She tried to be content, which
was a contradiction in terms. She fanatically
cleaned house all April. She knitted a sweater
for Hugh. She was diligent at Red Cross work.
She was silent when Vida raved that though America
hated war as much as ever, we must invade Germany and
wipe out every man, because it was now proven that
there was no soldier in the German army who was not
crucifying prisoners and cutting off babies’
hands.
Carol was volunteer nurse when Mrs.
Champ Perry suddenly died of pneumonia.
In her funeral procession were the
eleven people left out of the Grand Army and the Territorial
Pioneers, old men and women, very old and weak, who
a few decades ago had been boys and girls of the frontier,
riding broncos through the rank windy grass of this
prairie. They hobbled behind a band made up of
business men and high-school boys, who straggled along
without uniforms or ranks or leader, trying to play
Chopin’s Funeral March — a shabby group
of neighbors with grave eyes, stumbling through the
slush under a solemnity of faltering music.
Champ was broken. His rheumatism
was worse. The rooms over the store were silent.
He could not do his work as buyer at the elevator.
Farmers coming in with sled-loads of wheat complained
that Champ could not read the scale, that he seemed
always to be watching some one back in the darkness
of the bins. He was seen slipping through alleys,
talking to himself, trying to avoid observation, creeping
at last to the cemetery. Once Carol followed
him and found the coarse, tobacco-stained, unimaginative
old man lying on the snow of the grave, his thick arms
spread out across the raw mound as if to protect her
from the cold, her whom he had carefully covered up
every night for sixty years, who was alone there now,
uncared for.
The elevator company, Ezra Stowbody
president, let him go. The company, Ezra explained
to Carol, had no funds for giving pensions.
She tried to have him appointed to
the postmastership, which, since all the work was
done by assistants, was the one sinecure in town, the
one reward for political purity. But it proved
that Mr. Bert Tybee, the former bartender, desired
the postmastership.
At her solicitation Lyman Cass gave
Champ a warm berth as night watchman. Small boys
played a good many tricks on Champ when he fell asleep
at the mill.
II
She had vicarious happiness in the
return of Major Raymond Wutherspoon. He was well,
but still weak from having been gassed; he had been
discharged and he came home as the first of the war
veterans. It was rumored that he surprised Vida
by coming unannounced, that Vida fainted when she
saw him, and for a night and day would not share him
with the town. When Carol saw them Vida was hazy
about everything except Raymie, and never went so
far from him that she could not slip her hand under
his. Without understanding why Carol was troubled
by this intensity. And Raymie — surely
this was not Raymie, but a sterner brother of his,
this man with the tight blouse, the shoulder emblems,
the trim legs in boots. His face seemed different,
his lips more tight. He was not Raymie; he was
Major Wutherspoon; and Kennicott and Carol were grateful
when he divulged that Paris wasn’t half as pretty
as Minneapolis, that all of the American soldiers
had been distinguished by their morality when on leave.
Kennicott was respectful as he inquired whether the
Germans had good aeroplanes, and what a salient was,
and a cootie, and Going West.
In a week Major Wutherspoon was made
full manager of the Bon Ton. Harry Haydock was
going to devote himself to the half-dozen branch stores
which he was establishing at crossroads hamlets.
Harry would be the town’s rich man in the coming
generation, and Major Wutherspoon would rise with
him, and Vida was jubilant, though she was regretful
at having to give up most of her Red Cross work.
Ray still needed nursing, she explained.
When Carol saw him with his uniform
off, in a pepper-and salt suit and a new gray felt
hat, she was disappointed. He was not Major Wutherspoon;
he was Raymie.
For a month small boys followed him
down the street, and everybody called him Major, but
that was presently shortened to Maje, and the small
boys did not look up from their marbles as he went
by.
III
The town was booming, as a result
of the war price of wheat.
The wheat money did not remain in
the pockets of the farmers; the towns existed to take
care of all that. Iowa farmers were selling their
land at four hundred dollars an acre and coming into
Minnesota. But whoever bought or sold or mortgaged,
the townsmen invited themselves to the feast — millers,
real-estate men, lawyers, merchants, and Dr. Will
Kennicott. They bought land at a hundred and fifty,
sold it next day at a hundred and seventy, and bought
again. In three months Kennicott made seven thousand
dollars, which was rather more than four times as much
as society paid him for healing the sick.
In early summer began a “campaign
of boosting.” The Commercial Club decided
that Gopher Prairie was not only a wheat-center but
also the perfect site for factories, summer cottages,
and state institutions. In charge of the campaign
was Mr. James Blausser, who had recently come to town
to speculate in land. Mr. Blausser was known as
a Hustler. He liked to be called Honest Jim.
