In the city block where I live, there
are just twenty-four houses on the other side of the
street, and twenty-four on this side, six lamp posts,
and eight ailanthus trees in green boxes. Oh,
dear me, what a tiresome row! That’s what
I thought when I first came to lodge here; for, as
I am an old bachelor, I don’t want a whole house
to myself; but now, when I sit at my window and look
out at the street, I find no end of things to amuse
and interest me; particularly when the gas is lighted
of an evening, and I can see a little way into the
parlors of the opposite neighbors. I suppose
they know that an old bachelor like Josiah Oldbird
can do no harm by looking on at their evening amusements;
so they do not pull the blinds down if they chance
to see me, sitting lonely at my window, and willing
to accept such crumbs of their society and happiness
as I can glean over the way.
First, then, is the family at N, three maiden sisters and a bachelor brother.
As I don’t in the least know their names, I have
dubbed them the Bluejays, because the three maiden
sisters always wear blue merino gowns in winter, and
blue muslin ones in summer; and because they are all
so fond of singing that no family of birds could be
more musical. They have a pet poodle and a pet
squirrel, too. The poodle is very fat, and his
hair sticks out so much all over him, that he looks
perpetually astonished, as if he had just seen a spook.
He always stands on the window sill, when the sash
is raised of an afternoon, and glares into the street
until he sees the bachelor brother coming. Then
he achieves a series of frantic yells and bounces,
until somebody comes to open the door and lets him
out, when he waddles to the front steps to meet his
master, wagging his tail to that tremendous extent,
that it looks like the shuttle of a steam power loom.
The squirrel is slim and sleek, and
seems to enjoy life amazingly, he hops about so.
When one of the Miss Bluejays takes him in her arms,
he won’t stay there, but gets away, and walks
all over her head and shoulders; and at last runs
down her back and disappears.
Then, at N, a very fat gentleman
lives with his fat and pretty wife, and round dumpling
of a baby. As I don’t know him either, I
call him Mr. Fatty, and he seems to be a “good-natured
giant.” I saw a little boy actually stop
short to stare at him the other day, when he was sitting
out at his front door he is such a regular
roly-poly of a gentleman but he only laughed
good-temperedly, and never got vexed in the least.
I don’t advise you to try this with all fat gentlemen
though; they might accidentally sit down on a chair where
you were afterward, and that would be the
last of you. This piece of advice, however, is
a great secret between you and me!
He is so glad to meet the fat baby
when he comes home at night, that I can see him in
the parlor first kissing it almost black and blue,
and then tossing it up in the air until I feel as
though its head must come bump against the ceiling,
but it doesn’t and at last, carrying
it off perched on his shoulder, and looking very much
perturbed in its spirits.
But the pleasantest neighbors of all
live exactly opposite, at N. They take tea
every evening in the back parlor; and as the front
window shades are up, and only the back room lighted,
I can always see them at their cheerful meal.
The rooms are furnished in winter with dark red velvet
carpets and furniture; with red damask curtains and
red velvet paper hangings. In summer they put
up white curtains, and carpets and furniture have
cool, cream-colored linen coverings, so that the parlors
look cozy and charming at all seasons.
As for the family there is a papa
and mamma, of course, and a dear little girl and boy.
The little girl is about ten years old, I should think,
with great, dark-blue eyes, and curling auburn hair.
Her cheeks are as rosy as ripe peaches, and her teeth
as white as so many pearls. Her nose does turn
up at the end a little, to be sure; but that is rather
saucy and becoming than otherwise; and she always looks
so sweet tempered, and full of fun, too, when I see
her of an evening, that I am sure she is as good as
pie, and as merry as a cricket! Her little brother,
who is a year or two younger, looks very much like
her, and their obedient and pretty behavior at table
is something really beautiful to observe.
It is nearly a year now, since I moved
into my lodging at “N,” and began
to wonder what N’s name was; and now I must
make haste and tell you how, only last June, I became
acquainted with these dear little neighbors of mine.
One pleasant Friday morning, after
breakfast, I put on my old-fashioned beaver hat, and
taking my gold-headed cane in one hand and my market
basket in the other, I trotted out to buy something
nice for dinner; for, you see, I am a particular old
bachelor, and like to market for myself.
