There are many kinds of fools.
Now, will everybody please sit still until they are
called upon specifically to rise?
I had been every kind of fool except
one. I had expended my patrimony, pretended my
matrimony, played poker, lawn-tennis, and bucket-shops parted
soon with my money in many ways. But there remained
one rule of the wearer of cap and bells that I had
not played. That was the Seeker after Buried
Treasure. To few does the delectable furor come.
But of all the would-be followers in the hoof-prints
of King Midas none has found a pursuit so rich in
pleasurable promise.
But, going back from my theme a while as
lame pens must do I was a fool of the sentimental
sort. I saw May Martha Mangum, and was hers.
She was eighteen, the color of the white ivory keys
of a new piano, beautiful, and possessed by the exquisite
solemnity and pathetic witchery of an unsophisticated
angel doomed to live in a small, dull, Texas prairie-town.
She had a spirit and charm that could have enabled
her to pluck rubies like raspberries from the crown
of Belgium or any other sporty kingdom, but she did
not know it, and I did not paint the picture for her.
You see, I wanted May Martha Mangum
for to have and to hold. I wanted her to abide
with me, and put my slippers and pipe away every day
in places where they cannot be found of evenings.
May Martha’s father was a man
hidden behind whiskers and spectacles. He lived
for bugs and butterflies and all insects that fly or
crawl or buzz or get down your back or in the butter.
He was an etymologist, or words to that effect.
He spent his life seining the air for flying fish of
the June-bug order, and then sticking pins through
’em and calling ’em names.
He and May Martha were the whole family.
He prized her highly as a fine specimen of the racibus
humanus because she saw that he had food at times,
and put his clothes on right side before, and kept
his alcohol-bottles filled. Scientists, they say,
are apt to be absent-minded.
There was another besides myself who
thought May Martha Mangum one to be desired.
That was Goodloe Banks, a young man just home from
college. He had all the attainments to be found
in books Latin, Greek, philosophy, and
especially the higher branches of mathematics and logic.
If it hadn’t been for his habit
of pouring out this information and learning on every
one that he addressed, I’d have liked him pretty
well. But, even as it was, he and I were, you
would have thought, great pals.
We got together every time we could
because each of us wanted to pump the other for whatever
straws we could to find which way the wind blew from
the heart of May Martha Mangum rather a
mixed metaphor; Goodloe Banks would never have been
guilty of that. That is the way of rivals.
You might say that Goodloe ran to
books, manners, culture, rowing, intellect, and clothes.
I would have put you in mind more of baseball and
Friday-night debating societies by way of
culture and maybe of a good horseback rider.
But in our talks together, and in
our visits and conversation with May Martha, neither
Goodloe Banks nor I could find out which one of us
she preferred. May Martha was a natural-born
non-committal, and knew in her cradle how to keep
people guessing.
As I said, old man Mangum was absent-minded.
After a long time he found out one day a
little butterfly must have told him that
two young men were trying to throw a net over the
head of the young person, a daughter, or some such
technical appendage, who looked after his comforts.
I never knew scientists could rise
to such occasions. Old Mangum orally labelled
and classified Goodloe and myself easily among the
lowest orders of the vertebrates; and in English,
too, without going any further into Latin than the
simple references to Orgetorix, Rex Helvetii which
is as far as I ever went, myself. And he told
us that if he ever caught us around his house again
he would add us to his collection.
Goodloe Banks and I remained away
five days, expecting the storm to subside. When
we dared to call at the house again May Martha Mangum
and her father were gone. Gone! The house
they had rented was closed. Their little store
of goods and chattels was gone also.
And not a word of farewell to either
of us from May Martha not a white, fluttering
note pinned to the hawthorn-bush; not a chalk-mark
on the gate-post nor a post-card in the post-office
to give us a clew.
For two months Goodloe Banks and I separately tried
every scheme we could think of to track the runaways.
We used our friendship and influence with the ticket-agent,
with livery-stable men, railroad conductors, and our
one lone, lorn constable, but without results.
Then we became better friends and
worse enemies than ever. We forgathered in the
back room of Snyder’s saloon every afternoon
after work, and played dominoes, and laid conversational
traps to find out from each other if anything had
been discovered. That is the way of rivals.
Now, Goodloe Banks had a sarcastic
way of displaying his own learning and putting me
in the class that was reading “Poor Jane Ray,
her bird is dead, she cannot play.” Well,
I rather liked Goodloe, and I had a contempt for his
college learning, and I was always regarded as good-natured,
so I kept my temper. And I was trying to find
out if he knew anything about May Martha, so I endured
his society.
