OR
THE FAMILY REUNION
(Komtesse Mizzi oder der Familientag)
A COMEDY IN ONE ACT
1907
PERSONS
COUNT ARPAD PAZMANDY
MIZZIE } His daughter
PRINCE EGON RAVENSTEIN
LOLO LANGHUBER
PHILIP
PROFESSOR WINDHOFER
WASNER
THE GARDENER
THE VALET
COUNTESS MIZZIE
The garden of Count Arpad.
In the background, tall iron fence. Near the
middle of this, but a little more to the right, there
is a gate. In the foreground, at the left, appears
the façade of the two-storied villa, which used to
be an imperial hunting lodge about 180 years ago and
was remodeled about thirty years ago. A narrow
terrace runs along the main floor, which is raised
above the ground. Three wide stairs lead from
the terrace down to the garden. French doors,
which are standing open, lead from the terrace into
the drawing-room. The windows of the upper floor
are of ordinary design. Above that floor appears
a small balcony, to which access is had through a
dormer window. This balcony holds a profusion
of flowering plants. A garden seat, a small table
and an armchair stand under a tree at the right, in
the foreground.
COUNT (enters from the right; he
is an elderly man with gray mustaches, but must still
be counted decidedly good-looking; his bearing and
manners indicate the retired officer; he wears a riding
suit and carries a crop)
VALET (entering behind the Count)
At what time does Your Grace desire to have dinner
to-day?
COUNT (who speaks with the laconism
affected by his former colleagues, and who, at that
particular moment, is engaged in lighting a huge cigar)
At two.
VALET
And when is the carriage to be ready, Your Grace?
MIZZIE (appearing on the balcony
with a palette and a bunch of brushes in one hand,
calls down to her father) Good morning, papa.
COUNT
Morning, Mizzie.
MIZZIE
You left me all alone for breakfast
again, papa. Where have you been anyhow?
COUNT
Most everywhere. Rode out by
way of Mauer and Rodaun. Perfectly splendid day.
And what are you doing? At work already?
Is there anything new to be seen soon?
MIZZIE
Yes, indeed, papa. Nothing but flowers though,
as usual.
COUNT
Isn’t the professor coming to see you to-day?
MIZZIE
Yes, but not until one.
COUNT
Well, don’t let me interrupt you.
MIZZIE (throws a kiss to him and
disappears from the balcony)
COUNT (to the valet)
What are you waiting for? Oh,
the carriage. I’m not going out again to-day.
Joseph can take a holiday. Or wait a moment. (He
calls up to the balcony) Say, Mizzie....
MIZZIE (reappears on the balcony)
COUNT
Sorry to disturb you again. Do
you think you’ll want the carriage to-day?
MIZZIE
No, thank you, papa. I can think
of nothing.... No, thanks. (She disappears
again)
COUNT
So Joseph can do what he pleases this
afternoon. That’s oh, see that
Franz gives the nag a good rubbing down. We got
a little excited this morning both of us.
VALET (goes out)
COUNT (sits down on the garden
seat, picks up a newspaper from the table and begins
to read)
GARDENER (enters)
Good morning, Your Grace.
COUNT
Morning, Peter. What’s up?
GARDENER
With Your Grace’s permission, I have just cut
the tea roses.
COUNT
Why all that lot?
GARDENER
The bush is full up. It ain’t
wise, Your Grace, to leave ’em on the stem much
longer. If maybe Your Grace could find some use....
COUNT
Haven’t got any. Why do
you stand there looking at me? I’m not going
to the city. I won’t need any flowers.
Why don’t you put them in some of those vases
and things that are standing about in there? Quite
the fashion nowadays, isn’t it? (He takes
the bunch of flowers from the gardener and inhales
their fragrance while he seems to be pondering something)
Wasn’t that a carriage that stopped here?
GARDENER
That’s His Highness’ pair
of blacks. I know ’em by their step.
COUNT
Thanks very much then. (He hands back the roses)
PRINCE (comes in by the gate)
COUNT (goes to meet him)
GARDENER
Good morning, Your Highness.
PRINCE
Hello, Peter.
GARDENER (goes out toward the right)
PRINCE (wears a light-colored Summer
suit; is fifty-five, but doesn’t look it; tall
and slender; his manner of speech suggests the diplomat,
who is as much at home in French as in his native tongue)
COUNT
Delighted, old chap. How goes it?
PRINCE
Thanks. Splendid day.
COUNT (offers him one of his gigantic cigars)
PRINCE
No, thank you, not before lunch.
Only one of my own cigarettes, if you permit. (He
takes a cigarette from his case and lights it)
COUNT
So you’ve found time to drop
in at last. Do you know how long you haven’t
been here? Three weeks.
PRINCE (glancing toward the balcony)
Really that long?
COUNT
What is it that makes you so scarce?
PRINCE
You mustn’t mind. But you
are right, of course. And even to-day I come
only to say good-by.
COUNT
What good-by?
PRINCE
I shall be off to-morrow.
COUNT
You’re going away? Where?
PRINCE
The sea shore. And you have you made
any plans yet?
COUNT
I haven’t given a thought to it yet this
year.
PRINCE
Well, of course, it’s wonderful
right here with your enormous park.
But you have to go somewhere later in the Summer?
COUNT
Don’t know yet. But it’s all one.
PRINCE
What’s wrong now?
COUNT
Oh, my dear old friend, it’s going downhill.
PRINCE
How? That’s a funny way
of talking, Arpad. What do you mean by downhill?
COUNT
One grows old, Egon.
PRINCE
Yes, and gets accustomed to it.
COUNT
What do you know about it you
who are five years younger?
PRINCE
Six almost. But at fifty-five
the springtime of life is pretty well over. Well one
gets resigned to it.
COUNT
You have always been something of
a philosopher, old chap.
PRINCE
Anyhow, I can’t see what’s
the matter with you. You look fine. (Seats
himself; frequently during this scene he glances up
at the balcony; pause)
COUNT (with sudden decision)
Have you heard the latest? She’s going
to marry.
PRINCE
Who’s going to marry?
COUNT
Do you have to ask? Can’t you guess?
PRINCE
Oh, I see. Thought it might be
Mizzie. And that would also.... So Lolo
is going to marry.
COUNT
She is.
PRINCE
But that’s hardly the “latest.”
COUNT
Why not?
PRINCE
It’s what she has promised,
or threatened, or whatever you choose to call it,
these last three years.
COUNT
Three, you say? May just as well
say ten. Or eighteen. Yes, indeed. In
fact, since the very start of this affair between her
and me. It has always been a fixed idea with
her. “If ever a decent man asks me to marry
him, I’ll get off the stage stante pede.”
It was almost the first thing she told me. You
have heard it yourself a couple of times. And
now he’s come the one she has been
waiting for and she’s to get married.
PRINCE
Hope he’s decent at least.
COUNT
Yes, you’re very witty!
But is that your only way of showing sympathy in a
serious moment like this?
PRINCE
Now! (He puts his hand on the Count’s arm)
COUNT
Well, I assure you, it’s a serious
moment. It’s no small matter when you have
lived twenty years with somebody in a near-marital
state; when you have been spending your best years
with her, and really shared her joys and sorrows until
you have come to think at last, that it’s never
going to end and then she comes to you one
fine day and says: “God bless you, dear,
but I’m going to get wedded on the sixteenth....”
Oh, damn the whole story! (He gets up and begins
to walk about) And I can’t blame her even.
Because I understand perfectly. So what can you
do about it?
