Nearly four months had passed and
Margaret was still a pantry-maid in the same private
hospital. The V.A.D. who was to have gone to
France had suffered as great a disappointment as Margaret,
for at the very last moment word had been sent to
her it had been unavoidably delayed that
her services in France would not yet be required.
Margaret, with her bigness of nature, had insisted
upon the girl retaining the post in the wards and
letting things go on as they were. Her “bit”
was very, very dull, but it was her “bit,”
and nothing she did, she knew, could in any way compare
in dullness to the lives of the boys in the trenches.
So she worked and endured, and found the necessary
change of scene in the mixed company of her garden-square
society.
The days fled past. It was a
dull life for a young girl, but since the war began
all girls worthy of their country had said good-bye
to the pleasures of youth. Youth had no time
to be young; old age had forgotten that it was old.
The renaissance of patriotism had transformed England.
The war recognized neither old age nor youth; it
opened its hungry jaws and took everyone in.
Margaret had neither seen nor heard
anything of Michael since the eventful winter night
when she had handed him a cup of coffee in the free-refreshment-room
at the large northern station. She did not even
know what regiment he was in. That, of course,
was owing to her own stupidity; it was a matter of
constant regret to her that she had not at the time
had the forethought to ask the weeping woman on the
platform what regiment her husband was in. Knowing
nothing more than that Michael was at the Front, all
she could do was to keep an eye on each day’s
casualty list in The Times newspaper.
But even as her eyes hastily scanned the long columns
of small print, she said to herself, “I need
not look his name will not be there.
I have had my assurance of his safety.”
She was certain now that the mystic
message, which lay locked away in the dispatch-box
which held her most important papers, had been sent
to her to help her. It had been given to her
to lessen her loneliness and to ease her anxiety.
Of course, this state of certainty
had its feebler moments, and many, many times as she
did her day’s work she became affected by the
waves of pessimism which spread at intervals over
the British Isles. At these times she went about
the pantry chalk-faced and tragic-eyed; but generally,
when her suffering was becoming more than she could
endure, from visualizing Michael blind, or limbless,
or, still worse, an imbecile through shell-shock,
a clear voice would speak to her, her super-self would
repeat the contents of her treasured message.
The fact that her hand had written
the message before and not after Michael’s going
to the Front established her confidence in it.
If it had been after, her sound judgment told her
that suggestion might have had something to do with
the automatic writing.
It was early spring, and Margaret’s
country-loving nature cried out for the smell of damp
fields, for the scents and the sounds of untrodden
paths. The long twilight evenings seemed the
loneliest hours to her in London. Their beauty
was wasted. But the real country was denied her,
for what distance could her two-hours-off take her
from London? Scarcely beyond soot-blackened trees
and the prim avenues of suburban respectability.
But she had one great pleasure to look forward to the
Iretons were to be in London for the season, or, rather,
what used to be termed the season in London.
They were to arrive in Clarges Street
that very night. They were coming to England
to help in the arrangements for the better equipping
of native military hospitals in Egypt. Hadassah’s
knowledge of the native’s likes and dislikes
was considerable.
Margaret was now on her way to a tube
railway-station. The afternoon was so glorious
that she was going to make an excursion to Kew.
She would just have time to look at the maythorns
and hurry back. The one brave laburnum which
gave brightness and fragrance to her garden-square
told her that in the larger open spaces the flowering
shrubs would be at their best.
As she ran down the steps of the tube
station, she saw that a train which would take her
to Hammersmith, where she would have to change for
Kew Gardens, was drawn up at the platform; the passengers
who were leaving it were trying to ascend the stairs.
With youthful tightness she leapt down the last two
or three steps and sprang across the platform.
She only just had time to step into the train before
the iron gates closed behind her.
A little breathless with excitement
and greatly pleased that she had succeeded in catching
the train, she obeyed the order of the officious guard
to “Step along don’t block the
gangway!”
The carriage was not full, but there
were not many empty seats in it, so Margaret hastily
sank into the one which was nearest to her and close
to the door. It happened to be near to one on
which a soldier was seated. His kit was lying
at his feet in front of him. As she sat down,
a voice said quietly:
“I’d advise you to sit
a little further on I’m not very nice.”
Margaret never grasped the meaning
of the words; the voice was all she heard. It
made her heart bound, and her senses reel; her bewilderment
was overwhelming.
Some instinct made the soldier swing
right round; he had been sitting with his broad back
turned to the vacant seat, which Margaret still occupied.
They faced each other; the soldier was Michael.
Under his ardent gaze Margaret paled
pitifully and made a valiant effort to speak, to collect
her thoughts. All that came from her trembling
lips were the prosaic words, rather timidly spoken:
“Is it you, Michael?”
They seemed to content Michael and
tell him a thousand things which dazed and intoxicated
him. His surprise was even greater than Margaret’s.
“Yes, it is me, Meg,” he said. “Thank
God we’ve met!”
For Margaret, in one moment all the
long months of doubt and pride were wiped out.
Michael’s eyes had banished them. Her
characteristic courage and her self-possession returned.
She put her hand on the top of Michael’s, the
one which held his rifle. Her touch thrilled
the soldier home from the Front; it travelled through
his veins like an electric current. Margaret’s
eyes had dropped; now they met her lover’s again.
The train in its narrow channel under
the city was making such a noise that it was impossible
to hear even a loud voice above its hideous rattle.
There are few noises more devastating to conversation
than the awful roar of a London tube-railway.
But Love speaks with an eloquence which no noise
can drown; its sympathy and passion carry it far above
the din and noise of battle. Margaret and Michael
knew it well. If Love depended upon words, what
a poor cold thing it would be! No quarrels would
ever be settled, no journeys end in lovers’ meetings.
