increased
the disarray of the bodice on her round, but broad,
shoulders, approached myself, and said quietly:
“Please open the gutter-sluice
and let out the water into the street, or the yard
will soon be flooded. Oh, the smell of it!
What is that thing there? A rat? Oh batinshka,
what a horrible mess!”
Her face had about it a drawn look,
and under her eyes there were a pair of dark patches,
and in their depths the dry glitter of a person who
has spent a night of waking. True, it was a face
still fresh of hue; yet beads of sweat were standing
on the forehead, and her shoulders looked grey and
heavy as grey and heavy as unleavened bread
which the fire has coated with a thin crust, yet failed
to bake throughout.
“Please, also, open the wicket,”
she continued. “And, in case a lame old
beggar-woman should call, come and tell me. I
am the Nadezhda Ivanovna for whom she will inquire.
Do you understand?”
From the well, at this point, there issued the words:
“Who is that speaking?”
“It is the mistress,” I replied.
“What? Nadezhda? With her I have a
bone to pick.”
“What did he say?” the
woman asked tensely as she raised her dark, thinly
pencilled brows, and made as though to go and lean
over the well. Independently of my own volition
I forestalled what Gubin might next have been going
to say by remarking:
“I must tell you that last night he saw you
walking in the garden here.”
“Indeed?” she ejaculated,
and drew herself to her full height. Yet in doing
so she blushed to her shoulders, and, clapping plump
hands to her bosom, and opening dark eyes to their
fullest, said in a hasty and confused whisper as,
again paling and shrinking in stature, she subsided
like a piece of pastry that is turning heavy:
“Good Lord! What did
he see?... If the lame woman should call, you
must not admit her. No, tell her that she will
not be wanted, that I cannot, that I must not But
see here. Here is a rouble for you. Oh,
good Lord!”
By this time even louder and more
angry exclamations had begun to ascend from Gubin.
Yet the only sound to reach my ears was the woman’s
muttered whispering, and as I glanced into her face
I perceived that its hitherto high-coloured and rounded
contours had fallen in, and turned grey, and that
her flushed lips were trembling to such an extent
as almost to prevent the articulation of her words.
Lastly, her eyes were frozen into an expression of
pitiful, doglike terror.
Suddenly she shrugged her shoulders,
straightened her form, put away from her the expression
of terror, and said quietly, but incisively:
“You will not need to say anything about this.
Allow me.”
And with a swaying step she departed a
step so short as almost to convey the impression that
her legs were bound together. Yet while the gait
was the gait of a person full of suppressed fury, it
was also the gait of a person who can scarcely see
an inch in advance.
“Haul away, you!” shouted Gubin.
I hauled him up in a state of cold
and wet; whereafter he fell to stamping around the
coping of the well, cursing, and waving his arms.
“What have you been thinking
of all this time?” he vociferated. “Why,
for ever so long I shouted and shouted to you!”
“I have been telling Nadezhda
that last night you saw her walking in the garden.”
He sprang towards me with a vicious scowl.
“Who gave you leave to do so?” he exclaimed.
“Wait a moment. I said
that it was only in a dream, that you saw her crossing
the garden to the washhouse.”
“Indeed? And why did you do that?”
Somehow, as, barelegged and dripping
with mud, he stood blinking his eyes at me with a
most disagreeable expression, he looked extremely
comical.
“See here,” I remarked,
“you have only to go and tell her husband about
her for me to go and tell him the same story about
your having seen the whole thing in a dream.”
“Why?” cried Gubin, now
almost beside himself. Presently, however, he
recovered sufficient self-possession to grin and ask
in an undertone:
“How much did she give
you?”
I explained to him that my sole reason
for what I had done had been that I pitied the woman,
and feared lest the brothers Birkin should do an injury
to one who at least ought not to be betrayed.
