A GLOOMY GOOD-BY
At that point my importance ceased.
Apparently seeing that the game was up, Mr. Camp later
in the morning asked Mr. Cullen to give him an interview,
and when he was allowed to pass the sentry he came
to the steps and suggested,
“Perhaps we can arrange a compromise
between the Missouri Western and the Great Southern?”
“We can try,” Mr. Cullen
assented. “Come into my car.”
He made way for Mr. Camp, and was about to follow
him, when Madge took hold of her father’s arm,
and, making him stoop, whispered something to him.
“What kind of a place?” asked Mr. Cullen,
laughing.
“A good one,” his daughter replied.
I thought I understood what was meant.
She didn’t want to rest under an obligation,
and so I was to be paid up for what I had done by
promotion. It made me grit my teeth, and if I
hadn’t taught myself not to swear, because of
my position, I could have given Sheriff Gunton points
on cursing. I wanted to speak up right there
and tell Miss Cullen what I thought of her.
Of the interview which took place
inside 218, I can speak only at second-hand, and the
world knows about as well as I how the contest was
compromised by the K. & A. being turned over to the
Missouri Western, the territory in Southern California
being divided between the California Central and the
Great Southern, and a traffic arrangement agreed upon
that satisfied the G. S. That afternoon a Missouri
Western board for the K. & A. was elected without
opposition, and they in turn elected Mr. Cullen president
of the K. & A.; so when my report of the holding-up
went in, he had the pleasure of reading it. I
closed it with a request for instructions, but I never
received any, and that ended the matter. I turned
over the letters to the special agent at Flagstaff,
and I suppose his report is slumbering in some pigeon-hole
in Washington, for I should have known of any attempt
to bring the culprits to punishment. Mr. Cullen
had taken a big risk, but came out of it with a great
lot of money, for the Missouri Western bought all
his holdings in the K. & A. and C. C. But the scare
must have taught him a lesson, for ever since then
he’s been conservative, and talks about the foolishness
of investors who try to get more than five per cent,
or who think of anything but good railroad bonds.
As for myself, a month after these
occurrences I was appointed superintendent of the
Missouri Western, which by this deal had become one
of the largest railroad systems in the world.
It was a big step up for so young a man, and was of
course pure favoritism, due to Mr. Cullen’s
influence. I didn’t stay in the position
long, for within two years I was offered the presidency
of the Chicago & St. Paul, and I think that was won
on merit. Whether or not, I hold the position
still, and have made my road earn and pay dividends
right through the panic.
All this is getting away ahead of
events, however. The election delayed us so that
we couldn’t couple on to N that afternoon,
and consequently we had to lie that night at Ash Forks.
I made the officers my excuse for keeping away from
the Cullens, as I wished to avoid Madge. I did
my best to be good company to the bluecoats, and had
a first-class dinner for them on my car, but I was
in a pretty glum mood, which even champagne couldn’t
modify. Though all necessity of a guard ceased
with the compromise, the cavalry remained till the
next morning, and, after giving them a good breakfast,
about six o’clock we shook hands, the bugle
sounded, and off they rode. For the first time
I understood how a fellow disappointed in love comes
to enlist.
When I turned about to go into my
car, I found Madge standing on the platform of 218
waving a handkerchief. I paid no attention to
her, and started up my steps.
“Mr. Gordon,” she said, and
when I looked at her I saw that she was flushing, “what
is the matter?”
I suppose most fellows would have
found some excuse, but for the life of me I couldn’t.
All I was able to say was,
“I would rather not say, Miss Cullen.”
“How unfair you are!”
she cried. “You without the slightest
reason you suddenly go out of your way to ill-treat insult
me, and yet will not tell me the cause.”
That made me angry. “Cause?”
I cried. “As if you didn’t know of
a cause! What you don’t know is that I
overheard your conversation with Lord Ralles night
before last.”
“My conversation with Lord Ralles?”
exclaimed Madge, in a bewildered way.
“Yes,” I said bitterly,
“keep up the acting. The practice is good,
even if it deceives no one.”