PRINCE
You’ve always been much too kind, Arpad.
COUNT
Nothing kind about it. Why shouldn’t
I understand? The clock has struck thirty-eight
for her. And she has said adieu to her profession.
So that anybody can sympathize with her feeling that
there is no fun to go on as a ballet dancer retired
on half pay and mistress on active service to Count
Pazmandy, who’ll be nothing but an old fool either,
as time runs along. Of course, I have been prepared
for it. And I haven’t blamed her a bit ’pon
my soul!
PRINCE
So you have parted as perfect friends?
COUNT
Certainly. In fact, our leave-taking
was quite jolly. ’Pon my soul, I never
suspected at first how tough it would prove. It’s
only by degrees it has come home to me. And that’s
quite a remarkable story, I must say....
PRINCE
What’s remarkable about it?
COUNT
I suppose I had better tell you all
about it. On my way home that last time one
night last week I had a feeling all of a
sudden I don’t know how to express
it ... tremendously relieved, that’s what I felt.
Now you are a free man, I said to myself. Don’t
have to drive to Mayerhof Street every night God
grants you, merely to dine and chatter with Lolo,
or just sit there listening to her. Had come to
be pretty boresome at times, you know. And then
the drive home in the middle of the night, and, on
top of it, to be called to account when you happened
to be dining with a friend in the Casino or taking
your daughter to the opera or a theater. To cut
it short I was in high feather going home
that night. My head was full of plans already....
No, nothing of the kind you have in mind! But
plans for traveling, as I have long wanted to do to
Africa, or India, like a free man.... That is,
I should have brought my little girl along, of course....
Yes, you may well laugh at my calling her a little
girl still.
PRINCE
Nothing of the kind. Mizzie looks
exactly like a young girl. Like quite a young
one. Especially in that Florentine straw hat she
was wearing a while ago.
COUNT
Like a young girl, you say! And
yet she’s exactly of an age with Lolo.
You know, of course! Yes, we’re growing
old, Egon. Every one of us. Oh, yes....
And lonely. But really, I didn’t notice
it to begin with. It was only by degrees it got
hold of me. The first days after that farewell
feast were not so very bad. But the day before
yesterday, and yesterday, as the time approached when
I used to start for Mayerhof Street.... And when
Peter brought in those roses a moment ago for
Lolo, of course why, then it seemed pretty
plain to me that I had become a widower for the second
time in my life. Yes, my dear fellow. And
this time forever. Now comes the loneliness.
It has come already.
PRINCE
But that’s nonsense loneliness!
COUNT
Pardon me, but you can’t understand.
Your way of living has been so different from mine.
You have not let yourself be dragged into anything
new since your poor wife died ten years ago. Into
nothing of a serious nature, I mean. And besides,
you have a profession, in a sense.
PRINCE
Have I?
COUNT
Well, as a member of the Upper House.
PRINCE
Oh, I see.
COUNT
And twice you have almost been put into the cabinet.
PRINCE
Yes, almost....
COUNT
Who knows? Perhaps you will break
in some time. And I’m all done. Had
myself retired three years ago in the bargain like
a fool.
PRINCE (with a smile)
That’s why you are a free man
now. Perfectly free. With the world open
before you.
COUNT
And no desire to do a thing, old man.
That’s the whole story. Since that time
I haven’t gone to the Casino even. Do you
know what I have been doing the last few nights?
I have sat under that tree with Mizzie playing
domino.
PRINCE
Well, don’t you see? That’s
not to be lonely. When you have a daughter, and
particularly such a sensible one, with whom you have
always got on so well.... What does she say about
your staying at home nights anyhow?
COUNT
Nothing. Besides, it has happened
before, quite frequently. She says nothing at
all. And what could she say? It seems to
me she has never noticed anything. Do you think
she can have known about Lolo?
PRINCE (laughing)
Man alive!
COUNT
Of course. Yes, I know.
Of course, she must have known. But then, I was
still almost a young man when her mother died.
I hope it hasn’t hurt her feelings.
PRINCE
No, that wouldn’t. (Casually)
But being left so much alone may have troubled her
at times, I should think.
COUNT
Has she complained of me? There’s
no reason why you shouldn’t tell me.
PRINCE
I am not in her confidence. She
has never complained to me. And, heavens, it
may never have troubled her at all. She has so
long been accustomed to this quiet, retired life.
COUNT
Yes, and she seems to have a taste
for it, too. And then she used to go out a good
deal until a few years ago. Between you and me,
Egon, as late as three years ago no, two
years ago I still thought she might make
the plunge after all.
PRINCE
What plunge? Oh, I see....
COUNT
If you could only guess what kind
of men have been paying attention to her quite recently....
PRINCE
That’s only natural.
COUNT
But she won’t. She absolutely
won’t. What I mean is, that she can’t
be feeling so very lonely ... otherwise she would
... as she has had plenty of opportunity....
PRINCE
Certainly. It’s her own
choice. And then Mizzie has an additional resource
in her painting. It’s a case like that of
my blessed aunt, the late Fanny Hohenstein, who went
on writing books to a venerable old age and never
wanted to hear a word about marriage.
COUNT
It may have some connection with her
artistic aspirations. At times I’m inclined
to look for some psychological connection between all
these morbid tendencies.
PRINCE
Morbid, you say? But you can’t
possibly call Mizzie morbid.
COUNT
Oh, it’s all over now. But there was a
time....
PRINCE
I have always found Mizzie very sensible
and very well balanced. After all, painting roses
and violets doesn’t prove a person morbid by
any means.
COUNT
You don’t think me such a fool
that her violets and roses could make me believe....
But if you remember when she was still a young girl....
PRINCE
What then?
COUNT
Oh, that story at the time Fedor Wangenheim
wanted to marry her.
PRINCE
O Lord, are you still thinking of
that? Besides, there was no truth in it.
And that was eighteen or twenty years ago almost.
COUNT
Her wanting to join the Ursuline Sisters
rather than marry that nice young fellow, to whom
she was as good as engaged already and then
up and away from home all at once you might
call that morbid, don’t you think?
PRINCE
What has put you in mind of that ancient story to-day?
COUNT
Ancient, you say? I feel as if
it happened last year only. It was at the very
time when my own affair with Lolo had just begun.
Ah, harking back like that...! And if anybody
had foretold me at the time...! You know, it
really began like any ordinary adventure. In the
same reckless, crazy way. Yes, crazy that’s
it. Not that I want to make myself out worse
than I am, but it was lucky for all of us that my poor
wife had already been dead a couple of years.
Lolo seemed ... my fate. Mistress and wife at
the same time. Because she’s such a wonderful
cook, you know. And the way she makes you comfortable.
And always in good humor never a cross
word.... Well, it’s all over. Don’t
let us talk of it.... (Pause) Tell me, won’t
you stay for lunch? And I must call Mizzie.
PRINCE (checking him)
Wait I have something to
tell you. (Casually, almost facetiously) I
want you to be prepared.
COUNT
Why? For what?
PRINCE
There is a young man coming here to be introduced.
COUNT (astonished)
What? A young man?
PRINCE
If you have no objection.
COUNT
Why should I object? But who is he?
PRINCE
Dear Arpad he’s my son.
COUNT (greatly surprised)
What?
PRINCE
Yes, my son. You see, I didn’t want as
I’m going away....
COUNT
Your son? You’ve got a son?
PRINCE
I have.
COUNT
Well, did you ever...! You have
got a young man who is your son or rather,
you have got a son who is a young man. How old?
