BARRACK-ROOM BALLADS: THE JACKET
Through the Plagues of Egyp’
we was chasin’ Arabi,
Gettin’
down an’ shovin’ in the sun;
An’ you might ‘ave
called us dirty, an’ you might ha’ called
us dry,
An’ you
might ’ave ‘eard us talkin’
at the gun.
But the Captain ’ad
‘is jacket, an’ the jacket it was new
(’Orse-Gunners,
listen to my song!)
An’ the wettin’
of the jacket is the proper thing to do,
Nor we didn’t
keep ’im waiting very long!
One day they give us orders
for to shell a sand redoubt,
Loadin’
down the axle-arms with case;
But the Captain knew ‘is
dooty, an’ he took the crackers out,
An’ he put
some proper liquor in its place.
An’ the Captain saw
the shrapnel (which is six-an’-thirty clear).
(’Orse-Gunners,
listen to my song!)
“Will you draw the weight,”
sez ’e, “or will you draw the beer?”
An’ we didn’t
keep ‘im waitin’ very long.
For
the Captain, etc.
Then we trotted gentle, not
to break the bloomin’ glass,
Though the Arabites
’ad all their ranges marked;
But we dursn’t ’ardly
gallop, for the most was bottled Bass,
An’ we’d
dreamed of it since we was disembarked.
So we fired economic with
the shells we ’ad in ’and,
(’Orse-Gunners,
listen to my song!)
But the beggars under cover
’ad the impidence to stand,
An’ we couldn’t
keep ’em waitin’ very long.
And
the Captain, etc.
So we finished ‘arf
the liquor (an’ the Captain took champagne),
An’ the
Arabites was shootin’ all the while;
An’ we left our wounded
’appy with the empties on the plain,
An’ we used
the bloomin’ guns for pro-jec-tile!
We limbered up an’ galloped there
were nothin’ else to do
(’Orse-Gunners,
listen to my song!)
An’ the Battery come
a-boundin’ like a boundin’ kangaroo,
But they didn’t
watch us comin’ very long.
As
the Captain, etc.
We was goin’ most extended we
was drivin’ very fine,
An’ the
Arabites were loosin’ ‘igh an’ wide,
Till the Captain took the
glassy with a rattlin’ right incline,
An’ we dropped
upon their ’eads the other side.
Then we give ’em quarter such
as ’adn’t up and cut,
(’Orse-Gunners,
listen to my song!)
An’ the Captain stood
a limberful of fizzy somethin’ Brutt,
But we didn’t
leave it fizzing very long.
For
the Captain, etc.
We might ha’ been court-martialled,
but it all come out all right
When they signalled
us to join the main command.
There was every round expended,
there was every gunner tight,
An’ the
Captain waved a corkscrew in ’is ’and!
But
the Captain had ’is jacket, etc.