Just as I was coming down the steps,
the door of N opened, and the little girl ran
down her steps. She looked so bright and
pretty in her cunning round straw hat with the blue
ribbons, and white Marseilles cloak, carrying her
satchel of books and lunch basket in her hand, that
I could not help nodding to her. So she nodded
to me, and then I nodded again and smiled,
and we each walked along on our own side of the way.
When we came to the corner I thought I would cross
over and scrape some more acquaintance with my little
neighbor. Now on the side of her satchel, I saw,
when I came near her, was printed in gold letters,
“Nelly Lawson;” so I said, as cheerily
as I could, in my old, quavering voice:
“Good morning, Neighbor Nelly!”
The little maiden looked up in my
face in a shy fashion at first; but when she saw what
a mild, gray-headed old bachelor had bade her good
morning, she took courage, and answered, “Good
morning, sir.”
“So you are going to school this fine day?”
“Yes; I go to school, but brother
Jimmy doesn’t; he learns at home. I think
he is going next year. Have you got a baby at
your house? We have.”
“No,” said I, sighing;
“I haven’t got any baby; I am an old bachelor.
Will you marry me?”
“Oh, I am too little,”
she replied quite seriously. “You will have
to wait until I grow up to you.”
I laughed, and asked her, “Don’t
you want to go to market with me before you go to
school? There is plenty of time.”
“No,” replied my little
neighbor, firmly; “I can’t go anywheres
that mamma does not know of.”
“That’s right!”
I said. “Don’t do anything your mother
would disapprove. Well, Neighbor Nelly, since
you won’t go to market with me, I must go to
school with you; and tell your mother that Neighbor
Josiah Oldbird would like you to take a walk with
him to-morrow; will you?”
“Oh yes! that would be real
nice!” said my little neighbor with a joyous
skip.
By this time we were walking along
hand in hand; and soon, seeing my little neighbor
look in at the window of the candy shop round the corner
from our street, I thought I would take her in and
buy her some candy. So in we marched, Nelly’s
great blue eyes dancing with pleased expectation,
and stood close by the counter, waiting for our turn
to come. There were a good many people in the
candy shop, and we had to wait some time; so, to amuse
ourselves, Neighbor Nelly and I turned round, and
began looking at the funny folks near us.
There was one very fat old country
woman, who seemed to be buying “quarter or pound,”
as she said, of every kind of candy in the shop.
As soon as the papers were handed to her she began
eating out of them, and before she left, I should
think, she had eaten about two pounds of candy.
Besides the old woman, there were a great many little
children, who only wanted a penny’s worth each;
but they hesitated so long whether to have “taffie”
or “molasses,” a lemon-candy horse, or
a cinnamon-candy trumpet, that they were the most
troublesome customers of anybody. Then there
were several older boys and girls; some, I am sorry
to say, picking up a loose bit of candy every time
the shopman turned away as if that were
not stealing; and finally, there was Neighbor Nelly
and I, who did none of these things, but just looked
on, and waited until the shopman came to serve us.
I bought some lemon candy, as clear
as a bit of yellow glass, and some pungent cinnamon,
and delectable chocolate; and then I popped the papers
into Neighbor Nelly’s satchel, and we hurried
on to school. We had not far to go now, and when
we came to the house, my little new friend bid me
good-by, and thanked me so sweetly, that I went away
quite a happy old bachelor.
In the evening I was looking out of
my window as usual, when I saw the servant girl come
in to light the gas in the back parlor at N, with
Neighbor Nelly and the little brother Jimmy behind
her. While she was setting the tea table, the
children came running to the window, and both nodded
and smiled at me. Presently the little boy thrust
both hands in his pockets, and held them up crammed
full of candy. “Thank you, Mr. Old Bachelor!”
he shouted; “we like you real well!”
That made me real happy; for I am
not a crabbed old bachelor by any means. In a
minute more their father came home; and as they all
sat around the pleasant tea table, I hope they talked
of their lonely old neighbor, who watched them from
his window.
The next morning, as I was reading
the paper, in came the servant and gave me the funniest
little note! It was addressed on the outside,
“To my neighbor Oldbird,” and ran thus:
“Mydear neighbor:
“Mamma
says I may take a walk with you this
morning,
because you are a good old bachelor.
Jimmy
wants to go, and Gipsey. Gipsey is my dog.
He
is black and tan, and his tail curls round so,
that
papa says you might use it for a cork-screw.