Michael moved the hand which Margaret
clasped. It was hard to do it, but he felt compelled
to.
“I’m horribly verminous,”
he said, apologetically. “I’m just
back from the trenches you ought to keep
further off.”
Margaret’s eyes dropped; a flame
of love’s shyness spread over her glowing face.
It heightened her beauty and bewildered Michael.
He longed to take her in his arms and kiss her even
before the whole carriage-full of people. Perhaps
in the early days of the war the scene would only
have brought tears and tender smiles to worldly eyes.
Margaret tried to say something, she
scarcely knew what just anything to break
the passion of their silence, but the roaring of the
train drowned her trembling question. How she
hated the swaying and groaning and the rattling of
the tube train as it dashed through its confined way!
Never before had it seemed so awful, so maddening.
Michael, too, was tongue-tied.
How could he offer Margaret any explanation, or ask
if she had understood, while the train drowned the
loudest voices? What a hideous place for a lovers’
meeting, after months of weary longing!
When the train drew up at Knightsbridge
Margaret rose from her seat. Her desire to see
Kew had fled. It mattered little now where she
went; she was only conscious of the fact that she
must put an end to the present strain. If Michael
was as anxious to speak to her as she was to speak
to him, he would follow her. He was obviously
home on leave. He was a free man.
As she rose from her seat, Michael
hurriedly gathered his kit together and rose also,
and pushed his way through the crowd of passengers
who were disgorging from the train. Whatever
happened, he must keep her in sight; her obviously
unpremeditated leaving of the train left him in doubt
as to her feelings towards him.
He was on leave, he was in “Blighty,”
and Margaret was only a few steps ahead. He
would risk anything rather than let her disappear and
be lost once more.
When Margaret reached the platform,
she turned round. She wondered if Michael had
left the train. He was standing by her side.
She laughed delightedly, a girl’s healthy laugh,
and gave a breathless gasp.
“May I?” he said. “I have
risked annoying you.”
“Annoying me!” Margaret’s
eyes banished the idea; they carried him off his feet.
He was a soldier, home from the war; she was a girl,
fresh and sweet. She laid her hand on his arm.
“I’m not angry, Michael I
never was angry. Besides, you’re . . .
you’re . . .” she hesitated. “You’re
a Tommy,” she said, “and I love every one
of them.”
Michael knew that her shyness made
her link him with the men who were fighting for their
country. Even with the fondest lovers, there
is a nervous shyness between them for the first moments
of meeting after a prolonged separation. Margaret
had moved closer to his side. His passion drew
her to him; it was like the current of a magnet.
“You mustn’t stand so
close,” he said, laughingly. “I’m
horribly verminous really I am!”
“As if I cared, Mike!”
Margaret’s words poured from her lips.
Ordinary as they were, they were a love-lyric to his
ears.
“May I come with you?”
he asked. “Where were you going to?
I’ve so much to say, so much to ask you!”
“I was going to Kew,”
she said, blushingly. “But I changed my
mind.”
Their eyes laughed as they met; he
knew why she had changed her plans.
As they went up the station steps
together, they were separated by a number of people
who were hurrying to catch the next train. When
they reached the open street, Michael made a signal
to the driver of a taxi-cab who was touting for passengers.
He instantly drew up, jumped from his seat and opened
the door. Michael stood beside him, while Margaret,
obeying his eyes, stepped into the cab. She asked
herself no questions; she was only conscious of Michael’s
air of protection and possession. After her
lonely life in London, it almost made her cry.
It was the most delicious feeling she had ever experienced.
She gave herself up to it.
In Michael’s presence her pride
and dignity and wounded womanhood were swept away.
Even Freddy, in his soldier’s grave, was forgotten.
Her whole life and world was Michael; he began it
and ended it. This verminous and roughly-dressed
Tommy, who was gazing at her with eyes which bewildered
and humbled her, was the dearest thing on earth.
She was comfortably seated; Michael
had shut the door, and they were side by side, waiting
for the taxi to go on. The next moment the driver
popped his head in at the window.
“Where to, sir?” he said,
politely. Michael’s worn, weatherbeaten
face had called up his sentiment for the men at the
front.
“Where to?” Michael repeated
foolishly. He paused. “Oh, anywhere!
Anywhere will do it doesn’t matter.”
He smiled. “I’m back in old Blighty that’s
all that matters anywhere is good enough
for me.”
“Right you are, sir! I’ll take you
somewhere pleasant.”
Margaret smiled. She was, indeed,
all smiles and heart-beats and nervous anticipation.
The moment the taxi had swung away
from the station, it entered a quiet street, bordered
with high houses on either side. Michael lost
no time; he folded her in his arms and kissed her
again and again, and held her to him.
“This is heaven, just heaven,
darling!” he said ardently. “I could
eat you all up, you’re so fresh and sweet and
delicious!”
Meg was unresisting. Her yielding
told her lover more than hours of explanation could
have done. All she said was:
“But what if I don’t think it’s
heaven?”
“What indeed?” he said,
happily. “But don’t you?”
He had released her to read her answer in her eyes.
She said nothing; words seemed for lighter moments.
“Say something nice,” he pleaded.
“I love you, Mike,” she said shyly.
“Is that enough?”
“It’s all I want,”
he said, while Meg wound her arms round his neck and
drew his face nearer hers to receive her kiss.
As she nestled against him, he said tenderly, “Remember,
I’m verminous; I’m not fit to touch, dearest.”
“I don’t care! I
don’t mind if I get covered with them,”
she laughed. “And I don’t care if
all the world sees me kissing you! I just love
you, Mike, and you’re here nothing
in all the world matters except that!”