He was a bulky, gauche, noisy, humorous man, with
narrow eyes, a rustic complexion, large red hands,
and brilliant clothes. He was attentive to all
women. He was the first man in town who had not
been sensitive enough to feel Carol’s aloofness.
He put his arm about her shoulder while he condescended
to Kennicott, “Nice lil wifey, I’ll say,
doc,” and when she answered, not warmly, “Thank
you very much for the imprimatur,” he blew on
her neck, and did not know that he had been insulted.
He was a layer-on of hands. He
never came to the house without trying to paw her.
He touched her arm, let his fist brush her side.
She hated the man, and she was afraid of him.
She wondered if he had heard of Erik, and was taking
advantage. She spoke ill of him at home and in
public places, but Kennicott and the other powers
insisted, “Maybe he is kind of a roughneck,
but you got to hand it to him; he’s got more
git-up-and-git than any fellow that ever hit this burg.
And he’s pretty cute, too. Hear what he
said to old Ezra? Chucked him in the ribs and
said, ’Say, boy, what do you want to go to Denver
for? Wait ’ll I get time and I’ll
move the mountains here. Any mountain will be
tickled to death to locate here once we get the White
Way in!’”
The town welcomed Mr. Blausser as
fully as Carol snubbed him. He was the guest
of honor at the Commercial Club Banquet at the Minniemashie
House, an occasion for menus printed in gold (but
injudiciously proof-read), for free cigars, soft damp
slabs of Lake Superior whitefish served as fillet
of sole, drenched cigar-ashes gradually filling the
saucers of coffee cups, and oratorical references
to Pep, Punch, Go, Vigor, Enterprise, Red Blood, He-Men,
Fair Women, God’s Country, James J. Hill, the
Blue Sky, the Green Fields, the Bountiful Harvest,
Increasing Population, Fair Return on Investments,
Alien Agitators Who Threaten the Security of Our Institutions,
the Hearthstone the Foundation of the State, Senator
Knute Nelson, One Hundred Per Cent. Americanism,
and Pointing with Pride.
Harry Haydock, as chairman, introduced
Honest Jim Blausser. “And I am proud to
say, my fellow citizens, that in his brief stay here
Mr. Blausser has become my warm personal friend as
well as my fellow booster, and I advise you all to
very carefully attend to the hints of a man who knows
how to achieve.”
Mr. Blausser reared up like an elephant
with a camel’s neck — red faced, red
eyed, heavy fisted, slightly belching — a
born leader, divinely intended to be a congressman
but deflected to the more lucrative honors of real-estate.
He smiled on his warm personal friends and fellow
boosters, and boomed:
“I certainly was astonished
in the streets of our lovely little city, the other
day. I met the meanest kind of critter that God
ever made — meaner than the horned toad or
the Texas lallapaluza! (Laughter.) And do you know
what the animile was? He was a knocker! (Laughter
and applause.)
“I want to tell you good people,
and it’s just as sure as God made little apples,
the thing that distinguishes our American commonwealth
from the pikers and tin-horns in other countries is
our Punch. You take a genuwine, honest-to-God
homo Americanibus and there ain’t anything he’s
afraid to tackle. Snap and speed are his middle
name! He’ll put her across if he has to
ride from hell to breakfast, and believe me, I’m
mighty good and sorry for the boob that’s so
unlucky as to get in his way, because that poor slob
is going to wonder where he was at when Old Mr. Cyclone
hit town! (Laughter.)
“Now, frien’s, there’s
some folks so yellow and small and so few in the pod
that they go to work and claim that those of us that
have the big vision are off our trolleys. They
say we can’t make Gopher Prairie, God bless
her! just as big as Minneapolis or St. Paul or Duluth.
But lemme tell you right here and now that there
ain’t a town under the blue canopy of heaven
that’s got a better chance to take a running
jump and go scooting right up into the two-hundred-thousand
class than little old G. P.! And if there’s
anybody that’s got such cold kismets that he’s
afraid to tag after Jim Blausser on the Big Going Up,
then we don’t want him here! Way I figger
it, you folks are just patriotic enough so that you
ain’t going to stand for any guy sneering and
knocking his own town, no matter how much of a smart
Aleck he is — and just on the side I want
to add that this Farmers’ Nonpartisan League
and the whole bunch of socialists are right in the
same category, or, as the fellow says, in the same
scategory, meaning This Way Out, Exit, Beat It While
the Going’s Good, This Means You, for all knockers
of prosperity and the rights of property!
