How it sounded like an Epitaph, but
still she would not cry; how she thinks of the
Beach again, and hugs a Hateful Word to her Bosom;
and Hugo starts suddenly on a sort of Wedding-Trip.
In her own room Carlisle was seized
with a wild desire to cry. Her spirit, shocked
past bearing, demanded this instant relief. But
she fought down the loosening impulses within her,
knowing their worse than uselessness; she had shed
her heart’s tears for this before now. And
her need now was for strength; strength to meet her
mother when need be, against whom key nor bolt brought
privacy: strength, above all, to wipe out this
mark set upon her forehead....
She resisted the impulse to fling
herself face downward upon the bed, which would have
been fatal; kept stoutly upon her feet. And presently,
summoning all her courage, she stood at the window
and peeped, pale-faced, between the curtains.
All was well down there now. The old avenger
was gone. There were only people passing serenely
over the familiar sidewalk, and the sunlight dying
where she had stood and learned just now that a lie
has a long life.
Yes, the Colonel was gone: and
with him, so it seemed, all veils and draperies, all
misty sublimations. One doesn’t idealize
one’s self too much, with curses ringing in
one’s ears.
Cally leaned weakly against the wall,
both gloved palms pressed into the cold smoothness
of her cheeks. Somewhere in the still house a
door suddenly banged shut, and she just repressed
a scream....
Old Colonel Dalhousie did not deal
in moral subtleties, that was clear. Regret,
penitence, sufferings, tears, or dreamy aspiration:
he did not stay to split such hairs as these.
His eye was for the large, the stark effect.
And by the intense singleness of his vision, he had
freighted his opinions with an extraordinary conviction.
He had shouted down, as from a high bench, the world’s
judgment on the life of Cally Heth.
Twenty-four years and over she had
lived in this town; and at the end to be called a
she-devil and a hell-cat.
The girl’s bosom heaved.
She became intensely busy in the bedroom, by dint
of some determination; taking off her street things
and putting them painstakingly away, straightening
objects here or there which did very well as they
were. Flora knocked, and was sent away. On
the mantel was discovered a square lavender box, bearing
a blazoned name well known in another city. Fresh
flowers from Canning, these were; and Carlisle, removing
the purple tinsel from the bound stems, carefully disposed
the blossoms in a bowl of water. Once in her
goings and comings, she encountered her reflection
in the mirror, and then she quickly averted her eyes.
One glance of recognition between herself and that
poor frightened little thing, and down would come
the flood-gates, with profitless explanations to follow
in a certain quarter. She avoided that catastrophe;
but not so easily did she elude the echoing words of
her neighbor the Colonel, which were like to take
on the inflection of an epitaph....
After a time, when the dread of weeping
had waned, Cally threw herself down in her chaise-longue
near the window, and covered her eyes with her hand.
And now with all her will-and she had never
lacked for will-she strove to take her
mind from what no piety or wit could now amend:
struggling to think and remember how she had tried
once, at a price, to set right that wrong she had
done. For other comfort there was none:
what she had written, she had written. She might
give her life to the ways of Dorcas; she might beat
her breast and fill her hands with pluckings of her
gay hair. But she could not bring Dalhousie back
to life now, or face his poor father as a girl who
had done no wrong....
Life in the House moved on. There
was a caller or two, who found the ladies excused;
there was a telephone summons from Miss Evelyn McVey,
whose desire it was to entertain Mr. Canning at dinner,
but who now met only with a maid’s message;
and then, toward seven, there came mamma herself,
who was, of course, not so lightly to be disposed of.
But Cally had fortified herself for
the little visit, and passed the inspection without
mishap. Mrs. Heth was acquiescent enough in her
daughter’s desire to dine upstairs, which saved
the bother of hunting up another man in Hugo’s
stead, though involving regrettable waste of two covers
already prepared. Mamma lingered for fifteen minutes
making arch, tactful inquiries about the afternoon;
but she noticed nothing more than was accountable
for by the slight headache to which Carlisle frankly
admitted. The little general’s side remarks
conceded no doubt whatever that Hugo would present
himself very shortly indeed after dinner, for resumption
of the agreeable matter in hand. They should have
the library to themselves, she promised, company or
no company....
