The bachelor who entertains is a most
popular member of society. It does not cost a
fortune to return in some manner the civilities once
received, and every man, even if his income be limited,
can once in a while entertain, even if it be on a
very small scale and in a very modest way. Bachelor
functions are always enjoyable. For a host of
moderate income, I would suggest a luncheon, a dinner,
or a party to the play, followed by a little supper.
A bachelor luncheon can be given either
at the host’s apartments or chambers, at a restaurant,
or in the ladies’ annex of his club, if that
organization possesses such an institution.
At all entertainments given under
a bachelor’s vine and fig tree, extreme simplicity
should be a characteristic. The table linen should
be of the finest damask, or the best material his
income will allow; the glass perfectly plain, clear
crystal, the china of a rich but quiet pattern, the
silver good but absolutely without ornamental devices
of any kind. In fact, the silver can be limited
to forks and spoons, and the rest Sheffield or prince’s
plate. Silver is not expensive, but plate is
considered quite smart, and it has the advantage of
being utterly valueless from the burglar’s point
of view.
Individual salt and pepper affairs,
cut or colored glass, or the hundred and one knick-knacks
which one sees advertised and which eventually find
their way to the boarding-house table, are vulgar.
Before your cloth is laid you should
have a cover of felt placed over the table, so as
to form a shield between it and the damask or linen.
In the center goes a silver or plated fernery, filled
with ferns and asparagus vines, on a mirror tray,
or an epergne with fruit. Two heavy, old-fashioned
decanters in Queen Anne coasters should be placed,
one at your right and the other at the right of your
vis-a-vis. These contain sherry and claret.
Four plain silver, plated, or china dishes are at
the corners with salted almonds, olives, bonbons,
and fancy cakes. If you wish to be very effective
and have the money to spare, it is smart at a dinner
to have silver candlesticks with candles or tiny lamps
gleaming behind red or pink shades at each cover.
Two or three forks are laid at the left of each plate.
If more are required, your servant will replace them.
On the right of the plate are the knives, including
one for the roast, with the tablespoon for the soup,
if it is a dinner, and the oyster fork. The napkins
should be plain and flat, and contain a roll of bread.
These hints for arranging the table will do for either
luncheon or dinner. Not one of the articles is
in itself expensive, and you may possess them all
with the accumulation of years. If not, a simpler
arrangement could be effected, or you could give the
entertainment at a restaurant instead of your rooms
or house. The invitations can be either verbal
or written, but at best a luncheon or dinner in a
bachelor’s apartments is regarded as a little
frolic, and you must try to preserve the spirit and
waive the formalities.
A chaperon, of course, is necessary.
The party can be limited to about eight. If you
have a manservant he should be dressed in black coat
and trousers, white shirt, standing collar and tie,
and liveried waistcoat. His duties are to open
the door and to serve the luncheon. But a manservant
is not necessary. Some of the smartest bachelors
in New York give delightful little dinners and luncheons
at their apartments, at which the maid who has cooked
the meal, dressed in white apron and black gown, also
serves it.
The menu should be the usual
one expected at luncheons, but champagne is never
offered by a man to women in his apartments, unless
at dinner or a theater supper. If a wealthy bachelor
has a large house, and instead of one there are a
number of matrons chaperoning, the case is different.
Manhattan or Martini cocktails could be passed around
before luncheon, or some little peculiar dish be served
to give a zest to the occasion.
A bachelor’s dinner at
his house or apartments is a more formal entertainment,
but it differs in nowise from a regular function of
that character. The chaperon takes the place
of the lady of the house for that occasion. Dressing
rooms are arranged for the men and women, and the
same ceremonies observed as at any formal dinner.
If the affair is given in apartments, of course the
character must be more or less informal, as the accommodations
are limited. Should you have a man serve at your
dinner, he must be in evening dress. Both at dinner
and at luncheon he must have gloves, but this is not
required of a maid.
A bachelor’s supper in his own
apartments is sometimes given after the play.
Of the menu, I will speak a little farther on.
A chafing-dish supper is, however, an unique and enjoyable
entertainment. Several chafing dishes should
be ready, so that each course can follow without delay.
Terrapin, truffled eggs, curried oysters, and other
dainties of this kind comprise usually the menu.
It would be well to serve first oysters on the half
shell, followed by lobster a la Newburg, the
latter being the first plat cooked with the
chafing dish. Champagne is a good wine, and allowable
for a chafing-dish supper; but if Welsh rarebits are
the chef d’oeuvre, then beer or ale would
be better.
A theater party should be confined
to eight or ten. A parti carre four
people is delightful. Unmarried women
do not go to theaters or restaurants with a man alone.
They must be chaperoned, even at a matinee or a luncheon
party at a hotel or restaurant in fact,
an unmarried couple is seldom seen at public places
in New York, unless they are engaged, and married
women are as much compromised as unmarried ones by
indifference to this absolute rule of etiquette.
