Students of the folk-lore of the United
States of America are no doubt familiar with the quaint
old story of Clarence MacFadden. Clarence MacFadden,
it seems, was ’wishful to dance, but his feet
wasn’t gaited that way. So he sought a
professor and asked him his price, and said he was
willing to pay. The professor’ (the legend
goes on) ’looked down with alarm at his feet
and marked their enormous expanse; and he tacked on
a five to his regular price for teaching MacFadden
to dance.’
I have often been struck by the close
similarity between the case of Clarence and that of
Henry Wallace Mills. One difference alone presents
itself. It would seem to have been mere vanity
and ambition that stimulated the former; whereas the
motive force which drove Henry Mills to defy Nature
and attempt dancing was the purer one of love.
He did it to please his wife. Had he never gone
to Ye Bonnie Briar-Bush Farm, that popular holiday
resort, and there met Minnie Hill, he would doubtless
have continued to spend in peaceful reading the hours
not given over to work at the New York bank at which
he was employed as paying-cashier. For Henry
was a voracious reader. His idea of a pleasant
evening was to get back to his little flat, take off
his coat, put on his slippers, light a pipe, and go
on from the point where he had left off the night
before in his perusal of the BIS-CAL volume of the
Encyclopædia Britannica making notes
as he read in a stout notebook. He read the BIS-CAL
volume because, after many days, he had finished the
A-AND, AND-AUS, and the AUS-BIS. There was something
admirable and yet a little horrible about
Henry’s method of study. He went after
Learning with the cold and dispassionate relentlessness
of a stoat pursuing a rabbit. The ordinary man
who is paying instalments on the Encyclopædia
Britannica is apt to get over-excited and to skip
impatiently to Volume XXVIII (VET-ZYM) to see how it
all comes out in the end. Not so Henry.
His was not a frivolous mind. He intended to
read the Encyclopædia through, and he was not
going to spoil his pleasure by peeping ahead.
It would seem to be an inexorable
law of Nature that no man shall shine at both ends.
If he has a high forehead and a thirst for wisdom,
his fox-trotting (if any) shall be as the staggerings
of the drunken; while, if he is a good dancer, he
is nearly always petrified from the ears upward.
No better examples of this law could have been found
than Henry Mills and his fellow-cashier, Sidney Mercer.
In New York banks paying-cashiers, like bears, tigers,
lions, and other fauna, are always shut up in a cage
in pairs, and are consequently dependent on each other
for entertainment and social intercourse when business
is slack. Henry Mills and Sidney simply could
not find a subject in common. Sidney knew absolutely
nothing of even such elementary things as Abana, Aberration,
Abraham, or Acrogenae; while Henry, on his side, was
scarcely aware that there had been any developments
in the dance since the polka. It was a relief
to Henry when Sidney threw up his job to join the
chorus of a musical comedy, and was succeeded by a
man who, though full of limitations, could at least
converse intelligently on Bowls.
Such, then, was Henry Wallace Mills.
He was in the middle thirties, temperate, studious,
a moderate smoker, and one would have said a
bachelor of the bachelors, armour-plated against Cupid’s
well-meant but obsolete artillery. Sometimes
Sidney Mercer’s successor in the teller’s
cage, a sentimental young man, would broach the topic
of Woman and Marriage. He would ask Henry if
he ever intended to get married. On such occasions
Henry would look at him in a manner which was a blend
of scorn, amusement, and indignation; and would reply
with a single word:
‘Me!’
It was the way he said it that impressed you.
But Henry had yet to experience the
unmanning atmosphere of a lonely summer resort.
He had only just reached the position in the bank where
he was permitted to take his annual vacation in the
summer. Hitherto he had always been released
from his cage during the winter months, and had spent
his ten days of freedom at his flat, with a book in
his hand and his feet on the radiator. But the
summer after Sidney Mercer’s departure they
unleashed him in August.
It was meltingly warm in the city.
Something in Henry cried out for the country.