“I don’t understand a
word you are saying,” she retorted, getting
angry in turn. “You speak as if I had done
wrong, as if I don’t know
what; and I have a right to know to what you allude.”
“I don’t see how I can
be any clearer,” I muttered. “I was
under the station platform, hiding from the cowboys,
while you and Lord Ralles were walking. I didn’t
want to be a listener, but I heard a good deal of
what you said.”
“But I didn’t walk with
Lord Ralles,” she cried. “The only
person I walked with was Captain Ackland.”
That took me very much aback, for
I had never questioned in my mind that it wasn’t
Lord Ralles. Yet the moment she spoke, I realized
how much alike the two brothers’ voices were,
and how easily the blurring of distance and planking
might have misled me. For a moment I was speechless.
Then I replied coldly,
“It makes no difference with
whom you were. What you said was the essential
part.”
“But how could you for an instant
suppose that I could say what I did to Lord Ralles?”
she demanded.
“I naturally thought he would
be the one to whom you would appeal concerning my
‘insulting’ conduct.”
Madge looked at me for a moment as
if transfixed. Then she laughed, and cried,
“Oh, you idiot!”
While I still looked at her in equal
amazement, she went on, “I beg your pardon,
but you are so ridiculous that I had to say it.
Why, I wasn’t talking about you, but about Lord
Ralles.”
“Lord Ralles!” I cried.
“Yes.”
“I don’t understand,” I exclaimed.
“Why, Lord Ralles has been has
been oh, he’s threatened that if
I wouldn’t that ”
“You mean he ?”
I began, and then stopped, for I couldn’t believe
my ears.
“Oh,” she burst out, “of
course you couldn’t understand, and you probably
despise me already, but if you knew how I scorn myself,
Mr. Gordon, and what I have endured from that man,
you would only pity me.”
Light broke on me suddenly. “Do
you mean, Miss Cullen,” I cried hotly, “that
he’s been cad enough to force his attentions
upon you by threats?”
“Yes. First he made me
endure him because he was going to help us, and from
the moment the robbery was done, he has been threatening
to tell. Oh, how I have suffered!”
Then I said a very silly thing.
“Miss Cullen,” I groaned, “I’d
give anything if I were only your brother.”
For the moment I really meant it.
“I haven’t dared to tell
any of them,” she explained, “because I
knew they would resent it and make Lord Ralles angry,
and then he would tell, and so ruin papa. It
seemed such a little thing to bear for his sake, but,
oh, it’s been I suppose you despise
me!”
“I never dreamed of despising
you,” I said. “I only thought, of
course seeing what I did and that
you were fond No that is I
mean well The beast!” I
couldn’t help exclaiming.
“Oh,” said Madge, blushing,
and stammering breathlessly, “you mustn’t
think there was really you happened
to usually I managed to keep with papa
or my brothers, or else run away, as I did when he
interrupted my letter-writing, when you
thought we had but it was nothing of the I
kept away just but the night of the robbery
I forgot, and on the trail his mule blocked the path.
He never there really wasn’t you
saved me the only times he he that
he was really rude; and I am so grateful for it, Mr.
Gordon.”
I wasn’t in a mood to enjoy
even Miss Cullen’s gratitude. Without stopping
for words, I dashed into 218, and, going straight to
Albert Cullen, I shook him out of a sound sleep, and
before he could well understand me I was alternately
swearing at him and raging at Lord Ralles. Finally
he got the truth through his head, and it was nuts
to me, even in my rage, to see how his English drawl
disappeared, and how quick he could be when he really
became excited.
I left him hurrying into his clothes,
and went to my car, for I didn’t dare to see
the exodus of Lord Ralles, through fear that I couldn’t
behave myself. Albert came into 97 in a few moments
to say that the Englishmen were going to the hotel
as soon as dressed, the captain having elected to
stay by his brother.
“I wouldn’t have believed
it of Ralles. I feel jolly cut up, you know,”
he drawled.
I had been so enraged over Lord Ralles
that I hadn’t stopped to reckon in what position
I stood myself towards Miss Cullen, but I didn’t
have to do much thinking to know that I had behaved
about as badly as was possible for me. And the
worst of it was that she could not know that right
through the whole I had never quite been able to think
badly of her. I went out on the platform of the
station, and was lucky enough to find her there alone.