PRINCE
Seventeen.
COUNT
Seventeen! And you haven’t
told me before! No, Egon ... Egon! And
tell me ... seventeen...? My dear chap, then
your wife was still alive....
PRINCE
Yes, my wife was still alive at the
time. You see, Arpad, one gets mixed up in all
sorts of strange affairs.
COUNT
’Pon my soul, so it seems!
PRINCE
And thus, one fine day, you find yourself
having a son of seventeen with whom you go traveling.
COUNT
So it’s with him you are going away?
PRINCE
I am taking that liberty.
COUNT
No, I couldn’t possibly tell
you.... Why, he has got a son of seventeen!...
(Suddenly he grasps the hand of the Prince, and
then puts his arms about him) And if I may ask
... the mother of that young gentleman, your son ...
how it happens ... as you have started telling me....
PRINCE
She’s dead long ago. Died
a couple of weeks after he was born. A mere slip
of a girl.
COUNT
Of the common people?
PRINCE
Oh, of course. But a charming
creature. I may as well tell you everything about
it. That is, as far as I can recall it myself.
The whole story seems like a dream. And if it
were not for the boy....
COUNT
And all that you tell me only now!
To-day only just before the boy is coming
here!
PRINCE
You never can tell how a thing like
that may be received.
COUNT
Tut, tut! Received, you say...?
Did you believe perhaps ... I’m something
of a philosopher myself, after all.... And you
call yourself a friend of mine!
PRINCE
Not a soul has known it not
a single soul in the whole world.
COUNT
But you might have told me. Really,
I don’t see how you could.... Come now,
it wasn’t quite nice.
PRINCE
I wanted to wait and see how the boy
developed. You never can tell....
COUNT
Of course, with a mixed pedigree like
that.... But you seem reassured now?
PRINCE
Oh, yes, he’s a fine fellow.
COUNT (embracing him again)
And where has he been living until now?
PRINCE
His earliest years were spent a good way from Vienna in
the Tirol.
COUNT
With peasants?
PRINCE
No, with a small landowner. Then
he went to school for some time at Innsbruck.
And during the last few years I have been sending him
to the preparatory school at Krems.
COUNT
And you have seen him frequently?
PRINCE
Of course.
COUNT
And what’s his idea of it anyhow?
PRINCE
Up to a few days ago he thought that
he had lost both his parents his father
as well and that I was a friend of his dead
father.
MIZZIE (appearing on the balcony)
Good morning, Prince Egon.
PRINCE
Good morning, Mizzie.
COUNT
Well, won’t you come down a while?
MIZZIE
Oh, if I am not in the way.... (She disappears)
COUNT
And what are we going to say to Mizzie?
PRINCE
I prefer to leave that to you, of
course. But as I am adopting the boy anyhow,
and as a special decree by His Majesty will probably
enable him to assume my name in a few days ...
COUNT (surprised)
What?
PRINCE
... I think it would be wiser
to tell Mizzie the truth at once.
COUNT
Certainly, certainly and
why shouldn’t we? Seeing that you are adopting
him.... It’s really funny but,
you see, a daughter, even when she gets to be an old
maid, is nothing but a little girl to her father.
MIZZIE (appears; she is thirty-seven,
but still very attractive; wears a Florentine straw
hat and a white dress; she gives the Count a kiss
before holding out her hand to the Prince) Well,
how do you do, Prince Egon? We don’t see
much of you these days.
PRINCE
Thank you. Have you been very industrious?
MIZZIE
Painting a few flowers.
COUNT
Why so modest, Mizzie? (To the
Prince) Professor Windhofer told her recently
that she could safely exhibit. Won’t have
to fear comparison with Mrs. Wisinger-Florian herself.
MIZZIE
That’s so, perhaps. But I have no ambition
of that kind.
PRINCE
I’m rather against exhibiting,
too. It puts you at the mercy of any newspaper
scribbler.
MIZZIE
Well, how about the members of the
Upper House at least when they make speeches?
COUNT
And how about all of us? Is there
anything into which they don’t poke their noses?
PRINCE
Yes, thanks to prevailing tendencies,
there are people who would blackguard your pictures
merely because you happen to be a countess, Mizzie.
COUNT
Yes, you’re right indeed.
VALET (entering)
Your Grace is wanted on the telephone.
COUNT
Who is it? What is it about?
VALET
There is somebody who wishes to speak to Your Grace
personally.
COUNT
You’ll have to excuse me a moment.
(To the Prince, in a lowered voice) Tell her
now while I am away. I prefer it. (He
goes out followed by the valet)
MIZZIE
Somebody on the telephone do
you think papa can have fallen into new bondage already?
(She seats herself)
PRINCE
Into new bondage, you say?
MIZZIE
Lolo used always to telephone about
this time. But it’s all over with her now.
You know it, don’t you?
PRINCE
I just heard it.
MIZZIE
And what do you think of it, Prince
Egon. I am rather sorry, to tell the truth.
If he tries anything new now, I’m sure he’ll
burn his fingers. And I do fear there is something
in the air. You see, he’s still too young
for his years.
PRINCE
Yes, that’s so.
MIZZIE (turning so that she faces the Prince)
And by the way, you haven’t been here for ever
so long.
PRINCE
You haven’t missed me very much
... I fear.... Your art ... and heaven knows
what else....
MIZZIE (without affectation)
Nevertheless....
PRINCE
Awfully kind of you.... (Pause)
MIZZIE
What makes you speechless to-day?
Tell me something. Isn’t there anything
new in the world at all?
PRINCE (as if he had thought of it only that moment)
Our son has just passed his examinations for the university.
MIZZIE (slightly perturbed)
I hope you have more interesting news to relate.
PRINCE
More interesting....
MIZZIE
Or news, at least, that concerns me
more closely than the career of a strange young man.
PRINCE
I have felt obliged, however, to keep
you informed about the more important stages in the
career of this young man. When he was about to
be confirmed, I took the liberty to report the fact
to you. But, of course, we don’t have to
talk any more about it.
MIZZIE
He pulled through, I hope?
PRINCE
With honors.
MIZZIE
The stock seems to be improving.
PRINCE
Let us hope so.
MIZZIE
And now the great moment is approaching, I suppose.
PRINCE
What moment?
MIZZIE
Have you forgotten already? As
soon as he had passed his examinations, you meant
to reveal yourself as his father.
PRINCE
So I have done already.
MIZZIE
You have told him already?
PRINCE
I have.
MIZZIE (after a pause, without looking at him)
And his mother is dead...?
PRINCE
She is so far.
MIZZIE
And forever. (Rising)
PRINCE
As you please.
[The Count enters, followed by the valet.
VALET
But it was Your Grace who said that Joseph could be
free.
COUNT
Yes, yes, it’s all right.
VALET (goes out)
MIZZIE
What’s the matter, papa?
COUNT
Nothing, my girl, nothing. I
wanted to get somewhere quick and that
infernal Joseph.... If you don’t mind, Mizzie,
I want to have a few words with Egon.... (To the
Prince) Do you know, she has been trying to get
me before. I mean Lolo. But she couldn’t
get the number. And now Laura telephones oh,
well, that’s her maid, you know that
she has just started on her way here.
PRINCE
Here? To see you?
COUNT
Yes.
PRINCE
But why?
COUNT
Oh, I think I can guess. You
see, she has never put her foot in this place, of
course, and I have been promising her all the time
that she could come here once to have a look at the
house and the park before she married. Her standing
grievance has always been that I couldn’t receive
her here. On account of Mizzie, you know.