She unclasped her hands. Her
weeping face was pressed to his rough uniform; horrible
as it was, she was kissing it tenderly, almost devoutly,
stroking it with her fingers. It gave her a sense
of pride and assurance that he was there beside her.
In the beautiful way known to love
and youth, the foolish things they said and left unsaid
told them whispers of the wonderful things which were
to be. Michael was too exacting in his demands
to allow of sustained conversation; sentences lost
themselves in “one more kiss,” or in one
more bewildering meeting of happy eyes.
At last Michael said not
without a feeling of nervousness, for he had asked
few questions, and the scraps of information which
Margaret had volunteered he had so often interrupted
by his own impetuous demands, that she had accepted
the fact that all explanations and questioning must
wait until the excitement of their meeting had abated “Why
did Freddy not answer my letters? Why did you
leave Egypt without one word?”
His voice expressed the fact that
his letters had contained the full explanation of
his conduct. It also said, “Why this forgiveness,
if you were so unkind?”
It brought a strange revelation to
Margaret of the ravages of war, of the changes which
it had made in their lives. She remained lost
in thought.
“Will Freddy consent? Will he understand,
as you do?”
Margaret shivered. Her hand
left Michael’s; her fingers touched the band
of crepe which she was wearing on her uniform coat-sleeve.
“No, no, Meg!” he cried.
“Not Freddy! Anybody but Freddy!”
His words were a cry of horror, of anguish.
In the surprise and excitement of their meeting,
he had forgotten to ask for Freddy. Even though
he was in his soldier’s uniform, his happiness
had obliterated the war. He had the true soldier’s
temperament a fighter while fighting had
to be done, a lover of pleasure in peace-time.
“Yes,” she said, “Freddy.
He was only in Flanders a few weeks.”
Michael put his arms round her tenderly,
protectingly. “You poor little girl, you
brave little woman!”
Margaret loved his anguish, his complete
understanding of the fact that of all people it was
Freddy who should have been spared.
“If you had only seen him, Mike!
He was so young, so fair. And he never had
a chance.”
Michael’s eyes questioned her words.
“He was just sniped at the very
beginning. That was the hardest part of it to
know that all his talents and intellect had been wasted!”
Michael held her closer. “Not
wasted, dearest, don’t say that.”
“I didn’t exactly mean
wasted. But he could have done such great things
for the world; he could surely have been given work
more worthy of his abilities!”
“He is doing wonderful things
now, Meg, he’s hard at work. Freddy just
got his promotion look at it that way.”
He kissed her trembling lips; tears were flooding
her glorious eyes.
“That’s what Hadassah says.”
“Hadassah?”
“Yes, Hadassah.”
Margaret sighed. “Oh, Michael, we have
so much to talk about whatever shall we
do?” She laughed tearfully. Telling Michael
about Freddy’s death had brought back the anguish
of the year which had separated them. “You
can’t imagine how kind and sweet she has been
to me, and how hard they both tried to find you!”
She paused. “Freddy tried, too he
was the best and dearest brother, Mike.”
“I know it,” he said;
his words were a groan. He was trying to grasp
the truth of Margaret’s news. Nothing which
he had seen in the war brought its waste and sacrifice
more vividly before his eyes than the fact that Freddy
was dead, the living, vital Freddy, the energetic,
brilliant Freddy, whom he always visualized picking
up the gleaming gems in the vast Egyptian tomb; he
saw the scene with painful clearness.
There was a little silence.
Margaret’s hands were clasped tightly in the
sunburnt hands of her “Tommy.” Freddy
was in both their minds, and the life they had shared
with him in the Valley the sense of order
and method and ardour for work which he had instilled
into their days.
Margaret was resting against Michael,
as open about her love for him as any ’Arriet.
She could think of Freddy without any feeling of guilt
or even doubt of his approval. The things which
come from within cannot be explained by forces from
without. It was not what Michael had done or
had said which had banished her pride and told her
of his faithfulness. It was the consciousness
which came from within, the consciousness which had
always fought back the forces from without. She
had not felt one qualm of conscience, for Freddy was
understanding and approving. He would know that
any doubt she had ever had had been banished the moment
Michael had taken her in his arms. Freddy, who
had only blamed him for his weakness, would realize
that even in that he had misjudged him. If Michael
had had any guilt on his conscience, he would never
have behaved as he had done. He had read in her
eyes that her love for himself was unchanged, and
knowing himself to be worthy of her love, he had not
stopped to consider smaller things. She was so
thankful that he had taken the bull by the horns.
And now they were thinking of less
bewildering things than their own love for each other.
Michael was tenderly dreaming of Freddy. Margaret
was reviewing Freddy’s true attitude towards
Michael in her mind. It was true that he had
said that until he gave some satisfactory explanation
of his behaviour, she was not to treat him as her
lover. Well, her finer senses told her that Michael
had given her a satisfactory explanation, and she
was certain that Freddy also knew it. He had,
by his taking her in his arms without one word of pleading
or explanation, given her the fairest and most perfect
assurance of his faithfulness to her and of his right
to ask for her love.
These thoughts passed rapidly through
her mind, while she silently enjoyed the delight of
feeling Michael’s close presence by her side.
Never, even in Egypt, under the high-sailing moon in
the great Sahara, had she loved him as romantically
as she did at this moment. As a weather-stained,
wind-tanned Tommy he was dearer to her than ever he
had been in the days when, as a painter and an Egyptologist,
he had opened her eyes to a new world of intellectual
enjoyment.