For a month before the beginning of his vacation he
devoted much of the time that should have been given
to the Encyclopædia Britannica in reading
summer-resort literature. He decided at length
upon Ye Bonnie Briar-Bush Farm because the advertisements
spoke so well of it.
Ye Bonnie Briar-Bush Farm was a rather
battered frame building many miles from anywhere.
Its attractions included a Lovers’ Leap, a Grotto,
golf-links a five-hole course where the
enthusiast found unusual hazards in the shape of a
number of goats tethered at intervals between the
holes and a silvery lake, only portions
of which were used as a dumping-ground for tin cans
and wooden boxes. It was all new and strange
to Henry and caused him an odd exhilaration. Something
of gaiety and reckless abandon began to creep into
his veins. He had a curious feeling that in these
romantic surroundings some adventure ought to happen
to him.
At this juncture Minnie Hill arrived.
She was a small, slim girl, thinner and paler than
she should have been, with large eyes that seemed
to Henry pathetic and stirred his chivalry. He
began to think a good deal about Minnie Hill.
And then one evening he met her on
the shores of the silvery lake. He was standing
there, slapping at things that looked like mosquitoes,
but could not have been, for the advertisements expressly
stated that none were ever found in the neighbourhood
of Ye Bonnie Briar-Bush Farm, when along she came.
She walked slowly, as if she were tired. A strange
thrill, half of pity, half of something else, ran through
Henry. He looked at her. She looked at him.
‘Good evening,’ he said.
They were the first words he had spoken
to her. She never contributed to the dialogue
of the dining-room, and he had been too shy to seek
her out in the open.
She said ‘Good evening,’
too, tying the score. And there was silence for
a moment.
Commiseration overcame Henry’s shyness.
‘You’re looking tired,’ he said.
‘I feel tired.’ She paused.
‘I overdid it in the city.’
‘It?’
‘Dancing.’
‘Oh, dancing. Did you dance much?’
‘Yes; a great deal.’
‘Ah!’
A promising, even a dashing start.
But how to continue? For the first time Henry
regretted the steady determination of his methods with
the Encyclopædia. How pleasant if he
could have been in a position to talk easily of Dancing.
Then memory reminded him that, though he had not yet
got up to Dancing, it was only a few weeks before that
he had been reading of the Ballet.
‘I don’t dance myself,’
he said, ’but I am fond of reading about it.
Did you know that the word “ballet” incorporated
three distinct modern words, “ballet”,
“ball”, and “ballad”, and that
ballet-dancing was originally accompanied by singing?’
It hit her. It had her weak.
She looked at him with awe in her eyes. One might
almost say that she gaped at Henry.
‘I hardly know anything,’ she said.
‘The first descriptive ballet
seen in London, England,’ said Henry, quietly,
’was “The Tavern Bilkers”, which
was played at Drury Lane in in seventeen something.’
‘Was it?’
’And the earliest modern ballet
on record was that given by by someone
to celebrate the marriage of the Duke of Milan in 1489.’
There was no doubt or hesitation about
the date this time. It was grappled to his memory
by hoops of steel owing to the singular coincidence
of it being also his telephone number. He gave
it out with a roll, and the girl’s eyes widened.
‘What an awful lot you know!’
‘Oh, no,’ said Henry, modestly. ‘I
read a great deal.’
‘It must be splendid to know
a lot,’ she said, wistfully. ’I’ve
never had time for reading. I’ve always
wanted to. I think you’re wonderful!’
Henry’s soul was expanding like
a flower and purring like a well-tickled cat.
Never in his life had he been admired by a woman.
The sensation was intoxicating.
Silence fell upon them. They
started to walk back to the farm, warned by the distant
ringing of a bell that supper was about to materialize.
It was not a musical bell, but distance and the magic
of this unusual moment lent it charm. The sun
was setting. It threw a crimson carpet across
the silvery lake. The air was very still.
The creatures, unclassified by science, who might
have been mistaken for mosquitoes had their presence
been possible at Ye Bonnie Briar-Bush Farm, were biting
harder than ever. But Henry heeded them not.
He did not even slap at them. They drank their
fill of his blood and went away to put their friends
on to this good thing; but for Henry they did not exist.