Which she has understood perfectly well. And
to sneak her in here some time when Mizzie was not
at home well, for that kind of thing I have
never had any taste. And so she sends me a telephone
message, that the marriage is set for the day after
to-morrow, and that she is on her way here now.
PRINCE
Well, what of it? She is not
coming here as your mistress, and so I can’t
see that you have any reason for embarrassment.
COUNT
But to-day of all days and
with your son due at any moment.
PRINCE
You can leave him to me.
COUNT
But I don’t want it. I’m
going to meet the carriage and see if I can stop her.
It makes me nervous. You’ll have to ask
your son to excuse me for a little while. Good-by,
Mizzie. I’ll be back right away. (He
goes out)
PRINCE
Miss Lolo has sent word that she’s
coming to call, and your papa doesn’t like it.
MIZZIE
What’s that? Has Lolo sent word? Is
she coming here?
PRINCE
Your father has been promising her
a chance to look over the place before she was married.
And now he has gone to meet the carriage in order
to steer her off.
MIZZIE
How childish! And how pathetic,
when you come to think of it! I should really
like to make her acquaintance. Don’t you
think it’s too silly? There is my father,
spending half his lifetime with a person who is probably
very attractive and I don’t get a
chance don’t have the right to
shake hands with her even. Why does he object
to it anyhow? He ought to understand that I know
all about it.
PRINCE
Oh, heavens, that’s the way
he is made. And perhaps he might not have minded
so much, if he were not expecting another visit at
this very moment....
MIZZIE
Another visit, you say?
PRINCE
For which I took the liberty to prepare him.
MIZZIE
Who is it?
PRINCE
Our son.
MIZZIE
Are you ... bringing your son here?
PRINCE
He’ll be here in half an hour at the most.
MIZZIE
I say, Prince ... this is not a joke
you’re trying to spring on me?
PRINCE
By no means. On a departed ... what an idea!
MIZZIE
Is it really true? He’s coming here?
PRINCE
Yes.
MIZZIE
Apparently you still think that nothing
but a whim keeps me from having anything to do with
the boy?
PRINCE
A whim...? No. Seeing how
consistent you have been in this matter, it would
hardly be safe for me to call it that. And when
I bear in mind how you have had the strength all these
years not even to ask any questions about him....
MIZZIE
There has been nothing admirable about
that. I have had the strength to do what was
worse ... when I had to let him be taken away ... a
week after he was born....
PRINCE
Yes, what else could you could
we have done at the time? The arrangements made
by me at the time, and approved by you in the end,
represented absolutely the most expedient thing we
could do under the circumstances.
MIZZIE
I have never questioned their expediency.
PRINCE
It was more than expedient, Mizzie.
More than our own fate was at stake. Others might
have come to grief if the truth had been revealed
at the time. My wife, with her weak heart, had
probably never survived.
MIZZIE
Oh, that weak heart....
PRINCE
And your father, Mizzie.... Think of your father!
MIZZIE
You may be sure he would have accepted
the inevitable. That was the very time when he
began his affair with Lolo. Otherwise everything
might not have come off so smoothly. Otherwise
he might have been more concerned about me. I
could never have stayed away several months if he
hadn’t found it very convenient at that particular
moment. And there was only one danger connected
with the whole story that you might be
shot dead by Fedor Wangenheim, my dear Prince.
PRINCE
Why I by him? It might have taken
another turn. You are not a believer in judgment
by ordeal, are you? And the outcome might have
proved questionable from such a point of view even.
You see, we poor mortals can never be sure how things
of that kind are regarded up above.
MIZZIE
You would never talk like that in
the Upper House supposing you ever opened
your mouth during one of its sessions.
PRINCE
Possibly not. But the fundamental
thing remains, that no amount of honesty or daring
could have availed in the least at the time. It
would have been nothing but useless cruelty toward
those nearest to us. It’s doubtful whether
a dispensation could have been obtained and
besides, the Princess would never have agreed to a
divorce which you know as well as I do.
MIZZIE
Just as if I had cared in the least for the ceremony...!
PRINCE
Oh....
MIZZIE
Not in the least. Is that new
to you? Didn’t I tell you so at the time?
Oh, you’ll never guess what might ... (her
words emphasized by her glance) what I ... of
what I might have been capable at that time. I
would have followed you anywhere everywhere even
as your mistress. I and the child. To Switzerland,
to America. After all, we could have lived wherever
it happened to suit us. And perhaps, if you had
gone away, they might never even have noticed your
absence in the Upper House.
PRINCE
Yes, of course, we might have run
away and settled down somewhere abroad.... But
do you still believe that a situation like that would
have proved agreeable in the long run, or even bearable?
MIZZIE
No, I don’t nowadays. Because,
you see, I know you now. But at that time I was
in love with you. And it is possible that I might
have gone on loving you for a long time, had you not
proved too cowardly to assume the responsibility
for what had happened.... Yes, too much of a
coward, Prince Egon.
PRINCE
Whether that be the proper word....
MIZZIE
Well, I don’t know of any other.
There was no hesitation on my part. I was ready
to face everything with joy and pride.
I was ready to be a mother, and to confess myself
the mother of our child. And you knew it, Egon.
I told you so seventeen years ago, in that little house
in the woods where you kept me hidden. But half-measures
have never appealed to me. I wanted to be a mother
in every respect or not at all. The day I had
to let the boy be taken away from me, I made up my
mind never more to trouble myself about him.
And for that reason I find it ridiculous of you to
bring him here all of a sudden. If you’ll
allow me to give you a piece of good advice, you’ll
go and meet him, as papa has gone to meet Lolo and
take him back home again.
PRINCE
I wouldn’t dream of doing so.
After what I have just had to hear from you again,
it seems settled that his mother must remain dead.
And that means that I must take still better care
of him. He is my son in the eyes of the world
too. I have adopted him.
MIZZIE
Have you...?
PRINCE
To-morrow he will probably be able
to assume my name. I shall introduce him wherever
it suits me. And of course, first of all to my
old friend your father. If you should
find the sight of him disagreeable, there will be
nothing left for you but to stay in your room while
he is here.
MIZZIE
If you believe that I think your tone
very appropriate....
PRINCE
Oh, just as appropriate as your bad temper.
MIZZIE
My bad temper...? Do I look it?
Really, if you please ... I have simply permitted
myself to find this fancy of yours in rather poor taste.
Otherwise my temper is just as good as ever.
PRINCE
I have no doubt of your good humor
under ordinary circumstances.... I am perfectly
aware, for that matter, that you have managed to become
reconciled to your fate. I, too, have managed
to submit to a fate which, in its own way, has been
no less painful than yours.
MIZZIE
In what way? To what fate have
you had to submit...? Everybody can’t become
a cabinet minister. Oh, I see ... that remark
must refer to the fact that His Highness did me the
honor ten years ago, after the blissful departure
of his noble spouse, to apply for my hand.
PRINCE
And again seven years ago, if you’ll
be kind enough to remember.
MIZZIE
Oh, yes, I do remember. Nor have
I ever given you any cause to question my good memory.
PRINCE
And I hope you have never ascribed
my proposals to anything like a desire to expiate
some kind of guilt. I asked you to become my wife
simply because of my conviction that true happiness
was to be found only by your side.
MIZZIE
True happiness!... Oh, what a mistake!
PRINCE
Yes, I do believe that it was a mistake
at that moment. Ten years ago it was probably
still too early. And so it was, perhaps, seven
years ago. But not to-day.
