In a firm, though cautious tone, Elinor thus began.
“I should be undeserving of
the confidence you have honoured me with, if I felt
no desire for its continuance, or no farther curiosity
on its subject. I will not apologize therefore
for bringing it forward again.”
“Thank you,” cried Lucy
warmly, “for breaking the ice; you have set my
heart at ease by it; for I was somehow or other afraid
I had offended you by what I told you that Monday.”
“Offended me! How could
you suppose so? Believe me,” and Elinor
spoke it with the truest sincerity, “nothing
could be farther from my intention than to give you
such an idea. Could you have a motive for the
trust, that was not honourable and flattering to me?”
“And yet I do assure you,”
replied Lucy, her little sharp eyes full of meaning,
“there seemed to me to be a coldness and displeasure
in your manner that made me quite uncomfortable.
I felt sure that you was angry with me; and have been
quarrelling with myself ever since, for having took
such a liberty as to trouble you with my affairs.
But I am very glad to find it was only my own fancy,
and that you really do not blame me. If you knew
what a consolation it was to me to relieve my heart
speaking to you of what I am always thinking of every
moment of my life, your compassion would make you
overlook every thing else I am sure.”
“Indeed, I can easily believe
that it was a very great relief to you, to acknowledge
your situation to me, and be assured that you shall
never have reason to repent it. Your case is a
very unfortunate one; you seem to me to be surrounded
with difficulties, and you will have need of all your
mutual affection to support you under them. Mr.
Ferrars, I believe, is entirely dependent on his mother.”
“He has only two thousand pounds
of his own; it would be madness to marry upon that,
though for my own part, I could give up every prospect
of more without a sigh. I have been always used
to a very small income, and could struggle with any
poverty for him; but I love him too well to be the
selfish means of robbing him, perhaps, of all that
his mother might give him if he married to please her.
We must wait, it may be for many years. With
almost every other man in the world, it would be an
alarming prospect; but Edward’s affection and
constancy nothing can deprive me of I know.”
“That conviction must be every
thing to you; and he is undoubtedly supported by the
same trust in your’s. If the strength of
your reciprocal attachment had failed, as between
many people, and under many circumstances it naturally
would during a four years’ engagement, your
situation would have been pitiable, indeed.”
Lucy here looked up; but Elinor was
careful in guarding her countenance from every expression
that could give her words a suspicious tendency.
“Edward’s love for me,”
said Lucy, “has been pretty well put to the
test, by our long, very long absence since we were
first engaged, and it has stood the trial so well,
that I should be unpardonable to doubt it now.
I can safely say that he has never gave me one moment’s
alarm on that account from the first.”
Elinor hardly knew whether to smile
or sigh at this assertion.
Lucy went on. “I am rather
of a jealous temper too by nature, and from our different
situations in life, from his being so much more in
the world than me, and our continual separation, I
was enough inclined for suspicion, to have found out
the truth in an instant, if there had been the slightest
alteration in his behaviour to me when we met, or
any lowness of spirits that I could not account for,
or if he had talked more of one lady than another,
or seemed in any respect less happy at Longstaple
than he used to be. I do not mean to say that
I am particularly observant or quick-sighted in general,
but in such a case I am sure I could not be deceived.”
“All this,” thought Elinor,
“is very pretty; but it can impose upon neither
of us.”
“But what,” said she after
a short silence, “are your views? or have you
none but that of waiting for Mrs. Ferrars’s death,
which is a melancholy and shocking extremity? Is
her son determined to submit to this, and to all the
tediousness of the many years of suspense in which
it may involve you, rather than run the risk of her
displeasure for a while by owning the truth?”
“If we could be certain that
it would be only for a while! But Mrs. Ferrars
is a very headstrong proud woman, and in her first
fit of anger upon hearing it, would very likely secure
every thing to Robert, and the idea of that, for Edward’s
sake, frightens away all my inclination for hasty
measures.”
“And for your own sake too,
or you are carrying your disinterestedness beyond
reason.”
Lucy looked at Elinor again, and was silent.
“Do you know Mr. Robert Ferrars?” asked
Elinor.
“Not at all I never
saw him; but I fancy he is very unlike his brother silly
and a great coxcomb.”
“A great coxcomb!” repeated
Miss Steele, whose ear had caught those words by a
sudden pause in Marianne’s music. “Oh,
they are talking of their favourite beaux, I dare
say.”
“No sister,” cried Lucy,
“you are mistaken there, our favourite beaux
are not great coxcombs.”
“I can answer for it that Miss
Dashwood’s is not,” said Mrs. Jennings,
laughing heartily; “for he is one of the modestest,
prettiest behaved young men I ever saw; but as for
Lucy, she is such a sly little creature, there is
no finding out who she likes.”
“Oh,” cried Miss Steele,
looking significantly round at them, “I dare
say Lucy’s beau is quite as modest and pretty
behaved as Miss Dashwood’s.”
Elinor blushed in spite of herself.