Strange things were happening to him. And, lying
awake that night in bed, he recognized the truth.
He was in love.
After that, for the remainder of his
stay, they were always together. They walked
in the woods, they sat by the silvery lake. He
poured out the treasures of his learning for her,
and she looked at him with reverent eyes, uttering
from time to time a soft ‘Yes’ or a musical
‘Gee!’
In due season Henry went back to New York.
‘You’re dead wrong about
love, Mills,’ said his sentimental fellow-cashier,
shortly after his return. ‘You ought to
get married.’
‘I’m going to,’ replied Henry, briskly.
‘Week tomorrow.’
Which stunned the other so thoroughly
that he gave a customer who entered at that moment
fifteen dollars for a ten-dollar cheque, and had to
do some excited telephoning after the bank had closed.
Henry’s first year as a married
man was the happiest of his life. He had always
heard this period described as the most perilous of
matrimony. He had braced himself for clashings
of tastes, painful adjustments of character, sudden
and unavoidable quarrels. Nothing of the kind
happened. From the very beginning they settled
down in perfect harmony. She merged with his
life as smoothly as one river joins another.
He did not even have to alter his habits. Every
morning he had his breakfast at eight, smoked a cigarette,
and walked to the Underground. At five he left
the bank, and at six he arrived home, for it was his
practice to walk the first two miles of the way, breathing
deeply and regularly. Then dinner. Then the
quiet evening. Sometimes the moving-pictures,
but generally the quiet evening, he reading the Encyclopædia aloud
now Minnie darning his socks, but never
ceasing to listen.
Each day brought the same sense of
grateful amazement that he should be so wonderfully
happy, so extraordinarily peaceful. Everything
was as perfect as it could be. Minnie was looking
a different girl. She had lost her drawn look.
She was filling out.
Sometimes he would suspend his reading
for a moment, and look across at her. At first
he would see only her soft hair, as she bent over her
sewing. Then, wondering at the silence, she would
look up, and he would meet her big eyes. And
then Henry would gurgle with happiness, and demand
of himself, silently:
‘Can you beat it!’
It was the anniversary of their wedding.
They celebrated it in fitting style. They dined
at a crowded and exhilarating Italian restaurant on
a street off Seventh Avenue, where red wine was included
in the bill, and excitable people, probably extremely
clever, sat round at small tables and talked all together
at the top of their voices. After dinner they
saw a musical comedy. And then the
great event of the night they went on to
supper at a glittering restaurant near Times Square.
There was something about supper at
an expensive restaurant which had always appealed
to Henry’s imagination. Earnest devourer
as he was of the solids of literature, he had tasted
from time to time its lighter face those
novels which begin with the hero supping in the midst
of the glittering throng and having his attention
attracted to a distinguished-looking elderly man with
a grey imperial who is entering with a girl so strikingly
beautiful that the revellers turn, as she passes,
to look after her. And then, as he sits and smokes,
a waiter comes up to the hero and, with a soft ‘Pardon,
m’sieu!’ hands him a note.
The atmosphere of Geisenheimer’s
suggested all that sort of thing to Henry. They
had finished supper, and he was smoking a cigar his
second that day. He leaned back in his chair
and surveyed the scene. He felt braced up, adventurous.
He had that feeling, which comes to all quiet men
who like to sit at home and read, that this was the
sort of atmosphere in which he really belonged.
The brightness of it all the dazzling lights,
the music, the hubbub, in which the deep-throated
gurgle of the wine-agent surprised while drinking soup
blended with the shriller note of the chorus-girl
calling to her mate these things got Henry.
He was thirty-six next birthday, but he felt a youngish
twenty-one.
A voice spoke at his side. Henry
looked up, to perceive Sidney Mercer.
The passage of a year, which had turned
Henry into a married man, had turned Sidney Mercer
into something so magnificent that the spectacle for
a moment deprived Henry of speech. Faultless evening
dress clung with loving closeness to Sidney’s
lissom form. Gleaming shoes of perfect patent
leather covered his feet. His light hair was brushed
back into a smooth sleekness on which the electric
lights shone like stars on some beautiful pool.