Gubin began by declining to believe me, but eventually,
after the matter had been thought out, said:
“Acceptance of money for doing
what is right is certainly irregular; but at least
is it better than acceptance of money for conniving
at sin. Well, you have spoilt my scheme, young
fellow. Hired only to clean out the well, I would
nevertheless have cleaned out the establishment as
a whole, and taken pleasure in doing so.”
Then once more he relapsed into fury,
and muttered as he scurried round and round the well:
“How dared you poke your
nose into other people’s affairs? Who are
you in this establishment?”
The air was hot and arid, yet still
the sky was as dull as though coated throughout with
the dust of summer, and, as yet, one could gaze at
the sun’s purple, rayless orb without blinking,
and as easily as one could have gazed at the glowing
embers of a wood fire.
Seated on the fence, a number of rooks
were directing intelligent black eyes upon the heaps
of mud which lay around the coping of the well.
And from time to time they fluttered their wings impatiently,
and cawed.
“I got you some work,”
Gubin continued in a grumbling tone, “and put
heart into you with the prospect of employment.
And now you have gone and treated me like ”
At this point I caught the sound of
a horse trotting towards the entrance-gates, and heard
someone shout, as the animal drew level with the house:
“Your timber too has caught alight!”
Instantly, frightened by the shout,
the rooks took to their wings and flew away.
Also, a window sash squeaked, and the courtyard resounded
with sudden bustle the culinary regions
vomiting the elderly lady and the tousled, half-clad
Jonah; and an open window the upper half of the red-headed
Peter.
“Men, harness up as quickly
as possible!” the latter cried, his voice charged
with a plaintive note.
And, indeed, he had hardly spoken
before Gubin led out a fat roan pony, and Jonah pulled
from a shelter a light buggy or britchka. Meanwhile
Nadezhda called from the veranda to Jonah:
“Do you first go in and dress yourself!”
The elderly lady then unfastened the
gates; whereupon a stunted, oldish muzhik in a red
shirt limped into the yard with a foam-flecked steed,
and exclaimed:
“It is caught in two places at
the Savelkin clearing and near the cemetery!”
Immediately the company pressed around
him with groans and ejaculations, and Gubin alone
continued to harness the pony with swift and dexterous
hands saying to me through his teeth as
he did so, and without looking at anyone:
“That is how those wretched
folk always defer things until too late.”
The next person to present herself
at the entrance gates was a beggar-woman. Screwing
up her eyes in a furtive manner, she droned:
“For the sake of Lord Je-e-esus!”
“God will give you alms!
God will give you alms!” was Nadezhda’s
reply as, turning pale, she flung out her arms in
the old woman’s direction. “You see,
a terrible thing has happened our timber
lands have caught fire. You must come again later.”
Upon that Peter’s bulky form
(which had entirely filled the window from which it
had been leaning), disappeared with a jerk, and in
its stead there came into view the figure of a woman.
Said she contemptuously:
“See the visitation with which
God has tried us, you men of faint hearts and indolent
hands!”
The woman’s hair was grey at
the temples, and had resting upon it a silken cap
which so kept changing colour in the sunlight as to
convey to one the impression that her head was bonneted
with steel, while in her face, picturesque but dark
(seemingly blackened with smoke), there gleamed two
pupil-less blue eyes of a kind which I had never before
beheld.
“Fools,” she continued,
“how often have I not pointed out to you the
necessity of cutting a wider space between the timber
and the cemetery?”
From a furrow above the woman’s
small but prominent nose, a pair of heavy brows extended
to temples that were silvered over. As she spoke
there fell a strange silence amid which save for the
pony’s pawing of the mire no sound mingled with
the sarcastic reproaches of the deep, almost masculine
voice.
“That again is the mother-in-law,”
was my inward reflection.
Gubin finished the harnessing then
said to Jonah in the tone of a superior addressing
a servant:
“Go in and dress yourself, you object!”