Michael’s mind was obsessed
by Freddy’s death. He had never for one
moment imagined that such a thing was in the least
likely to happen. He did not know that Freddy
was at the Front; he had imagined to himself that
such exceptional brains and unusual qualities would
have been given other work to do, than to stand all
day long knee-deep in mud in the trenches of Flanders.
His heart ached for Margaret. Her devotion
to Freddy was exceptional; her pride in him had been
the keynote of her existence. He spoke abruptly,
while his hands clasped hers hungrily and tightly.
“Would Freddy mind?” he
said. “I can’t be disloyal to him!”
“Mind?” Meg said questioningly.
“Mind my loving you? He knew my love
could never change it was born in unchanging
Egypt.”
“Yes, mind if you married me
while I’m on leave? I’ve got
a whole fortnight, and my commission.”
“Oh!” Meg said breathlessly. “You
go at such a pace!”
Michael laughed boyishly at her astonishment.
Her woman’s mind had not thought of marriage;
it was satisfied with the present conditions.
“I don’t think Freddy
would mind not now. But” her
laugh joined Michael’s “you
see, you haven’t asked if I’d mind.
We aren’t even engaged you wouldn’t
be. Do you remember?”
Michael pulled round her head with
his hands, and kissed her lips. “I don’t
care if the whole world sees,” he said, quoting
her words. “Don’t pull away your
head I’m just ‘a bloomin’
Tommy’ back in Blighty with his girl.”
Meg resigned herself to his kisses.
“All London’s doing it,” she said
breathlessly. “You’ll see fathers
and sons, and mothers and sons, and lovers walking
arm in arm, in the West End even. Their time
together is too short and precious to think of stupid
conventions. The national reserve of the English
nation is swept away.”
While Margaret was speaking, she was
thinking and thinking. Could she marry him before
he returned to the Front? It was all so sudden.
But why not? War had taught women to take what
happiness they could get in their two hands, not to
let it slip. Michael made her thoughts more
definite.
“Did Freddy trust me?” he asked.
Meg’s eyes dropped; her heart beat painfully.
“He didn’t,” Michael
said. “Don’t pain yourself, dearest,
by answering. He’ll understand better
now everything will be made clear.”
“Don’t blame him, Mike!”
“I’m not blaming him I’d
have done the same. It sounded beastly, the
whole story. Hang Millicent Mervill!”
Margaret proceeded to tell him in
broken sentences that she had seen Millicent in Cairo,
and related something of what she had told her and
how, after that, she had kept the promise which she
had made to Freddy, to go back to England if she heard
from either Michael himself or from Millicent that
they had been together in the desert.
“And you heard that she was in my camp?”
“Yes Millicent took care that I heard
that, and . . .” she paused.
Michael looked into her eyes. “And you
went back England?”
“Yes, I kept my promise.”
Her eyes told him that she had kept it because her
honour demanded it, not because she believed all that
Millicent had told her.
“And, knowing her story, you
didn’t condemn me, you still believed in me
and loved me?” His eyes thanked her.
Margaret returned his steadfast gaze.
“Yes, it was not hard to trust you, Mike.
I remembered our promise to help and trust one another.
What are promises and vows made for if they are not
to be kept when they are put to the test? We
did not make ours lightly I told you I
should understand.”
“Dearest, how beautiful your
love is! To-day you welcomed me without one
shadow of reproach! Had I not read in your eyes
all that I did, I should not have dared to follow
you when you left the train.”
“Would you have taken me in
your arms if you had been guilty, if Millicent had
told the truth?” The words conveyed a world
of meaning to Michael. “I have often grumbled,
Mike I have thought that you might have
let me hear the story from your own lips, or by letter.
I know that in his heart Freddy always thought you
were only to be blamed for allowing her to stay in
your camp I know he never really believed
that you had arranged the meeting, or that you were
her lover.”
Michael grasped her two hands in his,
tightly. “I never was, Meg, I never was!
I hated her for coming, I tried to get rid of her.”
“I knew it, Mike deep,
deep down I knew it. But it hurt.”
She leaned against him. “Oh, how it hurt,
dearest! And you never wrote or explained that
was what I found hardest to bear. I suppose you
were so certain that I trusted you that you never
thought about what others might say; but love makes
us exacting, jealous, and you might have written,
dearest! Then Freddy would have known.
How could I make him understand all that my heart
knew? How can one make others see the things
which come from within?”
Michael put his arms round her.
“My darling,” he said, “I did write,
I wrote often. I wrote directly Millicent appeared
in the desert; I wrote again before I was ill.
You know how many letters go astray you
know how many were intercepted by German spies before
the war broke out.”
“You were ill?” Meg started.
“I knew you were, I told Freddy you were ill.
But Millicent spoke as if you were in such perfect
health that I had to abandon the conviction.”
Her voice was an apology.
“I was so ill with fever,”
Michael said, “that I wasn’t able to write,
and the faithful Abdul couldn’t. Like many
Arabs, he can speak a smattering, and a very fair
one, of three or four languages, but he can’t
write a line in any one of them. As soon as I
was strong enough to travel I went back to the Valley.”
“Oh, did you?” He felt
Margaret tremble as she said the words.
“I went back to find our Eden
a barren desert, Meg, no sign of either Freddy or
you in it. It was horrible. I started off
to Cairo in hopes of learning from the Iretons where
you had gone to, to discover what you had heard of
Millicent.” His pressure of Meg’s
hands explained the full meaning of his words.
“But they had left Cairo it was very
hot so I returned to England by way of Italy.
In Naples I had a slight relapse I had
to wait there for some time, until I was able to continue
my journey. I only arrived in London the day
before war was declared. Of course I volunteered
at once I was glad to do it. Life
seemed empty of all its former sweetness. I don’t
think I cared what happened to me; and I did care
what happened to England and Belgium. I was
at last going to fight in the great fight against absolute
monarchy and militarism!”
