This sense came sharply to her one
late afternoon in July. She was sitting out in
the garden, watching Brodrick as he went his slow and
happy rounds. Now and then he paused and straightened
a border, or propped some untended plant, top-heavy
with bloom, or pinned back some wild arm of a climbing
rose flung out to pluck at him as he went by.
He could not but be aware that since Gertrude Collett
left there had been confusion and disorder in the
place she had made perfect.
In these hours of innocent absorption
he was oblivious of Jane who watched him.
The garden was still, with that stillness
that earth takes at sunsets following hot days; stillness
of grass-plots flooded by flat light; stillness of
trees and flowers that stand fixed, held by the light,
divinely vivid. Jane’s vision of her surroundings
had never been so radiant and intense. Yet in
a moment, by some impenetrable way, her thoughts had
wandered back to her solitude in Kensington Square.
She saw herself sitting in her room. She was
dressed in an old gown that she had worn two years
ago, she saw distinctly the fashion and the colour
of it, and the little ink-mark on the sleeve.
She was writing, this solitary woman, with an extraordinary
concentration and rapidity. Jane found herself
looking on, fascinated as by the performance of a stranger,
admiring as she would have admired a stranger.
The solitary woman knew nothing of Hugh Brodrick or
of his house at Putney, and cared less; she had a
desire and a memory in which he had no part. That
seemed to Jane most curious.
Then suddenly she was aware that she,
Jane Brodrick, and this woman, Jane Holland, were
inseparably and indestructibly one. For a moment
her memory and her desire merged with this woman’s
desire and memory, so that the house and the garden
and the figure of her husband became strange to her
and empty of all significance. As for her own
presence in the extraordinary scene, she had no longer
her vague, delicious wonder at its reality. What
she felt was a shock of surprise, of spiritual dislocation.
She was positively asking herself, “What am I
doing here?”
The wonder passed with a sense of shifting in her
brain.
But there was terror for her in this
resurgence of her unwedded self. In any settlement
of affairs between Jane Holland and Jane Brodrick it
would be the younger, the unwedded woman who would
demand of the other her account. It was she who
was aware, already, of the imminent disaster, the
irreparable loss. It was she who suffered when
they talked about the genius of Jane Holland.
For they were talking more than ever.
In another week it would be upon her, the Great Event
of nineteen-five. Her frightful celebrity exposed
her, forced her to face the thing she had brought forth
and was ashamed to own.
She might have brazened it out somehow
but for Nina Lempriere and her book. It appeared,
Nina’s book, in these hours that tingled with
expectation of the terrible Event. In a majestic
silence and secrecy it appeared. Jane had heard
Tanqueray praise it. “Thank heaven,”
he said, “there’s one of us that’s
sinless. Nina’s genius can lay nothing to
her charge.” She saw it. Nina’s
flame was pure. Her hand had virginal strength.
It had not always had it. Her
younger work, “Tales of the Marches,”
showed violence and torture in its strength. It
was as if Nina had torn her genius from the fire that
destroyed it and had compelled it to create.
Her very style moved with the vehemence of her revolt
from Tanqueray. But there had been a year between
Tanqueray and Owen Prothero. For one year Nina
had been immune from the divine folly. And in
that year she had produced her sinless masterpiece.
No wonder that the Master praised her.
And above the praise Jane heard Nina’s
voice proclaiming yet again that the law and the condition
was virginity, untamed and untamable virginity.
And for her, also, was it not the law? According
to her code and Tanqueray’s she had sinned a
mortal sin. She had conceived and brought forth
a book, not by divine compulsion, but because Brodrick
wanted a book and she wanted to please Brodrick.
Such a desire was the mother of monstrous and unshapen
things. In Tanqueray’s eyes it was hardly
less impure than the commercial taint. Its uncleanness
lacked the element of venality; that was all that
could be said. She had done violence to her genius.
She had constrained the secret and incorruptible will.
It had not suffered all at once.
It was still tense with its own young impulse towards
creation. In the beginning of the work it moved
divinely; it was divinely unaware of her and of her
urging.
She could trace the stages of its dissolution.