Nevertheless, the Birkins drove out
of the yard precisely as they were, while the peasant
mounted his belathered steed and followed them at a
trot; and the elderly lady disappeared from the window,
leaving its panes even darker and blacker than they
had previously been. Gubin, slip-slopping through
the puddles with bare feet, said to me with a sharp
glance as he moved to shut the entrance gates:
“I presume that I can now take
in hand the little affair of which you know.”
“Yakov!” at this juncture someone shouted
from the house.
Gubin straightened himself a la militaire.
“Yes, I am coming,” he replied.
Whereafter, padding on bare soles,
he ascended the steps. Nadezhda, standing at
their top, turned away with a frown of repulsion at
his approach, and nodded and beckoned to myself.
“What has Yakov said to you?” she inquired
“He has been reproaching me.”
“Reproaching you for what?”
“For having spoken to you.”
She heaved a sigh.
“Ah, the mischief-maker!” she exclaimed.
“And what is it that he wants?”
As she pouted her displeasure her
round and vacant face looked almost childlike.
“Good Lord!” she added. “What
do such men as he want?”
Meanwhile the heavens were becoming
overspread with dark grey clouds, and presaging a
flood of autumn rain, while from the window near the
steps the voice of Peter’s mother-in-law was
issuing in a steady stream. At first, however,
nothing was distinguishable save a sound like the
humming of a spindle.
“It is my mother that is speaking,”
Nadezhda explained softly. “She’ll
give it him! Yes, she will protect me!”
Yet I scarcely heard Nadezhda’s
words, so greatly was I feeling struck with the quiet
forcefulness, the absolute assurance, of what was being
said within the window.
“Enough, enough!” said
the voice. “Only through lack of occupation
have you joined the company of the righteous.”
Upon this I made a move to approach
closer to the window; whereupon Nadezhda whispered:
“Whither are you going? You must not listen.”
While she was yet speaking I heard come from the window:
“Similarly your revolt against
mankind has come of idleness, of lack of an interest
in life. To you the world has been wearisome,
so, while devising this revolt as a resource, you
have excused it on the ground of service of God and
love of equity, while in reality constituting yourself
the devil’s workman.”
Here Nadezhda plucked at my sleeve,
and tried to pull me away, but I remarked:
“I must learn what Gubin has got to say
in answer.”
This made Nadezhda smile, and then
whisper with a confiding glance at my face:
“You see, I have made a full
confession to her. I went and said to her:
‘Mamenka, I have had a misfortune.’
And her only reply as she stroked my hair was, ‘Ah,
little fool!’ Thus you see that she pities me.
And what makes her care the less that I should stray
in that direction is that she yearns for me to bear
her a child, a grandchild, as an heir to her property.”
Next, Gubin was heard saying within the room:
“Whensoever an offence is done against the law
I...”
At once a stream of impressive words
from the other drowned his utterance:
“An offence is not always an
offence of moment, since sometimes a person outgrows
the law, and finds it too restrictive. No one
person ought to be rated against another. For
whom alone ought we to fear? Only the God in
whose sight all of us have erred!”
And though in the elderly lady’s
voice there was weariness and distaste, the words
were spoken slowly and incisively. Upon this Gubin
tried to murmur something or another, but again his
utterance failed to edge its way into his interlocutor’s
measured periods:
“No great achievement is it,”
she said, “to condemn a fellow creature.
For always it is easy to sit in judgment upon our fellows.
And even if a fellow creature be allowed to pursue
an evil course unchecked, his offence may yet prove
productive of good. Remember how in every case
the Saints reached God. Yet how truly sanctified,
by the time that they did so reach Him, were they?
Let this ever be borne in mind, for we are over-apt
to condemn and punish!”
“In former days, Natalia Vassilievna,
you took away from me my substance, you took my all.
Also, let me recount to you how we fell into disagreement.”
“No; there is no need for that.”
“Thereafter, I ceased to be
able to bear the contemplation of myself; I ceased
to consider myself as of any value.”