Cally dined at a reading-table, set
by the fire. Later, when the tray was gone and
she was alone again, she relapsed into thoughts which
had gained unwonted lucidity and vigor.
She had been thinking of the night,
a year ago this month, to which everything in her
life since seemed to run straight back. She had
not certainly calculated the ruin of Dalhousie that
night: rather her lack was that she had hardly
cared what she did to him. In that narrow circle
of engrossments where she had moved, mistaking it for
the living universe, the great want, so it seemed
now, was that she had never been asked to measure
herself by moral standards at all. What she got:
this was all that people looked at here, and according
to this she had well managed her affairs, snug in
the snugness of the horse-leech’s daughters.
She had been all for the walled little island,-as
she had heard it called,-the island of
the upward bound, where self-propelment was the test
of right or wrong, and a marriage well above her the
touchstone of a girl’s sound morality. On
this island such as Jack Dalhousie had no merit.
What simpler than to kick him off, and turn away with
your fingers in your ears?...
Improbable people these, no doubt,
if you were of those who judged people by what they
did, and never by what they had; hell-cats, perhaps,
if you happened to be a father thus made sonless....
Her abasement now fairly met the portrait
of her sketched by a stranger two hours since; outran
what another stranger had said to her, one night in
a summer-house. She looked back over a year, and
seemed to see herself as truly one empty within, a
poor little thing; common in her whole outlook, vulgar
in her soul.... Yes, vulgar. Let her
hug the hateful word to her bosom. How else could
she have been made to feel so again and again, by
an obscure youth who had no power over anybody but
that he had kept his own face turned toward the stars?...
And when Cally’s thoughts turned
toward this present, struggling to show beyond doubt
that that girl and this were not one, they ran perpetually
into that new cloud of her own weakness which had unrolled
above her to-day, and now spread and blackened over
the skies.
And yet she felt that it was not cowardice
that tied her hands against the fainting girls in
the bunching-room. Her strung nerves had carried
it all deeper than that. She had spied on her
father, found him out in guilt; he, it seemed, must
for years have been leading a double life that would
not bear looking at. How bring herself to confront
papa, who had always been so affectionate and generous
to her, with his discovered secret?...
If she but had some right, even, some
standing from which to speak.... And here her
new resolve was that when she saw Dr. Vivian at the
Settlement next week, she would consult him directly:
now asking him to say, not that she had no responsibilities
about her father’s business, but that she had
them in abundance.
But deeper than this, beneath all
the flutterings of her mind, there ran the increasing
sense that, whatever the logic of it might be, responsibility
was on her nevertheless: the supreme responsibility
put upon free beings by the trust of a friend....
Hugo, it was presumable, would be
detained with his Mr. Deming until the latter’s
departure, or near it. He could hardly appear
before nine o’clock, or even nine-thirty; and
perhaps he might not come at all. Cally had felt
unable to agree with her mother’s theory that
she was required to sit awaiting Hugo’s convenience
there. At all events, she had early resolved
to settle the point by definitely “retiring”
before his possible arrival; relying upon a worse
aching head to justify her with mamma, who was not
of the few to be favored with fuller confidences.
But a little after eight, when this
resolve was almost ready to shape into the deed, the
sensible reasoning on which it was based was suddenly
upset. The maid Flora came, bringing a new message
from the preoccupied lover, brief but decisive.
The business entanglements, it appeared,
had only got worse with talking. Hugo, beyond
all expectation, found himself compelled to go back
to Washington with his law-partner to-night; possibly
to go on to New York to-morrow. Would Carlisle
accordingly arrange to see him now, for a few moments?
“Now?”
“Yas’m, he say as soon as you c’d
make it convenient.”
The girl had risen sharply in the
first complete surprise of Flora’s message;
she walked hastily across her floor. But having
done these things, she did not at once give the obviously
due reply. She stood by her dressing-table, staring
fixedly at the colored woman, the aimless fingers
of her left hand continually pulling out and putting
back the silver top of a squat cut-glass bottle.