Nothing that Jane Holland had yet
achieved could compare with that beginning. In
the middle there was a slight decline from her perfection;
further on, a perpetual struggle to recover it; and,
towards the end, a frightful collapse of energy.
She could put her finger on the place; there, at the
close of a page that fairly flared; for the flame,
of course, had leaped like mad before it died.
It was at that point that she had got ill, and that
Brodrick had found her and had taken her away.
After that the sentences came in jerks;
they gasped for breath; they reeled and fell; they
dragged on, nerveless and bloodless, to an unspeakable
exhaustion. Then, as if her genius defied the
ultimate corruption, it soared and made itself its
own funeral fire. She had finished the thing
somehow, and flung it from her as the divine folly
came upon her. The wonder was that she should
have finished it at all.
And Tanqueray might almost say that
she was venal. She had received money for simply
committing this crime. She would receive money
again for perpetuating it in a more flagrant form.
So much down on the awful day of publication; a half-yearly
revenue as long as the abominable work endured.
There might be a great deal of money in it, as Louis
Levine would say. More money than Nina or George
Tanqueray had ever made. It was possible, it
was more than possible, it was hideously probable that
this time she would achieve popularity. It was
just the sort of terrible, ironic thing that happened.
If it did happen she would not be able to look George
Tanqueray in the face.
The date of the Event was fixed now,
the fifteenth of July. It was like death.
She had never thought of it as a personal experience
so long as its hour remained far-off in time.
But the terror of it was on her, now that the thing
was imminent, that she could count the hours.
The day came, the Birthday, as Brodrick
called it, of the Great Book. He had told Tanqueray
long ago that it was the biggest thing she had done
yet. He bore himself, this husband of Jane’s,
with an air of triumphant paternity, as if (Tanqueray
reflected) he had had a hand in it. He had even
sent Tanqueray an early copy. Tanqueray owned
that the fellow was justified. He thought he
could see very plainly Brodrick’s hand, his
power over the infatuated Jinny.
By way of celebrating the fifteenth
he had asked Tanqueray to dinner.
The Levines were there and the John
Brodricks, Dr. Henry Brodrick and Mrs. Heron.
But for the presence of the novelist, the birthday
dinner was indistinguishable, from any family festival
of Brodricks. Solemn it was and ceremonial, yet
intimate, relieved by the minute absurdities, the
tender follies of people who were, as Tanqueray owned,
incomparably untainted. It was Jinny’s
great merit, after all, that she had not married a
man who had the taint. The marvel was how the
editor had contrived to carry intact that innocence
of his through the horrors of his obscene profession.
It argued an incorruptible natural soundness in the
man.
And only the supreme levity of innocence
could have devised and accomplished this amazing celebration.
It took, Tanqueray said to himself, a mind like Brodrick’s
to be unaware of Jinny’s tragedy, to be unaware
of Jinny.
He himself was insupportably aware
of her, as she sat, doomed and agonizing, in her chair
at the head of Brodrick’s table.
They had stuck him, of course, at
her left, in the place of honour. Unprofitable
as he was, they acknowledged him as a great man.
He was there on the ground and on the sanction of
his greatness. Nobody else, their manner had
suggested, was great enough to be set beside Jinny
in her splendid hour. His stature was prized
because it gave the measure of hers. He was there
also to officiate. He was the high priest of the
unspeakable ritual. He would be expected presently
to say something, to perform the supreme and final
act of consecration.
And for the life of him he could not
think of anything to say. The things he thought
could not be said while he sat there, at Brodrick’s
table. Afterwards, perhaps, when he and she were
alone, if she insisted.
But she would not insist. Far
from it. She would not expect him to say anything.
What touched him was her utter absence of any expectation,
the candour with which she received his silence as
her doom.
The ceremony was growing more and
more awful. Champagne had been brought.
They were going he might have foreseen it they
were going to drink to the long life of the Book.
John Brodrick rose first, then Henry,
then Levine. They raised their glasses.
Jane’s terrified eyes met theirs.
“To the Book!” they said.
“To the Book!” Tanqueray found himself
gazing in agony at his glass where the bubbles danced
and glittered, calling him to the toast. For
the life of him he could not rise.