“Let the past remain the past.
That which must be is not to be avoided.”
“Through you, I say, I lost my peace of mind.”
Nadezhda nudged me, and whispered with gay malice:
“That is probably true, for
they say that once he was one of her lovers.”
Then she recollected herself and,
clapping her hands to her face, cried through her
fingers:
“Oh good Lord! What have
I said? No, no, you must not believe these tales.
They are only slanders, for she is the best of women.”
“When evil has been done,”
continued the quiet voice within the window, “it
can never be set right by recounting it to others.
He upon whom a burden has been laid should try to
bear it. And, should he fail to bear it, the
fact will mean that the burden has been beyond his
strength.”
“It was through you that I lost
everything. It was you that stripped me bare.”
“But to that which you lost
I added movement. Nothing in life is ever lost;
it merely passes from one hand to another from
the unskilled hand to the experienced so
that even the bone picked of a dog may ultimately
become of value.”
“Yes, a bone that is what I am.”
“Why should you say that? You are still
a man.”
“Yes, a man, but a man useful for what?”
“Useful, even though the use may not yet be
fully apparent.”
To this, after a pause, the speaker added:
“Now, depart in peace, and make
no further attempt against this woman. Nay, do
not even speak ill of her if you can help it, but consider
everything that you saw to have been seen in a dream.”
“Ah!” was Gubin’s
contrite cry. “It shall be as you say.
Yet, though I should hate, I could not bear, to grieve
you, I must confess that the height whereon you stand
is ”
“Is what, Oh friend of mine?”
“Nothing; save that of all souls
in this world you are, without exception, the best.”
“Yakov Petrovitch, in this world
you and I might have ended our lives together in honourable
partnership. And even now, if God be willing,
we might do so.”
“No. Rather must farewell be said.”
All became quiet within the window,
except that after a prolonged silence there came from
the woman a deep sigh, and then a whisper of, “Oh
Lord!”
Treading softly, like a cat, Nadezhda
darted away towards the steps; whereas I, less fortunate,
was caught by the departing Gubin in the very act
of leaving the neighbourhood of the window. Upon
that he inflated his cheeks, ruffled up his sandy
hair, turned red in the face like a man who has been
through a fight, and cried in strange, querulous,
high-pitched accents:
“Hi! What were you doing
just now? Long-legged devil that you are, I have
no further use for you I do not intend to
work with you any more. So you can go.”
At the same moment the dim face, with
its great blue eyes, showed itself at the window,
and the stem voice inquired:
“What does the noise mean?”
“What does it mean? It means that I do
not intend ”
“You must not, if you wish to
create a disturbance, do it anywhere but in the street.
It must not be created here.”
“What is all this?” Nadezhda put in with
a stamp of her foot. “What ”
At this point, the cook rushed out
with a toasting-fork and militantly ranged herself
by Nadezhda’s side, exclaiming:
“See what comes of not having a single muzhik
in the house!”
I now prepared to withdraw, but, in
doing so, glanced once more at the features of the
elderly lady, and saw that the blue pupils were dilated
so as almost to fill the eyes in their entirety, and
to leave only a bluish margin. And strange and
painful were those eyes eyes fixed blindly,
eyes which seemed to have strayed from their orbits
through yielding to emotion and a consequent overstrain while
the apple of the throat had swelled like the crop
of a bird, and the sheen of the silken head-dress
become as the sheen of metal. Involuntarily, I
thought to myself:
“It is a head that must be made of iron.”
By this time Gubin had penitently
subsided, and was exchanging harmless remarks with
the cook, while carefully avoiding my glance.
“Good day to you, madame,” at length
I said as I passed the window.
Not at once did she reply, but when she did so she
said kindly:
“And good day to you, my friend. Yes,
I wish you good day.”
To which she added an inclination
of the head which resembled nothing so much as a hammer
which much percussion upon an anvil has wrought to
a fine polish.