AN ARROW FINDS A BREAST
As he entered the new sphere of Jasmine’s
influence, charm, and existence, Ian Stafford’s
mind became flooded by new impressions. He was
not easily moved by vastness or splendour. His
ducal grandfather’s houses were palaces, the
estates were a fair slice of two counties, and many
of his relatives had sumptuous homes stored with priceless
legacies of art. He had approached the great house
which Byng had built for himself with some trepidation;
for though Byng came of people whose names counted
for a good deal in the north of England, still, in
newly acquired fortunes made suddenly in new lands
there was something that coarsened taste an
unmodulated, if not a garish, elegance which “hit
you in the eye,” as he had put it to himself.
He asked himself why Byng had not been content to
buy one of the great mansions which could always be
had in London for a price, where time had softened
all the outlines, had given that subdued harmony in
architecture which only belongs to age. Byng
could not buy with any money those wonderful Adam’s
mantels, over-mantels and ceilings which had a glory
quite their own. There must, therefore, be an
air of newness in the new mansion, which was too much
in keeping with the new money, the gold as yet not
worn smooth by handling, the staring, brand-new sovereigns
looking like impostors.
As he came upon the great house, however,
in the soft light of evening, he was conscious of
no violence done to his artistic sense. It was
a big building, severely simple in design, yet with
the rich grace, spacious solidity, and decorative
relief of an Italian palace: compact, generous,
traditionally genuine and wonderfully proportionate.
“Egad, Byng, you had a good
architect and good sense!” he said
to himself. “It’s the real thing;
and he did it before Jasmine came on the scene too.”
The outside of the house was Byng’s,
but the inside would, in the essentials, of course,
be hers; and he would see what he would see.
When the door opened, it came to him
instantly that the inside and outside were in harmony.
How complete was that harmony remained to be seen,
but an apparently unstudied and delightful reticence
was noticeable at once. The newness had been
rubbed off the gold somehow, and the old furniture Italian,
Spanish which relieved the spaciousness
of the entrance gave an air of Time and Time’s
eloquence to this three-year-old product of modern
architectural skill.
As he passed on, he had more than
a glimpse of the ball-room, which maintained the dignity
and the refined beauty of the staircase and the hallways;
and only in the insistent audacity and intemperate
colouring of some Rubens pictures did he find anything
of that inherent tendency to exaggeration and Oriental
magnificence behind the really delicate artistic faculties
possessed by Jasmine.
The drawing-room was charming.
It was not quite perfect, however. It was too
manifestly and studiously arranged, and it had the
finnicking exactness of the favourite gallery of some
connoisseur. For its nobility of form, its deft
and wise softness of colouring, its half-smothered
Italian joyousness of design in ceiling and cornice,
the arrangement of choice and exquisite furniture
was too careful, too much like the stage. He
smiled at the sight of it, for he saw and knew that
Jasmine had had his playful criticism of her occasionally
flamboyant taste in mind, and that she had over-revised,
as it were. She had, like a literary artist,
polished and refined and stippled the effect, till
something of personal touch had gone, and there remained
classic elegance without the sting of life and the
idiosyncrasy of its creator’s imperfections.
No, the drawing-room would not quite do, though it
was near the perfect thing. His judgment was not
yet complete, however. When he was shown into
Jasmine’s sitting-room his breath came a little
quicker, for here would be the real test; and curiosity
was stirring greatly in him.
Yes, here was the woman herself, wilful,
original, delightful, with a flower-like delicacy
joined to a determined and gorgeous audacity.
Luxury was heaped on luxury, in soft lights from Indian
lamps and lanterns, in the great divan, the deep lounge,
the piled-up cushions, the piano littered with incongruous
if artistic bijouterie; but everywhere, everywhere,
books in those appealing bindings and with that paper
so dear to every lover of literature. Instinctively
he picked them up one by one, and most of them were
affectionately marked by marginal notes of criticism,
approval, or reference; and all showing the eager,
ardent mind of one who loved books. He noticed,
however, that most of the books he had seen before,
and some of them he had read with her in the days
which were gone forever. Indeed, in one of them
he found some of his own pencilled marginal notes,
beneath which she had written her insistent opinions,
sometimes with amazing point. There were few
new books, and they were mostly novels; and it was
borne in on him that not many of these annotated books
belonged to the past three years. The millions
had come, the power and the place; but something had
gone with their coming.