The invitations can be either verbal
or written. In the season it is better to write
them, to insure the acceptance of guests. Be careful
in the wording to give not only the evening, but the
name of the play and the theater. For a party,
always secure end seats, and there will be no disturbing
of others in case you might be a little late.
A box is necessary at the circus or at a music hall,
but orchestra seats or stalls are the best selection
for a bachelor’s party. Many mothers object
to their daughters being seen at the theater in a proscenium
box.
The rendezvous or meeting place should
be at the chaperon’s. The vestibule of
the theater is awkward, except for parties of four.
A stage is the best vehicle to convey your guests
to the playhouse. At the theater the host sees
that his guests are provided with playbills. He
gives the tickets to the usher, and precedes the party
down the aisle. He indicates the order of sitting.
A man should go in first, followed by the woman with
whom he is to sit, and then, thus sandwiched, the rest
of the party file in, the host taking the aisle or
end seat. The host sits next to the chaperon.
Gentlemen do not go out between the acts at the theater,
but sometimes, when there is a party to the opera,
they can leave their seats if other men come to visit
the ladies. A man going in or out a theater aisle
should do so with his face toward the stage and his
back to the seat. A host never leaves his guests.
After the play go a little ahead and give your carriage
check to the porter as soon as possible, so that there
may not be a long wait. The porter expects a
small fee. All theater parties are followed by
a supper given either at a restaurant, at the club,
in the ladies’ annex, or at your bachelor apartments.
All luncheons, dinners, or suppers
at a restaurant, unless organized on the spur of the
moment, are ordered beforehand, and everything, including
the waiter’s tip, arranged and settled for.
If you have not an account at the restaurant, pay
the bill at the time you order the menu and
reserve the table. Flowers should be included,
and a centerpiece of roses, which are so arranged
as to come apart and be distributed in bunches to
each of your fair guests, is one of the favorite devices.
Small boutonnières are provided for the men.
The public restaurant or dining room is the place
for a bachelor supper when ladies are guests.
A private room is not proper, and your guests want
to see and be seen. The chaperon is seated at
the right hand of the host, unless the party is given
in honor of a particular woman, in which case she has
that place. The chaperon is then at your left.
Wraps and coats are taken off in the hall of the restaurant
and checked. There is no order of entry, except
that the host should precede and the others follow.
The usual menu for a theater supper is:
I. Clams or oysters on the half shell.
II. Bouillon in cups.
III. Chicken croquettes or sweetbreads
with peas, or lobster a la
Newburg.
IV. Terrapin or birds with salad.
V. Ices, cakes, cafe noir, bonbons.
VI. Liqueurs.
With the oysters or clams white wine
is served. Champagne follows the bouillon until
the end of the supper.
After supper the party usually returns
to the residence of the chaperon, where the unmarried
women have their maids and family escorts awaiting
them. The host accompanies them to the chaperon’s
house, but the other men take leave at the restaurant.
The chaperon may have it arranged to have dancing
at her house, in which case the party return with her
after supper.
A supper in the ladies’ annex
in nowise differs from this, except that you do not
tip the waiter or pay the bill, but have it charged
in your monthly account.
The menu for a supper at your
own apartments follows the same lines as those already
given.
Theater clubs are associations
of women and men, all subscribing, meeting at the
houses of different members, one of whom gives the
supper.
Bachelors’ dances or
balls are given at a large hall by a number
of unmarried men, who subscribe a certain amount each.
A number of well-known matrons are asked to receive
the guests, and a cotillon usually follows the supper.
Impromptu lunches, dinners,
or suppers at restaurants sometimes require
the immediate settlement of the account. Be careful
to draw from your pocketbook a bill of large denomination,
and not a handful of change. Do not con over
or dispute the items. If you have an account,
simply sign the check. If not, it is best to give
the waiter his tip and go to the desk and pay while
the members of your party are getting their wraps.
Dinners at restaurants are
frequently given by bachelors, and are followed by
a visit to the theater. The rendezvous is either
at the house of the chaperon or at the restaurant
itself, should the party be limited in number.
The menu varies according to
the season. Six courses, including raw oysters
or clams, soup, fish, entree, roast and vegetables,
birds and salad, ices and dessert, are sufficient.
The form and manner of entertaining at a dinner of
this kind are similar to those observed at suppers.
To a man who frequently entertains,
and at a particular restaurant, an occasional tip
to the head waiter would be of service. This is
a word to the wise.
Card parties for the playing
of whist, domino, or poker are often given by bachelors
at their apartments or residences. In apartments
this class of entertainment is only for men.
Women should not go to bachelors’ apartments
except for luncheon, dinner, or supper. In a
bachelor’s house, however, any entertainment
can be given. Small stakes are played for and
the usual supper follows. The farewell bachelor
dinner will have its proper place in the chapter
on Wedding Etiquette.