She appeared to be thinking, weighing pros and cons:
processes surely unnecessary to a pasteboard actor,
sliding smoothly toward a manifest destiny.
She stood this way so long and so
silent that Flora prompted with a giggle and further
information.
“Miss Cyahlile, he say if you
was to answer no, to say could he please speak to
you a minute on the ’phone.”
Upon that Miss Carlisle was seen to
replace the bottle stopper with consciousness of movement,
and to turn her slate-blue eyes briefly toward the
ceiling, with no movement of her head at all.
“Very well ... Say that
I’ll see him at half-past eight, for a few minutes.”
Flora, naturally, was not a woman
without understanding the sign language of her sex.
It might be that she had learned the color of the
Canning money-and she had-but
her dusky heart, like yours or mine, was not for sale.
“Yas’m-certny
... Yas’m. Or, Miss Cyahlile-I
moût just say we ’re mighty sorry-but
not knowin’ he was expected, and you feelin’
po’ly an’ all-you just this
minute went to baid-an’-”
“No!-do as I say,”
said the young mistress, quite sharply. But, as
her faithful friend turned away, she added in another
voice: “You’re a good girl, Flora....
Be sure to say just for a few minutes.”
After the solitude and meditation came action at speed.
The maid vanished, the mistress slipped
off her flowered negligee and drew hot water in the
bathroom. She proceeded, with no want of experience
or skill, to make herself beautiful for her lover:
the lover who had seemed over a gulf from her this
afternoon, and now what worlds away.... And if
the rites were done somewhat hurriedly perforce, there
was no lack of conscientiousness here. She, who
had said that she had never paid her way through life,
could only pay in what coin she had....
Events moved quickly. Flora,
who was “on the doorbell” to-night because
of the dinner-party, was soon back to say that Mr.
Canning was in the library. She was sent ahead
to make sure that the coast was clear.
Cally, in a soft black house-dress
with an apricot waist-ribbon, went down the back-stairs.
She passed through the busy pantry, where Moses and
Annie were just ready for an expert entrance with the
fish; went through the back hall, where Flora stood
flashing her teeth beside the closed door of the dining-room;
came to the side door of the library. This door
Cally opened, and shut it again behind her....
It was a massive and dark-beamed room,
softened now with the light of lamps and fire.
Hugo stood in the middle of it, turning quickly at
the sound of the door. He, whose afternoon had
taken a course so different from his planning, still
wore the clothes he had had on then, a dark gray walking-suit
which well became his fine-figured masculinity.
Over his brow there hovered a vexed business frown,
nor did this altogether vanish as he advanced upon
Carlisle, a lover’s welcome springing imperiously
into his eyes.
“Isn’t this the devil’s
own luck?... Deming insists it all depends on
me.”
“You go at nine-thirty?”
“He says he’ll manacle
me if necessary. It’s confoundedly important,
you see-there are large interests involved.
You know I wouldn’t go otherwise. Don’t
you?”
“And to-morrow you go on to New York?”
“No!-There’s
only the remotest chance. I’ll go bail to
be back here to-morrow at five o’clock.”
“Oh!... I-the message I got-”
“I put that in only to make
absolutely sure of getting you.... Growing cunning,
you see.”
“Oh-I didn’t
understand,” said Cally, colorlessly, continuing
to look down at her pink fingernails.
She seemed to think of nothing further
to say, but that appeared to make no great difference.
Hugo moved nearer. If he had remembered his thought
about her being too sure of him, it may be that the
sight of her had rushed his senses, as it had often
done before.
“You were so unlike your natural
dear self this afternoon,” he said, on the wooing
note; and suddenly he had possessed himself of both
her hands. “To-night-and we’ve
only such a little time-you are going to
make it all up to me ... Aren’t you?”
Finding herself captured, the girl
hastily raised eyes dark with trouble, looking at
her lover for the first time. And so looking,
she took her hands from his grasp with a hastiness
which might have been a little rasping to a morbidly
sensitive man.
“Don’t!-please
don’t! I-don’t like to
be touched.... I-I can only act as
I feel, Hugo.”
She turned away hurriedly, passed
him and went over to the fireplace. There she
stood quite silent before the dull red glow, locking
and unlocking her slim fingers, and within her a spreading
coldness.