Jimmy
and I mean to try some time. Gipsey likes to
be
on the seashore, and so does baby. We are going
there
next week to Long Branch. I hope you
will
write
me a letter when I am gone, and I am
Your
affectionate
“Neighbor
Nelly.
“Saturday
Morning.”
You may believe how pleased I was
with this dear little note, and I thought I would
answer it. So I sat down at my writing desk, found
a cunning little sheet of paper, with a flag on it,
and commenced.
Now I happened to think, at that moment,
of some very comical letters written by the great
poet, Tom Hood, to his little friends on the seashore;
and as they were ever so much funnier than anything
I could have written, I copied one of them out, and
sent it to my little new friend.
“Mydear neighbor Nelly:
“I am very glad you are
to walk with me, and very sorry you are
going away so soon. Do you like to be
on the seashore? I did, when I was a boy.
I and my brother chucked hundreds of stones
into the sea, when we were there, but we
came away before we could fill it up.
Then there is the fun of finding shiny pebbles
and jelly fish on the beach. I used
to think jelly fish were made of sea-calves’
feet, and no flavoring. I suppose the mermaids
eat them at their parties.
“Then there’s fishing
on the seaside. I used to catch flat
fish sometimes, with a long string line,
it was like swimming a kite. If you go out in
a surf boat, take care it does not “flounder”
and get “squamped,” as some people
say, instead of founder and swamped.
“Have you ever been bathed
in the sea? I was, and, dear me! how
I kicked and screamed; or, at least, tried
to scream, but the sea, ships and all, began
to run into my mouth, and so I shut it up.
Remember, when you are bathing, if you meet with
a shark, the best way is to bite off his legs,
if you can, before he walks away with yours; and
pray, pray, pray take care of yourself in the sea,
for in some places, they say, it has not even a
bottom to go to.
“Could you bring me a little
crab off the beach? If you would catch
one for me, and teach it to shake hands
without nipping and biting, it would make
me quite happy, for I have not had any toys or
playthings in a long time. It would be a good
plan to hire a little crab to teach the baby
to crawl, if he can’t walk yet.
Bless him! But I must not write on
him any more; he is so soft, and I have
nothing but steel pens.
“Now good-by; give
my love to everybody, and my
compliments to all the rest, and believe
me, up
hill and down dale,
“Your affectionate
neighbor,
“Josiah
Oldbird.”
Then I put my letter in a flag envelope,
sealed it up tight, and wrote on it, “To my
dear Neighbor Nelly,” and had the maid take it
to her.
Presently I could see two little figures
flitting about in one of the upper chambers, and soon
after all four of us, Nelly, Jimmy, I, and Gipsey,
were in the street. Gipsey was a “toy terrier”
that ought to have belonged to “Commodore Nutt,”
the dwarf at “Barnum’s,” and ran
along on three legs most of the time, with the fourth,
and his cork-screw tail elevated in the air for joy
at being allowed to join the party; while the children
were all hop, skip, and jump, and kept tight hold
of a hand of mine apiece, as though they were afraid
of flying away if they let go. Meanwhile, I walked
quietly along, with my market basket on my arm, a
sober old bachelor. I expect the people who passed
us in the street thought me a rather incongruous addition
to such a frisky party; but then, you know, children
must caper about. Bless your heart! it
would never do in the world to see children mincing
solemnly along, like little old men and women; it
would be as absurd as to have my Neighbor Nelly wearing
her great-grandmother’s coal-scuttle bonnet!
The last idea struck me as so odd, that I drew a little
picture of Neighbor Nelly in this guise when I got
home, and here it is. How do you like it?
We thought we would go to market first.
So we walked slowly down Fourth Avenue, and crossed
over to the market where the Seventh Regiment armory
is, opposite the Cooper Institute.
“My cousin is a Seventh Regimenter!”
said Jimmy as we climbed up the iron steps; “he
often let us look on at his company drills last winter,
and afterward Nelly and I drilled in our yard.
The big boy who comes to see the old ladies next door,
looked over the fence and laughed at us, but we didn’t
care; and we mean to fight for our country like everything
when we are bigger; that is, I mean to, and Nelly would
like to, but she’s only a girl, you know.”
“Only a girl!” repeated
Nelly, tossing her long curls; “girls are a
great deal of use, too; I mended all his stockings
and all papa’s this week think of
that, neighbor Oldbird!”
“That was really splendid!”
said I; and just then we entered the market.
