The arrival of this letter, coming
after a week of silence and after she had had a chance
to think, moved Jennie deeply. What did she want
to do? What ought she to do? How did she
truly feel about this man? Did she sincerely
wish to answer his letter? If she did so, what
should she say? Heretofore all her movements,
even the one in which she had sought to sacrifice
herself for the sake of Bass in Columbus, had not
seemed to involve any one but herself. Now, there
seemed to be others to consider-her family,
above all, her child. The little Vesta was now
eighteen months of age; she was an interesting child;
her large, blue eyes and light hair giving promise
of a comeliness which would closely approximate that
of her mother, while her mential traits indicated
a clear and intelligent mind. Mrs. Gerhardt had
become very fond of her. Gerhardt had unbended
so gradually that his interest was not even yet clearly
discernible, but he had a distinct feeling of kindliness
toward her. And this readjustment of her father’s
attitude had aroused in Jennie an ardent desire to
so conduct herself that no pain should ever come to
him again. Any new folly on her part would not
only be base ingratitude to her father, but would
tend to injure the prospects of her little one.
Her life was a failure, she fancied, but Vesta’s
was a thing apart; she must do nothing to spoil it.
She wondered whether it would not be better to write
Lester and explain everything. She had told him
that she did not wish to do wrong. Suppose she
went on to inform him that she had a child, and beg
him to leave her in peace. Would he obey her?
She doubted it. Did she really want him to take
her at her word?
The need of making this confession
was a painful thing to Jennie. It caused her
to hesitate, to start a letter in which she tried to
explain, and then to tear it up. Finally, fate
intervened in the sudden home-coming of her father,
who had been seriously injured by an accident at the
glass-works in Youngstown where he worked.
It was on a Wednesday afternoon, in
the latter part of August, when a letter came from
Gerhardt. But instead of the customary fatherly
communication, written in German and inclosing the
regular weekly remittance of five dollars, there was
only a brief note, written by another hand, and explaining
that the day before Gerhardt had received a severe
burn on both hands, due to the accidental overturning
of a dipper of molten glass. The letter added
that he would be home the next morning.
“What do you think of that?”
exclaimed William, his mouth wide open.
“Poor papa!” said Veronica,
tears welling up in her eyes.
Mrs. Gerhardt sat down, clasped her
hands in her lap, and stared at the floor. “Now,
what to do?” she nervously exclaimed. The
possibility that Gerhardt was disabled for life opened
long vistas of difficulties which she had not the
courage to contemplate.
Bass came home at half-past six and
Jennie at eight. The former heard the news with
an astonished face.
“Gee! that’s tough, isn’t
it?” he exclaimed. “Did the letter
say how bad he was hurt?”
“No,” replied Mrs. Gerhardt.
“Well, I wouldn’t worry
about it,” said Bass easily. “It won’t
do any good. We’ll get along somehow.
I wouldn’t worry like that if I were you.”
The truth was, he wouldn’t,
because his nature was wholly different. Life
did not rest heavily upon his shoulders. His brain
was not large enough to grasp the significance and
weigh the results of things.
“I know,” said Mrs. Gerhardt,
endeavoring to recover herself. “I can’t
help it, though. To think that just when we were
getting along fairly well this new calamity should
be added. It seems sometimes as if we were under
a curse. We have so much bad luck.”
When Jennie came her mother turned
to her instinctively; here was her one stay.
“What’s the matter, ma?”
asked Jennie as she opened the door and observed her
mother’s face. “What have you been
crying about?”
Mrs. Gerhardt looked at her, and then turned half
away.
“Pa’s had his hands burned,”
put in Bass solemnly. “He’ll be home
to-morrow.”
Jennie turned and stared at him.
“His hands burned!” she exclaimed.
“Yes,” said Bass.
“How did it happen?”
“A pot of glass was turned over.”
Jennie looked at her mother, and her
eyes dimmed with tears. Instinctively she ran
to her and put her arms around her.
“Now, don’t you cry, ma,”
she said, barely able to control herself. “Don’t
you worry. I know how you feel, but we’ll
get along. Don’t cry now.” Then
her own lips lost their evenness, and she struggled
long before she could pluck up courage to contemplate
this new disaster. And now without volition upon
her part there leaped into her consciousness a new
and subtly persistent thought. What about Lester’s
offer of assistance now? What about his declaration
of love? Somehow it came back to her-his
affection, his personality, his desire to help her,
his sympathy, so like that which Brander had shown
when Bass was in jail. Was she doomed to a second
sacrifice? Did it really make any difference?
Wasn’t her life a failure already? She thought
this over as she looked at her mother sitting there
so silent, haggard, and distraught. “What
a pity,” she thought, “that her mother
must always suffer! Wasn’t it a shame that
she could never have any real happiness?”
“I wouldn’t feel so badly,”
she said, after a time. “Maybe pa isn’t
burned so badly as we think. Did the letter say
he’d be home in the morning?”
“Yes,” said Mrs. Gerhardt, recovering
herself.
They talked more quietly from now
on, and gradually, as the details were exhausted,
a kind of dumb peace settled down upon the household.