When Michael had finished his short
account of his doings, which merely touched on essentials,
they realized that they were in Hyde Park. Margaret’s
eyes had caught sight of a clock over the gateway as
they entered; she had noticed how her two hours were
flying, even while her conscious self was enthralled
with her lover’s story. Spring was in
the year; it was in the hearts of the united lovers.
Love smiled to them from the budding shrubs and from
the daffodils swaying in the breeze.
To Michael “Blighty” was
the most beautiful land in the world. His heart
was so burdened with happiness that Margaret had to
laugh at his high spirits and absurd remarks.
He was the old enthusiastic Mike, delighting in life
and embracing it rapturously.
In the midst of this intoxication
of happiness, Margaret’s sense of duty and responsibility,
her Lampton characteristics, urged her. The
clock over the archway had subconsciously reminded
her that she was, after all, a pantry-maid in a hospital
full of wounded soldiers; that the soldier by her
side was a part and portion of the great war; that
war, not love, ruled the world; this interlude had
been stolen from the God of Battles.
“Time’s flying, dearest,”
she said. “I’ve less than one more
hour. Let’s drive to a little garden-square
close to my hospital we can dismiss the
taxi there and talk until I have to go in that’s
to say, if you are free to come.”
“Are you nursing?” he
said. His eyes looked questioningly at her blue
uniform.
“No, not yet I’m a pantry-maid.”
“A what?” he said, laughingly. “You’re
a darling!"’
“I wash up tea-cups and saucers
which Tommies drink from, and lay out trays
with tea-cups and saucers all day long.”
She paused. “That’s as near as
I’ve got to the war.”
“With your brains, Meg is
that all they could find for you to do?” His
encircling arm hugged her closely. Each moment
she was becoming more desirable and beautiful in his
eyes; each moment life in the trenches seemed further
and further away.
“Freddy was sniped,” Margaret
said, “before he even killed a German.
Washing up dirty cups makes me mind it less.”
“You dear darling,” Michael
said. “I understand and Freddy knows.”
“I’ll tell the man where
to drive to,” Margaret said bravely. “Then
we can be together until I have to begin work.”
She raised the speaking-tube to her lips and told
the driver where to go, explaining the most direct
way to the secluded square, When she dropped the tube
and sank back into her seat Michael’s arm was
round her; she had felt his eyes and their passion,
gazing at her while she instructed the driver.
“Will you marry me the day after
to-morrow?” he said. “I’ll
get a special licence. Let’s start this
little time of perfect happiness at once, Meg it
may never come again.”
Meg laughed nervously, but there was
gladness in the sound of her voice. “But,
Mike, it’s so sudden the day after
to-morrow!”
“So was our love, darling don’t
you remember?” He paused. “Am I
asking too much? You might be my wife for less
than two weeks, beloved, remember that.”
They looked into each other’s
eyes. Meg knew the meaning of his words; he
was a Tommy on leave.
“I can’t go on having
hairbreadth escapes to the end of the war,” he
said. “Up to now I’m the mascot amongst
the boys; I’ve had prodigious luck.”
Meg remained silent. Her heart
was beating. His hair-breadth escapes what
were they due to? She saw her vision of him in
her London bedroom, surrounded by the rays of Aton.
She nursed the knowledge of it in her heart she
dared not tell him.
“Over and over again, Meg, the
most extraordinary things have happened. I can’t
tell you them all now they would sound like
exaggerations, but I’m almost beginning to agree
with the boys that I’ve a charmed life.”
Meg longed to confide her secret to
him, but something held her back; something said to
her that he was not meant to know it, that if he knew
he might be tempted to do still more foolhardy deeds,
he would feel compelled to put her mystical message
to the test. She remained silent; her mind was
working too quickly for speech. She had forgotten
that Michael wanted her answer. Her heart had
given it so willingly that words were scarcely needed,
but he pressed her for her consent. There are
some words which lovers like to hear spoken by beautiful
lips.
“You are the mistress of my
happiness,” he urged. “And if our
happiness in this world is to be condensed into twelve
days, surely it would be worth while seizing it and
being thankful for it? In this world of agony
and death, twelve days of life at its fullest is of
more account than a long lifetime of unrecognized
benefits and indefinite happiness.”
Meg agreed that the war had taught
people to be thankful for what seemed to her pitifully
small mercies; people married for ten days or for
a fortnight at the longest, knowing that for that little
time of forgetfulness their husbands were among the
quick; at the end of it they might be among the dead.
“Then, if I can get a special
licence to-morrow, will you marry me the day after?
If I may go back to the Front as your husband, Meg,
I think I can win the war. My life will be more
charmed than ever.” He laughed gaily.
“What will the boys say? I’m the
only one in the trench who doesn’t write to
about six girls every day, telling each one that she
is the only girl he loves.”
Margaret’s answer was in her
laugh, which was all love, and in the lips she held
up to meet Michael’s kiss. “And it’s
proud I’ll be to be Mrs. Amory!” she said.
“And ye can tell the boys that, if you like.”
She broke off suddenly from her mock Irish tones,
and said more gravely, “Isn’t it wonderful?
Only an hour ago I was alone in London, so lonely
that the very flowers hurt me! I hated the spring
in the year it laughed at my dull room
and humdrum existence. And now ”
“And now,” he said, “you
are going to be a soldier’s wife, you are going
to marry a verminous Tommy in two days’ time,
you darling!”
Meg looked at her own dark uniform.
“I don’t see even one,” she said,
“but I’ll have to be careful. I’ll
change when I go in. Are you really as bad as
that?”