The very first thing we met was a
horrid big dog, that belonged to some butcher; and,
bless me! how he began to show his great rows of teeth,
and growl at Gipsey! Nelly gave a little scream,
and tried to hide behind me; Jimmy valiantly flew
at the big dog with my walking stick; and poor little
Gipsey nearly stood on the end of his tail with fright,
and squealed dismally. What a fuss we were all
in, to be sure! So at last, to quiet the disputants,
I caught Gipsey up, and put him in my coat pocket,
where he sat, looking out at the top, very much comforted.
Then we turned to the right, and went
by the brightest and prettiest stall in the whole
market. It was kept by a Frenchman, who, in his
own language, would be called a “charcutier;”
but Jimmy and Nell shouted out together “Oh,
there’s the pig man!” as loud as
ever they could, and then stopped, blushing very much,
because they were afraid the pork merchant heard them.
I expect he did; for he looked very funny when we
came close, and smoothing down his snowy apron with
his fat hands, said “Bonjour, mademoiselle!”
and laughed good humoredly. There was a great
“head cheese” on the pig man’s marble
counter, moulded in the shape of a boar’s head.
The tusks were made of white carrots, the eyes of red
jelly, and the sides of the dish it was on were beautifully
ornamented with white roses, cut out of turnips, and
parsley foliage. Then there were ever so many
pork pies, with the most elegant wreaths of flowers
on the top crust, comical little hams already cooked,
and fat dumplings of sucking pigs, as pink as baby
himself!
When we had looked about us a little,
we concluded to buy a pork pie of the pig man; and
while that was being nicely packed up in paper, out
popped Gipsey from my pocket, and stood triumphant
on the counter, in the midst of the little pigs and
savory pastries. I don’t know what forays
he would not have made upon them, if he had not been
captured by the pig man, Jimmy, and me; but he did
contrive to jump right into the very middle of another
pork-pie! and then we had to pay for that, too; and
wipe the gravy off Gipsey’s feet and the ends
of his tail and nose, and button him up tight in the
market basket for half an hour, as a punishment for
his naughtiness. As to the pie we had bought,
Jimmy carried that, and Gipsey cut up so many antics
inside the basket, that he nearly wriggled it out
of my hand altogether.
After that we went on, and found,
dear me! such a comfortable old market woman, who
sold us a nice little chicken, and some fresh vegetables,
and gave the children each a great handful of cherries;
but we had to tell her to send them home, with our
pie, because Gipsey had the basket in possession.
Then we walked into the street again,
and when we had let Gipsey out of prison, concluded
to leave the basket at my baker’s, and take a
walk in Broadway. Dear, dear me! what quantities
of shop windows there were to stare into, and how
we flattened our three noses, and spread our six hands
all over every one of them, while we admired the splendid
picture books, the stores of sugar plums, or the wonders
of toys they contained! While we were occupied
in this way, a little girl, poorly dressed, and lugging
a large bundle of work in both arms, came along, and
stopping beside us at the window of the most splendid
toy shop, stood looking wistfully in.
Neighbor Nelly straightway twitched
my hand, and whispered, “Oh look, Neighbor Oldbird!
what a poor little girl! I don’t suppose
she ever saw a doll before in her life. How she
must wish she had one!”
“Suppose we ask her?” I said.
“Will you ask?” she answered; “I
don’t like to.”
“Nonsense! ask her yourself;
she won’t eat you, or Gipsey either;” for
Gipsey was sidling away between my feet, as if he were
alarmed too; the saucy scamp!
Thereupon Nelly moved closer to the
poor girl, and said, in a kind, little, timid voice,
“Do you like dolls?”
“Yes, very much!” said the child, with
a surprised look.
“Oh, so do I!” cried Nelly,
rapturously. “I have lots of them at home;
let me see, there’s Jenny, and Willie, and old
black Nanny, and ” she stopped short,
seeing the other look wistfully at her, and then said,
“Oh, I forgot! you have none, perhaps; would
you like to have one?”
“Oh yes, miss!” said the
child; “not so much for myself, though, as my
little sister; she is sick, and can’t do anything,
poor Clara! but I work, and help my mother!”
she added, proudly.
“What does your mother do?” asked Jimmy.
“She makes shirts for the army; and I do all
the button holes.”
“I can’t make a button hole,” said
Nelly, regretfully.