MIZZIE
Yes, to-day too, my dear Prince.
Your fate has been never to know me, never to understand
me at all no more when I loved you than
when I hated you, and not even during the long time
when I have been completely indifferent toward you.
PRINCE
I have always known you, Mizzie.
I know more about you than you seem able to guess.
Thus, for instance, I am not unfamiliar with the fact
that you have spent the last seventeen years in more
profitable pursuits than weeping over a man who, in
all likelihood, was not worthy of you at the time
in question. I am even aware that you have chosen
to expose yourself to several disillusionments subsequent
to the one suffered at my hands.
MIZZIE
Disillusionments, you say? Well,
for your consolation, my dear Prince, I can assure
you that some of them proved very enjoyable.
PRINCE
I know that, too. Otherwise I
should hardly have dared to call myself familiar with
the history of your life.
MIZZIE
And do you think that I am not familiar
with yours? Do you want me to present you with
a list of your mistresses? From the wife of the
Bulgarian attache in 1887 down to Mademoiselle Therese
Gredun if that be her real name who
retained the honors of her office up to last Spring
at least. It seems likely that I know more than
you even, for I can give you a practically complete
list of those with whom she has deceived you.
PRINCE
Oh, don’t, if you please.
There is no real pleasure in knowledge of that kind
when you don’t uncover it yourself.
[A carriage is heard stopping in front of the house.
PRINCE
That’s he. Do you want
to disappear before he comes out here? I can
detain him that long.
MIZZIE
Don’t trouble yourself, please.
I prefer to stay. But don’t imagine that
there is anything astir within me.... This is
nothing but a young man coming to call on my father.
There he is now.... As to blood being thicker
than water I think it’s nothing but
a fairy tale. I can’t feel anything at
all, my dear Prince.
PHILIP (comes quickly through the
main entrance; he is seventeen, slender, handsome,
elegant, but not foppish; shows a charming, though
somewhat boyish, forwardness, not quite free from embarrassment)
Good morning. (He bows to Mizzie)
PRINCE
Good morning, Philip. Countess,
will you permit me to introduce my son? This
is Countess Mizzie, daughter of the old friend of mine
in whose house you are now.
PHILIP (kisses the hand offered
him by Mizzie; brief pause)
MIZZIE
Won’t you be seated, please?
PHILIP
Thank you. Countess. (All remain standing)
PRINCE
You came in the carriage? Might
just as well send it back, as mine is here already.
PHILIP
Won’t you come back with me
instead, papa? You see, I think Wasner does a
great deal better than your Franz with his team of
ancients.
MIZZIE
So Wasner has been driving you?
PHILIP
Yes.
MIZZIE
The old man himself? Do you know
that’s a great honor? Wasner won’t
take the box for everybody. Up to about two years
ago he used to drive my father.
PHILIP
Oh....
PRINCE
You’re a little late, by the way, Philip.
PHILIP
Yes, I have to beg your pardon.
Overslept, you know. (To Mizzie) I was out
with some of my colleagues last night. You may
have heard that I passed my examinations a couple
of weeks ago, Countess. That’s why we rather
made a night of it.
MIZZIE
You seem to have caught on to our
Viennese ways pretty quickly, Mister....
PRINCE
Oh, dear Mizzie, call him Philip, please.
MIZZIE
But I think we must sit down first
of all, Philip. (With a glance at the Prince)
Papa should be here any moment now. (She and the
Prince sit down)
PHILIP (still standing)
If you permit me to say so I
think the park is magnificent. It is much finer
than ours.
MIZZIE
You are familiar with the Ravenstein park?
PHILIP
Certainly, Countess. I have been
living at Ravenstein House three days already.
MIZZIE
Is that so?
PRINCE
Of course, gardens cannot do as well
in the city as out here. Ours was probably a
great deal more beautiful a hundred years ago.
But then our place was still practically outside the
city.
PHILIP
It’s a pity that all sorts of
people have been allowed to run up houses around our
place like that.
MIZZIE
We are better off in that respect.
And we shall hardly live to see the town overtake
us.
PHILIP (affably)
But why not, Countess?
MIZZIE
A hundred years ago these grounds
were still used for hunting. The place adjoins
the Tiergarten, you know. Look over that
wall there, Philip. And our villa was a hunting
lodge once, belonging to the Empress Maria Theresa.
The stone figure over there goes back to that period.
PHILIP
And how old is our place, papa?
PRINCE (smiling)
Our place, sonny, dates back to the
seventeenth century. Didn’t I show you
the room in which Emperor Leopold spent a night?
PHILIP
Emperor Leopold, 1648 to 1705.
MIZZIE (laughs)
PHILIP
Oh, that’s an echo of the examinations.
When I get old enough.... (He interrupts himself)
I beg your pardon! What I meant to say was simply all
that stuff will be out of my head in a year. And,
of course, when I learned those dates, I didn’t
know Emperor Leopold had been such a good friend of
my own people.
MIZZIE
You seem to think your discovery enormously
funny, Philip?
PHILIP
Discovery, you say.... Well,
frankly speaking, it could hardly be called that.
(He looks at the Prince)
PRINCE
Go on, go on!
PHILIP
Well, you see, Countess, I have always
had the feeling that I was no Philip Radeiner by birth.
MIZZIE
Radeiner? (To the Prince) Oh, that was the
name...?
PRINCE
Yes.
PHILIP
And, of course, it was very pleasant
to find my suspicions confirmed but I have
really known it all the time. I can put two and
two together. And some of the other boys had also
figured out that I.... Really, Countess,
that story about Prince Ravenstein coming to Krems
merely to see how the son of his late friend was getting
along don’t you think it smacked a
little too much of story book ... Home and Family
Library, and that sort of thing? All the clever
ones felt pretty sure that I was of noble blood, and
as I was one of the cleverest....
MIZZIE
So it seems.... And what are
your plans for the future, Philip?
PHILIP
Next October I shall begin my year
as volunteer with the Sixth Dragoons, which is the
regiment in which we Ravensteins always serve.
And what’s going to happen after that whether
I stay in the army or become an archbishop in
due time, of course....
MIZZIE
That would probably be the best thing.
The Ravensteins have always been strong in the faith.
PHILIP
Yes, it’s mentioned in the Universal
History even. They were Catholic at first; then
they turned Protestant in the Thirty Years War; and
finally they became Catholic again but they
always remained strong in their faith. It was
only the faith that changed.
PRINCE
Philip, Philip!
MIZZIE
That’s the spirit of the time, Prince Egon.
PRINCE
And an inheritance from his mother.
MIZZIE
You have been working hard, your father
tells me, and have passed your examinations with honors.
PHILIP
Well, that wasn’t difficult,
Countess. I seem to get hold of things quickly.
That’s probably another result of the common
blood in me. And I had time to spare for things
not in the school curriculum such as horseback
riding and ...
MIZZIE
And what?
PHILIP
Playing the clarinet.
MIZZIE (laughing)
Why did you hesitate to tell about that?
PHILIP
Because.... Well, because everybody
laughs when I say that I play the clarinet. And
so did you, too, Countess. Isn’t that queer?
Did anybody ever laugh because you told him that you
were painting for a diversion?
MIZZIE
So you have already heard about that?
PHILIP
Yes, indeed, Countess papa
told me. And besides, there is a floral piece
in my bedroom a Chinese vase, you know,
with a laburnum branch and something purplish in color.
MIZZIE
That purplish stuff must be lilacs.