“I tried to clean myself up
a bit,” he said. “But I have been
awful. That’s the thing I hate most about
the whole business. I’ve got used to all
the other discomforts long ago, and to everything else.”
“Even to the killing of human beings, Mike?”
“Yes,” he said.
“Even to the killing of brave men. I know
what you’re saying to yourself I
thought that too, I thought it would send me mad,
I longed to kill myself to get out of it. But,
in an attack, when you’ve seen your own jolly
pals, who have lived in the trenches with you, bleeding
and tattered, spatchcocked against barbed wire, and
had to leave them sticking to it, their eyes haunt
you, your blood gets up, you long for a hundred hands
to shoot with, instead of only two. When you’ve
seen the result of Prussian militarism on decent German
soldiers, you know that it’s your duty to destroy
it, to give the German people, as well as the rest
of the world, their freedom and rights.”
“If only we could get at the
Prussian military power, and spare the wretched soldiers they
are all sons and husbands, and somebody’s darlings,”
Meg said pathetically.
“But we can’t. It’s
their punishment, perhaps, poor devils, for having
submitted to such an arrogant, absolute monarchy.
To get at the rulers we have to slaughter the innocent.
It sounds all wrong, but I know it’s the only
way.”
“I suppose so,” Margaret
said. “But it does seem hard, just because
they have been law-abiding, industrious, obedient subjects,
they are to be slaughtered like sheep and made to
do all sorts of cruel acts which will brand them for
ever as barbarians in the eyes of the world.
There must be thousands and thousands of them who
are decent men.”
“There is a saying that every
country has the Government it deserves. They
have got theirs. A German Liberal has written
these words to-day, or something like them.
He says, ’Peace and war are, after all, not so
much the result of foreign policy (strange though it
may appear) as the inevitable consequences of the
inward constitution of the State. “International
anarchy” is not a thing apart, but only the natural
consequence of feudal military institutions.
Hence away with these institutions.’”
“But will they ever away with them in Germany?”
“Not unless we, the Allies,
crush the feudal military constitution; not until
the people realize that their submission has brought
this war upon themselves.”
“But surely up to now we have
admired law-abiding, uncomplaining peoples?”
“I haven’t,” Michael laughed.
“You know I haven’t.”
“Oh no, you haven’t!
But then you’re a firebrand, always ’agin
the Government.’”
“I always walked on my head.”
He hugged her as he spoke. “I’m
doing it to-day, darling.”
“Poor old Freddy!” Margaret
said. “If he could only hear us now, he’d
think I was anti-war, and you were pro-war.”
She sighed. “If he could only see you
in a Tommy’s uniform, defending the morality
of taking human lives!”
“Qui sait, Meg?
He probably sees far more of it than you or I do.
Don’t you make any mistake about that.
He knows that I’m fighting in the war because
I’m anti-war, with a vengeance. If this
war isn’t won by the Allies, Meg, there will
be no end to war. It will never cease; it will
burst out at intervals until the Kaiser’s Alexandrian
and Napoleonic dream is accomplished. If he
wins this war, he’ll turn his eyes in other
directions, for new worlds to conquer. With Europe
subdued, there is Egypt, India, America. Lamartine
said, ’It is not the country, but liberty, that
is most imperilled by war.’”
“What did he mean?” Margaret asked.
“’That every victorious
war means for the victorious nation a loss of political
liberty, whilst for the vanquished it is a foundation
of inspiration and democratic progress.’”
“Oh, Mike, and if we win? I mean, when
we win?”
“As our cause is the cause of
right over might, ours is not a war of aggression
or annexation. He was speaking of an aggressive
war.”
“Who was speaking?”
“Well, I was voicing Hermann
Fernau, the brave Liberal who is exiled from the Fatherland.
I can’t give you his exact words, but he says
something like this in his wonderful book, Germany
and Democracy: ’For what would happen
if we Germans emerged victorious from this war?
Our victory would only mean a strengthening of the
dynastic principle of arbitrary power all along the
line. Those of us who bewail the political backwardness
of our Fatherland must realize that a German victory
would prolong this backward condition for centuries.
And not only Germany, but the whole of Europe, would
have to suffer the consequences.’”
“Fancy a German saying that!”
“There are some sane Germans
left, darling. Fernau belongs to the small band
of German Liberals who have been driven from their
country.”
The taxi had reached the garden-square.
They got out and Michael prodigally overpaid the
driver. The man took the money.
“I’d have driven you for
nothing, sir,” he said delightedly, “if
the car was my own. I was young once, and so
was the missus.” He saluted respectfully.
As they turned into the quiet little
garden, Michael said happily, “Why, Meg, what
a dear little bit of France! How did you discover
it?”
“My hospital’s just across
the square, and so is my bedroom. This is my
sitting-room.”
They found a quiet seat amongst the
tombstones and sat down, a typical resort for a Tommy
and his sweetheart. When they had been seated
for a few moments, Michael said:
“It’s a far cry to the
Valley, and the little wooden hut, and the tombs of
the Pharaohs, Meg.”
Meg’s eyes swept the garden-square;
the laburnum-tree was shedding flakes of gold from
its long tassels; they were falling like yellow rain
in the spring breeze.
“Very, very far,” she
said as her eyes pointed to the smoke-begrimed tombstones.
“Here the homes of the dead seem so forsaken,
so humble. Death has triumphed. In the
Valley the dead were the eternal citizens, their homes
were immortal. The dead have no abiding cities
here, and even the palaces of the living will be crumbled
into powder before Egypt’s tombs show any signs
of wear and decay.”