In talking things over one afternoon he said to me:
“Suppose you do find her, Ed,
whereby would you profit? Miss Mangum has a mind.
Perhaps it is yet uncultured, but she is destined for
higher things than you could give her. I have
talked with no one who seemed to appreciate more the
enchantment of the ancient poets and writers and the
modern cults that have assimilated and expended their
philosophy of life. Don’t you think you
are wasting your time looking for her?”
“My idea,” said I, “of
a happy home is an eight-room house in a grove of
live-oaks by the side of a charco on a Texas
prairie. A piano,” I went on, “with
an automatic player in the sitting-room, three thousand
head of cattle under fence for a starter, a buckboard
and ponies always hitched at a post for ’the
missus’ and May Martha Mangum to spend
the profits of the ranch as she pleases, and to abide
with me, and put my slippers and pipe away every day
in places where they cannot be found of evenings.
That,” said I, “is what is to be; and a
fig a dried, Smyrna, dago-stand fig for
your curriculums, cults, and philosophy.”
“She is meant for higher things,” repeated
Goodloe Banks.
“Whatever she is meant for,”
I answered, just now she is out of pocket. And
I shall find her as soon as I can without aid of the
colleges.”
“The game is blocked,”
said Goodloe, putting down a domino; and we had the
beer.
Shortly after that a young farmer
whom I knew came into town and brought me a folded
blue paper. He said his grandfather had just died.
I concealed a tear, and he went on to say that the
old man had jealously guarded this paper for twenty
years. He left it to his family as part of his
estate, the rest of which consisted of two mules and
a hypotenuse of non-arable land.
The sheet of paper was of the old,
blue kind used during the rebellion of the abolitionists
against the secessionists. It was dated June
14, 1863, and it described the hiding-place of ten
burro-loads of gold and silver coin valued at three
hundred thousand dollars. Old Rundle grandfather
of his grandson, Sam was given the information
by a Spanish priest who was in on the treasure-burying,
and who died many years before no, afterward in
old Rundle’s house. Old Rundle wrote it
down from dictation.
“Why didn’t your father
look this up?” I asked young Rundle.
“He went blind before he could do so,”
he replied.
“Why didn’t you hunt for it yourself?”
I asked.
“Well,” said he, “I’ve
only known about the paper for ten years. First
there was the spring ploughin’ to do, and then
choppin’ the weeds out of the corn; and then
come takin’ fodder; and mighty soon winter was
on us. It seemed to run along that way year after
year.”
That sounded perfectly reasonable to me, so I took
it up with young Lee
Rundle at once.
The directions on the paper were simple.
The whole burro cavalcade laden with the treasure
started from an old Spanish mission in Dolores County.
They travelled due south by the compass until they
reached the Alamito River. They forded this,
and buried the treasure on the top of a little mountain
shaped like a pack-saddle standing in a row between
two higher ones. A heap of stones marked the
place of the buried treasure. All the party except
the Spanish priest were killed by Indians a few days
later. The secret was a monopoly. It looked
good to me.
Lee Rundle suggested that we rig out
a camping outfit, hire a surveyor to run out the line
from the Spanish mission, and then spend the three
hundred thousand dollars seeing the sights in Fort
Worth. But, without being highly educated, I
knew a way to save time and expense.
We went to the State land-office and
had a practical, what they call a “working,”
sketch made of all the surveys of land from the old
mission to the Alamito River. On this map I drew
a line due southward to the river. The length
of lines of each survey and section of land was accurately
given on the sketch. By these we found the point
on the river and had a “connection” made
with it and an important, well-identified corner of
the Los Animos five-league survey a grant
made by King Philip of Spain.
By doing this we did not need to have
the line run out by a surveyor. It was a great
saving of expense and time.
So, Lee Rundle and I fitted out a
two-horse wagon team with all the accessories, and
drove a hundred and forty-nine miles to Chico, the
nearest town to the point we wished to reach.
There we picked up a deputy county surveyor.
He found the corner of the Los Animos survey for us,
ran out the five thousand seven hundred and twenty
varas west that our sketch called for, laid a
stone on the spot, had coffee and bacon, and caught
the mail-stage back to Chico.
I was pretty sure we would get that
three hundred thousand dollars. Lee Rundle’s
was to be only one-third, because I was paying all
the expenses. With that two hundred thousand
dollars I knew I could find May Martha Mangum if she
was on earth. And with it I could flutter the
butterflies in old man Mangum’s dovecot, too.