PHILIP
Oh, lilacs, of course. I saw
that at once. But I couldn’t recall the
name just now.
VALET (entering)
There is a lady who wishes to see
the Count. I have showed her into the drawing-room.
MIZZIE
A lady...? You’ll have
to excuse me for a moment, gentlemen. (She goes
out)
PHILIP
That’s all right, papa if
it’s up to me, I have no objection.
PRINCE
To what? Of what are you talking?
PHILIP
I have no objection to your choice.
PRINCE
Have you lost your senses, boy?
PHILIP
But really, papa, do you think you
can hide anything from me? That common blood
in me, you know....
PRINCE
What put such an idea into your head?
PHILIP
Now look here, papa! You have
been telling me how anxious you were to introduce
me to your old friend, the Count. And then the
Count has a daughter which I have known
all the time, by the way.... The one thing I
feared a little was that she might be too young.
PRINCE (offended, and yet unable to keep serious)
Too young, you say....
PHILIP
It was perfectly plain that you had
a certain weakness for that daughter.... Why,
you used to be quite embarrassed when talking of her.
And then you have been telling me all sorts of things
about her that you would never have cared to tell
otherwise. What interest could I have in the
pictures of a Countess X-divided-by-anything, for
instance supposing even that you could
tell her lilacs from her laburnums by their color?
And, as I said, my one fear was that she might be
too young as my mother, that is, and not
as your wife. Of course, there is not yet anybody
too young or beautiful for you. But now I can
tell you, papa, that she suits me absolutely as she
is.
PRINCE
Well, if you are not the most impudent
rogue I ever came across...! Do you really think
I would ask you, if I should ever....
PHILIP
Not exactly ask, papa ... but a happy
family life requires that all the members affect each
other sympathetically ... don’t you think so?
[Mizzie and Lolo Langhuber enter.
MIZZIE
You must look around, please.
I am sure my father would be very sorry to miss you.
(She starts to make the usual introductions)
Permit me to....
LOLO
Oh, Your Highness.
PRINCE
Well, Miss Pallestri....
LOLO
Langhuber, if you please. I have
come to thank the Count for the magnificent flowers
he sent me at my farewell performance.
PRINCE (introducing)
My son Philip. And this is Miss ...
LOLO
Charlotta Langhuber.
PRINCE (to Philip)
Better known as Miss Pallestri.
PHILIP
Oh, Miss Pallestri! Then I have already had the
pleasure....
PRINCE
What?
PHILIP
You see, I have Miss Pallestri in my collection.
PRINCE
What ... what sort of collection is that?
LOLO
There must be some kind of mistake
here, Your Highness. I can not recall....
PHILIP
Of course, you can’t, for I
don’t suppose you could feel that I was cutting
out your picture from a newspaper at Krems?
LOLO
No, thank heaven!
PHILIP
It was one of our amusements at school,
you know. There was one who cut out all the crimes
and disasters he could get hold of.
LOLO
What a dreadful fellow that must have been!
PHILIP
And there was one who went in for
historical personalities, like North Pole explorers
and composers and that kind of people. And I used
to collect theatrical ladies. Ever so much more
pleasant to look at, you know. I have got two
hundred and thirteen which I’ll show
you sometime, papa. Quite interesting, you know.
With a musical comedy star from Australia among the
rest.
LOLO
I didn’t know Your Highness
had a son and such a big one at that.
PHILIP
Yes, I have been hiding my light under a bushel so
far.
PRINCE
And now you are trying to make up for it, I should
say.
LOLO
Oh, please let him, Your Highness.
I prefer young people like him to be a little vif.
PHILIP
So you are going to retire to private
life, Miss Pallestri? That’s too bad.
Just when I might have the pleasure at last of seeing
you on those boards that signify the world....
LOLO
That’s awfully kind of Your
Highness, but unfortunately one hasn’t time
to wait for the youth that’s still growing.
And the more mature ones are beginning to find my
vintage a little out of date, I fear.
PRINCE
They say that you are about to be married.
LOLO
Yes, I am about to enter the holy state of matrimony.
PHILIP
And who is the happy man, if I may ask?
LOLO
Who is he? Why, he is waiting
outside now with that carriage.
MIZZIE
Why a coachman?
LOLO
But, Countess a coachman,
you say?! Only in the same manner as when your
papa himself beg your pardon! happens
to be taking the bay out for a spin at times.
Cab owner, that’s what my fiance is and
house owner, and a burgess of Vienna, who gets on
the box himself only when it pleases him and when
there is somebody of whom he thinks a whole lot.
Now he is driving for a certain Baron Radeiner whom
he has just brought out here to see your father, Countess.
And I am having my doubts about that Baron Radeiner.
PHILIP
Permit me to introduce myself Baron Radeiner.
LOLO
So that’s you, Your Highness?
PHILIP
I have let nobody but Wasner drive me since I came
here.
LOLO
And under an assumed name at that,
Your Highness? Well, we are finding out a lot
of nice things about you!
COUNT (appears, very hot)
Well, here I am. (Taking in the situation)
Ah!
LOLO
Your humble servant, Count! I
have taken the liberty I wanted to thank
you for the magnificent flowers.
COUNT
Oh, please it was a great pleasure....
PRINCE
And here, old friend, is my son Philip.
PHILIP
I regard myself as greatly honored, Count.
COUNT (giving his hand to Philip)
I bid you welcome to my house.
Please consider yourself at home here. I
don’t think any further introductions are required.
MIZZIE
No, papa.
COUNT (slightly embarrassed)
It’s very charming of you, my
dear lady. Of course, you know better than anybody
that I have always been one of your admirers....
But tell me, please, how in the world did you get
out here? I have just been taking a walk along
the main road, where every carriage has to pass, and
I didn’t see you.
LOLO
What do you take me for, Count?
My cab days are past now. I came by the train,
which is the proper thing for me.
COUNT
I see.... But I hear that your fiance himself....
LOLO
Oh, he has more pretentious customers to look after.
PHILIP
Yes, I have just had the pleasure
of being conducted here by the fiance of Miss Pallestri.
COUNT
Is Wasner driving for you? Well,
that settles it of course clear
psychological connection! (Offers his cigar case)
Want a smoke?
PHILIP (accepting)
Thank you.
PRINCE
But, Philip...! A monster like that before lunch!
COUNT
Excellent. Nothing better for
the health. And I like you. Suppose we sit
down.
[The Count, the Prince and Philip
seat themselves, while Mizzie and Lolo remain standing
close to them.
COUNT
So you’ll be off with your father to-morrow?
PHILIP
Yes, Count. And I’m tremendously pleased
to think of it.
COUNT
Will you be gone long?
PRINCE
That depends on several circumstances.
PHILIP
I have to report myself at the regiment
on the first of October.
PRINCE
And it’s possible that I may
go farther south after that.
COUNT
Well, that’s news. Where?
PRINCE (with a glance at Mizzie)
Egypt, and the Sudan maybe for a little
hunting.
MIZZIE (to Lolo)
Let me show you the park.
LOLO
It’s a marvel. Ours isn’t
a patch on it, of course. (She and Mizzie come
forward)
MIZZIE
Have you a garden at your place, too?
LOLO
Certainly. As well as an ancestral
palace at Ottakring. The great-grandfather
of Wasner was in the cab business in his days already. My,
but that’s beautiful! The way those flowers
are hanging down. I must have something just
like it.
COUNT (disturbed)
Why are the ladies leaving us?
MIZZIE
Never mind, papa, I’m merely explaining the
architecture of our façade.