His practically chinless face beamed amiably over
a spotless collar.
Henry wore blue serge.
‘What are you doing here, Henry,
old top?’ said the vision. ’I didn’t
know you ever came among the bright lights.’
His eyes wandered off to Minnie.
There was admiration in them, for Minnie was looking
her prettiest.
‘Wife,’ said Henry, recovering
speech. And to Minnie: ’Mr Mercer.
Old friend.’
‘So you’re married? Wish you luck.
How’s the bank?’
Henry said the bank was doing as well as could be
expected.
‘You still on the stage?’
Mr Mercer shook his head importantly.
’Got better job. Professional
dancer at this show. Rolling in money. Why
aren’t you dancing?’
The words struck a jarring note.
The lights and the music until that moment had had
a subtle psychological effect on Henry, enabling him
to hypnotize himself into a feeling that it was not
inability to dance that kept him in his seat, but
that he had had so much of that sort of thing that
he really preferred to sit quietly and look on for
a change. Sidney’s question changed all
that. It made him face the truth.
‘I don’t dance.’
’For the love of Mike!
I bet Mrs Mills does. Would you care for a turn,
Mrs Mills?’
‘No, thank you, really.’
But remorse was now at work on Henry.
He perceived that he had been standing in the way
of Minnie’s pleasure. Of course she wanted
to dance. All women did. She was only refusing
for his sake.
‘Nonsense, Min. Go to it.’
Minnie looked doubtful.
’Of course you must dance, Min.
I shall be all right. I’ll sit here and
smoke.’
The next moment Minnie and Sidney
were treading the complicated measure; and simultaneously
Henry ceased to be a youngish twenty-one and was even
conscious of a fleeting doubt as to whether he was
really only thirty-five.
Boil the whole question of old age
down, and what it amounts to is that a man is young
as long as he can dance without getting lumbago, and,
if he cannot dance, he is never young at all.
This was the truth that forced itself upon Henry Wallace
Mills, as he sat watching his wife moving over the
floor in the arms of Sidney Mercer. Even he could
see that Minnie danced well. He thrilled at the
sight of her gracefulness; and for the first time
since his marriage he became introspective. It
had never struck him before how much younger Minnie
was than himself. When she had signed the paper
at the City Hall on the occasion of the purchase of
the marriage licence, she had given her age, he remembered
now, as twenty-six. It had made no impression
on him at the time. Now, however, he perceived
clearly that between twenty-six and thirty-five there
was a gap of nine years; and a chill sensation came
upon him of being old and stodgy. How dull it
must be for poor little Minnie to be cooped up night
after night with such an old fogy? Other men took
their wives out and gave them a good time, dancing
half the night with them. All he could do was
to sit at home and read Minnie dull stuff from the
Encyclopædia. What a life for the poor
child! Suddenly, he felt acutely jealous of the
rubber-jointed Sidney Mercer, a man whom hitherto
he had always heartily despised.
The music stopped. They came
back to the table, Minnie with a pink glow on her
face that made her younger than ever; Sidney, the insufferable
ass, grinning and smirking and pretending to be eighteen.
They looked like a couple of children Henry,
catching sight of himself in a mirror, was surprised
to find that his hair was not white.
Half an hour later, in the cab going
home, Minnie, half asleep, was aroused by a sudden
stiffening of the arm that encircled her waist and
a sudden snort close to her ear.
It was Henry Wallace Mills resolving
that he would learn to dance.
Being of a literary turn of mind and
also economical, Henry’s first step towards
his new ambition was to buy a fifty-cent book entitled
The ABC of Modern Dancing, by ‘Tango’.
It would, he felt not without reason be
simpler and less expensive if he should learn the
steps by the aid of this treatise than by the more
customary method of taking lessons. But quite
early in the proceedings he was faced by complications.
In the first place, it was his intention to keep what
he was doing a secret from Minnie, in order to be
able to give her a pleasant surprise on her birthday,
which would be coming round in a few weeks. In
the second place, The ABC of Modern Dancing
proved on investigation far more complex than its
title suggested.