Behind her she heard the thundering feet.
“I hoped, you see,” said
Hugo’s voice, disappointed, but hardly chagrined,
“that you would be feeling a little more-well,
like your own natural self, after your rest ...
Particularly as all our plans for these two days have
been so upset.”
She replied, after a pause, in a noticeably
constrained voice: “I haven’t said
that I don’t feel my natural self. That’s
only your-your interpretation of what you
don’t like.... I-that seems to
be just the trouble between us.”
“Now, now!-my dear
Cally!” said Hugo, soothing, if somewhat wearied
to see still another conversation drifting toward the
argumentative. “There’s no trouble
between us at all. I, for one, have put our little
disagreement to-day out of my head entirely. I
do feel that there’s not much happiness in these
so-called modernisms, but don’t let’s spoil
our few minutes.... Why, Carlisle!” said
Hugo, in another voice. “Why, what’s
the matter?”
She had astonished him by suddenly
laying her arm upon the mantel, and burying her face
in the curve of it. So close Canning stood now
that he could have taken her in his arms without moving;
but some quality in her pose discouraged the idea
that she might desire comfort that way.
Carlisle’s difficulties, indeed,
were by no means over for the day. The conviction
which had come upon her with the first full view of
her lover’s face-where Colonel Dalhousie
seemed also to have set his afflicting mark-had
suddenly grown overwhelming. She had made her
draft for payment against an account where there were
no more funds.
“Are you ill?”
“No,” she answered, straightening
at once.... “I ... I’m afraid-this
is my natural self.”
“Something troubles you?” said Hugo, with
penetration.
She nodded, and turned away.
She had always been capable of independent
action; it was her chief strength, however mamma might
speak of flare-ups. But never in her womanhood
had she felt less in tune for heroics and a scene.
Life was shaking to pieces all around her.
“Hugo,” she began, with
difficulty, playing at arranging a slide of books
on the table with hands like two blocks of ice ...
“I-I hesitated about coming down
at all, but now-I think ... As you
are going away to-night, and would be coming back
to-morrow entirely on my account ... I think
I ought-”
“Why, my dear! What’s
all this about?... Do you mean you’ve let
your feelings be hurt by my going off? Why, you-”
“It isn’t that.”
The nature of his understanding seemed
to stir something in her, and she went on in a rather
steadier voice:
“I’ve been thinking of
something you said to me once-that I wasn’t
the girl you had asked to marry you ... It’s
taken me a long time, but I’ve learned that
that was the truth. I’m not-”
She was checked, to her surprise, by a soft laugh.
“So that’s been it!...
I never imagined-no wonder!... Why,
Cally! How could you suppose I meant it?
Don’t you know I was angry that day?-off
my head? Would I-”
“But it’s true! I’m
not that girl at all-I feel differently-I-”
“Well! Let’s not
waste good time in mare’s nests of that
sort. Why, dear little girl, would I be here
now, if I wasn’t satisfied as no other man on
earth-”
“But I’m not satisfied, Hugo.”
Cally turned now, faced him fully,
a faint color coming into her cheek. In the man’s
handsome eyes she had surprised an unmistakable complacence.
“I’m not satisfied,”
she said, hurriedly, “to know that we are miles
apart, and drifting further every minute. Don’t
you see there’s no sympathy-no understanding-between
us? What interests me, appeals to me, what is
really my natural self-that only annoys
you, makes you think-”
“I’ve been at fault there,
I own,” he interrupted, soothingly, nodding
his head respectfully up and down. “To tell
the truth, I’ve been so immensely interested
in you,-in Carlisle the woman,-that
I haven’t seemed able to make proper allowance
for your-your other interests. I promise
to turn over a new leaf there. And, on your side,
I am sure, you do realize, Carlisle-”
“Hugo,” said the girl,
desperately, “you don’t understand me.
I am trying to say that I can’t marry you.
I cannot.”
Then the faint hum of voices from
the dining-room down the hall became quite audible
in the library. By the ebbing of color from Hugo’s
virile face, Cally knew that she had penetrated his
satisfaction at last; but by the look in his eyes
she learned that she had lodged no conviction in him.