PHILIP
Do you often get visits of theatrical ladies, Count?
COUNT
No, this is merely an accident.
[The men stroll off toward those
parts of the garden that are not visible.
MIZZIE
It seems strange that I have never
before had a chance of meeting you. I am very
glad to see you.
LOLO (with a grateful glance)
And so I am. Of course, I have known you by sight
these many years.
Often and often have I looked up at your box.
MIZZIE
But not at me.
LOLO
Oh, that’s all over now.
MIZZIE
Do you know, I really feel a little offended on
his behalf.
LOLO
Offended, you say...?
MIZZIE
It will be a hard blow for him.
Nobody knows better than I how deeply he has been
attached to you. Although he has never said a
word to me about it.
LOLO
Do you think it’s so very easy
for me either, Countess? But tell me. Countess,
what else could I do? I am no longer a spring
chicken, you know. And one can’t help hankering
for something more settled. As long as I had
a profession of my own, I could allow myself what
do they call it now? to entertain liberal
ideas. It goes in a way with the position I have
held. But how would that look now, when I am retiring
to private life?
MIZZIE
Oh, I can see that perfectly.
But what is he going to do now?
LOLO
Why shouldn’t he marry, too?
I assure you, Countess, that there are many who would
give all their five fingers.... Don’t you
realize, Countess, that I, too, have found it a hard
step to take?
MIZZIE
Do you know what I have been wondering
often? Whether he never thought of making you
his wife?
LOLO
Oh, yes, that’s just what he wanted.
MIZZIE
Why...?!
LOLO
Do you know when he asked me the last
time, Countess? Less than a month ago.
MIZZIE
And you said no?
LOLO
I did. It would have done no
good. Me a Countess! Can you imagine it?
I being your stepmother, Countess...! Then we
could not have been chatting nicely as we are doing
now.
MIZZIE
If you only knew how sympathetically you affect me....
LOLO
But I don’t want to appear better
than I am. And who knows what I might....
MIZZIE
What might you?
LOLO
Well, this is the truth of it.
I have gone clear off my head about Wasner. Which
I hope won’t make you think the worse of me.
In all these eighteen years I have had nothing to
blame myself with, as far as your dear papa is concerned.
But you can’t wonder if my feelings began to
cool off a little as the years passed along. And
rather than to make your dear papa oh,
no, no, Countess ... I owe him too much gratitude
for that.... Lord!
MIZZIE
What is it?
LOLO
There he is now, looking right at me.
MIZZIE (looks in the direction indicated)
WASNER (who has appeared at the
entrance, raises his tall hat in salute)
LOLO
Don’t you think me an awful
fool, Countess? Every time I catch sight of him
suddenly, my heart starts beating like everything.
Yes, there’s no fool like an old one.
MIZZIE
Old...? Do you call yourself
old? Why, there can’t be much difference
between us.
LOLO
Oh, mercy.... (With a glance at Mizzie)
MIZZIE
I am thirty-seven. No,
don’t look at me with any pity. There is
no cause for that. None whatever.
LOLO (apparently relieved)
I have heard some whispers. Countess of
course, I didn’t believe anything. But
I thank heaven it was true. (They shake hands)
MIZZIE
I should like to congratulate your
fiance right now, if you’ll permit me.
LOLO
That’s too sweet of you but
what about the Count perhaps he wouldn’t
like...?
MIZZIE
My dear, I have always been accustomed
to do as I pleased. (They go together toward the
entrance)
WASNER
You’re too kind, Countess....
[The Count, the Prince and Philip
have reappeared in the meantime.
COUNT
Look at that, will you!
WASNER
Good morning, Count. Good morning, Highness.
PRINCE
I say, Wasner, you may just as well
take your bride home in that trap of yours. My
son is coming with me.
WASNER
Your son...?
PHILIP
Why haven’t you told me that you were engaged,
Wasner?
WASNER
Well, there are things you haven’t
told either ... Mr. von Radeiner!
COUNT (to Lolo)
Thank you very much for your friendly
visit, and please accept my very best wishes.
LOLO
The same to you, Count. And I
must say, that when one has such a daughter....
MIZZIE
It’s too bad I haven’t come to know you
before.
LOLO
Oh, really, Countess....
MIZZIE
Once more, my dear Miss Lolo, good
luck to you! (Mizzie embraces
Lolo)
COUNT (looks on with surprise and
some genuine emotion)
LOLO
I thank you for the kind reception, Count and
good-by!
COUNT
Good-by, Miss Langhuber. I trust
you’ll be happy ... indeed I do, Lolo.
LOLO (gets into the carriage which
has driven up to the gate in the meantime)
WASNER (is on the box, hat in hand; they drive
off)
MIZZIE (waves her hand at them as they disappear)
PHILIP (who has been standing in
the foreground with the Prince) Oh, my dear papa,
I can see through the whole story.
PRINCE
You can?
PHILIP
This Miss Lolo must be the natural
daughter of the Count, and a sister of the Countess her
foster-sister, as they say.
PRINCE
No, you would call that a step-sister.
But go on, Mr. Diplomat.
PHILIP
And of course, both are in love with
you both the Countess and the ballet dancer.
And this marriage between the dancer and Wasner is
your work.
PRINCE
Go on.
PHILIP
You know there’s
something I never thought of until just now!
PRINCE
What?
PHILIP
I don’t know if I dare?
PRINCE
Why so timid all at once?
PHILIP
Supposing my mother was not dead....
PRINCE
H’m....
PHILIP
And, through a remarkable combination
of circumstances, she should now be going back to
the city in the very carriage that brought me out
here...? And suppose it should be my own mother,
whose picture I cut out of that newspaper...?
PRINCE
My lad, you’ll certainly end
as a cabinet minister Secretary of Agriculture,
if nothing better. But now it’s time
for us to say good-by.
[The Count and Mizzie are coming forward again.
PRINCE
Well, my dear friend, this must be
our farewell call, I am sorry to say.
COUNT
But why don’t you stay....
That would be delightful ... if you could take lunch
with us....
PRINCE
Unfortunately, it isn’t possible.
We have an appointment at Sacher’s.
COUNT
That’s really too bad.
And shall I not see you at all during the Summer?
PRINCE
Oh, we shall not be entirely out of touch.
COUNT
And are you starting to-morrow already?
PRINCE
Yes.
COUNT
Where are you going?
PRINCE
To the sea shore Ostend.
COUNT
Oh, you are bound for Ostend.
I have long wanted to go there.
PRINCE
But that would be fine....
COUNT
What do you think, Mizzie? Let’s
be fashionable. Let’s go to Ostend, too.
MIZZIE
I can’t answer yet. But
there’s no reason why you shouldn’t go,
papa.
PHILIP
That would be delightful, Countess.
It would please me awfully.
MIZZIE (smiling)
That’s very kind of you, Philip. (She holds
out her hand to him)
PHILIP (kisses her hand)
COUNT (to the Prince)
The children seem to get along beautifully.
PRINCE
Yes, that’s what I have been
thinking. Good-by then. Good-by, my dear
Mizzie. And good-by to you, my dear old fellow.
I hope at least to see you again at Ostend.
COUNT
Oh, she’ll come along.
Won’t you, Mizzie? After all, you can get
studios by the sea shore, too. Or how about it,
Mizzie?
MIZZIE (remains silent)
PRINCE
Well, until we meet again! (He
shakes hands with the Count and Mizzie)
PHILIP (kisses the hand of Mizzie once more)
COUNT (giving his hand to Philip)
It has been a great pleasure.