He was turning over the pages of a
volume of Browning when she entered; and she had an
instant to note the grace and manly dignity of his
figure, the poise of the intellectual head the
type of a perfect, well-bred animal, with the accomplishment
of a man of purpose and executive design. A little
frown of trouble came to her forehead, but she drove
it away with a merry laugh, as he turned at the rustle
of her skirts and came forward.
He noted her blue dress, he guessed
the reason she had put it on; and he made an inward
comment of scorn. It was the same blue, and it
was near the same style of the dress she wore the
last time he saw her. She watched to see whether
it made any impression on him, and was piqued to observe
that he who had in that far past always swept her with
an admiring, discriminating, and deferential glance,
now only gave her deference of a courteous but perfunctory
kind. It made the note to all she said and did
that evening the daring, the brilliance,
the light allusion to past scenes and happenings,
the skilful comment on the present, the joyous dominance
of a position made supreme by beauty and by gold;
behind which were anger and bitterness, and wild and
desperate revolt.
For, if love was dead in him, and
respect, and all that makes man’s association
with woman worth while, humiliation and the sting of
punishment and penalty were alive in her, flaying her
spirit, rousing that mad streak which was in her grandfather,
who had had many a combat, the outcome of wild elements
of passion in him. She was not happy; she had
never been happy since she married Rudyard Byng; yet
she had said to herself so often that she might have
been at peace, in a sense, had it not been for the
letter which Ian Stafford had written her, when she
turned from him to the man she married.
The passionate resolve to compel him
to reproach himself in soul for his merciless, if
subtle, indictment of her to bring him to the old
place where he had knelt in spirit so long ago ah,
it was so long! came to her. Self-indulgent
and pitifully mean as she had been, still this man
had influenced her more than any other in the world in
that region where the best of herself lay, the place
to which her eyes had turned always when she wanted
a consoling hour. He belonged to her realm of
the imagination, of thought, of insight, of intellectual
passions and the desires of the soul. Far above
any physical attraction Ian had ever possessed for
her was the deep conviction that he gave her mind
what no one else gave it, that he was the being who
knew the song her spirit sang.... He should not
go forever from her and with so cynical a completeness.
He should return; he should not triumph in his self-righteousness,
be a living reproach to her always by his careless
indifference to everything that had ever been between
them. If he treated her so because of what she
had done to him, with what savagery might not she
be treated, if all that had happened in the last three
years were open as a book before him!
Her husband she had not
thought of that. So much had happened in the
past three years; there had been so much adulation
and worship and daring assault upon her heart or
emotions from quarters of unusual distinction,
that the finest sense of her was blunted, and true
proportions were lost. Rudyard ought never to
have made that five months’ visit to South Africa
a year before, leaving her alone to make the fight
against the forces round her. Those five months
had brought a change in her, had made her indignant
at times against Rudyard.
“Why did he go to South Africa?
Why did he not take me with him? Why did he leave
me here alone?” she had asked herself. She
did not realize that there would have been no fighting
at all, that all the forces contending against her
purity and devotion would never have gathered at her
feet and washed against the shores of her resolution,
if she had loved Rudyard Byng when she married him
as she might have loved him, ought to have loved him.
The faithful love unconsciously announces
its fidelity, and men instinctively are aware of it,
and leave it unassailed. It is the imperfect
love which subtly invites the siege, which makes the
call upon human interest, selfishness, or sympathy,
so often without intended unscrupulousness at first.
She had escaped the suspicion, if not the censure,
of the world or so she thought; and in the
main she was right. But she was now embarked
on an enterprise which never would have been begun,
if she had not gambled with her heart and soul three
years ago; if she had not dragged away the veil from
her inner self, putting her at the mercy of one who
could say, “I know you what you are.”
Just before they went to the dining-room
Byng came in and cheerily greeted Stafford, apologizing
for having forgotten his engagement to dine with Wallstein.
“But you and Jasmine will have
much to talk about,” he said “such
old friends as you are; and fond of books and art
and music and all that kind of thing.... Glad
to see you looking so well, Stafford,” he continued.
“They say you are the coming man. Well,
au revoir. I hope Jasmine will give you
a good dinner.” Presently he was gone in
a heavy movement of good-nature and magnanimity.
“Changed greatly
changed, and not for the better,” said Ian Stafford
to himself. “This life has told on him.
The bronze of the veld has vanished, and other things
are disappearing.”