If I could find that treasure!
But Lee and I established camp.
Across the river were a dozen little mountains densely
covered by cedar-brakes, but not one shaped like a
pack-saddle. That did not deter us. Appearances
are deceptive. A pack-saddle, like beauty, may
exist only in the eye of the beholder.
I and the grandson of the treasure
examined those cedar-covered hills with the care of
a lady hunting for the wicked flea. We explored
every side, top, circumference, mean elevation, angle,
slope, and concavity of every one for two miles up
and down the river. We spent four days doing
so. Then we hitched up the roan and the dun, and
hauled the remains of the coffee and bacon the one
hundred and forty-nine miles back to Concho City.
Lee Rundle chewed much tobacco on
the return trip. I was busy driving, because
I was in a hurry.
As shortly as could be after our empty
return Goodloe Banks and I forgathered in the back
room of Snyder’s saloon to play dominoes and
fish for information. I told Goodloe about my
expedition after the buried treasure.
“If I could have found that
three hundred thousand dollars,” I said to him,
“I could have scoured and sifted the surface
of the earth to find May Martha Mangum.”
“She is meant for higher things,”
said Goodloe. “I shall find her myself.
But, tell me how you went about discovering the spot
where this unearthed increment was imprudently buried.”
I told him in the smallest detail.
I showed him the draughtsman’s sketch with the
distances marked plainly upon it.
After glancing over it in a masterly
way, he leaned back in his chair and bestowed upon
me an explosion of sardonic, superior, collegiate
laughter.
“Well, you are a fool,
Jim,” he said, when he could speak.
“It’s your play,”
said I, patiently, fingering my double-six.
“Twenty,” said Goodloe,
making two crosses on the table with his chalk.
“Why am I a fool?” I asked.
“Buried treasure has been found before in many
places.”
“Because,” said he, “in
calculating the point on the river where your line
would strike you neglected to allow for the variation.
The variation there would be nine degrees west.
Let me have your pencil.”
Goodloe Banks figured rapidly on the back of an envelope.
“The distance, from north to
south, of the line run from the Spanish mission,”
said he, “is exactly twenty-two miles. It
was run by a pocket-compass, according to your story.
Allowing for the variation, the point on the Alamito
River where you should have searched for your treasure
is exactly six miles and nine hundred and forty-five
varas farther west than the place you hit upon.
Oh, what a fool you are, Jim!”
“What is this variation that
you speak of?” I asked. “I thought
figures never lied.”
“The variation of the magnetic
compass,” said Goodloe, “from the true
meridian.”
He smiled in his superior way; and
then I saw come out in his face the singular, eager,
consuming cupidity of the seeker after buried treasure.
“Sometimes,” he said with
the air of the oracle, “these old traditions
of hidden money are not without foundation. Suppose
you let me look over that paper describing the location.
Perhaps together we might ”
The result was that Goodloe Banks
and I, rivals in love, became companions in adventure.
We went to Chico by stage from Huntersburg, the nearest
railroad town. In Chico we hired a team drawing
a covered spring-wagon and camping paraphernalia.
We had the same surveyor run out our distance, as
revised by Goodloe and his variations, and then dismissed
him and sent him on his homeward road.
It was night when we arrived.
I fed the horses and made a fire near the bank of
the river and cooked supper. Goodloe would have
helped, but his education had not fitted him for practical
things.
But while I worked he cheered me with
the expression of great thoughts handed down from
the dead ones of old. He quoted some translations
from the Greek at much length.
“Anacreon,” he explained.
“That was a favorite passage with Miss Mangum as
I recited it.”
“She is meant for higher things,”
said I, repeating his phrase.
“Can there be anything higher,”
asked Goodloe, “than to dwell in the society
of the classics, to live in the atmosphere of learning
and culture? You have often decried education.
What of your wasted efforts through your ignorance
of simple mathematics? How soon would you have
found your treasure if my knowledge had not shown you
your error?”
“We’ll take a look at
those hills across the river first,” said I,
“and see what we find. I am still doubtful
about variations. I have been brought up to believe
that the needle is true to the pole.”
The next morning was a bright June
one. We were up early and had breakfast.
Goodloe was charmed. He recited Keats,
I think it was, and Kelly or Shelley while
I broiled the bacon. We were getting ready to
cross the river, which was little more than a shallow
creek there, and explore the many sharp-peaked cedar-covered
hills on the other side.
“My good Ulysses,” said
Goodloe, slapping me on the shoulder while I was washing
the tin breakfast-plates, “let me see the enchanted
document once more. I believe it gives directions
for climbing the hill shaped like a pack-saddle.