Brodrick was drinking now, his eyes
fixed upon his wife. And Tanqueray, for the life
of him, could not help looking at Jane, to see how
she would take it.
She took it well. She faced the
torture smiling, with a courage that was proof, if
he had wanted proof, of her loyalty to Brodrick.
Her smile trembled as it met Brodrick’s eyes
across the table, and the tenderness of it went to
Tanqueray’s heart. She held out her glass;
and as she raised it she turned and looked full in
Tanqueray’s face, and smiled again, steadily.
“To the Book!” she said.
“To Nina Lempriere’s book! You can
drink now, George.”
He met her look.
“Here’s to you. You immortal Jinny.”
Lucid and comprehending, over the
tilted glass his eyes approved her, adored her.
She flushed under the unveiled, deliberate gaze.
“Didn’t I get you out
of that nicely?” she said, an hour later, outside
in the darkening garden, as she paced the terrace with
him alone. The others, at Brodrick’s suggestion,
had left them to their communion. Brodrick’s
idea evidently was that the novelist would break silence
only under cover of the night.
“Yes,” he said. “It was like
your sweetness.”
“You can’t say,” she continued,
“that I’m not appreciated in my family.”
Through the dark, as her face flashed
towards him, he saw the little devil that sat laughing
in her eyes.
“You needn’t be afraid
to talk about it,” she said. “And
you needn’t lie to me. I know it’s
a tragedy.”
He had never lied to her. It
was not in him to fashion for her any tender lie.
“It’s worse than a tragedy.
It’s a sin, Jinny. And that’s what
I would have saved you from. Other people can
sin and not suffer. You can’t. There’s
your tragedy.”
She raised her head.
“There shall be no more tragedies.”
He went on as if he had not heard
her. “It wouldn’t have mattered if
it had been bad all through. But neither you
nor I, Jinny, have ever written, probably we never
shall write, anything to compare with the beginning
of that book. My God! To think that there
were only six months six months between
that beginning and that end.”
She smiled, saying to herself, “Only six months.
Yes. But what months!”
“You’ve killed a masterpiece,” he
said, “between you.”
“Do you mean Hugh?” she said. “What
had he to do with it?”
“He married you.”
“My crime was committed before he married me.”
“Exactly.” She was
aware of the queer, nervous, upward jerk of his moustache,
precluding the impermissible “When
you were in love with him.”
Her face darkened as she turned to him.
“Let’s talk about Nina’s
book. George there isn’t anybody
like her. And I knew, I knew she’d do it.”
“Did you know that she did it before she saw
Prothero.”
“I know.”
“And that she’s never written a line since?”
“When she does it will be immense. Because
of him.”
“Possibly. She hasn’t married him.”
“After all, George, if it comes to that, you’re
married too.”
“Yes. But I married a woman who can’t
do me any harm.”
“Could anybody.”
She stood still there, on the terrace,
fronting him with the scorn of her question.
He did not answer her at first.
His face changed and was silent as his thought.
As they paced up and down again he spoke.
“I don’t mind, Jinny; if you’re
happy; if you’re really content.”
“You see that I am.”
Her voice throbbed. He caught
the pure, the virginal tremor, and knew it for the
vibration of her soul. It stirred in him a subtle,
unaccountable pang.
She paused, brooding.
“I shall be,” she said, “even if
I never do anything again.”
“Nothing,” he assured
her, “can take from you the things you have done.
Look at Hambleby. He’s enough. After
all, Jinny, you might have died young and just left
us that. We ought to be glad that, as it is, we’ve
got so much of you.”
“So much ”
Almost he could have said she sighed.
“Nothing can touch Hambleby or the genius that
made him.”
“George do you think it’ll
ever come back to me?”
She stood still again. He was
aware now, through her voice, of something tense,
something perturbed and tormented in her soul.
He rejoiced, for it was he who had stirred her; it
was he who had made her feel.
“Of course,” he said,
“it’ll come back. If you choose if
you let it. But you’ll have to pay your
price.”
She was silent. They talked of
other things. Presently the John Brodricks, the
Levines and Mrs. Heron came out into the garden and
said good-night, and Tanqueray followed them and went.
She found Hugh closeted with Henry
in the library where invariably the doctor lingered.
