It was past twelve by the clock tower
when the two left the gondola and entered the Place
of St. Mark. The old church with its cupolas,
the open Place, the pillars with St. Theodore and
the dragon, the palace of the Doges with its open
stone work, showed like a scene out of another world;
so unearthly beautiful, so weird and so stately.
There had been that day some festival or public occasion
which had called the multitude together, and lingerers
were still to be seen here and there, and the windows
of cafes and trattorie were lighted, and the buzz of
voices came from them. Dolly and Rupert crossed
the square, however, without more than a moment’s
lingering, and plunged presently into what seemed
to her a labyrinth of confused ways. Such ways!
an alley in New York would be broad in comparison;
two women in hoops would have been obliged to use
some skill to pass each other; they threaded the old
city in the strangest manner. Rupert went steadily
and without hesitation, Dolly wondered how he could,
through one into another, up and down, over bridge
after bridge, clearly knowing his way; yet it was
a nervous walk to her, for more than one reason.
Sometimes the whole line of one of these narrow streets,
if they could be called so, would be perfectly dark;
the moonlight not getting into it, and only glittering
on a palace cornice or a street corner in view; others,
lying right for the moonbeams, were flooded with them
from one turning to another. Most of the shops
were closed; but the sellers of fruit had not shut
up their windows yet, and now and then a cook-shop
made a most peculiar picture, with its blazing fire
at the back, and its dishes of cooked and uncooked
viands temptingly displayed at the street front.
Steadily and swiftly Rupert and Dolly passed on; saw
these things without stopping to look at them, but
yet saw them so that in all after-life those peculiar
effects of light and shade, fireshine and moonlight,
Italian fruits and vegetables, and fish coloured by
the one or the other illumination, were never lost
from memory. Here there would be a red Vulcanic
glow in the interior of a shop where the furnace fire
was flaming up about the pots and pans of cookery;
and at the street front, at the window, the moonlight
glinting white from the edge of a dish, or glancing
from a pane of glass; and then again reflected from
the still waters of a canal. The two saw these
things, and never forgot; but Dolly was silent and
Rupert did not know what to say. Yet he thought
he felt her arm tremble sometimes, and would have
given a great deal to be able to speak to the purpose.
Perhaps Dolly at length found the need of distraction
to her thoughts, for she it was that first said anything.
“I hope mother will not wake up!”
“Why?”
“She would not understand my being away.”
“Then she does not know?”
“I did not dare tell her.
I had to risk it. I do not want her ever to know,
Rupert, if it can be helped.”
“She’ll be no wiser for
me. What are you going to do now, Miss Dolly?
We ain’t far off the place.”
“I am going to get my father
to go home with me. You needn’t come in.
Better not. You go back to the gondola and wait
there for a little say a quarter or half
an hour; if I do not come before that, then go on
home.”
“But you cannot go anywhere alone?”
“Oh no; I shall have father;
but I cannot tell which way he may take to get home.
You go back to the gondola, or no, be in
front of St. Mark’s; that would be better.”
“I am afraid to leave you, Miss Dolly.”
“You need not. One gets
to places where there is nothing to fear any more.”
Rupert was not sure what she meant;
her voice had a peculiar cadence which struck him.
Then they turned another corner, and a few steps ahead
of them saw the light from a window making a strip
of illumination across the street, which here was
unvisited by the moonbeams.
“That is the place,” said Rupert.
Dolly slackened her walk, and the
next minute paused before the window and looked in.
The light was not brilliant, yet sufficient to show
several men within, some sitting and drinking, some
in attendance; and Dolly easily recognised one among
the former number. She drew her arm from Rupert’s.
“Now go back to St. Mark’s,”
she whispered. “I wish it. Yes, I would
rather go in alone. Wait for me a little while
in front of St. Mark’s.”
She stood still yet half a minute,
making her observations or getting up her resolution;
then with a light, swift step passed into the shop.
Rupert could not obey her and go at once; he felt he
must see what she did and what her reception promised
to be; he came a little nearer to the window and gazed
anxiously in. The minutes he stood there burned
the scene for ever into his memory.
The light shone in a wide, spacious
apartment, which it but gloomily revealed. There
was nothing whatever of the outward attractions with
which in New York or London a drinking saloon, not
of a low order, would have been made pleasant and
inviting. The wine had need to be good, thought
Rupert, when men would come to such a place as this
and spend time there, simply for the pleasure of drinking
it. Yet several men were there, taking that pleasure,
even so late as the hour was; and they were respectable
men, at least if their dress could be taken in testimony.