Here I proposed we should walk into
the shop, and after we had looked all we wanted to
at the pretty things, and the children, with screams
of delight, had ridden in turn on a “spring
rocking horse,” that sent them flying half way
to the top of the glass cases behind the counter, I
gave Jimmy and Nelly each two shillings, and told
them to buy whatever the little girl would like best.
The poor little thing’s eyes sparkled with happiness
when Nelly bought her the composition doll she chose
out of a heap that were piled in a great basket, gorgeously
dressed in pink mosquito netting, as I thought, but
which Nelly informed me was a “tarletane;”
and Jimmy laid out his money on a tiny bowl and pitcher
of sprigged china ware, and an astonished china baby
sitting in a bath, and looking as if it had turned
on the hot water, and couldn’t turn it off again.
Then we trundled Gipsey about a little
in a wicker wagon we found, and put him in the patent
baby-jumper to take an airing; and at last, when we
had teased him till he barked like one of the toy poodles
on the shelves, we took ourselves off, and sent the
poor child on her way rejoicing.
But it was getting late, and time
to trot home, before His Majesty the Sun roasted us
all like so many eggs. Our street is always shady
and cool, it seems to me, and we were glad enough
to find ourselves once more on its pavement.
I invited Nelly and Jimmy and Gipsey all to take lunch
with me, and didn’t we have fun! We ate
the pork pie, and stuffed Gipsey with lumps of sugar,
and discovered a pot of raspberry jam in the closet,
and ornamented ourselves with red rims round our mouths,
digging it out; and sliced, and buttered, and disposed
of almost half a loaf of French bread, and hardly
stopped laughing, chattering, and barking a single
minute.
And then, after all this was over,
my little neighbors bid me good-by, and Gipsey barked
at me and poked his cold nose into my hand, which
meant “Good-by and thank you,” all the
same, and the three went home as merry as crickets.
I could not see much of my little
neighbors before they went away the next Tuesday,
but I was invited to take tea at N the very last
evening; and then, what should I find out but that
Nelly’s mamma was the daughter of an old friend
of mine whom I had not seen for years! So we
felt quite like relations right away. Just as
tea was over, lo and behold! there was a tremendous
hullaballoo on the back piazza, and when we poked
our heads out of the window to see what the matter
was, there was Gipsey high and dry on the back of
Miss Bluejay’s fat poodle having
squeezed through the railing which separated the two
piazzas with the squirrel, which had come
to the rescue of his friend, hanging on to his tail!
and all three setting up a squeal of remonstrance.
Gipsey’s plight was so extremely well deserved,
that we wouldn’t go to his rescue; but at last,
with a tremendous twist, he snatched away his cork-screw
tail, and ran to hide himself and his injured feelings
under the sofa in the front room. How we laughed
at him! and how Nelly tried to make him come out and
be lump-sugared into good humor, but he wouldn’t;
so, to make up, we coaxed the fat poodle, which had
been staring in at the performance and sniffing satisfaction,
to sit up and beg for us until we gave him the lump
of sugar. Then Mrs. Lawson sat down to the piano,
and began playing a funny little hornpipe tune that
sounded just like a banjo; and, to our astonishment,
the fat poodle developed another accomplishment; for,
getting on his hind legs, he gravely hopped up and
down on the piazza, keeping time to the music, until
we nearly died of laughter.
You may fancy, after all these comical
doings, that we managed to spend a merry evening,
and when I at last bid my neighbors good night, it
was no longer with the feeling that I was a lonely
old bachelor.
I did find the street pretty lonely
though, after they had gone, next day, with two great
big trunks strapped on behind the carriage, a middling
sized trunk hoisted up in front, and several small
carpet bags, and tiny tawny bundles and baskets in
every place where room could be found. I fancy
Gipsey was in one of the baskets, by the way it bounced
and wriggled about in Neighbor Nelly’s lap; but
I don’t know; I only saw it from my window,
whence I waved an adieu to them as they rolled away.
A few days after they had gone, I
thought I would amuse myself, in their absence, by
trying to find out if any of the other neighbors knew
anything about my neighbor, Nelly. I succeeded
in learning what two of them knew, and they shall
tell it for themselves in the stories that follow,
and which I have written out. And now, if any
other dear little children have been pleased with
me, in what I have told of my walks and talks with
Neighbor Nelly, just let them come to N, and meet
the hearty greeting and loving welcome of the
Oldbachelor!