[The Prince and Philip go out through
the gate and step into the carriage which has been
driving up in the meantime, and which now carries
them off. The Count and Mizzie come forward again
and seat themselves at the table under the tree.
Pause.
COUNT
Hasn’t this been a queer day?
MIZZIE
All life is queer only we forget it most
of the time.
COUNT
I suppose you’re right. (Pause)
MIZZIE
You know, papa, you might just as
well have brought us together a little earlier.
COUNT
Who? Oh, you and....
MIZZIE
Me and Miss Lolo. She’s a dear.
COUNT
So you like her? Well, if it
were only possible to know in advance.... But
what’s the use? Now it’s all over.
MIZZIE (takes hold of his hand)
COUNT (rises and kisses her on
the forehead; strolls about aimlessly for a few seconds)
Tell me, Mizzie, what you think.... How do you
like the boy?
MIZZIE
Philip? Oh, rather fresh.
COUNT
Fresh, perhaps, but smart. I
hope he’ll stay in the army. That’s
a much more sensible career than the diplomatic service.
Slow, but sure. All you need is to live long
enough in order to become a general. But a political
career.... Now look at Egon ... three times he
has almost become a minister.... And suppose
he had succeeded? (Walking back and forth)
Yes, yes ... we shall be rather lonely this Summer.
MIZZIE
But why shouldn’t you go to Ostend, papa?
COUNT
Yes, why not...? Really, won’t
you come along? It would be rather ... without
you, you know.... It’s no use looking at
me like that. I know! I haven’t paid
as much attention to you in the past as I should have....
MIZZIE (taking his hand again)
Oh, papa, you’re not going to
apologize, are you? I understand perfectly.
COUNT
Oh, well. But, you see, I shall
not get much joy out of that trip without you.
And what would you be doing here, all by yourself?
You can’t paint all day long.
MIZZIE
The only trouble is ... the Prince
has asked me to marry him.
COUNT
What? Is it possible? No,
you don’t mean.... And ... and you said
no?
MIZZIE
Practically.
COUNT
You did...? Oh, well....
After all, I have never tried to persuade you.
It must be as you.... But I can’t understand
why. I have noticed for a long time, that he....
As far as age is concerned, you wouldn’t be
badly matched. And as for the rest ... sixty millions
are not to be despised exactly. But just as you
say.
MIZZIE (remains silent)
COUNT
Or could it possibly be on account
of the boy? That would be to exaggerate the matter,
I assure you. Things of that kind occur in the
very best families. And particularly when you
consider that his heart always remained with his wife....
All of a sudden you get dragged into an affair of
that kind without exactly knowing how.
MIZZIE
And some poor girl of the people is
thrown aside and allowed to go to the dogs.
COUNT
Oh, please, that’s only in the
books. And how could he help it? That kind
of women seem always to die off early. And who
knows what he might have done, if she hadn’t
died.... I really think that his action in regard
to the boy has been pretty decent. That took courage,
you know. I could tell you more than one case....
But don’t let us talk of it. If that should
be the only thing against him, however.... And
besides, our being together at Ostend wouldn’t
commit you in any way.
MIZZIE
No, that’s true.
COUNT
Well, then ... I tell you what.
You make the trip with me. And if the place suits
you, you can stay. If not, you can go on to London
for a visit with Aunt Lora. I mean simply, that
there is no sense in your letting me go away alone.
MIZZIE
All right.
COUNT
What do you mean?
MIZZIE
I’ll go with you. But without
any obligation absolutely free.
COUNT
You’ll come with me, you say?
MIZZIE
I will, papa.
COUNT
Oh, I’m so glad. Thank you, Mizzie.
MIZZIE
Why should you thank me? It’s a pleasure
to me.
COUNT
You can’t imagine, of course
... without you, Mizzie.... There would be so
much to remember this time in particular....
You know, of course, that I took Lolo to Normandy
last year?
MIZZIE
Of course, I know....
COUNT
And as far as Egon is concerned ...
not that I want to persuade you by any means ... but
in a strange place like that you often get more acquainted
with a person in a couple of days than during many
years at home.
MIZZIE
It’s settled now that I go with
you, papa. And as for the rest, don’t let
us talk of it for the time being.
COUNT
Then, you know, I’m going to
telephone to the ticket office at once and reserve
sleeping car compartments for the day after to-morrow or
for to-morrow.
MIZZIE
Are you in such a hurry?
COUNT
What’s the use of sitting about
here, once we have made up our minds? So I’ll
telephone.... Does that suit you?
MIZZIE
Yes.
COUNT (puts his arms about her)
PROFESSOR WINDHOFER (appears at the garden gate)
COUNT
Why, there’s the professor. Have you a
lesson to-day?
MIZZIE
I had forgotten it, too.
PROFESSOR (handsome; about thirty-five;
his beard is blond and trimmed to a point; he is very
carefully dressed, and wears a gray overcoat; he takes
off his hat as he enters the garden and comes forward)
Good morning, Countess. How do you do, Count?
COUNT
Good morning, my dear Professor, and
how are you? You have to pardon me. I was
just about to go to the telephone we are
going away, you know.
PROFESSOR
Oh, are you going away? Please, don’t let
me detain you.
COUNT
I suppose I shall see you later, Professor.
(He goes into the house)
PROFESSOR
So you are going away, Countess?
MIZZIE
Yes, to Ostend.
PROFESSOR
That’s rather a sudden decision.
MIZZIE
Yes, rather. But that’s my way.
PROFESSOR
That means an end to the lessons for
the present, I suppose? Too bad.
MIZZIE
I don’t think I shall be able
to-day even ... I am feeling a little upset.
PROFESSOR
Do you? Well, you look rather pale, Maria.
MIZZIE
Oh, you think so?
PROFESSOR
And how long will you be gone?
MIZZIE
Until the Fall probably perhaps
until very late in the Fall even.
PROFESSOR
Then we can resume our lessons next
November at the earliest, I suppose?
MIZZIE (smiling)
I don’t think we shall....
PROFESSOR
Oh, you don’t think so? (They look hard at
each other)
MIZZIE
No, I don’t.
PROFESSOR
Which means, Maria that I am discharged.
MIZZIE
How can you put it that way, Rudolph? That is
not quite fair.
PROFESSOR
Pardon me. But it really came
a little more suddenly than I had expected.
MIZZIE
Better that than have it come too
slow. Don’t you think so?
PROFESSOR
Well, girl, I have no intention whatever
to make any reproaches.
MIZZIE
Well, you have no reason. And
it wouldn’t be nice either. (She holds out
her hand to him)
PROFESSOR (takes her hand and kisses it)
Will you please excuse me to the Count?
MIZZIE
Are you going already...?
PROFESSOR (unconcernedly)
Isn’t that better?
MIZZIE (after a pause, during which she looks straight
into his eyes)
Yes, I think so. (They shake hands)
PROFESSOR
Good luck, Maria.
MIZZIE
Same to you.... And remember me to your wife
and the children.
PROFESSOR
I won’t forget, Countess. (He goes out)
MIZZIE (remains on the same spot
for a little while, following him with her eyes)
COUNT (on the terrace)
Everything is ready. We’ll
leave at nine-thirty to-morrow night. But
what has become of the professor?
MIZZIE
I sent him away.
COUNT
Oh, you did? And can you
guess who has the compartment between yours and mine?...
Egon and his young gentleman. Won’t they
be surprised though?
MIZZIE
Yes ... won’t they? (She goes into the house)