“One of us ought to go to the
train to meet him in the morning,” said Jennie
to Bass. “I will. I guess Mrs. Bracebridge
won’t mind.”
“No,” said Bass gloomily, “you mustn’t.
I can go.”
He was sour at this new fling of fate,
and he looked his feelings; he stalked off gloomily
to his room and shut himself in. Jennie and her
mother saw the others off to bed, and then sat out
in the kitchen talking.
“I don’t see what’s
to become of us now,” said Mrs. Gerhardt at
last, completely overcome by the financial complications
which this new calamity had brought about. She
looked so weak and helpless that Jennie could hardly
contain herself.
“Don’t worry, mamma dear,”
she said, softly, a peculiar resolve coming into her
heart. The world was wide. There was comfort
and ease in it scattered by others with a lavish hand.
Surely, surely misfortune could not press so sharply
but that they could live!
She sat down with her mother, the
difficulties of the future seeming to approach with
audible and ghastly steps.
“What do you suppose will become
of us now?” repeated her mother, who saw how
her fanciful conception of this Cleveland home had
crumbled before her eyes.
“Why,” said Jennie, who
saw clearly and knew what could be done, “it
will be all right. I wouldn’t worry about
it. Something will happen. We’ll get
something.”
She realized, as she sat there, that
fate had shifted the burden of the situation to her.
She must sacrifice herself; there was no other way.
Bass met his father at the railway
station in the morning. He looked very pale,
and seemed to have suffered a great deal. His
cheeks were slightly sunken and his bony profile appeared
rather gaunt. His hands were heavily bandaged,
and altogether he presented such a picture of distress
that many stopped to look at him on the way home from
the station.
“By chops,” he said to
Bass, “that was a burn I got. I thought
once I couldn’t stand the pain any longer.
Such pain I had! Such pain! By chops!
I will never forget it.”
He related just how the accident had
occurred, and said that he did not know whether he
would ever be able to use his hands again. The
thumb on his right hand and the first two fingers on
the left had been burned to the bone. The latter
had been amputated at the first joint-the
thumb he might save, but his hands would be in danger
of being stiff.
“By chops!” he added,
“just at the time when I needed the money most.
Too bad! Too bad!”
When they reached the house, and Mrs.
Gerhardt opened the door, the old mill-worker, conscious
of her voiceless sympathy, began to cry. Mrs.
Gerhardt sobbed also. Even Bass lost control of
himself for a moment or two, but quickly recovered.
The other children wept, until Bass called a halt
on all of them.
“Don’t cry now,”
he said cheeringly. “What’s the use
of crying? It isn’t so bad as all that.
You’ll be all right again. We can get along.”
Bass’s words had a soothing
effect, temporarily, and, now that her husband was
home, Mrs. Gerhardt recovered her composure. Though
his hands were bandaged, the mere fact that he could
walk and was not otherwise injured was some consolation.
He might recover the use of his hands and be able
to undertake light work again. Anyway, they would
hope for the best.
When Jennie came home that night she
wanted to run to her father and lay the treasury of
her services and affection at his feet, but she trembled
lest he might be as cold to her as formerly.
Gerhardt, too, was troubled.
Never had he completely recovered from the shame which
his daughter had brought upon him. Although he
wanted to be kindly, his feelings were so tangled
that he hardly knew what to say or do.
“Papa,” said Jennie, approaching him timidly.
Gerhardt looked confused and tried
to say something natural, but it was unavailing.
The thought of his helplessness, the knowledge of her
sorrow and of his own responsiveness to her affection-it
was all too much for him; he broke down again and
cried helplessly.
“Forgive me, papa,” she
pleaded, “I’m so sorry. Oh, I’m
so sorry.”
He did not attempt to look at her,
but in the swirl of feeling that their meeting created
he thought that he could forgive, and he did.
“I have prayed,” he said brokenly.
“It is all right.”
When he recovered himself he felt
ashamed of his emotion, but a new relationship of
sympathy and of understanding had been established.
From that time, although there was always a great reserve
between them, Gerhardt tried not to ignore her completely,
and she endeavored to show him the simple affection
of a daughter, just as in the old days.
But while the household was again
at peace, there were other cares and burdens to be
faced. How were they to get along now with five
dollars taken from the weekly budget, and with the
cost of Gerhardt’s presence added? Bass
might have contributed more of his weekly earnings,
but he did not feel called upon to do it. And
so the small sum of nine dollars weekly must meet
as best it could the current expenses of rent, food,
and coal, to say nothing of incidentals, which now
began to press very heavily. Gerhardt had to go
to a doctor to have his hands dressed daily.
George needed a new pair of shoes. Either more
money must come from some source or the family must
beg for credit and suffer the old tortures of want.
The situation crystallized the half-formed resolve
in Jennie’s mind.
Lester’s letter had been left
unanswered. The day was drawing near. Should
she write? He would help them. Had he not
tried to force money on her? She finally decided
that it was her duty to avail herself of this proffered
assistance. She sat down and wrote him a brief
note. She would meet him as he had requested,
but he would please not come to the house. She
mailed the letter, and then waited, with mingled feelings
of trepidation and thrilling expectancy, the arrival
of the fateful day.