“I hesitated when you asked
me in September,” said she, slowly, and trying
her best to make her voice sound firm. “I
should have made up my mind sooner-I’ve
been to blame. I’m sorry to-”
He said in a slightly hoarsened voice:
“What has happened since I left you this afternoon?”
What, indeed? Everything seemed to have happened.
“Something did happen ...
But I-I don’t think there’s
any use to talk about it.”
“Tell me what has happened. I have a right
to know.”
“I will, if you wish-but
it won’t do any good.... I went out, to
my cousins’. And at the door, as I came
back, I-I met Colonel Dalhousie. He
stopped me ... expressed his opinion of me. He
said things that I-I-”
She stopped precipitately, with a
break in her voice; turned from him.
“Oh!-I understand ... Poor little
girl.”
At the mention of the name of ill
omen, Canning’s strong heart had missed a beat.
He had thought the old corpse buried past exhumation;
the sudden rising of the ghost to walk had staggered
for an instant even his superb incredulities.
But with that sudden tremulousness of hers, he was
himself again, or almost, with a new light upon her
whole strange and unreliable demeanor. Small
wonder, after such an encounter, if she was brought
to the verge of hysteria, her feminine reason unseated,
her mind wandering mistily over the forgotten past....
He tried to take at least one hand
in loving sympathy, but found that the matter could
not be arranged.
“The shock has upset you-poor
darling! I understand. No wonder!...”
“No-I’m not
upset ... I-Hugo, I can’t marry
you. I’m truly sorry-I’ve
tried-but now I’m quite sure-”
“But this is madness,”
said Hugo’s queer voice. “Don’t
you see it is as you say the words?... Not marry
me-because an old ruffian waylaid you,
called you-hard names-”
“No, but because what he said
was true. No-of course that’s
not the reason ... I must tell you the truth
...”
Cally lifted misty eyes, beneath which
faint circles were beginning to appear, and said with
sadness:
“Hugo, I don’t love you.”
Then she watched, painfully, the last
remnants of his assurance drop away from his face:
and after that, she saw, with a certain fear, that
she had still to make herself believed.
Hugo, supported not merely by his
own justifiable confidences but by her mother’s
affirmations, could, indeed, put no credence in his
ears. Many explanations were possible for this
extraordinary feminine perversity; she had happened
to mention the one explanation that was not possible.
“You don’t know what you’re
saying,” he began, huskily, out of the silence.
“You’re not yourself at all nowadays ...
Full of new little ideas. You’ve taken
a whim, because an old rascal ... whom I shall punish
as he deserves-”
“No ... That helped me
to make up my mind, perhaps. But I’ve learned
I’ve never loved you-since you left
me last year.”
Cally moved away from Hugo, not caring
to witness the breaking-up of his self-control.
She leaned against the heavy mahogany table, clenching
a tiny handkerchief between chill little hands.
If the months had brought her perfect vengeance on
the man who had once failed her in her need, she was
finding it, indeed, a joyless victory.
“I’m to blame for not
telling you before-when you were here last
month,” she said, with some agitation ...
“Only I really didn’t know my own mind
... All summer I seemed to ... just to take it
for granted that-everything was the same-that
I still cared for you. But-Hugo, I
don’t. I’m sorrier than I can say
for what has been my fault....”
The young man had been standing like
one in a trancelike illness, who can hear, indeed,
with horrible distinctness, but can neither move nor
speak. But now the increasing finality of her
words seemed all at once to galvanize him; he shook
himself slightly and took one heavy step forward.
“What you need is a protector,
little girl-a man. I know about the
summer-I suffered, too.... Of course.
And in the loneliness-you’ve let
yourself be affected.... The unrest of the day-”
“No, no! Please,”
said she, almost ready to scream-“don’t
think this is one of my new little ideas you speak
of. I-it’s true that we don’t
seem to think alike about things.... But I’d
never have noticed that at all if I loved you.
I’d want to think and do only as you wished.