Their thoughts having turned to Egypt,
beautiful memories were recalled. Often broken
sentences spoke volumes. Their time was very
short, so short that Love devised a sort of shorthand
conversation, which saved a thousand words.
And so for the rest of Margaret’s
precious hour they talked and dreamed and loved.
There was so much to explain and so much to tell on
both sides that, as Margaret laughingly said, they
would both still be trying to get through their “bit”
when Michael would have to leave for the Front.
Margaret just left herself time to
hurry upstairs and change her uniform in her lodgings
before she returned to the hospital. Michael
waited for her in the square.
Before they left it, Margaret said,
“I want you to shake hands with an old friend
of mine. We’ll have to pass her seat; she
is always here. She’s a great character,
an old actress such a good sort.”
As they passed the shabby little woman,
picking down old uniforms, Meg stopped. The
woman looked up; her eyes brightened. The V.A.D.
had a soldier with her her lover, she could
see that at a glance. He had brought an atmosphere
of romance and passion into the laburnum-lit garden.
Margaret introduced Michael, who was
perfectly at his ease on such an occasion.
“My friend has arrived from
the Front,” she said. “We are going
to be married the day after to-morrow . . .”
she paused, “. . . that is to say, if I can
get leave from my hospital for a week.”
The woman looked up at the handsome
couple. “Well, what a surprise!”
she said, as she stared hard at Michael. “Who
would ever have thought that you were going to be
married so soon? You never even told me you
were engaged! You were very sly.”
She smiled happily.
Margaret laughed at her astonished
expression. “I mustn’t stop to tell
you about it now,” she said. “My
time is up I ought to be back in ten minutes
to my cups and saucers. I just wanted you to
shake hands with the man I’m going to marry.”
The woman rose from her seat.
As she did so, the old scarlet coat which she had
been unpicking fell to her feet. She glanced
at her hands, as much as to say, “They aren’t
very clean.” Michael held out his, ignoring
her hesitation, and gave her slender, artist’s
fingers a hearty shake and warm grasp.
The old actress’s emotions were
kindled; poverty had not dimmed the romance of her
world.
“You’ll do, sir,”
she said. “You’ll do you’ll
do for the sweetest and truest lady that lives in
London town.”
“We have your blessing, then?”
he said gaily. “And you’ll look after
her when I’m at the Front promise
me that?”
“That I will, sir. But
it’s she who looks after me, and more than me.”
She cast her eyes round the strange neighbourhood.
“Looks after us and helps us in a hundred different
ways.” But she was speaking to Michael’s
retreating figure, for Margaret and her lover had left
her. As she watched his swinging strides, she
murmured to herself, “He’ll do for her there’s
no mistaking his kind. He’ll do for her.”
Her thoughts flew to familiar scenes. “There
was something in his voice which reminded me of .
. .” she recalled a celebrated actor. “He
would make a fine Hamlet, a heavenborn Hamlet.”
As they left the gardens Margaret
said, “I have a feeling, Mike, that someone
has been watching us ever since we came into the gardens have
you?”
“No,” Michael said.
“I hadn’t any eyes or ears for anything
but you.”
Margaret smiled. “I felt
it,” she said, “rather than saw it.
But, just this minute, didn’t you see that
dark figure?”
“No. Anyhow, let them
watch I don’t care. Everybody’s
doing it.” His arm was round her.
Meg laughed, but not so whole-heartedly,
and when she was saying good-bye to him at the hospital,
she said, nervously and anxiously, “There’s
that black figure again she’s just
passed us. I saw her yesterday she
watched me go in after my hours on.”
In spite of that fact, Margaret kissed
her Tommy quite openly and flagrantly and in the broad
daylight. She had promised to walk with him
again on the next afternoon during her hours off, and
to marry him the day after, if he got the licence
and she got her leave.
When they had parted she said to herself,
“Ours will be a war-wedding with a vengeance!
When I went out for my two hours this afternoon I
was absolutely free, not even engaged. Now,”
she blushed beautifully, “I am the bride-elect
of a Tommy home on leave for a fortnight!”
After her day’s work was done,
she tried to find the busy matron. When she
found her, she went straight to the point it
was Margaret’s way.
“I want to get married the day
after to-morrow,” she said. “Could
you get someone to take my place? Can you let
me go?”
“For good, do you mean?”
The matron was scarcely surprised. These sudden
marriages were all a part of her day’s work,
the flower and the passion of war.
Margaret’s eyes brightened.
“If you could get a temporary V.A.D., I think
I’d like to come back when he’s gone.”
The older woman looked at her.
“I think you’d better take a rest.
You’ve been at this dull job for a long time
now. Don’t you think you would be better
for it?”
“Perhaps you are right,”
Margaret said. “I really haven’t
had time to consider details I’d
only got as far as wanting the week while he is at
home, to get married in.”
“Take it, by all means,”
the matron said. “I’ve a good long
waiting-list on my books of voluntary helpers to choose
from.” She paused. “I don’t
mean that it will be easy to replace you, Miss Lampton I
wish all my workers gave me as little trouble as you
have done.”
“Oh, but it’s been such
ordinary work! Anyone could have done it as
well.”
“I’ve not been a hospital
nurse for twenty years, Miss Lampton, for nothing.
You can comfort yourself with the fact that a good
worker always makes herself felt in whatever capacity
she is in. No sentiment or romance finds its
way into an area-pantry, though there’s plenty
of it in the wards.” She smiled.
“But in spite of that, your romance seems to
have progressed. I wish you every happiness and
the best of luck.”
Luck nowadays, Margaret knew, meant
but one thing the life of her husband.
“Thank you,” she said. “I’ve
loved being of use. I’ve really been grateful
for the work it’s been what I needed.”