I never saw a pack-saddle. What is it like, Jim?”
“Score one against culture,”
said I. “I’ll know it when I see it.”
Goodloe was looking at old Rundle’s
document when he ripped out a most uncollegiate swear-word.
“Come here,” he said,
holding the paper up against the sunlight. “Look
at that,” he said, laying his finger against
it.
On the blue paper a thing
I had never noticed before I saw stand out
in white letters the word and figures: “Malvern,
1898.”
“What about it?” I asked.
“It’s the water-mark,”
said Goodloe. “The paper was manufactured
in 1898. The writing on the paper is dated 1863.
This is a palpable fraud.”
“Oh, I don’t know,”
said I. “The Rundles are pretty reliable,
plain, uneducated country people. Maybe the paper
manufacturers tried to perpetrate a swindle.”
And then Goodloe Banks went as wild
as his education permitted. He dropped the glasses
off his nose and glared at me.
“I’ve often told you you
were a fool,” he said. “You have let
yourself be imposed upon by a clodhopper. And
you have imposed upon me.”
“How,” I asked, “have I imposed
upon you?”
“By your ignorance,” said
he. “Twice I have discovered serious flaws
in your plans that a common-school education should
have enabled you to avoid. And,” he continued,
“I have been put to expense that I could ill
afford in pursuing this swindling quest. I am
done with it.”
I rose and pointed a large pewter
spoon at him, fresh from the dish-water.
“Goodloe Banks,” I said,
“I care not one parboiled navy bean for your
education. I always barely tolerated it in any
one, and I despised it in you. What has your
learning done for you? It is a curse to yourself
and a bore to your friends. Away,” I said “away
with your water-marks and variations! They are
nothing to me. They shall not deflect me from
the quest.”
I pointed with my spoon across the
river to a small mountain shaped like a pack-saddle.
“I am going to search that mountain,”
I went on, “for the treasure. Decide now
whether you are in it or not. If you wish to let
a water-mark or a variation shake your soul, you are
no true adventurer. Decide.”
A white cloud of dust began to rise
far down the river road. It was the mail-wagon
from Hesperus to Chico. Goodloe flagged it.
“I am done with the swindle,”
said he, sourly. “No one but a fool would
pay any attention to that paper now. Well, you
always were a fool, Jim. I leave you to your
fate.”
He gathered his personal traps, climbed
into the mail-wagon, adjusted his glasses nervously,
and flew away in a cloud of dust.
After I had washed the dishes and
staked the horses on new grass, I crossed the shallow
river and made my way slowly through the cedar-brakes
up to the top of the hill shaped like a pack-saddle.
It was a wonderful June day.
Never in my life had I seen so many birds, so many
butter-flies, dragon-flies, grasshoppers, and such
winged and stinged beasts of the air and fields.
I investigated the hill shaped like
a pack-saddle from base to summit. I found an
absolute absence of signs relating to buried treasure.
There was no pile of stones, no ancient blazes on
the trees, none of the evidences of the three hundred
thousand dollars, as set forth in the document of
old man Rundle.
I came down the hill in the cool of
the afternoon. Suddenly, out of the cedar-brake
I stepped into a beautiful green valley where a tributary
small stream ran into the Alamito River.
And there I was startled to see what
I took to be a wild man, with unkempt beard and ragged
hair, pursuing a giant butterfly with brilliant wings.
“Perhaps he is an escaped madman,”
I thought; and wondered how he had strayed so far
from seats of education and learning.
And then I took a few more steps and
saw a vine-covered cottage near the small stream.
And in a little grassy glade I saw May Martha Mangum
plucking wild flowers.
She straightened up and looked at
me. For the first time since I knew her I saw
her face which was the color of the white
keys of a new piano turn pink. I walked
toward her without a word. She let the gathered
flowers trickle slowly from her hand to the grass.
“I knew you would come, Jim,”
she said clearly. “Father wouldn’t
let me write, but I knew you would come.”
What followed you may guess there
was my wagon and team just across the river.
I’ve often wondered what good
too much education is to a man if he can’t use
it for himself. If all the benefits of it are
to go to others, where does it come in?
For May Martha Mangum abides with
me. There is an eight-room house in a live-oak
grove, and a piano with an automatic player, and a
good start toward the three thousand head of cattle
is under fence.
And when I ride home at night my pipe
and slippers are put away in places where they cannot
be found.
But who cares for that? Who cares who
cares?