“Fellow citizens, there’s
a lot of folks, even right here in this fair state,
fairest and richest of all the glorious union, that
stand up on their hind legs and claim that the East
and Europe put it all over the golden Northwestland.
Now let me nail that lie right here and now.
‘Ah-ha,’ says they, ’so Jim Blausser
is claiming that Gopher Prairie is as good a place
to live in as London and Rome and — and all
the rest of the Big Burgs, is he? How does the
poor fish know?’ says they. Well I’ll
tell you how I know! I’ve seen ’em!
I’ve done Europe from soup to nuts! They
can’t spring that stuff on Jim Blausser and get
away with it! And let me tell you that the only
live thing in Europe is our boys that are fighting
there now! London — I spent three days,
sixteen straight hours a day, giving London the once-over,
and let me tell you that it’s nothing but a
bunch of fog and out-of-date buildings that no live
American burg would stand for one minute. You
may not believe it, but there ain’t one first-class
skyscraper in the whole works. And the same thing
goes for that crowd of crabs and snobs Down East,
and next time you hear some zob from Yahooville-on-the-Hudson
chewing the rag and bulling and trying to get your
goat, you tell him that no two-fisted enterprising
Westerner would have New York for a gift!
“Now the point of this is:
I’m not only insisting that Gopher Prairie is
going to be Minnesota’s pride, the brightest
ray in the glory of the North Star State, but also
and furthermore that it is right now, and still more
shall be, as good a place to live in, and love in,
and bring up the Little Ones in, and it’s got
as much refinement and culture, as any burg on the
whole bloomin’ expanse of God’s Green Footstool,
and that goes, get me, that goes!”
Half an hour later Chairman Haydock
moved a vote of thanks to Mr. Blausser.
The boosters’ campaign was on.
The town sought that efficient and
modern variety of fame which is known as “publicity.”
The band was reorganized, and provided by the Commercial
Club with uniforms of purple and gold. The amateur
baseball-team hired a semi-professional pitcher from
Des Moines, and made a schedule of games
with every town for fifty miles about. The citizens
accompanied it as “rooters,” in a special
car, with banners lettered “Watch Gopher Prairie
Grow,” and with the band playing “Smile,
Smile, Smile.” Whether the team won or
lost the Dauntless loyally shrieked, “Boost,
Boys, and Boost Together — Put Gopher Prairie
on the Map — Brilliant Record of Our Matchless
Team.”
Then, glory of glories, the town put
in a White Way. White Ways were in fashion in
the Middlewest. They were composed of ornamented
posts with clusters of high-powered electric lights
along two or three blocks on Main Street. The
Dauntless confessed: “White Way Is Installed — Town
Lit Up Like Broadway — Speech by Hon. James
Blausser — Come On You Twin Cities — Our
Hat Is In the Ring.”
The Commercial Club issued a booklet
prepared by a great and expensive literary person
from a Minneapolis advertising agency, a red-headed
young man who smoked cigarettes in a long amber holder.
Carol read the booklet with a certain wonder.
She learned that Plover and Minniemashie Lakes were
world-famed for their beauteous wooded shores and gamey
pike and bass not to be equalled elsewhere in the
entire country; that the residences of Gopher Prairie
were models of dignity, comfort, and culture, with
lawns and gardens known far and wide; that the Gopher
Prairie schools and public library, in its neat and
commodious building, were celebrated throughout the
state; that the Gopher Prairie mills made the best
flour in the country; that the surrounding farm lands
were renowned, where’er men ate bread and butter,
for their incomparable N Hard Wheat and Holstein-Friesian
cattle; and that the stores in Gopher Prairie compared
favorably with Minneapolis and Chicago in their abundance
of luxuries and necessities and the ever-courteous
attention of the skilled clerks. She learned,
in brief, that this was the one Logical Location for
factories and wholesale houses.
“There’s where I
want to go; to that model town Gopher Prairie,”
said Carol.
Kennicott was triumphant when the
Commercial Club did capture one small shy factory
which planned to make wooden automobile-wheels, but
when Carol saw the promoter she could not feel that
his coming much mattered — and a year after,
when he failed, she could not be very sorrowful.
Retired farmers were moving into town.
The price of lots had increased a third. But
Carol could discover no more pictures nor interesting
food nor gracious voices nor amusing conversation
nor questing minds. She could, she asserted,
endure a shabby but modest town; the town shabby and
egomaniac she could not endure. She could nurse
Champ Perry, and warm to the neighborliness of Sam
Clark, but she could not sit applauding Honest Jim
Blausser. Kennicott had begged her, in courtship
days, to convert the town to beauty. If it was
now as beautiful as Mr. Blausser and the Dauntless
said, then her work was over, and she could go.