These two facts were the ruin of the
literary method, for, while it was possible to study
the text and the plates at the bank, the home was the
only place in which he could attempt to put the instructions
into practice. You cannot move the right foot
along dotted line A B and bring the left foot round
curve C D in a paying-cashier’s cage in a bank,
nor, if you are at all sensitive to public opinion,
on the pavement going home. And while he was
trying to do it in the parlour of the flat one night
when he imagined that Minnie was in the kitchen cooking
supper, she came in unexpectedly to ask how he wanted
the steak cooked. He explained that he had had
a sudden touch of cramp, but the incident shook his
nerve.
After this he decided that he must have lessons.
Complications did not cease with this
resolve. Indeed, they became more acute.
It was not that there was any difficulty about finding
an instructor. The papers were full of their
advertisements. He selected a Mme Gavarni because
she lived in a convenient spot. Her house was
in a side street, with a station within easy reach.
The real problem was when to find time for the lessons.
His life was run on such a regular schedule that he
could hardly alter so important a moment in it as the
hour of his arrival home without exciting comment.
Only deceit could provide a solution.
‘Min, dear,’ he said at breakfast.
‘Yes, Henry?’
Henry turned mauve. He had never lied to her
before.
‘I’m not getting enough exercise.’
‘Why you look so well.’
’I get a kind of heavy feeling
sometimes. I think I’ll put on another
mile or so to my walk on my way home. So so
I’ll be back a little later in future.’
‘Very well, dear.’
It made him feel like a particularly
low type of criminal, but, by abandoning his walk,
he was now in a position to devote an hour a day to
the lessons; and Mme Gavarni had said that that would
be ample.
‘Sure, Bill,’ she had
said. She was a breezy old lady with a military
moustache and an unconventional manner with her clientele.
’You come to me an hour a day, and, if you haven’t
two left feet, we’ll make you the pet of society
in a month.’
‘Is that so?’
’It sure is. I never had
a failure yet with a pupe, except one. And
that wasn’t my fault.’
‘Had he two left feet?’
’Hadn’t any feet at all.
Fell off of a roof after the second lesson, and had
to have ’em cut off him. At that, I could
have learned him to tango with wooden legs, only he
got kind of discouraged. Well, see you Monday,
Bill. Be good.’
And the kindly old soul, retrieving
her chewing gum from the panel of the door where she
had placed it to facilitate conversation, dismissed
him.
And now began what, in later years,
Henry unhesitatingly considered the most miserable
period of his existence. There may be times when
a man who is past his first youth feels more unhappy
and ridiculous than when he is taking a course of
lessons in the modern dance, but it is not easy to
think of them. Physically, his new experience
caused Henry acute pain. Muscles whose existence
he had never suspected came into being for apparently the
sole purpose of aching. Mentally he suffered
even more.
This was partly due to the peculiar
method of instruction in vogue at Mme Gavarni’s,
and partly to the fact that, when it came to the actual
lessons, a sudden niece was produced from a back room
to give them. She was a blonde young lady with
laughing blue eyes, and Henry never clasped her trim
waist without feeling a black-hearted traitor to his
absent Minnie. Conscience racked him. Add
to this the sensation of being a strange, jointless
creature with abnormally large hands and feet, and
the fact that it was Mme Gavarni’s custom to
stand in a corner of the room during the hour of tuition,
chewing gum and making comments, and it is not surprising
that Henry became wan and thin.
Mme Gavarni had the trying habit of
endeavouring to stimulate Henry by frequently comparing
his performance and progress with that of a cripple
whom she claimed to have taught at some previous time.
She and the niece would have spirited
arguments in his presence as to whether or not the
cripple had one-stepped better after his third lesson
than Henry after his fifth. The niece said no.
As well, perhaps, but not better. Mme Gavarni
said that the niece was forgetting the way the cripple
had slid his feet. The niece said yes, that was
so, maybe she was. Henry said nothing. He
merely perspired.