They sat with mugs and glasses before them; one had
a plate of olives also, another had some other tit-bit
or provocative; one seemed to be in converse with
Mr. Copley, who was not beyond converse yet, though
Rupert saw he had been some time drinking. His
face was flushed a little, his eyes dull, his features
overspread with that inane stupidity which comes from
long-continued and purely sensual indulgence of any
kind, especially under the fumes of wine. To the
side of this man, Rupert saw Dolly go. She went
in, as I said, with a light, quick step, looked at
nobody else, made straight to her father, and laid
a hand upon his shoulder. With that she threw
back her head-covering a little, it was
some sort of a scarf, of white and brown worsted knitting,
which lay around her head like a glory, in Rupert’s
eyes, and showed her face to her father.
Fair and delicate and sweet, bright and grave at once,
for she did look bright even there, she stood
at his side like his good angel, with her little hand
upon his shoulder. No wonder Mr. Copley started
and looked frightened; that was the first look; and
then confused. Rupert understood it all, though
he could not hear what was said. He saw the man
was embarrassed.
“Dolly!” said Mr. Copley,
falling back upon his first thought, as the easiest
to speak of, “what is the matter?”
“Nothing with me, father. Will you take
me home?”
“Where’s your mother?”
“She is at home. But it is pretty late,
father.”
“Where’s Lawrence?”
“I don’t know.”
“Where is Rupert, then?”
“He is out, somewhere. Will you go home
with me, father?”
“How did you come here?”
said Mr. Copley, sitting a little straighter up, and
now beginning to replace or conceal confusion with
displeasure.
“I will tell you. I will
tell you on the way. But shall we go first, father?
I don’t like to stay here.”
“Here? What in the name
of ten thousand devils Who brought
you here?”
“I am alone,” said Dolly.
“Hadn’t we better go, father? and then
we can talk as we go.”
At this point a half tipsy Venetian
rose, and stepping before the pair with a low reverence,
said something to Mr. Copley, of which Dolly only
understood the words, “La bella signorina;”
they made her, however, draw her scarf forward over
her face and brought Mr. Copley to his feet.
He could stand, she saw, but whether he could walk
very well was open to question.
“Signer, signor”
he began, stammering and incensed. Dolly seized
his arm.
“Shall we go, father? It
is so late, and mother might want me. It is very
late, father. Never mind anything, but come!”
Mr. Copley was sufficiently himself
to see the necessity; nevertheless, his score must
be paid; and his head was in a bad condition for reckoning.
He brought out some silver from his pocket, and stood
somewhat helplessly looking at it and at the shopman
alternately; then with an awkward movement of his
elbow contrived to throw over a glass, which fell
on the floor and broke. Everybody was looking
now at the father and daughter, and words came to
Dolly’s ears which made her cheek burn.
But she stood calm, self-possessed, waiting with a
somewhat lofty air of maidenly dignity; helped her
father solve the reckoning, paid for the glass, and
at last got hold of his arm and drew him away; after
a gentle, grave salutation to the attendant which he
answered profoundly, and which brought everybody in
the little shop to his feet in involuntary admiration
and respect. Dolly looked at nobody, yet with
sweet courtesy made a distant sign of acknowledgment
to their homage, and the next minute stood outside
the shop in the dark little street and the mild, still
air. I think, even at that minute, with the strange,
startling inappropriateness of license which thoughts
give themselves, there flashed across her a sense
of the ironical contrast of things without and within
her; without, Venice and her historical past and her
monumental glory; within, a trembling little heart
and present danger and a burden of dishonour.
But that was only a flash; the needs of the minute
banished all thinking that was not connected with
action; and the moment’s business was to get
her father home. She had no thought now for the
picturesque revealings of the moonlight and obscurings
of the shadow. Yet she was conscious of them,
in that sharp flash of contrast.
At getting upon his feet and out into
the air and gloom of the little street, Mr. Copley’s
head was very contused; or else he had taken more
wine than his daughter guessed. He was not fit
to guide himself, or to take care of her. As
he seemed utterly at a standstill, Dolly naturally
and unconsciously set her face to go the way she had
come; for one or two turnings at least she was sure
of it. Before those one or two turnings were
made, however, she was shocked and scared to find that
her father’s walk was wavering; he swayed a little
on his feet. The street was empty; and if it
had not been, what help could Dolly ask for?
A pang of great terror shot through her. She took
her father’s arm, to endeavour to hold him fast;
a task rather too much for her little hands and slight
frame; and feeling that in spite of her he still moved
unsteadily, and that she was an insufficient help,
Dolly’s anguish broke forth in a cry; natural
enough in its unreasoningness
“O father, don’t! remember,
I am all alone!”