“Miss Cullen,” I said,
“I’ve been ungentlemanly and suspicious,
and I’m about as ashamed of myself as a man
can be and not jump into the Grand Canyon. I’ve
not come to you to ask your forgiveness, for I can’t
forgive myself, much less expect it of you. But
I want you to know how I feel, and if there’s
any reparation, apology, anything, that you’d
like, I’ll ”
Madge interrupted my speech there
by holding out her hand.
“You don’t suppose,”
she said, “that, after all you have done for
us, I could be angry over what was merely a mistake?”
That’s what I call a trump of
a girl, worth loving for a lifetime.
Well, we coupled on to N that
morning and started East, this time Mr. Cullen’s
car being the “ender.” All on 218
were wildly jubilant, as was natural, but I kept growing
bluer and bluer. I took a farewell dinner on
their car the night we were due in Albuquerque, and
afterwards Miss Cullen and I went out and sat on the
back platform.
“I’ve had enough adventures
to talk about for a year,” Madge said, as we
chatted the whole thing over, “and you can no
longer brag that the K. & A. has never had a robbery,
even if you didn’t lose anything.”
“I have lost something,” I sighed sadly.
Madge looked at me quickly, started
to speak, hesitated, and then said, “Oh, Mr.
Gordon, if you only could know how badly I have felt
about that, and how I appreciate the sacrifice.”
I had only meant that I had lost my
heart, and, for that matter, probably my head, for
it would have been ungenerous even to hint to Miss
Cullen that I had made any sacrifice of conscience
for her sake, and I would as soon have asked her to
pay for it in money as have told her.
“You mustn’t think ”
I began.
“I have felt,” she continued,
“that your wish to serve us made you do something
you never would have otherwise done, for Well,
you any one can see how truthful and honest and
it has made me feel so badly that we Oh,
Mr. Gordon, no one has a right to do wrong in this
world, for it brings such sadness and danger to innocent And
you have been so generous ”
I couldn’t let this go on.
“What I did,” I told her, “was to
fight fire with fire, and no one is responsible for
it but myself.”
“I should like to think that,
but I can’t,” she said. “I know
we all tried to do something dishonest, and while
you didn’t do any real wrong, yet I don’t
think you would have acted as you did except for our
sake. And I’m afraid you may some day regret ”
“I sha’n’t,”
I cried; “and, so far from meaning that I had
lost my self-respect, I was alluding to quite another
thing.”
“Time?” she asked.
“No.”
“What?”
“Something else you have stolen.”
“I haven’t,” she denied.
“You have,” I affirmed.
“You mean the novel?”
she asked; “because I sent it in to 97 to-night.”
“I don’t mean the novel.”
“I can’t think of anything
more but those pieces of petrified wood, and those
you gave me,” she said demurely. “I
am sure that whatever else I have of yours you have
given me without even my asking, and if you want it
back you’ve only got to say so.”
“I suppose that would be my very best course,”
I groaned.
“I hate people who force a present
on one,” she continued, “and then, just
as one begins to like it, want it back.”
Before I could speak, she asked hurriedly,
“How often do you come to Chicago?”
I took that to be a sort of command
that I was to wait, and though longing to have it
settled then and there, I braked myself up and answered
her question. Now I see what a duffer I was Madge
told me afterwards that she asked only because she
was so frightened and confused that she felt she must
stop my speaking for a moment.
I did my best till I heard the whistle
the locomotive gives as it runs into yard limits,
and then rose. “Good-by, Miss Cullen,”
I said, properly enough, though no death-bed farewell
was ever more gloomily spoken; and she responded,
“Good-by, Mr. Gordon,” with equal propriety.
I held her hand, hating to let her
go, and the first thing I knew, I blurted out, “I
wish I had the brass of Lord Ralles!”
“I don’t,” she laughed,
“because, if you had, I shouldn’t be willing
to let you ”
And what she was going to say, and
why she didn’t say it, is the concern of no
one but Mr. and Mrs. Richard Gordon.