He made progress slowly. This
could not be blamed upon his instructress, however.
She did all that one woman could to speed him up.
Sometimes she would even pursue him into the street
in order to show him on the side-walk a means of doing
away with some of his numerous errors of technique,
the elimination of which would help to make him definitely
the cripple’s superior. The misery of embracing
her indoors was as nothing to the misery of embracing
her on the sidewalk.
Nevertheless, having paid for his
course of lessons in advance, and being a determined
man, he did make progress. One day, to his surprise,
he found his feet going through the motions without
any definite exercise of will-power on his part almost
as if they were endowed with an intelligence of their
own. It was the turning-point. It filled
him with a singular pride such as he had not felt
since his first rise of salary at the bank.
Mme Gavarni was moved to dignified praise.
‘Some speed, kid!’ she observed.
‘Some speed!’
Henry blushed modestly. It was the accolade.
Every day, as his skill at the dance
became more manifest, Henry found occasion to bless
the moment when he had decided to take lessons.
He shuddered sometimes at the narrowness of his escape
from disaster. Every day now it became more apparent
to him, as he watched Minnie, that she was chafing
at the monotony of her life. That fatal supper
had wrecked the peace of their little home. Or
perhaps it had merely precipitated the wreck.
Sooner or later, he told himself, she was bound to
have wearied of the dullness of her lot. At any
rate, dating from shortly after that disturbing night,
a lack of ease and spontaneity seemed to creep into
their relations. A blight settled on the home.
Little by little Minnie and he were
growing almost formal towards each other. She
had lost her taste for being read to in the evenings
and had developed a habit of pleading a headache and
going early to bed. Sometimes, catching her eye
when she was not expecting it, he surprised an enigmatic
look in it. It was a look, however, which he was
able to read. It meant that she was bored.
It might have been expected that this
state of affairs would have distressed Henry.
It gave him, on the contrary, a pleasurable thrill.
It made him feel that it had been worth it, going through
the torments of learning to dance. The more bored
she was now the greater her delight when he revealed
himself dramatically. If she had been contented
with the life which he could offer her as a non-dancer,
what was the sense of losing weight and money in order
to learn the steps? He enjoyed the silent, uneasy
evenings which had supplanted those cheery ones of
the first year of their marriage. The more uncomfortable
they were now, the more they would appreciate their
happiness later on. Henry belonged to the large
circle of human beings who consider that there is
acuter pleasure in being suddenly cured of toothache
than in never having toothache at all.
He merely chuckled inwardly, therefore,
when, on the morning of her birthday, having presented
her with a purse which he knew she had long coveted,
he found himself thanked in a perfunctory and mechanical
way.
‘I’m glad you like it,’ he said.
Minnie looked at the purse without enthusiasm.
‘It’s just what I wanted,’ she said,
listlessly.
’Well, I must be going.
I’ll get the tickets for the theatre while I’m
in town.’
Minnie hesitated for a moment.
‘I don’t believe I want to go to the theatre
much tonight, Henry.’
’Nonsense. We must have
a party on your birthday. We’ll go to the
theatre and then we’ll have supper at Geisenheimer’s
again. I may be working after hours at the bank
today, so I guess I won’t come home. I’ll
meet you at that Italian place at six.’
‘Very well. You’ll miss your walk,
then?’
‘Yes. It doesn’t matter for once.’
‘No. You’re still going on with your
walks, then?’
‘Oh, yes, yes.’
‘Three miles every day?’
‘Never miss it. It keeps me well.’
‘Yes.’
‘Good-bye, darling.’
‘Good-bye.’
Yes, there was a distinct chill in
the atmosphere. Thank goodness, thought Henry,
as he walked to the station, it would be different
tomorrow morning. He had rather the feeling of
a young knight who has done perilous deeds in secret
for his lady, and is about at last to receive credit
for them.
Geisenheimer’s was as brilliant
and noisy as it had been before when Henry reached
it that night, escorting a reluctant Minnie. After
a silent dinner and a theatrical performance during
which neither had exchanged more than a word between
the acts, she had wished to abandon the idea of supper
and go home. But a squad of police could not have
kept Henry from Geisenheimer’s. His hour
had come. He had thought of this moment for weeks,
and he visualized every detail of his big scene.