At the table with the lights and the
flowers and the exquisite appointments, with appetite
flattered and tempted by a dinner of rare simplicity
and perfect cooking, Jasmine was radiant, amusing,
and stimulating in her old way. She had never
seemed to him so much a mistress of delicate satire
and allusiveness. He rose to the combat with
an alacrity made more agile by considerable abstinence,
for clever women were few, and real talk was the rarest
occurrence in his life, save with men in his own profession
chiefly.
But later, in her sitting-room, after
the coffee had come, there was a change, and the transition
was made with much skill and sensitiveness. Into
Jasmine’s voice there came another and more reflective
note, and the drift of the conversation changed.
Books brought the new current; and soon she had him
moving almost unconsciously among old scenes, recalling
old contests of ideas, and venturing on bold reproductions
of past intellectual ideals. But though they
were in this dangerous field of the past, he did not
once betray a sign of feeling, not even when, poring
over Coventry Patmore’s poems, her hand touched
his, and she read the lines which they had read together
so long ago, with no thought of any significance to
themselves:
“With all my will, but much against
my heart,
We two now part.
My very Dear,
Our solace is the sad road lies so clear...
Go thou to East, I West.
We will not say
There’s any hope, it is so far away...”
He read the verses with a smile of
quiet enjoyment, saying, when he had finished:
“A really moving and intimate
piece of work. I wonder what their story was a
hopeless love, of course. An affaire an
’episode’ London ladies now
call such things.”
“You find London has changed
much since you went away in three years
only?” she asked.
“Three years why,
it’s an eternity, or a minute, as you are obliged
to live it. In penal servitude it is centuries,
in the Appian Way of pleasure it is a sunrise moment.
Actual time has nothing to do with the clock.”
She looked up to the little gold-lacquered
clock on the mantel-piece. “See, it is
going to strike,” she said. As she spoke,
the little silver hammer softly struck. “That
is the clock-time, but what time is it really for
you, for instance?”
“In Elysium there is no time,”
he murmured with a gallantry so intentionally obvious
and artificial that her pulses beat with anger.
“It is wonderful, then, how
you managed the dinner-hour so exactly. You did
not miss it by a fraction.”
“It is only when you enter Elysium
that there is no time. It was eight o’clock
when I arrived by the world’s time.
Since then I have been dead to time and
the world.”
“You do not suggest that you
are in heaven?” she asked, ironically.
“Nothing so extreme as that. All extremes
are violent.”
“Ah, the middle place then you are
in purgatory?”
“But what should you be doing
in purgatory? Or have you only come with a drop
of water to cool the tongue of Dives?” His voice
trailed along so coolly that it incensed her further.
“Certainly Dives’ tongue
is blistering,” she said with great effort to
still the raging tumult within her. “Yet
I would not cool it if I could.”
Suddenly the anger seemed to die out
of her, and she looked at him as she did in the days
before Rudyard Byng came across her path eagerly,
childishly, eloquently, inquiringly. He was the
one man who satisfied the intellectual and temperamental
side of her; and he had taught her more than any one
else in the world. She realized that she had “Tossed
him violently like a ball into a far country,”
and that she had not now a vestige of power over him either
of his senses or his mind; that he was master of the
situation. But was it so that there was a man
whose senses could not be touched when all else failed?
She was very woman, eager for the power which she
had lost, and power was hard to get by
what devious ways had she travelled to find it!
As they leaned over a book of coloured
prints of Gainsborough, Romney, and Vandyke, her soft,
warm breast touched his arm and shoulder, a strand
of her cobweb, golden hair swept his cheek, and a sigh
came from her lips, so like those of that lass who
caught and held her Nelson to the end, and died at
last in poverty, friendless, homeless, and alone.
Did he fancy that he heard a word breathing through
her sigh his name, Ian? For one instant
the wild, cynical desire came over him to turn and
clasp her in his arms, to press those lips which never
but once he had kissed, and that was when she had
plighted her secret troth to him, and had broken it
for three million pounds. Why not? She was
a woman, she was beautiful, she was a siren who had
lured him and used him and tossed him by. Why
not? All her art was now used, the art of the
born coquette which had been exquisitely cultivated
since she was a child, to bring him back to her feet to
the feet of the wife of Rudyard Byng. Why not?
For an instant he had the dark impulse to treat her
as she deserved, and take a kiss “as long as
my exile, as sweet as my revenge”; but then
the bitter memory came that this was the woman to
whom he had given the best of which he was capable
and the promise of that other best which time and
love and life truly lived might accomplish; and the
wild thing died in him.
