Arjuna
I woke in the morning and found
that my dreams had distilled a gem. I have
no casket to inclose it, no king’s crown whereon
to fix it, no chain from which to hang it, and
yet have not the heart to throw it away.
My Kshatriya’s right arm, idly occupied in
holding it, forgets its duties.
Enter Chitra.
Chitra
Tell me your thoughts, sir!
Arjuna
My mind is busy with thoughts of hunting
today. See, how the rain pours in torrents
and fiercely beats upon the hillside. The dark
shadow of the clouds hangs heavily over the forest,
and the swollen stream, like reckless youth,
overleaps all barriers with mocking laughter.
On such rainy days we five brothers would go to
the Chitraka forest to chase wild beasts. Those
were glad times. Our hearts danced to the
drumbeat of rumbling clouds. The woods
resounded with the screams of peacocks. Timid
deer could not hear our approaching steps for
the patter of rain and the noise of waterfalls;
the leopards would leave their tracks on the wet
earth, betraying their lairs. Our sport over,
we dared each other to swim across turbulent
streams on our way back home. The restless
spirit is on me. I long to go hunting.
Chitra
First run down the quarry you are now
following. Are you quite certain that the
enchanted deer you pursue must needs be caught?
No, not yet. Like a dream the wild creature
eludes you when it seems most nearly yours.
Look how the wind is chased by the mad rain
that discharges a thousand arrows after it. Yet
it goes free and unconquered. Our sport
is like that, my love! You give chase to
the fleet-footed spirit of beauty, aiming at her every
dart you have in your hands. Yet this magic
deer runs ever free and untouched.
Arjuna
My love, have you no home where kind
hearts are waiting for your return? A home
which you once made sweet with your gentle service
and whose light went out when you left it for this
wilderness?
Chitra
Why these questions? Are the
hours of unthinking pleasure over? Do you
not know that I am no more than what you see before
you? For me there is no vista beyond.
The dew that hangs on the tip of a Kinsuka petal
has neither name nor destination. It offers
no answer to any question. She whom you
love is like that perfect bead of dew.
Arjuna
Has she no tie with the world?
Can she be merely like a fragment
of heaven dropped on the earth through the carelessness
of a
wanton god?
Chitra
Yes.
Arjuna
Ah, that is why I always seem about
to lose you. My heart is unsatisfied, my
mind knows no peace. Come closer to me, unattainable
one! Surrender yourself to the bonds of name
and home and parentage. Let my heart feel
you on all sides and live with you in the peaceful
security of love.
Chitra
Why this vain effort to catch
and keep the tints of the clouds,
the dance of the waves, the smell of the flowers?
Arjuna
Mistress mine, do not hope to
pacify love with airy nothings.
Give me something to clasp, something that can
last longer than
pleasure, that can endure even through suffering.
Chitra
Hero mine, the year is not yet full,
and you are tired already! Now I know that
it is Heaven’s blessing that has made the flower’s
term of life short. Could this body of mine have
drooped and died with the flowers of last spring
it surely would have died with honour.
Yet, its days are numbered, my love. Spare
it not, press it dry of honey, for fear your beggar’s
heart come back to it again and again with unsated
desire, like a thirsty bee when summer blossoms
lie dead in the dust.