At first they would sit at their table in silent discomfort.
Then Sidney Mercer would come up, as before, to ask
Minnie to dance. And then then Henry
would rise and, abandoning all concealment, exclaim
grandly: ‘No! I am going to dance with
my wife!’ Stunned amazement of Minnie, followed
by wild joy. Utter rout and discomfiture of that
pin-head, Mercer. And then, when they returned
to their table, he breathing easily and regularly
as a trained dancer in perfect condition should, she
tottering a little with the sudden rapture of it all,
they would sit with their heads close together and
start a new life. That was the scenario which
Henry had drafted.
It worked out up to a certain
point as smoothly as ever it had done in
his dreams. The only hitch which he had feared to
wit, the non-appearance of Sidney Mercer, did not
occur. It would spoil the scene a little, he
had felt, if Sidney Mercer did not present himself
to play the rôle of foil; but he need have had no fears
on this point. Sidney had the gift, not uncommon
in the chinless, smooth-baked type of man, of being
able to see a pretty girl come into the restaurant
even when his back was towards the door. They
had hardly seated themselves when he was beside their
table bleating greetings.
‘Why, Henry! Always here!’
‘Wife’s birthday.’
’Many happy returns of the day,
Mrs Mills. We’ve just time for one turn
before the waiter comes with your order. Come
along.’
The band was staggering into a fresh
tune, a tune that Henry knew well. Many a time
had Mme Gavarni hammered it out of an aged and unwilling
piano in order that he might dance with her blue-eyed
niece. He rose.
‘No!’ he exclaimed grandly.
‘I am going to dance with my wife!’
He had not under-estimated the sensation
which he had looked forward to causing. Minnie
looked at him with round eyes. Sidney Mercer was
obviously startled.
‘I thought you couldn’t dance.’
‘You never can tell,’
said Henry, lightly. ’It looks easy enough.
Anyway, I’ll try.’
‘Henry!’ cried Minnie, as he clasped her.
He had supposed that she would say
something like that, but hardly in that kind of voice.
There is a way of saying ‘Henry!’ which
conveys surprised admiration and remorseful devotion;
but she had not said it in that way. There had
been a note of horror in her voice. Henry’s
was a simple mind, and the obvious solution, that
Minnie thought that he had drunk too much red wine
at the Italian restaurant, did not occur to him.
He was, indeed, at the moment too
busy to analyse vocal inflections. They were
on the floor now, and it was beginning to creep upon
him like a chill wind that the scenario which he had
mapped out was subject to unforeseen alterations.
At first all had been well. They
had been almost alone on the floor, and he had begun
moving his feet along dotted line A B with the smooth
vim which had characterized the last few of his course
of lessons. And then, as if by magic, he was
in the midst of a crowd a mad, jigging
crowd that seemed to have no sense of direction, no
ability whatever to keep out of his way. For
a moment the tuition of weeks stood by him. Then,
a shock, a stifled cry from Minnie, and the first collision
had occurred. And with that all the knowledge
which he had so painfully acquired passed from Henry’s
mind, leaving it an agitated blank. This was
a situation for which his slidings round an empty room
had not prepared him. Stage-fright at its worst
came upon him. Somebody charged him in the back
and asked querulously where he thought he was going.
As he turned with a half-formed notion of apologizing,
somebody else rammed him from the other side.
He had a momentary feeling as if he were going down
the Niagara Rapids in a barrel, and then he was lying
on the floor with Minnie on top of him. Somebody
tripped over his head.
He sat up. Somebody helped him
to his feet. He was aware of Sidney Mercer at
his side.
‘Do it again,’ said Sidney,
all grin and sleek immaculateness. ’It went
down big, but lots of them didn’t see it.’
The place was full of demon laughter.
‘Min!’ said Henry.
They were in the parlour of their
little flat. Her back was towards him, and he
could not see her face. She did not answer.