But I don’t-”
“I’ve spoiled you ...
letting you think you could have your way with me,”
said Hugo, in his thick and gritty voice. “You’re
mad to-night, little girl ... aren’t responsible
for what you say....”
Flicked in her spirit, she broke across
his argument with a changed voice and gaze.
“Why is it madness not to love you?”
“It’s not a thing to argue
about now, I say. You do love me ... I know
it. You’ll marry me next month, that I swear.
Why-”
“No!-when I love,
I want to look up, and when I marry, I’ll marry
above me....”
That checked his queer truculence;
and Cally, desperate with the need to drive home her
meaning, swept on with no more nervousness.
“And-don’t
you see?-I’ve not been able to look
up to you since that day last year.... The day-I’m
sorry to have to say it-when you came all
the way down from New York to show me that you didn’t
care for a woman who was getting new little ideas
about telling the truth....”
Canning’s face was the color
of chalk, his look increasingly stony; in his eyes
strange passions mounted. Now he seemed, to intend
to say something, but the girl’s words flowed
with gathering intensity.
“Why, think what you did that
day, Hugo!-think, think! If I needed
a protector and a man,-and I did,-that
was the time for you to show me how protectors and
men can act and love. If I was wrong, it seems
to me that was the time of all times when you ought
to have stood by me, protected me. But I was
right-don’t you know I was?...
I-it was the first time I had ever thought
about doing right-and you threw me over
for it.... Of course I know there was a quarrel,
but-you know perfectly well what you said.
You said then, just as you say now, that I was shocked
out of my senses, didn’t know what I was saying.
And then you said that people would point at me to
the longest day I lived, so the thing to do was to
hush it all up, or else I wasn’t the girl you
had asked to be your wife. Anything-anything-except
that I should tell the truth.... So you went
off and left me to bear it all alone. And then,
when my heart had been broken into little pieces, when
I’d cried my eyes out a hundred times, then,
when all the trouble was over, and people weren’t
cutting me on the street,-then you came
back. And even then you never said once that
you were ashamed, or sorry for the way you’d
treated me. You just came back, when I’d
fought it all out without you, and whistled, and thought
that I’d tumble into your arms.... Oh, it’s
natural, I suppose, for a woman to lie and be mean,
and afraid of what people will say-for
that seems to be the-the way they’re
brought up.... But-but-”
Her voice, which had begun to trail
a little, dropped off into silence. She turned
away; made a visible effort to control herself.
And then there floated again into the still room the
sounds of muffled revelry: strong Mrs. Heth making
merry with her friends, a few of the best people....
“But I only hurt your feelings
for nothing,” said the girl, in quite a gentle
voice.... “Hugo, try to forgive me if I’ve
done you any wrong. But ... you-you
have your train to make. Don’t you think
you’d better go now?”
Hugo’s extraordinary reply was to seize her
in his arms.
“Go?... Yes, and take you
with me ... you little witch. Why, you’re
raving, little witch,” said the hoarse, violent
voice in her ear. “Gone out of your head
with notions.... D’you think I’ll
let your life and mine be spoiled for a few minutes’
crazy madness? You need to remember you’re
a woman, that’s all.... Don’t struggle.
It’s no use.”
Her wild efforts to release herself,
indeed, only drew his embrace tighter. His cheek
rested upon her hair.
“Don’t struggle, little
witch. You’ve had your head too long.
I’ll make up your mind for you. You’re
going to marry me now. To-night. Don’t
tire yourself so. It’s all settled.
You belong to me-you see that now, don’t
you?...”
Now his hand was beneath her chin;
he raised the still face she had kept so resolutely
buried against his breast. And Cally felt his
burning kiss upon her forehead, her cheek, upon lips
that would nevermore be his.
“Little temptress ... you were
so anxious for me to love you last year.... Doesn’t
this teach you that I’ll never give you up?
It’s all settled now. We’ll be married
at once. I’ll hold you this way-kiss
you this way-till you learn to do what
I say. Then you’ll go up and put on travelling-clothes.
Never mind lug....”
His wedding-trip ended in the middle
of a word. His clasp had been weakened by that
hand he had raised, and with the sudden strength of
desperation his bride had broken from him. In
an instant she had put the table between them.