How much was in the tone of those
last words Dolly could not know; they hardly reached
Mr. Copley’s sense, though they went through
and through another hearer. The next minute Rupert
stood before the pair, and was offering his arm to
Mr. Copley. Not trusting his patron, in the circumstances,
to take care of his young mistress, Rupert had disobeyed
her orders so far as to keep the two figures in sight;
he had watched them from one turning to another, and
had seen that his help was needed, even before he
heard Dolly’s cry. Then, with a spring,
he was there. Mr. Copley leaned now upon his
arm, and Dolly fell behind, thankful unspeakably for
the relief. She knew by this time that she could
never have found her way; and it was plain her father
could not.
“Rupert,” said Mr. Copley,
half recognising the assistance afforded him, “you’re
a good fellow, and always in the way when you aren’t
wanted, by George!” But he leaned on his arm
heavily.
Dolly followed close; she could not
well keep beside them; and felt in that hour more
thoroughly lonely perhaps than at any other of her
life before or after. Rupert was a relief; and
yet so the shame was increased. She stepped along
through moonlight and shadow, feeling that light was
gone out of her pathway of life for ever, as far as
this world was concerned. What was left, when
her father was lost to her? her father! and
not by death; that would not have been to lose
him utterly; but now his very identity was gone.
Her father, whom all her life she had loved; manly,
frank, able, active, taking the lead in every society
where she had seen him, making other men do his bidding
always, until the passion of gaining and the lust of
drink got hold of him! Was it the same, that
figure in front of her, leaning on somebody’s
arm and glad to lean, and going with lame, unsteady
gait whither he was led, so like the way his mental
course had been lately? Was that her father?
The bitterness of Dolly’s feeling it is impossible
to put into words. Tears could bring no relief,
and nature did not summon them to the impossible service.
The fire at her heart would have burnt them up; for
there was a strange passion of resistance and sense
of wrong mixed with Dolly’s bitter pain.
The way was not short, and it seemed threefold the
length it was; every step was so hard, and the crowd
of thoughts was so disproportionately great.
They were rather ruminating thoughts
of grief and pain, than considerative of what was
to be done. For the first, the thing was to get
Mr. Copley home. Dolly did not look beyond that.
She was glad to find herself arrived at St. Mark’s
again; and presently they were all three in the gondola.
Mr. Copley leaned in a corner, laid his head against
a cushion, and slept, or seemed to sleep. The
other two were as silent; but I think both felt at
the moment as if they would never sleep again.
Rupert’s face was in shadow; he watched Dolly’s
face which was in light. She forgot it could
be watched; her eyes stared into the moonshine, not
seeing it, or looking through it; the sweet face was
so very grave that the watcher felt his heart ache.
Not the gentle gravity of young maidenhood, looking
into the vague light; but the anxious, searching gaze
of older life looking into the vague darkness.
Rupert did not dare speak to her, though he longed.
What would he not have given for the right and the
power to comfort! But he knew he had neither.
He had sense enough not to try.
It was customary for Mr. Copley, after
he had been late out at night, to keep to his room
until a late hour the next morning; so Dolly knew
what she had to expect. It suited her very well
this time, for she must think what she would say to
her father when she next saw him. She took care
that a cup of coffee such as he liked was sent him;
and then, after her own slight breakfast, sat down
to plan her movements. So Rupert found her, with
her Bible in her lap, but not reading; sitting gazing
out upon the bright waters of the lagoon. He came
up to her, with a depth of understanding and sympathy
in his plain features which greatly dignified them.
“Does that help?” said
he, glancing at the book in Dolly’s lap.
“This?” said Dolly.
“What other help in the world is there?”
“Friends?” suggested Rupert.
“Yes, you were a great help
last night,” Dolly said slowly. “But
there come times and things when
friends cannot do anything.”
“And then what does the book do?”
“The book?” Dolly repeated
again. “O Rupert! it tells of the Friend
that can do everything!” Her eyes flushed with
tears and she clasped her hands as she spoke.
“What?” said Rupert; for
her action was eloquent, and he was curious; and besides
he liked to make her talk.
Dolly looked at him and saw that the
question was serious. She opened her book.
“Listen. ’Let your
conversation be without covetousness; and be content
with such things as ye have; for He hath said, I will
never leave thee nor forsake thee. So that we
may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will
not fear what man shall do unto me.’”
“That makes pretty close work
of it. Can you get hold of that rope? and how
much strain will it bear?”
“I believe it will bear anything,”
said Dolly slowly and thoughtfully; “if one
takes hold with both hands. I guess the trouble
with me is, that I only take hold with one.”
“What do you do with the other hand?”
“Stretch it out towards something else, I suppose.