The fever fled, and his senses became
as cold as the statue of Andromeda on the pedestal
at his hand. He looked at her. He did not
for the moment realize that she was in reality only
a girl, a child in so much; wilful, capricious, unregulated
in some ways, with the hereditary taint of a distorted
moral sense, and yet able, intuitive and wise, in
so many aspects of life and conversation. Looking,
he determined that she should never have that absolution
which any outward or inward renewal of devotion would
give her. Scorn was too deep that arrogant,
cruel, adventitious attribute of the sinner who has
not committed the same sin as the person he despises
“Sweet is the refuge of scorn.”
His scorn was too sweet; and for the
relish of it on his tongue, the price must be paid
one way or another. The sin of broken faith she
had sinned had been the fruit of a great temptation,
meaning more to a woman, a hundred times, than to
a man. For a man there is always present the
chance of winning a vast fortune and the power that
it brings; but it can seldom come to a woman except
through marriage. It ill became him to be self-righteous,
for his life had not been impeccable
“The shaft of slander shot
Missed only the right blot!”
Something of this came to him suddenly
now as she drew away from him with a sense of humiliation,
and a tear came unbidden to her eye.
She wiped the tear away, hastily,
as there came a slight tapping at the door, and Krool
entered, his glance enveloping them both in one lightning
survey like the instinct of the dweller
in wild places of the earth, who feels danger where
all is most quiet, and ever scans the veld or bush
with the involuntary vigilance belonging to the life.
His look rested on Jasmine for a moment before he
spoke, and Stafford inwardly observed that here was
an enemy to the young wife whose hatred was deep.
He was conscious, too, that Jasmine realized the antipathy.
Indeed, she had done so from the first days she had
seen Krool, and had endeavoured, without success,
to induce Byng to send the man back to South Africa,
and to leave him there last year when he went again
to Johannesburg. It was the only thing in which
Byng had proved invulnerable, and Krool had remained
a menace which she vaguely felt and tried to conquer,
which, in vain, Adrian Fellowes had endeavoured to
remove. For in the years in which Fellowes had
been Byng’s secretary his relations with Krool
seemed amiable and he had made light of Jasmine’s
prejudices.
“The butler is out and they
come me,” Krool said. “Mr. Stafford’s
servant is here. There is a girl for to see him,
if he will let. The boy, Jigger, his name.
Something happens.”
Stafford frowned, then turned to Jasmine.
He told her who Jigger was, and of the incident the
day before, adding that he had no idea of the reason
for the visit; but it must be important, or nothing
would have induced his servant to fetch the girl.
“I will come,” he said
to Krool, but Jasmine’s curiosity was roused.
“Won’t you see her here?” she asked.
Stafford nodded assent, and presently
Krool showed the girl into the room.
For an instant she stood embarrassed
and confused, then she addressed herself to Stafford.
“I’m Lou Jigger’s sister,”
she said, with white lips. “I come to ask
if you’d go to him. ’E’s been
hurt bad knocked down by a fire-engine,
and the doctor says ’e can’t live.
’E made yer a promise, and ’e wanted me
to tell yer that ’e meant to keep it; but if
so be as you’d come, and wouldn’t mind
a-comin’, ’e’d tell yer himself.
’E made that free becos ’e had brekfis
wiv ye. ’E’s all right the
best as ever the top best.”
Suddenly the tears flooded her eyes and streamed
down her pale cheeks. “Oh, ’e was
the best my Gawd, ’e was the best!
If it ’d make ’im die happy, you’d
come, y’r gryce, wouldn’t y’r?”
Child of the slums as she was, she
was exceedingly comely and was simply and respectably
dressed. Her eyes were big and brown like Stafford’s;
her face was a delicate oval, and her hair was a deep
black, waving freely over a strong, broad forehead.
It was her speech that betrayed her; otherwise she
was little like the flower-girl that Adrian Fellowes
had introduced to Al’mah, who had got her a place
in the chorus of the opera and had also given her
personal care and friendly help.
“Where is he? In the hospital?” Stafford
asked.
“It was just beside our own
’ome it ’appened. We got two rooms
now, Jigger and me. ’E was took in there.
The doctor come, but ’e says it ain’t
no use. ’E didn’t seem to care much,
and ’e didn’t give no ’ope, not
even when I said I’d give him all me wages for
a year.”