Over ten feet of lamplit space, the
lovers of yesteryear regarded each other. Both
were white, both trembling. The girl now suffered
a brief collapse; her face dropped into her upraised
hands, through which, presently, her voice came brokenly:
“Go!... Go, I beg you....”
Canning stood panting, shaken and
speechless. Upon him was the last measure of
defeat. He had staked his passion and his pride
in the supreme attack, and had been crushingly repulsed.
Doubt not that he read the incredible portents in
the heavens now. His face went from chalk to
leaden gray.
He drew his tongue once across his
lips, and said, just articulately:
“If I go-out of this
room-alone ... as God lives, you’ll
never see me again.”
It must have been something in Hugo’s
difficult voice, surely nothing in the words, that
set a chord to stirring in Cally. She took her
eyes from her hands, glanced once at his subtly distorted
face. And then she stood silent by the barrier
table, looking down, knotting and unknotting her yellow
sash-ends....
That other night of humiliation in
the library, which she had never been able to forget,
had risen swiftly on the wings of memory. But,
curiously, she felt no such uprush of shame now; her
fury mysteriously ebbed from her. Even in this
moment, still trembling from his familiar handling,
still with the frightening sense of her life going
to ruin about her, she felt a rising pity for her
prince of lovers whom time and circumstance had brought
to this....
“Perhaps,” said she, out
of the silence, in almost a natural tone, “I
ought to feel very-angry and-and
indignant.... But I don’t. I only
feel sad.... Hugo, why need there be any bitterness
between us? We’ve both made a mistake,
that’s all, and I feel it’s been my fault
from the beginning. If you seem to take me-rather-lightly....
I must have taught you to think of me that way....
And you’ll soon see how-how superficial
my attraction for you was, soon forget....”
Strangely, these mild words seemed
to affect Hugo more than anything done or said before.
In fact, he appeared unable to bear them. He had
checked her speech suddenly by lifting his hand, in
a vague way, to his head; and now, without a word,
he turned away, walking blindly toward the door.
She, in silence, followed his going
with dark eyes that looked half ready to weep.
By the door into the hall, through
which she had come a little while before, the broken
young man paused. His face was stony gray, touched
with livid streaks. Standing, he looked unseeingly
about the room, around and over her; then at last
at her. It had seemed to be his intention to
say something, to claim the woman’s privilege
of the last word. But now, when the moment arrived,
there came no words.
For once Hugo must be indifferent
to anti-climax, must fail to leave a lady’s
presence with an air. Standing and looking, he
suddenly flung out one arm in a wild, curious gesture;
and on that he opened the door, very quickly.
The door shut again, quietly enough.
And that was all. The beginning at the Beach
had touched an end indeed. Hugo was gone.
His feet would thunder this way no more.
But the latter end of these things
was not yet. One doesn’t, of course, kick
out of one’s groove for nothing.
Cally, returning after a time to her
own room, did not go at once to bed, much as she would
have liked to do that. She sat up, fully dressed,
by a dying fire, waiting for what must come. She
waited till quarter to eleven, so long did the dinner-guests
linger downstairs. But it came at last, just
as she had known it would: on gliding heels, not
knocking, beaming just at first....
The interview lasted till hard upon
midnight. When it ended, both women were in tears.
Cally retired to a fitful rest. At nine o’clock
next morning, papa telephoned for Dr. Halstead, who
came and found temperature, and prescribed a pale-green
medicine, which was to be shaken well before using.
The positive command was that the patient should not
get out of bed that day.
And Cally did not get up that day,
or the next, or the next. She lay abed, pale
and uncommunicative, denying herself even to Mattie
Allen, but less easily shutting herself from the operations
of her mind.
And at night, when the troubled brain
slips all control, she dreamed continually of horrors.
Horrors in which neither Hugo nor mamma had part:
of giant machines crashing through floors upon screaming
girls, of great crowded buildings falling down with
frightful uproars and bedlam shrieks. Through
these phantasms the tall figure of Colonel Dalhousie
perpetually moved, smiling softly. But when Cally
met the doctor of the Dabney House in her dreams,
the trust was gone from his eyes.