“I think I can get a V.A.D.
to take your place to-morrow morning you
will want all your time. If you will look in
at your usual hour, you will hear if we have got one.
But take my advice, Miss Lampton,” the matron
said, as she turned to leave the astonished Margaret,
“if you are going to nurse, go in for a thorough
hospital training. You’d make a good nurse
. . .” she paused, “. . . that is to say,
if you are free to do it when your husband is at the
Front. Anyhow, think it over. It seems
to me a pity that you should be content to remain a
V.A.D. when you may be wanted for much more serious
work later on.”
When she had said good-bye, Margaret
fled to the telephone. She had so much to do
and arrange that she had to go from one thing to another
as fast as she could. She rang up the rooms
in Clarges Street where she knew that Hadassah Ireton
was going to stay. She ought to have arrived
that afternoon. When at last she got on to the
right number, she was answered by the husband of the
landlady, an ex-butler, and an admirable maitre
de cuisine.
“Has Mrs. Ireton arrived yet?” Margaret
asked.
“Yes, she arrived at five o’clock.
Who shall I say speaking?”
“Ask her if she can speak to
Miss Lampton, please, for a few minutes. Will
you tell her that it is very urgent?”
The next minute Margaret heard Hadassah’s voice.
“Hallo! Miss Lampton, is that you?”
“Yes,” Margaret said. “But,
please, not Miss Lampton!”
“Well, Margaret I
always think of you as Margaret. How nice of
you to ring me up and welcome me to London!”
“Hadassah,” Margaret said
breathlessly; her heart was beating with her news;
she spoke rather loudly, “I rang you up to tell
you that I’m going to be married the day after
tomorrow!”
Hadassah heard Margaret sigh even
through the telephone. It was a sigh of pent-up
emotion, an expression of relief.
Margaret waited. She knew that
she had taken Hadassah so completely by surprise that
she had no answer ready.
“Margaret!” she said at last, in amazement,
“who to?”
Margaret detected, or fancied she
did, a little coldness in her question. There
was certainly not the pleased ring of congratulation
which she had expected in her words.
“Why, to Michael Amory, of course!
Who else could it be?” Margaret’s happy
laugh crackled in Hadassah’s ears.
“Oh, my dear, I’m so glad!
What a wonderful surprise! Is he in London?
When did he turn up?”
“He has been to the Front as
a Tommy, but he’s got his commission in the
same regiment. I only met him to-day he’s
just got back. I feel too bewildered to think;
I scarcely know what I am saying.”
“Is this the first time that
you’ve seen him since you parted in Egypt?”
Hadassah’s voice expressed both amusement and
eager curiosity.
“Yes, to speak to. We
met in the train. Some months ago I saw him at
a railway-station in the North. He was passing
through, and I was there, but we had no opportunity
of speaking to each other.” In the same
breathless voice she said, “Freddy would approve.
I know what you are thinking, but it’s all
right he’s as keen as Freddy about
the war, and there never was anything wrong.”
“I’m so awfully glad. You know I
never doubted him.”
“He arrived in England the day
before war was declared by us. He tried to find
me, but he couldn’t, and so he just gave himself
up to the war. He lost himself in it you
know his way! He thought that Freddy and I would
approve. He was always worthy of me, Hadassah,
but now I’m so proud of him. He would
have joined up in any case, but he thought that in
doing his bit he would atone for his weakness about
Millicent. It was only his old method of letting
things slide he couldn’t get rid of
her, but he was absolutely loyal to me.”
“I understand,” Hadassah
said. “But I admit that it was difficult
for Freddy to look at it in that light.”
“It’s so hard to explain
over the ’phone,” Margaret said.
“And indeed, it isn’t what he has told
me so much it’s just what he makes
me feel.”
“I know, dear. I feel
it’s all right I always felt it was.”
“He has been absolutely true,
Hadassah. Freddy must know that now. And
you know, I can afford to marry.” Her voice
lost its buoyancy.
“Yes, I know, dear. I saw your brother’s
will.”
“And you approve, Hadassah?
It seems a shame not to grasp this little bit of
happiness.” She paused, for above her practical
words came the assurance of Michael’s safety;
the words of the message almost came to her lips.
“I quite approve. In these
awful days, even a fortnight of happiness is a wonderful
thing. Use your own judgment, Margaret it’s
been unerring so far. Take this joy right to
your heart.”
“Will you and your husband witness
our marriage? I want to telegraph to Aunt Anna may
I say that I am being married from your house?
We won’t bother you is it awful
cheek asking you?”
“Why, my dear, of course you
can come here to-morrow, as early as ever you like,
and we’ll go into all the details, and fix up
everything quite nicely. With telephones and
money and London at our backs, you will be astonished
at what a nice little dejeuner we shall have
ready for you.” Hadassah laughed.
“Money has its uses, my dear, in spite of all
your Mike’s oblivion of the fact.”
“Oh, you are too kind!
Won’t it be nice a little dejeuner
a quatre in your rooms? Your husband is
with you? I forgot to ask.”
“Yes, he’s here.
He’ll stand by your Michael. Now, all
you’ve got to do is to look after your own concerns get
your things together and send them here. I’ll
have them packed for you and do all the rest.”
“You angel!” Margaret
said. “Oh, don’t cut us off!”
she cried to the girl at the exchange, for a buzzing
sound filled her ears. “Are you there?
Can you hear? I won’t take much on my
honeymoon,” she said, but her words did not
reach Hadassah; no answer came back to her. They
had been cut off. She quickly put the receiver
back on its hook and hurried off to do the next thing
which suggested itself as being the most important writing
a short list of the things which she would have to
buy the next day, and sending a telegram to her Aunt
Anna.