For, see here,
Rupert; ’Thou wilt keep him in perfect
peace, whose mind is stayed on
Thee; because he trusteth in Thee.’ I
am just ashamed of myself!” said
Dolly, breaking down and bursting into tears.
“What for?” said Rupert.
“Because I do not trust so.”
“I should think it would be very difficult.”
“It ought not to be difficult
to trust a friend whose truth you know. There!
that has done me good,” said the girl, sitting
up and brushing away the tears. “Rupert,
if there is anything you want to see or to do here
in Venice, be about it; for I think we shall go off
to Rome at once.”
She told the same thing to St. Leger
when he came in; and having got rid of both the young
men set herself anew to consider how she should speak
to her father. And consideration helped nothing;
she could not tell; she had to leave it to the moment
to decide.
It was late in the morning, later
than the usual hour for the dejeuner a la fourchette,
which Mr. Copley liked. He did not want anything
to-day, his wife said; and she and Dolly and Rupert
had finished their meal. Dolly contrived then
that her mother should go out under Rupert’s
convoy, to visit the curiosity shop again, (nothing
else would have tempted her), and to make one or two
little purchases for which Dolly gave Rupert the means.
When they were fairly off, she went to her father’s
room; he was up and dressed, she knew. She went
with a very faint heart, not knowing in the least
what she would do or say, but feeling that something
must be said and done, both.
Mr. Copley was sitting listlessly
in a chair by the window; miserable enough, Dolly
could see by the gloomy blank of his face; looking
out, and caring for nothing that he saw. His
features showed traces of the evening before, in red
eyes and pale cheeks; and yet worse, in the spiritless,
abased expression, which was more than Dolly could
bear. She had come in very quietly, but when
she saw this she made one spring to his side and sank
down on the floor before him, hiding her face on his
knee. Mr. Copley’s trembling hand presently
lifted her up into his arms, and Dolly sat on his
knee and buried her face in his breast. Neither
of them was ready to speak; neither did speak for some
time. It was Mr. Copley who began.
“Well, Dolly, I suppose
you will say to me that I have broken my word?”
“O father!” it
came in a sort of despair from Dolly’s heart, “what
shall we do?”
Mr. Copley had certainly no answer
ready to this question; and his next words were a
departure.
“How came you to be at that place last night?”
“I was afraid you were there”
“How did you dare come poking
about through all those crooked ways, and at that
time of night?”
“Father,” Dolly said,
without lifting her head, “that was nothing.
I dared nothing, compared with what you dared!”
“I? You are mistaken, child.
I did not run the slightest risk. In fact, I
was only doing what everybody else does. You make
much of nothing, in your inexperience.”
“Father,” said Dolly,
with a great effort, “you promised me. And
when a man cannot keep his promise”
She had meant to be perfectly quiet;
she had begun very calmly; but at that word, suddenly,
her calmness failed her. It was too much; and
with a sort of wailing cry, which in its forlornness
reached and wrung even Mr. Copley’s nerves,
she broke into a terrible passion of weeping.
Terrible! young hearts ought never to know such an
agony; and never, never should such an agony be known
for the shame or even the weakness of a father.
The hand appointed to shield, the love which ought
to shelter, when the blow comes from that
quarter, it finds the heart bare and defenceless indeed,
and comes so much the harder in that it comes from
so near. No other more distant can give such a
stroke. And to the young heart, unaccustomed
to sorrow, new to life, not knowing how many its burdens
and how heavy; not knowing on the other hand the equalising,
tempering effects of time; the first great pain comes
crushing. The shoulders are not adjusted to the
burden, and they feel as if they must break.
Dolly’s sobs were so convulsive and racking that
her father was startled and shocked. What had
he done? Alas, the man never knows what he has
done; he cannot understand how women die, before their
time, that death of the heart which is out of the range
of masculine nature.
“Dolly! Dolly!”
Mr. Copley cried, “what is the matter? Don’t,
Dolly, if you love me. My child, what have I
done? Don’t you know everybody takes
a little wine? Are you wiser than all the world?”
“You promised, father!” Dolly managed
to say.
“Perhaps I promised too much.
You see, Dolly, don’t cry so! a
man must do as the rest of the world do. It isn’t
possible to live a separate life, as you would have
me. It would make me ridiculous. It would
not do. There’s no harm in a little wine,
child.”
“Father, you promised!”
Dolly repeated, clinging to him. She was not
shrinking away; her arms of love were wrapped round
his neck as tenderly as even in old childish days;
they had power over Mr. Copley, power which he could
not quite resist nor break away from. He returned
their pressure, he even kissed her, feeling, I am happy
to say, a little ashamed of himself.
