It was sundown, and silent without,
except for voices and the constant movement of men.
The din of battle, the roar of guns, had ceased, and
everywhere gleamed the light of fires where the tired
commands rested. The house stood, shattered but
stanch, great gaping holes in its side, the front
a mere wreck, the lower rooms in disorder, with windows
smashed, and pools of hardening blood staining the
floors. Appearing from without a ruin, it yet
afforded shelter to the wounded.
I had had my own wounds washed and
cared for. They were numerous enough and painful an
ugly slash in the side, a broken rib, the crease of
a bullet across the temple, and a shoulder crushed
by a terrific blow, together with minor bruises from
head to heels and yet none to be considered
serious. They had carried me up the shattered
stairs to her room, and I lay there bolstered up by
soft pillows, and between clean sheets, my eyes, feverish
and wide-awake, seeking out the many little things
belonging to her scattered about, ever reminded of
what had occurred, and why I was there, by my own
ragged, stained uniform left lying upon a chair.
I could look far away out of the northern window from
where I rested, could see the black specks of moving
columns of troops beyond the orchard, the vista extending
as far as the log church, including a glimpse of the
white pike. The faint odor of near-by camp-fires
reached my nostrils, and the murmur of voices was wafted
to me on the slight breeze. Some lad was singing
not far away, although the words could not be distinguished,
and from the farther distance sounded clearly a cavalry
bugle. I could hardly realize, hardly comprehend
what it all meant. It hurt me to move, and the
fever made me half delirious. I fingered the
soft, white sheets almost with awe, and the pillows
seemed hot and smothering. Every apartment in
the house held its quota of wounded, and down below
the busy surgeons had transformed the parlor into
an operating room. In spite of my closed door
I could overhear occasionally a cry of pain.
Yet I was only conscious of wanting
one presence Billie. I could not understand
where she had gone, why she had left me. She had
been there, over in the far corner, her face hidden
in her hands, when the surgeon probed my wounds.
She had been beside me when he went out, her soft
hand brushing back my hair. I remembered looking
up at her, and seeing tears in the gray-blue eyes.
Then some one had come to the door, and, after speaking,
she came back to me, kissed me, said something softly,
and went out, leaving me alone. I could not recall
what it was she said. That must have been an
hour, maybe two hours, ago, for it was already growing
dusk. I do not know whether I thought or dreamed,
but I seemed to live over again all the events of
the past few days. Every incident came before
me in vividness of coloring, causing my nerves to throb.
I was riding with Billie through the early morning,
and seeing her face for the first time with the sunlight
reflected in her smiling eyes; I was facing Grant,
receiving orders; I was struggling with Le Gaire, his
olive face vindictive and cruel; I was with Billie
again, hearing her voice, tantalized by her coquetry;
then I was searching for Le Gaire’s murderer,
and in the fight, slashing madly at the faces fronting
me. It must have been delirium, the wild fantasy
of fever, for it was all so real, leaving me staring
about half crazed, every nerve throbbing. Then
I sank back dazed and tired, sobbing from the reaction,
all life apparently departed from the brain.
I could not realize where I was, or how I got there,
and a memory of mother came gliding in to take Billie’s
place. I was in the old room at home, the old
room with the oak tree before the window, and father’s
picture upon the wall at the foot of the bed.
I thought it was mother when she came in, and it was
the touch of mother’s hand that fell so soft
and tender upon my temple, soothing the hot pain.
Gradually the mists seemed to drift away, and I saw
the gray-blue eyes, and Billie.
She was kneeling there beside me clasping
one of my hands, and she looked so happy, the old,
girlish smile upon her lips.
“You have been away so long,”
I began petulantly, but she interrupted,
“No, dear, scarcely fifteen
minutes, and I have had such good news. I hurried
back just to share it with you. The doctor says
you are going to get well, that all you need is nursing,
and and I have heard from father.”
I looked at her, dimly understanding,
and beginning to reflect her own happiness.
“How did you hear? Is he a prisoner?”
“Oh, no! Could I be happy
under those conditions? He is unhurt, and has
sent for me. General Johnston despatched an officer
through the lines with a flag of truce. He was
brought here, and that was why I left you. He
had a letter for me, and authority to conduct me back
to the general’s headquarters. Was not
that thoughtful of them?”
“Yes,” I answered wearily,
clinging to her hand, “and and you
are going now? You came to say good-bye?”
“You poor boy, do you really
think that? Shall I tell you what message I sent
back?”
My face must have answered, for she
lowered her head until her cheek rested against mine,
her eyes hidden.
“I I said I would stay here with
my soldier.”
I was still a long while it seemed
to me, our hands clasped, our cheeks pressing.
I could feel her soft breath, and the strands of her
hair.
“Billie, there is no regret,
no doubt any more?” I asked falteringly.
“It is all love for me?”
“All love,” she answered,
moving just enough so that our eyes met. “You
are my world forever.”
“And that uniform yonder it
is no barrier, dear? I am still a Federal officer.”
She glanced at the rags, and then back into my face.
“Sweetheart,” she whispered
gently, “I can be loyal to the South, and to
you also you must be content with that.”
Content! It was as though everything
else had been forgotten, blotted out. It was
almost dark now, and far away the camp-fires blazed
red and yellow among the trees. I lay there,
gazing out through the open window, her rounded arm
under my head, her cheek still pressed tightly against
mine. My nerves no longer throbbed, my veins no
longer pulsed with fever. She never moved; just
held me there against her, and in the silence I fell
asleep.