Jasmine was beside her now, wiping
her tears and holding her hand, her impulsive nature
stirred, her heart throbbing with desire to help.
Suddenly she remembered what Rudyard had said up-stairs
three hours ago, that there wasn’t a single
person in the world to whom they had done an act which
was truly and purely personal during the past three
years: and she had a tremulous desire to help
this crude, mothering, passionately pitiful girl.
“What will you do?” Jasmine said to Stafford.
“I will go at once. Tell
my servant to have up a cab,” he said to Krool,
who stood outside the door.
“Truly, ’e will be glad,”
the girl exclaimed. “’E told me about the
suvring, and Sunday-week for brekfis,” she murmured.
“You’ll never miss the time, y’r
gryce. Gawd knows you’ll not miss it an’
’e ain’t got much left.”
“I will go, too if
you will let me,” said Jasmine to Stafford.
“You must let me go. I want to help so
much.”
“No, you must not come,”
he replied. “I will pick up a surgeon in
Harley Street, and we’ll see if it is as hopeless
as she says. But you must not come to-night.
To-morrow, certainly, to-morrow, if you will.
Perhaps you can do some good then. I will let
you know.”
He held out his hand to say good-bye,
as the girl passed out with Jasmine’s kiss on
her cheek and a comforting assurance of help.
Jasmine did not press her request.
First there was the fact that Rudyard did not know,
and might strongly disapprove; and secondly, somehow,
she had got nearer to Stafford in the last few minutes
than in all the previous hours since they had met
again. Nowhere, by all her art, had she herself
touched him, or opened up in his nature one tiny stream
of feeling; but this girl’s story and this piteous
incident had softened him, had broken down the barriers
which had checked and baffled her. There was
something almost gentle in his smile as he said good-bye,
and she thought she detected warmth in the clasp of
his hand.
Left alone, she sat in the silence,
pondering as she had not pondered in the past three
years. These few days in town, out of the season,
were sandwiched between social functions from which
their lives were never free. They had ever passed
from event to event like minor royalties with endless
little ceremonies and hospitalities; and there had
been so little time to meditate had there
even been the wish?
The house was very still, and the
far-off, muffled rumble of omnibuses and cabs gave
a background of dignity to this interior peace and
luxurious quiet. For long she sat unmoving nearly
two hours alone with her inmost thoughts.
Then she went to the little piano in the corner where
stood the statue of Andromeda, and began to play softly.
Her fingers crept over the keys, playing snatches of
things she knew years before, improvising soft, passionate
little movements. She took no note of time.
At last the clock struck twelve, and still she sat
there playing. Then she began to sing a song which
Alice Tynemouth had written and set to music two years
before. It was simply yet passionately written,
and the wail of anguished disappointment, of wasted
chances was in it
“Once in the twilight of the Austrian
hills,
A word came to me, beautiful and good;
If I had spoken it, that message of the
stars,
Love would have filled thy blood:
Love would have sent thee pulsing to my
arms,
Thy heart a nestling bird;
A moment fled it passed:
I seek in vain
For that forgotten word.”
In the last notes the voice rose in
passionate pain, and died away into an aching silence.
She leaned her arms on the piano in
front of her and laid her forehead on them.
“When will it all end what
will become of me!” she cried in pain that strangled
her heart. “I am so bad so bad.
I was doomed from the beginning. I always felt
it so always, even when things were brightest.
I am the child of black Destiny. For me there
is nothing, nothing, for me. The straight path
was before me, and I would not walk in it.”
With a gesture of despair, and a sudden
faintness, she got up and went over to the tray of
spirits and liqueurs which had been brought in
with the coffee. Pouring out a liqueur-glass
of brandy, she was about to drink it, when her ear
became attracted by a noise without, a curious stumbling,
shuffling sound. She put down the glass, went
to the door that opened into the hall, and looked
out and down. One light was still burning below,
and she could see distinctly. A man was clumsily,
heavily, ascending the staircase, holding on to the
balustrade. He was singing to himself, breaking
into the maudlin harmony with an occasional laugh
“For this is the way we do it on
the veld,
When the band begins to play;
With one bottle on the table and one below
the belt,
When the band begins to play ”
It was Rudyard, and he was drunk almost
helplessly drunk.
A cry of pain rose to her lips, but
her trembling hand stopped it. With a shudder
she turned back to her sitting-room. Throwing
herself on the divan where she had sat with Ian Stafford,
she buried her face in her arms. The hours went
by.