“You don’t want me to
be ridiculous, Dolly?” he repeated, not knowing
what to say.
What should she answer to that?
No, she did not want him to be ridiculous; and as
he spoke she recalled the staggering, impotent figure
of last night, in its unmanly feebleness and senseless
idiocy. A sense of the difficulty of her task
and the vanity of her representations came over Dolly;
it gave her new food for tears, but the present effect
was to make her stop them. I suppose despair does
not weep. Dolly was not despairing, either.
“What shall we do, father?”
she asked, ignoring all his remarks and suggestions.
“Do, Dolly? About what?”
“Don’t you think we will not stay any
longer in Venice?”
“For all I care! Where, then?”
“To Rome, father?”
“I thought you were to be in Rome at Christmas?”
“It is not so very long till Christmas.”
“Is your mother agreed?”
“She will be, if you say so.”
“If it pleases you, Dolly I don’t
care.”
“And, father, dear father! won’t
you keep your promise to me? What is to become
of us, father?”
Some bitter tears flowed again as
she said this quietly; but Mr. Copley knew they were
flowing, and he had an intuitive sense that they were
bitter. They embarrassed him.
“I’ll make a bargain,
Dolly,” he said after a pause. “I’ll
do what you want of me anything you want if
you’ll marry St. Leger.”
“But, father, I have not made up my mind to
like him enough for that.”
“You will like him well enough.
If you were to marry him you would be devoted to him.
I know you.”
“I think the devotion ought to come first.”
“Nonsense. That is romantic
folly. Novels are one thing, and real life is
another.”
“I daresay; but do you object to people’s
being a little romantic?”
“When it interferes with their bread and butter,
I do.”
“Father, if you would drink
no wine, we could all of us have as much bread and
butter as we choose.”
“You are always harping on that!” said
Mr. Copley, frowning.
“Because, our whole life depends
on it, father. You cannot bear wine as some people
can, I suppose; the habit is growing on you; mother
and I are losing you, we do not even have but half
a sight of you; and father we
are wanting necessaries. But I do not think of
that,” Dolly went on eagerly; “I
do not care; I am willing to live on dry bread, and
work for the means to get it; but I cannot bear to
lose you, father! I cannot bear it! and
it will kill mother. She does not know; I have
kept her from knowing; she knows nothing about what
happened last night. O father, do not let her
know! Would anything pay you for breaking her
heart and mine? Is wine more to you than we are?
O father, father! let us go home to America, and quit
all these people and associations that make it so
hard for you to be yourself. I want you to be
your dear old self, father! Your dear self, that
I love”
Dolly’s voice was choked, and
she sobbed. Mr. Copley was not quite insensible.
He was silent a good while, hearing her sobs, and then
he groaned; a groan partly of real feeling, partly,
I am afraid, of desire to have the scene ended; the
embarrassment and the difficulty disposed of and behind
him. But he thought it had been an expression
of deeper feeling solely.
“I’ll do anything you
like, my dear child,” he said. “Only
stop crying. You break my heart.”
“Father, will you really do something if I ask
you?”
“Anything! Only stop crying so.”
“Then, father, write and sign
it, that you will not ever touch wine. Rupert
and I have taken such a pledge already.”
“What is the use of writing
and signing? I don’t see. A man can
let it alone without that.”
“He can, if he wants to let
it alone; but if he is very much tempted, then the
pledge is a help.”
“What did you and Rupert do such a thing as
that for?”
“I wanted to save him.”
“Make him take the pledge, then.
Why you?”
“How could I ask him to do what
I would not do myself? But I’ve done it,
father; now will you join us?”
“Pshaw!” said Mr. Copley,
displeased. “Now you have incapacitated
yourself from appearing as others do in society.
How would you refuse, if you were asked to drink wine
with somebody at a dinner-table?”
“Very easily. I should
think all women would refuse,” said Dolly.
“Father, will you join us, and let us all be
unfashionable and happy together?”
“Did St. Leger pledge himself?”
“I have not asked him.”
“Well, I will if he will.”
“For him, father, and not for me?” said
Dolly.
“Ask him,” said Mr. Copley. “I’ll
do as he does.”
“Father, you might set an example to him.”
“I’ll let him set the
example for me,” said Mr. Copley rising.
And Dolly could get no further.
But it was settled that they were
to leave Venice. What was to be gained by this
step Dolly did not quite know; yet it was a step, that
was something. It was something, too, to get out
of the neighbourhood of that wine-shop, of which Dolly
thought with horror. What might await them in
Rome she did not know; at least the bonds of habit
in connection with a particular locality would be
broken. And Venice was grown odious to her.