Brodrick made a sign to his brother-in-law as she
entered.
“Well,” he said, “you’ve had
your talk.”
“Oh yes, we’ve had it.”
She lay back in her seat as if exhausted
by hard physical exercise, supporting the limp length
of her arms on the sides of the chair.
The doctor, after a somewhat prolonged
observation of her posture, remarked that she should
make a point of going to bed at ten.
Brodrick pleaded the Birthday of the
Book. And at the memory of the intolerable scene,
and of Tanqueray’s presence in it, her agony
broke out.
“Don’t talk about it.
I don’t want ever to hear of it again.”
“What’s he been saying to you?”
said Brodrick.
“He’d no need to say anything.
Do you suppose I don’t know? Can’t
you see how awful it is for me?”
Brodrick raised the eyebrows of innocence amazed.
“It’s as if I’d
brought something deformed and horrible into the world ”
The doctor leaned forward, more than ever attentive.
“And you would go and
drag it out, all of you, when I was sitting there
in shame and misery. And before George Tanqueray How
could you?”
“My dear Jinny ”
Brodrick was leaning forward too now,
looking at her with affectionate concern.
Her brother-in-law rose and held out
his hand. He detained hers for an appreciable
moment, thoughtfully, professionally.
“I think,” he said, “really, you’d
better go to bed.”
Outside in the hall she could hear him talking to
Hugh.
“It’s physical, it’s
physical,” he said. “It won’t
do to upset her. You must take great care.”
The doctor’s voice grew mysterious,
then inaudible, and she heard Hugh saying he supposed
that it was so; and Henry murmured and mumbled himself
away. Outside their voices still retreated with
their footsteps, down the garden path, and out at
the terrace gate. Hugh was seeing Henry home.
When he came back he found Jane in
the library, sitting up for him. She was excited
and a little flushed.
“So you’ve had your talk, have
you?” she said.
“Yes.”
He came to her and put his hands on her forehead.
“Look here. You ought to have gone to bed.”
She took his hand and drew him to her.
“Henry doesn’t think I’m any good,”
she said.
“Henry’s very fond of you.”
She shook her head.
“To Henry I’m nothing
but a highly interesting neurotic. He watches
me as if he were on the look-out for some abnormal
manifestation, with that delightful air he has of
never being surprised at anything, as if he could
calculate the very moment.”
“My dear ”
“I’m used to it.
My people took me that way, too. Only they hadn’t
a scientific turn of mind, like Henry. They didn’t
think it interesting; and they haven’t Henry’s
angelic patience and forbearance. I was the only
one of the family, don’t you know, who wasn’t
quite sane; and yet so unlike Henry they
considered me rather more responsible than any of
them. I couldn’t get off anything on the
grounds of my insanity.”
All the time, while thus tormenting
him, she seemed profoundly occupied with the hand
she held, caressing it with swift, nervous, tender
touches.
“After all,” she said,
“I haven’t turned out so badly; even from
Henry’s point of view, have I?”
He laughed. “What is Henry’s point
of view?”
She looked up at him quickly.
“You know, and I know that Henry didn’t
want you to marry me.”
The uncaptured hand closed over hers,
holding it tighter than she herself could hold.
“No,” she said. “I’m
not the sort of woman Henry would want you to
marry. To please Henry ”
“I didn’t marry to please Henry.”
“To please Henry you should
have married placable flesh and blood, very large
and handsome, without a nerve in her body. The
sort of woman who has any amount of large and handsome
flesh-and-blood children, and lives to have them,
thrives on them. That’s Henry’s idea
of the right woman.”
He admitted that it had once been
his. He had seen his wife that was to be, placable,
as Jinny said, sane flesh and blood, the mother of
perfect children.
“And so, of course,” said Jinny, “you
go and marry me.”
“Of course,” said Brodrick. He said
it in the voice she loved.
“Why didn’t you marry
her? She wouldn’t have bothered your life
out.” She paused. “On the other
hand, she wouldn’t have cared for you as I do.
That sort of woman only cares for her children.”
“Won’t you care for them, Jinny?”
“Not as I care for you,” said Jinny.
And to his uttermost amazement she
bowed her head over his hands and cried.