Lucy bit her lip, and looked angrily at her sister.
A mutual silence took place for some time. Lucy
first put an end to it by saying in a lower tone, though
Marianne was then giving them the powerful protection
of a very magnificent concerto
“I will honestly tell you of
one scheme which has lately come into my head, for
bringing matters to bear; indeed I am bound to let
you into the secret, for you are a party concerned.
I dare say you have seen enough of Edward to know
that he would prefer the church to every other profession;
now my plan is that he should take orders as soon as
he can, and then through your interest, which I am
sure you would be kind enough to use out of friendship
for him, and I hope out of some regard to me, your
brother might be persuaded to give him Norland living;
which I understand is a very good one, and the present
incumbent not likely to live a great while. That
would be enough for us to marry upon, and we might
trust to time and chance for the rest.”
“I should always be happy,”
replied Elinor, “to show any mark of my esteem
and friendship for Mr. Ferrars; but do you not perceive
that my interest on such an occasion would be perfectly
unnecessary? He is brother to Mrs. John Dashwood that
must be recommendation enough to her husband.”
“But Mrs. John Dashwood would
not much approve of Edward’s going into orders.”
“Then I rather suspect that
my interest would do very little.”
They were again silent for many minutes.
At length Lucy exclaimed with a deep sigh
“I believe it would be the wisest
way to put an end to the business at once by dissolving
the engagement. We seem so beset with difficulties
on every side, that though it would make us miserable
for a time, we should be happier perhaps in the end.
But you will not give me your advice, Miss Dashwood?”
“No,” answered Elinor,
with a smile, which concealed very agitated feelings,
“on such a subject I certainly will not.
You know very well that my opinion would have no weight
with you, unless it were on the side of your wishes.”
“Indeed you wrong me,”
replied Lucy, with great solemnity; “I know
nobody of whose judgment I think so highly as I do
of yours; and I do really believe, that if you was
to say to me, ’I advise you by all means to
put an end to your engagement with Edward Ferrars,
it will be more for the happiness of both of you,’
I should resolve upon doing it immediately.”
Elinor blushed for the insincerity
of Edward’s future wife, and replied, “This
compliment would effectually frighten me from giving
any opinion on the subject had I formed one. It
raises my influence much too high; the power of dividing
two people so tenderly attached is too much for an
indifferent person.”
“’Tis because you are
an indifferent person,” said Lucy, with some
pique, and laying a particular stress on those words,
“that your judgment might justly have such weight
with me. If you could be supposed to be biased
in any respect by your own feelings, your opinion
would not be worth having.”
Elinor thought it wisest to make no
answer to this, lest they might provoke each other
to an unsuitable increase of ease and unreserve; and
was even partly determined never to mention the subject
again. Another pause therefore of many minutes’
duration, succeeded this speech, and Lucy was still
the first to end it.
“Shall you be in town this winter,
Miss Dashwood?” said she with all her accustomary
complacency.
“Certainly not.”
“I am sorry for that,”
returned the other, while her eyes brightened at the
information, “it would have gave me such pleasure
to meet you there! But I dare say you will go
for all that. To be sure, your brother and sister
will ask you to come to them.”
“It will not be in my power
to accept their invitation if they do.”
“How unlucky that is! I
had quite depended upon meeting you there. Anne
and me are to go the latter end of January to some
relations who have been wanting us to visit them these
several years! But I only go for the sake of
seeing Edward. He will be there in February, otherwise
London would have no charms for me; I have not spirits
for it.”
Elinor was soon called to the card-table
by the conclusion of the first rubber, and the confidential
discourse of the two ladies was therefore at an end,
to which both of them submitted without any reluctance,
for nothing had been said on either side to make them
dislike each other less than they had done before;
and Elinor sat down to the card table with the melancholy
persuasion that Edward was not only without affection
for the person who was to be his wife; but that he
had not even the chance of being tolerably happy in
marriage, which sincere affection on her side
would have given, for self-interest alone could induce
a woman to keep a man to an engagement, of which she
seemed so thoroughly aware that he was weary.
From this time the subject was never
revived by Elinor, and when entered on by Lucy, who
seldom missed an opportunity of introducing it, and
was particularly careful to inform her confidante,
of her happiness whenever she received a letter from
Edward, it was treated by the former with calmness
and caution, and dismissed as soon as civility would
allow; for she felt such conversations to be an indulgence
which Lucy did not deserve, and which were dangerous
to herself.
The visit of the Miss Steeles at Barton
Park was lengthened far beyond what the first invitation
implied. Their favour increased; they could not
be spared; Sir John would not hear of their going;
and in spite of their numerous and long arranged engagements
in Exeter, in spite of the absolute necessity of returning
to fulfill them immediately, which was in full force
at the end of every week, they were prevailed on to
stay nearly two months at the park, and to assist in
the due celebration of that festival which requires
a more than ordinary share of private balls and large
dinners to proclaim its importance.