She preserved the silence which she had maintained
since they had left the restaurant. Not once
during the journey home had she spoken.
The clock on the mantelpiece ticked
on. Outside an Elevated train rumbled by.
Voices came from the street.
‘Min, I’m sorry.’
Silence.
‘I thought I could do it.
Oh, Lord!’ Misery was in every note of Henry’s
voice. ’I’ve been taking lessons every
day since that night we went to that place first.
It’s no good I guess it’s like
the old woman said. I’ve got two left feet,
and it’s no use my ever trying to do it.
I kept it secret from you, what I was doing. I
wanted it to be a wonderful surprise for you on your
birthday. I knew how sick and tired you were
getting of being married to a man who never took you
out, because he couldn’t dance. I thought
it was up to me to learn, and give you a good time,
like other men’s wives. I ’
‘Henry!’
She had turned, and with a dull amazement
he saw that her whole face had altered. Her eyes
were shining with a radiant happiness.
’Henry! Was that
why you went to that house to take dancing
lessons?’
He stared at her without speaking.
She came to him, laughing.
‘So that was why you pretended
you were still doing your walks?’
‘You knew!’
’I saw you come out of that
house. I was just going to the station at the
end of the street, and I saw you. There was a
girl with you, a girl with yellow hair. You hugged
her!’
Henry licked his dry lips.
‘Min,’ he said huskily.
’You won’t believe it, but she was trying
to teach me the Jelly Roll.’
She held him by the lapels of his coat.
’Of course I believe it.
I understand it all now. I thought at the time
that you were just saying good-bye to her! Oh,
Henry, why ever didn’t you tell me what you
were doing? Oh, yes, I know you wanted it to be
a surprise for me on my birthday, but you must have
seen there was something wrong. You must have
seen that I thought something. Surely you noticed
how I’ve been these last weeks?’
‘I thought it was just that you were finding
it dull.’
‘Dull! Here, with you!’
’It was after you danced that
night with Sidney Mercer. I thought the whole
thing out. You’re so much younger than I,
Min. It didn’t seem right for you to have
to spend your life being read to by a fellow like
me.’
‘But I loved it!’
‘You had to dance. Every girl has to.
Women can’t do without it.’
’This one can. Henry, listen!
You remember how ill and worn out I was when you met
me first at that farm? Do you know why it was?
It was because I had been slaving away for years at
one of those places where you go in and pay five cents
to dance with the lady instructresses. I was
a lady instructress. Henry! Just think what
I went through! Every day having to drag a million
heavy men with large feet round a big room. I
tell you, you are a professional compared with some
of them! They trod on my feet and leaned their
two hundred pounds on me and nearly killed me.
Now perhaps you can understand why I’m not crazy
about dancing! Believe me, Henry, the kindest
thing you can do to me is to tell me I must never
dance again.’
‘You you ’
he gulped. ’Do you really mean that you
can can stand the sort of life we’re
living here? You really don’t find it dull?’
‘Dull!’
She ran to the bookshelf, and came back with a large
volume.
’Read to me, Henry, dear.
Read me something now. It seems ages and ages
since you used to. Read me something out of the
Encyclopædia!’
Henry was looking at the book in his
hand. In the midst of a joy that almost overwhelmed
him, his orderly mind was conscious of something wrong.
‘But this is the MED-MUM volume, darling.’
‘Is it? Well, that’ll be all right.
Read me all about “Mum".’
‘But we’re only in the
CAL-CHA ’ He wavered. ‘Oh,
well I’ he went on, recklessly.
‘I don’t care. Do you?’
‘No. Sit down here, dear, and I’ll
sit on the floor.’
Henry cleared his throat.
’"Milicz, or Militsch ,
Bohemian divine, was the most influential among those
preachers and writers in Moravia and Bohemia who,
during the fourteenth century, in a certain sense paved
the way for the reforming activity of Huss."’
He looked down. Minnie’s
soft hair was resting against his knee. He put
out a hand and stroked it. She turned and looked
up, and he met her big eyes.
‘Can you beat it?’ said Henry, silently,
to himself.