Chitra
Art thou the god with the
five darts, the Lord of Love?
Madana
I am he who was the first born
in the heart of the Creator. I
bind in bonds of pain and bliss the lives of
men and women!
Chitra
I know, I know what that pain
is and those bonds. And who art
thou, my lord?
Vasanta
I am his friend Vasanta the
King of the Seasons. Death and
decrepitude would wear the world to the bone
but that I follow
them and constantly attack them. I am Eternal
Youth.
Chitra
I bow to thee, Lord Vasanta.
Madana
But what stern vow is thine, fair stranger?
Why dost thou wither thy fresh youth with penance
and mortification? Such a sacrifice is
not fit for the worship of love. Who art thou
and what is thy prayer?
Chitra
I am Chitra, the daughter of the kingly
house of Manipur. With godlike grace Lord
Shiva promised to my royal grandsire an unbroken
line of male descent. Nevertheless, the divine
word proved powerless to change the spark of
life in my mother’s womb so
invincible was my nature, woman though I be.
Madana
I know, that is why thy father
brings thee up as his son. He has
taught thee the use of the bow and all the duties
of a king.
Chitra
Yes, that is why I am dressed in man’s
attire and have left the seclusion of a woman’s
chamber. I know no feminine wiles for winning
hearts. My hands are strong to bend the bow,
but I have never learnt Cupid’s archery,
the play of eyes.
Madana
That requires no schooling, fair
one. The eye does its work
untaught, and he knows how well, who is struck
in the heart.
Chitra
One day in search of game I roved alone
to the forest on the bank of the Purna river.
Tying my horse to a tree trunk I entered a dense
thicket on the track of a deer. I found a narrow
sinuous path meandering through the dusk of the
entangled boughs, the foliage vibrated with the
chirping of crickets, when of a sudden I came
upon a man lying on a bed of dried leaves, across my
path. I asked him haughtily to move aside,
but he heeded not. Then with the sharp
end of my bow I pricked him in contempt. Instantly
he leapt up with straight, tall limbs, like a sudden
tongue of fire from a heap of ashes. An
amused smile flickered round the corners of his
mouth, perhaps at the sight of my boyish countenance.
Then for the first time in my life I felt myself a
woman, and knew that a man was before me.
Madana
At the auspicious hour I teach
the man and the woman this supreme
lesson to know themselves. What happened
after that?
Chitra
With fear and wonder I asked him “Who
are you?” “I am Arjuna,” he said,
“of the great Kuru clan.” I stood
petrified like a statue, and forgot to do him
obeisance. Was this indeed Arjuna, the one great
idol of my dreams! Yes, I had long ago heard
how he had vowed a twelve-years’ celibacy.
Many a day my young ambition had spurred me
on to break my lance with him, to challenge him in
disguise to single combat, and prove my skill
in arms against him. Ah, foolish heart,
whither fled thy presumption? Could I but
exchange my youth with all its aspirations for the
clod of earth under his feet, I should deem it
a most precious grace. I know not in what
whirlpool of thought I was lost, when suddenly I saw
him vanish through the trees. O foolish woman,
neither didst thou greet him, nor speak a word,
nor beg forgiveness, but stoodest like a barbarian
boor while he contemptuously walked away! . .
. Next morning I laid aside my man’s clothing.
I donned bracelets, anklets, waist-chain, and
a gown of purple red silk. The unaccustomed
dress clung about my shrinking shame; but I hastened
on my quest, and found Arjuna in the forest temple
of Shiva.
Madana
Tell me the story to the end.
I am the heart-born god, and I
understand the mystery of these impulses.
Chitra
Only vaguely can I remember what things
I said, and what answer I got. Do not ask
me to tell you all. Shame fell on me like a
thunderbolt, yet could not break me to pieces,
so utterly hard, so like a man am I. His last
words as I walked home pricked my ears like red
hot needles. “I have taken the vow of celibacy.
I am not fit to be thy husband!” Oh,
the vow of a man! Surely thou knowest,
thou god of love, that unnumbered saints and sages
have surrendered the merits of their life-long
penance at the feet of a woman. I broke
my bow in two and burnt my arrows in the fire.
I hated my strong, lithe arm, scored by drawing the
bowstring. O Love, god Love, thou hast laid
low in the dust the vain pride of my manlike
strength; and all my man’s training lies crushed
under thy feet. Now teach me thy lessons; give
me the power of the weak and the weapon of the
unarmed hand.
Madana
I will be thy friend. I
will bring the world-conquering Arjuna a
captive before thee, to accept his rebellion’s
sentence at thy
hand.
Chitra
Had I but the time needed, I could
win his heart by slow degrees, and ask no help
of the gods. I would stand by his side as a
comrade, drive the fierce horses of his war-chariot,
attend him in the pleasures of the chase, keep
guard at night at the entrance of his tent, and
help him in all the great duties of a Kshatriya,
rescuing the weak, and meting out justice where it
is due. Surely at last the day would have
come for him to look at me and wonder, “What
boy is this? Has one of my slaves in a former
life followed me like my good deeds into this?”
I am not the woman who nourishes her despair
in lonely silence, feeding it with nightly tears
and covering it with the daily patient smile, a
widow from her birth. The flower of my desire
shall never drop into the dust before it has
ripened to fruit. But it is the labour
of a life time to make one’s true self known
and honoured. Therefore I have come to thy
door, thou world-vanquishing Love, and thou,
Vasanta, youthful Lord of the Seasons, take from my
young body this primal injustice, an unattractive plainness.
For a single day make me superbly beautiful, even
as beautiful as was the sudden blooming of love
in my heart. Give me but one brief day
of perfect beauty, and I will answer for the days that
follow.
Madana
Lady, I grant thy prayer.
Vasanta
Not for the short span of a day,
but for one whole year the charm
of spring blossoms shall nestle round thy limbs.